


You Wouldn't Like Me (if you met me)

by Chronicles_of_Scout



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Adult Content, Angst, F/F, F/M, Kalex, Mild Language, Romance, Sign Language, Slow Burn, Torture, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-02
Updated: 2018-11-09
Packaged: 2019-02-26 14:08:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 26
Words: 295,604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13237341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chronicles_of_Scout/pseuds/Chronicles_of_Scout
Summary: The House of El had a plan when they sent the last of their children from Krypton's destruction.Kal-El swore to protect his new home, Earth.  Even from his own people.The Danvers family were just trying to save a little alien girl.They all failed.  And Alex is still trying to fix it.





	1. Prologue: If this is to End in Fire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Song:  
> Ed Sheeran- I See Fire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello All,
> 
> Quick notes: This is a multi chapter that deals with some serious themes so to avoid the angry comments let me put some warnings. There will be talk of self-harm, sexual assault (not what your probably thinking), violence, torture, abuse, bigotry, sexism, and more. There will also be fun and fluff but since there are mentions of the above I thought I'd be polite in case anyone gets triggered by these things.
> 
> Only the plot idea is mine, everything else belongs to DC.
> 
> Also, some elements of last Superman movie, Man of Steel, are in here.
> 
> This chapter was beta'd by Keziah. Check out their stuff, I'm working through some of it and its pretty awesome.
> 
> Chapter count subject to change.
> 
> And I believe that's all. Enjoy folks!
> 
> P.S. if this doesn't get updated its because I died from the ebola/black plague/ malaria/ evil spawn of death virus that has infected me.

** Prologue: If This is to End in Fire **

Argo city was in chaos; the planet’s temperature was reaching its critical point and, as a result, the world was literally shaking. Red painted the heavens as Rao himself unleashed his anger on his people. The earth quaked and acid fell from the sky, causing the inhabitants to panic and scramble for shelter.

Alura watched with bated breath as yet another fissure appeared, spewing magma and ash into the air and decimating any its wake. Kara clutched her tighter, the smaller girl’s face buried in her mother’s neck, arms wrapped tightly around her waist. Her daughter had not yet reached her growth year, still short enough to just reach Alura’s chest; soon she may well be as tall as her father. At least that had been Astra’s hope - according to her sister being short was as good as a death sentence. Astra of course had been the taller twin.

Heart clenching at the thought of her sister, Alura pushed her child away, holding onto her shoulders as she ducked down to make eye contact.

“We need to go Kara. I need you to be very quiet ok?” Her thumbs moved over the girl’s cheeks brushing away stray tears.

“Ok.” Was the croaked response before Kara was crawling back into her arms. Despite her lack of height, she was still slightly too big to be carried comfortably, but Alura would make do. Every second between here and Earth may very well be their last; she would take every opportunity to hold her child that she could.

Jor-El chose that moment to come into the hall, his face ashen and eyes bloodshot; a blaster rifle held firmly in his arms.

“Lara is waiting at the launch point.” His words were short and dismissive, and he was turning to leave before they were even done. “We need to leave. Now.”

Alura hurried to follow, Kara’s grip tightening. “But Zor-El. Jor! Your brother--”

“Dead.” Was the clipped reply, Alura stumbling at the news and forcing a whimper from Kara. “Or he will be soon. The fool is in the Guilds, trying to stabilize what’s left of us. He says he can buy us time.”

Still following behind her brother in law, Alura swallowed bile. This hadn’t been the plan. Lara was supposed to be here. Zor-El was supposed to be here.

“Je.Ju?” Kara’s whimper brought her back to the present and she pressed a small kiss to her daughter’s head.

“It’s ok Kara. Everything’s going to be ok, my love.” Plan or no plan, her daughter would survive this; her father was giving his life right now for them to survive this. Alura would not allow herself to ruin everything because of her emotions.

Not now.

Banging from their right filtered into the room, and Alura had just enough time to duck behind a pillar before soldiers stormed the room and released a hail of energy blasts. Jor-El was brutally efficient in his executions, taking down their attackers one by one.

And still they came. The large man forced them behind him taking a protective stance and sandwiching them between himself and the pillar as more soldiers spilled into the room. Her brother in law bared his teeth, blaster at the ready and Alura reached to her side, pulling her sword. _Astra’s sword._

Except she needn’t have done so, a force from behind the group drawing their attention, as pained screams and shouts of horror filled the area.

Kitai-El had been an orphan that Zor-El had sponsored to the military guild at the behest of Astra and Alura. The twins had thought the young girl to be the cutest thing they’d ever seen before Kara had been born. Astra had yearned for a child at the time, but the council had denied her request for adoption. Instead Zor-El had found out, sponsored her, and given her into the care of Astra as a ‘wedding gift’ to his wife. The sisters had teased him mercilessly about his ‘soft heart’ but Alura had never been more pleased. As a smaller family, the Ze household did not command the respect that the House of El had; Zor-El had been nothing but generous in his pursuit of Alura. He had always told her that his greatest wish was to make her happy, sponsoring Kitai had made Astra happy; making Astra happy made Alura happy. For him, it had been simple.

When Kara had been born, she and Kitai had been inseparable; the older girl calling her as her own sister.

When Astra had entered the guild, everyone had said they had never met her equal. That she fought as if in a dance.

Alura had just watched as Kitai-El had become her equal tonight. Dancing between her opponents, finding weaknesses and armor chinks that no one else would have been able to see. Her enemies fell before her as if they were mere recruits rather than fully seasoned military personnel. She was ruthless, leaving no man or woman alive in the wake of her blade; were she anyone else, Alura would have been frightened. As it was, she felt nothing but relief. And pain; devastation.

She pushed the latter feeling down deep, steeling herself for their next move.

The younger woman stood now in blood stained armor, her shorn brown hair pasted closely to her scalp. The House of El symbol gleamed proudly on the silver plating on her chest, a naked blade in her hand. Two of the House of El guards stood behind her, faces set in a grim line and eyes alert for more trouble. All told the three of them had just taken out at least twenty armed men and women.

“You must hurry, Uncle; whatever your plan, you need to get them out of here.” Kitai’s eyes flicked to Kara’s, a wave of affection coming over her features. “I’ll not have them harm mije.”

Kara cried out and was in Kitai’s arms before the other woman could properly brace for impact, stumbling just so.

“Come with us!” Kara pleaded, her voice muffled in Kitai’s neck, arms wrapped solidly around her older sister.

“I cannot. I will stay here and assure you are not followed.” Kitai pulled away, stooping slightly so they were to look into Kara’s face properly. Her eyes scanned over the younger girl’s features, trying to implant everything in her memory. Alura had done the same thing when their world had started to implode. “Your job is to _live_ mije! That is my only wish. That you live and be happy. Try to do that for me ok?” Kara nodded hopelessly, pressing her face into Kitai’s armor, uncaring of the blood there. The soldier’s arms banded around her little sister as she pressed her lips to her hair, eyes shining with tears. The sound of running footsteps interrupted the tender moment and Kitai visibly steeled herself before pushing Kara away. “You need to go Great Scion. I love you always.”

Alura’s heart broke at her daughter’s sobs and pleas of love, but she steeled herself as she pulled Kara away. She took a second to press a kiss to the other woman’s cheek, murmuring a quick, “stick to the plan”, her heart heavy as she moved away. Kitai had not even reached her 20th name day. She was just a child.

The girl turned away from her, her team flanking her as they met the soldiers coming up the steps. It was impossible; there were many more of them now, at least one hundred. She moved quickly towards Jor-El and grabbing her arm, he continued through the building with quickened steps. When they reached the stables, Kara released her and ran over to Saljane, her Kay’log. The beast was vast and had been given to her as a present from Jor-El and Lara.

Alura lifted her onto the Kay’log’s back, moving up herself and positioning her legs in front of the four massive wings on the creature’s sides. Next to her, Jor-El mounted his own Kay’log, a beast he affectionately called Zori. Zor-El had not been pleased; Jor-El had been unable to stop laughing.

Jor-El looked over at them, his eye’s meeting Kara’s as he offered her a small smile. “I need you to be brave now sweet girl; you need to follow me and make sure you get your mother to safety, understood?”

Kara’s small face was a mask of seriousness and she tightened her hold on Saljane’s collar as she gave her uncle a nod.

In unison they shot off into the sky, and all at once she became a part of the aerial battle. Jor-El pushed Zori ahead of them, whistling commands sharply. Saljane followed his every move, diving and dodging propulsion blasts and missiles.

“Dive!” Jor-El’s shout caused Alura to look up in time to see two military transports come at them from either direction. The shout of fear was lodged in her throat when Kara pushed forward, forcing Saljane into a steep descent that led them between bridges and roads and ever closer to the erupting surface of Krypton. Alura sent out a prayer to Rao when she looked over her shoulder and saw a class of Kryptonians from the military guild shooting in their direction, their jetpacks rocketing them faster than Saljane could fly.

She squeezed her eyes shut as fear overwhelmed her and tightened her hold on her daughter, trying to cover her as much as she could. If nothing else, Kara _would_ survive this. That was her only goal. The sound of Jor-El’s blaster reached her ears, but she knew even he couldn’t get them all.

And then Kara was pulling up, a shout of defiance leaving her lips and heat flooding Alura’s skin. The screams from the soldiers were haunting but Alura could feel nothing but relief as they were swallowed by the lava that had shot from the ground.

Jor-El banked beside them, the rest of the ride largely uneventful as they finally arrived at the Van tower. Lara raced for her husband and was in his arms the second he had dismounted. Alura allowed them a moment of peace before the sounds of the war and destruction outside forced her hand.

“Jor-El we need to go.”

The man looked at her with nothing but pain before finally nodding and leading them further into the building.

“We will take this pod.” He said, indicating a doorway to his right. “You and Kara will get settled in that pod and I will be in shortly to send you off.”

Alura nodded, feeling more in control now that she knew what was supposed to be happening. Their plan had been simple after they had managed to repair and hide the two pods that had been stowed away in the Science Guild. They had hidden them on one of Lara’s family properties. The Van family, while noble in their own right, would not garner nearly as much attention as the House of El. They’d thought this route safest. But then Krypton had exploded, vastly moving up their timeline. The plan had called for Lara and Alura to ride with the children in their pods, and for the brothers to ride in their own behind them. The fact that Jor-El would be launching them told Alura that Zor-El had not been able to finish his work.

She swallowed the sob that had threatened to overwhelm her and ushered her daughter to their designated pod, climbing in first and then pulling Kara close to her chest. Reaching in front of her she started the launch process from her end; they wouldn’t have much time if the soldiers reached them.

She found herself filling the silence by explaining what she was doing to Kara, her daughter’s sniffles having left her on the ride over. An explosion from the room ahead of them had Alura looking up to see Jor-El engaged in a fight with General Zod. Eyes darting over in panic, she found Lara at the console, frantically punching at the keypad there.

“Kara.” She started, already pushing her daughter forward and scrambling out of the pod. “Kara, listen to me.” Big blue eyes stared up at her with fear and Alura finally allowed that sob to work its way out of her throat. She pressed a shaky kiss to her daughter’s head, and with fumbling fingers transferred her necklace to Kara’s throat. “Your father and I—we love you more than _anything_ Kara. That’s why we’re sending you away love. It’s not going to make any sense right now, but hopefully one day you will understand.”

Kara was already shaking her head, tears spilling over and running in heavy streams down her face. “No! No, mom _please._ You _promised!_ You said we would go together!”

Alura reached over her, pressing in the final commands on the pod, the sounds of fighting growing more violent. “I am so sorry Kara. I wish there was another way, but there isn’t. You and your cousin will go to earth. Due to the power we draw from Earth’s yellow sun, you will have extraordinary abilities on Earth my love. You’ll be safe there Kara. You need to take care of Kal-El, ok?” She asked, pulling back and searching her daughter’s eyes. She looked so very much like Zor-El; big blue eyes and proud chin. She was of the House of El. The last daughter.

But she had her mother’s personality and thought like Astra. Which is why Alura knew Kara needed a task, a goal to distract her from the pain of their separation. “You need to promise me, Kara.”

The sound of Kal-El’s pod pulling away forced Alura to run for the controls, her fingers flying over the keys. Zor-El had ingrained this in her brain. _Just in case_ , he’d said. Kara’s sharp cry had her looking at the other dais; at where Zod had just stabbed Jor-El through the chest. Her brother in law fell, clutching his wound as Lara screamed her hate. She swallowed bile and ran back towards her daughter, the launch control gripped tightly in her hand.

“Promise me Kara.”

“I promise!” The girl sobbed, her hands pressing against the glass Alura had just sealed.

“I love you, Kara. I love you so much.” She pressed the button for launch, her daughter’s response echoing in her ears as she shot into the sky.

The adrenaline had just begun to fade, when Zod ordered Kal-El’s pod shot down. Lara’s cry of horror cut short by the gun that hit her head. Hate filled Alura’s veins, pumping violently as she strode back to the controls.

“Kelex! I need you!”

The AI came to her at once, responding to the House of El’s command and aiding her in her mission. She was Alura In-Ze, head Judicator; wife of Zor-El, one of the greatest scientific minds of the century; sister to Astra In-Ze, most beloved military general and Alura’s own heart. She would not allow the likes of Zod to destroy what was left of her family, not when they had already lost so much. She would not allow _anyone_ to harm her children.

The missile shot straight and true, obliterating the ship that would have killed her nephew.

Her celebration was cut short as a sharp pain emerged from her chest. She looked down to see the sword protruding from her breast. Blood stained her hands, fingers futilely pressing into the wound, as she released a shaky exhale and collapsed to the floor.

She chose to ignore her killer’s words, “Traitor’s deserve only death El scum”, and instead focused on her daughter’s.

_ Mom! I love you! Please don’t leave me. I love you! Je.Ju! _

The pods reached optimal velocity, shooting clear into the mesosphere and beyond Krypton’s and therefore Zod’s reach.

They were safe. The last of El was safe.

_ Merry meet, merry part, merry meet again.  _ Alura thought, reciting the old Kryptonian parting prayer. _I will await the night you join me in the sky Kara; his will be done._ _Please Rao, protect her; protect them both._

__

~*~

This was not how she thought she would die.

I mean, she was only 15, and maybe she shouldn’t have been thinking about the how or when just yet BUT she tended to lean towards the dramatic. Teenage angst and all that. She had always imagined it being something horrific but honorable. Like jumping in front of a bus to (successfully) save a life (preferably a child or a sweet old grandma), or maybe even in a plane crash. Something memorable.

Instead she was staring at a small blonde with a cloth covered gun who was trembling head to toe. The girl had been following her for about 4 blocks, and because of her size (and clear unhingedness) Alex hadn’t been truly bothered by it. Not until she’d turned onto a deserted side street just 10 houses away from home. That’s when the blonde had run in front of her and demanded her money. Which Alex had none of. She was way too busy with classes, soccer, and surfing to have any real job. And, while tutoring helped her afford her own things from time to time it was hardly stable. So now, here she was awaiting her eminent demise by an apparently drugged out teenager. Maybe she was one of those teen moms she had seen on TV? The ones who did _stuff_ for drugs and money and left their kid with god knows who?

“—you not hear?” The girl asked, her face tilted and masked in confusion and … worry?

Right she was being mugged. How rude of her.

Although she made sure to keep her hands in the air to show she was defenseless, she couldn’t hold back her wise comment. “I can hear you fine. I just don’t have any money on me and I don’t want to die so I’m thinking of what to do.” At least she could die with her snark.

But then the blonde did a complete 180. At the word ‘die’ her face morphed into shock and horror, before she stared down at her ‘gun’ and frantically shook her head. She pulled her hands up to mirror Alex and the sorrow stretched across her face was the only thing that kept Alex from walking away. The stupid gun had been her stupid hand!

“I must beg your forgiveness miss and give you my word that I meant you no harm. I would never harm you. OR ANYONE. I wouldn’t harm anyone. I have been trying to… I saw the other children watching a screen that depicted this behavior in exchange for goods.”

Now it wasn’t just the obvious regret that kept Alex’s feet planted. This girl’s accent was seriously awesome! Like Spanish and Australian mixed together, but not. She couldn’t accurately describe it except that it was beautiful, even if her mannerisms were weird.

“Right,” she drawled, her arms coming to cross around her chest. Leaning her weight to one side, Alex reassessed the girl in front of her. She was shorter than Alex by a solid 4 inches at least, and very scrawny looking, ‘spaghetti arms’ her gym teacher called them. And the way she held herself was very uncertain, as if she wasn’t quite sure what to do with her limbs. She reminded Alex of a baby giraffe; even her hair matched the coloring. It was a soft blonde with some mottled hues of brown streaked through at random, and, while her skin was fair, it did still hold some color. Pulling her attention to the girl’s face, Alex’s eyes travelled over a strong brow, eyebrows matching the shade of her hair perfectly, down a barely there bridge that ended in a cute button nose. Her lips were larger than most girls Alex knew, but they fit her face, even if they were currently trembling. A slightly squared chin followed along a clearly defined jawline, up to cheeks still filled with ‘baby fat’, and finally up to clear blue eyes.

Beautiful eyes.

“What’s your name?” the brunette asked, continuing to size the girl up. Now that she knew the girl didn’t have a gun, it was pretty clear that she could take her in a fight. You don’t grow up with Superman as your pseudo family without learning how to throw a punch.

The girl drew herself up to her full height, her hands coming in front of her abdomen stacked on top of each other, fingertips spread, palms open and not touching.

“I am Kara Zor-El, Last Scion of the House of El.” The blonde informed her, bowing ever so minutely at the waist.

Alex froze, her heart once again picking up speed. “El? As in Krypton?” She asked, voice coated in disbelief.

The girl’s, Kara’s, face lit up and she nodded eagerly. “You know my family name? Can you help me? Please? I do not have much but you may take whatever you like from my pack.” Here she slipped off the knapsack like bag that Alex hadn’t noticed on her shoulder and offered it up to the brunette. “If you could please just help me find some food. I am very hungry…”

Alex’s frown deepened when the blonde pulled her bottom lip between her teeth and shifted her feet. This made no sense. Kal had said he was the last remaining Kryptonian. He had told Alex he was the last of his kind. Had said there were no other survivors after he had gotten rid of Zod and his followers. And yet here was this small blonde girl claiming to be from a destroyed world that no one had any knowledge of. She had seen Kal make that same gesture when introducing himself as Superman though, maybe the girl had just picked up on that. Easy way to find out.

Alex blinked as her fist met air and immediately turned to see the girl looking at her in alarm from across the street, feet poised to take off, a betrayed look upon her face.

“I’ll help you.” The words came out of her in a rush. She didn’t want to scare the girl, but she had had to make sure. And that obvious use of superspeed proved that she wasn’t from earth at least. “I know Kal-El. I’ll get in touch with him and he’ll sort this whole thing out, I promise.”

Kara was by her side in an instant. Another use of superspeed. Kal had told her that it was the first power he had gotten besides flight, because his body had been used to a denser atmosphere with stronger gravitational pulls. He said walking on earth for him was probably what walking on the moon felt like to humans.

“You know Kal-El? Where is he? Is he well? Who has been caring for him? I promise I will find a means to repay them! As soon as I am able I will assume the role of his guardian.” Although her words were rushed, Alex understood all of them. This girl honestly thought that Kal needed her guardianship. This was getting more and more weird. She needed to get them home. Now. Before she blew a gasket.

“Let’s just get to my house okay. We can talk more there. It’s not exactly safe for you to be super speeding around in broad daylight where anyone can see you.”

The older girl held out her hand expectantly and Kara eyed it for a second before grasping it in her own. Alex felt her knuckles pop and yelped.

Kara jumped away. Or flew more accurately.

This was going to be a long day.

~*~

Kara’s head felt like it had been stuffed full. 23 years. Her pod had been delayed for 23 years. Kal-El was an adult now. She’d missed her chance.

She’d thought it had all been a dream. Had remembered those few moments of consciousness where she’d been able to see nothing but a black abyss. She hadn’t even been able to see her own hands. Had thought it was Rao’s punishment for trying to escape the destruction of her home. Had thought she had been meant to die on Krypton; tried multiple times to finish the job, but there had been nothing in her pod to work with. At least nothing she could see, and then the anxiety would kick in, and she’d hyperventilate until she passed out. When she had finally landed on Earth, she had thought her punishment was over. That Rao had tested her and maybe seen her worthy of caring for her baby cousin.

She had been wrong.

A warm hand settled on her shoulder, and she looked up into Alex’s eyes.

Alex Danvers. Kara found the human fascinating, especially her eyes. They were brown but not. When Kara looked into them she could see flecks of coal and gold, as if the two substances had merged to create the perfect blend of color. The more she looked the more she saw, until Alex had not so nicely shoved her face away and directed her towards the kitchen, her short ponytail bobbing behind her as she rolled her eyes at Kara’s “lack of chill.”

The older girl had been a comforting presence, even as her parents broke down everything Kara had been holding onto. Krypton was gone. Kal-El was an adult. Kara was nothing.

They offered her food in the form of “pizza”. It was delicious and was meant to be eaten with one’s hands. Eliza Danvers had recalled that Kal-El had had trouble controlling his strength as a child and was taking the extra precaution. Kara could not blame her after what she had done to her daughter’s hand. Besides “pizza” was delicious, and they let her have as much as she wanted, with Alex showing her the proper way to fold and bite into the warm melty goodness. She thought cheese might be her new favorite food.

While they ate, Alex’s parents tried to explain the new rules she would have to follow. Basically, they wanted her to play the role of human. They explained that not everyone was sympathetic to aliens, and that there were a lot of humans who feared them. Kara nodded. She had known this, they had studied this as younglings. Earth’s culture was still so uncivilized. But then they had explained about the experiments, about humans and aliens alike who would want to run tests on her to try to steal or replicate her powers if they ever found out who she was. Fear was a powerful thing and it made the rest of Kara’s appetite disappear.

“It was very brave of your parents to send you here Kara.” Eliza was saying. “And what forward thinking; to have your pod teach you English in transit. How does that work?”

“Ifs nuffa herd ish I oomer enni I eep.” Correction: cheese was definitely her new favorite food. And the fizzy substance! That was divine!

Jeremiah’s hand came out to stop her from lifting the plastic cup to her lips and she felt her lips pull into a pout.

He smiled kindly at her but kept his hand in place. “Can you please swallow your food sweetheart? We couldn’t understand you.”

Heat rushed to her cheeks. Of course! Her parents would be most displeased!

“I am very sorry. I meant to say that it was not difficult and that I would be able to program such things in my sleep, had I the Kryptonian technology and tools to do so.” She carefully placed her food on her plate before giving Eliza her full attention. “Kryptonian technology works through a sort of injection or download. Our technology is living and can bond to us to teach us new skills and wisdom. We simply need to be genetically compatible with the knowledge given. For example, a school mate Tavi-Re was genetically compatible to the engineering fields, he would not have done well with a culinary download. He would have been able to see the knowledge, but his mind would not have been able to process the skills necessary.”

Jeremiah and Eliza looked fascinated.

“Do you know how to make a lightsaber?”

Alex’s question turned those expressions into exasperation, at least on Eliza’s part. Jeremiah looked just as fascinated as he awaited her response.

When she told them that she did not know what a “lightsaber” was, Alex was visibly disappointed, but Jeremiah simply filled the time asking her more questions about what she did know and encouraging her to eat.

Eventually Eliza and Jeremiah Danvers declared that it was “bedtime” and asked Alex to share her room with Kara until other arrangements could be made. Kara learned about human hygiene practices and discovered she did not mind showers, even if she did miss the large bathing chambers on Krypton.

Alex decided that it would be best for them to sleep head to foot. To avoid any “weirdness” she said. Kara did not mind. Her body had been hyper aware for almost 3 weeks. She was ready to rest. It seemed her eyes had barely closed before they were opening again; Alex’s worried face looking down at her, her nails digging harshly into the sensitive skin of Kara’s ears. Kara pulled her face away from the uncomfortable touch and realized she was crying. And then she couldn’t stop.

She wanted her mother. She wanted her mother very badly. She wanted Kitai, and Aunt Astra, and Uncle Jor-El. She wanted her _father._ She didn’t want to be anyone’s experiment, she was scared and she wanted her mom.

Slowly she became aware of Alex’s body curling around her own. Of Alex making soft shushing noises and pulling her fingers slowly though Kara’s hair.

“I won’t let that happen. I promise. No one’s taking you anywhere. They’ll have to go through me first. Clark will come, and he’ll know what to do. We’ll figure this out, I promise. You’re not alone Kara. I’ve got you.”

There were more words, and more gentle touches and eventually they lulled Kara back to sleep.

Jeremiah went to check on them in the morning, having already decided that it would be best for Alex to stay home when he saw the dried tear marks on Kara’s face and the protective stance Alex held even in sleep. Her body closest to the door, and arms wrapped securely around the smaller girl.

Jeremiah sighed. They would all need to make adjustments. He knew Eliza wouldn’t like it but there was no way he was turning his back on that little girl. She’d been through too much and she deserved a break. Maybe he could move his office to the basement and give Kara that room instead. Allow her some privacy.

His planning and Alex’s promises would prove to be for naught.

Kal-El never came, despite multiple attempts to contact him.

6 months later Jeremiah was gone, vanished.

Kara was taken a scant 2 weeks later.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Je.Ju is mother according to the Krypton dictionary.
> 
> Je is sister. Instead of saying my je, I borrowed from spanish and changed it to mije. Mija is the shortened for mi hija which is my daughter in spanish. So mije is technically my own form of kryptonian slang: my sister.
> 
> This fic was originally inspired by a picture I saw on tumblr of Alex as the Winter Soldier. So I thought, Kara as the winter soldier would be so boss, but than it turned into waaaay more than a Winter Soldier AU. This has really transformed into a love letter to every movie, book or poem that ever made me laugh, cry, or think. There will be a ton of references, feel free to point them out. Also, I don't really have an update schedule, kind of just winging it BUT this is mostly kind of almost near completion. So I thank you in advance for the patience... thank you.


	2. And It Started With a Little Kiss (Like This)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We catch up with Alex and her shenananigans...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey Guys!
> 
> This is late, totally meant to post this before tonight's episode... but than I went to sleep instead... my bad.
> 
> Warning: Some Violence in this chapter
> 
> Chapter Beta'd by Keziah
> 
> Song: Walk This Way- Aerosmith and Run DMC

** And It Started With a Little Kiss (Like This) **

“Bu, yad yalançı dil olacaq.Nə deyəcəyəm bilmirəm, çünki yazmağa davam edin!”

  
Alex had no idea what this guy was saying, or why he was so angry.   

The irate Mahwag was gesticulating wildly with his fin-like hands, slapping them together loudly like a seal.  It was an act of aggression, which basically meant he wanted her dead.  No surprise there.  A lot of people wanted Alex dead nowadays.  Again, she had no idea why.  She was such a nice person.  
  


Arturo, that was the Mahwag’s name, slapped his fins loudly in her face and she forced herself to pay closer attention to his anger.    
  


“Heç bir insanın ən gözəl insan olduğunu sevirəm! Möhtəşəm!”

  
Mahwag’s were amphimorphs, humanoid amphibians, and by nature were aggressive, territorial creatures.  The slapping of fins was not a threat it was an imminent promise.  They towered over humans, usually standing at around seven and a half feet tall, with grey skin, and a long narrow face.  They were quad ocular creatures, but had developed the ability to hide their lateral eyes to blend in more.  Not that this guy was great at blending in anywhere.  With his amphibian like skin, the Mahwag was forced to replenish his fluids constantly, which placed them in areas with high fresh water concentration.  These were generally small towns, and the tall grey creature stuck out like a sore thumb, which is how Alex had been tipped off to him in the first place.  She’d had the upper hand for months, and yet here she was, hanging upside down from the rafters in an old musty barn.  The Mahwag still droning on and on, probably about killing her for her misdeeds.  
  


Honestly!  It’s not like she had even gone through with her plan yet.  He could get pissed once his ass was in jail or dead.  She didn’t really have a preference.  
  


“Allahın şirin anası!”

  
Lazily, or possibly drowsily, the whole upside-down thing was making her pretty light headed, she turned her head to look at the only other occupant of the room she gave a damn about.  Serilda was tied to another pole, but standing upright, her mouth gagged.  Arturo wanted her to watch, he wouldn’t hurt her.  He had paid too much money for his newest “wife”; had said she was the best part of his “collection”.  The thought made Alex gag.  … around her gag.  
Stupid pun, but this was boring.  
  


The solid punch to her face clued her in that she’d probably just done a very dramatic eye roll.  She laughed at her own gumption.  
  


Ok, so maybe she was also slightly intoxicated.  
  


“I have enough of you human Pişik.You are now become my enemy.I kill my enemies.”

  
The gag was probably a good idea.  Her response definitely would have gotten her hit again.  
Unfortunately, Arturo seemed to have missed the ‘safer’ memo and ripped the tape that had been binding her mouth shut, off her face.  
  


“OW!  What the fuck jerk face?!?”  She yelled, flexing her jaw, and tentatively touching her tongue to her bleeding lips. “Not cool Arturo, I thought we were friends!”  
  


The amphimorphs paper thin lips pulled back, revealing rows of needle point teeth.  
  


“Friends!? PişikYou fuck my wife!!!”

  
Oh yeah.  
  


That had happened.  
  


“Don’t take it personal, it’s just that… well… I just honestly hate you so much.”  
  


The self-satisfied smirk on her face, earned her 2 punches in quick succession.  
  


She laughed and spit out blood, body swinging, the rising sun trickling in through the beams now and intensifying her headache.  Awesome day.  
  


“You know Arturo, you should learn to control your temper.  Your punches aren’t nearly as effective when your angry.  Every good fighter knows that.”  
  


He hit her again, this time in her stomach forcing her body to curl upwards in a self-defense mechanism.  
  


Arturo shook out his hand and as she wheezed through the pain, Alex smiled at him again.  
  


“Hand hurting big boy?  These hits are getting a little weak.”  
  


The goon scowled at her and motioned one of his henchmen forward.  The guy was bigger than Arturo and was obviously the hired muscle.  Alex tried to hold in her snort of laughter when the big lug started forward and promptly tripped over his own feet.  
  


She’d just seen Zikme at dinner, she’d just seen all of them at dinner actually.  They’d broken bread, and yet they were still more peeved about her sex life, than her amazingly brilliant set up.  It had taken her 3 weeks to get this thing right!  
  


Arturo’s grey face was almost red now, meaning he was especially angry… or warm, but Mahwags were not known for their blushes or flushes so she couldn’t really tell.  
  


“Get up and end her!  Now!”  
  


Zikme wobbled to his feet before crashing into one of his fellow body men and knocking them over.  To his credit lug two had already been on his way down.  Alex laughed full body now, imagining the domino effect that could have taken place.  That would have been so awesome.  
  


“You know Arturo, when we met you asked me if I would swear my fealty to you.  I did.  Only thing is, I don’t really believe in that, so it meant nothing to me.  I didn’t care.  What I did care about was finding out all about you.”  She said, licking her lips, and staring at the back of the Mahwags head as he watched his men fall over one by one. “You, the pathetic, self-loathing egomaniac that thinks it’s okay to sell people for money, to buy people like they’re objects.  You parade them around in the nude to show off how well selected your stock is.  Thing is you might have actually gotten away with it, if it weren’t for the fact that you decided to start trading in humans.”  
  


Arturo rounded on her, grabbing her face in a not so tight grip and squeezing she was sure with all of his dwindling strength.  
  


“Those kids you rounded up?  You might have thought they were nobodies, but someone else thought different and lo and behold, your case file wound up on my desk.  I have a thing against people who abduct kids.  It’s like a twitch I just can’t kick.  I just really don’t like them, you know?”  She said conversationally, her smile predatory and stretched across her whole face and she made sure she had Arturo’s full attention.  “The best day of this year came when I learned you had skin like an amphibian, like a frog actually.  Did you know that you need water to live, like, that you would die in a dry environment?  Or if say, someone sucked all the water from the atmosphere.  I of course didn’t do that, it would definitely affect me too.  I hate nosebleeds; so messy.  BUT, luckily for us, you were a huge dick to that Tifarcian a month ago, and man can they hold a grudge. Do you know what a hygroscopic chemical is?  I told you, you should have been nicer.  The restaurant we went to tonight was owned by said Tifarcian male, and their favorite seasoning is the oil of vitriol.”  
  


The amphimorphs hand was hot on her face and she continued to smile even as he started to cough and wobble, trying and failing to squeeze her head off.  
  


“No, doesn’t sound familiar?” she asked, idly swinging her head out of his grasp and bending at the waist to use her now free hands (honestly, who had tied those ropes? A child?) to start undoing the bindings at her ankles.  “How about dihydrogen sulfate?  No?  Maybe sulfuric acid?”  This made the big oaf stumble back and away from her.  His fin hand slapping wildly at his throat.  Fin hands were so weird.  They were shaped like shark fins but maneuvered like human hands without the thumb.  She’d thought that only happened in cartoons and had ignored them due to lack of practicality.  The two months she’d spent gathering intel on the Verminian family’s slave trade business however had shown her that when a species knew how to use said fin hands, they were actually quite advantageous.  Not that she cared anymore.  
  


“Qadın itləri!”

  
“Oh no Arturo, you’re the bitch.  And you just got played.  It’s over, I know all your routes, I know all your camps, I know where your safe houses are, where your money is, your family.”  Alex twisted her body as she let herself fall to the ground, shaking the growing cobwebs out of her head.  “I know everything.  And you, you’re being cooked from the inside.  Don’t worry, I didn’t let you ingest enough to kill you, I asked that he only use the most minimum on the food tonight.  I obviously couldn’t have any, I’m very allergic to the stuff.  Most humans are, you understand.  And besides, even if your reaction is worse than I anticipate which I highly doubt since, you know, I’m like in Mensa and all, we’ll be at my base in well enough time to treat you.  Either way the next few days of your life are going to be spent shitting fire.  Literally, in your case.”  She said, as she straightened her clothes and combed a hand through her short hair.  “After that you’ll be able to spend the rest of your days thinking about the things you’ve done and the harm you’ve caused.”  
  


Arturo gargled weakly from his new position on his back.  
  


Alex walked over to him and idly pulled her phone out of his pocket, punching in her code, and swiping over to a lovely picture, if she did say so herself.  
  


“See this?  They’re safe and happy, and you sir, will never find them.  They’ll never even know you existed.  You’ll be nothing, because you are nothing.”  
  


Alex barely had time to brace herself for the surprise attack, but she was easily able to sidestep the body that had launched itself at her.  
  


“Alpha…” She stated as Arturo went careening past her.  
  


“Mike…” Her elbow, slammed into the back of the falling amphimorphs head.  
  


“Foxtrot.”  She finished, feeling immensely proud of herself as she folded her arms across her chest.  
  


She smiled victoriously as she heard the sounds of loud SUVs drive up to the barn.  
The only response she got was Arturo finally passing out and a blank look from Serilda.  
She sighed as she walked over to the beautiful woman.  “It means ‘Adios Motherfucker’… we really have to get you to a movie theater.”  
  


////

  
Hank was less than pleased.  Alex had known he was going to be but the dressing down she was currently receiving was a little unfair.  
  


“Were you even thinking with anything other than your libido Agent Danvers?”  The giant man was livid, his dark skin was actually red at this point.  Alex had to force herself to stand her ground and not take a step back from his towering figure.  “You have a DEO issued phone Agent, why wouldn’t you have used it to explain your plan, so that I could have shot it down?  What’s the point of having a phone if you’re not going to answer it?”  
  


“Sir, my plan worked.”  She argued, ignoring the part about the phone and the multiple messages that were probably waiting for her to read them.  “Serilda was an unexpected addition, but I couldn’t just leave her there--”  
  


“Oh, please Danvers!”  Henshaw’s voice was booming.  “Don’t try to make yourself out to be some sort of damn hero!  You were in that for yourself! You deliberately--”  
  


“I WAS TRYING TO SAVE HER!!!” She countered, twisting her head to glare at her superior.  
  


“DELIBERATELY!” Hank yelled over her, thrusting his index finger in her face. “Disobeyed direct orders!  Endangered the lives of civilians!  Almost got yourself killed!  And basically, screwed this mission!  The amount of cleanup we’re going to have to do on this one--” Henshaw scowled as he turned away from her, hands landing on his hips as he stared out of the bay windows overlooking the main floor.  
  


Alex shuffled her feet.  She understood why her commanding officer was pissed at her, she really did.  But her plan had worked.  He should be congratulating her, even a little, on her execution.  Everyone was safe.  There had been no collateral damage.  
  


“I was trying to save her,” she said, bringing her head up and squaring her shoulders. “Sir.”  
Hank shook his head.  “And how were you planning on doing that?  You got her away from Verminian, now what?  How is she going to support herself?  Where will she live?  Are you going to take care of her?”  
  


Alex frowned uncomfortably.  
  


“No, of course not.  You don’t do ‘attachments’, right?  Does she know that?  You don’t think Alex!” Hank exclaimed, finally turning back to face her, exasperation clear as day on his face.  “These plans of yours work, but only for you.  We had a Mahwag agent.”    
  


The color drained from Alex’s face.  
  


“You asked for backup to be ready for you in your last report so we sent in Agent Dresden to assist you, and you nearly killed him.  If you had told me your plan-- if you had even given us the _option_ to work with you on it, we could have known that sending Dresden in would be catastrophic.  I could have had someone else on hand.  I could at least have made contact with you about his identity.   _Something_ Alex; this could all have been avoided...  But you didn’t trust us.  You don’t trust anyone but yourself, and I’m supposed to trust _you?_ ”  Hank sighed in disappointment, before turning back to his desk and picking up an envelope.  He thrust the package into Alex’s hands.  “These are Serilda’s new documents.  Passport, working papers, enough money to set her up comfortably in her new home for a year if she’s smart.  Give those to her and then report to Agent Vasquez for your new assignment.  You want to act like a child, fine.  I’ll treat you like one.”  
  


And with those ominous words, Hank walked out of the room.  Leaving Alex with a queasy stomach, guilty conscience and an envelope that felt way heavier than it was supposed to.  
  
////

  
“So, Hank is pissed.”    
  


These were the first words out of Vasquez' mouth as Alex walked over to her.  
  


Alex sighed, continuing to make her way over to her fellow agent and handler.  Vasquez was standing in front of a bank of screens, tablet held loosely in the crook of her arm as she compared data and took notes.  Her posture was relaxed but Alex wasn’t fooled.  Vasquez had an innate ability to switch from her, generally laid back, character into combat mode without blinking an eye.  
  


The shorter brunette turned to face her when Alex stopped next to her, turning so that she was the one looking at the screens.  She couldn’t face Vasquez.  Not yet.  
  


“Is Dresden ok?”  
  


Vasquez shifted next to her, punching something into her tablet before offering it over to Alex.  She allowed herself to scan the data that had been presented to her, and felt both relieved and sick.  Dresden would be fine, but he’d probably be bed bound for a few days.  She clenched her jaw when she saw a wife listed under his emergency contacts.  He probably had kids too.  She was a sucker for kids.  
  


Wordlessly she handed the tablet back to Vasquez and locked her arms behind her back, standing in an ‘at ease’ pose used in the military.  
  


“Hank wants a full tox report.  On you by the way, not Dresden.  We already know what’s in his blood, he wants to know what’s in yours.”  
  


“And you?  You don’t trust me?” Alex asked, posture stiffening further as she tried to force herself to remain calm despite the rapid beating of her heart.  
“No.” Was Vasquez’s simple response.  “Not at all.  I told you months ago that you had a problem.  You ignored me.  These are the consequences.”  
  


Alex had no response to that and silently allowed Vasquez to schedule the appointment in her pad.  The Agent signed when prompted and took note that Vasquez had at least scheduled the appointment for that night.  She’d at least be able to go home and wash away some of the grime before being poked like a lab rat.  
  


“And the assignment?”  She asked, rising from her hunched over position at the tablet.  Vasquez pulled the device back towards herself, the gray metal of the Surface device gleaming in her hands.  Her fingers flew across the screen before she made quick flicking motions with her hands.  Information was thrown up onto the bank of monitors in front of them.  
  


“Meet Catherine Grant.  A few months ago, she wrote a scathing article about “alien free loaders” as she called them.  Sounds harsh but her premise was actually for allowing alien refugees into the country.  She said the governments of the world need to get with the program or continue footing the bill that the “free loaders” will inevitably cost them.”  Alex listened intently to the explanation; she had known about all of this already but watching Vasquez do the finger quotes was actually kind of funny.  “Since then she’s been inundated with threats.  We didn’t think much of it, especially since she kind of brought it on herself, but then ALFA came along.”  
Alex suddenly found herself face to monitor with an angry mob.  At first glance she thought it was a protest gone wrong, further inspection showed that it was just a senseless slaughter.  And it was two days ago.  
  


“This was two days ago.  The team, Aliens for Amnesty, have been spewing hate for months on the innerwebs.  And while they’ve been involved in petty crime they’ve been extremely active in the last few days.  This was the end result of one of their “cleanses”.”  Vasquez’s mouth pulled down into a scowl as she said the word, before bringing up another image, this one of a confidential document.  “This was intercepted by Agent Schott.  It shows that the ALFA members have had direct contact with multiple 3rd world governments where they have been granted aid in exchange for protection.  That mob scene you just witnessed?  That was American operatives being killed by telepaths and Pekifinians.  They’re systematically wiping out whoever they think is a threat.”  
  


More images, more violence.  37 unexplained deaths in the past month. Now this?  Why hadn’t they remained in the shadows?  Why show themselves now?  
  


“How does Catherine Grant fit into this?”  She asked instead.  She’d worked with Vasquez long enough to know that any information not volunteered was information Vasquez didn’t have and that Alex would have to discover herself.  
  


“That document I showed you?  She’s listed as their “main” target.  Doesn’t say whether they plan to kill her or not, or use her for their own means.  She’s just listed as a target.”  Vasquez said, a smile starting to curl on her lips.  “And you dear are her shiny new bodyguard.”  
  


“Her what now?!?”  Alex asked, her body turning of its own volition to stare incredulously at Vasquez.  
  


“Her bodyguard.”  
  


“Vasquez!”  
  
“Danvers.”  
  


“Dude! No!  This is not fair!  I fucked up, but I didn’t fuck up that--”  
  


“Dresden.”  
  


“…”  
  


“…”  
  


“When do I start?” Alex asked resignedly, shoulders slumping in and a scowl feeling like it would be permanently etched on her face.  
  


Vasquez’s amusement was palpable as she gave Alex a rundown of the case.  When she was finished she handed over another Surface tablet that she’d produced from seemingly nowhere.    
“This has all the information we have on everything relevant to the case.  You’ll report for duty at 07:00 hours on Monday morning.  Here’s your cards, ID, and contact.”  She gave Alex a bag that again she had produced from nowhere.  “And Alex there’s one more thing.” Vasquez reached out her hand to clasp it around Alex’s right bicep, tugging slightly to get the other Agent’s attention.  “I’m sorry about Serilda, I know you cared about her.  But Alex, we have a job to do and I can’t be your friend here; Hank can’t be your friend.  I know you think we’re giving you this mission as a punishment, but that’s not it.  You can’t keep going solo and being reckless.  Your life matters.  And if you ever want to find Kara--”  
  


It was like an inferno had been lit inside of her with those words; that name.  Alex jerked away from her friend a warning glare on her face as her heart beat picked up speed again.    
  


“If that’s all Special Agent then I think we’re done here.”  
  


Vasquez’s jaw clicked shut and she moved easily into attention, back straight and gaze forward.  
  


“Yes Ma’am, Assistant Director!”  
  


Alex turned and walked away, hating the sight of her friend like that but refusing to back down.  Vasquez knew better.  
  


She knew better.  
  


////

  
Water fell in stinging bullets against her skin and Alex was extremely grateful for the water pressure in her bathroom.  It was a welcome distraction, especially as Hank had ordered a tox report on her.  Asshole.  
  


She shivered as her thoughts inevitably went back to her job and to the 257 children that had been recovered from the heist.  That was 257 families that might get a happy ending.  She had searched through the report.  Had memorized every rescued person’s name.  Hers was not on it.  
  


**_ “Can you help me?”    
  
_ **

Nearly 10 years later and she still knew the sound of her voice; could still see clear blue eyes, feel soft skin.  
  


_ “ **Please**?”  
  
_

If she focused hard enough she could even hear laughter, feel the brief happiness that she had been bestowed before it had all been snatched away.  Before she lost everything.  
  


She shut off the water and stumbled, soaking wet and naked to her kitchen.  Tearing open cabinets, she searched frantically for the alcohol that would help dull the ache in her heart.  
  


“ ** _Alex_**.”  
  


The bottle of scotch smashed to ground and shattered as Alex crumbled to the ground under the onslaught of memories.    
  


**_ “I don’t wanna go.”  
  
_ **

“Stop.”  
  


“ ** _Alex_**.”  
  


She pressed her palms against her eyes, red spots flashing behind her lids and chasing away her smile, her eyes, her tears.  
  


“Please stop. Please stop. Please stop. Please stop.”  
  


“ ** _Alex_**.”  
  


~One Month Later~  
  
She couldn’t exactly blame Winn; Linda Taylor was fairly attractive.  Not in the stop-everything-hot-model-coming-through kind of way, but she definitely made you look twice.  And then keep on looking.  At first glance, you saw the blonde hair and glasses, maybe you noticed the fumbling but that was pretty much it.  The fumbling was what had made Alex curious though and then she couldn’t stop the staring, because damn; Linda Taylor was beautiful.  Not that she’d ever tell her that, especially with the way she had so thoroughly, albeit politely, shut Winn down.  The poor guy was still licking his wounds at his desk when she plopped down next to him, her senses constantly in tune with Cat Grant’s location, staring morosely at his action figures.  
  


She smirked as she pushed over his Superman figurine.  Kal-El was an ass anyway.  
  


“So, can we finally agree that you will stop trying to get laid on company time Agent Schott or do I have to sit through another display of your utter lack of game?”  She whispered to the man staring morosely at his action figures.  
  


Winn scowled at her, snatching Superman away from her destructive hands and placing him back on his pedestal.  Alex raised her eyebrows because Winn did in fact have a pedestal.  Like an honest to god glass pedestal with the name Superman etched into the front.  He was such a damn Nerd.  Yes, the capitol was needed.  
  


“I do not have a lack of game.  She’s just really busy with Ms. Grant.”  
  


Alex rolled her eyes, and leaned back casually in her chair, eye’s focused on Cat Grant and peripherals taking in the profile of one Linda Taylor.  The blonde was seated at her desk, hair pulled back tight into a pony tail.  She was wearing a pink cardigan over a blue denim dress, and her face was currently pinched in what appeared to be consternation from booking god knows what appointments for the media tycoon.  Her glasses sat perched high on her nose even as she studiously typed away at her computer, and they momentarily gave Alex pause.  Well them and the liquid brown that were her eyes.  Alex had never related to the song “brown eyed girl” more.  But back to the glasses.  Either Linda Taylor had just received these glasses or she was a one of a kind glasses owner.  Alex had had glasses growing up and she was well aware of how annoying they could be when they slipped down from where they were supposed to be.  And yet, she hadn’t seen Linda reach for her glasses once, and the bifocals had remained perfectly perched on her nose.  
  


Strange.  
  


And still hot.  
  


“You don’t want her anyway.”  
  


Winn’s head shot up and he gaped at her incredulously.  “What?! Why not? She’s great!”  
“Seriously?” Alex scoffed at his nod and turned her attention back to Linda.  “Alright fine, see how she’s sitting, she’s tense—stiff.  It means she’s always on alert, and she flinches just so when Cat yells for her.  She never stands to close to anyone, always keeps a respectful distance, even when somebody is clearly in her way.  She politely waits or moves around them.  Her finger nails are pristine, but they don’t look like they’ve been done by a professional which means she probably has a problem with people touching her.  She takes care of herself, not so good at letting other people take care of her.  She’s probably not used to that, probably been abused in some way.  That means emotional baggage.  You don’t want emotional baggage Winn.  That never ends well.”  
  


She sighed and turned back to the sulking undercover agent at her side.  
  


Winn gaped.  
  


Alex smirked.  
  


“You can’t possibly know all that just from watching her!  And also, ‘never ends well’?   Who says I want it to end?  The whole point of asking for a relationship is so that it doesn’t end.  You know ‘happily ever after’?”  Winn’s hands moved animatedly.  Alex watched, intrigued and hopeful as he came dangerously close to knocking Kal-El over again.  He missed, just barely.  Oh well, maybe next time.  
  


“Seriously?  You want a happily ever after with someone who probably cries them self to sleep?”  She crossed her arms over her chest, eye’s set in a dare.  
  


It was Winn’s turn to scoff, nervous hands pulling at his tie.  “No… yes.  Maybe!  Dude,” he argued at her chuckle.  “I’m not gonna write someone off just because they have… stuff.  You have stuff, I keep you around!”  
  


Alex smiled, affection swamping her as she tapped Winn’s knee with her shoe.  “Yeah, you’re a real American hero Romeo.  Any luck tracing that hack?”  
  


Winn frowned at the subject change but turned to his computer screen, making a few innocuous clicks with his mouse as he pulled up a series of pages.  
  


“So, as you know, CatCo experienced a pretty significant security breach last night.  I managed to shut it down before anything super important left the facility but they did manage to pull employee records: names, addresses, phone numbers, email addresses.  Nothing pertinent like socials but still enough to do some damage.  They also dipped into the financials, but they weren’t able to get anything that wasn’t public before I’d rerouted them to a dummy server and shut the real ones down.  Yeah, I am that good.”  Winn said, his hands flying across the keys, smug smirk in place.  “I’ve been trying to lock down the origin, but the IP is bouncing off a bunch of different routers.  Whoever they are they’re good.  They’ve re-routed me all across America and Eastern Europe.  Unfortunately for them, I just happen to be better.”  Here he pointed to a command console on the Monitor filled with a bunch of alpha-numeric characters, Alex nodding to say she was following.  “This is his MAC address.  Yes, I know, I impress me too.” Alex was no longer following.  “BUT the problem is even though I was able to retrace it to this really shitty iPhone, he was already in the process of wiping the damn thing.  I only got his call logs and a few incomplete photos.  I’ve got a program trying to piece the photos together but that really never works.  Unless you’re on TV or something, then magic is everywhere.  Alas Saruman, this is reality and we have to make do with what we have so in the mean time I am running traces on the numbers I pulled from his phone.  A complete trace will probably be done sometime late tonight.  Maybe longer since the boss was very clear about our incognito-ness.”  
  


A huff of air was expelled from her as she leaned back in her chair, continuing her new favorite past time of watching Cat and Linda… mostly Linda.  She had really hoped this mission would be over with soon.  As much as she respected and cared for Hank, she was not made to be anybody’s babysitter.  Trusting her with another human’s life was completely irresponsible of him.  She had a known track record of getting people killed.  
  


“Any idea how they got in?”  
  


“Well they happened to “hack” a one, James Olsen.  Not the brightest star in the sky, that one.  Looks like he likes to write his passwords on sticky notes.”  Winn said, annoyance clear in his voice.  “I can’t even suspect him of foul play because the guy really is just that dense.  I’ve never met such a smart dummy in my life.  Well, not including you.  You still reign supreme.”  
Alex kicked him in the shin without turning her attention away from the boss-assistant duo.  “So basically, what you’re saying is, Olson’s a moron, Linda’s hot, and that you and I are going to be at the bar tonight.” She took in Winn’s less than thrilled expression and smirked.  Being Winn’s wingman was always so much fun.  
  


“Awesome day.” The IT man-child mumbled.  
  
////

Alex scratched her cheek as she finished putting on her leather jacket.  Agent Marcado was waiting by the Cat’s personal elevator to see her down.  Hank had been cruel and unforgiving in his appointment of her to Cat’s personal bodyguard but he was at least wise enough to realize that if Alex had to deal with the walking ego outside of her work environment where there were many many people to offer a buffer: she’d kill them both.  Out of pure spite.  
  


Hence Agent Marcado drawing the short straw.  No dig on his height.  While she waited for Winn to finish at his desk, Alex took in the man in question.  He was fairly short, standing at just five feet and six inches, but what he lacked in height he made up for in bulk.  The man was a walking muscle house, the brown meat bags he called arms, barely restrained in the DEO issued suit he wore.  He had the look and carriage of a gym head.  Alex knew better.  She had seen the man run, and she was pretty sure that he’d been on some elite track team in his other life, not that she had asked.  Marcado was all about the job, the buzz cut and constant sunglasses a dead giveaway to anyone with eyes, and any questions into his personal life were generally ignored.  Alex understood that.  She respected that.  

She’d also had Winn “borrow” his personnel file and had seen the gruff agent with his twin daughters.  The girls looked like they were about 4 or 5 and Marcado looked like he’d won the lottery.  It was always the quiet ones.  
  


She was pulled from her reverie by Linda Watch.  The blonde was rushing behind Cat as the CEO strode purposefully towards her private elevator (what a joke), voicing her wishes in that quickfire speech that even Alex had trouble keeping up with.  Linda, though she did admittedly stumble once or twice, handled it all in stride.  One of her arms cradled a notebook across her torso while the other moved rapidly across the page.  Alex was sure she heard every word Cat uttered, even as the media Queen stepped onto the elevator with a jaunty “and don’t screw anything up Lidia!” line.  
  


Then she was gone and the office breathed a collective sigh of relief.  
  


And that wasn’t just Alex being a brat, the entire office staff literally exhaled and released the tension of being on constant lookout for the next Catherine Grant temper tantrum.  Was it hard to believe that Alex really could not stand the woman?  Especially when she saw how Linda’s shoulder’s slumped and she stiffly made her way back to her desk.  
  


“Hey, everything ok?”  
  


Alex had made her way over to the assistant’s desk without even realizing it.  She just knew that Linda shouldn’t look so disappointed, no matter how brief the flash of emotion had been.  Alex had seen it and she didn’t like it.  Apparently having “stuff” was fine or whatever.  
  


Screw Winn and his stupid insights.  
  


The blonde startled at the new voice and brown eyes jumped up to meet hers, before hesitantly looking over her shoulder as if Alex were referring to someone who was not her.  
  


“Linda?”  She leaned forward, placing her hands on the desk in front of her and ducked her head to meet to blonde’s eyes.  “Are you ok?”  She could feel Winn’s eyes burning into the back of her skull and studiously chose to ignore him.  
  


“OH!  Yes!  I am… um… Yes... Agent Danvers? Yes, I’m fine.  Thank you.”  She abruptly cut herself off, an embarrassed flush overwhelming her cheeks and her hands coming up to fidget with her glasses.  The movement was odd, not practiced per se but not … natural.  It was like she was unsure of her own body, and she had an amazing body so Alex was sure it wasn’t some “awareness” issue.  Maybe a carryover from her childhood?  Abuse or bullying would bring that behavior out.  “Um… did you need anything?  Agent Danvers ma’am?  Or Miss? Or Mrs.! I’m not trying to imply that you aren’t married!  I just didn’t see a ring so I assumed-- Not that I checked!  I just noticed—I--”  
  


Alex chuckled at the babbling that overtook the blonde.  At least that didn’t seem false.  Alex had no doubt that Linda’s brain worked way faster than anyone’s oratory skills would be able to handle.  She held up a hand to halt Linda’s momentum before she gave herself a conniption.  
  


“I recently made friends with Winn, you’re IT guy?”  She leaned back, angling her body so that Linda could look past her to the man in question.  “He lets me sit at his desk which has a great view of your boss Bellatrix, AND he shares his twizzlers.  We were gonna grab dinner at this nice bar I know.  It’s low key and the music sucks, but the burgers are literally to kill for.”  She smiled at the thought of the food she was going to consume, before realizing that Linda had yet to answer her.  The agent looked back down into a confused face.  
  


“I shouldn’t, my boss, um her name is Cat by the way, she really needs me to move some stuff around for her.  Also, I don’t really eat meat.”  
  


No way was this happening.  
  


“Linda, you have read Harry Potter, right?  Boy Wizard?”  She glossed straight over the whole meat thing, maybe Linda and Maggie could form a club.  Linda’s blank stare nearly sent Alex into a panic.  “Cupboard under the stairs?  Hermione Granger?  Ronald Weasley?”  Her hands made frantic gestures as she begged the universe to make this all a big misunderstanding.  Alex wasn’t passionate about much in life, but there were things that were sacred.  The first being alcohol, then sex, and then Harry Potter.  Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Star Wars rounding out the hand.  
  


“Um… are these people fictional or your friends?”  
  


“BOTH!”  
  


Alex’s shout drew the attention of most of the remaining employees, but she didn’t care.  “How long will the rest of your work take you?”  
  


“Um… an hour maybe?”  
  


“Good!  Winn and I will wait for you, won’t we Winn?”  The tech genius startled at being acknowledged and opened his mouth to reply but Alex was already answering for him.  “See? Winn said yes.  We’re gonna wait right here until you’re done and then we are going to Python’s Tavern for dinner.  You’re about to be nerdified.”  
  


Linda was now sporting a look that was a cross between confusion and amusement.  Confusement.  Trademark Pending.  
  


She really needed to get out more.  
  


“Ok.” Was the simple response.    
  


Maybe the day wouldn’t be such a bust after all.  No offense to him but killing time with Winn usually ended in an Angel vs. Spike showdown and she was way too tired for that tonight.  Linda could be their buffer, and a pretty face.  Hopefully good conversation too.  
  


The blonde smiled up at her before ducking her head back down to her work.  Alex smirked back and dragged Winn back to his desk to wait.  This was going to be interesting.  
  


////  
  
In hindsight, Alex probably should have warned Linda that it was trivia night at Python’s.  True to her word the blonde had wrapped up her work in 50 minutes, and had quickly gathered her things.  Another tick that Alex filed away, this girl had definitely had jerk experience.  Of course, that didn’t necessarily mean she was hiding an abusive boyfriend, Alex had checked and the woman held no bruises or other markings on her flawless skin.  
  


“C’mon.  There’s a table over there.” Winn said over the low hum of the crowd, his finger pointing towards a table towards the back and effectively jerking Alex’s eyes away from said flawless skin.    
  


Geez, she really needed to get her shit together.  She gave Linda a tight smile and gestured for her to go in front of her.  When they were finally seated and had disposed of their outerwear, Alex decided to go back into her “fuck up” mode.  People were always so much more relaxed around silly fuck ups.  
  


“Thanks for coming out with us.  I would have been bored out of my mind with just Winn here.”  
  


“Hey!” The affronted Nerd shoved her shoulder from his seat next to her.  Alex gave Linda a wounded look, rubbing her shoulder to complete the act.  
  


“Always so violent this one.”  She said, sending a pout in Linda’s direction.  Going for maximum sympathy points.  And Linda did look sympathetic.  And amused.  But it wasn’t real.  Alex couldn’t put her finger on it, but there was definitely something off with this girl.  Another quirk of Alex’s?  Mysteries.  She couldn’t stand leaving them unsolved.  And as long as she was doing nothing…  
  


“So, Linda,” She started, balancing her weight on her arms as she leaned across the table.  “When and why did you start working for Bellatrix?”  
  


Winn snorted into the water he’d just started to drink, water shooting out of his nose into his cup and onto his shirt.  
  


“Shit.” He muttered, grabbing a handful of napkins, and rushing off to the restroom.    
  


The puddle of water and snot he’d left behind quickly being wiped up with a washrag as one of the servers came over.  Alex watched the lady clean up the mess and wondered how many other tables would be treated to bleach, water, and snot cleanings.  
  


“Gross.  Anyway, back to us.” She smiled back at Linda, and ignored the germaphobia that was threatening to unleash itself.  
  


Linda was smiling, clear amusement on her face.  Real amusement this time.  What a puzzle.  
“I started working for Ms. Grant about 3 months ago.  And the why is simple.  I needed the money.”  She said, curling her hand around her own water and pulling it close as she peered back down at the menu in front of her.  “What about you?  When and why did your top-secret agency start?”  
  


Officially, Alex had signed on as an agent of the FBI who was providing bodily support for Ms. Grant in the event of a terror attack.  She was gathering any and all intel possible to prevent said attack.  It was very close to the truth.  
  


Unofficially, she was a DEO agent tasked with figuring out the plan of alien terrorists in conjunction with foreign human governments and stop global genocide before it started.  Oh, and keep Catherine Grant alive if at all possible.  Greater good and all that.  
  


“I was recruited in college.  Best and brightest.  They actually had one of those booths and I signed my name for more information.  They looked at my school records and offered me an internship.  Aced that, and moved up the ranks to Catherine Grant’s bodyguard.” She said, only a trace of bitterness coating her final words.  It was at that point that the waiter came and took their orders.  Alex placing Winn’s usual for when he finally got over his embarrassment and decided to show face again.  
  


“It sounds really cool.”  Linda said, after the waitress had left their table.  “Working for the FBI.  Very clandestine and hard core.”  
  


Alex shrugged non- committedly.  “It has its good days and its bad days.”  She reached up and tugged on her ear, glancing up at Kara before giving herself a mental shake.  “Which I’m sure you know, working for Cat Grant and all.”  
  


Linda laughed, and the sound was both light and genuine.  A fact that seemed to surprise the blonde as well, if the way she placed her hand over her mouth was any indication.  
  


“She’s honestly not that bad.”  Linda stated, pulling her bottom lip between her teeth, and ducking her head.  “She’s really actually very nice when you get to know her.  She seems harsh but she’s really… well she’s harsh but in a good way.  Like how I imagine overbearing mothers to be.”  
  


“Ah.  You had a good mother than?”  Alex asked, a teasing smile on her lips as she brought her newly arrived beer to her lips.  
  


Linda shook her head, her smile becoming slightly forced.  “I did.  I had an amazing mother… but…”  She shrugged and glanced away.  
  


“Shit.  Linda, I’m so sorry.  I didn’t know… I--”  
  


Linda’s eyes snapped back to her, throwing Alex a look of befuddlement.  “Alex it’s fine.  Of course, you didn’t know.  We’ve only just started talking.  Besides I’m hardly the only person in the world who has experienced pain.”  Linda’s expression was kind and for a second Alex considered holding her hand, but then thought better of it.  Hank had trusted this to her, no matter how much of a shitty assignment as this was, she wouldn’t screw it up by… well, screwing it up.       
  


“Yeah, I guess you’re right.  Still I didn’t mean to dredge up bad memories.  I know what that’s like, I want to punch something anytime I see the stupid justice league.”    
  


Linda’s eyebrows shot up. “You don’t like “earth’s mightiest heroes”?  Are you a cyborg?  Do you secretly wish death on kittens and small animals?” She asked playfully with an intrigued smile at her lips.  
  


Alex snorted and took another pull of her beer.  “It’s not so much the hero bit as it is the asshole entitlement part.  If you’re ‘gifted’ than you should be helping, 100% of the time or shutting the hell up.  There’s no in between. No leeway. No 50/50. Anything else is reckless and should be punished.”  
  


“You don’t sound too fond of people with abilities.  Aren’t people supposed to fawn and do the whole hero worship thing?  I mean, you talk about them like they should all be locked up.”  
  


The brunette rolled her shoulders, mouth twisting into a grim line as she remembered her failures. “I’m not saying they’re evil, I just know that super powered people never did me any favors.”  
  


Linda tilted her head in amusement, and Alex was sure now that not all of her movements were genuine.  They were what she thought Alex wanted to see.    
  


“That’s a little arrogant.  I wasn’t aware that that was in their job description.  ‘Super Powered People’, addendum: ‘must do favors for one Miss Alexandra Danvers’.”  
  


Heat flooded Alex’s cheeks even as she let out an unexpected laugh at Linda’s words.  Those at least had been her own.  She pulled her right hand away from where she had been cradling her beer and face palmed, her chuckles still reverberating through her body.  
  


“Oh god!  Please do not call me that.  Only my mother calls me Alexandra, and only when I’m in trouble.  So, you know, like 90% of the time.”  
  


Linda’s answering smile was beatific.  And it was here that Alex realized how thoroughly she had been played.  She’d asked about Miss Grant, had been trying to get information into why anyone would target the Media icon aside from her amazing personality.  Linda had not only side stepped her question, but had gained her own intel on Alex.  The grin on her face was definitely starting to feel like it was permanently etched in.  She raised her beer with her left hand, her right remaining pasted to her cheek.  
  


“Touché, Linda Taylor.  You are a worthy opponent.  I can see why Cat values you so much.”  
The self-satisfied smile she received told her she was in way over her head.  Which was fine.  
  


Alex hated playing it safe.   __

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, and now we move on... got some more plot build. We're get more exciting stuff next chapter and a lot of questions you have should be answered. :)
> 
> Also, you're not supposed to know exactly what Arturo's saying. Alex doesn't know, so neither do we. You can draw assumptions some times though. :)
> 
> ~Chronicles.


	3. All My Sins Need Holy Water (Feel It Washin Over Me)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Some graphic depictions of violence in this chapter.
> 
> Beta'd by Keziah, who somehow gets my jokes and thinks they're funny. And my sister told me to keep my day job-- HA! I'm takin this act of the road!
> 
> Song: Eminem- River

** All My Sins Need Holy Water (Feel It Washin Over Me) **

When Winn finally came back Alex had been quick to tease the man about his still damp clothing. Linda personally didn’t see why he had stayed. He was clearly in need of new clothing, yet he had returned to the table after having removed his blue and white striped button down. This left him in a plain black cotton shirt and his gray slacks. The ensemble left him looking childish and Linda made sure she kept her timid smile in place, even though internally she was frowning. Humans were so weird.  

“How do you feel about “The Gentlemen” as our team name?” Alex asked. She was still smiling, but Linda had been in tune with the woman’s heartbeat for near a month now, and she knew when Alex was relaxed, and Alex was not relaxed. No, she was … having fun… excited even.

“That’s fine. I’ve never really seen this show, so I won’t be much help anyway.” Linda said, thinking back on their previous conversation.

After Alex had acknowledged that Linda had a brain, and that maybe she was a little out of her depth, they had settled into a conversation about Trivia night. Linda had never been to one of these before. She had seen them in movies and on television, but her job wasn’t exactly known for allowing her to socialize much. As such, Alex had launched into the rules and how-tos of Trivia, and given her a brief but detailed description of the show Buffy the Vampire Slayer. She couldn’t say she was very excited to play, but this is what ‘socializing’ entailed, so she had to do it. Besides sometimes being cooped up in her apartment made her feel like she was in a cell.

Winn and Alex high fived over their new team name, just as the waitress came over with their orders. The announcer started talking about the trivia after that and Kara tried to immerse herself in the event. It was loud, and people were obnoxious, but Alex had been right, the food was amazing. She’d ordered the veggie kabobs and French fries, and had been pleasantly surprised with her meal. Not that it took much to please her, but this was exceptionally good.

When it was over, a little under an hour later, “The Gentlemen” had won the first-place prize of the night, a gift certificate to the same bar. Alex and Winn were thrilled, Linda was just confused, but pleased that her new friends were enjoying themselves. The night took a left turn when they were leaving the bar. Linda was walking a little behind Alex, who had a hand on the younger woman’s arm to keep track of her in the crowded bar. Winn was in front of both of them, and he and Alex were keeping up an animated conversation about Buffy and the merits of the characters Spike and Angel. While Kara had never seen the show, she had to side with Alex based on the conversation she was hearing. Angel was a tool, and this Spike seemed to at least know what he wanted and was willing to go after it. She was musing over whether human vampires could have actually even existed when she saw Winn make a particularly wide swing of his arm just as a tall muscular man was entering their path. The man’s eyes had been on Linda, so to be fair he hadn’t been looking where he was going but regardless, Winn’s hand had made contact and the man easily towered over him by at least half a foot. Linda was very aware of where this was heading and halted her forward momentum at the same time Alex did.

“Oh shit. I am so sorry man! I didn’t see you. I--”

Winn’s sentence was cut off by Brutus, Linda had decided that was a good name for him,   shoving him solidly in the chest.

“The fuck do you think you’re doing little man? Watch where your fucking going.”

Winn went silent, nervously adjusting his clothing and nodding in assent.

“What’s wrong little man? Cat got your tongue?”

Another shove from Brutus had him scrambling for his balance and almost knocking into a server with a fully loaded tray. Luckily, Linda had seen the accident about to happen and was able to catch him and pull him away from the disaster.

It also seemed that Alex had had enough. In the time it had taken for Linda to intercept Winn, she had apparently slammed Brutus into a table, holding him in place on his face by bending his wrist at a decidedly painful angle.

“Easy big guy. We’re all friends, here right?” Alex asked, even as she bent Brutus’ hand further back. The man squealed and tried to buck her off, but Alex just smirked as her body easily flowed with his. “My friend apologized to you, but you were a bit of an asshole to him. Which is fine, I’ve been hit by him too. He’s got pointy elbows, shit hurts, I get it. But then you went and put your hands on him, and see I just can’t let that be ok. Then all the other assholes out there will think it’s ok to pick on people who can’t defend themselves. I’d be responsible for an asshole uprising. That’s just absurd.  So, I hope you understand that I have to do this.” She said, moving her right hand to grab onto Brutus’ captured thumb. Leaning forward over the man’s back she spoke lower, though Linda could still hear her. “That’s my little brother you piece of shit, you really messed with the wrong person tonight.” 

Linda was sure that her hand on Alex’s arm was the only thing that saved Brutus’ fingers. She wasn’t even aware why she had moved so quickly to stop the assault in front of her. Just that they were starting to draw a crowd. And Linda hated crowds, all the attention tended to make her nervous. Alex stilled and glared down at her hand, as if daring Linda to try to stop her.

“Alex--” she started. Only to be interrupted by a shrill beep coming from Alex’s hip. The agent cursed, dropping Brutus harshly to the ground as she pulled her phone from her hip. She looked at the screen, up at Winn, back to her phone, and then ran out of the bar.

Linda blinked in confusion. Alex Danvers was really weird.  

//

When Alex finally reached Cat’s evening Yoga Class, she was adrenaline packed and sweaty. She heard the commotion taking place from the block and watched as people ran from the entry way. It had taken her 7 minutes to get here which meant the attack had been happening for at least 10. Quickly she leaped off her bike, ditching her helmet, and jumped over a police barricade to run into the building. A shadow crossed her vision and she had just enough time to duck under the arm that was aimed for her head; not enough to do the same for the foot that slammed into her back and sent her flying into a supplies closet.

Dazed, she glanced up from her position on the floor to the obscenely muscled figure towering over her. Clearly a male and growling at her, she tried to force her mind to get over the fact that there was a mop on her head and that her foot was trapped in a bucket to focus on more pressing matters like staying alive.

Big Dumb Alien Guy, or Gary as Alex was going to call him, opened his maw, and roared at her, showing off two extremely large, yellowed incisors; the volume of which drove her back. She slammed her hands over her ears, kicking out with her trapped foot and slamming the bucket into his rib cage. Gary, the little fucker, didn’t even flinch. Just kept up the incessant roar.

And then Gary and his roar were suddenly gone; vanished. No explanation, just gone. Alex wasn’t complaining. Maybe Winn had worked out how to actually “beam” creatures up. She doubted it but she really wasn’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth. She also wasn’t going to charge headfirst into the fray a second time. That was seriously dangerous. Who knew?

Hopefully Hank never found out about it.

Shucking the mop and other cleaning supplies that had toppled onto her, she quietly crept to the door and peaked around the corner. About 5 alien soldiers stood before partially broken elevator doors. Probably waiting for Cat to emerge. Dumb; the woman was obnoxious but even she would know not to take the elevator in case of emergency.

And even Alex was woman enough to admit that she wasn’t getting past those guys with just her hands and her guns. A plan formed in her brain that she just knew Hank would disapprove of. Quickly she gathered the supplies she needed just as her phone buzzed in her pocket.

“Danvers.” She whispered into the receiver as she righted the bucket in the sink, carefully measuring out the betadine and chlorine.  

“We’ve got your heat signature on the 1st floor, and Cat’s on the 4th. What’s happening Danvers?” Hank’s voice came over strong and clear. So much for him not knowing “the plan: name pending”.

“I’m in a supplies closet.” She said, slowly dipping a rolled piece of paper towel into the smoking mixture and placing it into a sawed-off soda can with a bunch of thumb tacks. “There are at least 5 unfriendlies guarding the way upstairs. I’m staging a diversion; give me 30 seconds.” The can fitted easily into the nozzle of the fire extinguisher and she carefully maneuvered her ‘weapon’ over to the doorframe.

There was a pause on the other end of the line before Hank spoke again. “Danvers, what exactly are you planning?”

Alex shrugged, almost dropping the phone from where it rested between her shoulder and ear. “Just you know, if we have any assets in here besides me, you might want to tell them to duck.”

“What--”

The explosion was a lot noisiernosier than she thought it would be, and she definitely felt one of the tacks embed itself into her skin before she managed to duck back behind the doorway. That was probably nothing though compared to what happened to the bad guys. She could hear them screaming from where she was hiding.

Moving quickly, she sprang from the room, leapfrogging over one of the aliens (a Miderian by the looks of it), and crashing into the door to the stairwell. She took the steps 3 at a time, wishing she still had her phone, which she had lost in the damn explosion. That sucked! Hank was definitely going to be pissed. Number one rule: never lose your coms, she thought as she finally reached the 4th floor. It was easy to find Cat’s team after that. The normally unfazed woman was paler than normal, her lips tight lines and her arms crossed tightly over her Lulu Lemon yoga ensemble.

Alex crossed the room without even looking at her, stopping in front of an injured Marcado. The stocky agent was sweaty and bleeding but standing upright and alert. Quickly assessing his injuries, she deemed him fit for duty and quickly placed her hand on his shoulder.

“Are you fit?” At the man’s nod she continued. “I need your spare earpiece. We’ve got a whole swarm of hostiles downstairs and we’re gonna need to get gone before they get up here.”

Winn’s voice crackled to life as she fit the small device in her ear.

“I’ve arrived on scene. I’ve got eyes on the building, NCPD has it blocked off, looks like the hostiles are taking cover in the building. Mean’s they definitely intend to end this tonight.”

Alex stored that information away as she quickly grabbed Cat and brought her over to Marcado. Not slowing she grabbed the other agent’s arm and continued speaking. “You’re with Cat the whole way got it? She doesn’t leave your side. There’s a team en-route. Meet them at rally point.”

“What the hell are you on about Danvers?” Marcado scowled, shoving her hand off his shoulder and stopping their forward momentum towards the windows.

Alex ignored him, pulling the fire hose from the wall as she glanced back at Cat. “You base jumped Kilimanjaro, right?”

Cat looked from her to the hose, to Marcado. Back to the hose.

Man, these people were slow. She heard movement in the stairwell and hastily put “the plan: name pending” into action by shoving Cat at Marcado. Movement out of the corner of her eye had her quickly tugging the woman back and into her arms, pushing them both to the floor and covering the CEO with her body.

The smell of burning flesh reached her nose and she looked up to see Marcado still standing… sans head. 

He had kids.

Marcado had fucking kids.

More movement brought her eyes over to the attacker. The figure was covered head to toe in black army gear. Silver gleamed in the shape of a hand from their left sleeve, and while one eye shone blue through the eye slit in their mask, the other was red and surrounded by metal. Was this a fucking robot?!?!

The robot alien thing, turned away as Marcado’s smoking corpse hit the floor and met Alex’s eyes before turning and running through the studio to the stairwell, Alex caught a glimpse of her (definitely female, those breasts do not lie) running up, before she was pulling Cat up off the ground and yelling into her earpiece.

“Agent down. We have an Agent down on the fourth floor. Schott, I need you to pick up the package and get her to the base, I’m sending her down now.”

Mass confusion reached her ears through the coms as everyone vied to ask where, when, and—

“What?!? Alex! What do you mean sending her down?!?!? Alex--”

She quickly tied the hose around Cat’s waist, hearing more commotion on the roof. Cat was looking at her with steel in her eyes when Alex handed her the fire nozzle and then pushed her out the window. Surprisingly it wasn’t Cat who screamed. Winn’s shriek was very distinctive.

“I’m in pursuit.” She said, turning and running back towards the sounds of fighting coming from the upper floor.

Crashing into the stairwell, she gave time to wonder if her team had finally engaged with the hostiles downstairs. The lower floors were all quiet, but Alex couldn’t focus on that right now. If her team had arrived then that probably meant that that was them getting slaughtered upstairs. She shoved her shoulder into the roof access door, gun drawn and aimed as she again locked eyes with the robot alien thing. Rat. The fucking thing was going to be known as a damn rat from now on.

The Rat eyed her dismissively before turning and taking off across the roof, leaving a heap of dead bodies in its wake. Alex didn’t take the time to check them, choosing instead to follow the rodent when she jumped roofs. The brunette tucked her legs under her, turning her fall into a roll and springing to her feet again to continue the chase. The Rat had landed feet first without slowing.

They continued this for 5 more buildings before Alex had finally had enough. She leapt across the gap between buildings, rolling into her landing and pulling her gun, which had miraculously stayed in her hand, and fired 3 shots at the assailants back. She hated having to make such a decision. She hated killing. But Marcado had had fucking kids. What right did this Rat have to take his life?

She stood feet planted and arms out, completely assured of her victory in the milliseconds after she’d fired her weapon.

Except that was when the Rat became even more annoying.

She turned, almost looking annoyed and… shimmered? It was a second. Barely there but the air around her had definitely gone wavy. And then her arm was out and she was holding a motherfucking bullet pinched between her pointer finger and thumb. In her human looking hand. Like she’d caught the damn thing!

Her metal hand released the other two bullets out of her clenched fists and yeah… she was undeniably annoyed.

Her robot eye glowed for a second and Alex was sure she was going to be toast. She was in the middle of an open roof, no cover in site. She had nowhere to run. Hank was going to kill her.

…And then the Rat simply seemed to lose interest. Her head cocked to the side slightly and Alex was sure she was scowling under that mask, before she gave up on the running bit and shot into the sky. Like flew. The fucking robot alien thing flew!

Once she was out of sight, the voices that had been yelling at Alex over coms finally reached her consciousness.

“Agent Danvers Report Now!”

Dammit. Hank did not sound happy. Maybe the Rat should have killed her.

She turned and threw up what was left of her dinner.

“You had one job Alex! One damn job! Keep Cat Grant safe!” Director Henshaw’s voice was booming, and it took a lot for her not to flinch every time he circled around to her front. Hank liked to circle his prey. “Instead you AGAIN disobeyed direct orders and chased after a hostile alien! DO YOU THINK?!?! HAVE YOU LOST ALL SENSE OF SELF PRESERVATION AND SANITY?!?!”

Her eyes twitched when he started actually yelling. The man was loud and he was pissed. And ok, maybe “the plan: name pending” hadn’t worked like he might have wanted. BUT, Cat was safe. Winn had gotten her out. The woman was currently in her penthouse, probably having a stiff glass of scotch and a Xanax for her nerves.

They were currently at Alex’s National City apartment, and Hank was giving her a solid dressing down while she stood at attention in the middle of her living room.

Hank continued yelling but Alex’s mind was on that last alien, the Rat. The woman had been on the taller side, at least 5’8”, Caucasian from the looks of it, although the slant of her human eye was slightly exotic. But she’d been somebody’s experiment. Possibly even her own. Which meant that they had a whole other problem on their hands. Either ALFA, or another group, was experimenting on humans, and from what Alex had seen tonight, they’d been largely successful.

The woman had been fast, fast enough to catch bullets with her bare hands. She had a damn laser eye, and apparently, she could fly. Or at least jump really far. She was also clearly a skilled fighter to have taken on all of those goons without breaking a sweat.

She was pulled out of her line of thinking when she realized that Hank had stopped speaking and was looking at her with his usual stoic expression.

“Sir. Sorry Sir. I was cataloguing as many details about the female hostile as I could remember sir. I was also listening sir. I know that on paper it says--” At Hank’s glare she stopped. Right, she could never bullshit Hank. “Marcado didn’t deserve that Sir.” She said, squaring her shoulders. If she was going to be punished, she’d at least lay everything on the table. “He had kids; a family. He was a good man, and a better agent. I should have seen what was happening, you taught me to--”

“I didn’t teach you to play God Alex.” Hank sighed, his hands leaving their position across his chest to rest on his hips. The large man shook his dark head, “you are not perfect Alex. No one expects you to be perfect except you. All I’m asking is that you do your damn job. That you trust me when I ask you to do something. When have I ever given you an order that you couldn’t live with? That purposely required you to sacrifice yourself or a fellow man? That was meant to hurt you?”

Her eyes burned at the softer tone Hank’s voice had taken. This wasn’t about trust. She trusted Hank with her life. This was not about trust. She wanted to say that. To tell him that he was one of the few people she had left that she could trust, but her throat wouldn’t work past the lump that had formed.

“The only person who is punishing you is you Alex.” Hank continued, placing a hand on her shoulder and squeezing slightly. “Take the night, you’re back with Cat in the morning. Agent Jones will take over for Marcado.”

He moved past her to the door, Alex unable to move to guide him out.

“And Alex, if you pull another stunt like that, you’re suspended.”

//

Kara was no stranger to pain. She’d been living with it for the past 5 years of her life. Lillian Luthor had been ecstatic when her son had finally learned of a way to harm Kryptonians. Kara had been devastated. Lillian had been like a kid in a candy shop.

So, no, pain was not new to her. It didn’t make it any easier to bear.

“You should have left that DEO agent a cripple. This operation is too sensitive to have her team mucking things up.” Lillian’s voice was soothing in her haze. Her voice usually meant a reprieve, no matter how brief. Lillian liked to be heard, she couldn’t exactly be heard over Kara’s screams, now could she?

The older woman slowly traced her hand down the side of her Kara’s face, a look of disappointment stretched across her features.

“I knew her.” Was what Kara said. Because it was true. She had known that agent. She’d been with her somewhere…

“She is a DEO agent!  She kills your kind; imprisons them for life, sees them as little more than rodents.  Or have you forgotten your training?”

Kara raised her eyes to Lillian’s, imploring her to understand the conflict surging through her.  Lillian was good at fixing Kara, she’d helped her through more than her fair share of traumas.  

“But I knew her...” 

Lillian rolled her eyes and turned to her lab tech.

“You said you fixed that.”

The man blanched, fumbling with papers and a useless explanation. Lillian respected results, not excuses.

“Fix it.” The woman seethed. “She’s not just an assassin anymore, I need her to retain everything. Wipe what you don’t need and start over.”

“Yes ma’am.” The technician said, fingers moving over the screen of their tablet. A surge of pain washed through Kara, making her grit her teeth as her back arched off the table. A scream made its way out of her clenched lips and it felt like someone was squeezing her brain through a tube.

And then suddenly it was gone. Her chest heaved as her body tried to make sense of the sudden sensory overload as it always did. Pain. No Pain. Pain. No Pain. For 6 years.

“K-2S0  , why did you hesitate? Why didn’t you finish what you started once you had secured your package?”

“I didn’t.” She gasped, fingers clenching as she tried to control her body’s spasms. “I didn’t secure the package. There were too many of them. I was breaking through the hostiles; Agent Danvers broke through the bottom floor and secured the package. She pursued me after I eliminated her partner.”

Lillian hummed, and although Kara couldn’t see her face through her closed eyes, she knew the woman was wearing an impressed expression.

“Agent Danvers broke through those Miderian and Alperas? By herself?” She mused, continuing after Kara’s affirmation. “Very interesting. I would have thought those alien lovers at the DEO would have neutered such violent tendencies. K-2S0 change your tertiary directive . I want you to get close to Agent Danvers; I want to know everything about her. You will befriend her, gain her trust; you will do whatever you need to win her to your side. Am I understood?”

“But--”

She didn’t even have time to scream this time, her entire body bowing off the bed, arms and legs fighting against their restraints, veins bulging with green. She couldn’t breathe.

She couldn’t breathe.

Lillian’s sigh was the first thing she heard over her own ragged sobs and thundering heart. The woman peered down at her, her eyes searching. Slowly she moved closer to the table, leaning over her subject with a calculating gaze.

“I don’t do well with insubordination K-2SO. Do you understand your directives as they have been given to you?”

Kara nodded hastily, unwilling to undergo more pain for something so trivial.

Lillian smiled, looking down at Kara and patting her cheek. “Make me proud.”

Something was shoved into Kara’s mouth and she tried to brace for the inevitable but the white-hot fire that coursed through her still took her breath away; still made her scream. 

When it was over, Kara was led back to her quarters. The aftermath was always difficult. Her limbs would normally twitch for at least an hour, and her powers were much harder to control. The latter was solved by having artificial kryptonite emitters built into the walls of the prison cells.

Project CADMUS was a huge facility and it catered to all walks of life. Electricity based aliens were kept in cages made of water. Aliens that thrived in water were kept near electricity. The chambers of each species were marked with their weaknesses, allergies, and ailments. A tablet outside the door of the glass cages allowed the lab techs, doctors, investors, and guards to keep an eye on the captives.

The fortress that was CADMUS was near impenetrable. The facility lay somewhere in Alaska and Kara knew from experience that on the ground levels it looked like an actual research facility. Half of the employees weren’t even aware of what really went down on the lower floors. Once you went passed level B4, you reached a clearance level that the attorney general would be jealous of. That’s where they kept their pet subjects. The more dangerous you were considered, the lower the level. Kara was kept on the bottom floor, B36; roughly 14,000 feet below earth’s surface.

In her earlier days she had hated the drab slabs of concrete, now making it back to her cell meant she was still breathing. That counted for a lot.

The guard on her left swiped their badge at her cell door, waited for the biometric scans to confirm her identity and then pushed her into the cage. The glass panel slid closed behind her, flashing blue before a solid green glow lit up the area. She was used to the energy drain now, and didn’t even flinch at the activation of the kryptonite.

Rolling her shoulders, the Kryptonian moved towards the bed on the far end of her 10’x15’ room . Sinking into the grey bedsheets, she took a second to wish she was back in the apartment she’d been staying at while working for Cat.  CADMUS had allowed her to stay at the apartment to keep her cover, but they weren’t above keeping her for a night or two for evaluations.  Ms. Grant had personally selected what she’d called a “starter” apartment for   Kara.

“I like knowing that you’ll have no excuse to be late Luna.” 

Kara smiled at the memory. She wondered how Cat would react if she knew she had given Kara   the first bed she’d owned since leaving Krypton. Probably look at her as even more of a nuisance.

A violent shiver coursed through her, and she pulled her legs up to her chest to try to control the next tremor.  It didn't work.  It never worked.  The tremors would last well into the night, until she’d eliminated the excess Kryptonite and her nervous system had a chance to recover.  In the meantime, she’d have to content herself by pressing her forehead into her knees and thanking Rao that at least she hadn’t been thrown in isolation.  The walls down there were not made of glass; they slanted in from all sides, reminding Kara sharply of her pod.  

She exhaled slowly at the mere thought, trying to quell the pain in her chest and the way her throat was threatening to close.  She raised her head, staring at the glass across from her and forcing her mind to accept that, trapped as she was, she was not in the phantom zone.  She was not in her pod.

She squeezed her legs tighter to her chest.

Another reminder; she hadn’t had room to do this in her pod.  

A rapid tapping pulled her attention to the glass wall closest to her feet. Katu giggled at her from the other side, wiggling her fingers in an excited hello and obviously ignoring the clear signs of pain Kara was exhibiting. That was another fun thing about CADMUS. Not only did you not have privacy from the employees, you also had none from your cellmates. Between each prison was a clear wall of glass. The only solid barriers were the ones against the back walls.  

“Hey Pumpkin!!! How was work?”

Kara sighed and rolled over to face the exuberant red head, affection rushing to her at the sight of Katu’s happy face. The woman was young, Kara suspected somewhere in her late twenties as her dark skin remained unblemished, but Katu’s wisdom and streetwise advice had saved Kara on more than one occasion. Kara had been at CADMUS for almost 10 years now, and the most important lesson she’d learned was: enjoy the little things. Like your best friends smile.

“Work was fine.” She said as she struggled to a sitting position. She again wrapped her arms around her knees, resting her head on them as she regaled Katu with the details of her day. Katu didn’t get out much, not anywhere near as much as Kara did. They didn’t have any leverage on her, not like they did Kara. And Katu hated playing by the rules. As such she was marked as ‘experiment only’ which meant they just tested all their concoctions on her before giving them over to the military. It was such shit.

“Whaddaya mean you let her live?” Katu exclaimed, removing herself from her extremely uncomfortable looking yoga pose.

Kara rolled her eyes. “She likes Harry Potter or whatever.” She said, fingers twitching despite the white knuckled fists she was making. “I don’t know. I just… I didn’t see the point. What in the world are you doing?”

Katu smiled from her inverted position.

“I call this the “reason guys stand behind girls in line” sutra.” She said with her signature giggle. The acrobat deftly moved from the insane position into a well-executed roll, coming to stop cross-legged in front of her neighbor. Katu had always been especially bendy, having started her life out in a circus. She was heavier than what many would consider a ‘normal’ gymnast, but Kara knew that the extra weight did nothing to hinder her friend. “Listen Hun. I get it. I do. You see a cute face and you wanna keep seeing that cute face, maybe ride it all the way to the floating eye in the sky,” here Katu visibly had to shake herself out her self-induced fantasy, “but you don’t wanna go back to Kitchen Duty. Trust me. Nobodies tongue is worth that. …Except maybe Jared Leto. He looks crazy as shit.”

A brief smile crossed Kara’s lips at her friend’s antics before her words managed to sink in. A shiver went through the Kryptonian at the reminder of her earlier days. She hated the Kitchens and rightfully so. It was the stuff nightmares were made of. Katu was right of course, but still... She thought back to Alex standing on that roof; arrogant and self-assured, face the picture of righteous fury. And she thought about hurting her.

“Doesn’t matter now.” She said in lieu of dissecting her feelings. “They think she’s worth something, they want me to get close to her.” This new assignment didn’t make her feel any better, an assessment that was apparently not shared by Katu if her reaction was anything to go by.

“That blows! Well then… I guess you know what you have to do.”

Kara quirked an eyebrow, clearly saying that no, she did not know what to do.

“Ride that face. Ride that face all night long.” The hip rocking and lude gestures that Katu made after that almost made Kara wish she could hit her.

Well that or hug her. She could never decide with Katu.

//

“Hey Linda.” The blonde looked up as the Agent fell into step beside her. Alex had taken to arriving around the time Kara did, intent on making sure she was there before “The White Queen Landed”. The first time Kara had heard the reference she had thought Alex a bit racist, which made no sense since Alex herself appeared to be Caucasian. But then everyone had laughed and she had found herself doing a quick search of why. The humor was not lost on her, and she wished she could read The Chronicles of Narnia.

After Alex’s Harry Potter episode yesterday, Kara was inclined to believe the Agent was a bit of a book nerd.

“Hello.” Her hands moved up to her glasses, fidgeting with the frames and Alex quirked an eyebrow at her, mouth curling into a smirk. Feeling weirdly caught, Kara shoved her hands in her pockets and faced forwards, walking determinedly into the Catco building. “I heard you had an eventful night last night.”

Alex leaned passed her, pressing the call button for the elevator before Kara could and leaning casually against the wall.

“Yeah.” Was her short reply, surliness coating her features. A ding was heard as the elevator came and Alex gestured her in first, face still dark.

Right. So not a good conversation starter.

Keeping her hands in her pockets of her mint green jacket, she racked her brain for something humans might talk about. Unfortunately, they arrived at their floor before she could come up with anything.

“See you around Linda.” The agent sent a wave over her shoulder as she navigated the early morning workers in search of coffee.

A sigh left the Kryptonian as she made her way over to her desk. She was a highly trained asset of the United States military; surely small talk was something she could handle.

Right?

She rolled her shoulders as her computer booted up, seeing the search box appear as she opened her browser. Flexing her fingers, she entered her first search for the day.

How to make friends.

… Why would someone want to ‘alienate people’?  

//

Alex was bored. While on ‘Cat watch’ she wasn’t allowed to do any of her own research or investigating. Not if it meant taking her eyes off the CEO. As such she had to rely on her colleagues, and send any pertinent information along to them.

Unfortunately, no such information was forthcoming. Cat had breezed in an hour late, looking none the worse for wear. Her hair perfectly bouncy and full of shine, makeup meticulously applied, and outfit looking like she just stepped off a runway. Alex hated her on principle.

Her arrival also meant that Winn had to stop hiding on the IT floor and make his way back up to his desk. Salary workers didn’t get downtime. Alex was waiting for him with a pack of twizzlers and a grin when he walked off the elevator, his own personal storm cloud hovering over his face.

Winn’s clothing was rumpled and his face and eyes were red, mouth pulled into a thin line. Shit. Did something happen with his mom?

“You ok?” She asked, moving from his chair, and standing to greet him. “Did something happen?”

Winn scoffed and glared at her, before sitting in his chair and pointedly ignoring her existence.

Alex blinked.

“Ok,” her fingers itched and she pulled at them fruitlessly. “So, you’re mad at me. It’s not your birthday.” She mused, knowing for sure she hadn’t missed any important dates. Those at least she was good at.

“Fuck off Alex.”

Her eyebrows shot up to her forehead and she noticed the employees nearby pause in their work at Winn’s words.

“Dude, what the hell? What’d I do?”

The itching had spread to the back of her hands now and she idly wondered if maybe she was allergic to something. She wondered if there was any rubbing alcohol around.

Winn’s chair hit the wall behind him as he jumped to his feet.

“What’d you do? What’d you do?!?! Are you seriously asking me that right now?!” he asked, voice a whisper scream. Great, now Linda was looking.

“Yeah I am. And stop yelling, you’re making a scene. You’re my friend and I--”

“Friends?! Seriously Alex? Do you even know what that means?” the tech genius clenched both of his hands in his hair, face a nice lobster red at this point. “You left me for dead. I do IT, I sit behind a desk. I wasn’t trained like you. And you just left. You painted a damn target on my back and you left.”

His words were hissed at her, coming from between clenched teeth so she was sure that most of what he said was heard by only her ears, yet somehow, she felt heat rising to her face as embarrassment flooded her. Because he was right. She had been careless yesterday. There had still been hostiles in the area, Winn wasn’t trained. Hell, she didn’t even know if he had a gun! And she’d still sent him in after Cat. She’d left them both.

“I didn’t… I mean… Winn, I never meant--”

“No. That’s just it Alex. You never mean to do anything.” Winn shook his head, shoulders flopping helplessly. “But I’m done. I’m done defending you and making excuses. I’m just done. I am not a red shirt.” 

He stormed off after that, knocking his action figures on his desk. Apparently, his fear of Cat wouldn’t be competing with his dislike of Alex at the moment.

She pulled her hands apart, trying to force them to stop shaking   , and righted the figurines on his desk. Her hands shook even more when she reached the Superman figurine.

She left it where it was, head jammed under the keyboard.

Fuck Kal-El.

//

“Lisa!”

Cat’s voice pierced the morning workflow, and Kara hurriedly stood from her desk and made her way into the glass office.

“Yes Ms. Grant?”

“After last night’s debacle I have been fielding calls from Handler, Robins, Cooper, and of course that drama queen Oprah.” The CEO was busily moving around her office, a glass of what appeared to be wine, cradled in one hand and her phone in the other. “I need you to respond to all of them with a vague statement of my excellent health and spirits and decline any and all interviews until further notice. Also screen my calls, if it’s about the attack it’s on hold. I don’t want anyone scooping this story but me, and I can’t do that until I have found my angle.”

Kara’s hand moved speedily across the page, happy for her brain power as Ms. Grant continued to list off celebrity reporters that needed to be contacted.

“Yes Ms. Grant. I’ll take care of this right now.”

The blonde turned to leave, intent on carrying out her bosses wishes when she saw Cat lift the wine glass to her lips and take a long pull. Honing in her senses she also took notice of the elevated heart rate and increased levels of perspiration.

Cat was scared.

“Ms. Grant,” she started, turning back to the shorter woman. “Do you need anything else? I can see if Nikita has an opening this afternoon?”

The answering scoff told Kara that her efforts would be ignored, and she sighed internally. Humans were so dumb.

“Listen Luna, your concern is touching, if not misplaced. I do not need a spa treatment. I need Agent Scully and her merry band of super agents to get it together and figure out why my company is such an asset to these terrorists. Until I have that information I have no story, and if I have no story than this is all pointless. Do you understand?”

Kara nodded, because she did understand. She’d been searching for the reasons behind cruelty for years.

She’d almost reached the door when Cat’s voice called her back.

“And Luna? I’m issuing a curfew starting immediately. No one works after six pm. No one. With all this extra security we’re going to have to start cutting costs. I don’t want anyone staying past their time. I want the building cleared. That goes for you too. No more waiting for me to leave. If you’re that hard up, you can get a second job in the evenings. You’re out at six got it? Write the memo.”

“Yes Ms. Grant.”

When she was finally seated at her desk, Kara pulled up a blank document and typed out her boss’ memo. Her wording would have to be Cat appropriate. When the draft was done she sent it to Cat for approval. Along with a confirmed Saturday appointment for a full spa day; unlimited mimosas included.

Despite Cat’s new six pm rule, Kara found herself being dismissed a little after 6:10. Shouldering her bag she moved around her desk and out into the open floor. She happened to glance over at Winn’s desk and found the short man alternatively glaring at his computer screen and glaring at something off to her left. Mildly curious she turned to see the object of his anger and was met with Alex.

She hadn’t seen the Agent since that morning, but she’d known she was around. Alex may have been an acquired personality but she took her job seriously. Currently she was standing by Cat’s elevator, face alert and eyes continuously scanning the floor for any threats. She also kept staring at her watch. And scratching at her hands.

Frowning Kara weighed her options. She was supposed to get close to Alex, find out who she was as a person and how that could help Cadmus. She already knew from experience that Alex wasn’t exactly fond of her kind; that meta’s and aliens were way behind humans on Alex’s ‘list of worthy’.    That kind of mentality would help her fit right in at CADMUS.

But Kara very badly wanted that to be false. For some reason she very badly wanted Alex to see that CADMUS was not a place she wanted to be at. Wanted Lillian to make the Agent an offer and for Alex to say a firm no. Realistically she knew that probably wouldn’t happen, CADMUS had vast resources and as a scientist Alex would have access to anything she needed. Any experiment she wanted to perform would more than likely be granted. She need only ask. Lillian would be like her genie. Who would turn down an opportunity like that? It was Kara’s job to make sure she didn’t.

On the other hand, Katu’s advice came to her. This was her first long term assignment. After this there was a good chance she’d be back to Cleanup’s  . She should experience what she could, hold on to it while she had the chance. Besides she needed new material  .

Mind made up, Kara walked over to the agitated Agent, slowly putting a hand on her shoulder. Alex still startled and flinched away from the contact.

“Linda! Hi. Hey, how are you?”

“Hi Alex.” She moved fully around the agent, hand dropping to her bicep as she peered into her face. “I’m good thank you for asking… um I was just wondering if you had um… Well the thing is Ms. Grant has this new curfew and--”

Alex smiled, stopping the flow of words from becoming any more jumbled.

“Linda, you work in a very chatty office.” Alex’s hand moved to cover hers on her arm, giving a quick squeeze. “I heard about the curfew before you even wrote the memo. It’s a really good idea on Cat’s part, it will make her employees safer for sure. And since you count as one of her employees, I’m all for keeping them safe.” Alex offered her a crooked smile before continuing in a regretful tone. “But I can’t leave until I’m relieved and the second agent is currently unavailable, so for the foreseeable future I’m stuck with Umbridge.”

“I know that one!”

A blush flooded her face at her exclamation even though Alex’s raised eyebrow showed nothing but amusement. Geez, she had zero social skills. Non-existent.

“Um… Well, I just meant that I had maybe googled the main characters and plot of Harry Potter. I um didn’t want to offend you with my ignorance again.” She couldn’t stop the fidgeting that overtook her body at the awkwardness of the moment.

Luckily Alex didn’t seem to even notice, choosing instead to grab her shoulders and shake slightly.

“Don’t google anything else! It’s not real unless you read the books. I--”

“LISA!” Ms. Grant’s voice cut through their brief moment and Alex seamlessly moved away from her, allowing Kara’s hand to drop awkwardly between them. “I thought I told you to go home.”

Cat’s eyes were piercing, and Kara found herself fumbling for a response. She was an idiot. Socially inept. Kill her now.

“Her name is Linda, and she was on her way out.” Alex said, shooting a glare at Cat before giving Kara a small smile. “Goodnight Linda. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Kara tried to smile back, but she was sure it was more of a grimace and then quickly fled. It wasn’t until she got to the elevator that she allowed herself to breathe. She recited an old Kryptonian meditation prayer mentally, allowing her body to relax. She really needed to get a hold of herself.

“Dude. You have ZERO game.”

She was proud to say she did not jump.

She did squeal.

Winn smirked at her from his position in the corner of the elevator. Tablet in hand, the man had his messenger bag across his cardigan covered chest and was regarding her like his new pet project.

“You like Alex.”

“What?!” Why was her voice so squeaky? “No, I don’t- I just… I mean she’s nice but- I…”

Please let this day end.

Please.

“Dude, you literally did a google search for ‘how to make friends’. My gaydar is blaring right now.”

Her jaw dropped, and she felt heat rush to her cheeks. “No- I mean- I was just looking because, well see there’s maybe an article that I... But no, I don’t like Alex.”

There. Done. No more words.

Winn shrugged as the elevator arrived at the ground level. “Well it just seems like you do. Which is fine. Lesbianism is a thing. Super supportive of it by the way. And since you weren’t a douche when I asked you out, I’m just saying I’d be willing to help. But since you’re not interested…”    Another shrug marked his slow departure out of the elevator.

Kara sighed. She needed help. The last three conversations she’d had in the last twenty minutes alone had proven that. She rubbed at her temples. Could Kryptonians even get headaches?

“Winn… Wait.”

The smaller man sprinted back to her, shit eating grin on his face.

“I knew it!” He whisper yelled, grabbing her arm and pulling her towards the doors. “Ok, so first thing. We need to geek you up. You know nothing. It’s embarrassing for the world.”

Kara’s eyebrows shot up. The world? That was a bit excessive. Winn ignored her incredulous look and kept chattering on. She sighed. This was going to be harder than she thought.   

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Few things:  
> 1\. On tonight's Supergirl episode, Alex made a Grey's Anatomy reference and I died. Literal fandom heaven.  
> 2\. I forgot to mention that in the last chapter, I leaned on the movie A-Team for the Mahwag sequence. So cheers to them, thanks for the inspo.  
> 3\. We saw some insight into Kara here, that will be a regular thing from here on out. Currently I am trying very very hard to write only from the POV of two people in this story as a form of discipline. It's excruciating.  
> 4\. IDK if anyone watches Grey's over here but the mid season premiere had a trans person! I was so excited! I mean, when they first introduced the character I kinda guessed, but it was so much better that it was confirmed. Even if it was just a minor role. Plus the way they did it was pretty badass. So for full transperancy, I've been trying to work a lot of LGBTQ+ content into this story, with the main reason being the group is widely under represented in literature. At least from my standpoint. I'm also including more POC and emphasizing that for the same reasons. And as of right now, none of them are going to die. Not the black guy and not the lesbian. I've already gotten through about 10 chapters so far and I'm really happy with what I have, but if I DO offend anyone, take my sincere apology and let me know what ignorant comment I made. I'm going to try my damndest not to mess up any of the groups I'm representing here but I'm not infallible, so I ask for patience.
> 
> Thanks guys!
> 
> Song Title: Eminem ft. Ed Sheeran- River. I love Ed's part on this track. The whole thing was good, but I really enjoy listening to Ed Sheeran. ...just not songs like 'Shape of You'.
> 
> Also thank you for all the lovely comments. You guys really make my day with them.
> 
> If you have any other questions, you can find me on Tumblr (chroniclesofscout). Currently I'm only really reblogging funny stuff but I'll answer any questions, concerns or comments you guys might have, including about any media/movie/book references I make in this story.
> 
> Lastly, sorry to the Twilight fans... Loved some of the fanfics but the actual works sucked so bad. 
> 
> ~Chronicles.


	4. He’d Grown Up Just Like Me (My Boy Was Just Like Me)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex tries to understand humans; Kara tries to understand Alex.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. I really like the song Cat's in the Cradle.... 
> 
> 2\. That's it I didn't have anything else.
> 
> Cat's in the Cradle- Harry Chapin

** He’d Grown Up Just Like Me (My Boy Was Just Like Me) **

The end of the week couldn’t come fast enough for Kara. Ms. Grant had been on a warpath ever since the attack and the entire office was stressed out. Alex had seemed doubly untouchable, choosing to spend her time completely focused on her job rather than goofing around with Winn like she’d done before.

Of course, that could also be due to the not so little fight Kara had overheard between the two of them. Seeing the two of them at odds had made her uncomfortable and, if she were being honest, if Lillian hadn’t insisted she get closer to the DEO agent she would have avoided the both of them like the plague. She hated conflicts in general; putting herself in the middle of one had seemed counterproductive. Especially when she had to look at the fallout of the encounter in Alex every day.

It had been weird seeing her so stoic and unmovable. Kara had quickly decided that she didn’t like it, and had tried to be a bit nicer to the agent. It didn’t always work as, although Winn had shown her some things last week, it had hardly been enough for her to get through one conversation. He’d promised they’d work together again that weekend, Saturday. Today: Saturday.

She was both excited and scared at the new partnership. Actually, interacting with normal people still felt strange, and she constantly felt like an imposter. Which, technically, she was. Winn’s offer had been a chance for her to maybe also work on her ‘human’ skills as well. This assignment had already stretched out for much longer than had been anticipated. Every time she cornered the market on new ALFA members, the whole plot unraveled to reveal deeper and more malicious intentions.

If she was going to be here much longer, she should try to fit in better to her role. And learn how to have a real conversation with Alex that didn’t involve them interrogating each other. It wasn’t that the other woman had been rude to her, no quite the opposite. Alex had been nothing but kind, if slightly distant. It was Kara who kept running away.

So now here she was, standing in a Barnes and Noble with Winn as he led her down the Young Adult aisle. Her new friend was dressed in much the same fashion he preferred to wear to Catco; khaki pants and a blue plaid button up. He’d forgone the cardigan today, and had his sleeves rolled up to his elbows. Although he looked exactly the same to Kara, something about his wardrobe change had attracted the attention of quite a few women who kept peeking over as he passed. Not that Winn noticed. He was far too absorbed in telling her which books she would need to get through to win Alex’s affection.

She felt like such a fraud.

A huge rectangular object was shoved at her chest, and if she hadn’t been Kryptonian she was sure it would have hurt with how heavy it was. She looked down to see the complete Harry Potter book collection in her arms before another book set was placed on top of that one. Hurriedly, before he could try to cover her face in books, she shoved the sets into the courtesy bag that Barnes and Nobles had provided. The Harry Potter figure looking like he was aiming at the Olympian kid when they were both settled. Winn was perusing the aisle, probably making sure he wasn’t forgetting anything when her eyes caught sight of a title that had she’d heard thrown around the office a few times.

"What about this black one over here?" Her hand reached up, fingers closing around the spine of a book called "Twilight", before deftly being smacked away.

"No, you must never go there Simba. Never." Winn’s tone was deadly serious and although she now recognized when he and Alex made fictional references, they still flew way over her head. Who the heck was Simba anyway?

“Ok.” Was what she said, nodding along determinedly. Maybe Alex despised the series?

Winn smiled, grabbing her arm, and pulling her along to the adult sections.

“Sweet. Ok so those two sets should have you navigate Alex’s teen years. Full of angst and rock music, they were. Eventually she graduated to this series though. It’s her absolute favorite. She doesn’t talk about it as much since we’ve never met anyone else who’s read it, but this will get you huge conversation points.”

He stopped in front of another book collection titled ‘Codex Alera’. “This one’s pretty great. Alex got me into it. It basically tells the story of this young boy and his friends fighting against ignorance and bigotry, and essentially changing their world. It’s fantasy so there’s magic, swords and different creatures, huge bonus points.”

Kara nodded, fingering the spine of one of the books and pulling it out.

“You’re going to need to use your words eventually. You do know, that right?”

Her head snapped up, and heat flooded her cheeks when she met Winn’s amused face.

“Yes, I know. I’ll speak. I can talk I mean. Shoot.” What was wrong with her? She’d never experienced such failure in her life. _You’ve also never tried to make friends before._ She kindly told her inner voice to _be quiet_. It was so not the time for cold feet.

Winn ignored the scowl on her face, choosing instead to finish loading the rest of the books into her bags.

“You’re not one for cursing huh?” He asked, pulling her over to the graphic novels.

She sighed, one hand going up to push hair out of her face. She wasn’t used to having it this long. She wasn’t used to anything this assignment was requiring of her.

“No. My parents frowned upon vulgarity, their mindset kind of stuck.”

“Yeah, I was a foster kid so we started cursing pretty early.” His words sounded like a test and she frowned. Winslow Schott Jr. had been a foster kid for exactly one year before his mother had proven to the courts that she could care for him. His file had stated that he was well adjusted and showed no signs of any social or cognitive deformities. What was he trying to get at exactly?

“I was a foster child too. I lost my parents when I was young, and got placed in the system. No cursing though. The other children pretty much ignored me.”

Winn beamed at her taking her over to the checkout line. Whatever test he’d just administered, she’d obviously passed.

“Other kids suck. You don’t need them now, you’ve got Winslow Schott at your service my lady. And he’s going to help you get _your_ lady.” He snickered at his horrible joke and Kara watched on amused.

Because he was right; kids did suck. But the adults were so much worse.

“Why are you helping me?” She asked, trying to keep distance between herself and a woman who clearly had never heard of personal space before. “I mean you don’t even know me. And you also seem to be pretty pissed at Alex so it can’t be for her. I don’t get it.”

Winn frowned, the creases on his face making him look older as he regarded her with something like sympathy.

“Foster kids have to stick together right?” He shuffled his feet slightly, ducking his head and giving her a slight shoulder bump. “Besides, Alex may not be my favorite person right now, but that doesn’t mean I hate her or anything. She’s just… she’s… limited… I guess. She tries really hard, she just doesn’t always get it right.” He shrugged helplessly, moving forward with the line and keeping his eyes face forward. “She doesn’t do it to be malicious, she’s just…”

“Limited.” Kara supplied when it seemed he was still at a loss for words.

“Yeah…” He crossed his arms, uncrossed them and fidgeted with his pockets. “I don’t want you to think she’s a shitty person—she’s not! Not by a long shot! She’s an asshole for sure, but she’s also the most loyal person I know. She’s crazy smart; super funny; judgmental as all hell.” He chuckled, glancing at her from the corner of his eyes. “She’s got her quirks, but she’s worth it. You just can’t let her walk all over you. She’s like a kid; she needs boundaries.”

Kara nodded in thought, going over everything he had said. “So, you’re what… teaching her a lesson?”

Winn snorted, shaking his head as they moved up in line and walked up to the cashier.

“Not at all.” He said, helping her put her items on the counter and offering the woman at the register a charming smile. Kara’s own smile felt awkward and she hoped she wasn’t scaring the woman. “I just need to know that she doesn’t think of me as expendable. I need her to show me that she doesn’t think of me that way. A half-assed apology isn’t going to cut it this time.” He paused, waiting for her to finish paying before taking the bags in his own hands and walking out the store. “I shouldn’t be dumping this all on you. Alex is pretty good with newbies. And I’m pretty sure she’s interested; you’re different from anyone we’ve ever met. You’re like… nice.” He concluded as if that explained everything.

“Am I not supposed to be?” She squinted at the harsh sunlight that hit them when they stepped out onto the street and tugged her jacket tighter around her. Not from the cold—Kara didn’t really get cold—but from habit. CADMUS had drilled such nervous gestures into her very being in preparation for this assignment. They were almost second nature now.

Winn laughed, and turned a corner, narrowly avoiding plowing into someone on the other side. “C’mon Linda Taylor, we just have to make a few more stops. You said you have a PC at home, right? Do you know your specs? Generally Mass Effect doesn’t require an insane amount of power, but Star Wars will glitch on you after a while on a subpar system.”

Kara listed off the specifications of her computer, Winn’s eyes looking like they were almost physically turning into hearts as she spoke. Internally she preened, if Winn was impressed with the human technology, she could only imagine what he would have done with Kryptonian computers.

This might not be so hard after all.

//

“Are you just here to annoy the shit out of me or what Danvers?”

Maggie’s voice, unlike her words, showed no annoyance. The detective sat at her desk, hunched over paperwork, and had been doing a thoroughly good job of ignoring Alex was even there. That was until Alex had picked up her rubber band ball and started lobbing it against the wall. At that point Maggie had pushed her long brunette hair behind her ears and shook her head with an affectionate smile, well used to Alex’s antics. As a detective she’d had to take more than a few psych courses in college, a fact she never let Alex forget. Her conclusion was that Alex had the emotional maturity of a 14-year-old due to her ginormous brain.

Alex’s argument, that she had been near ready to go to college at 14 had only ever served to make Maggie laugh. The woman was super disrespectful in Alex’s opinion.

“Shut it Sawyer.” A pause. “It’s just that… Winn’s being super unreasonable.”

Maggie sighed, pushing herself away from her desk to give Alex her full attention.

“Is he really?” She asked, eyebrow raised in question.

A frown pulled at Alex’s features as she rolled the rubber band ball in her hands. “No. He isn’t.” A few quick dribbles on Maggie’s desk. “It’s um… It’s making me want to have a drink.”

Now both of Maggie’s eyebrows shot up, arms crossing against her chest as she leaned further back in her chair.

“I wasn’t aware you were pacing yourself these days Danvers.”

“I wasn’t.” Alex said. She tugged on her bottom lip in agitation. She hadn’t meant to reveal that. Not yet anyway, not until it actually mattered. “But Hank was right, it was becoming a problem. I should have stopped a while ago. I’m only two weeks in… I um… I’m thinking of just going cold turkey this time.”

“Aww look at you Danvers. Puttin on your Big Girl pants. I’m so proud.” Maggie’s voice was filled with warmth and affection, and Alex’s cheeks flooded at the praise. “Kate’s finally decided on a date by the way. Maybe this means you’ll actually look like a nice gentlewoman for the wedding.”

Alex scowled, even though internally she was grateful for the distraction.

“I always look amazing you jackass. You steal my jackets all the time.”

Maggie rolled her eyes, pulling herself back over to her desk. “That’s because they look way better on me.” She said, focusing back on her work.

A short lull.

“Do you ever wonder--”

“Nope.”

“—what you’d be doing if you weren’t doing what you were doing?”

Maggie’s head thumped onto her desk and a high-pitched whine emerged from her throat.

“No. No I don’t. I like my life. I love my job; I love my fiancée; I love my friends. It’s all awesome. Wouldn’t change a thing. Now please, let me get back to work, you know that thing that you should be doing right now?”

Alex let out a soft noise of disbelief, but chose not to comment, allowing Maggie to get some more work in. They sat like that for another 10 minutes before Alex started playing catch with the wall again.

Maggie ignored her.

Another ten minutes went by and Alex had worked a nice floor bounce into her routine.

“Seriously Danvers? Some of use actually need to work.”

“Well what are you working on?” Alex asked without pausing her new game.

“As I told you when you came in, there’s been some murders happening in National City that have no real connection. I’m trying to see if there is one. You’re trying to see how quickly I can murder _you_.”

Alex laughed. “You can’t murder me. Too slow. Your case is boring. Tell me how to fix Winn.”

“My case is not boring, it’s important.” Maggie’s voice remained patient even if her pen pressed down a little too hard on her notepad. “And Winn doesn’t need fixing. You do.”

The ball thumped hard against the wall as Alex caught it and held it firmly in her hand.

“You think so? But… I really like me.”

Maggie stood, walking over to her dry erase board and transferring some of her notes next to a clipping of a house.

“It’s great that you enjoy your own company Danvers, but that’s not going to get you far. All that self-love bullshit is great and all, but if no one else can stand you you’re not going to get far.”

Alex pulled her bottom lip between her teeth as she contemplated Maggie’s words. She knew she might not be the best person to ever live but she wasn’t a complete monster, was she?

“You like me.” Her response was quiet, and she almost wished she could take the words back. They made her sound way too vulnerable for her liking.

“I _love_ you, you daft idiot.” The words were said on a chuckle, and Maggie flashed her a quick dimpled grin over her shoulder before resuming her whiteboard notes. “But just because I love you doesn’t mean that you don’t have some things you need to work on. Everyone has things. I have major commitment issues, and I’m scared as shit to be marrying the woman of my dreams. I’m working on it. You are saddled with guilt over your Dad and what happened to Kara. You’re pissed as fuck that you ‘failed’, not once but twice… in less than a year mind. You’re pissed at your mom. And you _are not_ working on it.” The marker squeaked as Maggie wrote out another name, Alex’s heart thundering in her chest as she white knuckled her rubber band ball. “You refuse to let anyone get too close to you, not because they’ll hurt you, but because even though you say you like yourself, you’re terrified that no one else will. That if people see the real you, they’ll turn around and walk away, and you’ll lose them. Just like you lost everyone else. So, you keep everyone at arm’s length, you get drunk so they’ll think you’re entertaining; tell stupid stories. Superficial stuff. Nothing too deep. And then you just try to balance it out. And when someone wants more, tries to get to know more about you, you bolt. Say they’re too clingy, or that they’re too weird; too possessive. _They’re_ always the problem. Never you. You’re not dealing, you’re surviving. You have to crawl out of that hole eventually Alex.”

Alex had frozen at the mention of Kara’s name. Maggie was one of the few people who even knew that Kara had existed. And she’d just said her damn name. Had just stripped down every wall Alex had ever erected, as if they’d been nothing but tissue paper.

“You should actually try showing Winn you’re sorry. Instead of just saying it, show him you’re willing to change. That you won’t leave him stranded again.”

Alex swallowed past the lump in her throat, slowly placing the rubber band ball back in its holder on Maggie’s desk.

“They’re being picked off by Thermigarians.”

The squeak of the dry erase marker paused as Maggie turned to her with a puzzled expression on her face. “Sorry?”

“You’re victims? They all died at a time of day where the moon was first visible. They’re all lying face up, eyes open. The murderer wants them to give their last blessings to the deity Nokor.”

Maggie’s mouth dropped into an ‘o’, and she switched her gaze from Alex to her list of victims on the board, back to Alex. “How did you…”

Alex stood, wiping her hands on her thighs as she gave a shaky smile. “If you sweep your evidence again you should find high concentrations of sodium chloride. Your team probably had an excuse for its presence since it’s just regular salt, but the levels should be significant enough for you to take a second look. Thermigarians love the stuff.” Maggie continued looking at her dumbfounded. Alex didn’t know why, fresh eyes and all that. Her chest hurt. Moving quickly, she made her way to the door. “I uh, I have to get going. Thanks for the talk.”

She was gone before Maggie could ask any more questions.

//

Going home to an empty house was nothing new to Alex. She’d gotten pretty used to it after her father had died and her mother had checked out. Eliza was doing much better now, but in those first few years she might as well have been a ghost. She hadn’t even noticed when Alex started drinking, or stealing her anti-depressants. She’d basically just floated through life.

Alex hadn’t wanted to follow in her footsteps. Had promised herself that she would be there for the people she cared about, no matter what.

And she had failed in that oath over and over again.

Flicking on her lights, she scratched at the backs of her hands as she made her way to her kitchen. She knew exactly where she had hidden the bottle of bourbon, and pulled the cabinet open to reach for it. The ‘Old Rip Van Winkle’ bottle she pulled out stared back at her mockingly. She’d made a lot of promises in her life and she seemed doomed to break every one of them.

What was one more?

“What’s that? It smells!”

The bottle was in her hand and ready to launch as she turned around to meet… nothing…

“Whoa! You are _fast_! Faster than mom anyway! Dad says that humans aren’t as fast as we are but you’re _way_ faster than most humans.”

Alex’s eyes went up to her ceiling, the origin of the voice, and had to fight hard not to then roll them. Jonathan Kent sat cross legged, upside down, making animated hand gestures, face alight with excitement as he regaled her with his plans to make her a superhero.

He’d been trying to do so since he turned 4.

“Your parents are going to kill you.” Is what she said instead, uncorking the bottle in her hand and dumping it down the sink. “Please tell me you at least left them a note. And come down, you’re going to make me get a crick in my neck.”

Jon smiled unabashedly and flipped down from his inverted position, landing deftly on his feet. His nose promptly scrunching up as he smelled the alcohol and Alex turned on the faucet to dilute the smell.

“Gross. What was that stuff?”

“Poison. Did you tell your parents you were coming here?”

The nine-year-old followed her out of the kitchen to the living room, flopping down on her couch as she pulled some take out menus from under her coffee table.

“No. I ran away.” He said as if this was obvious and poo on her for not realizing. “They never let me come here anyway. They say you’re ‘troubled’. I don’t even know what that means.”

Alex smiled as she thumbed in the Pizza place’s number.

“It means that they think I’m going to corrupt you to the dark side and turn you into a Sith lord.”

Jon’s eyes went big and Alex stifled her laughter as the restaurant picked up her call. She placed their order and sank into the couch next to her charge.

“What’s going on Jon? Why are you here?” Phone still in hand, she quickly thumbed in a text to Lois to let her know where her son was. Right or wrong, Jon’s parents adored him and were probably out of their minds with worry.

“I missed you. You didn’t come to my game.” The pout of one Jonathan Kent was _real_. He was the spitting image of Clark, with a head full of dark hair and ethereal blue eyes. Dressed in an orange hoodie and blue jeans, he looked like your average kid.

And Alex loved him dearly.

Alex shoved her shaking hands into the pockets of her hoodie, toeing off her shoes as she shoulder checked the kid next to her.

“Dude, you live in a whole other state. That’s a plane ride. I’m not hopping on a plane to see your pre-season. I told you I’d come out for the playoffs, and, once you trounce those losers, I’ll be there for the ‘ships. You can’t keep running off like this without letting someone know.” She said, flicking on the tv, and easing further into the couch; socked feet coming to rest on the table in front of her. “Your parent’s love you, they deserve a modicum of respect for that.”

“What’s ‘modicum’?” Jon asked, brows scrunching adorably as he pressed closer into Alex’s side.

“It’s a small quantity of something. Synonyms include: little, bit, and measure. Use it in a sentence.” She looked at him with a raised eyebrow, moving her arm so that he could shove his head under it and against her chest.

“My dad does not have a _modicum_ of respect for you.” Jon stated cheekily and Alex laughed full belly.

“Yeah. That’s pretty good. Did you bring your homework?”

The child nodded, wriggling out from under her to retrieve his school supplies. He spread them out on her coffee table as he caught her up on his classes and teachers. Being half Kryptonian, his family had expected him to be a mini genius, but he was just Jon. And the disappointment sometimes bled through in the lectures he received about his grades.

Alex had been there before, trying to live up to extranormal expectations. She’d failed spectacularly. Jon didn’t deserve to go through what she had. She didn’t want that for him.

They were halfway through learning about multiplying fractions when the pizza came. Jon’s face lit up and he immediately set about setting up their “super awesome study bonanza”. The kid really needed to get away from Clark, his vocabulary was severely lacking. She used the time he was distracted to continue texting Lois. The woman had not been worried at all about Jon’s ‘disappearance’ because he was supposed to have been with his father. Clark Kent. AKA Superman. Who instead of watching his son, was currently cleaning up a massive interstate pile up on 67. Talk about fuck up.

“Alex! Are you listening to me?” Jon shoved a slice of pizza in her face which she barely managed to grab as he sat next to her on the floor in front of their makeshift study bench.

“Of course, Thumper, you were telling me all about how much Misha Bolen loves pizza and you love Misha Bolen.” Alex teased, satisfied when Jon’s cheeks flamed red and he started sputtering excuses. “I need to meet this girl for myself. Make sure that she’s deserving of my best friend.”

Jon’s sputtering stopped, the boy going weirdly quiet as he took in her words. Alex glanced over at him, taking a bite of her pizza as she waited for him to process. Jon was like Clark in that way, sometimes he just needed a minute to think.

“You really think I’m your best friend?” He finally asked, pizza momentarily forgotten. Alex nodded, again allowing him a moment. “Then why won’t you come see me?”

She hated that. Hated how his voice got so small.

“Hey, I need you to listen to me ok? You know how me and your dad don’t see eye to eye? That’s got nothing to do with you. Clark sucks, but _you,_ you are the only good thing he ever did with his life. You’re the one good thing I’ve got in _my_ life. And I’m sorry I’m not around more, I’ll talk to your mom ok? We’ll work something out so we can see each other more often. But not right now. Right now, I’m working a pretty dangerous case and I don’t want anyone trying to hurt you to get to me. Then I’d go to jail for life with what I would probably wind up doing to them.” She pulled him closer so they were eye to eye, fingers clenching in the fabric on his shoulder. “No matter what happens, or what anyone says. _You_ are my _favorite_ person in the whole _world_. Ok?”

Jon smiled tremulously, eyes suspiciously wet. “Ok.”

Alex pressed a small kiss to his forehead, before withdrawing. “Good, now let’s start on history. Let’s see what lies are in print these days.”

So, involved were they in their studies, that neither noticed the arrival of Kal-El until he was already pulling open the balcony door. Alex had her gun in her hand and Jon behind her in an instant, barely relaxing even when she realized who it was.

“Dad!” The happy shout was completely expected from the child, even though Kal-El had ditched him. Again. The small boy ducked around Alex and ran over to his father, causing Alex to grudgingly stash her weapon and cross her arms over her chest.

“Hi Jon!” The man of steel swept his son up into his arms and hugged him tight, obvious relief in his stance. “I’m so sorry for running out bud, I had that pile up but that’s no excuse for running off. Family meeting when we get home. Grab your stuff, I need to talk to Alex for a second.”

Jon rolled his eyes at the silent standoff happening between the adults but complied with his father’s wishes. Alex sighed, following Kal out onto the balcony.

“Thank you for watching--”

Kal’s words were cut off when Alex’s fist slammed into his face, rocking his core, and forcing him back a step.

His astonished eyes met hers as she shook out her fingers, emerald green brass knuckles adorning her right hand.

“If you _ever_ abandon him again--”

“You have _kryptonite_ next to my _son--”_

“I will _murder_ you--”

“Are you out of your _damn mind--_ ”

“What _the hell_ is wrong with you--”

“he’s a _child_ Alex--”

“A child who you just left in the dust! Again! I thought you’d have learned your lesson the first time!”

Kal-El’s face twisted into an ugly scowl, shoulders bracing so that he was towering over her in a clear intimidation tactic.

“You mean like you did? You think I didn’t smell the alcohol? That I wouldn’t see you shaking? You need help Alex, seriously. And until you get it, stay the hell away from _my_ son.”

The words were like sledgehammers against her chest, forcing her back a step when even his bulk hadn’t been able to. Jon’s hurt gasp made her eyes burn and cheeks flame. She shoved her hands into her pockets again, trying to force them to stop shaking. Kal-El looked at her with an indiscernible expression before turning to his son.

“Let’s go Jon.” He said, turning away from her, and moving towards the ledge, but his son instead went over to Alex, wrapping his arms tight around her midsection.

“Best friends, right?”

Alex ducked her head, resting her cheek on Jon’s head even if she didn’t remove her hands from her pockets.

“Always kid. Rebel Alliance for life.”

Jon pulled away and sent her a beaming smile before moving towards his father. He waved shyly at her when Kal picked him up, and Alex stayed on the balcony staring after him, long after he had disappeared from view.

//

Vasquez was the first to notice her as she came onto the main platform at the DEO HQ. The small brunette’s head popped up over the main console and she smiled heartwarmingly at Alex as she came up the stairs.

“Late night Danvers.”

Alex shrugged, “couldn’t sleep. Too much on my mind. I wanted to go over the case files for Cat Grant.”

Vasquez’s eyes searched hers for a second and Alex knew she was taking in the shallow pallor and shaky countenance; taking in Alex’s less than optimal state. Finally, her handler nodded, standing from her chair, and leading her into one of the offices on the perimeter of the room. Vasquez pulled a tablet from a dock in the wall and allowed her fingers to fly over the surface.

“Here you go. This is everything we have.”

Multiple dead bodies popped up on the monitors in the room. Scanned copies of letters, and newspaper clippings. Alex’s eyes were directed to the Persons of Interest, and she scanned the accounts listed for any details she had missed.

Maggie had said earlier that she had had some unsolved murders happening in National City. From the very brief scan that Alex had done of the files on the detective’s desk, she had seen that the murders had had very little in common.

Vasquez placed a stress ball in front of her on the desk and with a quick shoulder squeeze walked out of the room.

Alex tended to work better alone.

The Agent picked up the ball, rolling it between her palms, as she reclined in one of the rolling chairs. Her eyes went back to the victims on the opposite monitor.

Dawn Schaeffer: worked at the local tech store; clean record, no priors, not even a speeding ticket. Killed by blunt force trauma to the head and neck.

Natalia Hernandez: Head of HR at C and G, a leading biotechnology company who specialized in robotic prosthetics. GSW to the upper right quadrant. Died in the OR.

Joseph Nicarago: Worked at Ace’s Specialty Car Mods; Prior arrests for drug possession and statutory rape of a minor. Killed by bloodletting. The kid had been tortured.

There were about 20 other cases of interest that the DEO had picked up but these were a few that Alex had seen on Maggie’s desk. There was a connection.

All of these victims had had a residue next to them, clearly seen in the pictures. Due to the violent nature of the murders it was an easy thing to miss, especially considering that these stains were caused by sodium chloride. Alex had surfed enough in her youth to recognize those; and she had worked at the DEO long enough to narrow down the list of suspects. Thermigarians were essentially made of salt water, in the same way that humans were made of water. Their saliva held a high enough concentration of the chemical that they generally left behind residue when the aliens showed emotions, such as agitation. The reason behind it though was still unclear.

Thermigarians were a working class of aliens, the males submitting to the will of their queens. More often than not they colonized and created farms and rural like homesteads.

Killing wasn’t exactly in their nature.

The ball felt soft in her hands and she squeezed absentmindedly, feeling the plastic material move between her fingers.

Something wasn’t adding up.

The cases she had seen on Maggie’s desk had almost certainly been committed by a Thermigarian.

Some of the cases she had in front of her were committed by Thermigarians.

Others she had attributed to the Cirzish.

Still others to the Mahwags.

Multiple killers, multiple cases.

None of the victims had seemingly anything in common.

Different murders, different scenes, different occupations, different races, different genders, different professions.

She’d checked for sexuality, gender identity, religion.

Nothing.

Which led to who they knew and what they knew.

And if the killers were all different species…

“Computer, pull up every major murder by alien in the last year.” She said, making her timeline broad on purpose. She needed more angles.

The monitors in the room suddenly became overloaded with case files, mug shots, and articles.

Records found: 172.

Oh boy.

This was going to take a while.

//

Monday morning found Alex grumpy and sleep deprived.

It had not been a very good weekend.

Her resting bitch face was on full force as she stumbled into Catco barely functioning. A hand touching her shoulder had her internally cringing at the idiot who was stupid enough to interrupt her pity party.

She was all set with a scathing remark until she turned and saw Linda standing in front of her; all shy smiles and rose cardigans. The woman’s hair was done up in an intricate knot at the back of her head and it exposed her neck to a decidedly exhausted Alex, who started to think things. Bad things.

A coffee cup being held in front of her nose pulled her out of her naughty fantasies and back to Linda’s shy smile.

“I um, I noticed you usually go to the employee lounge for coffee, but well Ms. Grant hates the stuff. She says instant coffee is for unsophisticated people, and you are not. Unsophisticated I mean.” Alex smiled, reaching out to take the cup in her own hand, while continuing to listen to the ramble in front of her. “You are very sophisticated. So, I thought that maybe you would like real coffee. Or I mean, _realer_ coffee. From Noonan’s. Black, like you like. Not that I’m stalking your coffee preferences, just that I never see you put cream or sugar in. Which sounds like stalking but it’s not. I’m not weird. Nope. I am just a really good observer. Who observed that you might need coffee. Today. For you. Um so yeah, there you go.”

Linda’s cheeks were bright red, and if Alex had been more coherent she would have been able to do a better job at calming the blonde down.

As it was she was still in her barely functioning mode and could only compute that she had wanted coffee. Someone had given her coffee. That someone deserved a reward.

Inhaling the caffeine from the lid brought a happy smile to her lips, and a confused one to Linda’s.

Reaching out her right hand, she squeezed Linda’s bicep making eye contact and trying to convey the magnitude of her thanks. That done, she sighed as she brought the cup up to her lips and took her first pull from the nectar of the gods, not minding at all the slight scalding her tongue had just received. And not noticing that she had left Linda staring after her in complete befuddlement.

It wasn’t until it was nearly three in the afternoon that she realized that she might have offended Cat Grant’s assistant. And even then, only because Winn was kind enough to poke his head out of his ball of anger to talk to her.

Or corner her more like.

“Linda likes you.” Were the first words out of his mouth. She’d gone to use the bathroom, making sure the agent on the roof of the opposite building had eyes on Cat before proceeding to use the facilities. Winn had been waiting right outside the door.

“I’m sorry?” She asked, blinking in confusion, and wiping barely dried hands on her trousers.

“Linda? You know the woman you were a complete douche to this morning? The one who went out of her way to get you coffee? Without so much as a thank you from you? That Linda?”

Alex felt her cheeks flame. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean--”

“Save it. I’ve heard it before. How about you try fixing it this time?” Winn’s voice was scathing and he kept flexing his fingers at his side. “Cause that girl? I don’t know how a girl like that even exists, and here she is with her sights set on _you._ So how about trying to be nice for once?”

And just like that he was gone, spinning on his heel, and making his way back towards his desk. Alex stood frozen and unsure.

Linda liked her?

She puzzled over this information and her options for the rest of the day, which helped keep her mind off of the absolute boredom that was watching Cat Grant.

Linda liked her.

She was still wondering what to do with that information (no way she could reciprocate, she’d promised Hank. She was going to keep her word this time), when she spotted Linda leaving Cat’s office at the end of the day. The girl looked slightly frazzled, and was hurriedly tapping away at her tablet.

Linda liked her.

Alex glanced over at Winn’s desk and saw the undercover agent make shooing motions with his hands. She gave a cautious smile, flashing him a thumbs up before they both seemed to realize what they were doing.

Winn was fraternizing with his enemy.

Alex was acting like a total noob.

It took everything out of her not to face palm, but when she had regained her cool, she shook out her shoulders and made her way over to Linda’s desk. It was the end of the work day, maybe they could at least grab some food. Get to know each other. They could just be friends. Alex could handle friends.

Linda’s head shot up at her approach and for a second, she looked like a deer caught in the headlights before she glanced at a spot over Alex’s shoulder (Winn obviously) and seemed to find her center. She still pushed up her glasses though which made Alex smile.

The woman worked 10-hour days, and yet the only time Alex noticed her playing with the adorable frames was when she was near. She made her nervous.

“Hi Linda.” She said smiling, trying to steady her voice and hands. “I was hoping to catch you before you left. This morning I wasn’t really awake so I wanted to use my words this time. Thank you. Seriously. I don’t know if I’d have been half as pleasant as I was without that drink.”

Linda eyed her for a second, eyes searching before she hesitantly offered a smile, arms easing their grip on the tablet she had clutched to her chest.

“It was no problem,” she murmured shyly. “There was um, a quote on the side. That I wrote.” She glanced up at her from over her frames, cheeks flooded with heat.

Alex’s eyebrows rose and she cursed her sleep deprivation for having thrown out the cup without looking it over. “Well now I feel even worse. What’d it say?”

Linda exhaled sharply and raised her squinted eyes to the ceiling, her right hand moving up to rub at her eyebrow. “Uh. Well. ‘I’m not worried Harry, I’m with you.’ It’s uh, Dumble--”

“—dore!” Alex finished excitedly. “You read Harry Potter? In a week?”

Linda smiled at her, hands fidgeting in front of her again as she nodded. “Yeah. It was a pretty easy read. Really good books too. And I had free time… It’s because you were worried before… about us employees. The quote I mean.”

Alex smiled, “Yeah, that was a good reference. Not sure I deserve that level of confidence though.”

“You do.” There was no doubt in Linda’s tone and she rubbed at her left forearm before visibly steeling herself. “I believe I was also promised a “Moviecation” which is an education in movies I think. Except I appear to have lost my teacher’s intertest.”

The bark of laughter that escaped Alex was completely unexpected and Linda offered her a pleased smile in return.

“No. My interest is definitely not lost.” She looked at the clock over Linda’s shoulder. Quitting time. “What are you doing right now? We could go back to my place? I’ve got takeout menus for days and a fully loaded DVD collection.”

“Yes. Yeah, I mean, I’m not doing anything. I would really like to um hang out.”

This smiling thing was getting to be a normality where Linda was concerned. Alex felt slightly off kilter, but still held out her arm and bowed toward the elevator.

“Then after you milady. We’ll start with the basics. You ever see ‘ _The Labyrinth_ ’?”

//

Alex likes her apartment.

It was one of the first things that she had bought herself once she’d started working at the DEO. The first thing being her beloved Kawasaki Ninja H2 Carbon. Her mother had not been pleased.

She also wasn’t too thrilled with Alex’s living arrangements.

“ _This is not an apartment Alexandra, it’s a bachelor’s pad.”_

It so wasn’t, Alex thought to herself as she unlocked her door and allowed Linda entry, she didn’t have much in the way of personal effects, but she had bought things for her space. The layout of the area was open, with virtually no walls or doors aside from the borders. It was an alcove studio, so her bedroom was tucked away in the L shaped corner to her left; her long-coveted California King bed freshly made and just waiting for her. To the right was the kitchen with her bar/kitchen area, and directly in front of them was the living area.

This might be the only area where her mother was right, having Winn as a friend/ pseudo little brother probably wasn’t helping. Her living room was equipped with a 60” flat screen 4k television that she had mounted on the wall; under which sat her Xbox One, and Nintendo 64 (her mom had tried to throw it out, she’d needed to rescue it!)

Linda’s brows rose in appreciation for her setup, and probably also the massive amounts of DVD/Blu-ray cases that were shelved on her walls.

She felt heat flood her cheeks, as Linda turned in a slow circle, and she shoved her hands in her back pockets, rocking back on her heels in the process.

Linda’s eyes pulled away from her cabinets, a strange giddiness overcoming her expression after looking in the kitchen, and finally focused on Alex.

“Everything up to your standards?” The brunette sassed, walking towards her fridge to pull out some drinks.

The soft chuckle behind her calmed her nerves enough that she bypassed her bottle of Guinness and reached instead for her IZZE drinks.

“Yes Alex. You have a lovely home.” The blonde had taken to leaning slightly on Alex’s island bar and nodded her head towards the pink bottle in Alex’s hand when given the choice between grapefruit or pomegranate.

“Do you mind if I record you saying that? My mom would have a field day.” Alex nodded her head towards the living room before heading over to her coffee table where the menus were stashed.

“Not at all.” Linda replied, standing awkwardly by the couch. Alex took a step toward her, placing her hand on her shoulder and shoving her unceremoniously onto the couch. Linda somehow still made it look graceful.

With a roll of her eyes Alex handed over the restaurant menus. “Why don’t you take a look and choose the food since I chose the movie? I’m gonna go clean up really quick, I hate staying in my work clothes.”

Linda accepted the menus with a bewildered look, thumbing through them slowly. Alex left her to her own devices, sighing as she stepped into her walk-in closet and pulled out a pair of sweats and a t-shirt. Clothes in hand she then walked directly into her adjoining bathroom, quickly using the facilities and changing her clothes. Feeling more human she walked out into her living room to see Linda slowly having a meltdown.

The blonde was kneeling in front of her coffee table, menus spread in front of her, and she’d skipped right passed glasses fidgeting to thumb biting. When she heard Alex come out, she looked up panicked.

“Please don’t be mad. I’ve just never had any of these food options, and there are so many choices that I can’t choose. I thought about choosing based on caloric value but none of these options seems to be any better than the other in that category, nor in terms of nutrition. I guess the Chinese restaurant has more vegetable options, but when I looked up some of the recipes it appears that they are just drowned in sodium rich sauces! And I know you wanted me to choose but I can’t and--”

“Whoa!” Alex raised her hands palms up, moving swiftly towards the anxiety ridden woman so that she too was kneeling next to the coffee table. “Whoa Linda. Let’s just take a breath.” She nodded soothingly when her directions were followed, although Linda still looked 5 seconds away from bolting. “Ok. That’s good. Now, what do you mean you’ve never had any of this before? You’ve never had takeout?”

Alex’s right hand dropped to Linda’s back, rubbing in soothing circles while trying to calm the blonde down. It took a second for her to realize what she was doing, but when she did she found she didn’t really mind the action.

When Linda shook her head no, Alex frowned and turned to stare at the assortment of menus in front of them.

“I’m sorry. I’m ruining this. I can go. I should just--”

“Nuh uh! No way.” Alex fisted her hand in the blonde’s dress shirt when she tried to rise, tugging her back down. “One: you have not seen the Labyrinth and I could die at any moment. This is my last dying wish Linda. You can’t turn that down. And two: you’ve never had takeout! That’s huge. I get to take your takeout cherry!” Linda did nothing but blink at her in confusion; it did nothing to dim Alex’s excited grin. “It’s an easy solution Linda, we’ll just order something from each culture!”

//

The rain came down in a steady downpour upon the lone figure perched on the window ledge of a 40th floor apartment. The water trekked over pale skin, creating rivers where flesh met the fabric of clothes.

As a Kryptonian, Kara didn’t even notice the cold. She couldn’t feel it, her current climate having no real impact on her inner thermostat. Instead, she was able to focus on the window of the building across from her.

It was bedtime, they were winding down for the night.

Idly she pulled on the sleeves of her uniform, the fingers of her right-hand stroking over the smooth vibranium of her left. She’d have to check on her arm mold when she returned to her base; there was nothing wrong with it per se (although it had still smelt of the Indian food Alex had ordered), but Winn insisted on touching her, and it had made her cautious. Apparently, humans showed affection through arm pats, hugs and shoving. Who knew?

She couldn’t afford mistakes, especially around someone of his caliber.

Soft voices from the building pulled her out of her thoughts and she stood from her crouched position. When only one heartbeat was left in the room she was focused on, she pulled at her cowl and flew over to the room’s window, pressing her fingers against the glass.

The curtains were pulled back immediately and a small girl was revealed to her. Warmth spread through her chest when the child beamed at her, and she answered the smile with one of her own.

Quickly she pressed a finger to her lips in the universal sign for quiet and waited for the girl’s excited nod.

That’s when she began her play. Alex and her had enjoyed the film _The Labyrinth_ , and, while Kara could not bring that movie to this sweet girl, she could reenact all that she remembered from it. Having superspeed was useful on occasion.

Soft quick breaths from the child denoted laughter.

Pinched, excited smiles denoted squeals.

Kara worked her way steadily through the main points of the plot, using her powers where imagination may have been lacking and holding up pre-made cue cards for parts that required explanation. Sara’s adventures with Hoggle and Toby to battle the Goblin King were a great source of material, and she hoped one day the girl would be able to see it for herself. Kara had been trained through videos but had never been privy to such amazing feats of fiction. Human’s had such oddities to entertain themselves. The film was not educational at all, but Alex had said there was a firm lesson to be gleaned from it. She’d asked Kara to let her know when she’d discovered it.

The Goblin King asked Sara for her obedience but Sara prevailed in her battle. Kara’s hand was stretched out as she reenacted Jareth falling away into nothing, when fingers curled over the curtains edges. She was gone in a flash, the image of the child’s face etched in her mind.

She loved that face more than _anything_.

Close cropped blonde hair; an oval face fit with thrilled blue eyes, and her smile… her child’s smile was just as beautiful as she’d remembered.

Squeezing her eyes shut she allowed her tears to mix in with the rain and prayed to Rao; Rao her dead God; Rao who’d turned his back on her; Rao who had never answered her before; Rao who was all she had left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Linda. In case your still questioning it, she'd got little to no memory of her life pre-cadmus. We'll explore why as we go on BUT that means she doesn't remember any of the food that was introduced to her at the Danvers'. Which means she doesn't remember how much she loved Pizza that first night there. It's kind of poetic that Alex is going to be the one to teach it to her all over again.
> 
> And Kal-El isn't evil. We have to remember we're seeing things from only Kara and Alex's POV, so however they feel towards a character, we're supposed to feel. Clark's trying really hard, he's just not succeeding. Alex doesn't give a shit. ...poor sod.
> 
> Also what's you guys think of Jonathan Kent? I love him. when Alex said she wanted to be a mom, I said, "well Alex I can't make you one yet... but I can give you a kid." And then she was all like ""thanks so much". And then I was like "aww shucks, don't mention it."
> 
> ....
> 
> Anyway Jon is one of my favorite characters in this little fic.
> 
> AND yes I do realize I left you guys with a major cliffhanger! And right before valentines day! The horror. No worries, if it makes you feel better there won't be any answers around the little girl for some time. :) That's fun right?
> 
> OK, sooooo remember to be decent, kind and, courteous to your fellow peers. 
> 
> Cheers!
> 
> ~Chronicles


	5. Even at my worst, I'm best with you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> RECAP:  
> Kara landed on earth without her cousin, Kal-El, taking any notice for unknown reasons. She was taken in by the Danvers but events occurred that resulted in her landing in CADMUS custody and Jeremiah Danvers dead. Alex has spent her life trying to find her and, while she has made progress, has not succeeded. Her failure and Eliza's emotional instability after the incident made her turn to drugs and alcohol. (In this story Hank still found her in the drunk tank). After her last mission goes south, Hank gives her babysitting duty for one Cat Grant. It is here that Alex meets Linda Taylor, assistant to the CEO. Unbeknownst to Alex, Linda is also a genetically modified alien known as K-2SO who is working for CADMUS to take down the terrorist group ALFA. She is also Kara. 
> 
> An attack on Cat's life, has both sides at odds with each other and Alex makes yet another bad call that almost ends badly for Winn. The IT man is understandably upset and giving her the cold shoulder, but he makes fast friends with Linda and vows to help her get her girl.
> 
> Also Jonathan Kent.
> 
> And yeah, Kara apparently has a kid...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow! We're really chuggin along here huh? I'm so grateful for the positive response this story has gotten. Seriously, it means the world to me! You guys are so awesome and I cannot thank you all enough for the kind words. It was brought to my attention that my timeline skills suck, I mean I knew that but I wanted to make sure no one was lost. 
> 
> So for clarification I will try to give a brief update in the chapter summaries going forward and also try to iron out the concrete times. For funzies I'll just let you know that we're roughly 4-5 weeks from where we started in chapter 1. The exact span isn't too important except to know that our character's relationships are not flimsy nothings that developed overnight.
> 
> I'll be There for You- Remembrants(?)

** Even at my worst, I'm best with you **

_ May 2008 _

_It had been 3 months since Kara had found Alexandra Danvers, and she was thoroughly amazed with human living. The bonds of family displayed by the Danvers were just as strong as they had been on Krypton. Having the Danvers be a family felt like having a small piece of Krypton with her. It was something she had very sorely needed considering her last remaining piece refused to answer any communication attempts._

_Alex was very angry with Kal-El, she’d left him several scathing voice messages from her cellular device. It had taken Kara hours of puzzling over the weird technology to understand its purpose. She still couldn’t quite understand why humanity had not simply created holographic crystals yet. They were so much more efficient._

_Jeremiah had said that he had contacted Kal-El’s fiancée and that this Lois Lane had explained that Kal was off world at the moment. Something about a man named Myxzxptlk._

_She had promised to tell Kal if he managed to get in touch with her._

_But time was running out and apparently people were beginning to question Kara’s role in the Danvers family. She was an oddity in the small town of Midvale; a puzzle piece that just did not fit. Alex had been pulled aside 3 times in school so far by the Guidance Counselor; being asked questions like, “are you okay?”, “Is everything going well at home?”, “congratulations on the new house guest, are they a family member?”_

_On top of that, there had been a not so incognito patrol car circling the Danvers’ block. It came at 3:30pm everyday like clockwork. The exact time Alex usually got home. The exact time Kara had liked to wait for the girl on the front porch. After the 3 rd day Kara had been relegated to waiting indoors only._

_Needless to say, it was a tense time for everyone._

“ _So, you’re saying that regeneration was possible on Krypton?” Alex was sitting up in her desk chair, pencil poised over the notebook on her desk as she gaped at Kara._

“ _No.” Kara said, tilting her head at Alex’s crestfallen expression. “I’m saying that regeneration is a common practice on Krypton. And that it is well within the realm of humanity to make this happen. Within your lifetime as well.”_

_Alex’s grin was infectious, and Kara found herself returning the excited smile with one of her own. The brunette tapped her pencil point on the notebook three times, eyes remaining locked on Kara’s before dropping the utensil and speeding over to sit next to Kara on the bed. The blonde was sitting with her ankles crossed, knees drawn up to her chest and arms wrapped securely around them. Alex sitting next to her jostled her enough that she dropped her arms and her legs fell flat._

“ _So, what’s the secret? Like Salamander tails and stuff?” Alex shoulder bumped her, and Kara leaned back into her. She had taken to watching a lot of television in her downtime, which was essentially all her time, so she was well aware of the theories behind salamanders and healing. It was on the right track but not quite._

“ _You enjoy computers correct?”_

“ _Of course.” Alex confirmed. “They make everything a lot easier.”_

_Kara sat up again moving her head back and forth. “Yes and No. Technology is not what makes everything easier per se. More so it is the human master that allows such actions to take place.” She pursed her lips in thought at Alex’s dubious expression. What she had just said was not new information but in relation to the topic she might need a better analogy. “You wish to build your own desktop yes? A supercomputer that can crunch through your biological data faster than the computers at ‘MIT’?”_

“ _Yeah.” Alex conceded, brow furrowed as she tried to follow Kara’s train of thought._

“ _Well consider that you have all the working parts. They are designed to do certain functions, yes? The processor should be the brain, your memory your neural network, your ports your digestive units perhaps. Given all of this, once you have your machine assembled, it will simply sit there awaiting instruction. It has no idea what to do as, in its most primitive form it has no intelligence, no cognitive thinking skills. It is not until you tell your computer what to do, until you give it an operating system, that it functions as you wish.” Kara smiled as Alex’s face began to clear and reached over to grasp the other girl’s hand, leaning closer eagerly. “So, this is how human cells are. Alone, they are insignificant, they do not know their purpose beyond where they were designed to go; where they were designed to fit. As such they need instructions, they need to be told what to do. Your neural network takes care of some of this, but it is … eh… like an “open source” software? It can change based on your environment, diet, or any number of factors. Currently humanity has elicited enough for your systems to survive, they are doing the bare minimum, only as much as they are told to do. You would need a serious “update” to get it to work as efficiently and as deliberately as a Kryptonian.”_

“ _Dude! That is so awesome!” Alex’s hand squeezed hers in excitement, and she pushed forward so that she was completely facing Kara. “So, how would we even begin to process that kind of thing? How would we even start reprogramming our cells.”_

“ _Well you would start where it all started. In your DNA.”_

_//_

* * *

Alex sighed as she maneuvered the lens on her scanning electron microscope. Annoyance coursed through her frame, it had been years, damn near a decade, and she was still a wreck. So much so that using an everyday piece of equipment was enough to set her off on the path down memory lane.

The fact of the matter was that she had barely known Kara. They’d been together for less than a year, and while Kara had latched onto her like a leech during that time, it still shouldn’t have been enough to make this pain last all this time. They’d barely even scratched the surface of each other. But Alex had promised Kara she would protect her, that she wouldn’t let anyone take her away. And Kara had promised Alex that she’d never leave her alone. She’d been a kid; they both had been. Making promises that they had no business making. Promises that had been shattered in less than an hour.

Shoving the thoughts back into her box marked very firmly “Do Not Open”, she redirected her attention to the glass slide she was studying. She’d never stop looking for Kara, for answers into her disappearance, but she still had a job to do.

Her lens focused in on a large cell that was definitely not human and although it was alien in nature, it didn’t resemble anything Alex had ever seen. This was the 10th slide she had looked at today and they all had the same alien presence mixed in somewhere. The samples were all from the hundred victims that she had pulled information on the previous week, as well as from samples she had “borrowed” from Maggie’s cases at the NCPD. These were her last few slides, she’d prepared them all meticulously, isolating and cleaning cell fragments, making sure that she would be able to see the various bodies as cleanly as possible.

There was no possible way that she had made an error. Whoever had been killing these people, both in the DEO investigation and the NCPD cold cases, had been aliens. Which meant this went way beyond what they had initially thought. Combined there were over 300 murders in the past two years that Alex had thought might be related. The same, if not similar alien isotope was found in every sample she had gone through. Which meant that ALFA had been in operation way longer than they originally believed. It meant that ALFA had been able to slip under the radar, despite the DEO having the most up to date tech in the world.

This was the whole reason they were in operation; it’s why they were created. And now, ALFA had a huge head start, and Alex had nothing.

She still couldn’t figure out cause for the murders, and without that information she wouldn’t be able to determine ALFA’s endgame.

All she knew right now was that people were dying, ALFA had a HUGE head start, and they were running out of time.

Pulling her notepads and reports to her chest, she quickly shut down her experiments and left her lab. She found Hank in his office, head bent over his computer screen.

“I made cookies. They’re white chocolate, you should try them.” Her sudden presence did nothing to startle him, and he nodded his head in the direction of his mini fridge. Alex looked at Hank, to the Tupperware sitting on top of the appliance, back to Hank, back to the Cookies. Mind made up, she dropped her papers on his desk and moved over to the sink, scrubbing her hands forcefully with the antibacterial soap. It wasn’t that she thought this would stop her from getting sick, but it at least could be construed as her trying.

Sitting down at the desk with Hank’s cookies clutched to her stomach, Alex began her report findings, Hank’s face remaining as impassive as ever.

“I know you said that you don’t want one of my hairbrained schemes mucking up this op, but Hank I really think we need an inside guy on this one. I can infiltrate ALFA. I could--”

“No.” The word left no room for argument and Hank snatched his cookies away from her.

“You didn’t even let me explain my play though!” She exclaimed, frustration leaking into her voice. This wasn’t fair, they had no information that was useful to them at the moment. Alex could get that intel, she knew she could. She’d done it enough times in the past. And now Hank was what? Suddenly acting like he couldn’t trust her anymore? “If you would just listen to me then--”

“No Alex. I have listened to you. I’ve been listening to you for 5 years now, and every time your ideas get crazier and crazier. Every time you think less with your head, and more with your ego! You want to get yourself killed? Fine. Just don’t do it on company time.” The short speech was concluded with a harsh bite into a cookie, and a refocusing of his attention back to his screen.

Alex sputtered for several minutes before regaining her composure, snatching a cookie and her documents, and storming out of his office.

She loved Hank, she really did, he was a great boss, trained her well, and seriously made her giddy when he cooked (his Cajun rice was the stuff of legends). But right now, just in this moment, she wanted to punch him in his ginormous head!

 _She_ was not a child, and _he_ was not her father.

//

* * *

 

Kara moved steadily through Catco, layout copies clutched in her hands as she made her way to the printing department. Cat had been especially tense today, one of her debutant friends had gone missing and it had put her on edge. As such she had been barking orders at everyone, and Kara had watched her take an alarming amount of her prescription medication. She’d already made up her mind that if Cat reached for the bottle again, she would have to either forcibly remove it from her hand, or call emergency services.

She scratched idly at her watch, and pulled it up to check the time. The green arrows told her she had about 20 minutes to make it back to Cat before she started on another round of harsh critiques. She’d just decided to quicken her stride when a firm hand rounded her bicep and pulled her into the closest stairwell.

“Something’s wrong with Alex.”

Winn’s face was pinched in concern, and he tugged on his tie as he waited for her response.

“Um… Ok? …Why are we whispering?” Confusion swamped the blonde, Winn was being super weird and she also hadn’t noticed anything untoward with the FBI agent; Alex hadn’t said anything to her. “Maybe she’s tired? There was apparently a new development. Ms. Grant said that Eli Mackellan went missing.”

Winn waved his hands and scoffed, continuing to whisper. “MacKellan was cheating on his wife and caught crabs, he’s checked himself into a private facility while he gets treated. He’s got nothing to do with this. _You_ need to talk to her.”

Kara’s eyebrows shot up and she gripped her papers tighter, making sure to keep her voice as low as Winn’s even though she wanted to yell. “What? Why me? I’ve just started being able to not make a fool of myself around her. What makes you think she’ll tell me anything? You should do it!”

“No way, she’s an asshole. You need to figure this out, you’re the one with the crush. And she talks when you feed her. Just give her candy, or maybe buy her lunch. I don’t know, figure it out. I’ll check back in later.”

Winn stepped over to the door, peering out of both sides before casually strolling back towards the main floor.

Kara was left gaping, this was crazy.

 _This was Alex,_ her mind whispered back. Kara wasn’t sure why she was so concerned about the agent but she huffed as she pushed out of the stairwell.

She knew where Cat kept her secret candy stash, she’d have to raid it before she went back to her desk.

//

* * *

 

The banging on her door brought Alex out of her ‘Stranger Things’ binge and back to reality. A reality that was damn sucky. Huffing out an annoyed breath she stood and went over to her door, pulling her gun from the cushions of her one-seater.

Not the safest place for a weapon, but it’s not like Alex had much company over anyway.

Peeking through her peep hole showed her that it was Detective Sawyer darkening her doorstep, and for a second, she reveled in the possibility of telling her to fuck off. That plan was quickly squashed when she saw that the good Detective also carried pizza boxes and a huge jug with her. This was fighting dirty; she couldn’t very well turn down food.

Besides it had been almost two weeks since she’d seen her…

Scowl firmly in place she pulled her door open and glared at her guest. Maggie simply offered her a cutesy dimpled smile and held up her jug.

“Virgin Pina Coladas.” She said, shouldering past Alex and making her way towards the huge bar island. “As my show of support.”

“You didn’t seem very supportive back at the station.” Alex was still frowning out into her hallway but sighed and closed her door before turning to face the inevitable. “You basically told me I suck at life.”

Maggie raised her eyebrow. “Seriously Danvers? I did not say that. I told you that you were a scared little shit. Completely different.”

The smaller brunette opened the top pizza box revealing wings and garlic knots and Alex felt her mouth water. The second box revealed a plain pizza, extra cheese, and if she weren’t so annoyed with Maggie she might have kissed her.

“Not different. Still hurtful.” She grabbed the first slice out of Maggie’s hand, shoving the cheesy goodness into her mouth. This was what happiness was meant to be. She pulled apart a garlic knot for good measure, switching back and forth between the two while Maggie poured out their drinks. “Besides it’s not like your saying anything I don’t already know, you’re just shoving my flaws in my face without giving me a solution. It’s not nice or fair. I don’t tell you how you suck in so many ways.”

The hard eye roll was not warranted Alex thought as Maggie sat next to her. She grabbed the juice out of the other woman’s hand and took a large gulp. Yeah, it was really hard to hold onto her righteous fury with such good things in her belly.

“Listen, if you don’t want me to call you out on your shit, don’t ask me about it. Simple as that. And your solution is also simple: grow a fucking vagina. I get that shitty things have happened to you. Shitty things have happened to everyone, they deal. The way you deal isn’t healthy. You need to find some courage and face your abandonment issues head on. Not everyone is going to leave you Alex… I’m still, here right?”

The patterns in her concrete countertop were swirls and circles. She traced a finger in one and followed the pattern to edge before doing the same in reverse.

Maggie’s shoulder bumped hers and she paused her actions, eyes remaining trained on her finger.

“What happened to Kara was _not_ your fault Alex. And you putting yourself back together, the _right_ way… It’s not gonna happen overnight. You just have to try a little every day, and I’ll be right here ok?” Maggie waited patiently, Alex could feel her gaze intently on the side of her face, until finally Alex was able to give her a small nod. “Have you started looking at any AA meetings?” Another nod. “Do you want me to come with you?” Small head shake. A pause. Tentative nod. “Ok, good. Let me know the time and place and I’ll be there ok? Now that’s done, how about you tell me how the hell you were able to crack my case so quickly?”

Maggie nodded at the plate of wings and Alex pulled one out; they were crispy, just how she liked them. Maggie didn’t eat them, being a vegan herself, so it meant a lot that she remembered small things like how Alex liked her wings.

At least that’s what Alex thought until she bit into one. Yup, that definitely wasn’t chicken. Fooled again.

Smacking her lips slightly at the tacky sauce, she took another bite of the faux buffalo wing and shrugged her shoulders.

“I told you all of your suspects were positioned the same; and there was an oily quality to the blood in the photos. Like when you put oil in water and it makes a rainbow? Same kind of reaction. The chemicals that Thermigarians give off create the same reaction in human blood; our blood being the oil in this case.” She explained, voice slightly rough from her previous bought of emotions.

“So much potential Danvers.” Maggie lamented with a shake of her head. “So, I’m looking for an alien in this case, these Thermigarians. Any idea where I might find one?”

“Lots. But that’s not who we’re looking for.” Alex snatched the last garlic knot from under Maggie’s hand, the detective sending her an impressive scowl as Alex smirked at her. “Thermigarians are big fluff balls eager to please. We need to figure out who’s ordering the hits. Who’s got pull with the local Thermigarian crowd.”

“We?” The other woman was pizza hoarding now, having piled 3 slices onto her plate before Alex could lay claim. She poured herself another glass and raised a puzzled eyebrow at Alex.

“Yeah, apparently your victims are also victims in the case I’m working. Who knew?”

Alex blinked as her pizza and phony chicken was taken away from her; held hostage by one Maggie Sawyer as the brunette looked at her with a weird gleam in her eyes.

“Danvers. I need you to pay close attention to me here ok?” Alex scowled but nodded; that fake chicken had been good, and she did not take kindly to people interrupting her meals. “The victims from my case, you pulled their records and they matched with your case?” Alex nodded, and Maggie’s expression turned gleeful. “Same suspects; same motive?”

Alex tilted her head. “Well, no. Not exactly.” Maggie’s face fell, but Alex continued. “There are a few different suspects per murder, and I haven’t been able to suss out the motive yet. So far, your department has about 13% of all the actual cases, but this is something that’s going on worldwide. And it all leads back to ALFA.”

“ALFA? Like the terrorist group?”

“Yes.”

“Do you know what this means?”

“No.”

“Dude! I can finally make an honest woman out of you! Show you how to solve real mysteries without being a complete ass about it. This is gonna be epic!”

Alex frowned as she pulled her drink closer to her, Maggie’s hands were flailing just a bit to widely for her liking.

“I solve mysteries all the time, and I am not an ass about it.”

“First step is admittance Danvers.”

“….”

“…”

“Fine. What did you have in mind?”

“A stakeout is always the 1st step. We find a Thermigarian squad--”

“Huddle.”

“—And we do some surveillance. Find out what they know; gather intel. Step one is easy but boring, after that we can consider some undercover work.”

“Thermigarian _huddles_ aren’t the easiest to find Sawyer.”

“Well that’s why we have you. Duh.”

“I don’t know where they’d be, I’d have to make some calls.”

“You literally just said you had plenty of ideas. Why are you turning away from this?”

Alex sighed, shaking out her shoulders as she stood and turned away from her companion.

“I don’t know ok? It’s just… Hank told me to work my op. He said not to do anything reckless. This seems like it might go sideways.”

Maggie stood now too, walking around the column in the middle of the apartment so that she was face to face with the red head.

“Look, I’m not saying that Hank isn’t right in his overall assessment of your character but this? Alex this is child’s play. This is secret agent 101. And I’ll be there as your backup, Hank can’t have a problem with this.

Alex sighed, glancing up at Maggie, before peeking back down at her Slytherin socks. Maggie had a point. Surveillance was easy. Hank couldn’t get mad about them getting intel the old-fashioned way. She wouldn’t make a character, no costumes, just microphones and vans. Cliché. Old fashioned. Safe.

Maggie’s face was patient and her eyes were very very brown. In another life Alex imagined, she would have easily fallen for the detective. Only Maggie couldn’t tell her ass from her head, she was so into Kate. Didn’t stop Alex from noticing her though.

“Let me make some calls.”

//

* * *

 

Linda’s grin was just a bit too manic for Alex to deal with at seven am on a Tuesday. The blonde was clutching a box of nerds and a coffee in her hands and was steadily approaching her position by Cat’s elevator.

Freaked out didn’t even begin to cover how she felt. Honestly, who ate candy at seven am?

“Hi Alex!” Yep way to chipper. And Pitchy. When did Linda’s voice get so damn pitchy? “Good morning! How was your night?”

Seriously? Alex had worn her most somber clothing; black slacks and dark blue dress shirt neatly pressed. The black jacket she wore completed her “please leave me the fuck alone” ensemble. Yet here she was being greeted by sunshine itself.

Alex winced. “Lower Linda, less please. Your voice is…” The blonde’s face fell, and Alex felt her stomach drop. Crap. “No. Not in a bad way. Your voice is beautiful. I meant that my brain has not reached the capacity where it can handle a good mood right now.”

And yeah, she was really liking how easy it was to make Linda Taylor blush.

“Oh, um sorry. I just…” The blonde ducked her head and thrust the items in her hands towards Alex. “I thought you might like a coffee, and I also uh, saw these while I was at Noonan’s.”

Alex smothered the smirk that threatened to take over her face and uncrossed her arms to accept both offerings. “You found Nerds at Noonan’s?”

Linda shifted from foot to foot, pulling on her fingers as she tried to maintain eye contact with Alex. “Um they were having a special?” The blonde’s eyes shifted to something behind Alex and she seemed to firm. So: Winn. “I mean, they were on special. And I heard that you liked Nerds so I got them for you. Because I saw that you maybe looked a little distracted lately? Like maybe something happened.”

Alex raised her eyebrows as she continued to listen to Linda ramble on, taking a pull from the coffee cup in her hand. Hmmm, Caramel Macchiato. Delicious.

“You think I’m distracted? Did Cat say that?”

The blonde’s eyes bulged, and she waved her hands frantically. “NO! No, she didn’t say that! Not distracted like you can’t do your job! I just meant… Like maybe distracted like you were sad? Not that I’m watching you! I mean I could be watching you, but I’m not because privacy and …. I mean…”

And so, it continued, the hole that Linda was digging was impressive and Alex felt slightly bad, but then she remembered how Linda had so thoroughly trounced her in their first real conversation and the amusement came back. Plus, Winn was watching his spy crash and burn before his eyes so: bonus points.

“Not that you have wrinkles! Your skin is flawless, you’re beautiful. I mean not like I’m propositioning you! I don’t… Oh golly!” Alex nearly choked on her coffee at that one. “I just wanted to make sure you were okay.”

And there it was. Alex’s stupid idiotic conscience. Dammit.

“Hey, no. I’m fine, I promise. I’m just… I’m a little tense about the case is all.” She tucked the Nerds into the crook of her arm, and reached out to touch Linda’s elbow with her now free hand. “You don’t have to worry ok?”

Linda bit her lip and shifted closer to Alex, opening her mouth to say something else.

“Lidia!”

And then Cat Grant made her presence known. The elevator door was barely opened and the media mogul was already listing things she wanted done. Linda shot her an apologetic look and immediately ran to trail after Cat.

Alex took another drink from her cup. Who knew caramel coffee tasted so good.

//

* * *

 

Winn had pulled her into the Men’s room as soon as she was finished with Cat and Kara was trying very hard not to touch anything.

“Are you kidding me? That was a disaster!” Winn’s hands tugged at his hair and he paced in front of her, creating tiny mohawks in his normally sleek style. “I’ve never seen something so spectacular. Did you even breathe?”

A flushing sound interrupted Winn’s rant and Rob in Print emerged from a stall, glancing between them warily as he hurriedly washed his hands and took his leave.

Kara shifted nervously, tugging on the sleeves of her polka dotted blouse. “Winn, I’m really not supposed to be in here, pretty sure it’s a lawsuit of some sort.”

A glare was her only response. The door to the bathroom opened again and Winn turned his glare on the newcomer.

“It’s occupied!”

The man balked and scurried back out the door.

“I’m sorry!” Geez, for such a small man Winn could sure be intimidating. “I panicked ok? She’s just… And I’m--”

“Oh please!” Winn interrupted, waving his hands as he cut her off. “Don’t even give me that! You’re Linda Taylor; you’re super funny, adorably awkward, have an awesome personality, fit the profile for hottest woman alive, and you’re the nicest person I know! You’re reading her favorite books for Christ sake! You don’t get to pull the woe is me card, ‘I’m so sad because everyone is cooler than me’.” He said mockingly, grabbing her shoulders as he leaned into her personal space. “Alex Danvers would be lucky to have you. Get the hell over that low self-esteem bull crap and get in the damn game Taylor! Do you have this?”

Kara nodded shakily, feeling weirdly inspired and duty bound as she started trying to formulate her next plan of action. “Yes sir.”

Winn blinked at her, confusion marring his face before he split into a shit eating grin. “Awesome! Let me know as soon you figure it out!”

A swift pat to her shoulder and he was gone, the bathroom door closing solidly behind him.

Kara exhaled slowly, that had been intense.

A high-pitched whistle followed by several other not so pleasant sounds filled the area and a sudden stench coated the air.

_Oh Rao!_

She really hated Winn sometimes.

//

* * *

 

Linda’s hands fidgeted in front of her as she tried for, what Alex was sure she meant to be, a confident look. “So how about a movie night? I mean if you’re not busy?”

Alex smirked, choosing to ignore the false bravado, as she nodded her assent. “Sounds good.

_Some hours later._

Alex chose _A League of Their Own;_ a fictional movie detailing the true stories surrounding the creation of one of the first women’s baseball leagues. While the movie wasn’t one of her favorites, it still held a special place in her heart for its strong female relationships. She found the lack of female antagonism for no real reason absolutely refreshing.

It also had the added effect of distracting Linda from whatever mission Winn had set her on.

“So, she dropped the ball? After being the best player the whole movie? She just drops the ball?” Linda’s voice was incredulous as she pointed at the television. Dottie, the lead character, congratulating her little sister Kit on beating her team in the championships, only seeming to increase her irritation.

“Did she really _drop_ the ball?”

“ _Yes!_ You literally just saw it happen. It was complete crap!”

Alex smirked, easing further into her couch cushions as Linda continued to rant.

Danvers 2- Taylor 1.

//

* * *

 

“You will eliminate this target.” The tech handed over a picture. Kara glanced down at the picture before resuming her attention posture. “We’re loading the necessary information into your phone. Make sure it gets done on time.”

Recognizing the dismissal, Kara tipped her head and left the room.

Another DEO agent.

There was something wrong, the DEO was not known for being alien friendly and now she had a second agent who had been in contact with ALFA? Something didn’t feel right.

Frown in place, she made her way down to her cell. Normally she would be trying to get as far away from there as possible, but she really needed to talk to Katu.

The brunette was currently sitting cross-legged in her cell, twisting her hair and humming along to some song.

Kara sighed and sat in front of the glass separating their cells.

Katu was in a mood, or she would be. She tended to lean towards annoyed when she worked with her hair. Something about needing better access to a hair masque.

“Whadayya want Ponyboy?”

The reference went over Kara’s head but at least they had moved passed the preliminaries.

“I need some advice on Agent Danvers. More social interactions have been less than... optimal.”

Katu grunted barely chancing a glance at her as she gathered the completed twists in her hands, pulling them back and up into an intricate knot at the base of her skull.

“That’s cause you're trying too hard. You’re going at this like it’s a mission and you need to go at it like you actually want to get to know the girl.”

“But,” Kara started glancing around her at the various mics positioned in their holding cells. “I _do_ want to get to know her. I need to if I am to determine her intentions.”

“Yeah ok.” Katu rolled her eyes and moved into an easy handstand, the gravity causing her shirt to fall down around her torso and expose her rather impressive chest. Kara’s eyes remained diligently on the dark skin of her abdomen, she was no stranger to Katu’s body, the woman having basically no sense of modesty, but that didn’t mean she wanted to look. “Whatever you have to tell yourself sweetheart.”

“Katu--”

“What do you need Kara? Huh? You want a pep talk or something?” Katu came down from her handstand, shifting to a Cobra’s pose and glaring at her companion in clear annoyance. “You want me to tell you that some things are worth trying? You’re an agent of CADMUS. You don’t get a happy ending kid. All you get are brief moments of contentment; pauses in the chaos that these assholes have created and you are _wasting_ it. Do you wanna know the last time I saw my husband? They slit his damn throat! They made me watch him bleed out in front of me. I loved him more than--” Katu cut herself off, eyes glassy and throat clogged with tears as she took a moment to gather herself. “And I would do it all over again. I would do _everything_ if it meant being happy with him for even a _second._ So, you do not get to be a coward. You don’t get to hide.  You don't get to let them control _everything._ ” Katu’s eyes bore into hers, blood dripping from her nose. **I know who you Kara. I know who you are on a mission and I know who you are when you’re not. You don’t consider her a job.**

Kara blinked at her, head pounding as an electrical current went through Katu’s room. The older woman flinched, closing her eyes and breathing heavily through her obvious pain. Panting, they both sat there, recovering from the effects of both Katu’s telepathy and CADMUS’ punishment.

Finally, Katu looked up, wiping the blood from her nose and focusing back on Kara.

“Look, has she told you to scram yet?”

The blonde’s eyes tracked Katu’s move into split, continuing to watch the brunette work her muscles. She was constantly doing these routine’s, citing that she needed to remain limber so that she could be ready for her ‘window’. It made a lot more sense now.

“No, but she could just be being nice.”

“Are you nice?”

“Very.” Kara’s face remained impassive because she _was_ nice.

“Right.” Katu responded because she _knew_ Kara was nice. “But you’re also a kiss ass. You don’t like displeasing people. Does this Alex give a shit?”

“No.”

“Then there you have it. She hasn’t asked you to stop making a fool of yourself, that generally means that she doesn’t mind your very annoying presence.”

“…”

“…”

“You’re a… jerk… face.”

“I love you too pumpkin. Stop trying to play a part; you’re not K-2SO, be who _you_ are Kara. The rest of it will fall in place.”

“… I bribed Pynne. Thought you were getting a little too skinny.”

Katu grinned, her expression turning gleeful at the thought of smuggled sweets. “Well you know what they say, “stay safe, eat cake.””

//

* * *

 

Kara frowned down at her tablet, although her eyes continued to track Alex over her glasses. The agent had been out of sorts for almost two weeks now and Winn’s concern had reached past annoying. Not that Kara wasn’t also concerned. She actually enjoyed the surly agent’s company. Alex had a quick wit and an easy smile; she was always trying to make the people around her safe and comfortable. Except maybe for Steve down in accounting, Kara had feared for that man’s hands on more than one occasion. …And ok, maybe it wasn’t really _everyone,_ but she’d always done her best to make _Linda Taylor_ feel safe and comfortable. She pretty much glared at everyone else.

But Kara was certain she’d give her life for any of them.

Except maybe Steve.

The signs weren’t obvious; Alex was very good at playing her cards close to her chest (Winn had taught her that saying). But Kara had become quite adept at reading the agent. Her hands shook sometimes, although that had been less and less of an occurrence, something that happened now only when Alex was especially upset about something. Like Steve in accounting. And although she still smiled, it didn’t quite reach her eyes; although to be fair, it never really had. Her eyes remained stormy, there was no Alex Danvers sparkle that had showed on rare occasions. Not that Kara had noticed she had a sparkle. That wasn’t her job to notice such things. It was just an observation. Not a notice. Different. Obviously.

Still, Alex was frustrated about something and it was past time that Kara sucked it up and asked her what it was.

The private elevator dinged, and an Agent stepped off. Kara had seen the woman around a few times when she managed to stay late. Usually Cat kicked her out before the shift change, but the CEO was too busy talking Gwyneth Paltrow off a ledge to have noticed that Kara had stayed past her scheduled time. The new agent nodded at Alex and moved closer to her so that they could debrief. Agent Jones was a sharp woman, her dark eyes darting back and forth constantly. Her posture was always alert and her uniform always expertly pressed. But she had snuck Kara sweets on numerous occasions, saying she was too skinny and needed to get some meat on her bones. Kara had meat on her bones. She hadn’t understood, but the kind smile that stretched the woman’s dark skin had always made her feel at ease. So, she’d taken the candy. She hadn’t wanted to be rude is all.

Quickly she gathered her things, trying to act like this had not been her plan all along; like she hadn’t just been waiting for Alex.

She fixed a nonchalant expression on her face as she moved around her desk, listening intently for any signs that Alex was being held up. She frowned when she stepped up to the elevator, the floor long since emptied, and pressed the button for down. Maybe she should have waited longer? No. Kara was good at this. She’d killed enough people with this technique to doubt herself now.

Only the elevator doors were opening, and Alex still wasn’t there. Maybe she _had_ misjudged?

Grudgingly she made her way into the steel chamber and pressed the button for the ground floor. She’d have to chat with the security guard downstairs; wait for Alex that way.

A hand jammed between the doors before they could fully shut.

“What? You don’t even say goodbye anymore?” Alex pried the doors back open and pushed her way in, her smile still easy but her eyes showing her exhaustion.

“Sorry.” Kara couldn’t contain her own smile, and nervously adjusted her glasses. Plan A had been a success. “You seemed busy and I didn’t want Cat to catch me still in the building.”

Alex laughed. “No, we wouldn’t want that. Do you mind if I walked you home? So that Cat doesn’t kill me if something happened to you?”

Normally Kara would turn her down. Today this was like a gift laid before her feet.

“No, yeah that would be great actually. Thank you.”

Alex smiled again and gently steered her out of the elevator with a hand at the small of her back.

“Trust me, this is more for my piece of mind than yours. Some of your co-workers are a little too handsy for my tastes.”

Kara offered her an amused smile. “You mean Steve?”

“Among others.” Alex conceded, happy grin in place as they stepped out onto the street, the sun just beginning to set, casting pretty hues of red and purple across the sky. “So how was your day?” The agent continued. “Did you talk to anyone interesting?”

 _Yes._ Kara thought, replaying her conversations with Winn.

“Not really,” is what she settled on. “I was honestly a little distracted.”

Alex’s face turned concerned. “By what? Everything ok?”

“No.” At Alex’s alarm she hurriedly raised her hands and shook her head. “I mean yes! I’m ok! With me, it is ok. I was talking about you. I was worried about you. If that’s ok? I mean I know we’ve only known each other for a few months but I mean… I just... ugh!” She was a genius by human standards! Why oh why did she turn into a stuttering imbecile around this woman?

A squeeze brought her attention down to her and Alex’s now joined hands.

“Hey,” the agent soothed. “It’s fine Linda. You’re good. I was worried enough to offer to walk you home, you’re allowed to worry too. Although I’m not sure _exactly_ why you would be worried.”

Kara took a moment to look at Alex. The woman’s hair gave off beautiful red hues in the dying light and her face was open and honest. It was one of the things that Kara appreciated most; Alex didn’t tell her everything, but she hadn’t lied yet. Kara would have known if she did. The shocking revelation that she trusted this woman threw her for a second before she found her footing again.

“I just… I saw how frustrated you’ve seemed in the past few days and I wanted you to know… if there’s anything I can do Alex, you just need to tell me, and I promise I’ll try to help.” Heat flooded her cheeks, that was a bit more emotional than she had intended. A tug on her hand made her stop in the middle of the sidewalk, Alex moving them off to the side, so they didn’t block traffic.

Alex’s face was melancholy as she stared at Kara, and the blonde found herself biting her bottom lip as she did the same. They were close, and it allowed Kara to see the golden flecks on Alex’s irises even with her glasses hindering her sight. Finally, Alex sighed, taking a step away from her; which was just as well as it had been getting slightly difficult for Kara to think correctly.

“I’m fine Linda. I promise. It’s just this case is becoming a bit of a nuisance and, unless you know where I can find a huddle of Thermigarians, then I’m stuck.” The agent shrugged hopelessly, before turning to make her way back onto the street.

This time it was Kara’s hand that tugged her back.

She’d wanted Alex to not be like the Cadmus agents; to see that aliens and metas weren’t all evil. Because if anything good was going to come out of this, maybe that could be it. Maybe she could at least save Alex. This was her chance.

It was a risk. A huge risk.

But she thought maybe…

Maybe Alex would be worth it.

_Please Rao, let her be worth it._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YAY! Kara's trusting again! Opening up outside of her own CADMUS stamped identity. I can't wait for you guys to read the next chapter, I've been sitting on it for so long, it's one of the ones I wrote when this story was first thought up. le sigh. We're gonna start seeing a lot more flashbacks so more and more things are going to make sense and we're gonna pick up some steam of this badass train.
> 
> Also, what did you guys think about the Winn/Kara scenes? Not gonna lie I pulled the inspo from an ep of Grey's Anatomy where Richard Webber is trying to get Meredith to spy on Bailey for him. Those scenes made me die of laughter so I gifted them to you all. You're welcome :).
> 
> And, if you have NOT seen a League of Their Own. GO SEE IT NOW. Seriously, it's amazing. It's life changing. It's so good. And, since I already spoiled it in the story, DOTTIE DID DROP THE BALL OF PURPOSE!!! I'm sorry I just get really emotional.
> 
> Lastly, I'm not a vegan but I'm trying to stay true to the characters, so if any of you vegans out there see something I messed up on, please feel free to comment. I'm basically drawing from the random food my sister makes me try or from the stuff I cook when I'm trying to surprise her with dinner.
> 
> Inspiration was also drawn from two fix on here: Dare121's Coffee on Wednesday's and a story I'm in the middle of by Alsike, Knives and Fire. Both have Hank as some sort of cook, and pairing that with the canon of him and Alex eating cookies in his cell when he outs himself... well I just couldn't resist giving him some southern creole charm. After all he was lost in a rain forest right? He had to have picked up something.
> 
> (Both are great reads and if you haven't read them yet, you definitely should!)
> 
> Alright, see you guys in two weeks. This hiatus is killing me.
> 
> Rule of thumb: Just you know, don't be an asshole.
> 
> ~Chronicles


	6. I'm Surprised That You've Never Been Told Before (that you're lovely, and you're perfect)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Recap from Last Chapter:  
> Young Kara explained regeneration to a young Alex.
> 
> Alex discovered that most of the murders that had been taking place around the globe were alien related. Meaning the terrorist group ALFA had way more connections and power than originally thought. This is way more than just a Cat Grant assassination. But when she tried to get Hank on board with yet another plan that would put her in danger, he shot her down. And took away the cookies.
> 
> Winn solicited Kara to be his spy. She failed miserably and Alex's amusement (and affection) reached never before seen levels.
> 
> Alex and Maggie decide to team up on a case after a semi emotional make up.
> 
> Kara asked Katu for assistance in getting closer to Alex. Katu told her to woman the fuck up. Also told her to stop pretending she thought of Alex as a case. She did not think of Alex as a case.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> .... hi....  
>  So what had happened was: I decided on Friday to take a completely random weekend trip (yes I was sober, no I was not alone), got lost, was probably almost stolen away by some men at a sandwich shop, met up with an old friend who is in the air force, got lost some more, saw someone passed out in broad daylight, was concerned, tried to make sure person was not dead, person was not dead just very high and very angry, ran away, literally accidentally walked into the middle of a fight between a white supremacist, a cop, and a black guy, made it back home, went to work and then hibernated for the past two days... so yeah that was fun.
> 
> And then I couldn't think of a good chapter title...
> 
> Sorry?
> 
> Chapter beta'd by Keziah  
> Song: FNT by Semisonic

** I'm Surprised That You've Never Been Told Before (that you're lovely, and you're perfect) **

 

Alex was nervous.

It wouldn’t be the first time, but the feeling always made her uncomfortable.  Made her want to turn tail and head back in the opposite direction.  Find a safe place and ride out the storm.

But Linda’s hand was warm in hers and the brown eyes that kept glancing back at her over a cardigan covered shoulder made her want to continue.

There was also the matter of finding the Thermigarians to consider.

When Linda had haltingly explained that she knew where they could find aliens, Alex had been suspicious. 

Obviously. 

But the blonde’s eyes had been scared; she’d been afraid of what Alex would think of her, what she would _do_ to her.  The thought made Alex feel sick, and she tightened her grip as Linda pulled them down a side street. 

There was someone, maybe even a group of someone’s, who had hurt Linda.  Had made her afraid.  Alex wasn’t sure what had happened but whatever it was, she knew it was bad.  Bad enough for Linda to make her promise not to hurt anyone they came across; for her to ask Alex to get the information she needed without drawing her weapon.

It hadn’t been an easy promise to make, but Linda had assured her she’d be beside her the whole time.  That she’d help her. 

She’d sent a quick text to Maggie just in case they needed to find her body.

No way was she telling Hank.  He’d have her head.

Nevertheless Alex also tried to keep track of her location, they’d moved quite a ways from their original location at Catco.  Linda had taken her on the underground rail, and they’d gotten off at Chinatown.  The Shoppe’s there were crowded and close together, as were its inhabitants.  Navigating the hordes of people had forced Linda to take her hand.  An arrangement that Alex had not been sad about at all.  She liked the feel of Linda’s skin.  It was soft… and it made her stomach feel warm…

Right.  Not here.  Or anywhere for that matter.  She’d promised Hank.  No sex while on business.  Besides she didn’t even know if Linda was gay, the woman was a walking ad for girl next door who is on the honor roll and band. 

Although maybe not, because she hadn’t read Harry Potter, and what kind of honor student doesn’t read Harry Potter?

None she knew of.

And even if Linda was into girls, why the hell would she pick Alex?  She was a walking bomb.  Everything she touched imploded; she’d managed to fuck up everything she ever cared about.  Linda didn’t deserve someone like that.  She deserved someone like Winn.  Winn wouldn’t hurt her.  Winn wouldn’t fuck her and leave her.  Alex would.  That was all she was good for; all she ever did.

Her self-loathing fest was interrupted when Linda stopped in front of a funny looking wooden fence, and glanced back at her with a nod.

“We’re here.”

Well shit.  She had _not_ been paying attention those last few turns.

Linda offered her a small smile and tilted her head in the direction of the fence.

What the hell?  They were all gonna die one day right?  Besides, Alex like Linda.  She trusted Linda.

Well as much as she trusted anyone she’d only known for a few months…

She released a slow breath and did a quick shake to remove the tension in her body before nodding to her companion that she was ready.  When this was over, she thought, Linda was going to have to explain how she knew where this place existed.

Linda released her hand and stepped up the fence, knocking softly on the wood, a gentle tapping rhythm that Alex had been sure no one could even hear.  She tried to make out if there was a pattern to the knocks but couldn’t really find one.  It had just been a knock.  Three of them.  And then a pet?  Had she just pet the fence?  Ok.  Maybe Linda really was crazy.  Maybe Alex needed to get the hell out of dodge.  If she went through this secret fence there was no guarantee she was getting back out.  …But if she left there was no way she was getting back in; those knocks had been super nondescript.  There was probably a password or a who’s who kind of thing to actually get in.

But then the fence was moving.  Moving like in fucking Harry Potter and this was the damn three broomsticks!

And then the ‘fence’ _yawned_ and rolled out into what looked like a very large teddy bear.  Linda beamed at it and started talking in a gibberish language that Alex could definitely not understand.  But she could identify it.

This was a Xioarian!  They were speaking Xarlish!

The teddy bear’s face was affixed with what could only be described as a grumpy pout as it looked over at Alex.  Linda stepped back over to her and reached for her hand, continuing to speak Xarlish as she looked imploringly up at the Xioarian.

“What’s he saying?” Alex asked, making sure to keep her eyes on the teddy bear and her hands where he could see them.

Linda frowned.  “He says he doesn’t know you.  He wants to know why he should trust you; what you want here.”  The blonde squeezed her hand and said some more Xarlish words.  “I told him that you work for the FBI and that you want to know who’s been taking aliens.”

Alex’s eyes bugged and she broke her rule to turn shocked eyes to Linda.  Trust _broken_.

“It’s ok.” The blonde rushed out, tugging her minutely closer.  “It’s best to just be honest, they can tell when you’re trying to hide something.”  Linda’s eyes screamed to trust her, and Alex grudgingly nodded.  It’s not like there was much she could do about it anyway.

Besides, apparently she was right as the Xioarian was much more friendly after learning she was here to find missing aliens (she wasn’t; had no clue any had been missing until just now).

Linda did a quick complicated looking bow and with a smile they moved beyond the fence bear and into yet another alley.

“Sorry about Bob.  He’s just cranky because the neighborhood kids keep drawing on him.”

“Bob?  Seriously?  Is this the part where you tell me he’s just a big teddy bear and he wouldn’t hurt me?”

“Of course not.”  Linda murmured, clearly distracted.  “He’s the gatekeeper.  If he thought you were here to do harm, he’d eat you.”

Alex stopped and was nearly dragged when Linda kept walking.  Strong girl.

“Eat me?  Like just pick me up and put me in his mouth?”

Linda looked her over as she too halted.  What exactly was she looking for?  “Well I wouldn’t let him.”

“No, yeah.  Feel totally safe now.  Thanks.”

“Alex…”  Linda sighed, looking half amused and half exasperated.  “You’re the one who wanted to come here.”

Alex pulled her hand away, folding her arms and tucking her hands into her armpits.

“Not to be eaten.”

Linda smiled and reached her hands out to grasp Alex gently by the biceps.  “I’m not worried Harry…”

Alex glared at her before relenting.

“I’m with you…”  Alex sighed.  “I’m gonna regret telling you about Harry Potter aren’t I?”

Linda let out a soft huff that could have been a laugh and held out her hand again.

“You coming?”

Another 5 minutes and they were now in a sprawling tent city. 

Also, Alex was freaking the hell out.

Aliens she had never even seen were walking around in broad daylight (well twilight, but same difference) mingling with other species.  They looked like they were just laughing and chatting, a quiet neighborhood block party.  If that even existed.

And then one of them spotted Linda and all hell broke loose.

Several aliens broke away from conversations, games, and other activities to greet the blushing woman.  Linda was cordial, if overly embarrassed and her hand never left Alex’s.

Next thing she knew they were being guided to a large picnic table at the back of the neighborhood party.  Much farther from the exit.  Her hands were starting to sweat and she quickly did a full assessment of the layout of the area.

She’d just spotted a Thermigarian and was half out of her seat when a plate of food was laid on her lap.

Gross looking food.

Food that looked like squid and eyeballs and old moldy eggs.

“It’s hansu; fruit.”  Linda whispered to her, leaning close so that she could be heard over the din.  “It’s a vegetarian plate from Cantu.  They weren’t sure if you were a carnivorous human.”  When she pulled back there was a twinkle in her eye that clearly told Alex she was messing with her, but she couldn’t think past the way Linda’s breath had felt on her neck.

“These are fruit?” Was her genius reply.

Linda nodded.  “They taste better than they look I promise… It’s um kind of rude if you don’t at least try it.”

Alex looked down at her plate and then raised as her head to look at the expectant alien who had handed her the food. 

Krishars were odd looking creatures.  They had the body and shape of a human but no visible face or ears or mouth.  These features were only visible when they wanted to use them for something.  The current Krishar had decided to use its usually nonvisible mouth to bare its teeth at Alex.  She was totally going to die.

“Her name is Ni’t*l’inia.  She says you can call her Ni.  She’s smiling to make you more comfortable.”

Oh, of course. 

The muscles in her face felt strained as she tried to return the smile.  She was 1000% sure it didn’t work quite the way it was supposed to.  Looking back down at her plate she picked up the moldy egg and tentatively touched it with her tongue, studiously ignoring Linda’s highly amused face staring at her.

When her tongue didn’t disintegrate into ash, she bit a small piece and was rewarded with a burst of flavor.  They didn’t taste like any one fruit Alex had ever had.  More like a mixture of a few, and _fresh_.  She eagerly bit into the rest of the moldy egg and allowed the flavor to wash over her again.  The small giggle from Linda drew her eyes back over to her companion and she smiled sheepishly.  Ni shot her a pleased look, (at least Alex thought it was pleased, it was still just fangs staring at her) and moved on from their seats.

Linda offered her a small smile and began to dig into her own plate.

“This is really good.”  Alex ceded.  “That needing to eat thing is that just a Krishar courtesy or…”  She picked up some of the squid-like fruit and ate it.  It was like an Italian icee met a fruit smoothie and had a baby gusher. 

She moaned in happiness and picked up the last piece of food on her plate.

And promptly spit it back into her hand.

Yeah that tasted like shit.

Linda giggled and offered her a handkerchief.

Alex smiled, what a gentlewoman.

“No.  It’s not exactly any one culture per se… I guess it’s more that it’s fairly difficult for them to grow or acquire food that wasting any is seen as a crime.”

Alex frowned and looked back over at the crowd of people that had easily welcomed strangers into their midst.  She watched Ni set a plate in front of three adorable blue baby wolf like creatures that she had no idea of their origins.  The wolf aliens let out a small cheep and immediately shoved their face into the bowl, before a larger humanoid creature placed a gentle but firm hand across their backs.  The newcomer was tall, at least 7 feet still seated, and looked like it was made of electricity.  The wolves ate at a more sedate pace after the contact.

“They’re from Nalgene; their home world was taken over by the Mandalorian invaders.  Nalgene hadn’t yet mastered the science of intergalactic travel so there aren’t many of them left, and the ones that are left have been changed, like that.”

Alex watched the family in front of her, the small wolves now running around the larger Nalgenean(?). 

“They look alright to me.  They’re happy and alive, what more could you really want?”

Linda smiled wistfully but remained silent.

Alex looked at her for a moment taking in her expression.  Linda Taylor had certainly given her way more to think about than she already had.  It wasn’t just a matter of how Linda knew where to find this place; it was also about how she knew these aliens, these beings.  How had she learned their languages?  Why did she look so _bereft?_

Swallowing Alex stood and moved over to the wolves, smiling at their mother(?) and offering them the rest of her fruit.  She felt more than saw the being beam at her in thanks, and then the tiny creatures were running around her ankles and jumping on her legs.  Where they touched she felt a spark of joy and gratitude.  She staggered back to Linda on unsteady legs and knew she’d made the right choice when the other woman looked at her like Alex had just given _her_ a gift.

* * *

 

Bringing Alex here had not been a bad decision so far.  She had been very pleased to see that her trust had not been placed irresponsibly.

Following Katu’s advice to befriend Alex for her it’s own merit rather than just as a CADMUS lackey had been slightly daunting and she had been afraid of making any missteps. 

This had not been a misstep.

She’d even found the extreme concentration on Alex’s face as she led her through the crowds amusing.  The agents face had been the epitome of focus; her eyebrows furrowed, eyes darting back in forth as she took in every detail of her surroundings.  Katu would say that Alex needed to get laid and, while the thought made Kara blush to her ear tips, she did agree that Alex needed to relax a little bit.  She was always tense, always alert.  Like Kara.  She deserved more from life than always having to look over her shoulder. 

But then Alex’s mouth had gone slack when Kara had woken up Bob, and Kara had been more determined than ever to show Alex that not all aliens were evil.  And to get her to relax and have fun.

Katu had reminded her how few moments they got to truly be themselves.  Kara was safe here, as safe as she could be anyway, and there was no way she was letting anything happen to Alex.  Being here, in the only place that had ever felt 'safe', never failed to put her at ease.  They could have tonight.

Besides she was no longer worried about whether Alex would freak out or not.

So far, the red head had not done much aside from try not to gawk at the assortment of new species that Kara had exposed her to.  Kara found it adorable, especially when Alex’s eyes would get wide and she’d duck her head to hide the heat coloring her cheeks in embarrassment.  Kara had studied human mannerisms extensively before being sent out on this assignment, and she knew from her teachings that staring was frowned upon.  Krypton hadn’t allowed it much either; only on the first meeting so that one could fully assess their new acquaintance. 

Alex asking about the Nalger’s had brought the familiar sense of loss and heartache that came when she thought about how she had lost her own people.  She’d visited Nalger as a child, had seen the way the creatures had danced and glowed within their bioluminescent fields.  Floating dust turning into stars at every leap and twist.  They’d laughed rainbows into existence.  The colors had been magical.

And now seeing Fiora eat with her children, their aura’s dim and empty brought her back to her own people.  To Krypton’s tall crystal spires, to Rao’s grandeur outside her bedroom window.  It was gone now, everything she’d ever known.  And there was no one she could talk to about it; no way for her to hold onto her memories.  Those belonged to Cadmus now.

She didn’t even notice that she’d been scratching idly at the raised skin behind her ear that housed her implant until Ni returned and trilled at them.

Alex looked bewildered but Kara just smiled and shook her head.  She should have known it wouldn’t work as soon enough more and more chants rose, all in the same trill that was used by Ni’s people.  It was handy living with other species, you tended to pick up on other dialects fairly well.

A blush came over her face when she took Alex’s hand in hers and pointedly tipped her chin 30 degrees  towards the auburn beauty.  The chanting stopped abruptly after that, even if there were some good natured rumbles.  Alex peered at her quizzically but Kara determinedly ignored her.  There was no way she was explaining the gesture she had just made to Alex.  She’d basically just laid claim on the woman!

“They’re giving thanks.”  She whispered instead, moving still closer to Alex so that their shoulders were pressed together.  She didn’t know why, but the contact grounded her; brought back her focus.  “It’s the ritual dance of Xantu.” Alex squeezed her hand, both of them focused as Ni led the small group in a series of movements.  Night had well and truly set, and a fire had been lit to stave off the cold.  Ni and her group danced in front of the flames.  Kara was reminded strongly of the humans known as gypsies.

“What does it mean?”  Alex’s quiet voice pulled her from her thoughts and she turned to look at the woman’s profile.  The red hues in Alex’s hair were even more visible in the firelight, the flames reflecting vividly in her green-brown eyes.  The agent was still dressed in her ‘work clothes’ a soft grey sweater under her black blazer, complete with black slacks and boots.  A completely intimidating outfit that Kara was hard pressed not to be distracted by.

Alex was staring straight ahead, her short hair framing her jawline perfectly, her throat clearly visible.  Apparently Kara took longer than normal to answer because Alex was soon turning to look at her.  The blonde swallowed, trying to wet her suddenly dry throat and refocused on the dance in front of her. 

“In the beginning we were all scattered.  Nalger’s, Xioarians, Thermigarians, humans… everyone; no one was able to communicate.  We were alone.  Xantu is how we found each other.  It’s a mutual respect; a desire to accept and be accepted.  It was started on Krypton; the Kryptonians were arrogant and prideful but they tried to respect all species, no matter their differing views.  They dance and sing to honor those who helped them find each other; they promise to continue on this journey, to bridge the gaps and become one.”

“No shit?”

“No shit.” Kara answered ruefully, a smile dancing on her lips.

Alex smiled back and transferred her attention back on the dancers.  “And what about the bad aliens; the murderers?  What happens to them in this ‘Xantu’?  Or is it more of that ‘we are family’ crap?”

“Why is it crap?” Kara asked, head tilting in confusion.  “We are a family.  Xantu is about being one, a part of a whole.  That’s what family is.”

Alex squinted her eyes, peering at Kara for an indiscernible amount of time.  Had she said something wrong?  She went through their conversation and felt herself relax minutely.  Nothing she had said could be construed as offensive, or weird.  She had stated the truth.

“You really believe that don’t you?”  Alex asked incredulously.  “You buy into that whole ‘everybody’s got good in them’ bullshit.  I mean you do realize that there’s currently an alien terrorist group hell bent on killing your boss right?  By definition I’d say that that is decidedly ‘not good’.”

Kara frowned, a tense air entering their once calm bubble as she considered Alex’s questions.  “What do you mean?  There are humans that kill people too.”  Kara countered.  She felt Alex stiffen next to her and clenched her jaw.  “There are bad people everywhere Alex, it’s not just an alien characteristic.”

“I _know_ that.  That’s not what I’m saying.  I’m not talking about anyone who kills in self-defense or anything like that.  But I know for a fact that Mandalorians are raised to kill.  Their whole ideology is to conquer and destroy; best warrior wins it all.  They enslave and rape their victims.  You’re telling me you would want to “become one people” with them?”  Alex had turned her body to face Kara more fully, voice rife with frustration and anger.

“And you are suddenly omniscient enough to be judge and jury?  Who are you to condemn anyone to exile?  I’m not saying that everyone is good, but just because they aren’t _good_ it doesn’t automatically make them evil.”

“You’re seriously telling me you’d be ok sharing a meal— _dancing –_ with a Mandalorian?  Or even say, a human like Lex Luthor?”

“If they were no longer a threat, then yes.”

“Oh, that is such _bullshit!”_

“People can’t help how they’re raised.”  Kara pulled her hand from Alex’s, fidgeting with her glasses before hugging herself and sinking forward.  “Just because you’re taught to do things, doesn’t mean that’s what you want to do.  It just means that’s what you have to do; or what you feel you have to do.  Sometimes you just need someone to take a chance on you.  To find a better way.”  Alex opened her mouth to protest, indignation on her face.  Kara fixed her with a fierce stare and continued before she could be interrupted.  “Fiera was saved by a Mandalorian.  She said the boy was about 16, just past the age where he would have been allowed to keep his catch.  He smuggled her to his ship and took them through a wormhole to reach earth.  He was killed in the attack, lasted just long enough to land the ship.  And her children, the Nalgene’s you fed today?  The ones you thought were ‘cute’?  They’re naturally carnivorous.  Ni made them promise to not eat humans in exchange for amnesty.  Their freedom meant more to them than their cultural diet.”  She shook her head in agitation, feeling disappointment course through her at Alex’s words.  “It’s not fair for you to make blanket statements Alex.  Your judgement is not necessary or warranted; you don’t know what you’re talking about.  You’re not always right.  You don’t always _have to be_ right.”

Alex’s jaw clicked shut and she quickly turned back to look out at the festivities.

“Awfully convenient.”  The agent clenched her fingers but kept her eyes forward, her entire body tensed in anger.  “That he saved them.  You sure that’s a real story?”

Annoyance surged hot in her veins and she found she couldn’t even look at the agent.  She’d tried.

She’d brought Alex here on the assumption that maybe she would be able to see that not all aliens were evil; that for the most part they were just doing what was necessary to survive.  She knew some of the actions being taken were wrong, but honestly, the humans had forced their hand.

Alex didn’t see it like that though.  It was seldom the abuser who saw that they were causing pain.

The abused didn’t have the luxury of memory loss.

Kara was a special case.

“You’re acting like a child.”  Kara pinched her eyes closed and slowly released the tension in her body on an exhale.  “I won’t talk to you like this.  You can’t hate someone for trying to be better.  You can’t be mad at everything and everyone.  And if that’s what you want, then fine.  But I refuse to be a part of your pity party.”  Her legs ached with the burn of frustration that usually came when she walked away from a fight, instead of engaging.  She made her way over to Ni, taking her place besides the Krishar.  Ni let out a high-pitched whistle, and Kara allowed herself a small smile in acknowledgement as she started to follow the steps of the dance.  She needed to calm down.  She needed to stay in control.  She fingered her watch, the contact immediately releasing some of the pent up energy in her and helping her to further relax.

Alex hadn’t been able to hear Ni because her human’s ears weren’t sensitive enough.  But she could have still tried.  Still found a way to make it work.  Hate only got you so far. 

And being angry was useless.  She’d spent enough years at CADMUS to know what anger earned you.  If you wanted anything to change you had to start by understanding the people around you.  By learning what their motives were.

For whatever reason, it wasn’t something Alex was interested in doing at the moment.

And she did feel badly for how Alex was reacting; for hurting her.  But the truth remained.

Not everyone had had a choice in how they grew up.  Not everyone had the luxury of being able to hate.

* * *

 

_Dr. Thawne stood in the observation deck, his finger going down a list as he explained things to the technician by his side.  It was times like this that Kara wished she didn’t have super hearing.  That Kal-El had shown up, even if only to show her how to control her abilities._

_She tried to focus on her own heartbeat as a blaring buzzer sounded and flashing red lights filled the room.  They hurt her eyes._

_“We need to break her.  She needs to understand that she belongs to us now.”_

_“Sir, every test we have run has proven her to be unsuscept--”_

_“Then increase the pressure!”_

_The machine in front of her groaned and she forced her head to the side, tearing the metal head straps like they were so much tissue paper.  She tried to pull her hands free as well, but she was too slow, and the metal slab that had been descending pressed her more firmly into the steel table she was laid on.  The metal was cold.  Kara couldn’t remember the last time she had been cold.  Krypton had been so hot those last few months._

_There was a sharp grating sound and she choked out a gasp as the metal pressed her harder into the table; felt the steel give slightly._

_“What is your name?”_

_She squirmed, seeking to get away from the cold metal that she was becoming trapped in._

_“My name is Kara.”  She imagined her Aunt Astra smiling at her; telling her how proud she was._

_“Increase the pressure.”_

_The metal groaned some more, and Kara could see with her x ray vision how the parts in the motor were working overtime to exert more force on her body._

**_Due to the power we draw from Earth’s yellow sun, you will have extraordinary abilities on Earth my love.  You’ll be safe there Kara._ **

_She fought back the tears that burned her eyes.  She would not cry.  She would not dishonor her family.  She was Kara Zor-El: Scion to the Great House of El, Last daughter of Krypton.  She would be brave._

_Metal creaked and groaned around her, the alloy melting and molding around her form.  If it couldn’t destroy her, it would entomb her._

_“Your name!?”_

_Her breath came in heavy pants; there was barely any light left.  She was on earth.  She was not in the Phantom Zone.  She’d made it to earth._

_“ **Kara**!”_

_The metal collapsed around her, sealing her in darkness._

* * *

 

Linda was beautiful.  Truly.

The greenish blue baby doll dress she was wearing was odd but adorable, covered in baby birds.  She’d left the light pink cardigan she’d been wearing by Alex and the agent couldn’t help her fingers stroking over the material.

Alex watched from the sidelines as the woman danced with the group of aliens, her body swaying and bobbing around.  It was both graceful and clumsy; with some movements seeming almost picturesque and some seeming like a child made them up.  It seemed almost tribal in nature, and the nerdy part of her wished for a camera so she could compare the movements to the ancient tribes of earth.  She and Winn had a running bet on whether or not aliens had helped earth’s early inhabitants.  This might help solidify Winn’s argument that they had, and that all of the ancient tech that had seemingly been lost with ‘Atlantis’ and ‘Lemuria’ were actually just the aliens leaving.

Linda and her friends laughed whole heartedly as the chanting picked up and Alex found herself captivated.

And angry.

Very angry.

She thought back on Linda’s words and thought they belied a naivete that Linda should have long outgrown.  The woman was working for Cat Grant for goodness sake.  Surely that should have dulled her optimism.  Because there _were_ killers out there.  There were bad people.  And they shouldn’t be afforded the same luxuries as people who tried to be good!  They didn’t deserve it.  It shouldn’t be about ‘giving them a chance’.  For what?!?  People don’t change.  Once a rapist, always a rapist.  Once an abuser, always an abuser.  Once a murderer, always a murderer.  Reasons didn’t matter to a mourning family.

Alex clenched her hands, shoving the shaking appendages into her jacket pockets.  One of the aliens did a headstand and Linda laughed again, strong and clear.  It made Alex even angrier.  Who was she to speak to Alex like that?  If anyone knew how far down the rabbit hole went, it was Alex.

She’d hurt enough people- failed enough people, to know that there was no redemption.  There was no fucking healing light that came and washed away all of your sins.  Once you allowed yourself to breach that world, you were tainted for life.  You forfeit any right you had to forgiveness… to happiness.

A brush at her ankle had her looking down and she found a Nalgene wolf pup staring back up at her.  She wondered idly how they grew, as the adult definitely had a more human body.  The Nalgene hopped up on her lap, pawing at her jacket and snuffling at her pockets.

It really was cute.

“Hey,” she whispered, glancing up to make sure Linda was still occupied.  “I’m sorry I don’t have any more food.”  The puppy dog looks this creature gave her was seriously a weapon.  Alex literally felt herself melt into a puddle of goo.  “I’m really sorry.  I wasn’t exactly planning on coming here, I’m a little unprepared.”  She reached out her hand, scratching lightly at the Nalgene’s chin.  “Do you have a name?”

The creature cheeped at her and she frowned.  Yeah, that was not useful at all.

“He says you may call him Champion of the Ladies.”  The rough amused voice came from directly over her and Alex’s head shot up… and then more up… very awkward neck crick forming.  The Thermigarian was much larger than she had anticipated, and its breath was not as bad as she had thought, smelling only very mildly of swamp.  The large creature crouched and blew gently at Alex’s upturned head.  “Is this better for you, human?”

Alex swallowed and, clutching the Nalgene to her chest, spun around to face the alien.  Reptilian in nature, Thermigarians shared the innate ability to camouflage in with their surroundings, something that had irked Maggie to no end when they had been trying to find one.  And now here one was, talking to her.  Wait.  It was _talking_ to her.

“I’m sorry, what?”  Horrible first impression!  She was making a horrible first impression!  This was all Linda’s fault with her stupid comments and her “blah blah blah, your wrong Alex blah blah blah”.  Not to mention her gorgeous eyes, and beautiful hair, and really nice ass… No!  Not thinking about Linda.  She was a federal agent dammit!  “I mean, not what.  Not… Thank you, for…”  She gestured vaguely at their obvious height difference and the Thermigarian’s nostrils flared.  “Um, Champion of the Ladies you say?  Is that a real thing?”  She peered down at the Nalgene, who had apparently decided that chewing on the cuff of Alex’s favorite leather jacket was the cool thing to do.  He stopped however at her question, cheeping indignantly at her.

“I’d say you have your answer human.”  The Thermigarian’s nostrils fluttered wildly and if Alex hadn’t done _extensive_ research on the species she would have thought he (she?) was going to eat her.  But she had so she knew, that was almost a laugh… maybe…

“Right.  Sorry, um Champion of the Ladies.  That was my bad.”  The Nalgene, Champ, huffed at her but spun in a few lap circles before curling up to fall asleep.  Yep.  Literal Alex Puddle.  “My name is Alex by the way.  Not human.”

She looked back up at the Thermigarian and away from the pile of adorable in an attempt to sculpt herself into a semblance of a woman again.

It’s large reptilian head was tilted in amusement and she watched its tongue flick out before quickly retreating into its mouth.  It was ‘tasting’ her emotions.  They did that to gauge their enemies.

“I see Alex by the way.  You may call me Yreifpkl.”

“No, not ‘Alex by the way’.  Just Alex”

Yreifpkl nodded her (his?) assent.  Gender neutral.  That’s what she was gonna go with.  Less confusing.  Yreifpkl smiled as if they had heard her thoughts but said nothing.

“I have a boon I would ask of you Just Alex.”  This time Alex knew she was being played and didn’t bother with a correction.  “My people… I fear something has its eye on them.  Slowly our youth are disappearing.  We have lost 2 this month.  There’s no contact after they go volveri.”

The fur under her finger tips felt like physical contentment.  “What’s ‘volveri’?”

“When our youth reach a certain age, they are given the right to start out on their own.  Form their own connections; make their own way in the world.”

“Hmmm.” This was so nice.  “Well no offense, but when I was ready to leave my human mom, I totally ditched.  Barely contacted her my first year away.”

Yreifpkl’s lids closed bilaterally and Alex blinked in amazement.  That was so cool up close.  Everything was so cool here.

“No offense to you human but our people are not yours.  We believe in community; they would have contacted us.  Something is happening to them, and with this form and your human prejudices I cannot go look for them myself.  And it is not only my people, the Ficori are also reporting missing youth.  I was told you were here to help.  Was I misinformed?”

Champ yipped from her lap and wiggled out of her grip to land on the floor.  Just like that Alex understood the irritation that was clearly visible in Yreifpkl’s face.

“Wait you said the youth were missing, like from multiple races?”  She glanced over at Champ, rubbing her hands slowly in thought.  Right, apparently Nalgene’s were emotional manipulators.  Little shits. 

“Yes.  I was very clear when I said this.  Someone is taking our children!”  Yreifpkl’s temper burst and she had to force herself not to recoil.  The Thermigarian felt like they weren’t being heard, that was on Alex.

“No, I heard you.  Just confirming…”  Thermigarian’s were killing people, humans.  ALFA was a radical extremist set of alien terrorists.  Alien teens were going missing.  They were being recruited.  “Was there any one place that your children go to?”  She asked, her head snapping up to meet Yreifpkl’s.  “Anywhere they would go before you lost contact?  Or anyone they spoke about?”

Yreifpkl sat further back on their haunches, eye’s sliding closed.

“Usukan.”

The answer came from a woman, a beautiful creature with skin painted in shades of blue.  Darker blue tattoos flowed in random swirls and lines across her body, and all came to a meeting point at her eyes; obsidian in color and showing no visible sclera.  The woman smiled, her cat like nose quivering slightly before she gracefully sat next to the Thermigarian.  She was shorter than Alex, but her presence still made the agent sit taller.  The woman commanded respect.

“The name Usukan has been whispered on the winds.  We have not been able to determine who he is or what he wants.  We just know that he does not like your kind; that he wishes no harm to aliens.”

Alex frowned.  “Do you know if that is his actual name or an alias?”  She asked, mind working rapidly.

At the graceful, slightly carefree shrug from the blue lady (daboo di daboo da), Alex forced her brain to think about the case.  Usukan was a name she hadn’t really heard since her dad had been alive.  Jeremiah had been big into constellations, and the way different cultures interpreted them.  One such culture was the Mayan.  He’d taken her and her mom to Honduras once, showing them the pyramids and telling grand stories of warriors and Gods.  At only 8, she’d thought he was magical, and had been terrified of the more dastardly ‘Gods’ in his stories.  One such God was named Usukan.  He and his brothers hated humanity, had sworn to do everything in their power to destroy humans, and although they never succeeded, Alex had still been frightened. 

She wasn’t now.

And she doubted the person they were talking about was the actual God Usukan.  Diana may have fights with her uncle every few decades but that didn’t mean that was the rule.  It was the exception.  Which meant that they were looking for someone who liked history primarily; someone who enjoyed studying mythology and ancient cultures.

She really missed Winn right now.

“So, you will help us Just Alex?”

Yreifpkl had leaned forward, teeth bared, and tiny ears flattened across the skull.  It was a move born of anxiety and Alex realized that they were scared.  They all were.  And they thought she was going to help them.  They thought she was going to _save_ them; to save their children.  Her heart pounded roughly in her chest and her hands started shaking again.  She needed to calm down, she needed to breathe, she needed…

A warm hand settled on the back of her neck, long fingers gently prodding at the hollows behind her ears before dropping to lightly tap at the joints of her cervical spine.  She exhaled slowly, feeling some of the tension drift away.

“She’ll do her best; I promise we’ll keep an ear out for any information we can get.”  Linda’s voice was clear and strong, and Alex felt herself relax even more, head drooping and allowing some of her weight to go back into Linda’s hand.

Her answer seemed to have satisfied the majority of the crowd as slowly the aliens broke off to continue their dancing.  Still others stayed behind to talk to Alex.  They asked her questions (did humans really eat each other?  Why did their women always wear war paint?  Why did they procreate so often and so voraciously?) and told her stories.  Wonderful stories.  Sad stories.  Funny stories.  She heard it all.

One young boy told the story of how much he loved school, pointing at Yreifpkl as his teacher.  Telling her stories of his lessons and how his classmate had accidentally ripped a hole in the dimensions.  Apparently Yreifpkl had yanked him back to this realm before any real damage could be done, but now the child couldn’t turn left, and his hair stood up at odd angles.  The boy, a creature that vaguely resembled the tv show character Ralph, thought this was extremely funny.  Alex was stuck on ‘ripped a hole in the dimension’.

An older alien complimented her on her socks and kept trying to touch her ankles.

Yet another alien, who Alex could not determine any real characteristics about, besides the fact that it looked like a tree, asked her if human boys were any good at the sex.  She said she had done vast research on the topic and while she thought the practice very weird, it was something she was willing to try.  Alex answered her questions as best she could, but then the girl started to go into detail about things like length and texture and Alex quickly moved onto another alien.  Her face was flaming by the end of the exchange and she vowed to never, ever have sex again.  Not if people were going to ask her questions like this. 

Ni told her, with Linda interpreting, how her planet had been destroyed during one of Earth’s ‘space missions’.  Apparently when the Russians and Americans were battling in the race to space, they’d taken to shooting empty projectiles into the abyss.  Some of those projectiles had somehow traveled far enough to reach and do serious damage to Ni’s home world, and her people had fled to escape the devastation.  Ni said she had been very angry at humanity at first, their reckless behavior and thoughtless actions had nearly cost her everything.  But then, she said as she gestured around her at the host of other aliens, earth had also blessed her with a new family.  So maybe they weren’t so bad after all.  She asked Alex to speak to her leaders and have them practice safer and more humane ways to explore the outer reaches of their galaxy.

And there were many more who voiced different request; different things they thought Alex could provide.

They thought Alex could save them.  They believed that she could help them. 

Her.

Alex.

She felt like she was suffocating.

A soft murmur from her right and the crowd dispersed, leaving Alex to her thoughts.

Linda’s hand dropped from her neck to her shoulders and she nudged Alex gently.   “You ok?”

Alex had never been able to save anybody.

“Not really.”

She looked up, her eye’s bearing into clear brown.  There was something about this girl; this woman.  She felt like she could breathe around her. 

The blonde was frowning, a soft furrow forming between her eyebrows and Alex smiled.  She’d gotten her intel, she could have this.  Just for a second she could let herself have this.

“Will you teach me that dance you were doing?”  She asked, turning to press her cheek to the hand on her shoulder and trapping the appendage.

Linda blushed adorably.  Linda liked her.  Winn had said so.  A quick glance at her feet showed that Champ was touching her again.  She smiled.  Little shit.

“Oh um no.” 

Alex blinked, Champ or no, she had not been expecting that.  She pulled her face away, feeling heat flood her cheeks and ears.  Great, Winn was an idiot and Champ was a manipulative jerk.

“No!  I- That’s not what I meant.  I just- that dance that I did, that’s _earned._ I couldn’t teach it to you, unless _you_ earned it.”  The babbling blonde pulled her lip between her teeth before grasping Alex’s forearm and tugging her up.  “But I can show you something else.  If you want?”

Alex nodded breathlessly as she was tugged closer to Linda, their hands grasped loosely, and the other woman moved them into position.  She smelled like a flower… vanilla maybe?  No something more… more.  Alex had to stop herself from leaning in closer; normally at this part of the night she was deciding where and how to touch to get what she wanted.  This wasn’t like before, and not just because Hank had told her to keep it in her pants.  Linda was smiling softly at her, her face open and honest as she gently squeezed her hands.

“Ok, so just uh do what I do, and what I say.  Ok?”  A nod.  “Ok. So right foot goes behind where my right leg would be.”  Linda moved with Alex, bringing her right leg to the spot just vacated by Alex’s.  “And now repeat with the left.  Meet in the middle, palms up and…”  Linda’s hands met her, arms a sharp v as she was lightly pushed back and away, Linda slowly moving and swaying.  She moved leisurely, making sure that Alex was able to copy and keep up with her until they were just doing the same movements on repeat.  Alex was a quick learner and soon they were dancing in earnest, the other aliens jumping in and pulling Alex in all different directions.  They twisted, turned, and spun her, tossing her in the air and chanting steadily.

“We dance for your victory.”  Linda said to her when they met again, before being spun away.  Alex ducked under a swinging arm, rolling smoothly over a Jaris’ back, and meeting Linda again.  “We dance for your joy.”  The blonde’s face was bright and open as Alex spun her and dipped her in her arms.  A decidedly human dance move, but Alex couldn’t help it.

Because this was different.  This was challenging everything she’d ever known; had ever expected to know.  Linda had shared this with _her_. 

Linda had _trusted_ this with her.

And her brain hurt, and her head was full, but she was ok.  Right now, in this moment—Linda’s clear brown eyes glowing in mirth, breath hitting Alex’s cheek just so—she was ok.  She could freak out later.

She walked Linda home not too long after that.  Ni had forced a hideous red scarf around her neck.  Linda had said she called Alex irresponsible and had made her promise to take better care of herself.  Alex had been too afraid of the pointy teeth to decline.  She _had_ asked Linda why _she_ wasn’t forced into a scarf.

“Because I’m an adult.”

The response had earned her a hard shove from Alex.

Most of the walk home was quiet, with Alex just thinking through everything she had seen and heard that night.  This was so weird.  She didn’t know where to put these emotions so, she just cataloged all her thoughts, trying to organize them for later perusal.

Linda shoulder bumping her brought her back to the present.  They were in front of the blonde’s building.  End of the line.

Mind still racing, Alex offered a quick smile.  “Thank you.  For tonight.  It was…  I’m sorry if you thought I was an ass earlier.” She sighed, glancing down at her black boots, and then raising her eyes to Linda’s.  “You were right, I had no right to make blanket statements.  I just… I don’t see the world the way you do.  I don’t know _anyone_ who sees the world the way you do.”

A blush took over the blonde’s face and she ducked her head.  “I… is that bad?”

“No.  I don’t think so.”  Alex responded contemplatively.  “But there _are_ dangerous people out there Linda.  There are people who are cruel and would sooner use you than help you.  They need to be known for who they are so that they can’t hurt anyone else.  To not act against them would be irresponsible.  Can you at least _try_ to see what I’m saying?  I’m not trying to make you angry.  I just… I don’t want you hurt…  I don’t want someone to take advantage of you due to blind ignorance. 

Linda’s eyes flashed, and then a wry smile came to her lips.  “Well, it is hard to overcome being a bigot I guess.”  Her smile widened when Alex scowled at her and she reached out to grasp Alex’s hand.  “It’s not easy, going against everything you were taught.  If you never learned tolerance, someone can hardly be angry at you for not practicing it.  Righteous anger is hardly every _tolerant._ …This isn’t about you being wrong or right Alex, its about giving people a little wiggle room; allowing someone the space to exist within your own rigid thought space.  It’s not easy and it’s not always gratifying but it’s just more productive; it’s better than being angry and defensive all the time.  I’m still learning too… and sometimes I forget... but then I usually go see Ni and she kicks some sense back into me.  Don’t worry, I’ll help you however I can.  Even if that means taking you back to Ni.”

Alex shuddered, and Linda let out a beautiful laugh.

The blonde squeezed her hand gently.  “Thank you for apologizing, I am sorry too.  If I offended you.  I never want to make you angry.”

Oh yeah.  This was dangerous.

“Hey, I have a question.”  She desperately needed a topic change; their conversation was going nowhere and it was making her beyond uncomfortable.  At Linda’s nod she continued.  “The Nalgers… Champ looked like a baby wolf but his mom, she looked like us, just made of energy.  Was that the change you were talking about?”

“No.”  The blonde shifted slightly, bringing one hand up to push a stray strand of hair out of her face.  Alex was grateful for the act, she’d almost done it herself.  “The Nalgers are a more evolved species.  They are born as tribal creatures.  Their history states that there are multiple children of Lilian, the mother.  Lilian is one, is all.  She gave birth to a child of might and loved them dearly, they grew and prospered in laughter and love.  As the child aged however, it grew restless.  There had been many changes in the world, and at every change new things were learned; conflicting ideas, conflicting knowledge…  It started to drive the child insane, and a deep depression was felt in Lilian as she watched her child descend to madness.  To save them, she split them into 12 individual beings, dividing them based on ideas, sexuality, morals, and so forth.  Each being took the shape of a creature of the land and, once again happy, made their own children to revel in the joy they had reclaimed.  Fiera’s tribe was of the wolves; they are her totem and so her children are made in that image.  And Champ is not a ‘he’.  They have currently chosen to take the form of a male, but they will not need to decide any trivial things such as gender until their Making day.”

How neat.

“So, you’re telling me he- _they_ can just change gender?  Whenever it pleases them?”

Linda nodded.  “Yes, until their Making day.  They will also choose their permanent forms, and find a mate worthy of their character.  It is thought to be too much pressure on the young to make them decide so early the entirety of their lives.  Which is why Nalgers are believed to be the happiest creatures in the Marsan system.”

“Hmmmm.”  Alex squeezed her hand and smiled innocently.  “Any chance you’re going to tell me how you know all of this?  How you knew where to find them?  Knew their languages?”

The smile of Linda’s face was wistful, almost sad and Alex almost wished she hadn’t brought it up.  Hadn’t said anything.

“Maybe one day ‘Just’ Alex.”  The blonde quipped, squeezing her companions hand back.  “As soon as you tell me why you’re so obsessed with balls.”

“What?!?”  Alex flushed, trying and failing to form a coherent response.  “I’m not!”  She finally sputtered much to Linda’s apparent amusement.  “I don’t—I mean—No.  Just no.  I--”

“You are constantly bouncing them, or squeezing them.  I see you in the office all the time; your hands always have balls in them.”

Alex blinked owlishly, and felt more heat flood her face and more incoherent sentences leave her mouth.

Linda smiled shyly, looking at Alex under her eyelashes.  “You’re babbling is very adorable.  It makes you even prettier.”

“…”

“…”

“You uh…”  Alex started, reaching with her free hand and rubbing her eyebrow.  “You’re not really supposed to point that out.”

It was Linda’s turn to blink owlishly.  “I’m not?”

Feeling more like herself, Alex shook her head.  “No.  You’re not.  Shows your hand; lets the other person know what you’re feeling.”

An adorable crinkle appeared between the blonde’s eyebrows.  “Oh.”

Linda _liked_ her.

“Oh.” Alex repeated with an amused smile.  “I’ll see you around Linda.”  She leaned forward and pressed a light kiss to the woman’s cheek, walking backward when her lips left the soft skin.

When their hands lost contact Alex felt like she’d lost something, and she didn’t think she was alone by the way Linda kept fidgeting with the fingers Alex had been grasping.  “Goodnight.”  She said with a small wave.

Linda returned the sentiment and turned around; she had her door unlocked and was inside the building before Alex could say anything else.

Her fingers tingled, and she still smelt the other woman on her clothes.

Fuck, she thought as she turned to walk to her apartment.

She was so fucked.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, so this chapter had lot in terms of detail but no so much longevity. It will all be important though, I promise. Also, these two dweebs might actually be getting their crap together. Yay!
> 
> Thank you all for your kind comments and kudos and bookmarks etc. They truly do serve as great motivation. You're all stars.
> 
> Also: Jessica Jones.
> 
> Also: This hiatus is killing me.


	7. Don't wanna let you down (but I am hell bound)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the last chapter we saw:
> 
> Kara brought Alex to an alien refugee camp and introduced her to all of her friends. Alex needed to find a Thermigarian and she found a whole alien city living right under her nose. Speaking to Yreifpkl, she discovered that the Thermigarians were being recruited when they turned of age. Young impressionable minds and all that. She also made a cute little friend in Champ.
> 
> Alex and Kara had a little difference of opinions on whether or not people deserved to be forgiven, or redeemed. Things were said, but at the end of the day of kids apologized and kissed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, my lovelies. Guess what? Movin away from the angst in this chapter. We also get a little teensy peek into Alex's past. Also, sorry for the delay, just got back from seeing Tomb Raider. It surprised me. Wasn't amazing but still pretty good. #proud.
> 
> As always, Beta'd by the lovely Keziah.
> 
> Demons- Imagine Dragons

** Don't wanna let you down (but I am hell bound) **

“Hey guys!”

Her greeting was met with a startled yelp from Kate, and Maggie quickly grabbing her gun from the coffee table, her arm bracing her fiancée behind her.  Both women had taken fighting stances, but Alex ignored them as she finished crawling through the window in favor of raiding Maggie’s cabinets.  She almost fist pumped when she came across the Twinkies, tearing open a package and devouring one of the sponge cakes in rapid order.  Maggie never ate Twinkies, these must be Kate’s.  What a nice girlfriend Maggie was to have gotten Kate Twinkies.  They were so good.

“There is a door Danvers.  Normal people use doors.  They knock.”

Alex nodded around the food in her mouth.  “Yeah, but I forgot your apartment number.  Couldn’t think.  I’m kind of busy.  Thinking that is.  I found that Thermigarian we wanted, thought you’d like an update.”

Kate sighed with exasperated fondness, not even caring that Maggie was trying to cover her bra covered chest with the throw from the couch.  Alex personally didn’t blame Maggie.  If Kate was her girlfriend, the woman would be in a burlap sack for the rest of her life.  Not everyone had an hourglass figure complete with defined muscle tone, but somehow Kate Kane had managed to pull it off.  The woman wasn’t sporting a six pack but she was clearly fit.  The high cheekbones, fine bone structure, and full lips all wrapped in olive skin certainly made people stare.  Luckily for Maggie, Alex’s mind was way too preoccupied to check out her girlfriend’s rack.  Also, she generally didn’t go around perving on women.  Ethics and all that.

Kate leaned in and gently pressed a kiss to Maggie’s reddened cheek.  “She’s freaking out love.”

“’m not fruggun ut” Alex argued around her second Twinkie, shoving the box under her arm and grabbing a water from the fridge.

Maggie rolled her eyes.  “Why are you freaking out?”

Alex scowled, putting down her bounty and going back to the fridge for the pickles.

“Oh shit!”  Maggie pulled away from Kate, clambering over the couch as she ran over to take the jar from Alex’s hands.  “Danvers!  What the hell happened?!  You’re eating like a pregnant lady!”

“Am not!  The sugar helps my brain function.”

“Yeah, right before it crashes.”  Kate’s slightly accented voice was soothing as she joined them at the counter, her hand reaching up to rub at Alex’s shoulder.  “What happened Alex?  Who do I need to beat up?”

Alex made a grab at the jar, but Maggie held it behind her back and her own personal space issues prevented her from wrestling her friend for it.  So not fair.  Instead she crossed her arms over her chest and glared at a spot over their shoulders.

“I told you, I found the Thermigarian.  Apparently, they’re being recruited, we need to find the recruiter; that’s our next step.”

Maggie and Kate exchanged a look, Maggie setting the pickles down out of Alex’s immediate reach and gently cupped her friend’s biceps instead.  “Ok?  And how did you find them?”

Alex frowned, digging her shoe into a crack in the wood floor.  “A… friend.  She knew where I might find someone who knew someone.”

“A friend?” Maggie asked dubiously, Kate finally pulling her discarded sweater over her head.  “Do I know this lady friend?”

Emotions slammed into Alex from nowhere, way too much and too fast for her to compartmentalize as she normally did, at just the thought of Linda.  She could do nothing but heave a deep breath and stare helplessly at Maggie, trying to convey with her eyes just how not okay this situation was becoming.  As it was, spiders had crawled up her throat and rendered her incapable of speech and she felt a little like puking.

Because Linda was beautiful.

And kind.

And funny.

And she trusted Alex.

… so maybe not so smart.

“Oh. Oh wow.”  A small smile came to the detective’s lips as she tugged the other woman into a loose hug.  “Wow Danvers.”

“Other words please.”  Alex pleaded, posture stiff and voice muffled by the Latina’s hair.  She actually felt tears sting her eyes and she groaned in frustration.  “Something useful if possible.”

Kate gently separated them, pressing a hot mug into Alex’s hands and leading her back to the couch.

“What’s her name?”  The red head asked as she positioned Alex between herself and Maggie, long fingers carding through Alex’s own reddish locks.

Alex stared resolutely down into the hot chocolate Kate had just given her, the tiny marshmallows easing something inside her chest. 

“Linda”, she supplied.  Names were easy; she could do names.  “She called me a bigot.”  She frowned down into the cup.  “At least I think she called me a bigot.  Maybe I was projecting.”  She took a sip of the hot liquid, the chocolate and Kate’s hands in her hair doing much to calm her down, even as she remembered Linda’s angry face.  “No, she definitely called me a bigot.” She concluded with a slight smile.

“And that’s got you in this big of a tizzy?  Told you, you were a masochist Danvers.”  Maggie’s smug grin was knocked off her face by Kate’s hand hitting her upside her head.  The detective scowled, rubbing the injured area and continuing in an offended voice.  “It’s true!  Every other woman who’s shown the slightest interest in our lovely little Sheldon gets the arm’s length special.  This Linda calls Alex on her shit, and we’re trying to stop a panic attack.”

“I’m not a masochist.”  Alex hedged, bringing her mug closer to her face.  “Linda’s just different… she’s… and then… but I…”  Alex sighed, taking a large gulp from the cup and slouching further into the couch.

Kate’s giggle interrupted her thoughts of Linda and she turned to the other woman with a destitute expression.  “Oh sweetie.  You’ve got it so bad.”

“She’s so nice Kate.  Like annoyingly nice.  Like one of those weirdos that says good morning to everyone and means it, nice.  And thoughtful.  She brings me coffee because she thinks I’m better than the coffee in the staff lounge!  She thinks I’m better than coffee. I don’t even… Winn said she liked me.  Who even does that?”

“She ‘even does that’.”  The socialite returned, gently brushing strands of hair out of Alex’s eyes.  “Lots of people ‘does’ that.  You’ve just never really paid attention; your mind has always worked way faster than your heart.”

Alex frowned but allowed Kate to pull her closer, so her head was on her chest.  Her personal space issues had never applied to Kate.  She wasn’t sure why, just that the older woman had never made her feel anything but safe.

They’d first met through Oliver.  Back when she was doing her undergrad at MIT and had needed to complete an end of year project for one of the grants she’d wanted.  It just so happened that one Felicity Smoak was also a genius, albeit in a completely different field.  The grant worked by bringing together teams of the brightest young minds in the world, set on solving a major world crisis.  The winner was awarded scholarship money that Alex had desperately wanted for her own off campus apartment.  The dorms had been especially gross with so many people sharing the same space.

Felicity had been her spirit animal; a goth after her own heart.  She and Alex had made quick friends, but had lost the grant to a Ray Palmer and Barbara Gordon.  Felicity still held a grudge.

Ray hadn’t even been invited to her and Oliver’s wedding, despite them being longtime rivals and sort of friends. 

When Felicity had started dating Oliver, Alex had just been approached by Hank.  Felicity was older than Alex, which may have been the reason that she was able to get her act together quicker.  Alex’s spiral happening as quickly as Felicity was able to go blonde.  The first few months at the DEO had been beyond hard, and Alex had thought of quitting on numerous occasions.  Felicity, seeing the stress that her friend was under and wanting to help, had invited her to a weekend in Starling City to meet the boyfriend and relax.  She had known better than to use the words ‘girl time’ or ‘spa’ around Alex, even the slightest hint of something Alex deemed ‘girly’ made the agent run for the heels. 

A night of epic debauchery had followed.  Oliver had taken one look at her and his little sister in the closet, and had promptly tried to murder her.  She’d held her own; Thea yelling obscenities at her overbearing brother as she chased him with an honest to god katana.  Oliver had been just livid enough for Alex to get in a good enough hit to knock him on his ass.  He had not been pleased.  Thea had been ecstatic but had told her, her footwork was still sloppy.

A training regimen had been born.

Except what Thea had in fighting skills, she sorely lacked in teaching skills.  It had taken months of persuasion from Thea, Felicity and Alex to get Oliver to teach her what he knew.  And even then, it had come with a promise to stop ‘corrupting his little sister’.”

Alex had had to hold back several comments about that.  Although to be fair, what he had caught her doing to Thea—with Thea—was kind of extreme.  Thea had wanted to try something that required… flexibility, and Alex was a people pleaser in the bedroom.  She couldn’t really blame Oliver for being scarred or for his demands.

She’d agreed of course; both she and Thea had needed easy, there had never been any strings.  Thea had been hopelessly in love with Roy and Alex had still been obsessed with finding Kara.  She hadn’t had time for any sort of romantic entanglement.

She never had.

Which is why this whole Linda thing was so bizarre.  She didn’t want to sleep with Linda.

Well, ok so she did, but she also just wanted to talk to her.  She wanted to find out why she thought redemption was so important, or even possible.  She wanted to listen to her rant about how Dottie had most certainly dropped the ball on purpose.  She wanted to find out her hobbies, and buy her pot stickers; wanted to hear her laugh and see that smug smirk when she thought she’d outsmarted someone.  She wanted it all, not just the sex; all of it. 

Except she couldn’t have it.  She’d promised Hank.

And even if she hadn’t… Kara was still missing, and she couldn’t start something as serious as a relationship with Linda would be without having made any progress on that front.  She’d promised Kara she wouldn’t abandon her.

She was tired of letting people down.

Maggie’s thumb caught the lone tear of frustration that trailed down her cheek.

“So,” the detective started, “tell me more about the Thermigarians.  Did you find anything interesting?”

Alex pulled her lips between her teeth, forcing her mind onto a topic she actually had control over.

“Yeah.  Apparently they go on spirit journeys or whatever.  I got a decidedly ‘backpacking through Europe’ kind of feel for it though.  So they go, but they don’t come back.  Yer-ref-pickle,” Alex tried, the name feeling odd in her mouth, “they’re the one I spoke to, they think someone’s kidnapping them.”

“But you think they’re being recruited?”  Maggie asked, standing and retrieving the pickles and Twinkies for Alex.

The agent took them gratefully, pooping the jar open with shaking hands and snatching the salty food out of its prison. 

“It makes sense.  We know that at almost all of the murders a Thermigarian was present, that they laid their victims in such a way that they honored their diety; that for the most part they took place around moon cycles.  Now from there we can say, ‘oh psycho killer who is super religious’, but with the new info…”

“You’re thinking the Thermigarian’s are just positioning them, being sympathetic?”

“Exactly.  If we look at it where the victims were forced to do something or say something; where their killers were looking for information?  It stands to reason that the Thermigarian was there for affect.  Like I said, they’re peaceful.  So once the actual injury occurred they would want to make the target as comfortable as possible.  For them, that is looking at Nokor, the moon spirit.”

“So, if they’re the intimidation, who’s the muscle?”  Kate pulled the now forgotten jar of pickles from Alex’s hands, setting it down on the coffee table in front of them.

Alex shrugged, allowing the movement.  “That’s the part we need to figure out.  I was going to go on a walk with Hank later on to figure out a good location for recruiting aliens.”

“Sounds solid.  Keep me in the loop.  Once we have a location we can do some serious recon and move this case along.  ALFA needs to die like yesterday.”

Alex snorted, setting her hot chocolate down on the coffee table as well and running her hands over her face.  Exhaustion coming on like whiplash as her emotions finally calmed the fuck down.

“I agree.  I’ll call him tomorrow.”

“Hmm,” Maggie pulled Alex’s legs onto her lap, forcing the agent to lay on Kate on the other end of the couch.  The detective worked at the zipper on Alex’s boot, her voice infused with innocence as she continued.  “While you’re with him, you might want to ask him for the last week in June next year.”

Kate giggled, easing Alex’s exhausted body onto the couch cushions as she stood to get blankets from the hall closet.  Alex’s eyes followed her, confused and wary as she tried to understand what was taking place.

“What should he do with that last week?”  She asked suspiciously, pulling her leg towards her when Maggie tugged on her shoe.

The detective rolled her eyes.  “Not him doofus.  You; we want you to take the week.”

“You know, these insults are not really terms of endearment.  And stop fussing over me, it’s creeping me out!”

Another eye roll as Maggie dumped her legs on the couch, standing and grabbing the mess Alex had made.  Kate’s hand on her shoulder stopped her from getting up to clean her own mess, and the red head proceeded to drape a comforter over Alex’s prone body.

“What Maggie is so eloquently trying to ask you, is if you would like to join us on our honeymoon? At least for the end of it.   And no,” She said as she slipped her palm over Alex’s mouth before she could interrupt.  “It’s not about us trying to baby you, or anything ridiculous like that; we are not into weird threesomes or swinging; yes, we trust you alone… did I miss anything babe?”

The red head threw Maggie a look full of mischief, removing her hand from Alex’s face, and the detective made heart eyes and swooned.  Alex wanted to gag… and hug her.

“Nope, that about covers it all.  We just want to be around friends Danvers.  People need people, and your mine or whatever.  Don’t make a big deal out of it.”

Alex bit back the smile threatening to explode on her lips, trying to appear aloof.  “I can see what I can do; I’ll talk to Hank tomorrow. …but no funny business Sawyer.”

“Oh for the love of—”  Maggie threw her hands up in the air, nearly dropping the articles in her hand and marched into the Kitchen, ignoring Alex’s chuckles as she left.

Kate shook her head in exasperation. 

 

~*~

 

Kara laid on the floor next to the cushy bed Cat had furnished her apartment with.  She was still in her  green baby doll bird dress that she’d worn to work that day, her cardigan having been discarded somewhere in the living room.  Her legs and arms were crossed a look of utter bewilderment on her face as she stared at her ceiling, her left hand bent at the elbow and touching the place where Alex’s lips had been.

Alex Danvers had kissed her.

Her.

Kara Zor-El.

She didn’t quite know what to make of that.  The pads of her fingers traced the faint remnants that she could still feel.  Alex’s scent still lingering in her nose even now. 

Alex Danvers had kissed her.

A twitch at her lips startled Kara enough that the developing smile quickly faded.  What in the world was happening to her?  She inhaled sharply and pushed herself into a sitting position; legs crossed and hands on her knees.  When Alex had kissed her—before Alex had kissed her, when she had still been leaning in and Kara had had ample time to pull away, the Agent had sent her heart racing.  A weird feeling of anticipation had coursed through her.  Her heart had thudded in her chest, and little shocks of energy had hit her fingertips.  In those seconds she had thought Alex would kiss her, like really kiss her.  The way she’d seen people kiss in the shows they’d watched together.  In those seconds, she had imagined it happening, had prepared herself for her response; had wanted to be able to give a response. 

And then Alex had kissed her cheek and Kara had felt equal parts devastated and relieved. 

But she didn’t know why.

Closing her eyes, she forced herself to isolate her thoughts.  As it was, they were much too jumbled to be of any use to her.

She needed to understand what she was feeling, a task that would be difficult considering the lobe of her brain that helped her to feel emotions had been shut off for the better part of 2 years.  And even before CADMUS had poked around in her cerebellum, she had had difficulty understanding her feelings.  It hadn’t been like that on Krypton.  On Krypton she had had guidance from her parents, her aunt Astra.  Kitai.  Even Lara.  Whenever she had been experiencing something especially difficult, she had always had people to turn to that would help her understand the why.

She had no such thing now, but she’d been on her own since landing on Earth.  She could figure it out.

She thought back to how this all began.  The first time she had seen Alex, the agent had been all scowls and misery.  She’d been in desperate need of sun and had been irritated by Kara’s mere existence.  To be fair, the first meeting they had, Kara had been unaware that Cat was being appointed a security detail and had forced Alex to wait in the receptionist area until Cat called for her.  Which hadn’t been for another 2 hours.  Cat hadn’t wanted a detail; Alex had been little more than a nuisance to her.  The two of them—Cat and Alex— had gotten into an impressive staring contest that was still spoken about in the whispers of CatCo’s halls to this day.

Needless to say, they had not gotten off on the right foot.  Alex had ignored her for roughly 2 more months, saying only a preliminary greeting when they passed each other.  Kara hadn’t taken offense, her job was to secure the life of the CEO, not make friends. 

Except that Alex had become her friend.  Winn had become her friend.  By some stroke of fate, the odd pair had invited Kara to dinner and had stuck by her since.  Something about her had made them want to keep talking to her.  She thought back to that first night, to Alex with her hand covering her face and an embarrassed smile.  Kara had liked the way she’d looked then; had enjoyed the pretty twinkle in Alex’s eyes when the light reflected off of them just so.  Had liked the mirth that crossed the woman’s face; the smile that Kara had put there.

She really liked her smile.

Every movie night they’d had in the past month had made Kara more and more eager to see it.  She’d thought up new ways to coax the expression out of Alex, who generally didn’t really seem like much of a smiler.  She smiled around Kara, and when she did it felt like…

Like watching the sun rise from her bedroom in Krypton; like a warm hug from her mother, arms tight and face pressed just so.

She liked it.  She didn’t know what it was, but she really liked the way Alex made her feel.

She knew what was happening would only be temporary.  Sooner or later she would stop the ALFA movement and Lillian would reassign her.  She’d be reset and sent back out as an assassin, never remembering Alex Danvers or her heart stopping smile.

She’d been through this before.  Had lived this story.  Mission, reset, mission.

She felt battle weary, a heavy weight on her soul.

She flexed her hands in front of her, watching the digits flex in the light from the moon and city lights.  There would be time for that later, when she was stuck back in her cell.  Right now she was as free as she could be and Alex Danvers had kissed her.

A smile came to her face.  She liked that Alex Danvers had kissed her.  She liked how it had felt.  This might be temporary but she was going to enjoy every temporary moment she was given.  She’d fill her mind with every joy possible, etch the feel of Alex’s hands into her brain, and dare them to take it away.

They’d tried to take away Krypton, but she remembered her mother’s eyes, her smell.  Had remembered her father liked to wear blue.  She might not have everything, but she had the important stuff.  When this was over, she’d find a way to get it all back.

~*~

 

“ _She called you pretty after you yelled at her_?”

“I know right!”  Alex maneuvered her character to the left, trying to blend in with the background on screen as she reloaded her blaster.  “Who even does that?  Also, I didn’t yell, I was just frustrated.”

Alex was in her apartment, clad in sweats and a tank top with a bowl of popcorn next to her.  Her Xbox was on, displaying the game Battlefront on her television.  Jon’s voice was echoing from the gaming headset that Winn had bought her last christmas.  It was the weekend and he had finished all of his assignments so his parents had said he could play with his friends.  Clark was just unaware that his “friend” was Alex.  Lois was too annoyed with the both of them-- Clark and Alex, not Jon-- to even care enough to interfere.  She cared more about her kid’s happiness  than the pissing war that Clark and Alex insisted on having.

Alex thought she was a good mom.

“ _You were mean_.”  Jon corrected.  “ _Also, that’s not correct language.  You wouldn’t let me talk like that_.”  Jon’s male Jedi hopped over a pod racer and revived a fallen teammate.

“It’s grammar, not language.  And cut me some slack, I’m just a little stressed at the moment.”  She took out two storm troopers in quick succession pulling their team to the lead.  “I’m a little out of my depth here Thumper, what am I even supposed to say to her?”

There was a brief pause in the conversation as Jon focused on taking out a sniper, letting out an adorable cheer when he got them.  “ _Do you like her_?”  He asked, and she could almost hear the exasperation in his voice.

“Well that’s a personal question.”  She reached into her popcorn bowl to her right, popping a few kernels in her mouth as she took out an enemy that charged at her.  “You’re like 5, what do you know about liking people?”

“ _I’m 9_.” Jon’s voice was flat, and Alex could imagine the eye roll she would be receiving if he were with her.  “ _Almost 10 actually.  And I almost had a girlfriend like 3 months ago, but then she moved away.  And no, you cannot ask me about it.  No avoiding.  Do you like the pretty blonde_?”

Alex smirked, barely paying attention to the game anymore, affection swelling in her chest.  “Who said she was pretty?  Or blonde for that matter?”

_“You have a type.  At this point I’m more surprised that she’s human than anything else.”_

Alex made a noncommittal noise, cursing softly as she stepped on a frag mine.  She honestly wasn’t all that sure that Linda was human.  The woman was a walking ad for ‘one of these things is not like the other’.

“ _Alex_!”  Jon’s impatient voice came over her headset, and she scowled at his tone and her own demise.  She’d almost had a perfect streak!  “ _Do you like her_?”

Alex huffed out a breath of frustration and sunk back into her couch as their game stats popped on the screen, declaring their team victorious.

“Yeah?  I mean… She’s ridiculously nice so I can’t really trust her, but… I don’t know.  I like being around her.  I feel relaxed when I’m around her.  That’s a good thing, right?”

“ _That’s a great thing!  You’re never relaxed.  I heard Aunt Lucy say you need to get laid.  I didn’t know what that meant so I asked Damien, and boy!  You adults are really weird!  But if it hel-_ -”

“Whoa whoa whoa!” She interrupted, leaning forward and dropping the controller on her table.  “What did Damien say it meant?” 

Damien Wayne was the son of Bruce Wayne and Talia Al-Ghul, Jon’s best friend, and oh yeah—a fucking former assassin.  At least she hoped it was former, Bruce had _told_ her it was former.  Jon learning anything from him usually set her on edge, but this? 

_“The sex Alex.  Honestly I’m not a baby anymore.”_

“Uh huh” She said, scrubbing a hand over her face.  Totally not the way she thought this conversation would go. “And what exactly is ‘the sex’?”

Jon groaned, his annoyance clearly reaching new levels.  “ _You know what it is Alex!  It’s when a guy puts a baby in a girl.  Damien got really red when he told me, I don’t know why.  He said the man gives the lady something that turns into an egg.  He said we’ll be able to give it when we’re adults, but he made it sound really painful, so I don’t wanna do it_.”

“Mmhm.”  Alex said noncommittedly as she typed a quick text to Lois.  She was so not touching this one.  “Sounds legit Thumper.  Also, your Aunt Lucy is a jerk, don’t listen to her.  At least not about this.”

“ _I just think it’s a good thing that you found someone who you don’t have to try hard with.  It’s good that you can relax.  Mom says when you relax, that lets you be yourself more and people should like you for who you are.  Not what you can do for them_.”

“I think you’re the only person in the world who thinks I try hard Jon.  Everyone seems to be of the opinion that I don’t try at all.”

“ _You shouldn’t listen to them_.”  He replied ardently and Alex heaved a breath of exasperation.  “ _No.  Seriously.  I’m your best friend, not them.  I know you better than anyone, you say it all the time!  And since I know you best, I know that you’re always trying.  You want everyone safe, even if you don’t like them.  That’s why you have a dangerous job.  It’s not cause you like shooting people, it’s because you want to keep people safe.  You don’t have to do any of the things you do, Dad said you could have been a doctor.  Even that is you helping people.  All you want to do is help people.  It’s just no one sees that because your mean to everyone besides me.  If your nice to Linda, or you at least try to be nice, that means you really like her.  And you never really like anyone, not really.  So, you shouldn’t let an opportunity like this pass_.”

Alex sat gob smacked in her living room, staring at the title screen for Battlefront and feeling thoroughly one-upped by a nine-year-old. But than a large belch sounded in her ear and she was brought back to reality.  Because Jon may be her favorite person in existence, but he was still a kid.

“Alright love guru, how about another game?” She asked, her controller already clicking through the menu to find them a new team.

“ _Are you going to ask her out_?”  Jon insisted.

“In case you haven’t noticed Thumper, I don’t really do attachments.”

“ _But that’s just it_!” Jon argued, his voice insistent.  “ _You don’t do attachments and you’re not happy!  Bad guys don’t have any friends and they’re bad.  You need friends so that you stay good_!”

Alex snorted, “Oh yeah?  The Brain was evil, and he had Pinky.  Voldemort was evil, and he had Nagini.  Scar was evil, and he had the hyenas!  Boom!”  She was not ashamed that she mimed a mike drop.  A fact that Jon was probably aware of if the long-suffering sigh he released was any indication.

“ _That’s the point Alex!  All those people couldn’t trust their friends!  Except maybe the Brain, but that doesn’t count because Pinky couldn’t trust **him**.  I don’t want you to be evil.  You’re a hero!  A better one than even dad because you don’t have any powers-_ -”

“ _Jon--”_

 _“That means you don’t have to go out there and save people, but you do it anyway because it’s the right thing to do.  That’s way better!  You’re not a bad guy_ —”

“Jon—”

“ _You may hate yourself, but I don’t_!”  His voice was shaky now and it sent a lance of pain through Alex’s chest.  “ _You’re my best friend, you’re a good guy_.”

“Jon,” she started, swallowing past the lump in her throat.  “People are… they’re complicated.  I don’t… I’m not good with trusting them.  The only person who’s never let me down is you.  You’re my best friend too Thumper, but I don’t know how to be the person you want me to be.”  Jon’s sniffles quieted but they still hurt her chest.  “I’ll try to be better Jon; I promise I’ll be better…  Hey,” She pressed when he didn’t answer.  “I’m not turning my back on you ok?  Rebel alliance for life, right?”

“ _Rebel alliance for life_.”

 

~*~

 

_April 2012_

_Alex awoke slowly, the rough sheets beneath her body alerting her to the fact that she was not at her own apartment.  She groaned internally, her tongue swiping the sleep from her mouth as she groggily opened her eyes._

_Her phones lit screen stared back at her from an end table and Alex clumsily pulled the phone over to her.  A text message from Felicity stared back at her telling her to call her had her muffling her next groan into the pillow._

_At least the apartment’s owner had blinds, Alex could just barely see the sun peeking in through the slits.  A tired hand swiped over her face and a quick glance at the other side of the bed confirmed she was alone._

_Time to make her escape._

_She easily located and pulled on her clothes from the night before, halting only when she could not find her shirt.  Cursing softly, she slipped her phone into her back pocket and grabbed her jacket from the armchair in the corner before quietly leaving the room._

_She was promptly greeted with a very naked, very hairy ass.  The man it was attached too was passed out on the couch; also naked.  Nausea swamped over her and she wondered exactly how much she had had to drink last night._

_She was just contemplating stripping a layer of her skin off with bleach when cool hands slid around her abdomen from behind.  A sigh of relief escaped her when she saw the painted nails, a small kiss pressing into the base of her neck.  Her latest lover seemed intent on repeating their activities from the night before, something that Alex normally would have been ok with.  But Felicity messaging her usually meant something had come up… like a lead on Kara._

_Turning in the dark arms banded around her waist, Alex pulled the woman’s (pretty woman’s) face up to her own, pressing a hungry kiss there.  Her fingers slid over the woman’s cheeks and into the softest pillow of curls Alex had ever known.  The woman hummed her appreciation at the impromptu head massage and Alex pressed a final kiss to her lips._

_“I’m so sorry baby, I have to go to work.”_

_The woman whined and surged forward, forcing Alex against her front door and sucking at her neck.  The wave of arousal that came with the aggressive move was quickly snuffed out by the still naked man on the sofa.  Maneuvering quickly, Alex ducked from between the woman’s arms, her neck coming loose with a soft squelching noise._

_“I’ll call you!”  She yelled out behind her retreating figure, pulling her jacket on over her bra clad chest and ducking out of the door._

_The fact that she hadn’t caught the woman’s name or number didn’t faze her one bit._

_Felicity had been excited when Alex had finally reached her; the nerds voice coming through easily on her headset as she drove her motorcycle through Gotham’s streets.  Apparently, there had been multiple reports of a flying woman in National City.  Alex had immediately packed her stuff and booked the next flight._

_A few hours later and she was in the sunny city checking into a seedy motel.  Felicity’s instructions ringing in her head._

_In the end it took her nearly 2 weeks of stakeouts, questions and her amazing intellect to set a trap for her quarry.  She’d known it wasn’t Kara when she’d recognized the bodies that the perp had left behind them.  Although to be fair, the people that this guy was sending to the hospital were all pretty evil in Alex’s book._

_She lay in wait in the shadows of a home depot parking lot; an unknown child molesters work place.  She’d already texted Maggie the details and she’d in turn called in a favor from a contact in the NCPD.  They had a full squadron at the man’s home awaiting him for arrest. Unfortunately for him, she still needed him as bait._

_And what great bait he was.  The man wriggled like a worm on a hook and it did him just as much good.  The shot from Alex’s taser was batted away like a nuisance, the annoyed woman glaring at her with grey-brown eyes from behind her prey.  Alex didn’t back down, using every weapon in her arsenal, pulling out her bow staff and swinging it in a wide arc at her adversary’s head.  The wood splintering on the woman’s arm, and still Alex continued until she was within striking distance and she released a punch to the woman’s side._

_Her hand felt like it literally shattered._

_Her cry of pain was interrupted by the obviously alien woman dropping the man and lifting Alex by the collar._

_“What are you doing human?  Why do you protect this filth?”  Alex gasped at the sound of the woman’s voice, and the woman’s scowl deepened; eyes taking on an eerie glow.  “You will answer me, or I will end you.”_

_The shock bracelets that Felicity had sent her sent enough electricity into the woman’s arms to prompt her release.  When they’d initially designed the weapons, Alex had simply wanted something for an emergency escape.  Kal had still been trying to get in her good graces and had let her read some Kryptonian texts from his fortress.  Felicity had been in nerd heaven; Alex had too, but she’d been way cooler about it._

_They’d never been able to make it quite powerful enough to cause Kal any real pain, but they had at least been able to shock him.  It had been enough for Alex to get some distance.  Not that it did her much good against a Kryptonian, but they’d had some more stuff in the works._

_Things that Alex was wishing she’d brought with her as the woman pulled her shoulders back and shot heat vision from her eyes.  Alex barely managed to roll out of the way, and immediately found herself back in the Kryptonian’s grasp.  The woman raised her to eye level, Alex’s legs dangling uselessly and far enough away to be unable to do any real damage._

_“You will answer me.”  The woman repeated, voice a snarl and eyes still glowing._

_Alex gasped as the fabric of her jacket cut into her neck.  “You were going to kill him!” she choked out._

_The woman frowned, eyes losing their glow.  “What does that matter to you?  He is unworthy of his life.  Rao would bless my justice!”_

_So definitely Kryptonian then.  “Just because he’s a criminal doesn’t mean you should kill him.  We shouldn’t get to decide that.  We’re not gods.”  She scrabbled at the fingers on her front, trying to ease the tension on her throat.  “Not even you.”  She finished in Kryptonian, finally causing the woman to ease her grip and set her down._

_Brown eyes stared at her in confused wonderment even as the woman carelessly flicked her wrist at the suspects fleeing form causing him to fall.  “Who are you?  Why are you here?”_

_Alex rolled her shoulders, tugging at her clothes to further alleviate the stinging pain in her body.  “My name is Alex Danvers.  I was looking for someone, someone like you.”_

_A blur of movement and the woman was nearly nose to nose with her, staring her down with bared teeth.  “Who?  What is their name?”_

_Alex shook her head.  Kal had told her about Fort Rozz, how there might still be Kryptonians out there who hated him and his family; how they might have been the ones to take Kara.  She wasn’t going to take chances with this woman, no matter how powerful she might be._

_Another frown marred the woman’s features and she pulled back slightly.  Crossing her arms over her chest.  “You are brave child; if not incredibly foolish.  I would offer you a boon: I will tell you who I am searching for and why, and you will tell me who you are searching for and why.”_

_She eyed the woman, considering.  “I need your name first.”_

_A high brow arched primly before Alex watched the same pose that Kara had taken performed in front of her._

_“My name is General Astra In-Ze, Scion to the House of Ze, warrior of Krypton and I am searching for my niece, Kara Zor-El.  Heir to the Great House of El.”_

~*~

 

“Have I told you how much I seriously love your laptop?  Like seriously you need to introduce me to your friend!  You’re not even a nerd, why would someone trust you with this beauty?”

Winn’s exclamation was punctuated by him caressing the keys on her keyboard, making cooing sounds to the machinery in front of him so he completely missed the offended look Kara sent him.  She’d actually built the computer herself, and had been quite annoyed at the limitations enforced upon her by the current human standards.  They didn’t even have holograms yet!  Of course, she couldn’t tell Winn that, it would have blown her cover as ‘passably intelligent but kind’ Linda Taylor.  He was under the impression that an old friend who travelled around the world on humanitarian missions had been given the device as a thank you and had given it to Kara since she would not be able to use it in the third world.

“Katu travels a lot, I told you.  On the very slim chance she is ever around I’ll keep you away from her just out of spite.”  She threw a napkin at his head, smirking when it caught him in the eye and he flinched away.

“Hey!  I’m helping you get your girl remember!  Your badass agent who you can’t stop making heart eyes at?”

“I do not make heart eyes!”

“Oh yeah!  Is that why you keep rubbing your cheek and staring off into the distance?”  Winn teased, smiling knowingly when her blush reached epic proportions.  “You’re like a first grader all excited after their first date!”

“It wasn’t a date!”  Kara mumbled, tugging on her fingers and trying to hide behind her long blonde hair.  She wasn’t quite sure what else to say.  She’d never been in this situation before, with someone talking to her about this kind of stuff.  Heck, she’d never even liked someone before; not that she could remember anyway.  Her hand reached up and rubbed behind her left ear, then again, Winn was helping… “Do you think she thinks it was a date?” 

Her nervousness was punctuated by her fluttering hand movements, but she couldn’t help it.  It was another thing she wasn’t used to, having emotions.  Usually they just turned them off, but they’d needed her to be expressive on this op; had wanted to test how well she could handle herself.

Winn’s expression turned sympathetic as he shook his head.  “Probably not.  Alex is even more obtuse about this stuff than you are.  Also, I don’t know exactly how her flirtation works, but I doubt she would have picked a fight with you if she thought it was a date.”

“Oh.”  Kara’s shoulders slumped, a heavy feeling settling in her chest.  So much for her ‘enjoy the experience’ plan.  Alex wasn’t even interested.

“Hey now!  No frowny faces!  We’ve just started, besides it’s not all about Alex.  It’s about you too, you saw the Alex that everyone else sees last night.  The jackass.  You need to decide if that side is something you can live with.”  Winn turned his attention back to her computer where he was apparently installing a ‘ROM’ for a ‘Nintendo 64’.  He’d said she’d needed to experience Ocarina of Time the way it was born.  She’d just nodded.

“I don’t think she was a … that.  She was upset but given the context of the conversation I think she had every right to be.  If no one’s shown her another way than obviously seeing another way will be a shock to the system. And I’m not saying I’m right either, there’s every possibility that I am wrong, but the fact that she listened is what matters.  Besides Alex is always nice to me.”

Winn whistled long and low.  “Dude you’ve got it bad.  Alex isn’t ‘nice’ to anyone.  She threatens people all the time--”

“That’s only when they’ve done something to her.”

“She glares at anyone who talks to her--”

“She takes her job seriously and thinks talking is a distraction.”

“And she hogs the twizzlers!”  Winn finished, blatantly ignoring Kara as he pushed away from her computer.  The 4k screens now looking useless as the pixelated cartoon tried and failed to fill the monitors.

“Alex is nice!”  Kara insisted.  “She gives me a chocolate bar every lunch period; the good kind she said, not the plastic from America.  She said it will help me avoid the afternoon crash.  And she always helps me carry papers if she thinks its too much.  And she never lets Ms. Grant pick on me in front of her.  And she always reminds me to take my lunch if I get too distracted.  And,” Kara continued, taking time to inhale.  “She’s always making sure I’m ok, her attention is always on Cat but sometimes I’ll feel her watching me to; like she’s checking on me.  And just because she doesn’t do that for everyone doesn’t mea… oh.”

Kara blinked owlishly at Winn’s smug grin.

“Oh.” He parroted as Kara sank into her couch. 

Well this was good news.

Right…

“But she was angry with me.”

“And yet here you stand, unscathed… with a trademarked Alex Danvers half-assed apology.  You should feel blessed.”

Kara offered him a wry grin and an eye roll, pulling a throw pillow into her lap.  “I didn’t mean to upset her, I just… she is very stubborn.  People—aliens included—I believe they should be judged based on their current character.  Not on who they were or where they come from, but rather who they are trying to be.  It should mean something if someone is trying to do better; we should help them do better.”

“I agree,” Winn started sympathetically.  “It’s just that with Alex there’s a story.  One I can’t really tell but… just cut her some slack.  She’s honestly not trying to be a jerk, she’s just been through a lot.  She’s lost a lot, so trusting anyone, even someone with good intentions, that’s like physical torture to her.  It means something that she’s trying with you.”

“I’ve… never really felt like this before.”  She drawled, stretching the words out and clutching the pillow to her chest.  “I don’t know what to do.”

Winn smirked.  “Pretty sure you’re doin it right if Alex Danvers is stuttering all over the place.”

The pillow to face was well earned.

“Why do you know so much about this stuff anyway?  Statistically speaking Alex should be the love guru, not the tech nerd.”  She smiled to show she was teasing and Winn reciprocated with a puff of his chest.

“I am multitalented.”  He preened, setting up a controller and passing it over to her.  “Also, not a lot of guys liked me.  I had a very small core group of friends, and most of them were girls.  I gotta tell you, best way to get a girl?  Be friends with a girl.  They’ll tell you exactly what you should and shouldn’t do.  I mean some of it is just normal common sense, but there are little confusing things that can trip anyone up.”

“Like what?”  She asked, pulling a stool over from her kitchen counter and sitting next to Winn at her computer desk.

“Like are you supposed to kiss her on the first date?  There are signs a girl shows that lets you know whether that’s ok or not.  And, if you still aren’t sure, it’s usually better to ask than to just go for it.  It’s better to be seen as overly precautious or obtuse than as a sexual predator or jackass.  Ready to try this?”  The question was obviously redundant as Winn simply launched into a quick explanation of the controls before setting her loose in Hyrule.

“And these girls, did you date any of them?”  Her character, Link, was blocked by an annoying red headed elf man.  If this had been reality, Kara would have taken great pleasure in launching the annoying elf child into the sun.  “Is it true what they say that the best relationships come from friendships?”

Winn snorted, sipping on a can of coke and watching her progress.  “Hardly.  Ever hear of the ‘friend zone’?  Yeah, I was pretty securely in the ‘do not date’ folder for all of them.  BUT, they did help me understand girls more so there was that.”

She pressed the pause button, Link stopping mid stride and turned her full attention to Winn beside her who raised his eyebrow in question.

“Wait,” She licked her lips, shifting her weight as she thought of how to word her question.  “You’re telling me that you were friends with these women and all you got from it was learning about female mating habits?”

“What?  No!”  Winn sat up in the computer chair, shaking his head and scoffing in succession.  “Are you kidding?  First Linda, it’s not about what you ‘get’ from a friendship; good friends don’t need anything in return.  You just need to be there.  They didn’t owe me anything; I don’t get access to their bodies because I’m nice.  And B, they were awesome friends; we studied together all the time.  I helped them pass their classes and they… taught me how to dress.”

The brunette was glaring into his coke now and Kara felt her heart twinge.  These damn feelings were getting very annoying.  But she also wanted to learn all she could about them.  This one, what she was feeling for Winn right now?  This felt important.

“So,” She began, unpausing the game and carefully splitting her attention between the screen and Winn.  “Ms. Grant got invited to something called ‘Heroes and Villains’, she told me to dump the invite.  Apparently, it’s very hipster, and has nothing to do with Catco’s vision.”  Winn was practically vibrating in his chair right now and Kara almost felt bad for her falsehood.  Almost.  “Anyway, I was thinking what a waste it was, I mean Cat has a twelve-year-old son who I’m sure would have loved to go.  So, I saved them hoping she’d change her mind, but she booked another event that weekend.  And that’s what I learned about girls from girls; they can be incredibly wasteful.”  She concluded, pleased with herself when Winn looked like he was practically salivating.

“Kara?”  He started, voice hoarse and sounding as if on the verge of tears.

“Hmmm?”

“Do you happen to still have those tickets?”

She frowned, rolling past a carnivorous plant and sneaking a quick glance at her friend.  “Yes, why?  Did you want to go?”

Winn’s squeal was worth the earache.

 

~*~ 

 

Brock Gilman was a tall man, standing at well over 6 feet and packed solidly with muscle.  He had blonde hair and blue eyes; a ‘heart throb’. 

At least that’s what the tech who had given Kara the hit had said. 

She fingered the slight swell behind her ear.  This was becoming harder and harder; she’d need another dose soon.

Dressed in all black spec-ops gear, she pulled her cowl up as she continued to watch the man below her.  No hair blew in her face, cinched as it was behind her head.  She didn’t need the distraction.

Brock finished loading the trunk of his SUV, moving around to the front of the vehicle and getting in.  Kara stayed silent, perched on the roof of a street lamp as she took in his movements.

When he pulled the car out of the parking lot, she took to the air; trailing slightly to the right and far behind him. 

Brock Gilman was not a creature of habit and it had taken her slightly longer to plan this particular incident.  The man liked to change his routes and plans at the drop of a hat; paranoia at its finest.  Kara would have respected him for that if it hadn’t been driven by such blatant fear.

Even from up here she could smell the near constant perspiration that oozed from the man’s skin.  Humans could be so disgusting.

He took a left on Kennedy, turning onto the parkway and accelerating the vehicle way past the speed limit.  Kara sneered when he almost plowed into a slower vehicle on his right, the elderly woman inside nearly panicking and driving into a ditch.  Kara dove quickly, barely touching the car but righting its course and allowing the woman to continue on her way home.

Brock hadn’t even taken notice.

It wasn’t for another 5 miles that her design was put into play.  Brock was going an easy thirty miles over the speed limit, and had to brake harshly when he chanced upon a deer on the road.  His car spun but miraculously he found that he didn’t hit anything; deer included.  Breathing heavily, he exited the vehicle, checking to make sure everything was ok on the exterior as well.  Seeing that everything was still in working order, the man turned back to his driver side door and happened upon the devil.

Kara’s eyes were glowing, her hands loose at her side as she stared the man down. 

His fear caused his heart to accelerate and she wondered idly how much fear she’d need to instill in him to make his heart explode.

His hand reached for his gun at the same time hers shot out to grab his jacket.  Her arm flicked up, barely moving as she released her grip on him.  The man was launched into the sky, enough force behind her throw that he kept going.

Up.

Up.

And away.

The stench of feces reached her nose at five thousand feet, followed closely by urine.

He stopped screaming at fifteen thousand feet.

At thirty thousand feet, when his heart exploded, she thought languidly, Ah.  That’s how much.

As Brock continued his ascent—she’d made sure to toss him high enough that he would not be coming back down—she found herself staring at her hands in displeasure.  This was not what she was made for.  Frustration filled her and she scowled as her comms came to life.  She responded to the prompts robotically, explaining the situation like she’d been a third party observer.  CADMUS didn’t like bodies, Kara had made sure one would never be found.  It’s why they kept her around.  She clenched her fists, glaring in hatred at the still ascending body.  This was not what she was made for.

Soon this would be over.

Soon she would join her family in Rao’s light.

Soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wowzers! Alex is really draggin her feet here, I mean come on lady. Where's Sebastian when you need him?
> 
> Ok. SO Astra. My general, my heart. She will be back. This is not the last we have heard of her. I've had her backstory sitting on my hard drive since last August. It's ... I just really can't wait for you guys to read it. 
> 
> And Winn. My poor baby Winn. He just seems like the kind of guy who was taken advantage of, not saying that friend-zoning is a thing (its not), BUT there are still some sneakedy snooks. No worries, Kara will share her ginormous heart with him. I think he's just the most grandest guy ever.
> 
> What's you guys think of Alex's past? I know I didn't share a whole lot (that's coming), but it was a nice glimpse yeah?
> 
> Also, Brock and the other ppl Kara's killing... they're not random. #justsayin
> 
> Well, anyway I hope you guys enjoyed that chapter, it's pretty much all a shit show from here on out. Tempers flare, things are said, old frenemies emerge... See you next time on Dragon Ball Z.
> 
> ~Chronicles


	8. Maybe Redemption Has Stories to Tell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What we know so far:  
> When Kara landed on Earth, the Danvers took her in for a short time. Unfortunately she went missing and Alex has dedicated her life to finding her.
> 
> After one too many ops gone bad, Hank puts Alex on babysitting duty for one Cat Grant.
> 
> Cat has been targeted by an Alien terrorist group who has seemingly taken issue with an article she wrote on immigration. Linda Taylor, Cat's assistant, in trying to woo Alex, also helps her by taking her to an Alien camp.
> 
> Unbeknownst to everyone, Linda is also Kara. Just about 10 years later and post torture by CADMUS. She has been placed with Cat for similar reasons. More to come.
> 
> With both Alex and Kara agonizing over their mutual affections, the alien camp turns out to be kind of datish. And the last chapter saw them coming to terms with how they were feeling awwww.
> 
> Maggie, Kate, Jon, and Winn were necessary in the resolution and a cheek kiss felt like more.
> 
> As for ALFA, we don't know too much about them right now, but Alex did discover that they seem to be recruiting Thermigarians from the youth at the Alien camp. It's all downhill from here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, This chapter begins our ascent into what storytellers like to call the "Main Event", so yeah. Long time coming. This is probably the last "slow" chapter we'll see in a while. Also chapter lengths are starting to go up through no attempt of my own. It just happened. Man writing a series vs one long book is starting to make a lot more sense.
> 
> This chapter is currently unbeta'd. All mistakes are my own and I apologize.
> 
> Song: Dare You to Move- Switchfoot

** Maybe Redemption Has Stories to Tell **

Cat’s first appointment for the day was an interesting woman.  Interesting because she was slightly annoying.  Slightly annoying because she wouldn’t stop _staring._

Kara knew Alex had noticed too, she had the same look she had on her face whenever Steve from accounting visited Kara’s desk.  Winn had said that the look meant Alex was jealous.  Kara selfishly and irrationally enjoyed the look.  Hence why Lena Luthor was still alive.

Well that and her evil mother would literally kill Kara if she even shook her daughter’s hand.  Mentally rolling her eyes, Kara tugged her ear and glanced over to the woman waiting to meet with Cat.  She was of adequate height, slightly shorter than Kara, with glowing pale skin and jet-black hair.  The blood red lips that completed the woman’s look made Kara think of Snow White and the Huntsman (Alex had _not_ been pleased with the live action version and had made Kara watch both movies) if, you know, Snow White casually wore Louis Vuitton’s and Vera Wang.

The woman was indeed dressed to the nine’s and she would not stop _staring_ at Kara.  Her eyes were calculating and it reminded the blonde vividly of her times in the debrief chamber.  Lillian would be proud.

Forcing her shaking hands into her lap, Kara glanced at Alex.  The agent was standing stoically in her normal spot between Kara’s desk and Cat’s private elevator.  Her normal black leather jacket was on over a standard white button up tucked into black slacks.  Black boots completed her ensemble and sent a slight thrill through Kara.  She always enjoyed looking at Alex, no matter what she was wearing, but the boots she currently had on had a slight heel that helped accentuate her backside.  Kara hadn’t even realized she liked butts until she’d seen Alex’s.  Then again, she was finding that she liked everything about Alex.  Especially when she worked her jaw and Kara got to see that one muscle jump and twitch.  Like now.

Alex pushed herself off the wall, striding quickly and purposefully into Cat’s office.  Kara let out a small ‘eep’, standing quickly and moving around her desk but not moving to follow.

Alex and Cat tended to have pretty intense standoffs and Kara had learned to simply stay out of the line of fire.

She watched avidly as Alex exchanged words with Ms. Grant, the CEO barely glancing up from her papers but rolling her eyes all the same as she continued to go through the paperwork on her desk. 

“My bodyguards would never _dare_ do something like that.”  Kara frowned at the tone of Lena’s voice, barely tensing as the CEO of L-Corp came to stand next to her.  “They’re all much too afraid of me.  And, since I know Catherine Grant is way more intense than I am, I must assume that this particular bodyguard is exceptionally… ballsy.”

A startled laugh escaped Kara’s lips at the choice of words and she quickly brought her hands up to her mouth to cover it.  That was getting out of hand.  Lillian would not be pleased.  Lena’s answering smile made Kara’s throat itch.

Coughing to cover up her faux paus, Kara glanced at Lena out of the side of her eye.  “Alex is… unique, yes, but she cares.  It’s better to care about things then not care at all.  Whatever she needs to talk to Ms. Grant about is clearly important.”

“Ah, clearly.”  Lena replied, her tone bordering on mocking, but she turned her attention away from the situation in Cat’s office to refocus on Kara.   The brunette squinted slightly as she stared up at the blonde, lips pursed in thought.  “May I ask you a question Ms. Taylor?”

Kara frowned, shifting her shoulders so that she was turned more towards the brunette but still had her eyes on the heated exchange in Ms. Grant’s office.  “Of course, Ms. Luthor.”

“I’m sorry it’s just— do you happen to wear color contacts?”  At the quick flaming of Kara’s cheeks, she hastened her speech.  “I only ask because there’s just the barest hint of blue in your right eye and I know I wouldn’t want to walk around unaware.  I didn’t mean to overstep any boundaries, I assure you.”

Kara felt her back tense, shoulders squaring against her will.   She saw Lena frown from out of the corner of her eye, momentarily ignoring her and pressing against her eyelid with her finger. Feeling a slight shift, she blinked rapidly until her display told her the contact was back in place.  She tried breathing through the quickened heart rate and chest pain, but still found herself unable to answer Lena coherently.

“No, you’re absolutely r…r-right.  I appr…appreciate the warning!  Thank you Ms. Luthor.”

“Linda?”  Cat’s voice pulled her attention and she blinked back into reality, realizing that both her boss and Alex were looking at her; Alex with clear concern.  “Thank you for entertaining Ms. Luthor while I finished with those contracts.  Please scan these into the system and send them off to the proper departments.  Ms. Luthor if you would follow me?”  Kara was given a stack of documents, Cat’s less than menacing voice doing little to calm her heart.

“It was a pleasure meeting you Ms. Taylor.  My apologies for making you uncomfortable.”

“You too, Ms. Luthor.  And no wor… worr—it’s fine.  Thank you.”  She still felt stiff and was afraid that the woman would take offense, but Lena simply smiled at her before following Cat back into her office.

The second the CEO’s were out of earshot, Alex’s hand was on her arm and pulling her attention.

“What did she say to you?  Are you okay?”

Kara nodded, forcing her head to work on the hinge in her neck.  “I’m fine.  I promise.  S…She didn’t say anything bad, just that I had s…s—something on my face.”  Still blushing, the blonde moved back towards her desk.  Most of the documents in her hand were for the Holiday party that Ms. Grant was throwing.  Last minute contracts and POs that needed signatures.  As she scanned the papers she felt herself calm, Alex hadn’t said anything, and she was the most observant person in the office.  If she hadn’t noticed than it was ok right?

 

* * *

Alex did _not_ like Lena Luthor.

Last name aside, the woman was proving to be a nuisance of the highest order.  Something about the woman just set her on edge.  And no, it was not because she was obviously crushing on Linda.  Alex wasn’t so barbaric that she had staked some sort of claim.

_Linda mine, go away._

Her scowl intensified with Lena’s curiosity, feeling heat creep under her skin in agitation.  She clenched her fists, holding them stiffly behind her back until she couldn’t stand it anymore and marched into Cat’s office.

The CEO was less than impressed with her entrance, barely glancing up from the contracts she was signing as Alex asked her very nicely to not leave her guest waiting.

“I wasn’t aware you were on my staff to be making such demands Agent Scully.” Cat still didn’t spare her a glance instead sipping from her glass of water.

“I’m not.”  Alex replied through gritted teeth, fighting the urge to cross her arms… or strangle the woman.  “I just don’t believe your employees should suffer for your lack of professionalism.”

Cat rolled her eyes.  “Is that why that stick is up your ass?  For heaven’s sake, just ask her out already and be done with it.  I enjoy a good romance story as much as the next woman, but _you_ Agent are doing it all wrong.  You want to talk about professionalism; you’re supposed to _pursue_ the girl, not _confuse_ her.  You’re behaving like Taylor Swift after her first breakup song.  Hint: hopeless pining is only cute when you’re young.”

Alex’s jaw dropped, gaping at the CEO like a fish and flushing red.  “I… she… that’s not—”

“Oh, spare me the details Scully, they’re probably very boring anyway.  But, word to the wise: that girl out there is a damn unicorn and if you’re really so concerned about Lena Luthor’s interest than that means you know that.  The question is: why haven’t you done anything about it?”

And then she was standing, moving around Alex’s flabbergasted form easily and towards the glass doors of her office.  Alex followed behind her, dazed and completely off balance, almost missing the conversation taking place in front of her.

But then she saw how tense Linda was, how her shoulders were squared, back straight.  Like a soldier, but not.  Soldiers stood at attention out of respect, not fear.

The words were what filtered in next, Linda’s halted speech as she struggled to force the words out of her mouth; eyes blinking rapidly at certain sounds that made her tongue immobile. 

Concern swept through her and her steps quickened, sharing a glance with Cat when the woman expertly maneuvered Lena away from her assistant and into her office.  Bitch she may be, but Alex found herself a little in love with Cat at the moment.

She approached Linda slowly; the other woman still tense and looking like the slightest movement would spook her.

“Linda? I’m gonna touch you ok?”  The blonde showed no response, eyes staring blankly into Cat’s office, bottom lip tucked between her teeth.  Alex carefully placed her hand on Linda’s arm, her touch light and as nonthreatening as she could make it.  “What did she say to you?  Are you okay?”

Brown eyes blinked slowly at her, before more words came from her friend; Alex noticing that the stutter hadn’t quite left her.  Before she had a chance to respond, Linda was already moving back around to her desk, and Alex knew the subject was closed.

Her chest felt heavy, but there was little she could do so she moved back into position, eyes flickering between Cat’s desk and Linda’s. 

She should just leave it alone.

One, they were both working; talking about something that was so obviously personal in this space was a horrible idea.  Even Alex knew that.  Two, she didn’t even know what she would say.

She’d never really had to do this before.  Well, at least not for anyone who wasn’t Jon.

She’d never had to try to make someone feel better.  Mostly she made sarcastic comments or jokes to add some levity to the air and then gave a super lame ‘things could be worse’ speech.  She wasn’t really one to delve into personal issues.

But now… Now she wanted very badly to make Linda feel better.  She hated seeing the stiffness in the woman’s spine, hated seeing her tug on her fingers.  She longed for the bright too sunny smiles, and the ridiculous optimism.  It was clear now to Alex, that somewhere down the line, Linda had been hurt very badly.  That she still chose to give everyone a fair shot was a remarkable feat; she was, as Cat had said, a damn unicorn.

Her phone was in her hand before she’d properly processed her next actions.

 

|Alex: If you were sad what would your friends do to make you feel better? _Sent_ _11:17 a.m._

|Thumper: Depends. _Sent_ _11:19 a.m._

|Thumper: Angry sad means to leave me alone.  _Sent_ _11:19 a.m._

|Thumper: Sad sad means to get me donuts. *smiley face*  _Sent_ _11:19 a.m._

|Thumper: sometimes I just want a hug…  _Sent_ _11:20 a.m._

|Alex: You’re the best damn Jedi in all the galaxy kid.  _Sent_ _11:21 a.m._

|Thumper: *smiley face* playoffs are starting soon, don’t forget! _Sent_ _11:21 a.m._

|Alex: Wouldn’t miss it for the world. _Sent_ _11:21 a.m._

|Alex: Also, why are you responding so quickly 0.o.  _Sent_ _11:22 a.m._

|Alex: You’re supposed to be in class -_ -.  _Sent_ _11:22 a.m._

|Thumper:  Mom let me stay home because my stomach was hurting.  _Sent_ _11:25 a.m._

|Alex: That’s because you eat like a baby hyena.  Are you feeling better now?  _Sent_ _11:26 a.m._

|Thumper: A little.  Mom’s making me eat soup only for a few days.  She said I need to get the poop out.  _Sent_ _11:27 a.m._

|Alex: Gross.  Thank you so much for that visual.  _Sent_ _11:28 a.m._

|Thumper:  You’re welcome!  _Sent_ _11:29 a.m._

 

Alex frowned down at her phone, but eventually shook off her worry.  As much of an asshole as Clark was, Lois would have text her if there was something seriously wrong with Jon.  Besides, kids got sick; that didn’t mean they were going to get worse, or die, or disappear…

Right.

No.

She was so not going there.

Thumbing off a quick text to Lois asking her for an update, she returned her focus to the task at hand.

Back to Linda.

Plan already forming in her head, she pulled out a small bouncy ball from her pocket and threw it at Winn’s head.  The IT nerd yelped, jumping at the impact and turning to throw a glare over his shoulder.  Alex nodded her head back towards the small alcove behind Linda’s desk.  She’d still be able to see Cat from here but at least Linda wouldn’t see her worrying like a mother hen.

Winn grumbled as he rose, but met her without much fuss, so Alex decided to jump right in.

“I need your help and I know you’re mad at me but I need you to swallow that down for a second.”  Winn blinked when she pulled out her wallet, pulling out a twenty and pushing it into his hand.  “I know you’re not on break or anything but I’ll cover for you with Cat.  I swear.  I just really need you to go grab a donut from Noonan’s.  Maybe a sticky bun too?  I saw Linda eat a sticky bun once so I think she likes those.  And a hot chocolate.  Extra marshmallows.  Please?”

Winn, who had looked two seconds away from ripping her a new one paused.  His eyes blinked slowly again, squinting slightly at the corners as he processed her words, glancing at Linda and then returning to her.

“Sure” He said skeptically.  “No problem…”  a small _knowing_ smile steadily creeping onto his face.  He stuffed the bill in his shirt pocket and turned away. 

Alex scowled as she watched him retreat.  This whole thing was getting out of hand.  First Cat and now Winn?  She needed to get a hold of herself.

She warred with herself the entire time Winn was gone, going back and forth between what she should be doing.  Linda was looking more dejected by the minute and Alex was stuck at her post.  This whole bodyguard thing _sucked._

Finally, Winn was striding across the room, hands full of goodies from Linda’s favorite – or at least what Alex assumed was her favorite—bistro.  Full smile in place, he placed the items on Linda’s desk, saying something that Alex couldn’t hear.  Whatever it was it caused the blonde to blush prettily and smile, bottom lip being pulled between her teeth in a vain attempt to control the expression.  The whole thing made _Alex_ smile.

Until they both looked over at her; Winn’s expression diabolical and Linda’s one of earnest gratitude.  It was Alex’s turn to blush and she steadfastly turned her attention back to Cat’s office, choosing to ignore Winn’s not so quiet titters.

Stupid little man.

* * *

 

When Winn had set the food down in front of her with a whispered “from your secret admirer”, Kara had thought he was just being playful.  Which he probably was, but when he’d nodded towards Alex her heart had thumped strongly in her chest at the implication.

Turning and seeing Alex with a soft smile on her face, staring at _her_ had caused her stomach to flutter, and for once Kara had allowed herself to embrace the feeling.  Carpe diem, right?

The hot chocolate had done much to sooth her nerves.  She’d found over the years that chocolate, real chocolate at least, was something of a mood balancer for Kryptonians.

She’d worked her way through the box slowly, still not used to having such steady access to food.  Alex had taken to ignoring her existence, which was fine.  Kara was learning that she did that when she was embarrassed or unsure.  It was something they could work on.

A stylishly dressed brunette stopping in front of her desk pulled Kara from her inner musings and she had to fight to force the smile onto her face.  Siobhan was pale as usual, nose still primly arched just so as if to permanently remind Kara how much better she was than her.  She was in a black wrap dress with a daring amount of cleavage, red booties, and a simple red apple pendant finishing the look.  In a word she looked like a model.  What she was doing _here_ however, was a mystery.

“Lidia!”  Cat’s voice over her phone halted the question on her tongue.  “Send her in, and yourself too please.”

Smile feeling even more forced, Kara gathered her notepad and pen and rounded the desk.

“Right this way please Ms.…?”

“Smythe.”  Was the curt reply.  Siobhan looking like she was enjoying this all too much.  She always looked like that.  The last time Kara had seen her, when she had laid blame on a botched cleanup on _Kara,_ even though it had been _her_ op, she’d been almost gleeful.

Kara had understood—CADMUS did not respond well to mistakes—but the incident had still soured her towards the woman.  The fact that she was here now, could only mean trouble for everyone.  Inwardly, Kara braced herself for the inevitable fall out.

“Of course.”  Kara said, holding the door open and allowing her to pass.

An assistant upgrade.

Not a promotion. 

Double duty.

Cat was ‘sharing’ her with Lena Luthor for a week.

“Just for the week Ms. Luthor; I trust you understand how difficult it is to find decent help these days.  Lidia has proven herself at least adequate.”  Cat eyed Siobhan, lips pursing together as she tapped her glasses against them.  “Samantha has not.”

Siobhan blinked, and that at least put some joy back in Kara’s world.

“Oh, no; it’s actually Siobhan Ms. Grant.”

The other blonde rolled her eyes—she had a habit of doing that—and picked up her tablet, already moving through her office as they all followed her.

“Listen closely Seamus, I have over five hundred employees, learning names of people who may very well be fired in an hour is not on my list of important things to do.  You will meet Jones in HR, tell him your new assignment.  Once he has gotten the paperwork rolling you will call Joy Behr and schedule her silly interview, tell Chelsea I said yes to drinks, refuse Harrison Ford’s third date request, and get me all of the layouts for tomorrow’s meeting.”  The CEO moved passed Alex, who was holding her elevator door open for her, and looked back at Kara.  “Lisa, let’s go!”

Kara blinked and moved forward, standing in front of an amused Lena Luthor.  She tried to keep the smugness out of her face when the doors closed on her flabbergasted counterpart.

Siobhan Smythe- 0, Cat Grant- 1.

“Her name is Linda.”

Alex’s voice, almost teasing, was the cherry on top of her cake.

She found herself seated at a very fancy restaurant, still feeling slightly off balance and eyes seeking out Alex’s form wherever possible.  She found the sight of the Agent—face open and grinning as she schmoozed with the bartender— had a steadying effect on her.

“I’m sorry _Linda,_ ” Cat said mockingly, menu propped open in front of her “were we boring you with the details of your new assignment?”

“No!  Of course, not Ms. Grant!”  Kara tore her eyes away from the pretty crinkle in Alex’s nose she’d been focused on, choosing instead to turn back to the conversation.  “I was listening I promise!  I’ve just never been here and I was taking in the décor.”  She winced at the excuse, especially when Lena Luthor raised her menu even further to hide the small smile that passed her lips.  Cat’s answering look only serving to make her nervous ramble stretch out even longer.  “You were telling me that Lena was going to be shadowing you for the foreseeable future.  As part of the Women in Business Mentorship Program.  I’ll be assisting both of you until Siobhan learns the ropes as well, same duties just for you and Ms. Luthor now.  She’s taking over her family’s company and you probably both need good press right now, so it’s a wise move.”  She shifted uncomfortably as the two women stared at her, both calculating.  She was used to people staring at her like that at CADMUS, but it still made her feel cold.

“I didn’t add that last part.”  Cat said, lips pinched.

Kara opened her mouth to respond, keeping her clenched hands hidden in her lap, when a waiter came over to take their order.

Both of the powerful women across from her placed their orders; a salmon dish for Ms. Grant and lettuce wraps for Ms. Luthor.

Then three pairs of eyes turned to her.

She swallowed hard, uncomfortable under the gazes directed at her and shifting her weight to try to compensate.  Lena frowned and Kara pulled on her fingers in nervous anxiety, unsure of what she had done to provoke this response.

“And for you Miss?”

The waitress, a pretty woman of middle eastern descent who had her hair pulled back in a tight bun, asked her kindly.

“Oh.”  Kara replied, understanding dawning on her.  “Oh, no thank you.  I don’t—I’m ok.”

She had rules to follow, strict ones she was meant to adhere to.  She was not meant to squander her time on such human trivialities; Kara wasn’t human.  Sustenance was not something she required every day.

The waitress’s smile thinned but she nodded and moved to collect the menu in front of Kara.  Ms. Grant’s hand landing on her arm halted her progress.

“Don’t think I didn’t notice you didn’t have breakfast this morning Lidia; you were up well before time placing calls for the last-minute floral arrangements.  And, aside from that donut Agent Scully snuck you, you haven’t eaten anything else all day.”  Cat’s eyes narrowed at her, searching for something and making Kara squirm.  “If you are truly not hungry than I would ask that you take the rest of the day off to recover from whatever illness has befallen you, but if you are, then please look through the menu.”

Forcing herself to relax, Kara slowly picked up the menu in front of her.  She couldn’t leave Cat to her own devices in such a public space, and with Alex around, it would be more of a hassle to sneak around then to just order something.

The waitress offered her a bright smile and a quick, “I’ll give you a few minutes while I go get your drinks.”

Cat turned to Lena, easing the CEO into a conversation around her expectations for her newly rebranded company, L-Corp.  Kara half listened, attention split between the women and the words in front of her.

In truth, Kara _was_ hungry but she had never eaten here before.  Alex had been showing her all types of different foods, but those were clearly not of the caliber of the restaurant they were currently in.

She scanned the text in front of her futilely, not understanding why any human would enjoy something made with frog legs or a duck’s wings.  Her skin crawled and she desperately wished to be anywhere but here.  She hated this assignment.

It was stupid.

She’d never complain about simple cleanups again.

Her phone chirping pulled her attention and she hastily moved to retrieve it from her purse.  She’d been in contact with the caterer all day and needed to make sure that they would have enough ice at the event.

A message from Alex made her pause and then fight a smile.

|Alex: Their portabella burger is to _die_ for and only sacrificed the flesh of a tiny fungus.  _Sent: 12:37pm_

|Alex: Make sure you get the garlic fries! _Sent 12:37 pm_

Kara glanced over at the bar, but Alex was studiously watching a tv screen mounted to the far wall, phone on the surface in front of her and fries—Kara was guessing they were garlic—in hand.

She was really starting to love that woman.

 

* * *

 

Cornering Siobhan was a matter of skill after that.  Ms. Grant was anything but a slacker, and almost every waking second of the rest of the day was taken up by orders and phone calls.

Cat’s calendar needed a complete overhaul, Kara would need to inform Mr. Olsen that he had just temporarily lost his cushy corner office, and she needed to call Cat’s son’s school and arrange new pickup times and locations.

With the threat still looming, Cat had taken to randomly switching Carter’s schedule.  It was a wise tactic in Kara’s mind, something that would have easily annoyed her had she been given the hit.  But it wasn’t foolproof.  Luckily the DEO had also assigned a detail to Cat’s son; an arrangement she had, for once, not argued.

With a full set of duties on her plate, Kara had not been able to corner Siobhan until they were almost scheduled to leave for the day; and even then, only because she had been asked to walk the brunette through filing procedures.

“What are you doing here?”

The filing room was actually a large room where Cat kept her archived ideas, articles, photo spreads, and any other nick knack that she thought might be useful down the line.  Cabinets lined all four walls, and a heavy wood table sat in the center, ready to be used at a moment’s notice.  Generally, this was where the interns had their brain storming sessions, but Kara had seen more than a few higher ups come in here when they were looking for new material.

It wasn’t easy impressing Cat Grant.

Siobhan barely looked up at the hissed words, the manila folders in her hands taking her full attention.

“My job.  Obviously.”

“That’s not what I mean and you know it.  Why did Lillian send you?”

Siobhan’s eyes flashed dangerously as she looked up at Kara.  “You forget your place.”

A frown pulled at Kara’s lips.  She crossed her arms, her body positioned between the door and the other woman as she stared her down.  She had _not_ forgotten her place.  For some reason, surviving on blind faith, taking everything in stride as she had been trained to do?  The thought made her itch.

If Lillian had sent Siobhan that meant something had happened; it meant that new information had been placed on the board that Kara had not been privy to.  In the past this wouldn’t have bothered her, but now a voice that sounded suspiciously like Alex’s was telling her not to get played.  That this wasn’t normal.

“What are you doing here?”  She repeated, voice flat and posture tensing even further.

“You failed in your mission.  I am here to rectify the situation.”  Siobhan’s voice was self-satisfied, a smug smirk on her lips as she placed her files in their correct cabinets.  “In failing to apprehend the leader of ALFA, you have strained our resources.  Consider me the cleaning crew.”

Kara scowled.

“I have brought in more than a third of ALFA’s leaders.  The intel that I receive is spotty and outdated, how am I supposed to catch a ghost with no proton pack?”

“What?”  Siobhan asked, genuine confusion coloring her voice and face as she paused in her task to fully take in Kara’s face.

The alien valiantly fought and won the battle with the overwhelming urge to blush.  She had _not_ intended to let that Ghostbusters reference slip in there.  She’d have to be a lot more careful with her verbiage with Siobhan around.

“All I’m saying is that if CADMUS wants better results maybe they should get me better intel.”

Siobhan rolled her eyes. “Oh, you poor baby.  Is Spec-Ops not giving you what you need?  Do you want a shoulder to cry on?”

Kara threw her hands up in frustration, unable to control her frustration any longer.

“Seriously?  This is why I can’t work with you!  You’re so annoying.”

“And _you_ are incompetent.  A fact I will prove once and for all when _I_ bring in ALFA.”

“I’m incompetent?  _I’m_ incompetent?  You’re the one who outed your identity in San Pedro—”

“Only because _you_ were late—”

“You never gave me a _time_ —”

“The blaring alarms didn’t give it away?”

“Alarms that you tripped.  Alarms that you blamed on me.  I spent a month in solitary because of you.”

Siobhan hissed at her.  Honest to Rao hissed, turning her back on the blonde and shoving her last folder into the drawer in front of her.

“You did that to yourself.  Lillian saw the mess you left me to clean up; an act that I am forced to do once again.”  She shoved passed Kara, pausing at the door.  “Just so we’re clear, your Op just became my Op.  Same objectives.  Better strap in K-2S0, this is gonna be fun.”

Irritation flooded through Kara and she had to steel herself not to chase the woman down and _murder_ her.  Siobhan was a nuisance that she could never easily get rid of. 

She inhaled deeply, closing her eyes and holding her breath for a count of 5. 

But… she was just that.  A nuisance.  She wasn’t a real problem.

Kara had been working this Op for more than half the year, she knew all the players; had all the leads.  Siobhan was going to be playing catch up for a while.

Kara was just going to gain more ground.

The fact of the matter was that Lillian was testing them both.  There was an alien terrorist group out there hell bent on destroying the world; on annihilating the human race.  CADMUS had a personal interest in seeing them eradicated.  So, they’d sent in their most powerful asset: Kara.  They’d taken her off ice, wiping her and starting with the fragile skeleton of Krypton that somehow always remained.  She’d undergone weeks of programming before they’d placed her at CatCo; they’d invested time and money into her.

If Siobhan was here it meant that they were checking on their investment, not that they thought she would do a better job.  It was a reminder that they owned her.

It also probably had not been Lillian’s idea.  While the older Luthor respected results, and had a firm grip on all of her assets, Siobhan could be… unpredictable in her follow through.

And Lillian couldn’t afford unpredictable on a case like this, which is why she had allowed her team to talk her into using Kara.  Because, while most of their equipment still didn’t work on the Kryptonian, at least not enough that they could track her or send a kill shot at a moments notice, they still had leverage in the form of her daughter.

And they had made sure she had known it.

So, Kara had done her job and kept Lillian’s secret.

CADMUS saw a threat in ALFA, Lillian saw no threats.  Only opportunities. 

ALFA wanted to wage war on humanity; Lillian wanted humans to see that aliens were evil.  Aiding and abetting were considered treason in most governments.  But then again Lillian knew that, which is why she had given them Kara.  Blaming the fallout on an alien asset who had gone rogue?

It was just a neat solution wrapped up in a shiny bow.

Kara was meant to die. 

She’d been ok with it, had made plans to ensure that her daughter would not live the same life she had.  She’d been ready.

But then Alex had made her want to live.

She’d overestimated her time and Lillian’s authority.

She wouldn’t make the mistake again.

CADMUS wanted her to get Alex, and for once Kara was enjoying one of her directives.  She couldn’t stop now even if she wanted to.  But maybe she could find another way… a new way out.  She’d tried before, but she hadn’t had friends then.  Maybe…  She had a mission.

Exhaling slowly, she opened her eyes with renewed determination, leaving the room and heading back towards her desk.

Winn grabbed her on her way out, her beige pea coat tucked into the crook of her arm as she rifled through her bag.  Alex was staying late with Cat but had made her promise to text her when she got home.  Kara wanted to make sure she hadn’t forgotten her rarely used phone anywhere.

Winn rolled his eyes and pulled the device out of her coat pocket.

“Pro tip: it’s always in the place you’re not looking.  Now onto important matters, you my dear have made amazing progress.”

A puzzled expression made its way onto her face.  “I have?”

“Of course, you have!  Were you not present today?  You made Alex get jealous over someone _looking_ at you AND you made her buy you a present!  Do you know how huge that is?  The last thing she ever got me was a gift card.  A very nice gift card that I used on Pop Vinyl’s BUT still an unthoughtful gift card.  She _knew_ you liked sticky buns.  Progress.”

Winn’s beaming smile, brought out her own and she quickly pulled her coat on as they stepped off the elevator, desperate to give her hands something to do.

“Ok.  So, what now?  In the movies, the guy usually asks the girl out at this point so he can learn all of her secrets.”

“Eh- wrong Romeo!  Slowdown.  First, you have decades to go before Alex lets you in on _any_ secrets.  I mean, I don’t even know the woman’s middle name, that’s usually public knowledge.  And second, you still have to get her used to the idea of you being a _romantic_ interest.  You have to start flirting.”

Winn held the door open for her, following her out in the crisp winter air.  It must have been cold because he pulled his coat tighter around him, an act that she mimicked.

“Flirting?”

“Yeah, you know, giggling at her jokes; stroking her biceps; doing the bend and snap.  Flirting.”

Kara nodded filing away all the terms he had just used for further research.  Her face must not have been all that convincing though because Winn’s hand was suddenly pulling her to a halt by the back of her jacket.

“Linda… please tell me you’ve flirted with someone before.”

“Of course, I have.”  She replied indignantly, pulling out his grasp and fighting her blush.  She had flirted with someone before, the Foreign Minister of Turkey three years ago.  Her intent had been a lot more malicious in that case, and she wasn’t keen to use any of the tactics she’d employed on Alex.

“Good…”  Winn said eyeing her suspiciously before continuing their progress across the street.  “Just so we’re clear, Alex is gonna need you to be super clear.  The whole fluttering your eyelashes thing won’t work.  But maybe… oh!  Compliment her!  She won’t know what the hell to do if you give her a genuine compliment.  She’ll stutter all over herself and that’s when you can move in with the touching.  Don’t _overdo_ it but make sure she knows your flirting.  But subtly.”

“Uh huh.”  Kara said, nodding dubiously.  Subtle but obvious.  Easy peasy.

“Tomorrow’s Friday, you guys will have your girly date.  It’s the perfect opportunity!  I’ll talk you up!”

“You’re going to talk to Alex?”

Winn blushed, shrugging his shoulders as he glanced at her aside.  “Yeah…  it’s pretty hard staying this mad at your best friend you know?  Maybe if I show her I’m willing to move forward, she’ll show me that I’m not expendable.”

Kara reached for his hand, squeezing gently.  “You’re irreplaceable Winn.  Alex knows that, even if she isn’t sure how to show it.”

Winn smiled, giving her hand a quick squeeze in return.  “Thanks Linda.”

A warm feeling settled in her chest as they continued on their way; her to her apartment and Winn to the city train.  Siobhan could talk all the crap she wanted, Kara had made progress… had made _friends_ and she wasn’t about to lose it all to Siobhan Smythe.

 

* * *

 

“You look good.”  Hank’s words were unassuming, face relaxed as they walked through the streets of national city.  “Agent Vasquez says you haven’t missed any appointments the past two months; made all your check-ins. “

Alex looked at him from the corner of her eye, taking in the neutral expression. 

“Is there a but somewhere in there?”  She asked, breath just starting to mist in front of her face and prompting her to zip her leather jacket against the biting cold.

December in National City was by far warmer than it had been in either Midvale or Gotham, but it was still cold enough that Alex yearned for Spring already.  She’d never been partial to the cold.  Kara had been excited to see snow, but she’d been taken before Alex had been able to show it to her.  It kind of put a damper on the season for her.

A quick flash of white teeth was Hank’s version of a smile, and he clapped his hand on her shoulder.

“No ‘buts’, Agent Danvers.  Just pride.  Keep up the good work.”

Alex returned his brief smile before refocusing on the task at hand.

“Where are you taking me by the way?  Have you picked up on anything yet?”

Hank’s satisfaction with her work made her stomach flip.  He wouldn’t have said that if he knew what she wanted to do with Linda.  Or how _badly_ she wanted it.  The woman was becoming more and more beautiful to her every day.  It was obnoxious; and very distracting.

“There’s some chatter a few blocks away, we’ll walk pass and confirm.”  The soft order pulled her away from the image of Linda smiling at her with blush stained cheeks as Winn delivered her donuts.  Whatever he had said to her had made her smile for the rest of that day; had made warm brown eyes seek out Alex’s own hazel.  The knowledge that _she’d_ put that smile there, that the _sight_ of her had kept it there… Alex had felt equal parts terrified and exhilarated.

Hank turned a corner and Alex’s eyes flit over their surroundings.

The neighborhood they were in was a busy city area, on the poorer side of things, but far from a ghetto.  If Alex had to guess she would assume the people who lived here, were made up of blue collar workers and maybe new professionals entering the workforce.  That they were here meant that things were worse than Alex had predicted.

Going after the poor or middle-class communities was what won wars… and what lost them.  If ALFA was planning an attack here, then they were either very very stupid or extremely powerful.

Alex wasn’t going to bet on the former.

Hank pulled her over to a bus stop, taking a seat on the worn-out bench and stretching out his legs.  Alex followed his lead, folding her arms over her chest and casually taking in her surroundings.

“Did you see the three people over on that porch?”  Hank asked her, sounding no more interested than if he had been talking about the weather.

“Yeah.”

“They’re from the planet Tortall; pass as humans, but they’re usually the first ones you encounter when trouble comes up.”

Alex frowned, staring down at her shoes—black converse for this occasion—and trying to follow Hank’s train of thought.  “You think they’re part of this?  The biggest one looks like he weighs 120 soaking wet.  They don’t hold themselves like fighters, aren’t aware of their surroundings.  And their fidgety.  Fighters are calm.  Those guys look like they’d spook at a rat.”

“Well observed.”

She scratched her cheek, squinting up at the sun before turning her eyes down the street.  “They’re the scouts.”

Hank offered her a pleased, barely their smile.  “Yes.”

Alex nodded, “what’s our play?”

“You’re asking me?”  Hank raised his eyebrow, his biceps bulging as he shifted his arms.

“Well… yeah.  Why wouldn’t I?”

Hank grunted but said nothing else.

Alex followed his lead, keeping an eye on their perps but also just relaxing and enjoying the calm atmosphere.  It was a nice way to unwind after a long day of listening to Cat Grant bitch at her employees.  It was Thursday which meant that tomorrow she’d be able to start her weekend with her and Linda’s weekly movie night.  So far, they’d watched about 12 films and Alex had started her on about 6 different shows.  The pop culture education was well underway, and Linda was an enthusiastic student.  She’d taken to squeezing Alex’s hand whenever something exciting happened, a development that made Alex’s stomach flutter with want.

“Where did you get the scarf?”

“A friend.”  There was a young family a few blocks away in the park, the mom going down the slide with a toddler who was screaming in joy.  “I think they made it or something.”

“You’ve changed.”  Her boss’s voice was quiet, contemplative.  “You’re more settled.  Not as angry.”

Her gut reaction was to take offense.  For some reason, everyone had always assumed she was angry—a fact that never ceased to make her _angry._ Their need to point it out usually the quickest way to set off her ire.  But Hank wasn’t looking to insult or injure.  His tone of voice was flat, unassuming.  She could deal with that.

Pursing her lips in thought, Alex let her head fall to the back of the bench.  The perps across the street were still doing nothing and she was beginning to wonder how much ALFA paid them for such laziness.

“I don’t feel as angry.”  She admitted, hesitating before continuing slowly with carefully chosen words.  “I’ve decided that maybe I don’t know everything; that maybe I’m not as smart as I thought I was.”  She bit her lip, sending a quick glance at Hank’s stern face before looking back up at the sky.  Pinks and purples just starting to become apparent as the sun started its descent.  “I don’t know, this operation you have me on—dreadful and inhumane as it may be—it’s taught me a lot.  _Patience_.  A whole lot of patience… but also… I met someone who told me that maybe I should give people some leeway, try to be more understanding or whatever.”

There was a brief pause, in which she allowed herself to stretch out completely.  She closed her eyes, basking in the sun and just existing.

“I thought you were supposed to wait a year?”

“For what?”  She blinked her eyes open, looking over at him in confusion, and saw a mask of disappointment.

“For your recovery.”  He replied.  He shook his head with a sigh.  “I was informed that recovering alcoholics should wait at least one year before engaging in any… relations.”

She felt her jaw clench, her entire body tensing with anger and shame even as she forced the words out.  “I’m not having relations.  And I never told you I was in recovery.”

Hank glanced at her, eyes conveying his disbelief.  “Just remember to do your job Agent Danvers.”

His dismissive tone, coupled with the disappointment on his face made white hot fury lance through her and she dug her finger nails sharply into the skin of her forearms.  Not releasing her hold, even when she felt the skin break.

Luckily their targets chose that moment to move, spotting a slow-moving pedestrian cross the street and taking off after them.  She rose with Hank, moving with him as he followed them all into an alley.

The pedestrian was handing something over to the Tortallans, when they noticed Hank and Alex at the mouth of the alley and took off.  Hank cursed.

Alex ran.

She followed the alien easily, a teenaged Ent by the look of her.  The small being moving rapidly and jumping onto a dumpster and then over a fence.  Alex mimicked her actions, taking in the red tinted skin, and greenish black hair.  And—yep, there it was—the cat like tail that emerged from under her coat as she jumped onto a fire escape. 

They made it to the roof of a building, Alex almost pausing to grab her gun, when the damn Ent jumped roofs, forcing Alex to follow.   They crashed together in a heap, the Ent recovering first and knocking Alex solidly in the temple.

She cursed and rolled on her knees, grabbing tail as the Ent tried to run off again.

The girl howled, turning around in anger and lashing out with her claws.  Alex dodged, grabbing one clawed hand and yanking so the girl was forced forward and into Alex’s forehead.  She blinked dazedly, dropping whatever she had in her hand, and lashing out again.

Alex recoiled, grabbing at the device on the floor and hearing her shirt sleeve tear at the impact from the sharp nails.  She cursed the ruined shirt and then dodged again when the Ent hissed at her.  The venom from her spittle burned at Alex’s now exposed arm.

The pain was intense, if not brief, and by the time she’d been able to focus again, the Ent was gone.

She scowled, glancing down at her reddened arm before making her way back over to John. 

The man was where she had left him, just heavy three Tortallans, tossed effortlessly over his shoulder. 

She wasn’t going to ask.

Instead she held up the device the Ent had dropped: a smashed tablet.

“Looks like you need to get in touch with Agent Schott.”  Hank said with a slightly teasing smirk.

“You should do it.”  She countered, limping—that roof jump had _hurt—_ until she’d made it to his side.  “I’m not exactly Winn’s favorite person at the moment.”

“All the better.”  Hank shifted the aliens on his shoulder, looking at the mouth of the alley as a black van reversed towards them.  “Since you’re learning new things, you can learn how to properly apologize.”

Alex glowered.  “Why does everyone think I don’t know how to apologize?”

“No idea.”

Her glower deepened.

“If I go to Winn, then I’ll need a favor from you.  One of my harebrained schemes that will probably save our asses considering the newfound diversity of ALFA.”

Hank dropped his cargo in the back of the van, smiling at the Agent who had opened the doors for him.

“And what’s that?”

 

* * *

 

**_March 2013_ **

_K-2SO blinked slowly, trying and failing to chase away the darkness in their vision.  Where were they?  What had happened?_

_“What did you do?”_

_The horrified voice came from somewhere behind them and they tried to turn their head to the sound, succeeding only in a sloppy head jerk._

_“What you failed to do.”  That voice.  They knew that voice._

_A soft hand caressed their cheek, the contact soothing away the fear that had come with the darkness.  Sight came incrementally, starting with blurry lights and black spots as the two-people continued to converse._

_“This was not the intent of this study.  We were to formulate new ways of healing; propel medicine into the next era with the alien’s genetic code.  Not weaponize it!”_

_The voice was agitated now but her savior payed it no mind, instead smiling when K-2S0 finally managed to focus on her face.  The hand brushed back her hair now, delicately stroking over the short strands._

_“You were getting nowhere.  Your methods were defective.  The alien protected its secrets for years before I came on board and I watched as you failed time and again, never realizing your true error.”_

_Her vision suddenly became razor sharp, schematics blinking into existence, adding a layer of text and images over the real world._

_“Which was?”_

_Her eyes focused on the woman leaning over her, text scrolling as information was fed through her neural pathways._

_“When you come upon a chess game, already set up and halfway through the match, you do not pick up where the other player left off.  It is often useless and time consuming.  If you start from scratch then you can choose your own players, design your own strategies, fortify your defenses… pick your queen.  When you cannot control someone because of their past, you erase it.”  The woman said, pride in her smile as K-2S0 continued to stare at her.  “You take away what made them resist you and remake them into whatever you desire.  They’ll never challenge you again.”_

**Dr. Lillian Luthor:**

**Sex: Female**

**Age: 52**

**Height: 6’ 0”**

**Weight: 143 lbs.**

**Marriage Status: Widow**

**Children: Lex Luthor Age 29, Lena Luthor Age 20.**

**Occupation: Director of Research and Development at CADMUS.**

**Primary Objective: Obey Lillian Luthor.**

_“And what do you plan on doing with it now?”  Lillian’s brow scrunched in annoyance at the other man, causing the feeling to be mirrored in K-2S0.  Lillian Luthor should not be questioned; she was to be obeyed at all costs._

_“Do you know who you are?”  Lillian’s soothing voice pulled her back into a sense of calm and she stared up into greyish blue eyes._

_Oh._

_She was laying down._

_“I am K-2S0.”_

_Harsh footsteps pounded, and the man that had only been a voice before was suddenly standing next to Lillian, shock written all over his pale face.  He was tall in stature, standing slightly above Lillian, and balding.  His pale blonde hair only really visible on the sides of his head, the top portion shiny and glistening in the fluorescent lighting.  A white lab coat was pulled over blue scrubs, a pen stain in his front breast pocket._

_Next to Lillian, standing tall and regal in a black skirt and white blouse under her own lab coat, he looked like someone’s castoff._

_“And do you know who I am?”  Lilian asked, thumb stroking the skin in front of K-2S0’s ear._

_“You’re my creator.”_

_“Yes.  I am.”  Lillian’s smile was smug, and the man behind her moved his hands over his chest and then to his waist and chest.  K-2S0 knew this gesture.  Her database informed her that it was the sign of the cross.  A religious gesture done in prayer, as a blessing, or to ward off evil._

_Was K-2S0 evil?_

_“No. You are not.”  That was Lillian again, and K-2S0 moved her eyes back to the woman in front of her, not realizing she had spoken out loud.  “You are a tool; a weapon that we created to combat our enemies.  There will be people who wish to harm you; they cannot.  There will be those who wish to steal you; you must not let them.  They will unleash unimaginable pain on you.  I will protect you from them in return for your service.  I will make sure that you have all the tools you need to protect yourself.”_

_“Who are they?”_

_“Humans; aliens; everyone you encounter could be an enemy.  Your life and the survival of this organization will depend on whether or not you can master your training.”  She paused before pulling a tablet from the man’s hands and tapping at it.  When she was satisfied with what she had done, she turned the screen towards K-2SO.  “There is one danger you must be extremely wary of; an elite government organization.  They call themselves the DEO, Department of Extranormal Operations, and they would sooner destroy you and your kind than offer any quarter.  You will eliminate any who stand in the way of your objectives, is that clear K-2SO?”_

_“Yes ma’am.”_

_Lillian smiled, and K-2SO felt her chest fill with warmth.  Lillian approved of her answer.  She’d said the right thing._

_“Good girl.  Now I need a demonstration for my superiors.  If you would?”  The woman moved back from the table as it rose and lifted K-2SO into a vertical position.  The harness holding her to the platform fell away and she dropped to her knees, the muscles in her legs spasmed in pain from disuse._

_Lillian frowned, the lines in her face becoming harsh._

_On shaking legs, K-2SO forced herself up, trying to straighten her spine even as her body protested the movements._

_Then Lillian was tapping at her tablet, and the display that had been layered over the real world became active once again.  A door opened to her left and she saw data appear at the same time humans came into view.  Something in her stomach sank, a sick feeling taking over her and making her retreat a step._

_It was a man in a pinstriped suit; he was tall in stature with green-slicked back hair.  His was face painted a sickly white; the makeup thick and cracked from dirt and sweat, and a sadistic red smile was splashed across his face.  He was bound and gagged and, when he saw her, laughter started flowing freely.  Tears of mirth formed in his eyes and he started humming behind the gag in his mouth making him seem more than a little insane._

_Nevertheless, he was human._

_She was not meant to harm humans._

_The man’s gag slipped from the excess saliva and he cackled, as the melody he had been humming became a full-blown song.  “ **Kal-El had a little lamb**.”  He sang through his laughter, body shaking in obvious glee._

_She was not meant to harm anyone._

_“ **It followed him to earth one day**.”_

_“Kill him.  Kill any who stand in our way.”  Lillian was at her shoulder, staring intently at the man in front of them._

**_“Which was against the rules_ ** _.”  The man swayed in his insanity, grin large and mischievous as if he knew something she didn’t._

_Her face felt hot, eyes turning an intense blue as the man’s maniacal laughter increased with the volume of his song._

_The man sent Lillian a look of pure glee, the red paint on his face making him look like a cartoon character._

_“You have no idea what wrath you have unleashed.  This is worse than the Bat; you’ll never even see it coming.”_

_Blue beams of intense heat rocketed from her eyes straight into his, obliterating them before consuming his entire head.  There was no blood._

_Anything that might have escaped was incinerated._

_He didn’t laugh after that._

_There was nothing but quiet._

_And guilt._

_And Lillian’s proud smile bearing down on her._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh Kara. I *think* that's the last we see of Kara in CADMUS for a while. Most of the other flashbacks will either be happier or about Alex. I think I've put my darling through enough.
> 
> Also, the Joker was killed here for no other reason than that I hate him so much. Like in my hate heart there is Jason Todd's Mom, the Joker, and Scar from the Lion King. So obviously I could only realistically kill the Joker. Although, not gonna lie, new team Arrow is working really hard to get in there.
> 
> Also, Lena! I really do like Lena, I don't ship her with anyone currently but I really think she has such awesome potential as a character. Therefore I gave her a super minor role in my story lol. No, just kidding. She won't be a main player but she will be around.
> 
> Idk why but I have a thing for jealous Alex. Even when her jealousy is unwarranted. Lena was legit just wondering wtf was going in with Kara's eyes. It's kind of a play on how everyone thinks Katie gives sex eyes to everyone and she's just like "I'm living my life guys." I personally think its the eye color... and the pout... and well yeah, Katie gives sex eyes. Some people just have that face you know?
> 
> For anyone whose mad at Hank/J'onn eh... I get it. Yeah, it's fine BUT it is explained in an upcoming chapter really well. 
> 
> So, hopefully this shed some light on some of your questions regarding Kara and her purpose and why CADMUS doesn't know about the camp. There will obviously be more explanations but as this was orginally a Winter Soldier AU, the fact that Lillian developed tech to wipe Kara's memory whenever she wanted shouldn't be a surprise. Also, the whole Stockholm Syndrome was done on purpose much as it breaks my heart. To Kara, Lillian made her. She knows she was born on Krypton and had a family, but according to her programming, Lillian is her master and that brings certain feelings into play. Especially because as we saw before, Lillian is the only one who can stop her torture sessions. Psychology is fascinating.
> 
> Anyway, what'd you guys think?
> 
> And has anyone seen Jessica Jones, cause Trish was a close runner up to my murder scene. >_<.


	9. I Know The Truth Now (And I Don’t Love You Anymore)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last Chapter:
> 
> We met Lena and Siobhan.
> 
> Found out more of Cadmus' plan; Lillian is sending Kara to her death.
> 
> Kara is working on an escape?
> 
> And Alex had a tense convo with Hank that activated her fight or flight response.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I apologize for the delay. Two things: I got whammied at work and have been sleeping most of my free time and I was also writing a one-shot that I'm gonna try to stay awake to post tonight and that made me kind of..... forget.
> 
> My bad.
> 
> This chapter is unbeta'd so any mistakes are my own. I make no apologies. Gives it character.
> 
> Song: Everybody's Fool by Evanescence

** I Know The Truth Now (And I Don’t Love You Anymore) **

**_August 27, 2008_ **

_“What is the purpose of your earthly games?”_

_“What do you mean?” Alex asked, hand clasped tightly around Kara’s and pulling her steadily towards the backyard._

_“What do they teach you?”  Kara’s voice was puzzled as she allowed herself to be dragged along._

_A warm feeling settled in Alex’s chest at the inherent trust that Kara was affording her.  They had after all only known each other for a few months.  Allowing someone to take you somewhere strange was brave, even for super powered people.  The fact that Kara wouldn’t go somewhere with just anyone, that she was allowing it because it was Alex, made her heart beat double time._

_A quick glance back revealed that the blonde was just barely floating.  Alex had thought she was moving too easily._

_She frowned at the other girl, looking pointedly at her feet.  Kara offered her a sheepish grin and returned to the ground, a pretty blush over taking her face even as she stuck out her tongue at Alex._

_The brunette chuckled, facing forward once more as they neared their destination.  “Some of our games can teach you something.”  Alex explained, coming to a stop near a tree.  “Speed, endurance, accuracy.  Hide and seek might be very useful for camouflage tactics I guess.  But really, we mostly just play around for fun.”_

_“Fun.” Kara repeated, looking around at the fields of grass around her and rolling the word on her tongue.  Alex could tell from her facial expression that the word felt foreign to her and wondered if they had reached another cultural breach._

_“Yeah.  What’d you do for fun on Krypton?”_

_Kara exhaled slowly, body relaxing as her eyes settled on the slightly browning leaves in the tree above them._

_Alex wished she had a camera.  Posed like this, Kara looked ethereal.  The afternoon sun was just beginning to set, casting hues of gold and red into Kara’s honey blonde hair.  The girl’s locks were loose, flowing gently in the slight summer breeze and playing skillfully around the frame of her face, dipping over ocean blue eyes._

_Alex loved her eyes._

_It’s something she’d never really appreciated in Kal-El.  Both Kryptonians had blue eyes; both of their eyes were an other worldly shade, Kara’s leaning more towards a turquoise to Kal’s cerulean, glowing from somewhere inside.  As if someone had a dimmer on its lowest setting.  It was hard to see unless you were paying attention.  Alex had never paid attention to Kal’s eyes._

_Not like she had with Kara’s._

_His eyes had never made her words come in stuttered breaths or made her heart throb._

_“I enjoyed flying.  Not like how I do here on earth.”  Kara started haltingly, looking back down into Alex’s own eyes.  “We had Kay’logs.  They were amazing creatures.  They lived in the high mountains and would come down every Sondheim to lay their eggs in the hot springs…  Think of a very large bird.  Bigger than a bear with 4 very large wings.”  The blonde stretched her arms out on either side, to display the wingspan of the creature she was describing; face alight in fond memory.  “They had skin, not fur, like a reptile… in tones of blue and reddish browns.  Semi-long jaws like on your iguana… four legs…”  Her voice trailed off turning wistful, and making Alex reach for her hand.  She squeezed gently, trying to offer some comfort._

_“They sound amazing.”_

_Kara looked back out towards the open field, voice halting as she continued.  “We bonded with them when we were young.  Each noble house was responsible for the well being of their stable.  Saljane, my Kay’log… she chose me… we took care of each other.”  A somber cloud dropped over them, before Kara’s expression suddenly turned excited, a beaming smile stretching across her face.  She moved her hands around animatedly as she started on her next tale.  “We used to have these races every year, to celebrate Rao’s triumphant victory over Cythonna, bringing an end to the cold.  The victor would claim their prize, one year my uncle Jor-El won a kiss from Lara Lor-Van, that was the year she finally decided to enter her name into the Matricomp.  She said that being able to love him was worth the risk of being paired with someone else.  Saljane and I won for three years straight before…”  Another pause as Kara looked down at her feet, before quietly offering, “she was my best friend.”_

_“I’m sorry.”  Alex said, and she was.  She couldn’t imagine losing Vicky, her own best friend, let alone her parents, teachers, and everyone she had ever known; her entire planet.  Kara was a walking miracle._

_Kara shook her head.  “I was lucky to have known her; to have known any of them.  I would not want to live as Kal-El has.  To be part of an amazing people, and remember none of it.  To never have known my mother’s laugh, or my father’s kiss… I wish I still had Krypton, but in its loss I can only be happy that I at least had their love.”_

_It was Alex’s turn to shake her head as she tugged the other girl into a tight hug.  “You’re amazing, you know that right?”_

_Kara returned the embrace much more meekly, still unsure sometimes of her strength, which had come in fluctuating waves.  The Danvers’ elders had surmised that she was like a teenager in puberty where their hormones went in and out of whack.  As Kara’s body got used to her new powers, it needed to turn the abilities off to allow for balance._

_As such Kara had been exceedingly cautious in all things, sometimes moving too slow, and others blurring at the edges as her speed kicked in.  With the current watch on their house, the changes made Eliza and Jeremiah nervous.  They didn’t blame Kara, but if she had an incident in front of the wrong people she could set off some unwanted alarms._

_“Yes, I do.”  Was the confirmed reply.  Alex shoved the giggling blonde away mouth pulling into a fake grimace as she glared at her counterpart._

_“No more hanging out with Dad, sarcasm is unbecoming on you Kara.”_

_The blonde laughed, tangling their fingers together and gently swinging their clasped hands._

_“Are you going to show me your game or not?”_

_Alex’s scowl lasted for another few seconds before she finally broke and started explaining Hide-and-go-seek to Kara.  One person was the hider, the other the seeker._

_Kara nodded thoughtfully, lips pursed in concentration.  “And which role am I?”_

_“You’ll be the seeker this first time around.”  Alex said, pulling out a pair of noise canceling ear buds and a linen scarf.  “I’ll go hide.  You count to twenty, then take these off and come find me.”  She tied the scarf around Kara’s head, securing it around her eyes, and then placed the earbuds in._

_Kara’s expression turned unsure, hands out in front of her in unease.  “Do I start now?”_

_Alex smiled, temporarily pulling one earphone out to answer.  “Yes.”_

_She took off, unable to suppress the swell of excited energy that coursed through her as Kara started counting.  She hadn’t felt like this since she was a little girl, high on the threat of competition.  For some reason, introducing Kara to these games had a similar effect to what she had experienced back then._

_Adrenaline coursed through her as she ducked under a low hanging branch, seeing her house in her peripherals when she purposefully wiggled a branch and made some leaves fall.  Eliza had been on Jeremiah to get a fresh coat of paint on the white washed boards, and there were a few tiles that would eventually need to be repaired on the blue grey roof.  They’d had a pretty rough hurricane season last year, and it had revealed all sorts of imperfections._

_Like this convenient hidey hole that she doubled around to, nestled in the roots of a tall tree.  She squirmed through the crawl space and out the other end, carefully maneuvering down a slope of rocks and then pressing herself back against the cliff side.  Below her was sand and rocks, from here she was still a good way from the surf but she was counting on being close enough that the salt air would help mask her smell.  The hiding spot also had the benefit of being inconspicuous; if Kara happened to look out over the edge, she’d be hard pressed to spot Alex.  And lastly, the winds on this side of the cliffs offered just enough gust that she was hoping she wouldn’t be heard either._

_Perfect spot._

_Now she just had to settle in and wait; this might take a while._

_“Now what?”_

_Kara’s head popped out of the hole where the tree was and Alex startled, her reflexes saving her from a very embarrassing and probably painful tumble.  It still set her legs moving enough that she either had to run or perish in agony, which would have been fine—Alex was on the soccer team, she had experience in running on odd terrains—but the cliff face just got rockier the closer she got to the bottom.  One stumble and she’d be faced with an angry Eliza and a trip to the ER._

_Her foot hit a loose rock, and she just knew her ankle was going to twist and send her rolling.  But then spindly spaghetti arms were wrapping around her from behind and she was suddenly looking up at sky._

_Kara took the brunt of the impact, landing with a slight ‘oomph’ and then allowing their momentum to continue to roll them until they came to a stop on the sand.  Alex raised herself up on her arms, hastily brushing blonde hair out of Kara’s face as she searched for any injuries._

_“Are you ok?”  She asked, even though, logically, she knew Kara couldn’t really be hurt.  At least not by something like this._

_Kara grinned up at her excitedly, grabbing her hands and holding them out at their sides._

_“Found you!”  She cried.  Alex had just enough time to take in the sight of her smile, hair tangled and windswept, blue eyes dancing with joy, right before Kara leaned up and captured Alex’s lips in a kiss._

_To say it was unexpected would be gracious.  This was beyond anything Alex could have imagined.  For one: since when was Kara gay?  And for two: wow.  Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow._

_This kiss was quick but Alex still felt it all through her veins; a surging heat that sent her head spinning.  Kara pressed their lips together, mouth opening just slightly to tease at Alex’s top lip.  A warmth and want that she had never knew she could experience; raised brows dropping to a soft furrow at the sensations.  It was good.  It was amazing.  Alex had obviously died falling down that cliff and was now in heaven.  No other explanation could suffice for how good this was._

_And then she was gone._

_Sunk back into the sand, stupid grin still on her face.  “I won.”  Kara said triumphantly, hands dropping to rest on Alex’s hips._

_Alex looked at her dumbly, barely even acknowledging that she was straddling the other girl.  For the next several moments she was only able to comprehend how windy it was here on the sand, how beautiful Kara looked spread out like some beached Mermaid, and how much she wanted to do that again._

_She was done for._

_There was no going back at this point._

_Alex Danvers was certain that no one would ever be able to kiss her like Kara just had._

 

* * *

 

“It’s the internet wire.”

Winn yelped.  Jumping about half a foot in the air when she approached him from behind.  She frowned, making sure to keep her distance from the clearly uncoordinated man.  She’d rather not get hit in the face by a rookie agent, thank you very much.

“Jesus Christ Alex!  Wear a damn bell!”  Winn’s hands shot up to his chest in vain attempt to calm his racing heart, Alex looking on nonplussed.  “Why the hell do you have to sneak up on me?”

“Because you’d run away otherwise.”  Winn scoffed, hands fiddling with his tie as he moved back to the computer in front of him.  “It’s the internet wire.” She repeated.

“First of all, it’s called an _ethernet_ cable.  Not an internet wire.  And secondly,” he started, pulling the aforementioned blue cable from behind the desk.  “Why is it cut?”

Alex fought not to shift her weight.  Normally she’d have a good laugh at her own antics, but being sober and in a fight with one of her best friend’s kind of put a damper on things. 

As it was, she had had to do _something_ to get Winn to talk to her.  Going to him as his superior officer had seemed like it would only make things worse.  So, instead, she’d cut the internet wire in James Olsen’s office and had waited for him to send in a ticket to IT to get it fixed.  Winn being one of the most competent individuals in the department was in charge of catering to the department heads, hence why they assigned him the task of fixing the Photo Head’s internet woes.

She’d simply needed to wait for him to come down after that.

“I cut it.”

“Uh huh.”  Winn said, pulling some tools out of his kit and setting them up on James’ desk.  “And you couldn’t just unplug it because…?”

“… I thought he might think to plug it back in.”

Winn chuckled, using a tool to make a neat splice on the longer end of the cable.  “He wouldn’t have.  Last week he called me in because the pen for his tablet wasn’t working… it needed new batteries.  The week before that he needed to know how to turn on his speakers.  I told you before, Mr. Olsen is very technologically challenged.”

Alex felt herself relax at the easy comradery, smiling slightly as she watched Winn work.

“I need your help.  As Agent Schott.”  She waited for him to nod before she pulled the tablet from behind her back.  “Director Henshaw and I tracked a target we believe is tied to ALFA, but unfortunately we lost her.  We managed to grab this before she got away.”

“Is that the reason for the shiner?” 

Blinking in confusion, she raised a questioning hand to her face. 

“Not there.”  Winn continued, gesturing towards her ear with his crimping tool.  “On the side, near your temple.”

She winced when her fingers touched the tender skin.  She hadn’t even noticed that.

“Yeah.”  She confirmed, sighing as she held the tablet out to him.  “Do you think you can get anything off of it?”

Winn’s face went thoughtful as he plugged James’s newly repaired ethernet cable into his computer and accepted the smashed tablet.

“These things don’t have hard disk drives.  That could be a good thing or a bad thing.”  He turned the tablet to and fro, looking at it from all angles.  “Generally speaking, I’ve had a hell of a lot more luck rebuilding HDD’s and recovering data than I ever have with flash memory.  It’s a whole different monster.  Like rebuilding a colt .45 vs. a bazooka.”

Alex winced at the comparison, easily able to understand the task with the visual provided.

“Whatever you can get off it would be helpful.  We just need… _something.”_

Winn nodded in understanding.  “I’ll do my best, you know that.”

Alex smiled, feeling at ease around the man for the first time in weeks.

“Thanks Winn.”

“No problem.  And Alex?  Next time you decide you want my attention, just unplug the wires.  No need for the theatrics.”

She smiled, already turned to leave as she paused in the doorway.  “Deal.”

She took another step, but paused again when he called her back.

“One more thing,” Winn started.  “Linda.  When you see her tonight can you—”

“I’m not going to see her tonight.”

Winn blinked in confusion, eyes darting to a calendar behind him.  “But it’s Friday.  You guys usually have your girly dates on Fridays.”

Alex’s eyes narrowed at the mention of the routine, feeling the earlier tension seep back into her limbs.

“That’s probably going to change.  I’ve been skirting my duties spending so much time with a civilian.  I need to—”

“No.”  Winn’s eyes widened and he rounded the desk, tablet flailing in his wildly swinging hands.  “No Alex.  Do not do this to her.”

“I’m not doing anything.”

Winn looked like he had when she’d told him Steve Jobs had died.  “Alex, please.  I know you have your issues, but that girl genuinely cares about you.  Cutting her out is—”

“I’m not cutting anyone out!”  She almost didn’t recognize her own voice, cold and rough as it was.  “Linda and I are colleagues.  That’s it.  I’m focusing on my job.  You should do the same.”

Winn shook his head, arms dropping limply at his sides.  “Alex… you were happy.  You _laughed._ You liked her… You— _”_

“That’s enough Winn.”  She curled her shaking hands into fists, forcing herself to remain steady.  “I do _not_ have feelings for Linda Taylor.  I barely know her!  We’re not even friends, we—”

A throat clearing behind her, stopped her mid tirade.  She watched Winn’s eyes bug out his head, felt her stomach drop, already knowing who had interrupted them.

“Um Winn?”  Linda’s voice, unlike her own, was not steady and Alex shut her eyes, wanting to take her own gun and shoot herself in the foot.  “Ms. Grant needs you.  I tried rebooting her computer but I think she’s just locked herself out.”

“Um yeah.  I’ll be right there.”  Winn replied, hands back at his tie.

Linda whispered a quiet ‘thanks’ and was gone.

Alex hadn’t even had the guts to turn and look at her.

“I’ll have this to you by tomorrow Agent Danvers.”

Alex winced at the title.  “Winn—”

“Stop.”  The man said, slicing his hands in front of him.  “I can’t… Every time I think you’ve—just stop Alex.”

And, because she was such a failure, she didn’t have the guts to watch him leave either.

 

* * *

 

Returning to Cat’s office had been extremely trying for Kara.  She’d had low expectations going into her friendship with Alex.  Had reminded herself time and again that even if _she_ enjoyed Alex’s company that didn’t mean that Alex necessarily enjoyed hers.

Still.  She’d _thought_ they’d been friends.

The movie nights that they’d shared the past few weeks had been more than that.  Alex had introduced her to a new cuisine every week.  When Kara had discovered pot stickers, she thought she’d died and returned to Krypton.  The small dumplings had tasted almost identical to the Meklu that her father had purchased for her from the street vendors at the fairs. 

She’d have been half in love with Alex for that alone.

But it had been _more_ than that.

They’d talked.

Not about anything too deep— both she and Alex had severely avoided any topics having to do with the past—but about what they thought about certain topics.  The movies they watched; the books that Kara had binge read to impress Alex and then come to love all on her own; Alex’s future recommendations; Winn; Alex’s friends Maggie and Felicity; whether or not Betty White was an immortal vampire; the inevitable zombie apocalypse—Costco was clearly a no go; and whatever else had come to their minds. 

It was silly stuff, but it had meant the world to Kara.  To be able to have a normal conversation with someone; a conversation where she barely had to think about making up some sort of back-story or bending the truth.

On top of that, although the topics of conversation may have seemed superficial to most, Kara had learned so much by just _listening._ Like how Alex liked adventures and mysteries, but despised needless deaths; how she was an adrenaline junkie; how she loved pizza and hated potato salad; how she believed in the good in people—even if she hadn’t said the words—the characters she idolized were almost always people that everyone else overlooked.  The ones that saved the day.  Alex wanted to be a hero.

Kara already saw her as one.

She had vague memories of the night she’d killed Agent Marcado, but she could remember how angry Alex had been.  How, even in her anger, she had gotten Cat out of a dangerous situation.

She was unorthodox but she was kind.

At least Kara had thought she was.

It wouldn’t be the first time she was wrong.

“Did someone die Lisa?”

Kara startled, the pen in her hand dragging across her neat page of notes, eyes flying up to stare into Cat Grant’s unimpressed face. 

The CEO was sat behind her desk, leaning over the layouts for tomorrow’s edition of Catco Magazine.  Lena Luthor had gone back to her own office for the second half of the day taking Siobhan with her (thank Rao).  Kara had been listening to Cat dictate her schedule changes when she’d thrown out the unexpected question.

“Um, no Ms. Grant.  Not that I’m aware of.”  She stated, straightening her posture and pushing her glasses back up her nose.

“Then why on earth do you look like you just found your first wrinkle?”  Cat stood, mouth pinched in annoyance, and rounded her desk.  She leaned against the furniture casually, crossing her arms and tapping the arm of her glasses against her teeth in thought.  Then her attention darted to somewhere behind Kara and she rolled her eyes in exasperation.  “If this has _anything_ to do with Agent Scully Lisa, so help me God, I will fire you!”

Kara froze, forcing herself not to turn and look at Alex’s usual spot by the elevator.

“Um, no?”

“Is that a question?”

“No?”  Kara winced at the squeaky tone of her voice.  In her defense, Cat was _scary._

“Get your things we’re going to lunch.”

“Um OK?”

Cat glared at her as she grabbed her own coat and bag, stalking past her without a backward glance.

“NOW LISA!”

Kara hurried to catch up.

Alex had trailed them by about 5 feet on Ms. Grant’s energized walk across the city, her distance both soothing Kara and causing her anxiety.  The woman was a paradox.

Cat chose Noonan’s for their meal –even though technically they had already _had_ lunch, but Kara decided it was in her best interests not to mention that part.  She steered Kara over to the bar, sitting in front of a server and asking for two martinis and a basket of fries.  The server, a cute dimpled Asian girl gave them a smile as she started working on their order.

Kara gingerly sat next to her boss, unsure of what to say or do.

And ever aware of Alex, the woman choosing to sit on the other end of bar.  Far enough away to give them privacy but close enough that she’d be able to react if anything were to happen. 

Alex was a good agent.

And a good person… she—

“Stop staring Lisa, it’s unbecoming.”

Kara flushed, eyes darting to the drink that was being placed in front of her.  The cute bartender smiled at her before moving off to Alex to see if she wanted anything, her long dark ponytail swinging behind her.

“Sorry Ms. Grant.”

“And stop apologizing.”

“Yes Ms. Grant.”

The CEO heaved a sigh, rolling her eyes and pulling her glass to her lips.  After taking a sip the older woman turned serious eyes on Kara, studying her as she played with the olive skewer in her drink.

“Do you know why I hired you Lisa?”

No.  Kara in fact did not.

“Because of my resume?”

Cat scoffed, picking an olive off the skewer with her teeth.  “Hardly.  The lies that your resume told were impressive.  Whoever wrote it up for you was very grandiose.  No.  The reason I hired you was because of your rather sunny disposition.  My $400 an hour shrink says that I suffer from seasonal depression, I thought your brightness might help with that.”  Cat narrowed her eyes at her, expression calculating and making Kara squirm in her seat.

“I’m sorry Ms. Grant.  I’ll um… cheer up?”

“What I don’t understand Laura,” Cat continued as if Kara had never spoken, “is why you have allowed yourself to fall so low so fast.  Agent Scully is attractive sure, but she hasn’t done anything of import for you… no paid bills, no children, no sex…. So why the teenage melodrama?”

“Um… I’m not sure—”

“There are going to be people in this world who do not treat you the way you deserve to be treated Linda, your job is to not allow those people into your circle.  If Scully wants to mope and sulk and string some other girl along than that’s her problem.  _You…_ you are a smart, capable, strong, and kind young woman.  You will not allow her to do the same to you.”  Fries were placed in front of them and Cat gestured for her to eat, pausing until she saw Kara take a fry.  “Until that woman learns to treat you in a manner befitting a woman of your caliber than I would advise you to stay away.”

Kara frowned, a sinking feeling in her stomach at the thought of not seeing Alex anymore.  “But—”

“No buts.”  Cat narrowed her eyes as if daring Kara to dispute her, giving a slow nod when no argument was forthcoming.  The CEO pursed her lips, fingers drumming on the bartop as she crossed her legs.  Her slacks rising to show off her nude pumps and calf muscles.  “You millennials are an odd bunch, you’ll fight for the rights of a plankton but refuse to fight for your own self-worth.  People are not allowed to treat you in the manner that _they_ want, they should be expected to treat you in the manner that you _deserve_.  You need to demand respect Linda, otherwise you will be given none.  The people that deserve to be around you will stay, no one else will matter.  Scully will see that… or she won’t.  She’s not the only woman who you can spend time with.”

Kara chewed slowly around a mouthful of fries, Cat’s words slowly sinking in.  Winn had said something similar in regards to Alex.  How she needed to treat him better. 

But… up until today Alex had treated her just fine.  Amazingly even.

She glanced surreptitiously at the agent, taking in her pinched expression as she glared at the cup of water in front of her.

She’d been glaring when she’d told Winn they weren’t friends too…

Maybe she had just had a bad day?

She scratched idly at the slight lump behind her ear.  It wasn’t an excuse, she wasn’t spending time outside of CADMUS to be told how much she wasn’t liked.  Siobhan would do for that.  Her objective was to get close to Alex, she could do that without the relationship part.  She could watch her from afar.

It would be better than allowing herself to feel like this again.

“Thank you, Ms. Grant.”

Cat made a noncommitting noise, eyes on the screens hanging above the bar as she idly sipped at her martini.  “I have no idea what for; this conversation never happened.”

Kara smiled because… well at least that hadn’t changed.

She relaxed into her stool, slowly devouring the fries and allowing the white noise of the bar to ease her mind.

 

* * *

  

The next week had been excruciating for Alex.

She hadn’t realized how much she had come to enjoy Linda’s company until she lost it completely.  The beaming smiles, and charming laugh that she’d come to look forward to had been almost completely torn out of her life.

She still saw Linda, just not in any capacity that mattered.  The blonde was careful to avoid her at work, staying at her desk or by Cat or Lena’s sides at all times.  Alex hadn’t even seen her go to the bathroom; not that she’d waited.  That’d be creepy.  It was just that… well she missed her.

Desperately.

And now, to top it all off, she had to watch James Olsen’s awkward flirting skills in the employee lounge.  She’d heard the distinctive laugh she’d missed and had gone to check if maybe she could squeeze into the conversation, only to be confronted with the sight of the brawny black man smiling charmingly at an apparently charmed Linda Taylor.

She felt a little throw up in her mouth.

“Gross isn’t it?”

Winn’s voice didn’t startle her, she’d seen the small man approach from her peripherals and had been waiting to see which side of him she’d get today.

“Extremely.”  She said, backing away from the view and turning to Winn.

“This is the decrypted data you asked for.”  He said, handing her an SD card and a fresh tablet.  “It’s mostly blueprints, traffic routes.  Looks like either a cartel or some sort of trading… something illegal for sure.  There’s one address of interest I highlighted, looks like it might be worth checking out.”

Alex nodded, accepting both items.  “Thanks.”

“Just doing my job Assistant Director.”

Alex sighed, but let the IT guru walk away, Linda’s quiet laugh making her jaws clench and her feet move away from the scene behind her.

This was such bullshit.

Going through the data proved to distract her from how often Linda actually left her desk after that.  She did _not_ want to think of her going to visit James Olsen.  Winn had said the man was an idiot.  Linda deserved more than some idiot hitting on her at work.  Weren’t there rules about that?

Cringing internally at her ridiculous attitude she scanned through the files in question.  Winn was right, this was definitely from some sort of illegal operation.  No way did anyone non-government need to know the patrol routes of the NCPD. 

The address he had highlighted was a night lounge/club named Cimil.  The Mayan God of the Underworld.  The chances that this club was related to the name Usukan were a little too high for Alex not to check it out.  Plus, it was fairly close to home. 

A club on a Friday night.  Fun.

Deciding to go it alone – Maggie was doing a taste test dinner with Kate and neither Winn nor Linda were talking to her—she made her way to her apartment after securing Cat with Agent Jones.

Alex had had a lot of party experience when she and Felicity had been at MIT, except Felicity had been more into sarcastic stoicism and Alex had been into alcohol and anything else that would help her forget.  Like sex. 

Choosing an outfit wasn’t difficult.  In the past she had chosen her party clothes based on whether or not she thought Marisa Tomei would sleep with her.  Now, when she pulled on the strappy black dress, she found her mind drifting to Linda and the inevitable blush that would happen if she ever saw Alex like this.

Melancholy swamped her as she applied her makeup.  When she’d left Hank with the van, she’d told herself he was right.  That she was recovering.  He’d told her she was doing better and she told him she wanted to fuck it all up again.

He didn’t deserve that.

And Linda deserved more than a career driven alcoholic.

That didn’t mean that Alex had wanted her out of her life _completely._ She hadn’t expected Linda to be around when she was arguing with Winn.  Hell, she hadn’t even meant to say the words.  They weren’t even _true._

She was angry and frustrated and it had resulted in word vomit as usual.  Linda hadn’t so much as talked to her since, and it had been a _week_. 

Not that Alex had had the courage to speak to her either.  She’d wanted to – _God, she’d wanted to—_ but she could never shake her nerves; never think of the right words to say.

So now here she was, leaving her apartment, dolled up and feeling pissed at not having a chance to try to get to walk Linda home and _talk_ to her. 

The blonde had been leaving on time with the rest of the staff and Cat had been staying late as usual.  The woman had a son for goodness sake!

The walk was short, but it still afforded her enough time for some more self-flagellation.  Alex took a deep breath when she came upon the busy club, steeling herself and flashing a flirty smile to the bouncer.  He smiled back, pulling the divider away and waving her on in front of the line that was starting to run around the block.

She sighed as she found a seat at the bar, ordering an O’Doul’s and picking at the label.  The non-alcoholic beer wouldn’t help her fit in if _everyone_ knew it was non-alcoholic. 

The Linda issue would have to be shelved, as well as the rest of the issues in her shitty life.  Right now, she needed to be social.

 

* * *

 

Kara sighed as she carried another crate over to the black pickup truck.  She’d stopped off at her apartment before coming to help Ni gather more supplies for the camp and had changed into more comfortable clothing.

The kind of clothing Ms. Grant would certainly not appreciate.

Ni, however, had not been able to stop trilling about how nice she thought Kara’s jeans were, and the pretty colors of her plain cotton t shirt and mint green jacket.  In all honesty Kara didn’t really have an opinion on the fashion of it all.  She just knew that they were comfortable.  Way more comfortable than what Ni had chosen to wear. 

For some reason, the alien had thought going out in a nun’s habit would make her inconspicuous.  Kara was still puzzling over the reasoning, but she had learned when it came to Ni it was best to not ask questions.  The woman’s eccentricities knew no limits.

She’d been a mission to Kara at first, one of her first after Lillian Luthor had remade her.  Kara had been maybe… eighteen?  She couldn’t really remember but Ni had called her a child.

CADMUS had gotten word of an alien hiding out in Greenland and had sent Kara to intercept.  They had described the alien as hostile and had given her strict instructions to bring the alien back dead or alive.

Kara had hunted Ni for close on two weeks before she’d finally cornered her in a shallow cave in the middle of nowhere alone, tired, and bleeding. 

And defiant.

She’d cursed Kara out something awful, throwing snowballs at her and only serving to increase her rage.  Kara had taken it.  It wouldn’t have been her first kill and she knew it wouldn’t have been her last.  Her victims deserved their final say.  But then Fiora had jumped down from nowhere and tried to take Kara by surprise.  If Kara hadn’t been Kryptonian she probably would have.

As it was, she’d simply sidestepped the neatly executed attack and activated her heat vision.  She’d felt the familiar regret fall upon her at the life she was about to take, but being dead was better than being at CADMUS in her book.  And then Wren had run out—one of Fiora’s daughters— her little wolf pup body diving in front of her mother and taking the brunt of the 5 second blast Kara had released.  She’d been unable to stop in time to not injure the pup at all but had managed to redirect it enough that it only hit her back paw.

She’d been frozen until Champ had attacked her leg, teeth digging uselessly into her skin as he tried to drag her away from his family. 

_“Report K-2S0.  What is your status?”_

She’d frozen at the sound of the voice in her ear and then frowned.

…they should know.

…Kara was wearing a bodycam.

And a lightbulb had gone off in her head.  She’d grabbed Champ, hands closing over his snout and pinching just so behind his neck.  He’d gone slack in an instant.

“I’m closing in on the target Ma’am.  I still have its tracks.”

The other occupants of the cave all looked at her like she was crazy but said nothing.

Lillian made an aggravated sound.  “ _Go faster, I’d liked this wrapped up by sunrise_.”

“Yes Ma’am.”

And Kara cut off her coms.  Her body cam wasn’t functioning up here.  There was no feed going back to CADMUS.  She need only break the stupid thing before going back to base and they wouldn’t know a damn thing. 

She looked at Ni.  “Can your kind create a second body?  You’re supposed to be like arthropods yes?  Can you molt?”

Ni had nodded slowly, looking first at Kara then at Fiera and her children. 

“Good.  I need you to do that.  I don’t want to kill you.  I just need a body.  I need you to attack me here.  Make it hurt.”  She pointed at her chest where her body cam was hidden.

An uncertain and scared look had wrippled through the alien’s body, mouths and ears appearing in odd plaxces, but she had nodded again and sent a bolt of white hot electricity surging towards Kara. 

And it _had_ hurt.

And it had fried all of her electronics.

She’d never been so happy.

Finally, Ni had closed her eyes in concentration and her body had jerked in a seemingly painful arc.  This had gone on for several minutes, little high-pitched whistles leaving the alien as her body continued to do a macabre impression of a marionette. 

Then Ni had crawled out of her old body, smaller and covered in a white film.  And shaking like a leaf from head to toe.

Kara had pulled her Fukumen from her head, and wrapped it around the ‘newborn’ alien, the long black cloth enough to cover Ni’s upper body.

The relief she felt enough to make her uncaring of the snow that was coming down on her head.

She didn’t have to do this.

She wouldn’t have to take a life.

CADMUS couldn’t _see_ her; for this brief moment she was free.

She’d directed them to a boat after that, the small schooner empty and in good condition, explaining who she was and dragging the bleeding corpse of Ni’s old body behind her.  It would be enough for CADMUS to study.  They probably wouldn’t think twice with the way it was cut open, Kara had ripped the skin further with her bare hands to make it look like she’d personally ripped the alien apart. 

Organs lost in transit were not her fault, it wasn’t part of her directive.

Ni and Fiora had been skeptical but for whatever reason, had decided to trust her.  The fact that Kara could probably kill them all without much effort probably also told them they shouldn’t get on her bad side.

The fact that she had tried to stop when Wren had popped up probably told them that she wasn’t a complete monster.

Also, as previously stated, Ni was more than a little eccentric.

She’d flown in front of them, pulling the boat behind her over to National City’s borders within the night and had set them up in the abandoned warehouse district.  There had been a massive accident there a few years ago that had killed over a hundred human workers.  Since then multiple companies had tried to lay claim to the land, but for one reason or another they had all been forced to close.  It was now considered cursed and had fallen to the wayside.  It was the perfect place to hide.  Homeless people and addicts tended to mind their own business, unless asked otherwise.  Kara doubted anyone would ask otherwise.

Besides this would only be temporary.

She had plans now.

CADMUS didn’t own her; not completely.  They couldn’t always see what she saw or hear what she heard.  They weren’t absolute. 

She could save people.

She would save people.

She’d made the oath that night and had slowly helped Ni and Fiora build the camp from nothing.  It had gotten a lot easier to manage once Bob had come on board, but they had already had fully flourishing crops and such before that.  Bob’s ability to create illusions helped them to stay hidden from humans.  Especially law enforcement.

But since humans couldn’t go in, that meant that every now and again, Ni would have to venture out.  She’d done so today, taking on the features of an Asian woman as she tutted at Kara’s story and hefted more crates into the pickup.

With Siobhan on the loose, Kara wouldn’t be able to go to the camp, but she could pretend to help the old nun load her supplies.

“Stop ‘tutting’ at me.  I’m not in the wrong here.”  She barely felt the weight of the crates and had to remember that a normal woman would find them difficult to move.

Ni’s acting skills were far superior as she struggled over to the truck with her own load.  “Just Alex is broken; you’re sending a pig to slaughter.”

Kara rolled her eyes at the dramatics.  “I am not sending her anywhere.  She found a lead, she didn’t tell me she found the lead, I just happened to overhear the conversation.  Why would I show up where I’m not wanted?  Or liked?” She added, unable to keep the bitterness from her voice.

A startled cry left her lips when Ni stopped in front of her abruptly.  There was no sympathy on the Krishar’s face and she seemed almost exasperated.

“You have lived with humans as your masters for years so I will forgive your ignorance and false disinterest.  The species is hardly the best role model for emotional expression.  But, just for clarity’s sake, Just Alex was _not_ trying to hurt you.  All she was trying to do was figure out how to stay whole with _you_ trying to steal her heart.”  The alien’s voice was imploring and her new features made Kara feel properly chastised.

“Yeah… well,” she fumbled, mortification making her want to be anywhere but here, shifting to hold the package in her arms.  “Some thief I turned out to be.”

Ni shook her head.  “You’re a lot for anyone to handle Kara.  You defy every rule of humanity; make’s people feel inadequate.  It’s no wonder she’s scared.  When someone is scared, you don’t leave them to die.  You protect them.  It’s who you are.  You saved _my_ life.”

Heat flooded her cheeks at the undeserved praise and she ducked her head to hide her embarrasment.  “I’m pretty sure you were the one who saved _mine._ You and Fiora… you guys gave me purpose.  Made me hope again.”

Ni smiled patiently, “then I am asking that you extend that kindness to your human.”

And they were back to that.

Kara scowled, head thunking on the wood of the crate as she sagged in defeat.

Fine.

Stupid better person nonsense.

She moved around Ni, ignoring the satisfied smile on the woman’s face, and continued on with her task.  She’d check on Alex at the stupid alien club.  Scotland Parker would be there tonight anyway and his fear of her should make any action she needed to take go smoothly.

 

* * *

 

Schmoozing with the bartender turned out to be very easy, it was a woman for once, and one who seemed very interested in Alex’s assets.  She served her beer after beer, and steadily Alex attracted a few more suitors.  Her eyes had scanned the whole club, using her dancing partners as covers, she easily spotted the room she would need to get into. 

The black glass was very unoriginal.

She’d been fake chugging shots all night, taking the alcohol into her mouth before grabbing the nearest person and slipping the liquid to them instead.  Everyone thought she was a ball of fun; Alex thought it was extremely gross on their parts.

Honestly!  She could have an STD for fucks sake!

Eventually though, her slutty fun party girl act paid off and a security guard came over to ask if she wanted to go up to VIP.  Of course, she did!

The walk up the top floor left her feeling jittery, she’d already scoped the entire place out, had planned 5 separate exit strategies, had double checked that her gun was where it was supposed to be.

She was as prepared as she was going to get.

The bouncer eyed her as she was led onto the top floor, taking in the skimpy black dress she’d squeezed into, and allowing her to pass.

What she saw was unsurprising, an ordinary white male sat in between two Asian looking women.  It was like a scene out of a very badly written action movie.

She smiled charmingly at the man, taking in the greased back hair and black v neck.  No hair grabs, vulnerable throat.

“Hello Beautiful, thank you for joining me.”  The smirk on the man’s face was downright lecherous and Alex had to fight to keep her bimbo smile in place.  He shooed the two women away, and Alex had to fight not to do a double take, there had been something about that woman’s neck…

“Yes, well… I was curious.”  She moved to sit down when the man gestured to the now open seat next to him.  Making sure her side pressed just slightly against his own, she turned to take in his profile; checking for any noticeable tattoos or other body markings.  “It’s not every day that I get invited to VIP after all.”

The man chuckled, turning towards her, eyes gleaming in the dark lit club.  “I find that hard to believe beautiful.”

Alex smiled, letting her eyes drop obviously to his lips before returning to his eyes.  “What’s your name?”

“Why?  You wanna know what name to scream later on?”

Gross.

Smile still in place, Alex peeked at him from beneath her lashes, running her index finger down the arm not positioned behind her.

“Maybe.”

His smile widened, and he brought the yellow drink up to her face.  “Try this.”

She scoffed.  “You first.”

“Smart woman.”  He said with a laugh, taking a generous sip from the glass and showing her his full and then empty mouth.

She hummed, still contemplating her next move.  She’d been clean for the better part of 3 months now…  she thought of Hank and Maggie and Felicity… of Jon. 

She could explain the situation later.  They’d understand.  Besides, one sip wasn’t going to hurt.

He smiled encouragingly, bringing the glass nearer to his face and she cupped his hand to stop the forward motion.  Gingerly she raised both his hand and the glass to her lips.

It tasted like a rum raisin milkshake.  She knew because her father had been particularly fond of those and had made them for her and Kara when he and Eliza had had guests over.  That happy memory combined with the delicious taste made her take another pull from the glass.  The hint of alcohol soothing her and making her feel calm almost instantly.

“Good girl.  You like?”  He trailed the back of his hand down her cheek and she sighed, leaning into the touch. 

That was nice.

“Mmhm.”  She agreed, eyes closing briefly before she remembered why she was here.  “What’s your name?”

He smiled.  “Scott.”

“Hm… ‘s a stupid name.”

He chuckled, his hand trailing down her arm now, landing on her hip and tugging her infinitesimally closer.  Close enough that Alex was able to smell his cologne and underlying sweat.  Gross.

She made a face and pulled away, pushing his hand from her waist.  “No tanks.”  She giggled.  “ ‘s not what I wanna say.  Tanks.”  Another giggle.  “Thhhanks.”

“You are very beautiful Alex.”

She snickered.  Was this guy for real?

“Who’re you?”

“I’m a businessman.  I administer to a certain… clientele.”

“Murder men?”  She asked, eyes crossing slightly as she tried to get a look at the glass he had set on the table.

“No.”  Scott’s hand dropped to her thigh, stroking slightly.  “I don’t sully myself with such affairs.  My clients are aliens.”

She giggled, she felt so floaty.  An Alien concierge.  Seriously?  She’d come all this way for an alien concierge.

“What about you Detective Danvers?  You kill anyone lately?”  His ‘charming’ smile was still in place as he persisted in his attempts to try to cop a feel.

Alex continued to smile lazily.  Idiot, she wasn’t a detective.  Warning bells were going off in her head, telling her to get up and get out, but she was too comfortable and the room had just stopped spinning.

“ ‘m not a Detective sir.  I am…”  She burst out into laughter, becoming louder when he offered her a puzzled smile.

“What are you sweet cheeks?”

“Sweet Cheeks?  Seriously?  What timeline did I travel back to?”

“The good one.”  Clearly Scott was starting to lose his patience, his face turning a nice shade of red.  “If you ain’t a detective what are you doing hanging around Maggie Sawyer?”

The warning bells were louder this time, and Alex actually had the wherewithal to draw her gun, strapped to the inside of her thigh and fully loaded.  The thug blinked at the weapon.

“How do you know Maggie Sawyer?”  She demanded, voice wobbly and slightly slurred.

Scott scoffed, grabbing the barrel of the gun and twisting it out of her grip.  Alex used the momentum from the pull to slam her forehead into his nose.

Geez!  Yep, the spinning was definitely back!  What an asshole!

He howled in pain as blood spurted from the wrecked appendage and then the sound of rustling clothes was heard as the goons around her all raised their weapons.  One of them even pumped his shotgun!  Idiot.  He’d literally just wasted a bullet for a show of bravado.

Scott stood, face livid in anger and wiping the blood from around his mouth.  Alex smirked, unable to help sinking back into the cushions.  She already knew what was coming next, trying and failing to brace herself when she saw him cock his arm back.  The brute was not a small man; this was going to hurt.

Except the blow never came.

“Hello Scott.”

Linda?

The blonde was standing off to the side dressed casually in jeans and a mint green jacket, arms behind her back and posture relaxed.  Her glasses glinted in the dim lighting, giving the illusion of mirrors.  Scott’s bodyguards were mysteriously absent.

Scott scowled, spitting blood at his feet and pointing a threatening finger at Linda.  “The hell are you doing here?”

“I heard things were getting physical.  Thought I’d try to talk some sense into you _before_ I called your mother this time.

“This bitch ain’t got nothing to do with you Zor—”

Whatever he had been about to say was abruptly cut off and Alex sat up, blinking in surprise.  Linda was holding her hand over Scott’s mouth… when she had just been on the other side of the room… What the hell had been in that drink?

The blonde looked _livid_ , her fingers pressing harshly into flesh as she regarded the man before her.  “Don’t talk about her again, do you understand?  I know your mothers Scotland Harper and I _will_ call them.”

Alex snickered.  _Scotland?_

Scotland scowled and wrenched his face away from Linda’s grasp.

“Then you keep your pet away from me!  I won’t be held responsible for what happens if she shows face here again.”  He commanded, stepping away from them and walking through the doors at the far side of the balcony.  Which was just as well, because it gave her the freedom to throw up.  All over Linda Taylor.

“I am so sorry.”  She pleaded, heart lodged in her throat and skull a gazillion times more than fuzzy.  Heh. Gazillion was such an odd word.  Was it a real word?  Was she a _word smith_?!

Linda’s face pinched in distaste but she was offering her a kind smile a second later. 

“It’s fine, it’s better you get that out of your system anyway.  What were you thinking drinking that stuff?”  The blonde pulled Alex’s right arm over her shoulder, supporting her weight easily as she stood and maneuvered them passed a pile of unconscious men.

Huh?  Alex must have been truly out of it.  She was such a badass, she thought with a smile.   Maggie was going to be so jealous when she told her she’d taken out 6 armed men while drunk off her ass… possibly drugged as well… definitely drugged.

“I can handle a little… some… my alcohol is handled.”  She concluded, focusing on where to place her feet.

Linda sighed, shouldering open a heavy looking door and leading Alex into the brisk night air.  “Maybe human alcohol, but that was an alien club Alex.  A seedy alien club.  What were you doing there?”

“Flowing a lead.”  That wasn’t right.

“Of course, you were.” The blonde conceded with a shake of her head.  “Where are your keys?”

“No.”

“No?” Linda asked, clearly puzzled as she paused at the end of the sidewalk, uncertain where to go next.

Alex smiled up at her dreamily.  Linda was so pretty, her soft blonde curls were pulled back in a loose ponytail, the wind flicking through the strands every so often and making Alex giggle.  So pretty.

And Alex wasn’t an idiot, she scowled as her mind started going through her options.  Linda wanted to take her home!  Linda was mad at her!

“But I’m sorry!”  The yell startled the blonde—enough so Alex was able to fish her keys from the bag at Linda’s side and throw them into the sewer conveniently placed below her feet.

She cackled.

Linda balked.

“Seriously?”  The blonde whispered, her brows furrowing in concentration as she fought to keep Alex upright.

As quickly as the humor had come, Alex suddenly felt ill, leaning heavily on the woman next to her and groaning pathetically.

“I don’t feel so good.”

“I’m sure you don’t.” Linda agreed.  She heaved a sigh, pulling more of Alex’s weight onto her and stepping closer to the curb.  “Taxi!”

The trip over to her apartment passed in flashes.

Alex remembered getting in a cab and promptly dropping her head into Linda’s lap, moaning the entire time.  The driver had shot her an aggravated look, but Linda had said something to him and they’d proceeded on their way.

She remembers almost falling down the stairs, and giggling hysterically at being airborne, however momentarily.  Linda had _not_ been pleased.

And she remembers dreaming.  The same dream.  It’s always the same.

Fields of Scotch Broom lay open under a bright summer sky.  She was on the cliffs, overlooking the ocean some ways behind their house.  It smelled of salt and something distinctly earthly.  The waves crashed smoothly on the beach, just a touch of foam on their tips.  If she got her board now, she could still catch some of the calmer waves; clear her mind.  And then she’d hear Kara’s laugh, loud and full of life, somewhere off in the distance.  She’d turn half expecting to see the effervescent young woman behind her but then she’d wake up. 

She always woke up. 

The next time she’d been aware of the world, Linda had been sitting on the floor next to her head while she was stretched out on something soft.  She squinted in confusion—a couch?  There was also a warm weight resting near her hip but she couldn’t for the life of her tell what it was.

She hadn’t had much more time to process it, because she was throwing up again.  One of Linda’s hands holding her hair back from her face and the other holding a trash can under her head.

Alex groaned, slumping back onto the couch as she peeked at the woman through slit eyes.  “ ‘m sorry.”

Linda offered her a sad smile, pushing the trash can away and hugging her knees to her chest.  Sitting like that—her entire body portraying exhausted affection—she reminded Alex strongly of Kara.  She felt tears prick her eyes, and quickly moved to wipe them away even though her hands felt clumsy in the endeavor.  Kara had always thought of Alex as super human, had thought she was a real-life hero.  Oh, how wrong she had been.  What would she think?  If she could see how low Alex had truly fallen?

“I know.”  Linda murmured, watching the slow breakdown before her, eyes sad.

“I’ll do better.”  She fisted her hands, pushing them harshly against her eyes to try to stem the river trying to escape.  Everything felt _wrong._ She wasn’t…  This wasn’t what she wanted. 

“I don’t need you to ‘do better’ Alex.”  Linda’s voice was soft, and Alex was grateful for it since her brain was hammering in her skull.  “I just want you to be ok.  I don’t want you hurt.”

Alex nodded, biting harshly into her lip.  She shouldn’t have taken that drink; she should have kept her stupid promise.  She’d put herself at risk, her mission at risk.  If Scott had been smarter, he could have followed her line of questioning and realized who she was.  He almost _had!_   She’d have been dead and ALFA might behave gotten tipped off.  She was such an idiot.

“I’ll try harder.”  Her voice sounded strained even to her own ears, and she choked back a sob as tears worked past her hands and down the sides of her face.  “I know you deserve better than this, I know that I’m a piece of shit right now—"

“Alex…”

“I didn’t mean what I said before… about not being your friend.  I’ve never known anyone like you.  I don’t deserve… I’ll get my shit together, I promise.  I’ll be better.”

Linda sighed, a tired sound that prompted Alex to look at her through blurry eyes.  The blonde’s attention was focused on the floor to ceiling windows across from them, one hand shoved in her hair and the other wrapped tightly around her legs.  Dressed like this, in a loose comfy looking grey hoodie over a black t-shirt and baggy pajama pants, Alex was fairly certain she’d never been more captivated in her life.

 

"I understand your frustration Alex… I do.  But I don't want to spend my life waiting for you to 'get your shit together'.” Alex’s breath caught in her throat as Linda paused, head tilting in bewilderment. 

 

"Humans are so odd.  You'll spend your life chasing this idea of perfection, whether it be in yourself or someone else.  You want to be perfect; you hold yourself to these insane standards and refuse to allow yourself happiness until you have achieved them.  That's like trying to train yourself for a marathon without stopping for water.  It's foolish and unnecessary.  Life isn't about slaving away by yourself to build your perfect life, or to rebuild your dream car… it's about finding the person who knows what tool to pass you before you need to ask.  Who you can trust to unscrew the oil cap while you pull the drain plug.  And even if they mess up sometimes, you don't get mad because at least they're still there.  Still helping you every step of the way.”  Linda shook her head, letting her arms circle her knees again as she looked first at the floor and then at Alex.  “And I understand if you don’t want that person to be me.  I do.  And, if that’s the case, then it’s okay…  But I’ve lived my entire life not getting to say the things I want to say; or do the things I want to do.  And life is short… so I’ll just say that I think… for me I think I want that person to be you.”  A blush stained the blonde’s cheeks at the halting admission and she ducked her head again, refusing to meet Alex’s eyes.  “I don’t need a forever, I would just really like a right now.”

 

Alex blinked sleepily, sure that if she wasn’t drugged this little speech would be sending her for the hills.

 

“Why are you telling me this?”  She asked, already feeling herself slipping back into oblivion.

 

“I just told you why.”  Linda said, hiding behind her hair and a shy smile.  “And I guess also because there’s a pretty good chance you won’t remember it in the morning.”

 

The other woman’s expression was downright mischievous and frankly annoying.

 

Alex scowled, no longer able to make out Linda’s face behind her closing eye lids. How dare she?! Her memory was damn impeccable.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "I've been waiting on a true love's kiss, and a prince I'm hoping come's with this." Alex got a kiss as a kiddo, no wonder she can't let it go. 
> 
> Also, 99% of the issues I've given/ will give Winn in IT are real life things that I have seen happen. Real requests that people put in. Me and my co-workers have an annual who has the best story contest and the hope of winning is what keeps us nice, kind and patient. But man, you really lose faith in humanity with some of the questions you get asked.
> 
> Alex is an ass yes BUT in her defense she didn't know Linda was there AND she feels like she's a constant disappointment. She really wants to be with Linda but being with her will disappoint Hank and she's just sick of being a fuck up. le sigh.
> 
> I love supportive Cat. I get some people's ire with the character but I genuinely didn't see her as abusive. Super uptight and in need of a massage but I aside from that Adam debacle I thought she was amazing. Balancing her sternness with her love of Kara is hard.
> 
> And then we see what the heck happened with Kara; meeting Ni and Fiora and starting the refugee camp. The idea is that Lillian was able to control her for short periods because of her programming and... things that I don't think I revealed yet. BUT as long as Kara never broke her objectives, she was able to wiggle around and make things happen. Lillian asked for a body and she brought her one. Lillian never asked her to not set up a hideaway for the aliens, so she was able to. Obviously she can't save everyone of her targets but she can save some of them and I think it's amazing that she does.
> 
> And Kara saved Alex! Yay! Romance must come after this right?
> 
> Right?
> 
> Anybody?


	10. Hope if Everybody Runs, You Choose to Stay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Recap:
> 
> So way back in the day Alex introduced Kara to the game of hide and seek not knowing that on Krypton, to the winner go the spoils. Or in this case a kiss. First kisses are so romantical.
> 
> What isn't romantic is harassing the IT team, which Alex did when she cut James' internet wire. Winn had to come fix it and just when it seemed things were looking up on their friendship, Alex put her foot in her mouth. To be fair she was trying to appease Hank, but she unfortunately blabbed that she didn't like Linda... in front of Linda.
> 
> Not so good.
> 
> Kara our dear, sweet bean was obviously upset by this development and had to get pep talks from Cat and Ni before she decided to confront Alex.
> 
> Alex was busy following a lead at a club, where she got into some trouble. Kara rescued her, and got her home and they had a conversation that Alex is going to have some trouble remembering.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay guys, if I had planned this better you would have had a Mother's day treat. As it is, I'm going through some personal things that's making me feel a bit lackluster. It's like when normal people get colds; I get mild depression. Anywho, here is the long awaited chapter, unbeta'd so all mistakes are my own. I own nothing but the plot idea and the original characters.
> 
> Song Title is from: I Lived- One Republic. Great song, 10/10 would recommend.

 

 

_****_

Hope if Everybody Runs, You  
Choose to Stay

**_Sometime in Early 2009_ **

_Alex entered the house slowly, making sure that her movements could be heard, but not alarming.  Toeing off her shoes, she dropped her backpack on a kitchen chair and looked around at the mess her mother had created._

_She tried futilely to fight the feelings of impatience and irritation that arose in her; the ones that always mixed with the worry and shame._

_It wasn’t Eliza’s fault.  Not really.  She had experienced something traumatic (so had Alex), and she couldn’t be held responsible for breaking down.  Losing your husband was way harder than losing your best friend/girlfriend.  Alex knew that._

_Logically it made sense that her mother was having a hard time._

_Emotionally, she didn’t care._

_Eliza breaking down and basically becoming a drug addict overnight had meant that Alex had had to be strong._

_Alex who had lost just as much as her mother._

_It brought up intense feelings of anger and resentment that Alex tried hard to quell._

_She grabbed a paper towel and wiped up 2 egg yolks that had been left on the counter, dumping the mess in the trash as she cleaned up Eliza’s attempt at breakfast._

_She hadn’t always been successful in the quelling._

_Sighing, she moved to clean up the rest of the kitchen and the house, as always wondering why Eliza had even bothered.  Alex woke up an hour early every day to make breakfast and lunch for her mother so that this didn’t happen.  Eliza still forgot and did it anyway._

_It was such bullshit._

_Once, everything was put away and wiped down, she started on dinner; stuffing two chicken breasts and placing them in the oven in a baking dish with marinara sauce._

_She could start the rice and vegetables a little later, it was best if she went and checked on Eliza first.  The woman tended to have mood swings if she wasn’t given enough time to wake up._

_She picked up stray articles of clothing as she made her way up the stairs, dumping her load on her bed before entering her parents room down the hall.  Eliza was passed out on her mattress, the covers hanging off the end of the bed and a glass of water tipped over next to her dangling hand._

_A smattering of pill bottles was strewn across her bedside table and the floor.  Another mess to clean._

_Alex sighed again and got to work._

_Once everything was in order again, she knelt next to her mother’s head, keeping a safe enough distance that if Eliza lashed out she could dodge the blow._

_Her mother had never hit her on purpose, but she was always a bit aggravated when she was forced from her slumber._

_“Mom.”  Alex said softly, hand resting lightly on her mother’s shoulder and just barely shaking her.  “Mom, it’s me Alex.  Wake up please.”_

_Eliza frowned, brows furrowing as she dug her face into the sheets below her._

_“Mom, it’s Alex.” Alex tried again, putting the tiniest bit more pressure on her mom’s shoulder.  “Wake up.  It’s almost time for dinner.”_

_Eliza’s hand shoved hard against her chest, knocking Alex back on her ass and spilling an unseen bottle of water that Eliza had hidden under her bed.  The liquid seeped quickly into Alex’s jeans and she felt the familiar anger start to simmer in her belly._

_“Alex!” Eliza, rolled over on her back, hands on her face as she tried to wake herself up.  “Oh sweetie, I’m so sorry.  I didn’t know it was you.”_

_Of course, she didn’t.  She never did.  Even though Alex had stated her identity twice._

_“It’s fine mom.  It was an accident.”  It wasn’t fine.  Alex was so tired of this.  “Why don’t you go cleanup for dinner and I’ll wipe this up.”_

_Eliza looked up at her from bloodshot eyes, the drugs causing slight tearing that always made Eliza look so sad._

_“Ok. Thank you, sweetie.  You’re so good to me.”  She smiled softly and struggled out of her bed, face pinching in pain every so often.  Another side effect of the drugs.  Phantom pains her doctor said._

_Alex was pretty sure it was actually from muscular dystrophy.  Her mother had barely left her bed since her dad had been declared dead.  Hadn’t left the house, except to see that idiot shrink, since he disappeared._

_The fact that her body was shutting down was a simple result of her not using it and stuffing it full of toxic chemicals._

_Once her mom was out of the room, Alex’s eyes moved back to the pill bottles.  She could dump them.  Force her mom to be a human again._

_But she’d yell, and Alex knew she couldn’t handle that right now…_

_Her hand hovered over her mom’s anti-depressants._

_She couldn’t handle anything right now._

 

~*~

Alex awoke to the sound of voices and the smell of cooked bananas.  She groaned, hands reaching up to clutch at her pounding skull.  

“Oh, well look who decided to join us.”

Her eyes shot open, and she bolted upright hissing in pain as her body protested the sudden movement.  Still, she pushed past her discomfort to squint incredulously in the direction the voice had come from.

She must be super hung over.

That was the only explanation.

No way was this happening.

What. The. Fuck.

Linda gave her a small smile and wave from where she was seated at the bar island, dressed in Alex’s old MIT hoodie zipped up to mid chest, revealing a black t-shirt underneath.  A pair of old sweatpants that Alex had stolen from Felicity (who had stolen them from Oliver) covered her lower half.  Her feet were bare.

While Alex was confused about her presence and her ensemble, that wasn’t what had caused her such distress.  

No what was causing her heart to race and her stomach to churn was one Eliza Danvers, standing at her counter and plating a stack of pancakes.  The older blonde was smiling as she turned and set the plate in front of Linda.

“There we are sweetheart; would you like some syrup?”

Linda smiled sweetly.  “Yes please, Eliza.  These look delicious.”  She picked up her fork eagerly as if to prove her words.

The fuck?

Sweetheart?

Eliza?

Since when was it ok for Linda to call her mom by her first name?  Eliza didn’t let anyone call her by her first name.  It was always Dr. Danvers.

And her mom didn’t call anyone sweetheart either!

She was dreaming.  This was just a hallucination or something.

Linda hummed happily around her mouthful of food, eagerly spearing another piece of pancake for her next bite.

“Honestly Alexandra are you just going to laze about all day?  Go get cleaned up and then come get your breakfast.  You look terrible!”

Still blinking in bewilderment, Alex followed the instructions given to her.  She rose carefully, not eager to upset her aching body again, and made her way to her bathroom.

She had somehow changed herself into a hideous nightgown.  The only nightgown she owned.  It had been a gift from her grandmother otherwise she would have torched the damn thing years ago.  Instead she’d shoved it in the back of her closet to die alone and unloved.  How it had clawed its way to the surface she may never know.

What the hell had happened last night?

She remembered going to the club.  Remembered that asshole greaser mobster wannabe… there was a nice bruise on her forehead, so she probably got into some sort of fight.

She exhaled heavily as she leaned over her sink, closing her eyes and resting her hands on either side of the basin.  She could do this.  She was trained to do this.

She had been in a fight.  She remembered she’d pulled her gun.  And then Linda was there somehow.

Brain juices finally flowing, she washed her hands and brushed her teeth, small snippets coming back in flashes that she was able to slowly start piecing together.

Her ears tuned back into the conversation happening in her kitchen as she left the bathroom, causing her to hasten her steps to run interference.

“… you should try a nice hot bath with some lavender essential oils.  The scent is known to relieve stress and sooth anxieties.  It should help with your neck tension.”

“You think so?”  Linda looked down at her shoulders, hands in front of her as she tried to gauge what Eliza was seeing.  “I try to do stretches… yoga… it always comes back.”

“Well that might be from your job dear.  No offense, but if Alex’s schedule is anything to go by that woman works long hours!”

“Mom!”  Alex glanced nervously at Linda, easing into the chair next to the blonde.  “What are you doing?”

Eliza smiled kindly at her, patting her hand and moving back towards the opposite counter.  “Don’t worry honey I made you some too.”  She returned with another stack of pancakes and moved the butter and syrup over to Alex.  She motioned towards the pitcher of water in the middle of the table.  “Eat up, and don’t forget to drink your water—you need to rehydrate.  Linda,” she started again, “when’s the last time you went for a spa treatment?  Maybe a massage?  I was going to go tomorrow afternoon if your available—”

“MOM!”  Alex’s cheeks were flushed a nice red at this point and she clenched her hands in her lap as she pleaded.  “ _Please_ stop.  She doesn’t wanna go with you.  That’s so weird.”

“It’s fine actually.  It sounds like fun.”  Linda beamed at her mother and Eliza returned it, laughing lightly as she collected Linda’s plate.

Alex was pretty sure she was in the Twilight zone.

“What are you even doing here?”

“Honestly Alexandra, it’s almost Christmas!  Did you expect me to spend the holiday _alone?  Again?_ ”  The question was asked with an arched brow, Eliza’s hand on her hip just daring Alex to say something untoward.

Alex was smarter than that.

“No.” She grumbled, pulling her water towards herself and taking a long drink.  Eliza glared at her for a few more seconds, obviously anticipating more of a fight.  When none was forthcoming she turned eager eyes back to an amused Linda.  “May I speak to you?”  Alex interrupted, turning to Linda and looking pointedly out at her balcony.  “Alone?”

The smile slipped from Linda’s face, and she bit her lip as she gave a slow nod and rose to her feet.

Alex gave what she hoped was an encouraging smile to her glaring mother and followed after her.

“What are you doing?” She hissed as soon as she had closed the door behind them.  The cold air bit into her skin and she wished she’d taken the chance to change.  At the time all she’d been able to think about was getting back out to the “odd couple” before true disaster struck.

“I don’t…”  Linda fidgeted in front of her, shifting her weight between her feet.  Her bare feet.  Alex felt like such an ass.  “I mean I know you said that you didn’t like me but—”

“No. Stop.  That’s dumb.  Of course, I like you; I meant what are you doing agreeing to go out with my mom?  That’s weird.  You don’t even _know_ each other—”

“She _invited_ me—”

“Yeah cause she’s a weirdo!  Look, just… get your massage another day ok?  You don’t have to pander to the ‘old lady’.  There’s nothing wrong with your neck.” 

Linda’s lips turned down, her arms raising to hug her abdomen as she rocked on her heels and turned her head away from Alex.

Shit.  

Alex swiped a hand over her face.  “Seriously?”  She asked, flinging her arm out incredulously.  “You act like you’ve never gotten a stupid massage before.”  Linda said nothing, but her eyes were doing weird things to Alex’s stomach and her cheeks were red.  And now Alex felt like a true piece of shit; a feeling mimicked by her massive hangover.  “You’ve never gotten a massage before.”  She stated, shaking her head slightly so as not to upset her pounding skull.

Linda shrugged, arms tightening around herself.  “It was stupid anyway.  I’m sorry for intruding.”  And then she was moving towards the door, trying to make her escape.  

Except Alex couldn’t just let her leave.  She’d wanted to talk to the blonde for _days_ and now she’d had her opportunity and she’d screwed it up royally.

“I’m sorry.”  She said hastily, stepping in front of the door and holding up her hands imploringly.

Linda refused to meet her eyes, staring instead at the ground as she shook her head.  “Yeah, so you said.”

Vague memories of an apology started to filter back into Alex’s brain.  She couldn’t help the frustrated growl that escaped her as her own words replayed through her head.  She pulled her hands roughly through her hair, trying to focus passed the queasy feeling in her stomach and pounding skull.  “It’s true.  I meant what I said.  I _am_ sorry.  And what I just said… that wasn’t… I don’t want you to leave.  And I don’t _not_ like you Linda.”  She paused, tugged at her hair again, and tried to find the right words to say.  “It’s just… my mom isn’t… it’s just _weird!_ Waking up to your mom and your cru—person.  Your person.  You are my people, my peeps.”  She stuttered out.

She was going to die from embarrassment.  This was _terrible!_ She blamed the alcohol!  She was _never_ drinking again.  Ever.

Except… now at least Linda was looking at her.  In confusion, but still looking at her!

“Why is that weird?”  Linda asked, eyes inquisitive and face no longer as sad.

“Oh, come on that’s—your telling me you’d be ok with your mom talking to your friends alone?  You wouldn’t be worried she’d embarrass you?”

“My mother would have liked you.”  Linda stated, eyes thoughtful.  “I do not remember everything about her, but I do know that she was a sucker for misfits.”

Alex scowled.  “I am _not_ a misfit!”

“Of course not.”

The smile on Linda’s face was annoying… and beautiful.  Alex had _missed_ her.  Had missed _this._

She pursed her lips to the side, forgetting the cold for a second as she settled into the moment.  “I _am_ sorry.  Those things I said… I didn’t mean them.  I was just upset.  My boss… he said some things and it made me a little crazy.  But that’s no excuse for how I treated you.  You deserve better than that.  I _know_ you deserve better than that.  If you give me another chance… Linda I swear it won’t happen again.  I… miss you.”

And Alex had thought she’d seen the blonde smile before, had thought she’d _known_ how beautiful Linda Taylor could be.  But she had known nothing.  

“You really meant that.”  Linda said, hand reaching out to rest lightly over Alex’s heart.  Her girl’s face lit up like Christmas, eye’s bright and happy and crinkling adorably at the corners.  The happy flush that coated her skin was stunning and Alex wanted to do everything in her power to make this smile happen every day.  To see how far down that flush went…

Fuck.

She really needed to get a hold of herself.

And also, not freeze to death.  Not freezing to death sounded really good right now.  

Of course, that thought brought her back to her ridiculous attire… and to Linda’s.

“Not that I’m complaining but why are you wearing my clothes?  And why are you here?  What happened?”  Alex pulled the door behind her open, stepping back into her apartment and pulling Linda in after her.  Aftercall, now that the awkward conversation was over, she was over freezing her ass off.  And she was more than a little concerned for Linda’s feet.

Linda frowned slightly, plucking at the sleeve of the hoodie she was wearing before unzipping it and pulling it off.

“No, I said I don’t mind.”  Alex protested, before falling silent as Linda fit the sweater over her shoulders.  Alex almost swooned into the blanket of warmth that created— Linda’s scent an intoxication all its own— but steeled herself against it.  She didn’t want to be _that_ person.

“I’m not completely sure of what happened truthfully.  I know you were at a bar, and you got into a fight with the owner.  Luckily, I know his parents, so I was able to convince him to let you go.  You were already drunk at that point, so I decided to take you home.”

Alex nodded thoughtfully, looking over at her mother who was sitting on the opposite side of her bar island sipping from a mug and reading a magazine.

“Ok… and then you… what?  Decided to make sure I didn’t die?”

Linda smiled softly, shifting uncomfortably again as she glanced around the room.  

“No.  Not exactly.  I mean, that seems like the smart thing _now_ but… well I couldn’t really go home after I lost my keys.”

Alex tried to quell the disbelief that came with that statement.  Unfortunately, she’d been in this situation countless times, where a girl said she lost her keys… her phone… her cousin.  The circumstances were always the same; some girl wanting more than what Alex did.  Trying to use every resource available to convince her that they could be ‘great’ together.  Alex had never been interested.  

She was interested now… but she still wasn’t in the mood to play any games.

“You lost your keys?” Her voice was deadpan as she resumed her seat at the island, taking a sip from the glass of water her mother pushed towards her and glancing at Linda’s still standing form.

“No… not exactly.”  The blonde moved towards the table, a small smile on her face and eyes on Alex’s mother as Eliza gestured for her to resume her seat.  “You threw them down the sewer.  Last night.  Right before I managed to get a cab to take you home.”

The memory came to her at the same time as the words.

Fuck.

Double Fuck.

“Linda,” She started, face hot in embarrassment.  “I am _so_ sorry.  I swear I didn’t mean—”

“It’s ok!” The blonde interrupted, face the epitome of happiness as she started in on a new stack of pancakes and seemingly unconcerned that Alex had thrown out her _keys_.  “I have a spare set at work.  It’s fine.  Besides, I think you were trying to throw out _your_ keys anyway.”

Alex shook her head, pressing her hands to her face to try to alleviate her mortification.  The whole incident replaying in her head only making her feel that much worse.  Blood rushed to her skull and the pounding she felt before increased to a dull roar.  “I am so sorry Linda.  Really.  I just remember thinking I didn’t want you to leave.  I wasn’t trying to… I don’t know, trap you?”

Alex shrugged helplessly at the blonde, choosing to ignore her mother’s tut but accept the painkillers Eliza slipped into her hand.

“Well you did Alexandra and I taught you better than that.”  The woman’s tone was critical.  Always critical, and Alex fought the frown that was trying to stretch across her face.  Eliza waited for her to swallow down the pills before turning back to Linda.  “Thank you so much for taking care of Alex, dear.  I know she can be a bit of a handful.”

Linda smiled, cheeks puffed out with food as she considered Eliza’s words.  “It was no problem Eliza.  Alex has been a really good friend, I couldn’t just leave her.”

Alex felt terrible.  “I really did think they were my keys Linda.  I would _never_ have done that if I’d known they were yours.”

Linda offered an amused smile in her direction.  “Do you even own a bag Alex?”

The protest died on her lips.  Because, ok _fine._ She did not own a purse or whatever.  Well, maybe she did.  She was pretty sure her mother had purchased a few.  They’d died in the back of her closet somewhere.  Or she’d re-gifted them.  The closest thing she had to a shoulder bag was her long-coveted leather messenger bag.  Maggie had been devastated.  Something about killing her ‘friends’.

Handbags were for sissies.

She chose instead to grumble under her breath about rude house guests, eat her breakfast, and try to surreptitiously make sure there was nothing untoward on display.

Mouth now stuffed with pancakes, she almost choked on her food when she noticed the wall leading to her bedroom.  It used to be blank, and it was now _covered_ in reports, pictures, snapshots, and string.  Like in Miss Congeniality when… Miss congeniality.  _Linda._

“What did you do?” She hissed, standing and running over to rip down the stupid layout.  Or at least that had been her intention.  Sudden movements were _not_ ok right now.  “Ugh, what did _I_ do?  What was in that drink?”  She groaned from her new position on the floor, rolling fully to her back and lifting her legs so they bent at the knee.  Eliza tusked from somewhere above her, and Alex raised her hands to her eyes to try to block her mother out.

“It was an alien beverage but I’m not sure what was in it.  I tend not to drink things I wouldn’t find on my own world.”  Linda’s reply came from around a mouth of food and Alex expected to hear her mother’s reprimand.  It never came.

“That’s very wise dear, I tried to teach that to Alex but…”  Eliza’s voice trailed off in disappointment.

This was seriously ridiculous.  

And why the hell did her floors smell like lemon?

“Seriously?! What the hell is going on here?” She lowered her hands, gingerly raising her body to send a sharp—but caring (totally caring)—look at Linda.  “Did you clean my apartment?”

“Yes.”  The blonde answered unperturbed, eyes darting to Alex’s forgotten plate and hands clasped in her lap.

OK. 

“Did you go through my case files?  And then pin them up like a rookie detective?” Alex prodded.

Linda glanced over at the wall, and then at Eliza and then to her lap.  “FBI Agent Gracie Hart used such implementations in her case and she was able to solve it without difficulty.”  She said defensively, fingers flexing, and brows furrowed in annoyance.  The expression seemed familiar to Alex but Linda’s next words, murmured more quietly, didn’t allow her to dwell on it.  “I thought—I wanted to help.  It… it looked like you needed help.”

Annoyance flared in Alex and she fought down the scowl, trying to retain her patience.

“I can solve my own cases Linda.”

“Alex!” 

Alex chose to ignore her mother’s scolding for a second, intent on figuring out the other woman in the room.  Her being a better person did not mean she wanted to be treated like an invalid.  She could clean her own place, she could do her own grunt work.

“That’s not—I didn’t.”  The blonde clenched her jaw, twisting her fingers and staring at a spot past Alex’s head.  “You tend to hurt yourself when you’re overwhelmed.  And I know you’re fighting with Winn so I… I just wanted to help.  I do not like it when you are hurt.”

And fucking hell, was she an asshole.

Eliza made a noise in the back of her throat, circling the bar and coming to rest her hands-on Linda’s shoulders.  “You did help sweetie.  Alex just doesn’t know how to _accept_ help.  That is regrettably my fault and I apologize.  You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Aside from going through confidential materials—” two sets of eyes turned to look at her and she quickly (but carefully) raised herself to her feet.  “But that’s beside the point… thank you for trying to help.  And cleaning my apartment.”  Eliza glared.  “and um, I guess organizing my files?”  She asked skeptically, gently pushing her plate towards Linda before moving towards the wall in question.

It was in complete disarray, assets placed next to each other in seemingly random positions.  She sighed internally already trying to remember how she had had everything catalogued.

“You were looking at it wrong.”  Linda’s voice at her elbow, almost startled her.  Almost.  “You were looking at their socioeconomic status: jobs, relationships, education.  But Winn said that you never really know someone until you know what’s in their head.  What’s their favorite book?”

Alex arched a brow, throwing a dubious look at the other woman.  “You sorted them based on their literary pursuits?”

Linda smiled, Alex’s plate in her hand and mouth once again full of pancakes.  “Of course, not silly.  There’s no way I’d be able to find that out in one night.  Most people probably have tons of favorite books.  I think I’m more like you though, the Codex Alera has been a hard series to topple.”

Alex’s heart stuttered a little at the admission, a warm feeling creeping in her belly.  She opened her mouth—intent on knowing _exactly_ what Linda thought of the novels—when Eliza moved over to them, her hand coming to rest on Linda’s back.

“Why don’t you tell Alex what you told me dear?”

Another soft smile from Linda, before she started gesturing at the wall with syrup spattered hands.  Alex had to fight not to grab them, her neat freak tendencies kicking into overdrive at the possible repercussions.

“Basically, I was afraid you would sneak off and injure yourself last night so I stayed up and did some… organizing.  And some research.  All the people in your victim file had something in common; they were all huge nerds.  Of course, that shouldn’t be enough to get murdered over; I’d be very upset if someone were to hurt Winn because of his intellect, but when I spoke to him—”

“Whoa, you talked to Winn?”

“Yes.”  Linda sent her a look that said she was questioning _Alex’s_ intellect.  “I needed to know why someone would murder one of “his people”.  He explained that sometimes these ‘hackers’ can uncover something they weren’t meant to see; or maybe they cyber bullied the wrong person; perhaps they were the ones being bullied or assaulted and spoke out.  Multiple reasons.  So, I did some more digging and I asked Joseph’s mom—”

“Joseph?” Alex questioned, voice bordering on confused impatience.  Another _look_ from Linda had her caving.  “I apologize, please continue.”

“Yes, Joseph Nicarago.  One of your victims.  His mom said he was a good kid, had friends, was getting his certifications.  He was trying to buy back his dad’s shop.  Didn’t really fit the ‘deserved to die’ description.  I asked to speak to his friends and she told me that they were probably in their homes playing a game called Call of Duty.  That’s—”

“I know what Call of Duty is Linda, what does it have to do with this?”

“They are all playing it.  All of your victims.”

“Together?” Alex asked, eyes looking back to the wall in a new light.

“No, not together.  At least not that I could see, but then again, I am unfamiliar with the game.  Winn seems to think that it might be more of them meeting a common killer than them actually knowing each other.  He said he’d have a name for you by this afternoon.”

It made sense.  Online gameplay was full of empty threats, racial slurs, and extreme vulgarity; the users having decided long ago that they need not censor themselves when they had little risk of being reported—getting caught.  It was the perfect place to hide.  

Linda’s muffled squeak brought her out of the kiss she had just planted on the blonde’s lips and she beamed.  “Linda Taylor you are a genius.  I need to go.”

She moved quickly towards her bedroom, wrestling herself into real clothes and running simulations through her head.  This was perfect.  This was a start.

She stumbled back out into her living room, hopping around while trying to put on her left boot.  Eliza looked on disapprovingly, arms folded in front of her as she blocked Alex’s way out.

“I know I raised you better than that Alexandra.”  Eliza said, voice impatient.

Alex frowned in confusion, before understanding dawned on her and she glanced back at Linda, boot finally on and secured.

The blonde was still where she had left her, looking slightly dazed, cheeks red and body stiff as a board.  Internally Alex smirked.

She hadn’t exactly _meant_ to kiss Linda, but she definitely wasn’t complaining about it either.  She just wished she hadn’t done it in front of her mother.  While she hadn’t gone out of her way to hide her sexuality from Eliza, she hadn’t exactly told her either.  Every time the subject was brought up, Eliza would find some loophole to make it so that her daughter was still the perfect little girl she had imagined.  Even when Alex had brought past flings around, or when Eliza had visited unannounced, she had simply asked Alex if her ‘roommate’ would like to join them for dinner.  

Most days Alex had been able to laugh about it.  Sometimes, it had led her straight to a bottle of Johnnie Walker.

She knew there would come a day when she would have to talk it over with her mother, but today… today was definitely not that day.  And there was no way in _hell_ she was leaving her alone with Linda.  Absolutely not.

Walking back towards the blonde, Alex spotted Linda’s pants on the armchair and grabbed them.

“You need to get changed too.  We need to be somewhere.  Before that asshole decides to do something stupid.”  She shoved Linda in the direction of her bedroom, closing her in the room despite the sound of protest she had made.

“Alexandra!”

Huffing impatiently Alex turned back to her mom, barely able to keep from stomping her foot.  “I am almost thirty years old mom!  I think I’ve reached an age where I can curse!”

“Not around me young lady!  And you _will_ treat Linda better than that!”  Eliza had barely even raised her voice, but Alex felt the familiar guilt and shame settle in her stomach as she had when she had stolen the neighbor’s cat for Kara.

She crossed her arms petulantly, fighting the scowl on her lips.  “Like how?”  She asked.

She’d meant what she said.  She did want to be better.  She just didn’t have the _how_ part down yet.

Eliza softened immediately, stepping toward her daughter and dragging her into a tight hug.

“Like maybe asking _her_ what she would like to do.  Properly thanking her for helping you last night, and for what she discovered about your case.  Taking her feelings and thoughts into consideration; as something outside of the realm where it affects _you._ ”

Alex frowned, considering.  She pressed her forehead into Eliza’s neck, allowing herself to relax in her mother’s hold.

The first few things were easily doable; even she wasn’t such an asshole as to not realize that Linda deserved her thanks and more.  But the last thing…

That was something Alex had always struggled with.

She didn’t try to be narcissistic, she honestly tried very hard not be a self-centered piece of shit.  Unfortunately, her brain seemed to be wired incorrectly.  In the more trying situations of life, she’d only ever been able to relate to anyone else’s emotions if she had experienced that emotion herself.  She’d been busy for most of her life learning _facts_ and science—not emotions.  Formulating an emotional response to most things outside of chaos and pain was foreign to her.   And even when she did, it was questionable of whether that response would be what her audience deemed as correct.

It wasn’t that she didn’t _want_ to take other people’s thoughts and emotions into consideration.  It was just that oftentimes, she just _didn’t get it_.  For example, the urge people had to cry at Disney movies?  Alex could completely relate, Bambi still sent her into bawling. 

But the distrust people inherently felt for their significant others?  The snooping through phones and social media posts like it was normal?  That Alex was lost on.  Why date someone if you couldn’t trust them?  That had gotten her laughed at more than once.

Human social cues and emotional constructs were oftentimes foreign to her, as she had spent most of her time with her head in her books.  Learning how to interact with her piers had not been a priority. 

She’d gone through a stint where she’d pointed this out and had been labeled an asshole.

So, she’d kept her mouth shut, allowing people to spew their emotional diarrhea in her ear and offering a simple nod in response.  

They’d labeled her an asshole again.

Even when she’d tried ‘understanding’, she was often _wrong_ and so was labeled an asshole.

Alex had gotten very comfortable with the term.

Trying again with Linda seemed like a surefire way to lose her.  

Not trying again with Linda was definitely a surefire way to lose her.

“What was that sweetie?”  Eliza asked, pulling away and cupping Alex’s face in her hands.

“She won’t like me anymore if I do it wrong.”  She mumbled again, avoiding the clear blue eyes that had a way of peering into her soul.

Eliza exhaled, thumbs rubbing at Alex’s cheekbones.  “I don’t think that’s true.  I think people just need to see you _try_ sweetheart.  They think you don’t give any effort, even though I know you do.”  She paused, pressing a sweet kiss to her daughter’s forehead before sweeping her up in her arms once again.  “Besides, I don’t think Linda is like those idiots you used to hang out with.  She’s a good girl Alex.”

Alex snorted, her own arms coming up to press into Eliza’s shoulders.  She opened her mouth to respond, but Linda chose that moment to step out her room.  Linda had put on the pants that Alex had shoved at her but had opted to keep on Alex’s shirt and had also reclaimed the hoodie she had stolen earlier.  

Alex felt her mouth dry out slightly at the sight of Linda in her clothes, an almost possessive urge nearly consuming her.  Idly she wondered about _why_ the woman had chosen to wear her clothing in the first place… but then an image of her puking on the blonde surfaced and she decided she’d embarrassed herself enough for one day.

Eliza sighed, smiling as she pushed Alex towards the other girl.  “Go on and solve your crimes, I’ll be here when you get back.”

~*~

Kara glanced around at the bar Alex had pulled her into.  It was still early, barely noon, and Alex had insisted on coming here.  In all the information given to her by CADMUS, Kara had learned that going to a bar this early was severely frowned upon.  And, in some places, also considered illegal.

Yet here they were, strolling into the dimly lit space, Alex’s hand gripping hers tightly as if afraid she’d lose her if she let go.

Kara wasn’t sure anymore if it was more of a physical loss, or an emotional one that scared Alex.  She hadn’t meant to overhear the conversation between mother and daughter, but sometimes her abilities got the best of her.

Hearing Alex confess that she didn’t think Kara would like her anymore if she messed up in their interactions had caused something in her chest to hurt.  It confused her.  

She’d never… Alex was a completely new experience for her.  Everything was sharp and loud, and it made things _hurt…_ but then Alex would smile, or she’d touch her or bite her lip, and everything would just… shift.

Like a piece of her that was being stretched to its limit was being gently pushed back into place.  It was scary.  She was scared.  Alex _terrified_ her.

But she never wanted Alex afraid of her.

Never wanted to be someone who Alex had reason to fear.

“We’re just stopping in here really quickly ok?  And then I’ll take you to Catco for your keys.”  Alex was saying, pulling her to the bar and noisily slapping down on a little metal bell on the counter.  “Are you hungry by any chance?”

Kara blushed at the question, pulling at the sleeves of the hoodie she was wearing.  Was Alex upset that she was eating so much?  Lillian wouldn’t have approved.  Although Kara could last much longer than a human without eating, the feeling she got when she didn’t eat was extremely uncomfortable.  It was a sensation she had gotten well acquainted with at CADMUS and a feeling that was starting to abate now that she had Alex and even Cat Grant in her life.

“Hey,” Alex said, interrupting her thoughts.  “Whatever asshole bullied you for eating, forget about them ok?  They don’t matter.  You do.  From now on, if you’re hungry you let me know and I’ll make sure to grab you something alright?”

“Alright.”  Kara confirmed, slightly breathless at the intensity of Alex’s stare.

In this lighting Alex’s hair seemed more brown than her usual red; her eyes darker than their normal hazel.  Everything about her was more subdued.

But she had an air of mischief about her.

And there was that shift again.  There was something wrong with her.  What she was experiencing, wanting Alex more than she wanted to follow orders, was not allowed; she should report her changes at her next check in.  She should probably go in earlier just in case.  She didn’t know what would happen if her directives were manipulated.

Kara sighed, taking a seat and staring at the woman’s profile.  She was beautiful; a true testament to her species.  But she’d hurt her.  Even if she hadn’t meant what she’d said, she had still caused Kara pain.

Her only real solace was that it hadn’t been intentional.  Whether CADMUS had meant to hurt or not, there had never been any remorse on their end for her agony.  They’d simply written down their results and gone at it from another angle.

Alex wasn’t like that.

Alex _had_ been sorry.  She had heard it in the way the agent’s heart had pattered away in her chest; the way she’d struggled with her words.

And she knew, with unequivocal certainty, that Alex would do everything in her power to never hurt her like that again.

Kara figured, with the amount of time she had left on this mission, Alex might not have the _chance_ to hurt her like that again.

But she’d smile at her; she’d make that weird shift thing happen.

Kara would be more than willing to stick around for that.

“So, I have a question,” Alex started, staring impatiently into the backroom from her position seated next to Kara.  “How did I get into that nightgown?”

Heat flooded Kara’s cheeks, and she pressed her hands to her face.  Such emotional tells were subject to intense bouts of punishment at CADMUS, and Kara had worked for years to control them.  For some reason, all of that hard work went up in smoke around the attractive brunette.

Alex sent a dimpled grin her way, all teeth, pinched eyes, and crinkled nose and Kara couldn’t help the laugh that escaped her.

 “Someone actually finds you funny Danvers, guess the world did go to hell.”  A man emerged from the back, wearing jeans and a white and blue baseball shirt.  The neck dipped low, showing off a hint of chest hair and a silver chain.  He was taller than Kara, and obviously worked out, but his demeanor was one of defeat; sorrow.

The laugh died in her throat.

“Or, we were visited by an Angel.  Hard to tell these days.”  Alex sent another grin her way.  “This is Linda, she’s a friend so you know… don’t be a dick.”

The man looked affronted, dark eyes squinting at Alex in the low light.  “That’s like asking a giraffe to lose its spots.  It’s just not right.”

Alex hit the bell on the counter forcing a wince from the man who slammed his hand over the device to stop the residual sound.  “Linda, this is Mon-El.  He’s Superman’s pet project; his way of trying to make up for all of his sins.”

Mon-El scowled, moving the bell away from Alex’s reach.  “What a pleasant introduction.”  He turned to Kara with a kind smile.  “Hello beautiful, I am so very sorry that you have to be around this cesspool for extended periods of time.”

Linda frowned.  He was of her house.  Alex had called him El, which meant that he was subject to all of the protections that afforded him.  As head of her house, she was responsible for him.

But his words made her want to crush his skull.

“Alex is not a cesspool.”  She said quietly, hands clenching in her lap.  “Please do not talk about her like that.”

Two sets of eyes blinked at her in astonishment, Alex being the first to recover.  She smiled, eyes bright with laughter as she turned back to Mon-El.  “Yeah doofus, don’t talk about me like that.”

Mon-El’s mouth moved like a fish, opening and closing in confusion before he huffed and shook his head.  “Apologies.” He grumbled.  “Anything else you would like milady?”

Linda’s frown deepened, body tensing and Alex laughed outright now.  The agent reached over and took her hand, squeezing it gently.  

“It’s ok Linda, he’s just joking.  We both are.  We don’t really know how else to talk to each other except in insults.”  She shrugged, regarding the man before her with something like grossed out affection.  “We get to be as childish as we want with each other with no consequences.”

Oh.

Well, now she felt foolish.

Alex rubbed a hand over her shoulder, taking an offered soda from Mon-El’s hand and placing it in front of her.

“I need your expertise.”  She was saying as Kara popped open the can in front of her.  Mon-El reached under the bar, coming back up with something in plastic wrappings, opening it and then placing it in Kara’s newly opened drink.  “You been on COD lately?”

It was a silly straw!!!

Winn had gotten her one from the Wonder Woman fan shop and she had enjoyed watching her drink go through the twists and turns.  This was so awesome!

“When am I not on COD?”  Mon-El returned, resting his forearms on the bar and leaning forward.

“Great!  I need you to start being super into techy stuff on there.  Winn will coach you.”

Mon-El quirked an eyebrow.  “First question:  did you ask Winn?  Second question: why?”

Kara pulled her eyes away from her supercool straw—this one was a star! —to look at Alex’s slightly confused, slightly caught face.

No, she had not asked Winn.

“Because,” she said instead of answering, “I think that’s where an alien terrorist group is recruiting people from.  And since you’re technically invulnerable you have a better chance of defending yourself should they go all Silence of the Lambs on your ass.  Plus, you pretty much can’t be turned to any side—good or bad—the only side you really care about is your own.  And more often than not, your side is my side, so… we win.”

“Uh huh.”  The man should really stop squinting, Kara thought.  Ms. Grant always said people who squinted so much got wrinkles and wrinkles were hideous.  “And you don’t have any super cool--” he glanced at Kara— “ _friends_ who could help you out here?”

Alex was already shaking her head.  “Winn sucks at COD, he’s better at MMO’s.  And no one at the FBI is at your skill level.”

“Yep, great.  But I wasn’t talking about them jac—rabbits are so cute.”  Mon-El shot Kara another look before quickly moving to the freezer behind the bar and pulling out a tub of ice cream.  Kara sat up straighter.  This was getting better and better!  “I think we both know that you have another friend out there who kicks my ass in COD on a weekly basis AND is a computer genius.”  He placed a fresh strawberry milkshake with blackberries on top in front of Kara.  Maybe she didn’t mind if he called Alex names.  “AND since I’m such a standup guy, I won’t even tell her that she wasn’t your first choice.”

Alex’s face was pinched in thought, finger tracing random patterns into the bar top.

Mon-El shook his head.  “Yeah you think that over, lunch crowds comin in.”

As if his words had brought them, the bell rung over the doorway and Kara glanced over her shoulder to see who had entered.

And almost snorted her milkshake!

That was an Infernian!

More people—aliens! —came into the bar.  In broad daylight!

Golly!

They weren’t even trying to hide!  And Alex seemed extremely nonplussed, face still pursed in concentration as she stared at the wall opposite her.

Mon-El greeted everyone as if they were old frenemies, insulting them all in kind with a smile and a high five.

Kara stared on in wide eyed amazement as a Valerian woman shoved at a Bro’os man near a pool table.  Mon-El easily stepped between the two with a tray of fries that he had gotten from seemingly nowhere and the fight was done.

An arm slinging over her shoulders returned her attention to herself and she turned still wide eyes to a short Latina woman.

“So, you must be Linda.”

The blonde blinked, unable to fully compute everything with the overload of simulation.  This was a lot.

“FELICITY!”  Alex’s triumphant shout almost made her fall off her stool, but the newcomer caught her easily, obviously used to such outbursts.  The brunette didn’t even notice, instead scrabbling for her phone and hastily typing on the keypad.

“Don’t mind Alex, she’ll return to us eventually.  Now you,” here she offered up an adorably dimpled smile, “you I am excited to learn all about.  I’m Maggie.”

Oh.

 _Oh._ Alex’s Maggie!  
  


“You’re Alex’s friend.”  She stated unhelpfully, trying to shut off her senses from all the insane sights, sounds and _smells_ occurring in the bar.  She had not been prepared for this.

 

“Aw, she’s mentioned me?  That’s so sweet!  She can’t stop talking about you either.”  Maggie sat next to her, sandwiching Kara between Alex and herself and unknowingly helping to ground the younger woman.  “She told me you’re _nice_.”

 

Kara tilted her head in confusion.  “Why does everyone say it like that?  Like it is an odd trait to have?”

 

“This is the city hun, not much niceness to go around here.”  A new voice entered from in front of them, sliding a sweaty bottle over to Maggie.  Kara stared up into the oldest eyes she had ever seen.  “Can I get you anything nice girl?”  The woman offered her a kind smile, her dark skin smooth and unblemished and … perfect.  Kara had never seen such perfect skin, the bones of the other woman’s face prominent and strong and creating a canvas of wonder.  She had full lips, painted in pink and pulled back over a row of straight white teeth.  Thick ropes of long black hair, tinged purple in some areas, hung around her face; most of which was tied in a knot at the top of her head, defying gravity itself.  The rest hung free, giving the woman an aura of freedom and power that left Kara breathless.  Her brows were thick, her lashes long; she was beautiful.

 

She opened her mouth, closed it.  Opened her mouth… and closed it.  She was reminding herself, very unfavorably of Mon-El.

 

“She’ll have a basket of onion rings, and your cauliflower buffalo bites please.”  Alex slid her phone back into her pocket, finally tuning back into the conversation in front of her.  “She’s a vegetarian so don’t let that asshat Dwight use the same fryer.  They’re really good to try Linda, we can order something else if you don’t like it ok?”  Alex finished, turning to look at her companion.

 

Kara could only nod dumbly.

 

The woman smiled, jotting the order down on her notepad.  “And for you Alex?  Maggie?”

 

The agent grimaced.  “A hangover cure please.”

 

“I’ll have what Linda’s having.”

 

The woman nodded, “coming right up.”

 

And then she was gone.

 

Which was just as well, because Kara was struggling to remember what breathing was supposed to feel like.

 

Maggie patted her back sympathetically.  “That was M’gann, she has that effect on all of us.”

 

Alex quirked an eyebrow, “when did you get here?”

 

“Seriously Danvers?”  Maggie asked with a roll of her eyes.  “I’ve been chatting up your girl for like 10 minutes now.”

 

Alex’s cheeks flushed, and she turned wide eyes to Kara.  “Whatever she told you is a _lie._ ”

 

Kara tilted her head in confusion, finally feeling more like herself after that completely unexpected episode.  “You don’t think I’m nice?”

 

More red rushed to Alex’s face, going to the tips of her ears.  Kara loved it when that happened.  Alex blushing all the way to her ears was the single most adorable thing she had ever seen.

 

“NO!  I do!  I think you’re amazing.  But whatever other feely things she said—just—I mean, some of it might be—”

 

“You finished drowning yet Danvers?”  Maggie asked with a smug look.

 

Alex scowled, crossing her arms and slouching onto the bar to sulk.  “I hate you.”

 

Kara had to bite her lip to hide her reaction to Alex’s adorableness.

 

But…

 

Well… Alex _had_ kissed her twice now.  Maybe it was okay for Kara to return the favor?

 

_Rao give me strength._

 

She leaned forward, pressing a gentle kiss to Alex’s hair and feeling her own cheeks heat at the contact.  Alex’s hair smelled of literal roses; as if she had doused herself in oils from the flower.  It was intoxicating.

 

Pulling back, she allowed her hand to drop to Alex’s and give a gentle squeeze to the beet red agent.  “I think you’re pretty amazing too.”

 

Maggie’s laugh carried over the bar.

 

~*~

The food Alex had ordered was amazing!  Especially the onion rings.

Mon-El had even given her another milkshake!

She was really loving this alien bar.

According to Maggie, the place had been a rundown drunk tank for the seediest inhabitants of National City.  M’gann had been a bartender and Mon-El had been just another pissed out drunk.  Both had been in hiding.

An accident involving fire had revealed M’gann’s true nature of being a Martian and the owner of the bar had forced her to become his champion in an alien fighting ring.  She’d been relegated to little more than an animal for the better part of a year before the case had landed on Maggie’s desk.  Alex had been bored and had simply tagged along.

At least that’s what Maggie had said—her heartbeat said that Alex’s presence wasn’t purely coincidental.  Either way the ladies had taken down the fight ring, but the owner had been furious with M’gann for no longer being ‘useful’ to him.  He’d attacked her at the bar, sealed the entrances and had every intention of killing her.  He’d used her fear of fire against her, trapping her and making her defenseless.

Mon-El’s intervention had saved her life; but it had almost cost him his freedom.  Alex had stepped in and made it go away.  The body, the charges, everything.

M’gann had taken the bar over when the deed had mysteriously gone missing, offering Mon-El a job and a room.

Maggie didn’t give any more details and Alex didn’t offer any.  Instead the agent sipped at a neon pink monstrosity in front of her that had what looked like floating bits of egg.  Maggie looked as grossed out as Kara, but also… sad.

The detective was charming; fun and teasingly coy.  And Kara could tell she infuriated Alex to no end, but there was also a genuine warmth there.  A steady and enduring friendship that had seen them through a lot.

Kara quite liked her.

Alex’s phone dinging interrupted Maggie’s retelling of Alex’s dissertation, in which she made it her sole purpose to disprove everything her Nuclear Fission Professor had tried teaching her.  She’d titled it “The Factors Leading to the Absolute and Complete Downfall of Human Intelligence: A Case Study.”

She’d been politely asked to edit it.

“Winn’s got a name.”  Alex said, typing into her phone.  “I wanted to corner Bryan if you’re up for it Mags.  And you Linda, we need to get your keys—”

“There are humans outside!”  A pink alien yelled, slamming the door shut behind him as he fought for breath.  “They are marching down the street!  They have someone in a cage!”

The stench of fear on him was strong, and Kara had to fight not to cover her face.

Maggie frowned, standing up and resting her hand on her service weapon, a move mimicked by Alex.

“Hey, I’m just gonna see what’s happening alright?”  Alex whispered, eyes taking in the few aliens that had already made to leave the bar—Mon-El included.

Kara grabbed her hand when she went to follow him.  No way was she allowing Alex to interfere with a human mob alone!

The brunette sighed but tugged her along out into the afternoon sun.  It was barely half past 2, but the mob outside made it look like the entire day had been stretched to nothingness.

They weren’t close to the bar, for which Kara was grateful.  But they were within eyesight, about 6 or so blocks down.  There were at least a hundred of them, holding signs and chanting hate filled rhetoric.  A cry like from a lion pierced the air, and the crowd parted just so to reveal a cage in the middle of the frenzy.

A green beast was in the enclosure, part lion part monkey… no that wasn’t right… it was shifting, it’s features blending jaggedly through different animals as it was electrocuted.  When, finally, the cattle prod was pulled away, the beast shifted into a green human looking boy in torn up clothing.  The boy promptly curled into a ball in the center of the cage, trying to make himself as small as possible.

Kara remembered trying to do the same.

Remembered being scared.

She wasn’t scared now.

A hand on her wrist stopped her from taking the first step and she looked down at the hand and then up at Alex. 

“You can’t go out there, not like this.  Maggie’s called in backup.”

“Fat good that’ll do.  Those pigs hate us as much as that lot!  It’ll take hours before they even care to show up.”  Mon-El was seething, barely restrained by M’gann whose anger was a silent force of death.

“I’m one of those pigs!” Maggie countered, pocketing her cell and glaring at Mon-El, but not refuting his statement.

The man didn’t even flinch, nostrils flaring as he tried to control his fury.

Kara didn’t have that issue.

“Hey!” Alex insisted.  “They’ll eat you alive ok?  Let’s just wait—”

“They are hurting him.”  Rage settled low in Kara’s stomach at the scene before her; the laughter, the jeers, the angry shouts of hatred. She knew without a shadow of a doubt that if she acted now, her cover would be blown.  CADMUS did not allow for such mistakes.

Alex read the frustration on her face, gripping her forearms and turning her so they were face to face.  “I get it ok, but these things happen a lot more than anyone would like.  It’s not uncommon; the police will get here and sort it out.”

“And you see nothing wrong with this?”  Kara seethed, blinking rapidly to try to stem her powers.  She needed to see Lillian.  She needed to leave this area _now.  “You think this is ok?”_

“I don’t like it Linda, but I’m hardly in any position to enact change.”

“You allow it to happen.  You are complicit.”  Her voice was a hiss now, hands coming up to clamp over her eyes in irritation.  She took a breath, dropping her hands and ignoring the way Alex’s fingers clenched in her skin.  “Is this really who you are Agent Danvers?”

Alex stared at her hard, anger warring with bewilderment on her face.  Behind her Maggie watched them, hand still on her sidearm and seemingly awaiting Alex’s move.

The redhead made a noise of exasperation in her throat, raising her hands to Kara’s face.  “Fucking—You _stay_ here.  Don’t move.”  Her eyes flickered over to Mon-El and the other aliens.  “You either.”

Then she was walking towards the procession with Maggie in tow.  Maggie stopped at the perimeter, eyes flicking over the mob as Alex moved seamlessly within their masses.

Kara watched as she easily moved through the people there, mimicking their actions to blend in as she made her way towards the cage.  When she got there, she slammed the guards head into solid steel, snatching the keys from his hand and opening the door amongst the shocked silence that greeted her actions.

Alex ignored all of them, stooping to the boy’s height and offering her hand.  _That_ got the attention of the ring leader and he shouted obscenities as he made his way towards them.  He reached out, intent on hauling Alex away from the boy who was looking on fearfully, and Kara prepared herself to intercept—consequences be damned.  

She was unnecessary.

Alex dropped the man as easily as she had dropped his fellow and stood tall before the throng of angry protestors flashing her badge.

“Does anyone else have a problem here?  Do I need to figure out whose parole officer I need to contact?  What disgruntled rich parent I’ll need to get in touch with for your sorry ass lawyers?”  

They scattered, still spewing hatred but wise enough not to entangle themselves with the FBI.  Maggie stood watch, arms braced on her hips; jacket pushed back to reveal both her gun and her badge.  They gave her a wide berth.

Alex brought the boy back to the bar, supporting him on one side as Maggie brought up the rear, eyes watching for anyone who might have decided to be a hero.

Kara caught the boy’s other arm, helping them inside the bar and to the backroom where M’gann directed them.

They lay him down on the table, cleared of any food and Alex went to work; asking quietly for certain items as she gave the boy a thorough examination.

He was slight in nature, looking barely into his teen years and everything on him was green.  Green skin, green hair, green eyes.  And he had sharp incisors, like a canine, one of which jutted over his upper lip.

Alex tsked.

“You’re gonna have your hands full getting him back to goal weight.”  She said as she removed her hands from the boy’s abdomen.  “He’s severely malnourished.  He needs water and food.”

Maggie shrugged from her position by the door.  “Eh, a little TLC and he’ll be good as new.  We take care of our own.”

The boy blinked, eyes glossy with fever as he stared dazedly around the room.  “You’re like me?”

M’gann offered a kind smile, hand moving to the boy’s neck as she helped him take a few sips of water from a cup in her hand.  “More than you think.  What’s your name hun?”

The boy licked his lips, speaking again in a stiff impression of English, his accent placing him from somewhere near South Africa.  “Garfield ma’am.  Garfield Logan.”

 

~*~

 

Alex was frustrated.  

She shouldn’t have done that.

Couldn’t be upset that she had.

She’d saved that kid; Mon-El hadn’t been joking, it would have taken more time than warranted for the cops to show face.  In that time, it could have turned way uglier.  Crowds with that much anger and hate in them, going unchecked… she didn’t like the kid’s chances.

But she’d publicly sympathized with an alien.  CADMUS wasn’t known for recruiting alien lovers, and she had just put herself between a lot of angry people and a shapeshifter.

Kara was depending on her and she might have just risked everything!

She breathed slowly, ever aware of Linda walking next to her, spare keys in hand.

They’d stopped off at Catco, but the woman had been quiet ever since they’d left the bar, eyes troubled and lost in thought.  Alex wanted to talk to her, to make sure she was ok, but she couldn’t get out of her own head.

Didn’t want to risk any anger leaching into her words against the other woman.  Linda had done nothing wrong, taking her anger out on her would solve nothing.  It would only make them both feel horrible.  She was keeping her mouth shut.

She stopped in front of the blonde’s building, hands shoved into the pockets of her jacket.  It had been a long day, she just wanted to go home.  Tomorrow she could pick this back up.

“I’m sorry.”  Linda murmured, eyes on her door and fingers fiddling with her keys.  She shook her head, pushing hair out of her face with her left hand.  “I didn’t mean to upset you earlier I just… what they were doing was wrong.  But I endangered you and that’s not ok either.  So, I’m sorry.”

Brown eyes flickered back up to her own hazel ones and Alex sighed, a knot loosening in her chest as she shook her head.  “You did the right thing, it was better that I interfered than that they kept hurting that kid.  I would want someone to interfere if it were Jon.  It was the right thing Linda.”  She made sure to keep eye contact, urging the other woman to believe her.

Finally, a small smile appeared on Linda’s face and she nodded slowly.  

“Ok.”  She confirmed.  She glanced back to her building, before turning back to Alex.  “Well than I guess I’ll see you on Monday Agent Danvers.”

Alex nodded, opening her mouth to reply when she felt soft lips brush her cheek.

The words died in her throat as little bolts of electricity raced through her form and heat ran through her veins.

Linda pulled away, a blush staining her cheeks and a sly smile on her mouth.  She took a step backward, eyes still on Alex and promptly tripped up her steps, “eeping” and wind milling her arms to avoid a full-face plant.

Dammit!  Even her tripping was cute.

Alex was so fucked.

~*~

 

By the time she got back to her apartment it was almost six and Eliza was just finishing what looked like a load of laundry.

“Seriously?” She questioned her mother, toeing of her boots and hanging her jacket by the door.

“This is what mother’s do Alexandra, get used to it.  How did your case solving go?”

Alex groaned, falling face first onto her couch, and incidentally, the warm sheets Eliza had just folded.  Her mother tsked, smacking the back of Alex’s head with a towel but making no moves to get rid of her.

“There wasn’t much ‘case solving’ after we left.”  She rolled over, explaining what had happened with a few edits, ever mindful of Eliza’s anxiety when it came to her safety.  The sheets she was on were dryer warm and smelled like fabric softener.  She loved it when her mom did her laundry, Alex herself could never quite replicate the smell.

“Hmm, I can’t say I’m pleased that Linda forced your hand, but I’m also aware that you have chosen a certain profession.”  Eliza raised blonde eyebrows, peering intently at her daughter.  “I like her.  She’s good for you.”

Alex chuckled.  “You sound like a matchmaker, you realize people don’t really do ‘friend dates’, anymore right?”

Eliza hummed, matching socks and tossing them into the basket on Alex’s coffee table.  “Well than it’s a good thing I am not talking about you being ‘friends’.  Hopefully that is not the game you are playing dear, a girl like that deserves to be courted properly.”

Ice swept through Alex’s body, her heart raging in her chest as she tried to come up with something to say.  Eliza knew.

Eliza _knew._

“Courted?”  The question came out strangled, but it was the only thing Alex could settle on at the moment.  She wasn’t confirming _anything._ Not until she knew what cards her mother was playing with.

“Yes, you know: chased, pursued, riddled with presents, food, and compliments?”

Ok… so Eliza had a lot of cards.

“Mom…”  She didn’t even know where to start.

“Hush Alex, do you honestly think I didn’t know?  I’ve been waiting for _you_ to be comfortable enough to tell me.  I didn’t want to push.  I’m a scientist honey… I’ve studied you since the moment I knew you existed.  My greatest desire was to learn everything I could about you and give you everything you needed to live a happy and full life.  So, when you started letting Kara sleep in your bed, even though I knew she wasn’t having nightmares every night…  I wanted to respect your privacy.  And then we lost Dad and you were so torn up about Kara that I—I didn’t want to hurt you anymore than I already had.  The things that I did after… the decisions I’d made…  I couldn’t force you out of the proverbial ‘closet’ Alex…  Not when I thought I was the reason you were there in the first place.”  Eliza blinked back tears, holding one of Alex’s sweaters to her chest as she peered off in the distance.  “There should never have been a closet Alex.  I should have made sure that you knew you never needed a closet.  At least not with me.  But you’d built one anyway, so I hoped to show you that I’d love you no matter who you chose… But Alex—that girl… well, if I believed in soulmates then I’d be pretty sure that’s her.  So, the time where I could wait for you to come clean has ended.”

Tears sprang unbidden to her eyes at her mother’s easy acceptance.  Maggie had told her Eliza would be more understanding than her own parents; hell, Felicity had offered to throw her a ‘coming out’ party.  She’d ignored both of them… for years.

“Soulmate?”  She choked out, pressing her hands into her eyes.  “Seriously mom?  You spent a few hours with Linda at most.”

“Hmm, I knew it in 1.”  Alex peered up at her mother, astonished eyes barely blinking.  Eliza sighed, setting aside her laundry and cupping Alex’s face in her palms.  “Sweetheart, you couldn’t stop staring at her.  Every conversation you’ve had since you were a little girl, you barely pay attention to the other person unless it was about science.  I appreciated it, other people…. Not so much.  You hang on her every word.  And after _I_ talked to her?”  Eliza raised a brow, a teasing smile coming to her lips and Alex snorted at the ridiculous expression.  Her mother wiped a tear from her eye, speaking softly as she continued.  “You see things in black and white, Linda doesn’t.”  Alex scoffed at _that_ understatement, sniffling as she tried to control her raging emotions.  “You need a little bit of that sweetheart.  You need some grey.”

Alex nodded slowly, even though her eyes were uncertain.  “There’s a chance that if I allow myself to be someone who deserves her, that I won’t be able to find Kara.  I don’t know if I can do that.”

Eliza sighed, “That plan of yours was always silly anyway.  You have a certified computing genius—two of them—as your best friends.  You have superheroes who would help you turn over the world to find her.  You’ve just never accepted any help that you didn’t ask for.  You’ve made this so much more complicated sweetheart.  I don’t think Linda is the problem, I think you just need to let other people in.”

“I don’t know how.”  Alex hated how small her voice sounded and tried to pull away from her mother.  Eliza was having none of that however and pulled her child into a tight embrace.  

“I know baby, but you have friends— family who love you.  We’ll help you ok?  You just have to let us help you.”

Alex gave up trying to fight the tears, sniffling quietly in her mother’s embrace.  “For the record,” Eliza murmured.  “ _You_ deserve to be courted too.”

~*~

Kara did not report in to Lillian.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that happened. Oh the feels.
> 
> The next few chapters are going to be lumped on top of eachother in terms of time, so things will feel a little speedy maybe. IDK, we go into a lot of detail for a few chapters. Then I think we have one or two more jumps and then the finale. The big bang. The Armaggedon. 0.0
> 
> Anyway, just to be clear, Eliza was not a willful alcoholic/addict. She went to a doctor who prescribed her addictive medicines for capital gain. It actually wasn't a very uncommon thing back when I was growing up and I knew a few people who's lives got wrecked because their bodies couldn't handle the medications they were exposed to. I myself was treated for a physical illness and given experimental drugs without prior knowledge of the side effects, one of which was being paralyzed. Nothing so major happened, thank goodness but it does stand to reason that you should always always ask questions. Even if you think you're being annoying, asking is better than dying.
> 
> Thus ends our PSA.
> 
> Alex is going to remember everything, it'll come back in bits and pieces and then our clever little lady will put it all together maybe... I mean she did cut an ethernet cable so maybe not that bright... but she'll try and effort is 80% of the battle or something like that.
> 
> Kara and Eliza are my jam, just because Eliza chose to love Kara. She took in an alien for goodness sake and gave her her whole heart. At least she did on the show, we'll see more about what happened here in this fic a little later on. Not gonna lie, I cried a little writing it.
> 
> Also, in case you didn't get the reference, Garfield Logan is actually codename: Beastboy, memeber of the Teen Titans. I wanted to bring them into the final battle and I thought this was a cute little intro into why they'd be so pissed off. He won't be a major player, but I needed Alex to get her shit together.
> 
> And my M'gann is not the actress played on the show. She's anything you want her to be, but in my head I'm thinking 90's era Lauren Hill or Lisa Bonet... idk someone more earthy. And yeah, Kara did swoon a little because I used to- sue me.
> 
> Mon-El I tried to make hot-headed and arrogant, but when I tried to make him the same way to Kara he just turned into a ball of fluff. I call it the Kara effect, Mel is just too adorable to have anyone but Lillian be mean to her.
> 
> .... And I think that's it. What'd you guys think of Eliza? Did she make you wanna hug your moms? I hugged mine. She told me I was weird.


	11. I Can Stop the Pain (if I will it all away)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Recap:
> 
> Eliza had a substance abuse problem after Kara and Jeremiah 'left' due to a defective psychologist. Somehow she and Alex repaired their relationship after such a fallout but Alex is still surprised to find her mother in her kitchen when she awakes from her night of terrible decisions. 
> 
> Eliza and Linda were chatting in the kitchen making breakfast which wigged Alex out to no end, but she did manage a weird apology of sorts to Linda.
> 
> Linda went through Alex's things and pointed her in the right direction in her ALFA case.
> 
> Alex took her to the alien bar, where we met Mon-El, M'gann, and Kara met Maggie.
> 
> A human riot had the crew rushing out and watching as a boy was tortured and Kara may have accidentally shown her hand when she lost her temper. Alex was forced to make a decision and saved the shapeshifter that was being harassed by the mob.
> 
> Kara later apologized for putting her in danger, but Alex reassured her that she had made the right choice.
> 
> Something that Eliza concurred with when she told Alex she needed to get her shit together. After a particularly rousing speech from her mother, Alex finally started to let some walls fall down. Adorbs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise?
> 
> Since I am trying to find my rhythm again, this chapter is up due to regularly scheduled programming. We're going back to every other monday for the foreseeable future and hopefully much more consistency.
> 
> I'd also like to thank everyone who's been commenting. Your words truly brighten my day and help give me insight into what I need to clarify and what needs to not be clarified so it's very helpful. Even the gushing makes me feel good, so thanks for all of it. You guys are awesome.
> 
> Without further ado, here is chapter 10! Thanks to my Beta, Keziah who was kind enough to edit this for us! Supergirl belongs to DC, not I. I own only the plot idea.
> 
> Song: Whisper- Evanescence

I Can Stop the Pain (if I will it all away)

 

So, Linda was an alien.  

It was a lot less surprising than Alex had thought it would be.  Honestly, it kind of all made sense.  The alien camp, the speaking alien languages, the whole thinking _Alex_ was the weird one… She’d referred to humans as humans for fucks sake!  The glowing eyes at the mob scene the day before certainly hadn’t helped the assistant’s case.

Although she now had to wonder if she was an ALFA plant. She seriously doubted it, if Linda had been part of ALFA she’d had plenty of opportunities to erase Cat Grant from existence. She hadn’t… but Alex liked to have all her bases covered.

Plus, she didn’t even know what kind of alien she was.

Aside from her language and the glowy eyes, and the complete lack of knowledge on human pop culture (and ridiculous amount of knowledge on all things alien), Linda hadn’t really revealed much. And Alex wasn’t very interested in digging into this particular subject matter.

At least not outside of the realms required by her job.

Linda had done nothing to suggest she couldn’t be trusted. She’d been nothing but kind and helpful to Alex.  If Alex messed up, set off the wrong alarms to the wrong people, Linda would be put in harm’s way.  She wasn’t fool enough to believe that ousting Aliens in hiding led to happiness and smooth immigration processes.  If she was lucky, Linda would be relegated to a ‘safe zone’—little more than internment camps where governments decided how you could be useful to their countries— or told to leave the planet.  Exposing her, even accidentally, was not something Alex was willing to do.

Her recently acknowledged feelings for the woman had nothing to do with it.

“ _There’s a river in Egypt named after you_.”

Felicity’s voice came over the speaker of her phone and Alex sighed in defeat.  Of course.  Leave it to her best friend to pop whatever bubble of confidence she’d had.

“ _Dude, it has everything to do with the fact that for the first time in your adult life, you have actually developed romantical feelings for another person.  I never thought this day would come.”_ There was a brief interruption as Felicity cursed out whoever was trying to kill her in her online gameplay.  A loud whoop was heard when she took the poor sod out.  “ _I’m so proud of you Alex.  I’m like a proud mama._ ”

“You are blowing this way out of proportion.  Besides… I’m not even sure what to do about it.  Hank wouldn’t approve, and he has every reason not to.  He was right, my track record with women and assignments is beyond subpar.”

“ _Hank isn’t benching you because he thinks you’re a bad person Alex.  He’s benching you because he’s scared shitless you’re going to do something to get yourself killed.  All those new rules he’s enforcing?  He’s like a dad babyproofing every surface he can get his hands on.  It’s kind of cute.  He should buy you one of those backpacks with the leash attachment.  But anyway, if you actually talked to him about Linda he’d change his tune.”_

“I’m not so sure.”  Alex replied, pulling her hand through her hair as she continued eating her cereal.  It was early, nearing 4am now, but once Alex had explained what she needed Felicity had told her this would be the best time.  Apparently catching ALFA recruiters interested in gaming tech nerds required pulling an all-nighter.  Felicity had won 2 games in Battlefield 1 and was on her 5th game of Call of Duty: World War 2.  “We shouldn’t be talking about this right now anyway.  Patch Winn back in.”

Felicity let out a pathetic whine.  “ _But we barely talk anymore!  When else am I supposed to get the tea?”_

Alex tilted her head, oblivious to the fact that Felicity couldn’t actually see her confused expression.  “The tea?”

“ _Yes!  The 411, the news, the down-low_.”  Alex shoved another spoon of cereal into her mouth as the other woman prattled on.  “ _William’s been teaching me all kinds of new slang_.”

“Of course, he has.”  Alex conceded with an eye roll, thinking of Felicity’s twelve-year-old stepson.

_“What have you got so far Mr. Robot?”_

Winn’s voice came a beat after Felicity’s, tinny and clearly exhausted _.  “I’ve got something on one of the lady gamers actually.  She’s got decent security so it’s taking a bit to get in, but I’m about 95% of the way through.  What have you guys been talking about?”_

“Felicity’s new vocabulary.”

“ _Ha!  You wish!  We’re talking about the fact that Alex is in love.”_ Felicity teased, laugh coming through obnoxiously on Alex’s phone and the Agent scowled, her cheeks flushing as the other woman proceeded to make kissing noises.

“ _I totally called it!  Fuck yeah_!”  Winn exclaimed.

Alex really hated her friends.

“Don’t you guys have something better to do?  Like oh I don’t know?  Stop a potential genocide?”

“ _Yeesh.  So serious.”_

 _“I know right!?  I got it anyway, your majesty.  Name’s gonna be Lilu Dallas.”_ Winn said, rattling off an address, phone number and other details.  Alex jotted it all down, before a yawn took over her entire body.

 _“You guys should head to sleep.  You’ve got actual jobs that you are accountable to.  I just build awesome software.  I’ll keep working on an invite to the evil alien empire and pass the word on when I get a hit.”_ Felicity offered, the sound of button mashing coming over the speaker.

“Be careful and call me as soon as you get a hit.”  Finally faced with the possibility of sleep, Alex stood and dumped her now empty bowl into the sink.

“ _Will do.  Text me a picture of your girl!”_

“No.  And she’s not my girl.”

 _“I’ll do it!”_ Winn’s voice was excited, and Alex scowled intensely at her phone.

“Winn, I will murder you.”

“ _And, I’ll make all your electronics make Raccoon fart noises!_ ”  Felicity threatened.

There was a beat of silence as Alex thought through her options.  She knew she couldn’t take the threat lightly.  Felicity could do that and more.

“I hate you both.”  She hissed.  “Don’t ever talk to me again!  I’m telling your mom that you entered a beauty pageant junior year!”

“ _Love you too!”_ There was a dinging sound and then Felicity audibly inhaled _.  “Dude!  She’s hot!  I’m so proud of you.  I’m gonna run like 20 background checks on her but yeah, still proud.”_

“Because she’s aesthetically pleasing?”  Alex rolled her eyes, pulling her shirt over her head as she made her way to her couch.  With Eliza here for the holidays she’d forced her mother into the bedroom.  There was no way she was allowing the older woman to sleep on anything but a bed; fit she may be, but she was still Alex’s mom and she deserved a bed!  Eliza had not gone quietly, only the threat of Alex staying away on Christmas enough to get her to agree.  “How very shallow of you.  I’ll have you know that Linda is way more than just her looks.”

“ _You are adorable.  I was proud because she doesn’t look like the trashy bimbos you usually jerk around.”_

“HEY!”

_“-up!  Gotta go, might have something.  I’ll call you when you return to the land of the living.”_

Winn chuckled, saying goodbye to them both and muttering about Alex having her ass handed to her before disconnecting the call.

Alex really really didn’t like her friends.

~*~

Being called in to CADMUS on a Sunday was not Kara’s idea of a good time.  Unfortunately, it was also not something she could avoid.  

She had received a message through her neural network; the display in her left eye alerting her of the request to meet at the civilian location.

So now here she was, dressed as Linda Taylor, standing in the middle of National City National Park.  All around her were people; friends out for a stroll, families entertaining their children. It was loud.

It was very loud.  She inhaled deeply, pausing to close her eyes for a moment to try to ground herself.

“That is a weakness we cannot afford Ms. Taylor. Are you in need of servicing?”

Kara opened her eyes, refocusing her attention on her surroundings and her approaching guest.  It made sense that Lillian would pick this place; the noise level would have given anyone difficulty picking up on someone’s approach. But Lillian wasn’t just a random person, she was Kara’s creator. She’d have been aware of her presence drugged out of her mind in a room full of cicadas.

She stood, her posture remaining relaxed as she allowed a small smile to appear on her face. They were in public, people needed to see two old friends reconnecting. Not an asset and her director.

“No Ms. Luthor. I apologize for the display, I am simply… out of practice.” She responded, eyes taking in the blonde woman before her. Lilian was dressed in a purple pantsuit, a pressed white shirt underneath and black heels on her feet. She looked entirely matronly in the business clothes and Kara then became aware of another presence. A heartbeat that made her own quicken.

Lillian hummed, staring at Kara for a moment before nodding. The gesture was apparently her lackies cue to release the child in their care, and a small girl was suddenly barreling towards Kara at near inhuman speeds.

She caught her effortlessly, barely even remembering lowering herself to wrap her arms securely around her child.

Her daughter.

Kalasin.

Standing, she clutched her baby to her chest. One arm wrapped firmly around her middle, the other cradling the back of her head. She pressed her face into Kalasin’s and just breathed.

She hadn’t been able to do this for almost a year.

She fought the tears that wanted to leak from her eyes. Lillian did not appreciate such displays. The fact that she was allowing them to embrace was enough to let Kara know that Lillian wanted to remind her of what she had left. She fingered the implant behind Kalasin’s ear.

And of how quickly Lillian could take it all away.

She pressed a small kiss to the buzz cut on her child’s hair, the soft strands tickling her lips and making Kalasin pop up and press a kiss to Kara’s cheek.

Kara allowed herself a few seconds of looking into her child’s eyes before she internally steeled herself and set the child on her feet.

Kalasin refused to let go of her hand.

“Thank you.” The words were forced past the lump in her throat and Kara struggled to find her composure. This was a million times more difficult with her emotions in play, but even so, showing a weakness—any weakness—in front of Lillian could be deadly. “Ms. Luthor, this was a very nice surprise. I am grateful for your compassion.”

Lillian smiled, her hands slipping into the pockets of her pantsuit, completely at ease. “It was no problem. K-3S9 has been a great help recently and was asking to see you. Who am I to deny a child her mother’s love?” The question was clearly rhetorical and so the Kryptonian only offered a tight smile in return. “I am going to get this little one some ice cream, would you like a cone as well?” Behind her Kara could make out about 6 armed men all in plain clothes dispersed throughout the park. Blending in with the citizens of National City.

She nodded, “that would be nice thank you.”

“Your watch.”

Kara held out her arm and Lillian pressed her thumb over the front face plate. The device slipped easily from Kara’s wrist with only a slight stinging sensation.

Lillian smiled and walked away towards the truck. Kara did not try to flee. It would be pointless. Kalasin was not a full Kryptonian. Lillian would be able to kill her with the click of a single button. Probably had the chip programmed to fry her child’s brain if she departed more than a few meters from her.

“Hey baby.” She said, kneeling in front of Kalasin. She brought her hands up, palms cupped towards her chest and thumbs pointing up as she signed and spoke. “How are you?”

The smile on Kalasin’s face was bright as she took in the gestures and she immediately brought her own hands up. Her small open hand, dropping from her chin and moving incredibly fast as she signed back. “Good! I got to see the animals! Ms. Luthor let me pet a dog!” Her fingers snapped loudly in her excitement.

Kara could only smile, throat tight at the happiness before her. Kalasin continued regaling her with the story of the group bringing her here. At almost 4 years old, her daughter had all the energy one might expect from someone her age. Her hair was kept short, barely growing more than 2-3 inches past her scalp. Lillian saw long hair as a liability and up until her current assignment, Kara had sported the same style.

Kalasin was missing a tooth on the right side of her mouth, the exposed gum only adding to the adorableness in Kara’s opinion. Being part Kryptonian did lend for some side effects, one of which was apparently accelerated growth. She was taller than most four-year old’s, standing at around three and half feet in height, and was built on slender muscle. The plain white jacket she was wearing doing a fairly good job of keeping her training hidden from the general public. She was dressed plainly in the jacket and blue jeans, a thick pink wool scarf wrapped around her neck more for the aesthetics than practicality. Kalasin didn’t feel the cold. Lillian was trying to train her not to feel anything.

She had Kara’s eyes, bright blue but full of life.

And she had the best smile; all cheeks and cute dimples.

To their left, a small boy pelted his fleeing father with a nerf gun causing the man to fall dramatically and fake his death.

Kalasin laughed at their antics, more for the abysmal acting than anything else, but the sound still caused the boy to look up and _stare._ The father looked too, and Kara wrapped a protective arm around her daughter pulling her close as the girl pressed her hands to her mouth.

The man offered a polite smile before pulling his son away.

Kalasin’s head dropped, lips pursed as she brought her hand over her chest and rubbed in a circle.  “I’m Sorry.  I forgot.”

Kara shook her head, tilting her kid’s head back up.  “You didn’t do anything wrong.  I like your laugh.  It’s beautiful.  _You_ are beautiful.”  She pressed her palm into Kalasin’s chest before she moved her hand over her face, signing the words to her subdued daughter.

Kalasin said nothing, only moving closer to Kara.  Little arms wrapping inhumanly tight around her neck, Kara squeezing back.  Sighing softly, she stood and brought the child to the bench.  Cradling her in her arms and just soaking in her presence.

There was so much she wanted to say but couldn’t.

An irony since Kalasin literally could not say anything.  She had been an experiment of Lillian’s.  A pet project.

Kara had no idea how long she’d been at CADMUS at that point; she’d had no way to mark the passage of time.  But she did know that whatever alterations Lillian had made to her physiology were temporary at best.  Kara usually started remembering things when left alone for more than a few days.  That constant level of alertness would not do well long term.  Lillian could use her for short term goals, but she needed someone a bit more malleable.

Someone with Kara’s strengths.

She’d successfully implanted her mutated embryo after the 5th attempt.  Kara had woken up in a pool of blood a few weeks later.

The 7th attempt had been much worse, the pain near excruciating.  She’d bitten through her lip while they’d tried to stabilize her.

The 8th had been a still born.

The 9th time had been the charm.  A beautiful little girl that they had allowed Kara to bond with.  To nurse.

Then they had tried taking her away.

Kalasin had barely been 9 months old at the time, and she hadn’t understood what was happening.  She’d screamed when they had pulled her away from her mother.

Apparently, Lillian had wanted someone with a banshee’s scream.

Lex had still been free then.  He’d yelled at the doctors for not tranquilizing the child first… and then, when he couldn’t get close enough to inject her, he’d released a Kryptonite grenade of his own making and he’d cut out her tongue.

She inhaled Kalasin’s scent again.  No matter what, she would make sure her child was safe.  She had failed her once already.  Taking the brunt of the grenade had weakened her enough that Luthor had been able to do the deed in front of her.

She’d been planning ever since.

Lillian sat next to them, pressing the watch back onto Kara’s wrist.  Little needles pierced her skin, and the device connected to her again.  An almost soothing pain washing away the loud sounds and skeleton bodies that had started to appear before her.  She sighed in relief.  She didn’t mind the watch.  When Lillian had first started the treatments, her veins would bulge green and pain would lance through her leaving her immobile for days afterwards.  Years had passed since then and with training and modifications, it was almost soothing to have the injections.  Lillian said they helped her.  That was all she needed to know.  Besides, having to deal with the watch rather than the programming?  She’d take that option any day.

Lilian handed a cone to Kalasin and Kara in turn and turned to take in the park.

“There will be a breakout tonight that will make headlines tomorrow.  My daughter will be the prime suspect.  You will defend her.  Prove her innocence, without getting anywhere near our organization.  Am I understood?”  Kara nodded, giving her cone to Kalasin who had already devoured her own.  Lillian gave her a cold look but did not interfere.  “I expect results here K-2S0.  I have protected your daughter.  You will protect mine.”

 

~*~

“Hi Dr. Barr, did my results come back ok?  I hope it’s nothing serio…”

The red heads words tapered off, her glistening fair skin paling as she stepped further into the office.

Lilu Dallas was a transfer agent from the East, a sort of token of good faith from their Russian partners; a deal that had resulted in the release of 15 Soviet Generals and 3 Russian Intelligence Officers.  The Americans had paid a hefty price for her; a weapon from birth.  She’d been trained in the arts of espionage, combat, and artillery from the time she could walk.  The fact that the Russians had let go of such an asset had raised alarms on all sides and the woman had never really been trusted among her peers.  Although, compared to what the children she’d been trained with had had to do in their own careers, Alex was pretty sure she didn’t mind.  A life at the DEO could be stressful and hard, but Hank didn’t believe in suicide missions, or needlessly harming his staff.  Wherever she had come from, Agent Dallas was now one of his own, and he treated her as such.

Which is why her betrayal was so offensive to Alex.

She hadn’t caught the name at first; when Winn had said it that night (morning?), it had barely registered.  It wouldn’t have registered for Winn either, not unless he had _really_ started digging.  Lilu’s identity was on a need to know.  Winn did not need to know.

Alex made it her business to know everything.

So, while the notoriously hard to reach Agent might’ve been hard to find for anyone else, for Alex it was child’s play.  Especially because Agent Dallas was waiting on some test results from the DEO.  End of year evals and all of that.

“Assistant Director!”  Lilu’s posture straightened, glassy eyes staring straight ahead, her hands retreating behind her back as she stood at attention.  “Apologies Ma’am, I didn’t know it was you.  I was called in by Dr. Barr’s staff Ma’am.”

“Hmm, yes.  For diarrhea, excessive discharge, sweating, nausea…  extremely random symptoms Agent Dallas.  Have you changed your diet?”  Alex was sitting at Dr. Barr’s desk, in her enclosed private office, with her feet up on the pristine wooden desk.  If the good doctor knew that Alex had swiped her patient’s file and lured her here without her consent, Alex would probably have mysteriously gotten her own case of diarrhea.  As it was, Irene Barr was on a cruise with her husband of 17 years.  Perfect opportunity.

“Umm.  No ma’am.  Not that I have noticed Ma’am.  My current assignment has given me certain … exotic exposures, but I have been taking my supplements to combat the intake ma’am.  I’ve been very careful.”

Alex studied the woman.  She was tall in stature, almost 6’ in height.  She towered over the other women in the office, but she wasn’t clumsy with it.  Her training lent her a certain amount of grace, and her looks made up for the rest.  She’d been a quiet creature from the moment Alex had met her, eyes cold and calculating; distrusting of everyone and everything.

They didn’t look like that anymore…

They hadn’t looked like that for the past three check-ins.

Love tended to melt cold hearts.

“Your symptoms are easily explained away agent.”  Alex continued, voice almost bored as she took in the sweaty skin, and the way the Agents torso and chest shuddered every so often as she tried to hold in a cough.  “Sexual intercourse between humans and Thermigarians is not considered safe for a whole slew of reasons, honestly I’m surprised you’re able to walk given the penetration.”  Lilu’s face was a bright red at this point, her jaw clenched in anger or disbelief.  Alex had never really been great with tact when it came to solving things.  She’d been able to be gentle with Kara… and then no one else until now.  Until Linda.  “Regardless, it seems you’ve figured that part out haven’t you.  Just not how to deal with the after affects.  Something you don’t seem too concerned with if your current sweaty appearance is anything to go by.  The bulky pants, rather than your normal catsuit… probably means you’re wearing a panty liner or pad of some sort.  And the abdominal cramps must be agony.”

“Ma’am,” Lilu started, “with all due respect, I’m not sure I should be discussing any of this with you.”

“Then who should you discuss it with Agent Dallas?”

The red head’s shoulders flexed, the only outward sign that she wanted to leave.  “My doctor ma’am.  Or, if you insist, Director Henshaw.  I’m not sure you have the clearance to go through my files; or make such baseless assumptions.  Given your own track record ma’am, you more than anyone should be aware that, even if we wanted to, sleeping with anyone on a job is expressly forbidden.  I’m sure ma’am, that you could even respect the reasons behind the instatement of such rules, you were after all a main contributor.”

Alex smiled, sinking back into the soft leather and re-crossing her ankles, arms folding casually against her chest.

“Is that so Agent Dallas?”

“Yes ma’am.” The woman stood firm, resolution woven into her very frame.

Alex hummed, amusement dancing in her eyes. “Well than let me be very clear about how this will play out if we do things your way. We will raise your health concerns with your doctor, who will be stumped, because let’s face it, leading expert in alien copulation she is not. She will raise her concerns to Director Henshaw, who will tell her to consult with me who _is_ the leading expert on alien _everything_ and we will be right back where we started. Just without all the privacy.”

She paused, allowing her words to sink in as the woman in front of her started to look slightly frightened.

“It will be revealed,” she continued, lowering her legs and casually rising to her feet. “That your symptoms are a direct result of an overworked Thyroid gland. Do you know what the Thyroid gland is responsible for Agent Dallas?”

Lilu swallowed, raising her shoulder to wipe at some drool at the corner of her mouth.  “It controls the endocrine system ma’am.”

“Very good.  Yes.”  Alex confirmed, rounding the table and coming to stand in front of Lilu.  “And your endocrine system is for shit.  All of your glands are overactive; mucosal, sweat, lachrymal, genitourinary…  all screaming for help.  Because your body can’t handle anymore iodine.  You didn’t change your diet… you’ve been taking your supplements… I checked your apartment, nothing out of the ordinary there… ergo, Thermigarian sexual partner.  I’m not judging Agent Dallas, but I’m gonna need you to start talking before I assume the worst.”  She paused, watching as the other woman started to outright fidget.  Alex ducked her head, forcing eye contact as she invaded Lilu’s personal space.  “You know I’m working the ALFA case.  You know that I am very good at my job.  I can only help you if you come clean now.”

“Help me?”  Lilu’s question came from between clenched teeth, her entire body tensed as if waiting for a strike.  “What could you possibly do to help me?  I’m in love with an alien, what could the DEO possibly do to help me with that?”

Alex frowned, “you talk about us like we’re evil.  Like we’re the bad guys.”

“ _You are the bad guys.”_   The hissed words were accompanied by spittle that Alex barely avoided as Lilu finally lost her iron clad self-control.  Her arms came from behind her back, gesturing hysterically at the base around them.  “How can you not see that?  To aliens, we are the bad guys.  You might not be as bad as CADMUS, but you are still _evil.”_

“We help more than we hurt.”  Alex interjected, her own body tensing as she tried to defend her organization.  “We try.  We get up every day and we—”

“Oh, please ma’am.  Respectfully speaking, that is a load of horseshit and you know it.  You lock them up and hold them indefinitely.  They have no rights, so you’re allowed….”  Lilu had found her stride now, her face going red under her sickly pallor; chin stubborn and stance tense.  “And, if they fight back?  If they dare, try to claim their freedom?  You kill them.  Without cause or hesitation.  Their families never know what happens to them, if they try to find them they’re putting their own heads on the chopping block.  You don’t understand them, so you cage them.  You study them.  You may keep your tactics “humane” but you still treat them no better than lab animals!  And you want them to think of you as heroes?  You want them to help you take down a group who, for all intents and purposes, will grant them the freedom and quality of life that you and yours have denied them all these years?  Why should they?”

“You are an agent of the United States.  You have sworn an oath.”  Alex stated, swallowing down the initial denial that had wanted to make itself known.  Because she was right.  Dallas had stated nothing but facts.

“I’ve sworn many oaths.  I never wanted to make any of them.”

Alex looked at her, a woman barely younger than herself, forced into a life she hated.  The atrocities she had undergone, the violence she had seen… it wasn’t fair.  What Alex was asking of her wasn’t fair.

She still needed to ask it.

People would die if she didn’t.

Even if all she saw standing there was a younger version of herself, hell bent on protecting Kara by any means necessary.  She hated herself just a little for what she was about to do.  But it was the only way she saw them both winning. 

“As a member of the DEO your oath was a little different.  Just as you swore to protect your country and the world from all extranormal harm, so did we swear to protect you and yours.  No matter the circumstances.  Any member of your household would have the full privileges of a citizen of the United States.  If you don’t help me now, those rights will be revoked.  You’ll be tried for treason.”

Lilu looked very tired suddenly, face drooping in resignation, even as her shoulders remained firm.  “I do not want nor need your citizenship.  It has never done me any good.  I am still just a tool to you.  Just another pawn.  The penalty for treason is death.  I’ll gladly lay my life down protecting the one good thing I have.”

Alex shook her head, sighing in exasperation.  “I’m trying to tell you that you don’t need to.  That your job here will offer you and your family protection.  That _I_ will protect you—”

“The way you protected that girl you’re always moping about?  The Kryptonian?”  Alex stilled, jaw clenching as Lilu threw her greatest failure in her face.  “You are not the only one who knows how to get access to files Agent Danvers.”

“I was a child then.”  Alex said after a few moments of gathering herself; forcing that old hurt and pain into the corners of her mind.  “I was a child, and I did not have the skills or tools available to me today.  You don’t have any reason to trust me.  But I’m asking you to anyway.”  She licked her lips, stepping even closer to the woman and showing her hands.  She was defenseless.  “For the sake of your unborn child, I am asking you to trust me.”  Lilu balked, stumbling backwards and crashing against the door.  “I can help you.  I swear to god… I _will_ help you.  I’ve got a whole network of people who would be more than willing to help you.  You will be safe.  You, your child, and your husband… wife? … spouse.  You’ll all be safe.”

Lilu’s eyes were wide, tears coming in a steady stream as wet coughs finally overtook her body.  Alex reached on the desk for the case she’d brought with her, stepping over to the red head as she sank to the floor.  The woman flinched as Alex grabbed her face, jamming a pen like object into her neck and squeezing.

A few moments later and the cough was gone, the tears dried, Lilu’s skin beginning to cool from the drying sweat.

“I’m pregnant?”

Alex nodded, hands gentle as she helped ease the other woman into a sitting position.  “I wouldn’t lie about that one.  I’d be a pretty shitty woman if I did.”

Lilu looked up at her, still trying to recover her breath, as her own natural tears started to reform.   They stared at each other for several minutes, Alex patiently waiting for reason to win in the agent’s mind.  She knew what she would have done if their positions were reversed.  She would have done _anything_ for Kara.  Anything.  Giving up a child though?  A chance to protect them both?  That kind of offer would have at least warranted some consideration.  

“Swear on your family’s life,” Lilu finally said, voice fierce, brown eyes an inferno of fear and anger. “That you will make sure we all get out of this alive; that my child will grow up with _two_ free parents.”

“I swear.”  Alex stated, gut tightening at the level of responsibility she had just taken on.  If this went the way she wanted, she’d need to speak to Hank immediately.  Clark too.  And Felicity.  She’d need all the help she could get erasing Lilu Dallas from existence, setting her up on a nice farm somewhere, maybe in the ass end of Kansas.

Lilu nodded tiredly, posture slumping in exhaustion.  “You’ve changed.  You used to be a heartless asshole.”  She stated, bending her knees and hugging them to her chest.

Alex snorted.  “So, I’ve been told.”  She paused, taking in the moment and making a mental to do list.  “I think you should take a shower Agent Dallas.  Get into some fresh clothes.  We’re gonna go grab some dinner.  Talk about this over a meal.  And then you can tell me all about the new life you’re going to build.  I’m gonna need to make some calls.”

 

~*~

As Lillian had predicted news of the breakout had crashed over CatCo like a tidal wave, and, since the escapee was one Lex Luthor, all eyes were currently on Lena.  Lena who had, in the short time Kara had known her, been nothing but kind.  She’d even drawn Siobhan up short a time or two when she had caught the other woman being especially snarky to Kara.

She didn’t deserve the attention her family’s actions had brought to her.  For that alone Kara would have helped her.

Lillian reminding her of everything she had to lose if she didn’t was un-needed but powerful motivation.

Currently Lena was sitting with Ms. Grant and the board of directors of CatCo in the conference room.  Both women wore serious expressions and every now and again one of their legal team would lean over and murmur something in their ear.

Kara and Siobhan had been banned from attending for ‘legal’ purposes.  Kara thought it was just a fancy way of taking away any moral support the women would have held.

Alex had been allowed in, and only because she hadn’t asked for permission.  No one had been willing to question her with the facial expression she’d been sporting.  Right before the door had closed between them, she’d sent Kara a small wink, face a stoic mask.

Kara had had to bite back a smile.

Feeling mildly annoyed at the whole situation, she pushed back from her desk, ignoring Siobhan’s constipated look and moving over to Winn’s desk.

“Hey,” she started, arms crossing in front of her and leaning towards her friend.  “Do you have a second?  I need your help with something.”

If it wasn’t necessary for her to leave more of a paper trail for legal purposes, she would have been happy doing her own research.  Human technology was vastly antiquated compared to what she had learned on Krypton, and she’d been off her suppressants for long enough that the knowledge was sharp in her brain.

She wondered for how long she’d be able to get away with not checking in.  The lab techs at CADMUS were really slipping, although she supposed hacking their records of her last check in hadn’t helped.  Still, trusting just computers was a silly human folly.

Since she needed this to be on the up and up, she’d need Winn to help.  

To his credit, the shorter man simply smoothed out his tie and cardigan and rose to meet her.  She led him to a deserted office in the back of CatCo, making sure that the door was shut, and they hadn’t been followed.

Well, Siobhan had followed them, but Kara could care less about her.

Once she was sure the area was secure, she turned to Winn who was looking at her expectantly in his normal black khaki’s and plaid blue button up.

“Lena is innocent.  She shouldn’t be punished for who her family is.”  To her surprise the words came out a lot more agitated than she had intended and made Winn quirk an eyebrow at her.

“While I agree about the family part,” he hedged, leaning on an old table against the far wall, “how do you know she’s innocent?  And what do you want me to do about it?”

Impatient, she scrubbed her hands over her face, and huffed out a breath.  “You’re good with computers, can’t you go through her call logs… email?  She’s got to have an alibi, right?”

Winn offered her a sympathetic look, his own arms banding around his chest.  “I can do all of those things, but I promise you, any lawyer worth their salt already has all of the records I’d be able to drag up on her.  And Lucy Lane?  Definitely a lawyer you don’t want to cross.  Ms. Grant hired her on for a reason, she’d get all of that information and more.”  Seeing the pinched look on his friend’s face, he groaned and shook his head.  “Look, the problem isn’t going to be proving that Lena was otherwise occupied during the breakout, it’s going to be proving that she wasn’t compliant; that she wasn’t in the know.”

“Ok…”  She said, nodding slowly, “how do we do that?”

Winn quirked an eyebrow.  “What do you mean we?  I just told you she has a whole defense team on this.  She doesn’t need two lowly CatCo employees.  Also, I’m not convinced she’s _not_ guilty.”

“Lena is innocent.  She wouldn’t have done this.”

“How are you so _sure_ Linda?  You barely know the woman, I know that you’re short on friends but—”

“This is not about that!”  She said, bristling at the allegation being thrown at her.

“Then what is it about?”  Winn huffed, irritation finally bleeding into his tone.  “You’re not that much of a goody two shoes to go rescuing guilty damsels Linda.  What the hell is this about?”

Kara felt her eyes burn and quickly closed them, exhaling slowly.  She was not mad at Winn.  He did not deserve to be incinerated.  She was not mad at Winn.

“Lena has 2 sealed files for child protective services.”

Winn’s eyebrows shot up and he dropped his hands to his hips.  “Yeah, so?”

“So,” Kara said slowly, still trying to calm her rage.  “They were both filed when she was in the custody of her brother, Lex.”  She paused letting the words sink in.  “I don’t know all that many people who would want to free their abusers, do you?”

Winn had closed his eyes at the new information a sad look coming over his face, but he still shook his head.  “That doesn’t mean that he—"

“Winn.”  Exasperation leaked into her voice now and she flung her arm in the general direction of the conference room.  “She needs our help.  Her family has abandoned her; she has no one.  Those people are sharks.”

“Why is that our problem?”  Winn asked, standing up straight and flinging out his own arms.

“Because!  You said foster kids have to stick together.  Lena’s technically a foster kid, she was adopted when she was 8.  She’s one of us.”  She was surprised by how true she found the words to be but unwilling to take them back now that they had been said out loud. 

The IT man’s face flushed red and he stared at her for several long moments before throwing his arms up in defeat.  “Fine.  But you’re the one who needs to do any grunt work.”

She smiled, butterflies in her stomach at her easy win.  “Deal.”

~*~

Ms. Grant’s emails were leaked the next day.

Kara had trouble keeping up with the CEO who was in rare sorts and who had ordered Kara to partner with Winn and James Olsen to go through her e-mails for anything incriminating.

So now here they were, in the spare office that they had commandeered to do their research away from prying eyes.  Winn had brought a chair in and had set up 2 laptops and a 20” monitor to work on.  He had one of the computers running searches for Lena and the other he was using to diligently go through Ms. Grant’s log by processing.  She and James had been tasked with going through the hard copies on the server, each holding a Surface device in hand and scrolling through emails.

Initially she had tried including Lena’s circumstances to their to-do list, but James had been extremely unforgiving in that respect.

It had been a lot of “Lena Luthor is a horrible human being.  You should never trust a Luthor.  Luthor’s are the scum of the Earth.  And *insert fart noise here*”

It was extremely annoying, and, rather than get into an argument with someone who took gossip and hearsay as fact, she had conceded defeat and retreated to her corner.  Winn had simply rolled his eyes and set up his stations.

It would be a long day.

It was also obvious that whoever was doing this had seen a weak spot in Ms. Grant’s armor since she had decided to stand by Lena.  It was a cheap shot and not something that Kara appreciated.  She might be taking it a little personally since she genuinely liked Ms. Grant _and_ the extra workload was infringing on her Alex time, but whatever.

They were gonna pay.

“I’m not seeing anything crazy over here.  Lots of expensive spa dates.  A $750 haircut.  Just silly stuff.  What about you?”  James’ head peeked up from his tablet and Kara frowned.  He was supposed to be working.

“Same here.  Nothing too crucial.”  Which was half true.  She’d just discovered that Cat had another son, but there was no way she was telling that to the boys.  She’d tell Cat the information was up for grabs privately, so she’d have time to prepare.

James hummed, standing from his folding chair and stretching out his spine.  “Well, I don’t know about you guys, but I could use a break.  How about some lunch?”

“Pizza for me please.”  Winn mumbled distractedly, eyes glued to the screen in front of him.

James gave him a weird look, but then shook his head and turned to Kara.  “Ok, well did you want to come with me to get it Linda?  It’s a nice day, the fresh air will help clear our heads a little.”  He gave her a charming smile, leaning back against the table and crossing his arms over his chest.

Kara pursed her lips, barely glancing at him as she continued to go through Ms. Grant’s e-mails.  This was taking forever, and she desperately wished she could use her alien skillset to speed up the process. “Umm…”  

She didn’t notice that she stopped ‘umming’ engrossed as she was in an e-mail Ms. Grant had sent to Lena about her “competent” assistant—high marks from Cat Grant—until Winn’s voice broke into her thoughts.

"What's he doing?  Why's his chest all puffed out like that?"

Kara looked up from her tablet, scrutinizing the man in front of her.  James' chest was indeed puffed out, his crossed arms only serving to pronounce the muscles in his biceps.

"He is posturing."  She stated with a frown.

"What?"  James spluttered, as he dropped his arms and tried for a more nonchalant pose.  "No, I'm not!"

"I have read about this behavior."  Kara continued taking in the awkwardness that had overcome the photographer.  "I believe you are supposed to puff out your chest now."  She turned expectant eyes to Winn, ignoring James' protests in lieu of coaching her friend through this encounter.

To her relief, Winn only scoffed.  Shaking his head in disbelief.

"Uh yeah, no thanks.  I'll pass."

She beamed.  "I think that's wise.  I thought it an odd mating mechanism when I first read about it as well.  Intimidation tactics are silly."

Winn blushed but nodded his agreement and they both turned back to James.  Now that they had decided not to take part in whatever he was trying to accomplish, it seemed prudent that he now leave.  He was nice and all, and Kara did enjoy hearing some of his stories, but right now she really needed to talk to her friend.  In private.

James' dark face was stained pink and he cleared his throat and fiddled with his tie.

“Well,” he hemmed, “I’m just going to go grab a pie… everyone good with plain?”

She and Winn locked eyes without prompting, “Yes!” 

~*~

With James gone, they could talk more about the information they were trying to dig up for Lena.  The thing was, it was extremely hard to prove that someone hadn’t done something.  Way easier to prove that someone _had_.

Which is why, when Winn came up with a hit on Ms. Grant’s attacker, Kara thought it would be a great idea to lay it all on him.  The man did after all have probable cause.

Dirk Armstrong was one of the senior board members at CatCo and he and his cronies had illegally used their credentials to allow a skilled hacker access to CatCo’s servers.  Luckily for everyone, Winn was better.

His job had even been relatively easy, if not time consuming.  They’d worked straight through to almost seven pm before he’d called it and said they’d regroup tomorrow, with James acting as their personal food boy.  

Alex had even stopped in to say goodbye before she left, giving Kara’s hand a quick squeeze and explaining that she needed to stop by her office, so she couldn’t wait around.  Kara had nodded her understanding and watched her leave wistfully.  She wished very much that her situation wasn’t so messed up.

She focused back on Winn, and the present time of ‘tomorrow’.  It was morning, and Winn was extremely overcaffeinated, his words coming out in rapid fire.

Apparently, he had used his own credentials at CatCo to force change everyone’s passwords.  User’s would be locked out of their accounts until they changed their passwords to something new.  This, he had explained in the email Kara had received at 3 AM, was to protect the company.  Password security was crucial to an enterprise environment and if Cat Grant was vulnerable, so was everyone else.  It worked like a charm, he had said, because it was true.  After security breaches it was customary to _ask_ users to change the passwords.  Winn had _forced_ them, but he said that was splitting hairs.

With everyone shutout, that meant that any login attempts made by Dirk Armstrong would be blocked, meaning he couldn’t delete any evidence.  And more importantly, he wouldn’t notice that a certain IT whiz had changed his password to gain access to his… well everything.  E-mail, PC, phone.  Winn had downloaded everything.  And boy did Dirk have some explaining to do.

The fact that he had known about Lex’s escape _seconds_ after it had happened meant that Winn was taking Kara’s claims of Lena’s innocence more seriously.

They still didn’t have solid proof, but Kara had been working in the news game long enough to know that you didn’t need proof, just a rumor.

A seed.

Winn didn’t agree.  And he had brought in the big guns.

“You _cannot_ just implicate someone in a prison escape Linda.  That’s a felony.”  Alex’s voice was patient and it only served to calm Kara down… which irritated her to no end.

“You saw the documents Alex!  There’s a very good chance he had something to do with it.”

Alex shook her head.  “A _chance_.  That’s not enough.”  Kara gave her a confused look and Alex bit her lip as she thought of how to best explain.  “You’d be ok with doing this?  Even though his children would be made vulnerable?  His husband put on the chopping block?  All so that Lena’s _reputation_ stayed intact?  She’s not facing any jail time, you do know, that right?”

“That doesn’t make it right!”  Kara closed her eyes briefly, pulling harshly at the ponytail on the back of her head.  “You told me that bad people deserve bad things, why is this different?”

Alex’s face remained persistent, her demeanor calm as she brought a hand up to Kara’s face.  “It’s different because _you_ told me we should be judged on our own merit, not on someone else’s prejudice _or,_ ” she continued, ducking her head to follow Kara when she tried to pull her face away.  “Or, on any past mistakes.  He hasn’t even had a chance to pay for his current crimes and you wanna heap this on him too?  That doesn’t seem very fair Linda.”

Kara scowled, arms crossing on her chest, a ‘humph’ sounding from her mouth.

Alex chuckled, dropping her hand and stepping back to the door where James and Winn were waiting to report to Ms. Grant.  “Work your case.  You’ll find what you need.  Might wanna look at people who _like_ Mr. Luthor though, rather than people who dislike Lena.”

And bam.

Alex had solved it.

Or rather, Lillian had.  But Alex had given her the push in the right direction to find the guy Lillian had set up to take the fall.

John Daniel Edward Torrance.  Or just Jack.

The man was a crazed anti-alien fanatic, who legitimately saw Lex Luthor as some sort of second coming.  It had been easy for Lillian to manipulate him.

And he had done the deed, the fact that he had thought he was doing it with the help of a fellow anti-alien fanatic and not Metallo meant nothing to Kara.

Someone needed to go down for this, and if she didn’t supply someone, that was Kalasin’s head.  She wouldn’t risk her daughter.  No matter how much it made her stomach turn.

The man was seriously deranged.  He probably needed a doctor more than a jail, especially with the number Lillian surely did to his brain. 

It wasn’t her business anymore.

She’d done her job.

Kally was safe.

Lena had given a warm handshake to the boys expressing her gratitude.  

Once they had left, she’d asked Kara to stay back and had pulled her into a hug in the privacy of her office, citing that she knew Kara had been behind the investigation.

Kara had blushed at the overt display of affection and mumbled a succinct “that’s what friends are for.”

Lena had given her a soft look of awe.  

“I’ve never had friends like you.”  The CEO ducked her head, brows furrowing in thought as she bit her lip.  “Come to think of it I’ve never had family like you either.  No one’s ever stood up for me like that before.”

And her voice had been so sad that Kara couldn’t help grasping the other woman’s hands and squeezing gently.  “Well now you do.”

Lena had given her a bright smile.

Kara was happy that she was happy.  Lena really was a kind soul and she deserved to have friends.  Maybe she could be one for the rest of her mission?

Lena seemed to agree as she continued, moving closer to Kara in the enclosed office space.  “What were you planning on wearing to the Holiday party?”  She asked, face still lit up with happiness.

“Oh.”  In all honesty she hadn’t really thought about it.  She was sure if she stopped in at CADMUS, they would be able to supply her with something appropriate, but she had been less than enthusiastic about going back there.  She glanced down at her current outfit, a sky-blue shirt dress with reddish brown loafers.  “I uh…”

“I thought so.  Assistants are great at taking care of their bosses, not so much themselves.  Will you let me help you?  Since we _are_ friends now?”

Kara blinked, smoothing a hand self-consciously down her front.  “I don’t know… is that… appropriate?”

Lena rolled her eyes, rounding her desk and tapping away at her keyboard.  “I’m the CEO of a multi-billion-dollar company Linda, I decide propriety.  Besides, you don’t actually work for me.  This is just one friend helping another friend get her girl.  Even if her girl is the human version of grumpy cat.”  Kara flushed red, incoherent sounds coming out of her mouth at the blasé statement.  And honestly, also trying to decide if she should be offended or amused at Lena’s description of Alex.  Lena smiled, glancing up at her with mischief dancing in her eyes.  “Don’t worry, I won’t say anything.  But for what it’s worth, I think you two might look cute together...  You know, if your Agent ever decided to smile.”

Kara’s mouth open, passionate denial all ready to go when she saw the mirth on Lena’s face.  She had seen that look on Winn before.

“You’re teasing me.”

“Yes.”  Lena confirmed, swiveling her computer screen to Kara’s view.  “And you are going to stun that woman right out of her shoes.”

All in all, it had been a good day.

Lena Luthor turned out to be nothing like her family; she was smart sure, but she was also kind and funny and patient.  Kara really liked her.

Gaining a new friend had been an exciting experience.

The smug smile Alex had given her when they’d passed the information on to Lucy Lane—a short, fierce, _beautiful_ woman—the agent’s expression screaming “I told you so”— well… that was just icing on the cake.

 

~*~

As it turned out, Lilu _was_ sleeping with a Thermigarian.  A male Thermigarian.  Alex sighed, rubbing at the sides of her nose as she tried to process everything she had learned.

Nokilami was one of the first Thermigarians that ALFA had recruited to their cause.  He had been dead set on hating humans; on blaming them for his current status in life, on the fact that his family had been forced to live like scavengers just to survive.  He’d been full of all of the anger and hatred youth and bigotry could afford him.

And then the killings had started.

According to Lilu, when ALFA had started it had just been a group of angry aliens ranting and letting off some steam.  But then, as with all things, someone had gotten a bright idea… and it had stuck.  Nokilami, or Noki as Lilu called him, had joined up with the idea that he would be able to evoke change.  That his thoughts and ideas would be able to help shape a better future for him and all the aliens he had found himself surrounded by.  Unfortunately, that had not been true.

The Thermigarians were seen as ‘soft’ in the ALFA army.  They were used, as Alex had suspected, for intimidation tactics and surveillance.  And treated like dumb guard dogs.

The entire group had refused to physically harm anyone, but their pack mentality meant that they went with their tribe.  If even one Thermigarian was involved, then they would all need to stay.  The fact that the human riots and fear mongering were getting worse also did not help matters.

Lilu had also told her that, while she did not know ALFA’s exact plans, she knew that the reason they were so interested in Cat Grant was access to her satellites.  Apparently, ALFA had made a deal with one Maxwell Lord for access to his satellites, a deal he had readily signed off on.

To be fair, Lord was unaware that he had made such a deal; the greedy CEO of Lord Technologies had granted access to his satellite network to a small country in Asia called Brunei.  In 1971 there had been a mysterious siting over the Island of Borneo of a UFO; a few months later the Sultan had been in talks with the UK for the countries independence.  There had been rumors of a trade deal, but never any evidence of what had been traded.

Noki had confirmed that Brunei had traded liquid Vibranium.  A near indestructible metal, alien in nature, and something that every government in the world would sell their country for. Lord had sold his morals.

Given the current state of the controversial country Alex wasn’t surprised to learn that they were one of the main supporters of the ALFA group. Tit for tat.

They helped ALFA fly under the radar, and whoever had been in that space craft gave them access to stores of Vibranium to trade.

“This is way above my paygrade.”  Maggie said, slouching over the bar and swirling her tumbler of amber liquid.  “We’re talking… I mean what is international treason called?  Is it called international treason?  Cause that’s what this feels like.  I mean, I figured humans were helping to some extent but whole _countries_?  I mean come on.  Weird, tree hugger hippies I can understand—they tend to go for causes that support the little guy—but actual world governments?  Can the DEO even go toe to toe with a country?  How does this work—”

Alex grabbed her arm, shaking gently to quiet the flow of questions streaming out of her mouth.  

“Calm down.”  

They were at Alex’s apartment, it was barely past 5 on Thursday evening but Alex could hardly fault Maggie for drinking after what she had told her.  She had a feeling Felicity was partaking in about three different types of red wine at the moment.  While she had spoken to Lilu on a Sunday, corroborating her story and building her own connections had taken a few days.  She hadn’t wanted to go to her team half assed; she’d wanted to have as much information as possible.

“ _It’s called Crimes Against Humanity Mags, and it carries some serious consequences.  The thing will be to prove it_.”  Felicity was on Skype this time, her and Winn on a split screen on Alex’s laptop as they worked on Lilu’s documents.

“ _I’ve already started a scan of all of Brunei’s finance’s, trade deals, government meetings… everything I could think of.  They can’t be alone in this.  Brunei is tiny, they can’t be funding this whole thing.  If we’re being stereotypical, path of least resistance and all that, I think it would be safe to assume that any country that’s suddenly found it’s stride in the last three decades might be worth looking into.”_ Winn was glaring down at his laptop screen, hands moving maniacally over his keyboard.  Thankfully he wasn’t on his desktop.  He’d opted for the noisiest keyboard he could have possibly found in Alex’s opinion.  He claimed it had ‘character’… then he’d laughed at his stupid pun.

Alex nodded, rolling her own glass of water between her palms.  Eye’s on the wall behind Maggie’s head, littered with the images that Linda had posted for her.  When she’d told Maggie, that Linda had given her their first real lead, the detective had cocked her head to the side and nodded.

That was it.

“I think you’re right.”  She confirmed, grabbing the bottle of whiskey from Maggie before she could pour another glass.  She may not begrudge the detective drinking, but the smell was starting to become way more than tempting.  Staying sober sucked.  She walked over the sink, ignoring Maggie’s slight whimper as she dumped the rest of the booze down the drain.  “Let’s look at war torn countries as well. If Alfa is recruiting in poor neighborhoods, it makes sense that they’re gonna be recruiting in poorer countries as well.”

Alex was at least glad that her mother had taken one look at the seriousness of her and Maggie’s faces and decided that she and Linda should have a nice evening at the Spa.  Cat Grant’s Holiday Fundraiser was tomorrow, the day before Christmas Eve, and she wanted the young assistant to be spry.  Eliza had booked the overnight brunch package, and, while Alex was sure Linda would be able to sneak out, she was hoping Linda didn’t tell her that they’d be sneaking to an alien refugee camp.

Eliza’s constant worry would seriously cramp Alex’s style.

Alex was still unsure of why the blonde insisted they go back to the camp at night, but she was willing to look past the weirdness to solve the case… and maybe also kind of to spend some time with Linda.  She hadn’t spent any time with her since they’d parted ways at the alien bar and she was starting to feel the symptoms of Linda withdrawal.

“ _Already done compadre.  Lilu’s documents are printing as we speak.  She and Niko should enjoy a nice secluded life in the mountainous ranges of none ya!  I also sent the blueprints of the location to your phones.  Maggie try to make sure this klutz doesn’t get herself killed pleased?  She’s got two left feet when she’s in love.”_

Maggie barked out a laugh at Felicity’s words, swiping on her phones screen to pull up the blueprints.  “How would you know?  Danvers hiding a secret love child I don’t know about?  I thought this was her first go down lover’s lane.”

“I am right here.”

“ _It is.”_ Felicity confirmed, completely ignoring Alex’s protests.  “ _But when we were younger I used to make up all these scenarios of what my BFF would be like when she was twitterpated.  One of my favorite ones was her klutzing out into a garbage can like in Mean Girls…. Maybe we could push her?”_

The expression on Maggie’s face turned thoughtful and Alex could almost _see_ the plan forming in her mind.  “Guys!  Seriously!  We’re working.  You are not pushing me into a garbage can to fulfill some weirdo fantasy you have of me being in love.  Are there any security flaws we should be aware of?”

“ _Spoilsport!  It’s in a seedy part of town so the building looks decrepit.  Good thing is that it looks like it has sewer access.  Means you might be a little smelly for your date though.”_

Alex rolled her eyes, ignoring the comments from her best friend and moving back towards the island bar and in front of the computer screen.

“Winn, do you think you’ll be able to walk us in with thermodynamics?”

“ _I can.  You’ll need to grab a Black graded comm unit from the DEO if you don’t have one.  It’ll keep us connected no problem...  The closer I am the better the quality, so I might—”_

“No.”  Alex interrupted, prompting the man to look up from his screen and into the camera.  Alex clenched her jaw, trying to think on how best to communicate her thoughts.  “No dice Winn.  We have no idea what we’re walking into, and this is recon only.  I want you as far away as possible.  Can you do this from your apartment?”

Winn studied her for a moment, a contemplative look on his face.  “ _No, too far_.”  He finally murmured, “ _although maybe if I drive_ —”

“No.” Alex repeated, hands clenching at the lingering smell of whiskey that was still in the air.  “I’m not risking you on this.”

“ _But you could risk me when there was an actual horde of killer aliens?  That was ok_?”  The tech genius threw up his hands, video going blurry at the sudden agitated movements.  “ _Nice to know where your priorities are.”_

Alex felt her nostrils flare and fought to keep her irritation in check.  Beside her Maggie had gone silent, and Felicity was studiously staring at something off screen.

“I made a bad call.  I risked you on a bad call and I got _very_ lucky.”  Winn made a disinterested sound and Alex felt all the fight leave her body.  She didn’t know what to do anymore.  Winn was one of her closest friends and the thought that she might lose him… “They didn’t have a body—when they told us my dad was dead—there was no body.  He was just gone.  Mercado’s family is going to have to live that for the required decontamination period before they even get to have a real funeral.  I… it set me off.”  She swallowed harshly, avoiding all eye contact and she stared down at her hands.  “I make bad decisions Winn, when it comes to my dad and … and _Kara_.”  The name almost got stuck in her throat, but she pushed on.  “I make bad decisions.  I don’t mean to, and I can’t promise it won’t happen again but …. You don’t need to take this risk.  This isn’t me being an asshole, I just need you safe.  I always need you safe.  I’m sorry if I ever made you feel like I didn’t.” 

No one said anything for several minutes and Alex took to picking at her nail beds.  She really wanted a drink, it would help take the edge off.  Maggie’s hand covered her own, squeezing gently.

“ _There’s a Starbucks about 10 blocks away from your point of entry.  It’s 2 blocks from a police station and another 4 from the train… I’ll be able to get an Uber easily.  I can work from there, minimal risk_.”

Alex looked up, throat working as she nodded, unable to form words passed the frog in her throat.  Maggie’s hand remained tight around hers.

There was another pause as Winn seemed to collect himself, resuming his seat and beginning to type again.  “ _If I leave now, we should be able to start in 20.  The app is to send a red alert to Hank if anything goes wrong.  It’ll give him your last known location and activate a tracker I installed in your watch…  I need you safe too Alex.”_

Her eyes stung, and her throat was almost painful at this point, hating the swell of emotion that had overtaken her at this conversation.  God, she was getting soft.

“ _Aww.  You guys are the cutest friends ever!  Curtis!  Say something sweet to me_!”

“ _Felicity, are you sitting on the f5 key?  Because that ass is refreshing_.”  Curtis said from somewhere in the abyss.  Felicity blushed scarlet and giggled hysterically, booing along with Winn at the lame backhanded compliment.

Alex really really loved her friends.

~*~

Nervous energy flittered through Kara’s stomach.  This was a bit more than she had really anticipated and she was not above admitting that she had maybe bit off more than she could chew.

Eliza Danvers was after all a formidable woman.

She was Alex’s _mom_ for Rao’s sake.  And, ok.  Maybe she hadn’t really thought of it all that much before but than Alex had pointed it out and Kara suddenly found herself overwhelmed with nerves at the thought that maybe Eliza _wouldn’t_ like her.

She’d never had to worry about something so trivial in her life.

But the woman she was currently walking towards, who was dressed in white linen pants and a sky-blue blouse, had the power to shut down whatever progress Kara had made when it came to Alex’s relationship.

She didn’t think she _would_ but the fact that she _could_ was still enough to get Kara’s heart racing.

This was terrible.

She offered the older woman a tight smile, knowing that she couldn’t pull off charming at the moment and opting to be honest instead.

Eliza looked like someone who appreciated honesty.

“I like Alex.”

She closed her eyes as mortification overcame every other sense in her body.  Not that honest.  She did not have to be that honest!

“I am _so_ sorry.”  She said after an awkward silence had stretched on for a tad too long.  She reopened her eyes, trying to look at Eliza without _looking_ at her.  “That was…  I meant to say hello.  I am nervous.  Obviously.  Nervous.”

Rao just shoot her.

“Linda.”  Eliza rested a hand on her forearm and waited for Kara to look at her.  Finally, managing to meet Eliza’s eyes Kara saw nothing but fond amusement on her features.  “Alex likes you too, there’s nothing to be worried about.  She’ll figure it out eventually and then the two of you can have an adult relationship.”  She paused, and her eyes hardened, fingers tightening slightly on Kara’s arm.  “No one-night stands though—or casual… anything.  Alex deserves more than that yes?”

Kara’s head bobbed rapidly in her affirmation.

“Yes ma’am.”

Eliza’s features softened again, and she squeezed Kara gently before releasing her arm.

“Good girl, but please it’s Eliza.  I’m pretty sure we’re going to be family one day, so we might as well get used to first names now, yes?”

Kara’s face had never felt so hot in her entire life.

Despite her obvious embarrassment she found herself smiling at Eliza’s words.  She allowed herself to entertain the idea of being a part of Eliza’s family, no matter how hopeless that dream might be.

It was still a nice thought.  Especially given that she was probably more than a little in love with the woman’s daughter.

“Yes ma—Eliza.”

The older woman smiled and hooked their arms together.  “Good.  Now, how about we begin our relaxing spa date with some dinner hm?”

And ok, maybe Kara was a little in love with Alex’s mom too.

~*~

 

The address that Lilu had given them led them to, as Felicity had accurately described, a seedier part of town.  It was easy finding the manhole in the alley, like something straight out of a movie.  Rats and all.

Walking through the sewer, Maggie bringing up the rear and flashlights braced over their gun hands, turned out to be as gross as Alex had thought it would be.  It smelled like shit.  Like days old, burned and regurgitated, sweated off, garbage eaten shit.

Her gag reflex was threatening to choke the life from her.  The coverings on her nostrils doing absolutely nothing to stem the smell.

“ _You’re coming up on a ladder now.  When you get to the top, you have a guard to the right and another around the left-hand corner.  According to thermal, they’re both stationary—you should be able to take them out easy.  That should leave you free to listen from the balcony_.”  Winn said, voice tinny through her earpiece.

She saw the ladder to her right and pointed with her chin.  Maggie nodded to show she’d seen it and Alex began her ascent, moving slowly and carefully as she tried to remain as quiet as possible.

When she reached the top, she made a jerking motion with her hand and Maggie nodded again, jerking her head to the left.

Easy.  Alex had the one of the right, Maggie would take the one on the left.

She reached into the pocket on her tac vest, holstering her gun and slowly easing the trap door up an inch.  She waited patiently, her muscles locked in place until she saw the shadow of a pant leg come into view.  Quickly, she pressed a button on the pen sized tranq gun in her hand. Simultaneously, she leapt out of the hole and caught the man as he started to sway, watching in satisfaction as Dummy number 1 went down for the account.  Easily.  Soundlessly.

ALFA should really invest in better thugs.

Peering down the length of the wall to make sure no one else was around, Alex gestured to Maggie that the coast was clear before the detective continued to make her way up.  She stayed low, crouching as she turned to the right, gun back in hand as she cleared her area.  A few seconds later and a slight grunt told her Maggie had taken down thug 2.

She felt a slight tap on her shoulder and held up her fist, signaling Maggie to wait before creeping forward to the take in the scene below.

They were in a warehouse on the sublevel, the stone walls damp from being so close to the sewer.  She and Maggie were on a balcony, the grates beneath their feet red in color, matching the bars meant to be used for safety.  The room they were in looked like it was used for some sort of storage facility, multiple shipping containers taking up the area.

After once again making sure the area was clear she motioned Maggie forward, the black coloring of their tac gear allowing them to blend in to the shadier corners of the ill lit premises.  She leaned forward, eyes alert as she pressed the button on her chest to open her comms to Winn again.

“We’re in position.  Waiting for our targets.”

“ _They should be to you shortly.”_ Winn responded.  “ _Thermal has them about 2 rooms away.”_

Maggie took position next to her, body lateral to their exits as Alex threw a listening device down below.  The machine stuck to the top of a container about 5 feet away, another following shortly after on the opposite end of the room.

“Feeds are in place.”

And then they waited.

“ _The cargo you requested is in the truck outside.  We will proceed with our plans as discussed.  I trust your leader has called off her lapdog.”_

She heard the voices before she saw them, a male of unknown species entering.  Alex couldn’t accurately describe him except to say that he was tall.

And green.

The alien looked like something straight out of a Steven Spielberg movie, and it was dressed in a long navy robe.  Walking next to him was a group of what Alex assumed to be humans.

“Ms. Luthor has contained K-2SO for the time being.  Our asset will be engaged in other activities and has been programmed to not engage for this time.  You will be free to move as you please.  Within reason.”

Alex frowned, confusion marring her features.  That voice was familiar.

“Winn,” she whispered, lips barely moving.  “Run a voice ID.”

“ _Affirmative_.”

“Our paths have not yet diverged.”  The alien was saying, moving steadily toward the large garage style doors at the other end of the hall.  As they drew closer Alex tapped at her body cam, trying to make sure she had a good angle for when the humans came into sight.  “We will proceed as allies for the time being.

“That is good to hear.” The man said, finally coming close enough that Alex saw his face.  Her heart stopped.  “Metallo will be at your disposal for your operation.  Please have him returned functional.”

“ _Voice ID confirmed.  It’s… Alex…”_ Winn’s voice trailed off for a moment, obviously as bewildered as Alex herself.  That feeling didn’t last long in either of them _.  “Maggie get her out of there.  Abort the mission.  Get her out.”_

Movement next to her awoke her muscles with startling fury.  Maggie had her by the arm before she could leap off the balcony.  She held back a snarl, fist lashing out to throw the Latina off of her.

“Danvers!”  Maggie hissed, catching her arm and pressing her against the wall.  She leaned in close so that she didn’t have to raise her voice above a whisper, a stupid move since it put her dangerously close to Alex’s head.  “I am getting married.  I _want_ to get married.”

A beat of tension filled silence followed.

Alex sagged, and Maggie breathed a sigh of relief.  Grabbing her by the front of her tac vest and pulling her back out the way they came.  Alex remained pliable in her grasp, not saying a word.  Unable to think past what she had just seen.

She’d never felt more foolish in her life.

Despite every rationalization her mind tried to make she knew what she had seen.  There was no mistake.  This wasn’t her imagination.  There was no evil doppelganger.  

“Danvers.”  Maggie called to her when they were finally back on the street.  “Danvers.  What do you need?”

Alex stared through her, slowly pulling off her headset, and stashing her gun.  “Do not follow me.”

Maggie swallowed and nodded slowly.  “I can only promise that if you swear to me you’re not going to go after these guys alone or halfcocked.  We regroup with Hank and then we move from there.  Promise.”

Alex nodded.  “I promise.”

And she meant it.  She had no plans to go after anyone tonight.

Tonight, she was going to get very drunk.

She didn’t care about any stupid plans of sobriety.  She wanted to forget _everything._

Especially the face of Jeremiah Danvers making deals with ALFA members.

~*~

Alex pummeled the Mook Yan Jong in the corner of her apartment, sending every ounce of anger and rage into the wooden practice dummy.  Oliver would have told her to calm down, to do her breathing exercises, but she was too far gone.  She pulled away briefly, breaths coming in harsh pants as she took a swig from the bottle of bourbon she had purchased.  The alcohol clouded her mind, leaving everything just a bit fuzzy around the edges; softer somehow.  She planted her hands on the handles, closing her eyes momentarily to center herself before launching back into action.  

_Raka-tak._

_Taka._

_Raka-tak._

The sounds of flesh colliding with wood echoed through her apartment.  Alex focused on those sounds, seeing her father's face before her, fury building.

And then she heard another sound.  One that wasn't nearly as violent as the ones she was making.

She paused, taking another pull from the bottle on her left, sweat dripping off her bare torso and soaking through her green sports bra.

"Alex?"

Linda.  What the hell was she doing here?

Another knock.  "Alex?  I can hear you in there… you said you wanted to go see Ni remember?"

Yes.  She did.

Another pull from the bottle.

Another, softer knock.

Anger filled her, unfettered and irrational.  She shouldn't be here.  Alex didn't _want_ her here.

She ripped the door open, bottle still in hand and glared at a frozen Linda Taylor staring numbly in her doorway, body poised as if to walk away.

"Our plans are cancelled."  She growled, nails digging into the wood of her door as she moved to close it.  Linda slamming her hand on the opposite surface stopped the motion.  Alex saw red.  "What the hell do you think you're doing?  Get the fuck off my door!"

"I just--" the blonde swallowed, body fidgeting as if she wasn't quite sure what to do with herself.  "You don't seem like yourself… did something happen?   Or…"

Her voice trailed off and Alex laughed sardonically, releasing the door and pulling the bottle back to her lips.  She'd just tasted the slightly smoky flavor when the bottle was pulled from her grasp.  She blinked, Linda staring at her from outside the apartment doing a great impression of an owl.

Alex scoffed, she could have it.

Retreating back into her apartment, she pulled open her fridge grabbing for her next bottle before that too was taken and Linda was blocking her entry to the appliance.

"Alex--"

The brunette shoved her to no avail, anger clouding her judgement and making her do it again.

She wanted booze, Linda was blocking the booze, she needed to move her the hell out of the way.

Alex--"

The third shove made Linda lose her grip on the original bottle and it fell to the floor and shattered.  The sound of breaking glass finally penetrating the fog of rage that Alex had fallen into.

The fuck was she doing?  She looked from the mess on her floor, to a guilt-stricken Linda.  She'd put hands on her.  She'd…

"Alex… I'm s…so sorry.  I'll r-replace it.  I just-- you s…sh—shouldn't be drinking.  You told me you don't dr—drink anymore."  Seeing the non-reaction that Alex was currently giving Linda stepped closer, placing the other bottle on the counter and tentatively reaching out to touch Alex's arm.  "What happened?"

The question pushed her father's face back into her mind.  Her dad smiling as he threw her onto his shoulders after her science fair; her dad smiling at a cage full of aliens and seemingly agreeing to a price.

She didn't want to think about that.  That was the last thing she wanted--

Fine.  If she couldn't have alcohol she'd have the next best thing.  

She grabbed her jacket, pulling her arm through her sleeve as she made her way towards the door.  She'd go to the bar on 5th.  Jessie usually worked nights, and she'd never really said no to Alex before.  It'd be easy.  Alex needed easy right now.

Linda was body blocking the door.  

This was getting annoying.

"Move."

"No."  The blonde breathed.  "Not until you tell me what's going on."

"Move."

"No."  There were tears in her eyes now and it only made Alex more irritated.

"Linda!"  She finally yelled in frustration, body bristling with energy as she almost paced in front of the hapless blonde.  "Get the fuck out of my way!"

"No, Alex…"  Linda's hand grabbed at hers, tugging her minutely closer as the other landed on her neck.  "Whatever it is we can figure it out.  You shouldn't be alone right now; not when you're like this.  You should be around people who care--"

Her words were swallowed by Alex's lips, the brunette positively devouring her mouth as the blonde let out a helpless whimper and sagged against the door behind her.

Alex growled low in her throat at the obvious submission, a swell of arousal hitting her hard in her abdomen as she held the blonde's head steady.  She licked into Linda's pliant mouth, tongue sweeping over teeth and soothing sharp nips she delivered to her friend's plump lower lip.  The sounds the other woman was making only spurring her on.

A primal desire to claim surged through her as she trailed kisses from Linda's lips, over the curve of her jaw, to her neck sucking at her pulse point.  She pulled a sharp cry from panting lips, Linda's hands clenching at her waist as Alex's busied themselves by discarding articles of clothing.

It wasn't until she had Linda's shirt off, sharp bite marks prominent on the skin of her neck and chest as the blonde moaned into her mouth, that Alex paused.  Some sane part of her regaining control as she remembered _who_ exactly she was doing this with.  This was _Linda._ This wasn't some…

“Do you want this?"  She asked breathlessly, unable to stop kissing the woman, hands trailing over a trembling rib cage.  Pure _need_ coursing through her being.  "Linda, do you want me?"  She forced herself to stop, to pull away so that she could read her friend's face when she answered.

 Chocolate eyes blinked back at her dazedly.  Linda licked her lips, panting, and Alex 's eyes darted from her lips to her chest, back to her face.  Beautiful.  The woman was perfection.

 "Yes…"  A husky voice drew her from her appreciations and Alex focused back on the warmth coming from Linda's eyes.  "I want…  Alex… I don't know how…  I've never--"

 Alex kissed her again.  She didn't want to hear it.  Couldn't hear it, forced herself to ignore it, her hands reaching behind Linda for the clasp of her bra.  The metal clasps dug into her fingers, and Alex pulled Linda more firmly to her chest, walking backwards towards her bedroom.  The blonde stumbled slightly at the change of direction, but gave as good as she got, her hands now gaining confidence as they stroked over Alex's skin.

By the time they reached the bed, Alex had already started tugging down the zipper of the gray slacks at Linda's hips.  She must not have gone home after Catco.  Must have gone to Eliza straight from work Alex thought as the pants pooled at Linda's ankles, leaving her in simple but adorable Hufflepuff underwear.  If Alex hadn't been stone drunk she would have laughed, as it was she moved her hand over the front of the panties, tracing the design before dipping lower, drawing a moan from her counterpart.

The blonde pulled against her, twisting slightly in her arms to flick on the light.  Alex blinked at the sudden brightness before refocusing on the woman in front of her.  Linda's chest was heaving, hands pulling at Alex, dropping down her back to the curve of her ass.  Slight imperfections on the blonde's skin almost gave her pause, but then Linda was sucking at her neck, licking a trail to her ear and pulling the lobe between her lips.

She couldn't stop the whine that emerged from her throat, instead wrapped one arm firmly around Linda's waist as the blonde trembled.  She pulled her head back enough that she could see Linda's face, her other hand stroking softly over the material of her panties as she watched the woman slowly fall apart.

Beautiful, she was so beautiful.

And then Linda was tugging on Alex's own bra, pulling the sweat soaked garment over her head and latching her lips to the brunettes aching nipple.  She gasped, her body arching into the contact and making her press more firmly on the cloth covered crotch.

Linda cried out, hips jerking, and Alex took the brief distraction as an opportunity to push her down onto the bed.  She quickly pulled off her own pants and underwear before divesting Linda of her last covering, licking her lips at the bare sex that was revealed to her.

Linda was staring up at her wide eyed and shaking when Alex climbed into her lap, hands delving into a mane of yellow as she tugged Linda up into a searing kiss.  She moaned at the contact, feeling her own thighs quiver in anticipation, her hips jogging, the haze of the alcohol numbing her to everything but the feel of the woman in her arms.

Linda's hands clenched on her shoulders before trailing down her spine.  She brought her left hand to Alex's front, tentatively squeezing her breasts, her thumb stroking over a pebbled nipple.  

"Fuck."  Alex breathed, unable to stop the jogging motion of her waist as a bolt of pure electricity shot to her groin.  "Fuck Linda."

The blonde took advantage of her now free lips, to mouth down Alex's throat, pausing when she came to the brunette’s collar bones.

"Alex…" She breathed the name as if in prayer, lips pressing reverently over the brunette's heart.

 Alex moaned, hearing her name said like that bringing unwanted feelings to the forefront of her mind.   She pulled the blonde's hair in retaliation, forcing her down on her back as she brought her hand to the woman's heated sex.

 _God._ She felt like pure silk.

The urge to _claim_ returned, prompting Alex to bite down the smooth expanse of Linda's neck to her breasts.  She caressed the pliant flesh with lips and teeth, fingers pulling gently as they trailed down Linda's abdomen.  Her hands encountered uneven ridges and if she were coherent she would have questioned them.  As it was she had only one goal in mind, and Linda was a quivering mess by the time she'd managed to situate herself between the blonde's thighs.; pulling her legs over her shoulders.  She inhaled, nosing along the light blonde fuzz that coated Linda's skin before swiping with her tongue.  

It didn't take long, Alex had had years to perfect this.  And now she was using this, her one real skill to utterly consume the woman of her dreams.

Linda's hips bucked almost violently, the bed creaking as she rode out her orgasm.  And Alex didn't stop there, continuing to suck and lick at the woman's clit, fingers stroking roughly inside of her lover.

After all she'd fucked every other good thing in her life… what was one more?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 0.0
> 
> So.... that happened. 
> 
> Don't be mad at Alex, she's gonna be pissed enough with herself. Don't drink and fornicate children, it doesn't always lead to the best experiences. Make good choices and all that.
> 
> Anyway, lets go through it shall we?
> 
> So, Alex knows (or at least assumes) that our dear Linda is an Alien. Still doesn't know what kind, but she's finally starting to pay attention. Yay sobriety.
> 
> Alex and Winn finally made up! Yay! I've been waiting forever to get to this part. Jeez. More Winn and Alex hijinks will ensue. TBC.
> 
> We're finally making progress on this damn ALFA case, which is taking them 5ever to figure out. Probably because Alex has been distracted by Kara's awesomeness and vice versa.
> 
> And we're seeing more about what's going on with Kara as well. Also, for clarification: K-2SO is from Star Wars. He's the robot from Rogue One Star Wars and is now the way I designate Kryptonians. 
> 
> What'd you guys think of Kalasin? I hope I portrayed her correctly but she is nonverbal. My brother's godfather is nonverbal and I based the way I wrote sign language off of how he communicates. Hope that came across well. She was slightly inspired by the Avoxes from the Hunger Games. Wanted to draw the comparison of how dire the circumstances were and The Hunger Games seemed like a good way to do so.
> 
> Then we had Jeremiah Danvers... who saw that one coming? We're going into the dark realms here people, so buckle up! 
> 
> I think Alex handled that as well as could be expected. Better actually since Maggie survived the encounter, lol.
> 
> But then we have Kara. Poor sweet Kara... Wrong! She's an adult. She'll survive... plus it'll all work out in the end. Promise.
> 
> Also, anyone see the last episode of Supergirl? James has now joined Trish on my "shittiest friends" list. Grrrr.


	12. I Know Where I Belong (and nothing’s gonna happen)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Previously on YWLM:
> 
> Alex finally starts piecing together the clues and realizes the object of her affections may not be completely human, whilst also being mercilessly teased by Winn and Felicity.
> 
> Winn gives her a name after he and Felicity play COD, the game that might actually be an ALFA recruitment center.
> 
> Kara meanwhile is asked to meet up with Lillian who allows her a few moments with her daughter Kalasin. We learn that Lex Luthor is truly the most evil and vile of creatures as he has rendered the toddler a mute. Lillian re-ups Kara's kryptonite in her watch and tells her to keep Lena out of jail.
> 
> Kara seeks out Winn's help and together with him and James they clear both Ms. Grant and Lena of any and all wrong doings.
> 
> Minor appearance by Lucy Lane.
> 
> Lena and Kara strike up a friendship cause who wouldn't?
> 
> Alex follows Winn's lead to a fellow agent and finds out that ALFA is a lot larger than she thought. She and Maggie team up to survey a site and stumble upon Jeremiah Danvers, alive and well.
> 
> Alex gets stupid drunk; Kara tells Eliza she likes Alex; and then mistakes were made.
> 
> Dun dun dunnnn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These chapters are getting long, wondering if they're a deterrent to anyone... let me know.
> 
> So I'm actually on schedule again. Yay! Sorry I've been silent on the comments. I read all of them and you guys have no idea how amazing and inspired your words make me feel. Thank you. I promise to get to them soon, I just need to carve out some quiet time in my currently hectic life. This site has become my safe place and you are all awesome.
> 
> Song is from a FF9 video I saw once. Well it's not from there but that's where I first heard it. According to a lyrics search I am incorrect but that's what I heard and so it is what I shall write!
> 
> Tal Bachman- She's So High.
> 
> Beta'd by Keziah, thanks for getting me back on track. You're the true MVP.

I Know Where I Belong (and nothing’s gonna happen)

Linda was beautiful.

And Alex was now one hundred percent sure that she was falling hard for this woman.

And that she had royally fucked up.

She lay in her bed, thick blankets cocooning her in the warmth provided by the mattress and Linda’s body heat. The blonde was stretched out on her stomach with her hands under the pillow her head was resting on. Thick blonde hair curled around her, obscuring some of her face from Alex’s eyes.

That didn’t stop Alex from taking in the sight greedily, unable to pull her attention from the enchantress in her bed. The pouty lips just parted; bare shoulders, skin reddened in some places from Alex’s fingers and mouth. Her hand wandered up of its own accord, gently pushing some hair away from the sleeping face on display for her. Linda sighed, shifting slightly but showing no signs of awakening.

Alex didn’t blame her. Their activities had been… grueling. And, since she was pretty sure that had just been Linda’s first time—at least with a woman— it was no wonder that the blonde was tired.

Alex had been unable to sleep. Guilt and shame warring within her as the adrenaline forced the alcohol from her system. When she’d sobered up and realized what she was doing… who she was doing it to… it had already been too late.

She’d used her. Had taken her like it had been nothing; like _she’d_ been nothing.

She’d fucked one of the best things that had ever happened to her. Literally.

Nothing she did would ever make up for that.

Linda had fallen asleep curled around her, eyes blinking blearily as Alex—finally aware of herself— had wrapped her up in blankets, pressing gentle kisses to her face to lull her to sleep. She’d made a noise of protest when Alex had moved to turn off the light, so she’d curled back around her, holding on tight as Linda lost herself in dreams.

Alex hoped they were happy ones.

Linda deserved to be happy; even if Alex had just proven that she was probably the last person she should seek that happiness with.

Unable to bear her sins any longer Alex found herself on her back staring at her ceiling.

Her father was alive.

Her father was working with ALFA.

Her father was making deals on behalf of Lillian Luther, leader of the rogue government agency, CADMUS.

She’d thought him dead for the better part of 9 years.

And all that time he’d just…

…

…

What?

Left his entire family?

A nauseating thought came to her and she had to sit up, fingers clenching in her hair as she tried to make sense of the last twenty-four hours.

Had her father had something to do with Kara’s disappearance?

He’d left. Disappeared without a word.

And then suddenly men in tac uniforms had shown up looking for an alien.

Alex had always thought that someone had gone after her entire family; not that her father had changed sides.

She pressed her lips together, unwilling to wake Linda up with the force of the sobs that wanted to escape.

It made no _sense._

Her father had been the one to convince _Eliza_ to let them take Kara in. Had been the one to reach out to his friends in the NSA and forge documents for her.

Why would he have turned on them with no warning? Why would he throw in with _CADMUS_ of all people?

He was her _dad._ What the hell had happened to him? What had she missed?

Why was he doing this?

Linda made a soft sound next to her, hunching in on herself, brow crinkling adorably.

Alex felt the first tear fall and threw the covers off herself.

She couldn’t do this.

Couldn’t bear to stay and witness the destruction she had caused.

Couldn’t hold in her emotions here of all places.

She was dressed in record time, had grabbed her keys and wallet when she finally paused in the doorway. Linda was so beautiful.

She hated herself for fucking this up.

She wanted another drink.

Alex left her apartment in sweats, a t-shirt, and her leather jacket. She was clearly unkempt, hadn’t even bothered to look in the mirror when she left but she was sure there were hickies left over from last night’s excursions. Luckily, Linda had seemed more interested in her collar and shoulders then her actual neck.

Hank would have had her head.

She hadn’t been sure where she was going, although to be honest, she _had_ thought of driving her bike straight to a bar and staying there until they kicked her out.

But she didn’t want to be drunk again. She’d physically _pushed_ Linda last night, and then had pretty much stolen the woman’s virginity. All because she hadn’t been able to handle her liquor. She felt dirty.

And the thought of alcohol only made that feeling intensify.

Even if she really, really wanted a drink.

Instead, she had found herself at the DEO, walking through the halls to her lab/office and wondering if Vasquez _ever_ went home.

“Agent Danvers.” The woman greeted, standing at the tall white terminal in the middle of the command center. Vasquez was tapping away at something on the computer like table, eye’s flitting between it and the screen on the wall. “Another late night.”

Alex nodded tiredly, intent on simply continuing to her office, in no mood to hash out the days details. She wasn’t sure if Winn had told Vasquez—she was technically head of IT— but she didn’t want to find out right now. She just wanted to be alone.

“I fucked up.”

Apparently, her mouth had other plans.

Vasquez paused in her work, a frown marring her features, brows knitting together as she turned to study Alex. Whatever she saw made her purse her lips, and nod.

“Follow me.”

And then they were walking through the DEO, and Alex _did_ find herself seated in her office. Just not alone.

Vasquez pressed a bottle of water in her hand from the mini fridge on her wall and sat next to her on the small black couch waiting patiently.

Alex fiddled with the label on the water bottle, glancing sporadically around her office. She really liked her office. It was simple. Clean. She had a large wooden desk on one side of the room, with the most expensive executive chair she could squeeze out of Hank. Along the same wall, she had managed to fit a small black leather couch and an end table. There was no other furniture in the room. The rest was reserved for a 65” smart display, a Hogwarts Banner, and a dart board.

Alex was obviously the only one allowed to use the dart board.

“There’s a girl. I’m… I feel…” She glanced up at her friend and saw the other woman trying to hide a look of skepticism. “Vaz… I know what it sounds like but… she’s different.” Alex squeezed her eyes shut, hating how her voice was getting scratchy and how stupid she sounded to her own ears. “Forget it. It doesn’t matter. Just forget I said anything.”

She ripped the cap off the water bottle, chugging the whole thing and tossing the plastic into a trash can across from her. Head dropping into her hands she tried to figure out her next move. She couldn’t focus on her da… on _him._ That was something she needed to discuss with Hank. But she couldn’t do that when she was like _this._

_ Stupid. _

She was so fucking stupid.

A hand on her shoulder startled her out of her assessment but she didn’t move from her now hunched over position.

“How’d you fuck up?” Vasquez’s voice was even and her hand a steady presence on Alex’s back. It calmed her down a bit.

“I saw someone today… Someone I thought was dead and I made a really shitty decision.” She dropped her hands, elbows still perched on her knees as she glanced at the other agent through her hair. “I… I got drunk.” There; ripping off a Band-Aid. “Really drunk. And Linda… She was there, and she was _so_ beautiful Vaz. And I just wanted…” She dropped her head back in her hands, heart and head pounding painfully in her body. She swallowed, trying futilely to fight back the emotions threatening to choke her. “It wasn’t supposed to be like that. She deserved… I wanted to treat her better than that. She deserved better than that.”

Vasquez was quiet for a moment before she sighed and squeezed Alex’s shoulder. “You mean better than you. You think she deserves better than you.”

Alex’s silence was her answer.

Another sigh.

“Alex… I can’t pretend to understand _everything_ that goes on in your head, but I do _try_ and… I think that you are way too hard on yourself. You might have your issues, but when you have your head on straight and _not_ at the bottom of a bottle… Alex, _anyone_ would be lucky to have you. Linda included.” She wrapped her arm tightly around Alex’s shoulders, shaking slightly to get her point across. “Seriously you big dummy. You’re the coolest person I know and as mean as you want everyone to think you are, you’re just a ball of fluff. And maybe the timing wasn’t great, but if you were both consenting adults then I don’t see the problem. Not every sexual experience is amazing; if you sucked this go ‘round, just knock her socks off next time.”

The huff of disbelief that escaped her chest was completely warranted and she smiled slightly at Vasquez’s description of her character, choosing to ignore the incorrect assumption about her sexual prowess. No way was she touching that.

“You crushing on me Vasquez?” She asked, looking over at the woman and feeling herself relax slightly. Because Vasquez didn’t seem mad or disappointed. Just concerned.

Alex could handle concerned.

“Definitely not. I’m still trying to get you to set me up with your friend Lucy.”

Alex snorted. “Lucy Lane is not my friend. She is my archnemisisisisisis.”

“That’s a lot of “sis’s”” Vasquez replied, eyebrows rising into her hairline.

Alex nodded solemnly. “She’s earned every one of them.”

The other agent laughed, pulling her arm back and gripping Alex’s hand in her own. “Listen Danvers, I can’t give you girl advice, I suck at that. I can only say that _talking_ is better than not talking. What I do want to give you is a list of AA meetings and their dates.” Alex felt her jaw clench but forced herself to remain still. Something that Vasquez obviously appreciated if the small smile she sent Alex was any indication. “I know you may not fit _every_ description of an alcoholic, but these meetings are to help _anyone_ looking to kick a habit. You may be functioning now, but I’d really like it if you could stay that way. You were doing so well, this might just help you get back on track. And I’ll go with you if you want.”

Alex frowned, but after a short pause, found herself nodding along.

Vasquez smiled kindly, making Alex look away and down at her hands.

“I also think,” Vasquez continued. “That it might be beneficial if you talked to a doctor. I know it’s not your thing.” The brunette rushed out, hand squeezing Alex’s almost painfully. “I know. But given your current situation, I think it might help you sort out your decision making. At the very least it could help you actually _keep_ your girl this time.”

Alex’s breath caught in her chest at the thought of _staying_ with Linda, of being able to have a real relationship with her. Actual tears sprung to her eyes at the impossibility of it all. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d wanted something this badly.

“Hank wouldn’t approve.”

He wouldn’t. He’d made it clear that it was her love life, or her job.

“Director Henshaw is not a tyrant Alex. He cares about you. He wants what’s best for you. He’s not going to be angry that you’re _happy_.”

She pulled her hand away, pushing her fingers into her hair and _clenching_. She needed a plan. Something to _do._

“CatCo is closed tomorrow.” She stated, her brain beginning to supply her with what she needed. “Is there a meeting in the morning?”

Vasquez pulled her tablet out and tapped away at her screen.

“Yes. There’s one near here actually. At 11.”

Alex nodded, once again dropping her hands, and standing. She shook out her shoulders with renewed determination. That was in about 7 hours. If she knocked herself out now, she wouldn’t be able to talk herself out of it.

“I want to go to that one… if you could make it.” At Vasquez’s nod, a slight weight was lifted off her chest and she exhaled slowly before walking over to her display and tabbing over to a scheduling tab. “After that I need to talk to Hank. I did some recon yesterday that he needs to be aware of and Li— _I found_ some missing links that might help with ALFA. I wanted to keep him updated.”

She pressed the button to schedule herself in for a 2:00 appointment with her boss.

After her meeting she would get ready for the party.

She would go pick up Linda.

She’d beg for forgiveness; explain _everything_ on their ride over to Cat.

And if Linda accepted than they could take it from there; Alex would do whatever she wanted.

She had no idea what she would do if Linda declined. If she told Alex the ever expected “you suck” and ran off somewhere with James Olsen.

Vasquez came up behind her and punched her in the shoulder. “Stop worrying so much. Everything’s going to be fine. Get some sleep, things will be clearer in the morning.”

Alex nodded, already moving towards her couch.

Vasquez gave her an exasperated look but didn’t comment.

Alex held onto her words.

She _really_ needed things to be clearer in the morning.

~*~

Kara sighed sleepily, burrowing deeper into the pillow under her head.

Comfort didn’t even begin to explain her current situation. She was surrounded by warmth, the blankets drawn over her shoulders and clutched under her, cocooning her in a nice burrito of _amazing_ and a scent she had come to identify as _Alex._

She wanted to wake up like this every day, she thought as she reached out for her bedmate.

This was the best. This was—

Her questing hand met nothing, fingers grasping at air as she slowly blinked open her eyes.

The other side of the bed lay empty, the sheets long since gone cold.

There were no other sounds in the apartment.

She was alone.

Alex was gone.

She glanced at the clock on Alex’s nightstand, the green numbers displaying the time as 5:12 AM. She needed to get back to the Spa. Eliza would worry if she wasn’t there in the morning.

Swallowing back her own feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt she stood and gathered her things, piecing herself back together as she fought not to think about what this meant.

Humans were so vacillating with their desires; their wants changing within the span of seconds due to increased expectations or a newly desired outcome. Alex had _wanted_ her last night. Had been the one to initiate the whole thing. The fact that she was gone now…

It was entirely possible that Kara just hadn’t been _good._

That Alex had changed her mind.

She was allowed.

Kara ran a hand through her hair, unwilling to touch anything that wasn’t hers in the apartment, feeling suddenly and overwhelmingly like an intruder. She glanced around the space, making sure she had everything as she retreated towards the door, the small twinge between her legs already abating as the sun started its ascent. Once it was in the sky, the marks she had found on her body would disappear. As if the night had never happened.

As if Alex had never touched her.

She bit her lip at the thought, walking out of the building and tugging her jacket tighter around her. She needed to stop thinking like this. It was just as likely that Alex had been called away on ALFA business. That she was prepping with her team for the party tonight.

It didn’t mean have to mean that she’d just left.

Kara blinked up at the sky, taking in the soft tones of orange that were starting to come out, the hotel looming a few blocks in front of her.

There was also the fact, she thought as she continued towards her destination, that Alex had been well past drunk when Kara had arrived at her apartment and Kara hadn’t let it deter her in the slightest. There had been a moment when Alex had pulled her towards the bedroom that Kara had considered stopping the whole thing but then it had just been…

There weren’t very many moments that Kara could remember where someone had touched her without wanting to hurt her or study her.

Alex had touched her like she’d _wanted_ her _;_ desired her. Knowing that Alex hadn’t been in complete control of herself made her feel incredibly selfish to accept it.

She wrapped her arms tighter around herself as she entered the hotel lobby and made her way to the elevator doors. Kara had not experienced much of human life, but she _was_ educated in it and some people would say she had taken advantage of a compromised woman. She was loathed to believe that they would be correct in assuming such, but Alex _had_ left. Maybe she had woken up next to Kara and been so angry or disgusted that she’d run as soon as she possibly could?

Kara wouldn’t fault her for that. The elevator dinged, and she stepped out onto her floor, eyes adjusting to the soft fluorescent lighting and peach painted walls. A wall of glass was to her left and she found herself stopping in front of it, taking in the sight of the city just waking up. Exhaling slowly, she closed her eyes, letting her hearing go past her human level hearing and seep out into the world. She usually loved mornings, loved waking up with the world and hearing _life_ begin.

The knots in her stomach caused by Alex’s absence made it much less magical.

Normally, she wouldn’t even allow herself this small luxury of _hearing_ ; the watch on her wrist acting as a deterrent to using her powers when not specifically sanctioned by Lillian. She could access them in times of emergency, but she found herself drained afterwards and she would prefer not to end up sweaty and puking. Pressing her forehead against the cool glass in front of her Kara fingered the watch on her wrist, the cool vibranium band unbreakable even for her super strength. At least when she was on kryptonite. She’d never had the chance to test it when she was fully powered. She’d been thinking of somehow broaching the topic with Alex, but she might have ruined that chance now.

She tensed slightly and pulled back from the window when she heard someone come up behind her, her nose taking a second to catch up with her hearing and identify the person as Eliza.

“You do know there’s a better view from your hotel room, right?”

Kara offered her a tired smile and shrug. “There’s more sun on this side of the building.”

Eliza smiled back, studying her face for a moment before nodding. “My husband used to love the sun. He’d curl up in it like some sort of reptile and just soak for hours—no matter how many times I’d tell him it wasn’t good for him.” A tortured look passed over her face for a moment before she visibly steeled herself. “Sorry. It’s way too early to be dredging up painful memories.”

“It’s ok.” Kara said, shrugging again, and hugging herself tighter. The oversized sweater she’d put on last night sliding with the movement to reveal her plain white dress shirt. She doubted it did much to cover the fact that she hadn’t slept here the night before, but she was too tired to really care now.

Eliza looked at her again, before she stepped forward and surprised Kara with a hug; the older woman’s arms coming up to hold her snuggly against her body.

“You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to, but I want you to know that I’m a really good listener. And I won’t judge; I’ve made enough mistakes in my life to try to hold anyone else accountable for theirs.” Eliza’s voice was soft, and Kara felt tears prick her eyes at the warmth she found in the woman’s arms, but she remained silent and stiff in the embrace. Eliza raised her hand to cradle the back of Kara’s head, rocking her gently. “In the meantime, I thought we could get a head start on our day. They’re offering a morning yoga class that I thought might be fun, then a shower, our last massage and brunch before we start getting you ready for your party. How does that sound?”

Eliza went to pull away and Kara came alive, hands finally rising from where they had remained at her sides and clenching in the fabric at the back of Eliza’s sweater. Eliza returned the embrace holding on tightly as Kara’s body started to tremble.

The older woman made soft hushing sounds and Kara pressed closer to her, bringing her head up slightly to talk easier.

“Thank you.” She managed to mumble out past the lump in her throat.

“You’re very welcome.” Eliza murmured, continuing to rock her in her arms.

~*~

After their brunch, Kara and Eliza made their way back up their floor. True to her word, Eliza hadn’t forced her to talk about what was bothering, choosing instead to regale her with stories from Alex’ childhood.

Apparently, her conquest had been more than a little adventurous… and rude.

Eliza had just finished telling her about how, when Alex was about 6, she had convinced a boy to eat a worm because he had been mean to her friend, when they reached their rooms.

Lena Luthor was stopped in front in Kara’s door, several bags in her hands, and her phone at her ear. She smiled brightly when she saw them approach, and quickly ended her call.

“Linda! I’m so glad I caught you.” Lena moved towards them, her hand out to Eliza in greeting. “Mrs. Danvers, I presume? I’m Lena, I work with Linda at CatCo and thought I could help her get ready for the big night.”

Eliza’s smile was slightly less bright than Lena’s and she looked between the two women curiously while shaking Lena’s hand. Kara was still stuck on Lena saying they ‘worked together’. That was a little more than an understatement in her opinion.

“Oh?” Eliza questioned when Lena released her hand. “Are you two going together or…”

Kara blushed to the roots of her hair and quickly shook her head. _Rao._ Now Alex’s mom thought she was some sort of gigolo.

Lena on the other hand found the idea hilarious.

“Sorry,” she said between her aristocratic chuckles, ignoring Kara’s alarmed facial expression. “It’s just that I have no desire to be on the other end of your daughter’s death glare all night. Agent Danvers has made it very clear what her intentions are towards our blushing hero, and that she will happily hide my body if I get in her way.”

Eliza chuckled and nodded, obviously nonplussed by the description of her daughter’s character. Kara herself found it to be slightly offensive. Alex would never do that.

“That sounds like my daughter.” She confirmed, her smile more genuine now that she apparently no longer saw Lena as a threat. Then her voice got more excited as she looked over the bags in Lena’s arms. “So, what did you have in mind? Are we turning her into a Disney princess? Please tell me we’re turning her into a Disney princess.”

“We are _so_ turning her into a Disney princess.” Lena said, her own excitement clear as day on her face.

Kara sighed as both women squealed and moved passed them to her door. Walking into her room, allowed her all of 5 seconds of solitude before she was being moved along by Eliza and Lena started laying out her bags in what she called stations.

Kara didn’t see what the big fuss was, it usually took her all of 20 minutes to get ready. Sure, she could say some of that was super speed, but most of it was the simplicity of the clothing she chose to wear.

Whatever was in Lena’s bags was apparently much more complicated.

Lena sat her in a chair and started maneuvering her hair around.

“I was thinking an up do, what are you feeling like?”

Kara really didn’t know… or care much. Her face must have shown that because Lena gave her a look of pure exasperation.

“Linda, forget about your job for a second and the fact that Cat will probably have you running around all night. Think about the fact that you like Alex and Alex is insanely crazy about you! I am all for feminism and female empowerment but tonight will be the first time Alex has seen you in anything but business casual clothing. Don’t you want that to be at least a little special?”

Well… when she put it like that.

“I’m… not sure?” Kara questioned, licking dry lips, and fiddling with her hands. “I’m sorry, it’s just I’m used to just picking something out of a magazine.” Which was true. Normally when CADMUS missions required her to go to events of this nature she copied the fashion of the latest celebrity. Apparently, that was not a cool thing to do anymore.

Uniqueness was the new quality that people admired.

“I don’t…” She licked her lips again as she continued trying to explain her thoughts to Lena, glancing over at Eliza with some trepidation. She involuntarily lowered her voice at the thought of talking about this in front of the woman but pushed on with her confession. “I’m not sure what she likes.”

Kara couldn’t seehormone levels but judging by the looks on Eliza and Lena’s faces, the estrogen levels in the room had just shot through the roof.

“Sweetheart, it’s wonderful that you care, but let’s try focusing on what _you_ like first ok?” Eliza came around the bed and grasped Kara’s hand in her own. “I promise Alex is going to love you in whatever you choose to wear.”

“How about we try you in a few simple hairstyles and you let me know which one you like, ok?”

Kara nodded to Lena’s inquiry, feeling herself start to both relax and tense, an odd feeling to be sure.

“How about dancing Linda?” Eliza asked. “Are you comfortable with that?”

And Kara blushed because, while she had danced in the past, it wasn’t necessary information and so it had been wiped. And she really didn’t want to go back to CADMUS and ask for a data load.

Lena squeezed her shoulders and brought her out of her thoughts, looking at Kara through the mirror. “No worries, we’ve got at least five hours before your Agent gets here anyway. We’ll give you a crash course, won’t we Mrs. Danvers?”

Eliza was smiling softly at the brunette and patted the hand that Lena had on Kara’s shoulder. “We will indeed, and my name is Eliza dear.”

Lena blinked, Kara watching shock flicker on her face before the CEO was able to stuff it down and cover it with a smile.

Well. That was interesting.

~*~

Alex exhaled slowly, posture rigid while she waited for Hank in his office. AA had been _tough._ Listening to everyone else tell their anecdotes had made her realize how bad her _own_ problem was… and could become.

She wasn’t stupid, she realized that the impetus that had driven her to seek help was her desire to have a relationship with Linda that wouldn’t be toxic. But, she also knew that she had to _want_ to be better all on her own. Knowing that, if Linda wasn’t in the picture, she wouldn’t wind up right back where she started.

Self-love and all that.

Vasquez had recommended she see the DEO psychologist too, citing that the woman had always wanted to work with her. Doctor McKay was well known for her kind disposition, something that Alex had always seen as slightly maniacal in nature. Like a Stepford wife.

Vasquez had rolled her eyes and asked her to think about it.

Hank’s entrance had her sitting even straighter, unwilling to show any of the inner turmoil rolling under her skin.

“Agent Danvers,” he greeted, voice deep and calming as he rounded his desk and sat down. “I was told you had an update.”

She nodded, licking her lips before proceeding to fill him in on what they had discovered so far making sure to leave Linda out of it. She wouldn’t be able to handle the argument that followed.

“I don’t know how I feel about you using your friend to gain an invitation Alex.” He paused, brows furrowing as he regarded her. “You’ve made sure the proper protocols are in place? She’s protected?”

“Yes sir.” Alex confirmed, trying not to squirm in her seat like a 3rd grader. “Everything’s been taken care of… She’s my best friend, I wouldn’t risk her without making sure every single base was crossed.”

Hank nodded, approval shining in his eyes. “Then good work Agent. Please let me know if you need any additional resources.”

He moved to stand, and Alex cut him off.

“Sir. There’s one more thing.” She averted her eyes, licked her lips again and Hank resumed his seat. Anxiety crept up her throat and she forced the words out, imagining she was telling the story of someone else’s life. No way could this be her current reality. “When I ran recon with Detective Sawyer… we encountered a CADMUS agent working with an alien trader, presumably ALFA but we haven’t confirmed… it was Jeremiah Danvers sir. He’s alive.”

She glanced up at him, hands now clenched in her lap, and took in his grave expression.

“Are you, all right?”

Alex blinked in shock, not having prepared herself for that question. It wasn’t very professional, and her mental state had little to do with their current state of affairs.

“I’m fine.”

Hank sighed, his face shifting to outright concern. “If you need anything Alex… a few days to… process? We can manage—”

“I said I was _fine_.” She argued, forcing her hands to relax before her nails cut into her palms. She exhaled slowly looking away from her mentor and at the wall to her left. Hank had hung a photo frame up on the wall, the stock family image still in its casing.

Everyone thought it was pure male laziness; after hearing Felicity describe him as a scared father, Alex was starting to rethink that assessment. She knew Hank’s past; how he was really a green Martian named J’onn J’onnz who had lost his entire race to genocide. Including his wife and two daughters. It was one of the ways he’d gotten her to trust him—he’d been just as alone as she was.

“Did you know?” She asked, voice scratchy from suppressed emotions. “Did you know he was alive?”

“No.” was the immediate response. “I may never have seen the body after… but his injuries… Alex I _heard_ him take his last breath. I swear to you that had I known, I would have done everything in my power to return him to your mother and you.”

Alex nodded, eyes wet but face dry as she turned back to face him. “I know.” She exhaled loudly and closed her eyes for a moment, visibly steeling herself. “What now?”

Hank leaned back in his chair, hands clasping on his stomach. “Now, you go get ready for your party. Cat’s going to need all the help she can get to make it through tonight. Intelligence says an attack of some sort is pretty much expected, whether that will be ALFA related remains to be seen. In the meantime, I will pull Jeremiah’s file, see if there was anything I missed. Anything that might help us understand where he’s been all these years.”

And just like that, Alex didn’t feel quite so alone anymore.

~*~

The party was in full swing when the limo pulled up to the front of the venue. Paparazzi lined the entryway and made anxiety sit high in Alex’s chest.

She stepped out of the car, blocking the door until she got a nod from her man at the end of the line and her own cursory observation had come back clean. Cat exited first, and Alex put her body behind and to the side of the CEO, body blocking anyone who tried to come into the small bubble Alex and the 3 other guards had created. Linda was squeezed in by Alex’s hand landing on the small of her back and forcing her to keep up with the small group as they made their way to the entrance.

A hand shooting between her and Cat had Alex grabbing onto a wrist and twisting, forcing the overzealous man to drop his camera and howl in pain. Alex didn’t stop to apologize, only continued forward until the party was safely ensconced in the walls of the building.

She endured Cat’s heavy eye roll, watching stiffly as the CEO handed her coat over to her assistant.

She was used to running interference for strangers, for higher ups, people who she didn’t give a damn about. While Cat Grant wasn’t her favorite person, she was still someone Alex had _known_ for almost 6 months now. The pressure to protect her in such an open and publicized event was making her feel more on edge than usual. The fact that Linda, a woman who Alex had come to consider more than a friend—and who she was crushing hard on— would be glued to the CEO’s side made her want to nix the whole thing.

The dangers of their current situation were seriously making her consider having Linda arrested and locked away in a tower somewhere where she would be safe. Now that they had reconciled, she might be able to get Winn to draw up some fake charges.

When she had gone to pick Linda up, at the spa, not her apartment as previously planned—she hadn’t known exactly what to expect, but she had prepared herself for a ton of angry reactions. Alex had gone in armed with nothing but an apology and her willingness to share her thoughts. Those plans had been squandered handily by the presence of Lena Luthor.

In case Alex hadn’t mentioned it before… she really, really did not like Lena Luthor. The CEO, Linda, and Alex’s _mother_ (the traitor) were all laughing and smiling when she finally arrived, sipping mimosas as Lena regaled them with some story or other.

Alex felt like she’d swallowed a sock.

She didn’t even get what was so great about Lena anyway. Alex was smarter than her, and taller. And yeah, so Lena was attractive—very attractive— but Alex could toss someone twice her weight across a room. And, yeah there was the whole money thing, but her best friend was an extremely successful CEO in her own right. If Linda wanted a yacht, she could just make Felicity buy her one.

Clearly, she was handling the situation very well.

When the group had noticed her walking into the lobby, Eliza’s smile had widened while Linda’s had dimmed. Compliments had been given to her about the fresh suit she was wearing (Felicity had wanted to get her in a dress but given the lingering threat Alex had argued against the practicality of it.) She’d worn her shiny black dress shoes for the same reason. Linda and Lena had already been in their coats when she arrived. Already dressed and ready to go.

They’d said their goodbyes to Eliza—who’d made Alex stop and take a picture like a weirdo—and the now blushing agent had led them back out to the car. Lena had kept up a light dialogue with her friend and Alex had played the part of stoic bodyguard, choosing not to say anything as they continued on to pick up Siobhan and Cat.

See? Clearly handling it well.

Alex had sat in the back, sidearm at the ready as she kept an eye on their surroundings, ears listening in to the chatter of her team as they made their way through the city. She was also studiously trying to not to stare at Linda. Siobhan had been sitting next to her, but Alex had barely spared the woman a glance, the glittering diamonds at Linda’s ears trying valiantly to pull her entire focus to the woman in question.

Alex hadn’t been able to see much more than that, the lighting in the limo only allowing her to make out a simple looking up do, with loose spiral curls that hung around the frames of her glasses. So, she’d prepared herself for the hair. Maybe a bit more makeup than the barely there dusting that usually covered Linda’s face.

She had not prepared herself for the dress.

She was a shit bodyguard.

In her defense she _had_ warned Hank.

Multiple times.

She’d warned him multiple times.

All the times.

Because right now, as Linda was being used as a coat rack by the small party that consisted of Cat, Siobhan, and Lena?

Someone could have come in with an Uzi and Alex wouldn’t have noticed.

Because wow.

Just wow.

Linda was wrapped in white; a beautiful dress made of a soft material hung from her shoulders and draped tightly around her bodice. The skirt ended in soft waves that fell to the floor, just covering the black peep toe heels on her feet. What really had Alex so wrecked were the diamond shaped cut outs on the waist of the dress, exposing smooth swaths of creamy skin to her awestruck eyes.

By all accounts the dress was extremely modest, only the diamond cutouts and lack of sleeves exposing any skin to wandering eyes. Alex still found herself stuck on the word exquisite.

A throat clearing to her right pulled her out of her Linda induced coma and to the agent that was trying very hard to keep a straight face.

Heat rose to her cheeks and her mouth pulled down in a frown before she refocused her attention on the gala and the women now walking towards the entrance. She’d just managed a breath of relief that they’d all been oblivious to her obvious gaping when she saw the smug look on Cat’s face.

She pursed her lips, staring straight ahead and praying for patience.

She really, really didn’t like Cat Grant.

She tilted her chin towards the CEO and her partner nodded his head, peeling off to follow them as Alex made her way towards Linda who was headed to the coat check.

The agent found herself running a nervous hand through her slightly curled red mop, nervous energy making her more jittery than normal. Linda was smiling at the coat check clerk as she helped the young man place hangers in the garments she handed over.

Alex waited with fidgeting hands for her to finish, trying for a small smile when Linda finally turned to face her.

The blonde didn’t smile back.

“You didn’t have to wait for me.” Linda wrapped her arms around her torso, a habit Alex realized she employed when she was feeling particularly vulnerable. “I can take care of myself.”

Alex nodded, more for something to do than in any actual agreeance with Linda’s words. “I know. I just—I wanted to apologize. For last night. Not for the _night_!” She hurried to say, hands raising in front of her in a defensive posture. “I… I liked—I just…” God this was hard. And Linda looking at her like she’d grown a third head was _not_ helping the situation. She glared at her shoes and inhaled sharply, forcing herself to take a breath and _relax._ “I just wanted our first time together to be perfect… but I messed that up by drinking and then _leaving._ I shouldn’t have—I’m sorry Linda. I got some… really rough news that day and … I’m sorry. I swear I never wanted to hurt you. I really like you and I’d like a chance to make it up to you… if you’ll let me?”

There. Her face was so hot from embarrassment that it was bordering on painful, but she’d apologized and at least semi-explained. Besides, no way was she about to pour out her woes in the middle of National City’s elite.

“I…” Linda paused, hands rubbing up and down on her arms before she took a small step closer to Alex face pinched in concern. “I don’t like it when you drink.”

A soft huff of breath escaped the brunette and she offered a sardonic smile without looking up. “I don’t like me very much when I drink either.”

“I would… really like the chance to dance with you.” Alex’s head shot up at the soft words and her mouth dropped open in disbelief. No way could it be that easy. “Winn was showing me some videos of what to expect and… I really like to dance… if that’s something you would like too? Maybe?” Linda’s expression was a pained grimace as she tried to awkwardly navigate through her request and it warmed Alex’s heart. The fact that Linda wanted to dance with _her_ after everything she’d already done to hurt her…

“I can’t.” The words were out of her mouth before she realized what she was saying, and Linda’s face flamed with mortification. Alex grabbed at her hand and squeezed gently, trying to alleviate some of the uncomfortableness and hurried to try to explain her response. “It’s not that I don’t want to! Trust me, I really, really want to dance with you Linda. I just… I’m on duty and it’s not allowed.”

“Oh.” Linda replied, pulling her bottom lip between her teeth and looking anywhere but at Alex.

“BUT,” Alex continued, desperately trying to fix her fuck up. “I would really like it if we could talk after this is all done… once Cat’s gone home and I’m back to being just Alex. I would just really like to explain what’s going on in my head and… I don’t know, maybe figure out what we’re doing?”

Linda’s eyes finally met hers, hope shining through with the smile the other woman gave her. Then the blonde was leaning forward, tugging slightly with the hand Alex had captured in her own and bringing the other one up to Alex’s cheek. Linda pressed a soft kiss to Alex’s lips that made her release a shaky breath and caused her heart to stutter.

“I would really like that Just Alex. Thank you for apologizing… I’m sorry too… If I took advantage—”

“You didn’t.” Alex said, quick to nip _that_ in the bud. “You didn’t do anything I didn’t want you to do. You didn’t do anything wrong.” She stroked her thumb over Linda’s knuckles and the woman ducked her head and blushed at her words.

This was dangerous.

Alex dropped her hand, straightening and fighting her own blush. She dropped slightly at her waist, arm held out towards the entrance as she smiled at Linda’s still blushing form. “Shall we milady?”

Linda giggled, already moving to reconvene with her boss.

Alex couldn’t wait for this party to end.

~*~

Kara laughed softly, sipping on the glass of juice in her hand and focused on Lena’s words and small smirk as she whispered stories about the other guests. The elite members of National City were very ridiculous if Lena was to be believed. Apparently, Cat had invited a seemingly normal person to the event though. The man was internet royalty because he had deleted the twitter account of the president of the United States. At least temporarily. His presence was enough to show Cat’s political allegiance without overtly being disrespectful or combative. Lena thought it was hilarious.

The fact that people cared more about the president’s current sex scandal than the policy he was broadcasting on twitter… not so much.

Unfortunately working at CatCo had proven to Kara that the desire for scandal held firm. Ms. Grant did what she could to direct the stories her publication pushed out, but it looked like people were always going to be more interested in sex and beauty than real world problems.

Lena had just started explaining how a man had been put in charge of a department that he didn’t even know existed until about a month prior to his hiring, when Kara felt something rumble in the floor.

It was subtle, barely there and definitely not noticeable to the human senses. She smiled, placing her arm on Lena’s and leaning in to tell her she was going to grab another drink.

Lena frowned but nodded in understanding. _She_ wasn’t allowed to grab her own beverage; someone as important as her would be risking social suicide to do so at such an event. And, while Kara had a feeling that normally Lena wouldn’t care about such things, the recent shadows that had fallen over her and Cat’s names would have made anyone cautious.

As it was, it allowed Kara the room to move closer to the drink table—and Cat Grant.

Winn joined her at the table shortly after, hands loaded with pot stickers as he grinned up at her in his own deep red suit.

“Thanks Winn!” She said, smiling at his offering and listening to him fill her in on his night so far. Apparently, he had developed a bit of a crush on Siobhan.

Gross.

Her eyes flowed over to the CEO as she waited for her cup to fill from the water cooler on the far table, cheeks puffed full of food. Cat was trapped in conversation with a short pompous looking woman, wrapped in fur. Golda Davidson if Kara remembered correctly. The woman was the wife of someone from Old Money; her family one of the largest names in the cattle industry. Which would explain her obvious love for animal hides.

Satisfied that her boss was occupied for the moment, and still half listening to Winn, Kara allowed herself a short indulgence and glanced over at Alex.

The DEO agent was as dapper as the last time Kara had allowed herself such a frivolity and her beauty shone in the black suit she was wearing. What was incredibly, sinfully attractive to Kara—one of the main reasons she had _not_ been staring at Alex all night—was the suspenders. Black straps just barely visible on Alex’s shoulders, cut down over the crisp white shirt on her chest and attached to the fitted slacks that dressed her legs.

Kara had never really been all that into clothing choices but now she found herself suddenly and hopelessly in love with suspenders.

There was also some frustration mixed in there as well, but she wasn’t going to touch on that.

Alex chose that moment to look in her direction and their eyes met through the crowd. Kara was vividly reminded of that Mean Girls movie Alex had made her watch where the narrator had basically made fun of all the teenage tropes.

Well…

That whole slow-motion thing that supposedly happens when you make eye contact with your amazingly stunning possible love interest?

That was definitely real.

As was that second underground shudder. Her eyes widened a fraction, but it must have been enough of a reaction because Alex was spinning, gun in her hand at the next moment. Kara shoved Winn under the drink table and moved towards Cat, body blocking the CEO and pushing her towards the predetermined safe room just as a high-pitched whine shattered all the glass in the room and caused all the humans to clutch their ears.

Kara wasn’t human. She was starting to wonder if Alex wasn’t one as well since the agent got off two shots at the being that had attacked them without clutching at her ears in pain.

It was a man; tall, bald, bare chested and muscular. He was dressed in loose fitting black pants and had metal gauntlets on his hands and steel boots—not steel toed—just solid steel shoes.

Something flickered on the man’s forehead and Alex rolled, barely dodging an explosion that rocked the ground she had just vacated.

Next to her Cat cursed, and Kara realized that she was still moving, and that the older woman was having trouble keeping up.

She was about to slow down and allow the woman more time, when another man entered the room from the opposite side. Kara muttered a quick apology and pushed the woman forward—she _wanted_ to carry her, but her directives were clear that revealing herself was _not_ an option.

Then they were being herded by other “FBI” agents and Ms. Grant was safely on her way to lock down.

Alex was not.

The sound of explosions rocked the building, and Kara forcefully tripped on her own ankle and fell with a startled cry. Ms. Grant looked back at her in concern and tried to help, but, as was expected, most of the agents continued herding her to safety.

Siobhan scowled at her over her shoulder, her expression dark and menacing as she tried to figure out what Kara’s play was.

Kara didn’t much care.

Her attention was only on the agents, their sole purpose to protect Cat.

Only one stopped to check on Kara and she distracted him long enough for his comrades to turn the corner before she gently poked his skull.

He went down hard.

Another high-pitched whine sounded behind her and she looked over her shoulder as Sparky Sparky Boom Man let off another mind powered ballistic at the crowd. He was closing in, and if Kara let him get any closer, Cat wouldn’t survive the night.

She was gonna need a new outfit.

~*~

Alex checked her clip as she caught her breath behind an ice sculpture. Not the best coverage, but these weird “combustion” men had demolished all of the really great hiding spots.

She’d take what she could get at this point.

“Winn,” she panted, pressing hard on her ear piece as she realized she was running low on ammo. “Please tell me you found a weakness.”

“ _I am really sorry Alex but I cannot do that.”_

She scowled, hearing another whine and popping up to fire another two shots at Combustion Man Number 1. The bullets were aimed at his chest, but he batted them away with his metal gauntlet and fired solidly at her.

She went boneless, allowing her body to drop and ignoring the smell of charred hair as she rolled onto her belly and army crawled over to duck behind the chocolate fountain.

“NOT OK Agent Schott!” She whisper yelled, trying to think of something that would actually hurt these guys. One of her agents got a little over zealous and was promptly shot through his vest, his yell drowned out by the panicking crowd. “I need something to take out that eye bomb thing or everyone here is dead.”

“I KNOW! It’s just I’ve never even _heard_ of this guy before! Are we certain he’s even alien—don’t answer that. More important things! If he’s shooting from his eye it makes sense that if you take it out the bomb won’t work anymore. Did you try that?”

“No shit Sherlock! First thing I tried obviously. He just grabs the bullets.”

“Then shoot him so he can’t see.”

“Oh yeah! Easy peasy.” Alex muttered, glancing over at a cast iron pan that held the remains of what was once a roast.

She grabbed the handle and pulled it over to her, ignoring the heat and making sure she was covered as she tested the weight.

This was so stupid.

This was something that clearly only worked in the movies.

This was not a movie.

She should _not_ be attempting this.

“Where is he?” She asked, firm grip on the pan and she bounced it against her leg.

“3:00.”

Alex inhaled, exhaled.

The pan was up in the air and she waited till it was 4 seconds into its descent before shooting.

Her bullet hit the pan, ricocheted and then…

“Ummm…” Winn started. “What exactly were you trying to do there?”

She didn’t know where it went but obviously that plan was a bust.

She yanked her leg back as the pan clattered dangerously close to where her ankle had been.

Stupid movies and their stupid overactive imaginations that never _fucking_ worked! Ugh! This was so not a cool way to die!

And if Linda got hurt—boy was she gonna be _pissed._

“ _Shut up,_ Winn!”

She glanced up from her hiding spot and knew instantly that that had been a mistake.

Combustion Man number 1, roared in anger and charged towards her, his mouth bared in a snarl. Death was really ugly, Alex thought, gun in hand as she waited with her last bullet in the chamber of her gun. Combustion Man, growled as he flipped over a table in his path his boots stomping on some spindly elf looking man and causing more screams to fill the air.

People fled, the room still a panicked frenzy of bodies as everyone tried to find a safe place to hide and retreat. They need not have rushed; Combustion man had eyes only for Alex.

He grabbed her by the throat, fingers tightening ever so slightly and seconds away from snapping her neck when she whipped her gun hand up and shot him in his third eye.

He blinked once in shock and dropped.

She didn’t even have a moment to rest before she heard his twin brother, Combustion Man Number 2 charge at her from the other side, rage sounding from his chest at his brother’s death.

Great. She thought, and she tried to pull air into her abused windpipe and grab a new magazine at the same time.

Just fucking great.

Shots were fired throughout the hall, her team mates opening fire and their bullets ricocheting harmlessly off the meta/alien.

Alex had just managed to line up the new cartridge when she realized she wouldn’t have enough time to draw her weapon and fire. She slammed the new mag in and dove to the side.

Combustion Man Number 2, saw the move and changed direction with her, his hand swiping out to grab her as Alex tried to force her body as far away as possible.

A blur sped over her shoulder and Combustion Man Number 2 was suddenly and thankfully gone.

She waited, eyes darting around the facility as she communicated with her team on comms and through hand gestures.

The area was clear.

They waited, everyone on high alert for the next ten minutes but no other attack was forthcoming, and Winn gave the all clear of any other perps from his scan.

Only then did Alex allow herself to worry about Linda and give the order to escort Cat Grant and her group back to their homes.

~*~

Kara was _pissed._

Sparky Sparky Boom Man had almost _killed_ Alex. She’d seen him charge his stupid eye firecracker thing and _aim._

The large man struggled in her grip, her arms wrapped like a vice around his hips as she flew him towards the docks.

He howled in rage, his fists beating harmlessly against her back and she scowled as she dropped him to the shipping containers below.

Sparky took the twenty-foot drop like a champ, landing on his feet as if it had been a small hop, in the time it took Kara to take out the cameras. She landed about thirty feet away from him, eyes taking him in from beneath her fukumen, feet spread, and hands clasped behind her.

She was going to kill him.

He sneered at her, flexing his arms and roaring as his forehead flickered and revealed an eye-shaped blue light. She moved at the same moment he released the jettison of power, her legs speeding her towards him before the blast had made it more than a few inches from his face.

Grabbing him around the shoulders, she sped back the way she came, swapping positions with the man and resuming his former spot.

She stood, feet spread, and hands clasped behind her, eyes taking him in from beneath her fukumen as she watched his own energy blast punch a hole through his chest.

He fell.

And he did not get back up.

And Kara’s rage left her as suddenly as it had come.

She frowned, she had forgotten herself; reacted purely on her baser instincts instilled in her by CADMUS. If she was going to seek help, she would need to work to be worthy of it.

Floating up into the sky, Kara abandoned the body where it was. There was nothing to tie her or CADMUS to the incident; the man had technically killed himself.

She dropped back into gallery as quietly as she had left, floating silently through the airducts until she was able to climb into the bathroom where she had changed clothes. Hearing Agents making their way through her floor, she quickly changed back into her clothes and flung her carry bag out of a window. The adhesive would stick to the building next door and stop any prying eyes from finding her gear.

That done, she hid in a stall and tried to look as nervous as possible.

When the agents came in, they saw a terrified assistant trying to hide near the toilets. Nothing more and nothing less. They had no reason to suspect her, so they let her go, directing her towards the exit.

She spotted Cat almost immediately, the media mogul in the open directing her staff, eyes steadily searching the crowd and ignoring the security team squared around her. Or trying to.

Alex, standing next to the CEO and looking more than a little rumpled, apparently had had enough showboating for one night because she stepped up next to Cat and whispered something to her.

Ms. Grant scowled, glanced at a large black man behind her, back at Alex, said something to Alex and then allowed herself to be taken to her limo. The man smirked but Alex had her hands full trying to direct a seemingly intoxicated Siobhan to follow Cat.

Reporters hindered most of her progress and Kara moved to help her. Now that the party was over, maybe they could finally have that talk? It had sounded like Alex might be interested in spending more time together, and, although Kara now had to focus on her directives, it would give her a chance to try to explain her own situation.

Besides that, she just really liked spending time with Alex. Kissing her. Touching her. Everything.

It was all amazing.

The smile that had started to stretch on her face dropped, when, finally at the door of the car, Siobhan suddenly turned in Alex’s arms and kissed her. Like full on kiss. On the mouth.

Alex stood there, arms catching Siobhan as she tripped herself out of the kiss and drunkenly hit on the agent in front of her.

Alex smiled, arms holding onto Siobhan’s shoulders to steady her.

Kara turned away, hand rubbing at her chest where she’d felt a sudden and intense flare of pain.

Ow.

That one had hurt.

~*~

Winn was busy pulling surveillance for the NCPD when she finally found him. Linda had been AWOL when she'd made it back into the building and she needed to know she was ok. She had last seen the blonde assistant laughing with the IT guru by the appetizers table, so she figured Winn would be able to tell her what had happened. She hated feeling like this; on edge, waiting for news she was sure was going to be bad.

Call her pessimistic but not being able to find someone after a pretty nasty gun fight usually meant they'd been hurt or injured in some way. The only thing keeping her in the building now was the fact that she'd checked with every ambulance that had left that night and Linda hadn't been on any of them.

Winn shook the lead officers hand, sleeves rolled up to his forearms and suit jacket mysteriously missing. Alex was immediately in his personal space once the cops had vacated.

"Have you seen Linda?"

The man's lips pursed, and he shook his head quickly.

Alex scowled.

"This is important Winn. I haven't seen her since before this all went down. If she's hurt--"

"Calm down!" Winn made a cutting motion with his hands, ending the beginning of her tirade and speaking over her. "Linda made it out fine. She's the one that got Ms. Grant in the back office, I saw her a little after everything had settled down."

Something in her chest unclenched, and she felt some of the tension ease out of her shoulders.

Nodding she asked, "Ok so, where is she? Did she go home?"

Winn's mouth pulled down, eyebrows pulling together in consternation. "Alex… what are you doing?"

"What do you mean?" Impatience danced within her, tempting her go search for Linda on her own. Winn's stalling was aggravating and confusing. Obviously, she was looking for Linda to make sure she was ok. She didn't understand the need for questions. Or the facial expression Winn was giving her. "Look, I apologized for what I did already so—”

"This isn't about me and you!" The anger in Winn's voice was palpable and almost forced Alex back a step. She crossed her arms defensively when he raised his index finger to point at her chest. "Not everything is about _you_ Alex. What's between me and you is that you are a Grade A Asshole and I'm done taking your shit. But you apologized and I believe you meant it, and your trying so I’m happy. We’re good. Whatever you’re doing with Linda is not. You need to decide what you want Alex." He shook his head, dropping his hands loosely at his sides as he eyed her with exasperation. "And you need to do it fast, because whatever you pulled tonight with Siobhan… That was… I don't--  eep!"

Alex pressed the man harder against the wall, her fist pushing into his chest where it clung to the fabric of his shirt.

"Winn,” She started, speaking slowly and clearly. Winn's eyes widened but zeroed in on her, his face rigid in shock. "Nothing happened between Siobhan and me. I don't know what you saw, but I didn't do anything with her. So, I'm gonna need you to be real clear here bud. Linda: Where is she? You have five seconds to tell me before my index finger--"

"Gracey Park." He blinked rapidly, hand closing over hers to try to alleviate some of the pressure. "She said she was gonna walk through Gracey Park."

"Did you tag her?"

He nodded quickly, and she fought back a smile. She would never truly hurt Winn, but it was nice to know that she could still instill the fear of God in him when necessary. She released him and handed him her phone waiting patiently as he punched in the access codes that would allow her to see Linda's exact location.

When he was done, he handed the phone back to her, tugging nervously at his clothes.

Checking the device, she nodded.

"Thanks," She said tucking it into her back pocket and handing him one of the claws that she'd found after her fight with Combustion Man Number 1. She sighed and paused, feet poised to exit. “Thank you for forgiving me. I—it means a lot.”

Winn blinked down at the claw in his hand, a confused expression pulling at his face before he finally shook his head in exasperation. “Go get your girl you big dummy.”

Alex shot him a grin and took off for her bike.

Fitting her helmet onto her head, she double checked that Jones was with Cat. That the team of DEO agents were where they were supposed to be. Seeing everything looked ok, she flipped down her visor and got on her Ninja, the soft rumble of the engine pulling her away from the ruined party and away from Winn.

She had faith that they would be ok; she could still see how much he cared, and she knew her own feelings hadn't diminished. It might take time, and a fair amount of work on her part, but she was willing to take her blows for him. Winn meant too much to her for her to just let their friendship die.

She was pulled from her thoughts when she arrived at the park. It was well past midnight at this point and the air was brisk with the pull of winter. Not that it was overly cold. Alex had lived in Gotham, and the winters there had been bitter beasts of cruelty. National City's easy 60 was something she had definitely loved when she'd made the move. Still, even if Linda was less likely to get hypothermia, there were other dangers in the park after dark and Alex hated the idea that she was in there alone.

Especially if she thought Alex had done something with Siobhan.

She wasn't stupid. She knew the rumor mill at Catco had carried her name through quite a few conversations. Her reputation as a flirt had proceeded her, and she was sure that Linda must have heard it. At the time, she had been thinking only of how easy it was to get information from blushing females (or easily manipulated males), and not of any consequences that may be inflicted on her hypothetical relationships.

She hadn't planned on Linda; hadn't even seen her coming.

But now she was here, and Alex wanted nothing more than to reassure her that she had nothing to worry about; that Siobhan wasn't a threat.

Sighing, she looked down at her phone, following her GPS to the location marked "Unicorn". Apparently, Winn and Cat had been chatting and had decided Linda fit the description. The absurdity of such a thing actually happening made her snicker.

She was so distracted by imagining Winn at a fancy tea party lunch with Cat that she almost stumbled into a lake.

A lake illuminated by soft blue light. She blinked and looked out over the surface, following the light to the center of its intensity. As she got closer, she was able to make out soft sounds, almost whale-like in nature, but much more melodic. Almost like singing but a distinct hum.

And then something jumped out of the water.

Blue scales shimmered in the moonlight, a joyful sound leaving the creature as it left its watery home in an attempt to meet a being made of yellow light. The musical joy continued as the creatures continued to play, Alex too far away to make out any distinct feature except for blue scales on the water dweller and orange wings on the flying one.

And then more of them came to the party, about a dozen all told, dancing and playing, and singing.

She couldn't tear her eyes away.

"They are what humans call sprites." Alex whirled around, hand on her gun, even as she overbalanced and was caught gently by Linda's hand on her elbow. "Are you ok?" The blonde asked after she'd righted herself.

"Fine." Alex mumbled, attention pulling between Linda and the 'sprites'. "What are they really called?"

Linda shrugged, eyes going back to the creatures in the lake. "I don't really know. I don't speak their language. I've gotten bits and pieces… like how they use this area because it's considered 'bad' by the humans. No name though. I don't think they work that way."

"We thought it was polluted," Alex said in agreement, pointing out at the lake. "The water. There was a huge automobile dumping done in the 70's that we thought killed most of the life forms but I guess not."

"They weren't here, they came from the rivers, this is their… vacation home I guess… Will you tell your people they're here?"

Alex frowned looking over at the other woman's tense expression and crossed arms.

"No. I'd never betray you like that."

The answering smile she received was small but it let her know she'd chosen the right thing to say.

Licking dry lips, she moved closer to Linda. Stopping when she was almost shoulder to shoulder with her.

"I missed you at the party. I thought something had happened. I couldn't find you after I sent Siobhan home."

It was Linda's turn to frown, the blonde's eyes not leaving the ground.

"You sent Siobhan home?"

"Mmhmm." Alex agreed in a hum. "In an Uber."

She watched patiently as Linda chewed on her bottom lip and remembered vividly the short chaste kiss that the enchanting woman had pressed to her mouth just hours before.

"I… didn't want to get in the way." The answer was given pausingly as if Linda had been unsure of her answer.

Alex frowned, face contemplative before she reached in her jacket and pulled out her phone.

“What are you doing?”

The agent looked up at the inquiry peering into nervous eyes and offering a reassuring smile.

“Just texting Cat that I found you and that I’ll make sure you get home safely. She threatened me with financial ruin earlier if I let anything happen to you. She was pretty peeved I wouldn’t let her stay and look for you; something about making sure all of her employees were accounted for.”

Linda blushed, arms pulling tighter around herself. “Oh.”

Alex hummed again and looked back over the water. "You know, I never got that dance."

"I'm sorry?" Linda asked, face pinched in confusion as she twisted her torso slightly to face Alex. The agent was tapping at her phone again and shortly after soft music started to flow from the device.

"You asked me to dance earlier and I said I couldn't because of Cat." Alex replied, turning fully to face the woman next to her and clasping her hands behind her back. "She's safely to her penthouse by now. I'm technically off the clock. We've got mood music, ambience… I want my dance. Please." She tried for a charming smile, but felt it came off slightly stiff. She was nervous, Linda was well within her rights to refuse and given what she must have thought occurred that night, Alex didn't blame her. But she really wanted someone to just trust her for once.

Linda's eyes searched her face, and Alex forced herself to stay patient, despite the well of anxiety that was threatening to choke her. Being looked at with eyes that intense should not be allowed. Yet, Alex found herself craving the attention. Dammit she was turning into one of those lovestruck fools she'd always made fun of.

Like Maggie.

And then Linda was nodding at her and nothing else mattered, especially when the taller woman offered her hand out to Alex.

Grinning, Alex fitted her hand in Linda's and allowed herself to be pulled close to the blonde's body. Linda wasn’t smiling, and she was pretty stiff in Alex’s arms but it was a start. Alex’s right hand rested on the woman’s waist, right on the diamond cut outs that she’d been itching to touch all night. Flashes of their night together filled her head, and she had to fight not to think about how Linda sounded in the middle of sex. Because they would not be having sex tonight. Alex was going to take her home after this and leave her at the door like a proper gentlewoman. And then she was going to find everything she could on ALFA. It would be easier to explain a relationship to Hank if she wasn't in the middle of a case.

She fit her arm around Linda's waist when she saw the hesitation on her face, and easily started to lead them in a slow dance. It was a simple box step that Alex had learned before they'd lost her dad and Kara and was easy enough for her to lead Linda in now.

Eventually the blonde grinned, relaxing marginally as she followed Alex's lead, giggling every so often when she or Alex messed up.

Alex grinned along with her, enjoying the moment and basking in Linda's presence.

Allowing herself a few moments of peace.

_______

Kara was at war with herself. Ms. Grant’s words about demanding respect kept replaying in her mind.

But…

Alex's arm around her waist felt comforting and she had the urge to bury herself in the woman; to pull her closer and allow her to hug her ailments away.

It was unrealistic.

But Kara still hoped.

Alex pushed her away slightly, moving back so their clasped hands extended between them, before tugging Kara back into the warm circle of her arms. Kara laughed softly as she went with the movement, her back to Alex's front. Alex breathed out her own laugh, her cheek pressed to Kara's shoulder before she moved back into their original position.

Watching Siobhan drunkenly proposition Alex, seeing the brunette land a sloppy kiss on the corner of Alex's mouth-- the pretty red head doing nothing to stop it-- that had been a tough blow. But then Alex had followed _Kara;_ had wanted to make sure that she was ok. That had to count for something right?

"So, you and Siobhan…" She started, voice unsure. They had moved into a slower sway, content to just feel each other after a while, the soft sounds of Sam Smith playing over the tiny speakers. Kara's arms crossed around Alex's shoulders, while the red head guided her by the waist.

"What about her?" Alex asked, face a blank mask.

Heat flooded Kara's cheeks. This was agony; surely Alex knew what she was asking? There was no way she had imagined it. Maybe she just didn't see the conflict? Kara was well aware of the mating habits of humans, but despite what the other employees at Catco had said, Kara had hoped that Alex would lean more towards a Kryptonian mindset of monogamy. For a Kryptonian, once they found the person they fit, they were bound; her species mated for life.

Humans were a bit more fickle.

"I just… It seemed like you two might have been leaving together that's all." She moved one hand to fidget with the curls at the front of her face, Alex's hand coming up and beating her to the motion before dropping to her chin.

"Hey, look at me please?"

The heat intensified in Kara's face, but she obliged, trying to fight down the nervous energy coursing through her. This was _Alex_ … she'd never hurt her before…. She couldn't live her life expecting people to hurt her.

She swallowed at the intense look Alex was giving her but forced herself to maintain eye contact.

"Whenever you want to ask me something, no matter what it is, just ask ok? I'm not always great at picking up on context clues in these situations and I'd rather not have any miscommunications between us, alright?"

The thumb stroking over her chin, helped to soothe some of her nerves, and she relaxed slightly. Melting into the touch as she nodded her agreement. The request was fair, if a little frightening.

"Did anything happen between you and Siobhan? Ever?" She asked, trying to be as clear as possible in her questioning. Like Alex said, she didn't want to allow any room for any miscommunications. If Alex lied now, it would be a clear lie, not one she'd be able to weasel herself out of later on.

"No." Alex answered without hesitation, voice clear and steady. "Nothing happened. She was drunk tonight and she tried to kiss me but that's it. I got her into an Uber and planted a bug on her and the car. I'll get an alert if she doesn't make it home or if the driver stays in her vicinity for too long. I also asked another Agent to tail her. That's about it. I was just making sure she got home ok. But I'm not attracted to her. I have no feelings for her. I wouldn't…" The agent paused, arms tightening around Kara's waist as she dropped her head to her shoulder. "I want you… I've never done this before but I just… I don't want to mess this up. I don't want anyone but you."

“But you left.” The words were out of her mouth before she could stop them, the sting from that morning returning with a vengeance. “This morning, after we… you left. I don’t… did I do something wro—”

“No.” Alex interrupted, fingers twitching against Kara’s skin and face pinched in sorrow. “No, Linda. You didn’t do anything, I promise. That wasn’t you, that was all me. I found out—there was just a shitty situation and I took it out on you and I never wanted that. I wanted to treat you like you deserve to be treated, not like—I used you, and I am sorry.”

Kara frowned in confusion. “But I wanted to. You asked me, and I said yes. I liked it. Why would you leave if I liked it?”

The agent looked away, face still set in sorrow and shame. “Because I was scared. And even if you liked it… Linda, I never want to touch you like that again.” Kara felt her stomach flip and tried to pull away. Alex wouldn’t let her, hazel eyes piercing as they focused in on Kara. “From now on when I touch you I want you to have no doubts of my intentions. And those are to show you every day how much you’ve come to mean to me. How I can’t stop thinking about you. How I want to talk to you all of the time. How when I read a new book, or comic, or play a new game I immediately think of sharing it with you.” Alex leaned in, the auburn of her hair, mixing in with Kara’s blonde strands. “How gorgeous I think you are, and how I want to kiss you always. Only you. I… I haven’t felt like this in a long time, and I want to show you how special I think you are. I want you to feel _that_ when I touch you.”

The words made Kara's heart beat double time and she couldn't fight the smile that pulled at her lips if she wanted to. And she didn't want to. CADMUS couldn't touch this. This was hers.

She wrapped her arms snuggly around Alex.

All hers.

"Me too." She mumbled into the skin of Alex's neck, drawing out a sharp shiver from the other woman. “But if it’s ok... I would really like it if you didn’t let other women kiss you anymore. Or you kiss other women—just me. I want you to only kiss me, if that’s ok?” She rushed out, voice slightly breathless in her anxiety.

The song switched and Kara found herself tuning into the lyrics to quell her anxiety.

“I think I can manage that.” Alex said with a squeeze of her arms, pressing a sweet kiss to Kara’s temple and pausing to soak in the moment. "Are we floating?"

Alex's voice was hesitant, but she waved her feet around in answer to her own question. Kara pulled back slightly staring into Alex's eyes as she offered a shy smile and brought her out over the water.

The water sprites trilled a greeting, jumping up to greet them while the wind sprites giggled in merriment. On land, the trees danced, glowing with green bodies that dodged between branches and leaves. Alex's eyes were wide with amazement, her face glowing in the lights and alight with happiness and wonder.

This.

This was what Kara wanted to do every day for the rest of her life.

To see that look, to be the _reason_ behind that look…

There wasn't all that much she needed besides that.

“ _I don’t deserve this, you look perfect tonight.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts? Concerns?
> 
> I told you there was a happy ending. Communication is key. Plus having a great support system like Alex is so blessed to have. Good for her.
> 
> Angsty Alex makes me sad; she's such a good person but she doesn't think she deserves good things... le sigh.
> 
> And my poor sunbeam Kara... I love her face. She deserves all of life's happiness.
> 
> Hopefully they both get it. 0.0
> 
> I really like Lena (not currently on the show cause grrrr (>.<)), I don't ship her with anyone really but I find her to be a really cute fun individual. And I loved when she went to check on Kara and Hank had to shapeshift and give her advice. Best scene this season. So she's going to be the start of Kara's circle of friends. Well, besides Winn. But I think its important that Alex have her friends and Kara have her friends and they can intersect and mingle but maintaining your individuality is way healthier than just globbing onto a significant other's friends imo.
> 
> Then we saw the party. The long awaited Christmas party... who saw that coming?
> 
> Sparky Sparky Boom Man aka Combustion man is a character from Avatar the Last Airbender. The original series with Aang; he was one of the coolest mercs ever. Unfortunately he was taken out by a pebble...
> 
> The whole thing with Alex and Siobhan won't be a thing. That was just Siobhan trying to gain some traction in her op. Unfortunately for her, our dear Agent is already head over heals for our Kryptonian love bug.
> 
> The song line at the end was from Ed Sheeran's Perfect and the elemental sprites were borrowed from Narnia and a ton of other fantasy novels that I've read.
> 
> So let me know what you guys thought. The next chapter is pure mush and then we see more action, angst, and despair 0.0
> 
> Thanks to anyone who comments, leaves a kudos, bookmark, or anything-- you guys are awesome!
> 
> ~Chronicles


	13. You’re the Closest to Heaven (that I’ll ever be)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the last chapter:  
> Alex woke up after a night with Linda and was understandably upset. Overwhelmed and in crisis she escaped to the DEO where Vasquez talked her off a ledge and went with her to an AA meeting.
> 
> Meanwhile, Kara got a peptalk from Eliza and Lena turned her into a Disney Princess.
> 
> Alex got a little jealous when she saw Lena and Kara together but she sucked it up and gave a proper apology.
> 
> Our two ladies were separated in the ensuing fight when Sparky Sparky Boom Man attacked the gala but re-met by the lake.
> 
> Kara was upset because Siobhan had put the moves on her girl but Alex squashed that quick, fast and in a hurry.
> 
> There was joy all around and Kara revealed her powers.
> 
> Now we get fluff.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! This chapter is pure fluff as promised. Enjoy it while it lasts.... mwahahahahaha.
> 
> Also, Happy Birthday to my fellow June babies and Gemini's, etc. etc.
> 
> Beta'd by Keziah thanks for working under crunch time.
> 
> Song is Iris by The Goo Goo Dolls

** You’re the Closest to Heaven (that I’ll ever be) **

"I should get you home." Alex said, feeling slightly off balance. She found she usually felt like that around Linda now and, while the feeling was new and nerve wracking, it was also exhilarating. Like when you got to the top of a roller coaster and you saw the drop, your belly may go straight up to your throat, but the excitement still made you eager for the plunge. "Thank you, for tonight… it was amazing."

Linda smiled, her hand loosely holding Alex's, eyes soft as they searched Alex's face.

"It doesn't have to be over." She said, hand going up to self-consciously fiddle with her glasses. "I mean, you did say that I should tell you when I'm hungry; and I'm kind of craving those pot stickers we had last week. We could go back to my place, watch a movie…" The blonde pulled her bottom lip between her teeth, words trailing off as a blush slowly stained her cheeks.

She was simultaneously beautiful and adorable.

Alex was a goner.

Her hand rose of its own volition, caressing the red skin. "I'd really like that."

Linda smiled, beaming at her as she turned to lead them down the street, hand tugging Alex along. They filled the walk with more talk of aliens; Linda’s knowledge was vast, and she filled in some cultural gaps that Alex just hadn't had access to through research and science alone.

She placed a call to a local Chinese restaurant when they were about ten minutes away from her apartment. It wasn't her favorite place, but it was the only 24-hour Chinese restaurant she knew in the area. They'd have to do. Linda's hand tight in hers as the blonde almost vibrated from excitement at the mention of her favorite new dish.

A happy energy flowed through Linda, calming Alex's frayed nerves all the way up until they arrived at her front door. Linda was telling her how the Lonobish males liked to sword fight with their penises. Apparently, it was a mating ritual for the species who were very open with their sexuality; it either turned the females on enough that they chose their mate, or the male decided he liked his fencing partner better.

It was one of the weirdest things Alex had ever heard of.

Linda told her it had helped stop wars.

Still weird.

“Do you mind if I get a glass?” Alex asked, moving towards the cupboards as Linda nodded and pointed to the one on the left.

And now, watching Linda settle at her bar island with a box of takeout in her hands, paying more attention to her food than Alex—as if Alex belonged here—it made Alex's heart clench.Her stomach did weird flips seeing Linda like this, hair down from the intricate style she’d had it in earlier and knotted haphazardly at the back of her head.She’d cleaned her face of the makeup she’d been wearing and was now happily barefoot; the only sign of the night in question the gorgeous dress that she had yet to take off.

Alex herself was still in her suit pants, but she’d taken off her shoes in favor of walking around in her socks and had taken off her dress shirt in favor of her plain white tee.She’d had to reapply the suspenders to keep her pants up, a move that Linda had watched with keen interest; the heat from the blonde’s gaze setting off an inferno low in Alex’s belly.

The blonde had made it sound so easy: win your penis sword fight and get the love of your life. Alex didn't have a penis, and she had no idea on how she was supposed to win Linda over.

She'd never really tried this before.

All she knew how to do was sleep with people and make breakfast. That was hardly enough to deserve someone like Linda.

She poured some water into the cup, dumping in some ice and taking a pull. Her hands landed on the countertop in front of her as she took in Linda's now puzzled face.

"We're keeping this PG tonight ok? Like Disney movie PG. No sex."

Linda's eyebrows shot up at the blunt statement, cheeks puffed out with food. She turned her head slightly in confusion but nodded her assent.

Alex took another drink of her water.

"Was I bad at it?"

The water burned as she choked, scorching her windpipe and nose.

"What?!?!" She gasped, hand rubbing at her chest to alleviate the pressure. Linda handed her a paper towel, looking mildly contrite and uncertain. "No! Absolutely not! You were amazing. Award winning performance. Gold medals all around. And that thing you did with…" Her mouth went dry at the thought of exactly how not bad in bed Linda was. She cleared her throat, setting the cup in her hand down on the counter next to her to avoid further injury and took Linda's hand in hers. "You were amazing. I'm just trying to protect you."

Linda frowned, food forgotten. "From what?"

Alex blinked.

Good question.

"I like kissing you." The blonde admitted, leaning further over the counter towards Alex. "It feels nice. It makes me feel good.

A strangled sound left Alex's throat at those words and the pure innocence on Linda's face.

"Linda…"

"Does kissing me make you feel good?"

And that's how Alex finds herself on top of a writhing blonde, swallowing moans and panting against kiss swollen lips.

~*~

“What happened here?” Alex’s fingers were as soft as her voice as she brushed a trail slowly down a scar on Kara’s shoulder.

The blonde hummed, pushing her head more firmly into the pillow as she enjoyed the gentle sensation. She’d never thought touch could be like this, relaxing- comforting, but with Alex… She never wanted Alex to stop touching her.

“I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.” Was what she said, content to bask in the attention she was receiving but not wanting to ruin it with lies… or worse the truth…

Alex chuckled lowly, moving her hand up to brush tangled blonde locks away from her lover’s face. Kara smiled dreamily and finally opened her eyes. Alex was so beautiful like this, hair disheveled and slightly cocky grin in place. Although night had well and truly arrived, Alex had left her bedside lamp on and the light reflected in her hair just so, sending shocks of auburn and mahogany through the loose strands. Her eyes were happy, the corners crinkling with her smile as she allowed herself to be relaxed and open. Kara especially liked the way the sheet barely clung to her chest, leaving Alex’s shoulders bare and available for Kara’s perusal.

“What do you want to know?” It was like Alex couldn’t stop touching her, her fingers making patterns and trails in Kara’s skin.

For her part, Kara turned over so that she was on her back looking up at the red head, trying to gauge how serious she was, but Alex’s expression remained open and peaceful. So, she bit her lip and took the plunge, “Everything.”

Alex hummed, resting her head on the raised fist of her bent arm and glancing off to the side. “Well I don’t know about everything,” she started, moving her eyes back to Kara’s face. “But how about we start with the basics and work our way up. Like maybe, how I really like reading. Prefer it over television; it never earned me any friends and the only reason I wasn’t bullied to kingdom come was because I was also really good at soccer.”

Kara grinned and pushed herself up further on the pillows, fingers reaching out to clasp Alex’s on her stomach.

“I’d really like to watch you play soccer.” She said, the visual causing her breath to catch. “Um… I never really watched tv growing up… but you knew that.” Heat rushed to her cheeks as she tried to think of something to say that wouldn’t conflict with her directives. Alex grinning and leaning in to press a kiss to her forehead certainly didn’t help.

“Hmmm… I hate apples, think they shouldn’t be allowed to be a fruit.” Kara snorted, amusement coursing through her even as she continued to try to find something normal to share. Alex must have sensed her dilemma because she gave her a gentle smile and ran her finger down the bridge of Kara’s nose, her lips following her finger. “Can I ask you a question? Would that be ok?” Kara nodded shakily as Alex’s breath ghosted over the skin she had just kissed. “…Are you a meta or an alien?”

Worried knots wove in her stomach as she looked up at Alex, the agents face remaining kind and patient. Kara had known what she was doing when she’d floated them up the way she had, but she was still slightly scared that maybe Alex would freak when she realized who she was.

What she was.

“Alien.” She confirmed, eyes searching Alex’s face for any sort of disgust or alarm. There was none.

Only empathy, Alex pulling her closer and wrapping her arms around her tightly.

She exhaled slowly, trying to calm her racing heart and inhaled Alex, her scent doing even more to sooth the Kryptonian.

They lay there for some minutes, Alex keeping her hold firm and pressing randomly timed kisses to whatever part of Kara she could reach, as Kara slowly relaxed into her embrace.

She’d never felt so safe; so _cherished._

This wasn’t supposed to be like this. They weren’t supposed to be like this. Katu had said to have fun; this was not what she had meant, it couldn’t be. Because if this was what she had meant, then Kara couldn’t even begin to imagine the extent of her friend’s cruelty. Being reminded that she was an alien had also dumped the ice-cold reality that she was Alex’s enemy on her head. When Alex realized who Kara was, she would never forgive her.

She was a botched experiment.

And even if Alex didn’t feel that way after learning the truth, what future could Kara offer her. This was temporary, it had a time stamp. Once Cadmus pulled her from the operation that would be it. She’d never see Alex again, not unless the agent signed on with Cadmus. And then she wouldn’t be Kara. She wouldn’t even be Linda Taylor.

She’d be K-2S0.

It was hopeless.

“There are things… that I can’t tell you ab…bout me. That I can’t—It’s not that I don’t want to b—b…but… can you be patient?” Kara licked her lips, trying not to let her anxiety over her stutter impede her to the point of speechlessness. She glanced up at Alex, whose face showed the epitome of empathy, and swallowed as she continued. “Until I can… find my words. There’s so much I want to tell you Alex. So much that I want to share with you…”

“Take your time.” Alex pulled her hand up, cradling it in her own and kissed it, lips skimming Kara’s knuckles and voice soft. “Whatever you can’t tell me right now, it’s ok. I get it. I don’t want you feeling guilty about it. You tell me when _you’re_ ready, until then you can fill my ears with everything else ok?”

Kara nodded, eyes on Alex’s mouth, still hovering so closely to her hand. “My parents died when I was a child… I lost everyone.” The sound of her own voice startled her, and she swallowed harshly when she realized what she’d confessed. “I am alone.” She bit her lip, pulling back and looking up at the other woman to gauge her reaction. “Alex…”

A firm kiss was pressed to her trembling lips and Alex pulled away only after she had started to respond, a gentle thumb rubbing a tear away.

“You are _not_ alone.” Alex’s gaze was intense, and Kara found herself unable to look away, the other woman gently stroking her cheek. Another series of soft pecks were pressed against her lips until she felt herself calm, hands gripping tightly to Alex’s wrists. “I was a tall kid.” The agent murmured between kisses. “Everyone used to call me a tree stump because I was tall with absolutely zero curves. I was a late bloomer.”

Kara sniffled, nuzzling closer to Alex. “I was… round.”

Alex let out a surprised bark of laughter, letting her body fall fully onto the mattress and pulling Kara snuggly against her so the blonde’s head rested on her shoulder.

“You were probably adorable, you still are.” Alex pinched lightly at her cheeks, stealing yet another kiss from Kara’s now smiling lips. “I had a crush on this girl, Vicky Donahue. She was my best friend and a total bombshell. She smelled like starburst, the strawberry flavor. I told her I liked her, and she turned into a complete bitch, so I made out with her boyfriend after school. It was gross, but I still feel weirdly vindicated.”

“How old were you?” Kara asked, voice rough as she brought her hand up to Alex’s collarbone, tracing the lines she found there… and taking surreptitious peeks at the swell of her breasts.

“I was 17. It was my senior year and I thought I should go out with a bang.” Kara giggled because, of course she had. “What about you? Were you a mischievous kid?” Alex asked.

Her hand trailed away from the collarbones, to Alex’s bicep following the lines of her muscles as Alex mirrored her movements.

“I was. I was always in trouble. My dad loved it; my mom was exasperated I’m sure. She used to say I was the reason my aunt had white hairs already.” Her brow furrowed as she dug into her hole filled memory for more answers. “I used to love climbing things, being as high as possible. I fell from the galley where my mom worked once, split my head open. That’s how I got this scar.” Kara fingered the valley between her eyebrows and smiled at Alex’s wince. Her smile grew when Alex pressed her lips to the spot shortly after. "What about your parents?"

Alex hummed, fingers tickling down Kara's side. "My parents were amazing. I loved them more than anything growing up. They were both scientists, so they were away a lot, and their version of quality time was letting me in on their latest experiments, but I loved it. I loved the puzzle behind it ya know?" Hazel eyes flicked to the side, Alex's face turning contemplative, brow scrunching in thought. "My dad… died when I was younger. At least that's what they told us. We never found a body. My mom took it really hard. Started drinking. She went to this psychologist that a friend recommended to her and he pumped her so full of anti-depressants and mood inhibitors that she became a ghost. He was a total quack." Kara turned her head, pressing a kiss into the palm against her cheek. "It took her awhile to recover after that, she's … she means well-- and she's a great mom. She's just…"

Kara accepted the helpless shrug as the end of the explanation.

She exhaled slowly, pressing her face against Alex's shoulder and prompting another forehead kiss.

"I don't really remember much about my parents. Or my family in general. I was too young I think, it's all faded. I get glimpses, flashes… but I remember my mom had a temper… I think my dad… I remember the best laugh. And I know they loved each other very much, I remember my dad telling me that he knew the moment he saw her." Alex smiled, and Kara counted it as a small victory, leaning further back to take in the beauty before her. "Was Vicky the first girl you loved?"

The scowl that came to Alex’s face was impressive and Kara smothered a giggle in the redhead’s neck.

“Definitely not. The first woman I _thought_ I loved, was the first person I slept with. She drove a Harley and smoked cigarettes, and nineteen-year-old Alex thought she was the coolest person that ever existed. … She was also a beast in the sack.” Alex said thoughtfully before yelping when Kara pinched her side, because seriously? The throaty chuckle that Alex let out after as she nipped Kara’s earlobe almost made up for the slight. Almost. “So violent. You don’t have to worry, that was years ago. My palette has definitely matured.” She murmured, nipping at Kara’s grinning lips.

And a heavy make out session progressed. Kara gasped as Alex’s tongue licked at the roof of her mouth, trying her best to chase the appendage but Alex kept teasing her with short flicks and quick bites.

“What about you?” Alex asked breathlessly, moving her thigh between Kara’s legs and thrusting.

“Huh?” Was Kara’s eloquent response. Seriously, Alex was dangerous. What she was doing had to be illegal.

“Have you ever been in love with a woman?” The agent inquired, still moving even as she moved her kisses to Kara’s throat, sucking sharply at her pulse. “Any ex-girlfriends ever touched you like this?”

Kara giggled at the sensation of Alex's kisses and the cool air on her skin. "No. You're my first."

Alex's teeth bit into the tendon at her neck and Kara's hips bucked.

The red head hummed, licking the bite and nosing back to Kara's lips. "So, I only have to compete with men? That should be easy. Just tell me their names weren't something stupid like Mike?" She nipped at Kara's lips, smiling when the woman in her arms tried to chase her mouth.

Her words reached Kara’s brain slowly, and even then, she was unsure of her response. “Oh. Um...” Her hands dropped to Alex’s waist and she flipped their positions, so she was on top, the sheet falling down around her and leaving her on full display. A view Alex obviously appreciated if the way she sat up and pressed reverent kisses to Kara’s chest was any indication. The other woman’s hands stayed in safe territory however, remaining on Kara’s hip or stroking over the smooth expanse of her back. “I don’t really want to talk about that.” She managed to stutter out through the wave of arousal that washed over her.

Alex hummed again, pulling her back down into another kiss. “Why? Not a good story?” Kara shook her head, trying and failing to again capture Alex’s lips when she pulled them away. “Wait, seriously?” She asked, concern bleeding into her voice as she brought her hands up to hold Kara’s head still.

The fog that had clouded her head at Alex’s kisses was slow to clear. “Oh, um no. Definitely not pillow talk.” She tried to move back in to resume their previous activities, but Alex held her firm, her eyes awash with worry.

“Linda…”

And they were back to square one, reality sinking in as Alex called her the wrong name. She wished desperately in that moment that she and Alex had met under different circumstances. That she was free of Cadmus so that she could be free to love this woman. Because that’s what this felt like. This is what she had imagined it would feel like. And Alex didn’t even know her name.

But she was looking at her like she saw her; like she really saw everything Kara Zor-El was. Like she knew who Kara was, even with the mask she tried so hard to keep in place. Like she might love her too. And for now, that could be enough for her.

She would fight to remember this moment. This perfect moment in time where Alex was seeing her. Where maybe Alex loved her. It was doomed, but she had experienced it. That would be enough. It would have to be enough.

She dropped her hands to Alex’s wrists again, moving close so that their foreheads brushed together, her blonde hair mixing with Alex’s chestnut. “ _You_ are my good story.” She said earnestly, making sure to look directly into Alex’s eyes; wanting the other woman to see her, to hear her. She wanted her to remember this too.

Reaching forward, her hands found Alex’s hair, fingers playing with the strands at the back of her neck as she was met with a kiss. Alex pulled her close, turning her again so that Kara was pinned beneath her. And Kara couldn’t protest, could barely think when her fingers slid into Kara’s soaked core.

_ I love you _ . She thought, Alex’s mouth gentle against her own _. I love you. I love you. I love you_.

~*~

Alex could admit that maybe she shouldn’t have brought up past lovers when they were… in the throes. But, in her defense, she hadn’t really even been paying much attention to what had been coming out of her mouth. Linda’s body was perfection.

Alex had truly never seen anyone more beautiful.

The raised pink scars on the other woman’s body only serving to add a devastatingly powerful element to her allure. Like when Alex’s parents had taken her to a wolf reservation as a child and one of the wolves, a rescue from a fighting ring, had been blind in one eye, a cut marking where someone had gotten the better of him. He had been the largest wolf on the preserve, his coat gleaming and body full of elegant muscle. His cloudy eye hadn’t made him ugly, not to Alex.

It had made her want to hug him.

It had made her want to hunt down whoever had exposed him to such cruelty and return the favor. She had still thought him handsome.

Just as she still thought Linda to be ethereal.

The fact that she was now going to do some light digging into the blonde’s past and find out who had hurt her and dismember them slowly… well that was a moot point.

The blonde smiled at her as she tugged on Alex’s dress shirt from last night, the bodice just a bit too loose over her less ample chest. Alex licked her lips at the memory of those breasts, now covered from her view, and moved over to Linda’s dresser to distract herself.

Now that she knew the blonde had been hurt in the past and it was no longer just a hypothesis she had made based on behavioral patterns, she wanted more than ever to get to know her better. To provide herself as a safe haven for Linda’s thoughts, dreams… body.

Everything.

Alex wanted all of it.

She pulled on a Henley she found in the corner of the drawer, sighing happily when it fit and then making another sound of pleasure when Linda pecked her cheek from behind her.

“Hurry up, your mother wanted to have Christmas with you and it’s already almost ten.”

Alex groaned at the reminder but followed behind Linda as the blonde moved to the kitchen. “Can I at least have pants?”

Linda glanced over at her from her position by the fridge, eyes raking over Alex’s half-dressed form less than innocently. “No. I don’t have any that would fit you.”

Chuckling Alex moved to help the woman start their breakfast. “Yeah, I’m sure that’s the reason.” She stepped in front of Linda when she made a move towards the stove, eggs and butter in hand and a blush staining her cheeks. “Nothing nefarious at all going on in that head of yours, right?”

The blonde’s lips twitched. “Are you accusing me of something Agent Danvers?”

A shiver ran down Alex’s back at the title. That had sounded ridiculously hot coming from Linda’s mouth.

“I wouldn’t dare Ms. Taylor.” She grabbed the woman by her shirt, tugging her closer and leaning up slightly to ghost her lips over Linda’s mouth. “Besides, I’m a firm believer in giving a woman what she wants.”

Linda moaned, the items in her hands dipping slightly as she swayed towards Alex. The agent’s lips now hovering just so over her jaw and neck.

“Alex… your mom.”

“I’ll be quick, I promise.” Alex husked, leaning in to press a soft kiss to her pulse, her chin… her mou—

A loud yip pulled her from her Linda induced fog, startling her and sending her flying back. She would have fallen to her ass if Linda hadn’t sacrificed the butter in order to catch her, tugging her back firmly into the blonde’s body and face first into a puppy’s ass.

“wuh da fu?!?” She sputtered, pulling away and glaring at the hairball on Linda’s shoulder. Linda herself looked pretty shocked so it’s not like she could be angry at _her._ Besides, she was finding the more time she spent with the woman the less angry she was in general. Hence why her next statement lacked it usual vehemence. “What the fuck is that?”

And then Champ was turning his body to smile at her, tongue lolling from his mouth in triumph. What a shit.

“Are you ok?” Linda asked putting down the eggs and stepping closer to Alex, hands hovering over her body as she looked her over. “I’m so sorry, I swear I didn’t know they were here.”

Alex frowned, but let Linda take her hands and pulled them to her own mouth for a kiss. Wait… “They?”

A small yip from her feet had her looking down at yet another Nalgene wolf pup, this one way cuter than Champ could ever hope to be. She totally wasn’t bitter about him cockblocking her earlier.

She gave a soft smile and bent to pick the pup up in her arms. The puppy came willingly, snuggling deep into Alex’s chest and going boneless.

She couldn’t help the sound of awe that escaped her after that. “Who is this?”

Linda smiled, setting Champ down near a bowl of water and stepping closer to Alex to scratch behind the puppy’s ears.

“This is Wren. She’s Champ’s big sister. First in her litter and one of Fiora’s three surviving children.” Her eyes grew sad and she dropped her hand to the metal brace on the pup’s leg Alex had felt earlier. “I accidentally attacked her the first time we met—I didn’t mean to hurt her, she…” Linda bit her lip, pulling her hands away all together and looking as though she was steeling herself for Alex’s judgement… or punishment. “It was an accident.”

Alex opened her mouth to reply but before she could, Wren started wriggling in her arms, body turning towards Linda’s as she tried to reach the blonde. Alex handed the puppy over, Linda’s brows rising in surprise and then melting as Wren started licking her chin and yipping in turn.

“What’s she saying?” Alex asked, bringing her hand up to stroke in the thick fur on Wren’s back.

“She’s saying I’m silly and that I shouldn’t hold onto the past. She says she forgave me a long time ago, and that I’ve proven that I’m a good person. I don’t have to punish myself anymore.” The red in the blonde’s cheeks was impressive at this point, Linda ducking her head slightly to hide some of her embarrassment.

“Can’t say I disagree with her.” Alex said with a smile, leaning in and stealing a kiss from her girl… which turned into three kisses. Another yip pulled them away from each other and Linda handed Wren back over to Alex in order to return to cooking.

“Apparently, she and Champ have been following you around. Or well, Champ has been following you. Wren’s just been trying to keep the big lug out of trouble.” Linda cracked 8 eggs into the pan, whisking them into a yellow foam as they began to cook. “He thinks your hopeless.”

Alex scowled down at the pup on the floor and swore that he was laughing at her, tongue lolling out of his grinning mouth.

“Well I think he’s an asshole.”

Laughing, Linda sped through chopping some vegetables, her hands moving much quicker than a human’s. Alex had seen faster but she felt warmed by the display anyway. Apparently now that Alex knew her secret she had no qualms about hiding her abilities.

“Champ’s got a good heart. He’s worried about you… he um…” She flashed a quick smile over to Alex, adding the vegetables to the nearly cooked egg pancake and flipping it in half with a quick flick of her wrist. “He kind of thinks you’re his pet.”

Alex blinked, the fingers that had been scratching behind Wren’s ear halting abruptly. “He what?!”

Linda plated the omelet and cut it in half, setting it on two plates on her table and placing Champ next to one.

“It’s a compliment Alex.” Grumbling, Alex placed Wren next to her brother. The nicer pup, eagerly wolfing down the food in front of her. She must have watched them for longer than she thought though because a second later, Linda was handing her, her own omelet. “He thinks you’re cute.”

“I am not cute.” Alex argued, face twisting into a scowl.

“I think you’re very cute.” Linda laughed, pulling her close by her shirt and pressing a kiss to her pouting lips. “Is that ok? That I did that?

Alex nodded, tugging the blonde into another peck.

“Yeah.” She breathed, hands setting down her plate and pulling Linda closer by her waist. “It’s more than ok. Feel free to kiss me whenever you like.”

Linda beamed at her and pressed another hard kiss to her lips before pulling out of Alex’s arms to get the last omelet.

Just in time too as Champ was starting to side eye her plate.

“I see you.” She warned. “If I’m your pet that means you have to feed me, so no touching!”

The Nalgene pup visibly deflated, Linda’s laugh ringing through the kitchen.

~*~

Kara fidgeted with the bag on her right side nervously, Alex’s hand clutched tightly in her left hand. This was it. Her and Alex were maybe together now. The agent had been there when she’d woken up; had _stayed._ They’d talked, and Alex had said she didn’t want anyone else but _her._

Even with all of that, she still found herself unsure as they walked over to Alex’s apartment. Alex had resumed her dress pants and shoes from the night before but had opted to keep on Kara’s shirt. She’d said the dress shirt was uncomfortable and left it on Kara’s bed.

Kara was pretty sure she’d just liked the way ‘Linda’ had looked in said dress shirt and was looking forward to repeat performances.

She smiled at the thought.

Next to her, Alex was lost in her own thoughts, some of the tension from the day before returning to shadow the Agent’s face.

“So…” She started uncomfortably, swallowing against the fear lodged in her throat. Putting herself out of her comfort zone was way better than watching Alex start to descend back into her dark place. “This is kind of my first Christmas. Is there anything I should know?”

Alex blinked and then looked up at her from furrowed brows. “Seriously? But you got presents. Which is totally cheating by the way. Gift exchanges are supposed to be determined in advance.”

Kara blanched, her steps faltering as she considered her faux paus. “Really?! Oh no. Should I take them back?”

She turned, intent on going back to her place to hide the bag of gifts deep in her closet when Alex tugged her back.

“No, calm down Linda, I’m kidding. It’s good that you thought of doing something so nice.” She leaned over and pecked Kara’s cheek, a small smile coming to her face. “Mind, you don’t _have_ to give gifts but it’s wonderful that you thought us worthy of them.”

Blushing, Kara tightened her hold on the bag, a paper contraption that was slightly bigger than her torso. She had a few gifts that she had made for her new friends; Eliza, Winn, Alex, Maggie, Lena, Cat, Mon-El, M’gann, and James. She had also made something for Alex’s nephew Jonathan. Even though she had never met the boy, Alex had talked of him often and the obvious love she felt for him was evident in everything she did. Kara felt like _she_ knew him. Plus, in her research of relationships it was said to be good to get in with any children involved.

“I… didn’t really have anyone to teach me my culture… not until I was older anyway and even then, I didn’t have anyone to celebrate with. Ni and Fiora and the others at the camp, they let me join their celebrations… but no Christmas. I thought about what to get everyone for days but… I couldn’t figure it out with Mon-El. Maybe you could help?”

Alex laughed, pulling Kara into the entrance of her building and through to the elevator. She had that look on her face that she got when she was _especially_ pleased with something Kara had done or said.

“That oaf is obsessed with ‘The Princess Bride’. Watch that movie and you’ll have all the ideas in the world. And anyway, I’d imagine there wouldn’t be too many people at the camp that celebrated the birth of a human.” She whispered, eyes dancing humorously. “I am super impressed that you read up on everything though. Just to be clear, my family isn’t really all that religious. We mostly celebrate for sentimental reasons than anything else. My best friend Felicity is Jewish and she’s way more serious about Chanukah.” Kara nodded, pretty sure that if she were human she’d be sweating. Alex tugged her hand, the elevator doors closing in front of them and showing their distorted reflections. “Hey… stop with the nervousness. You’re amazing. Everything about you is… and my mom already likes you way more than me, so you’ve won that battle.”

Kara felt something loosen in her chest, and she smiled down at the woman by her side. “Amazing huh?”

The look on Alex’s face was something akin to awe and confusion, her eyes boring into Kara’s as she whispered her response. “Beyond anything I’ve ever known.” She pressed her face into Kara’s shoulder. “You don’t have anything to prove to anyone. Just be yourself.”

“Ok.” Kara murmured, her nose flitting over Alex’s hair. Her human smelled divine, a combination of their mixed scents and the floral bath soap she had used that morning.

…Well that _they_ had used. Shared showers were Kara’s new favorite thing.

The elevator dinging brought her out of her moment of peace, and Alex immediately pulled away from the intimate embrace, although her hand remained in Kara’s.

When they entered the apartment, Kara was immediately overwhelmed by the amount of _food_ that Eliza had prepared. Her mouth watered at the spread in front of her and to her horror, a resounding growl came from her stomach.

Alex’s chuckle was mirrored by Eliza, who pulled Kara into a hug immediately.

“It’s so lovely that you could come Linda. I’m afraid dinner isn’t quite ready yet, but I’ve set some lunch items on the table. Hopefully it doesn’t spoil your appetite too much, Winn said I overdid it.” She pulled back and cupped Kara’s cheeks, her smile exuberant as she glanced between her and her daughter. “I was just so excited when Alex didn’t come home last night.”

“MOM!” Alex face palmed, a groan coming from her as she scowled. “Are you kidding me? Can you be any more embarrassing right now?”

Eliza only laughed, kissed first Kara’s cheek and then Alex’s and returned to the kitchen. Correction: skipped to the kitchen.

Kara smiled. Maybe Alex was right, and Eliza _did_ adore her.

“Hey Linda!” A red-head popped up from behind them and Alex yelped, her body moving closer to Linda’s as she eyed the newcomer with alarm. “Maggie’s told me so much about you. Alex too, but that was mostly longing sighs and dreamy expressions. Took a lot to translate it. Maggie actually uses words.”

Alex balked, her face turning bright red as Maggie strolled over with a plate of grilled cheese sandwiches. “That’s cause I’m evolved baby.” She said with a wink at the other woman before she floated the plate in front of Linda’s face. “Eliza made these up special for you. She didn’t want you to feel left out of the festivities of those meat eaters.”

Kara grinned and took a sandwich as she turned inquisitive eyes towards the red-head. “I’m sorry I’m not sure—”

“Kat Kane.” The woman interrupted, easily separating Kara and Alex and slipping her hand into Kara’s now free one. “I’m Alex’s moral compass.”

Kara frowned, head tilting in question. “Does she need one of those?”

“Ok that’s enough!” Alex’s palm was sweaty as she reclaimed Kara’s hand pulling her further into the apartment and tugging her down onto the couch. “Don’t you jerks have something better to do than ruin my life?”

Maggie plopped down on the armchair, Kate easily maneuvering herself onto her lap. The detective had just opened her mouth to retort, a teasing smile dancing on her lips when Winn came out of the bathroom.

Kara felt her own smile come on her face at the sight of her friend, a happiness mirrored on Winn’s face as well. Or at least that was what she originally thought.

Winn’s exclamation of “presents!” and subsequent bag snatching basically told her otherwise.

“I hope you got him coal.” Alex whispered from her side, eyes glaring at Winn as he dug through the packages.

“Is that customary?” She whispered is turn as nervousness swam in her belly. She wanted this to go well. Aside from the fact that it might be her only opportunity to celebrate such a holiday, she liked seeing her friends happy. If she had messed up somehow…

Alex’s noise of dissent pulled her from her spiraling thoughts. “No. It’s only given to people who are jerks. …But he would have deserved it.”

Kara laughed, leaning in and pressing a kiss to Alex’s pouting lips. The agent flushed red and pulled away, body tensing with her obvious discomfort.

Before she could ask what was wrong, Winn was shoving a perfectly wrapped box into Alex’s hands. Alex flinched, but smiled down at the box.

“Did you have these gift wrapped too?” She asked, turning the box this way and that so that she could take in the crisp lines of the folds of the paper.

“No. I watched YouTube tutorials.”

Alex shook her head and started pulling gently at the tape. “Of course, you did.”

Winn’s squeal brought Eliza from the kitchen, the man positively ghostly as he stared down at the object in his hands.

Kara fidgeted nervously as everyone glanced between her and Winn.

“I know it’s used,” she started, tugging on her sleeves at the attention. “But it’s still in really good condition. And I didn’t need—”

Winn ran at her, Alex expertly standing and moving out of the way to avoid the collision. Kara felt slightly betrayed at the move until she felt herself being engulfed in a hug, Winn swinging her body in his excitement.

“Thank you!” He bounced her, Kara forcing her body to relax to allow him to control her movements. A decision she wasn’t sure she would keep as her head flopped around on her neck. “Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! You are the best friend in the entire galaxy!”

“Hey!” Alex’s indignant cry was ignored as Winn giggled like a school girl, releasing Kara and taking in the Nvidia Tesla graphics card that was in his hands.

In reality, Kara had put in a request for a new chip on the assumption that hers was going to die. Which it was… just not anytime soon. She’d given Winn the one that had been sent to her, making sure to ditch the packaging and leave an extremely slight scuff on the metal casing.

“Wow, Linda this is awesome.” Maggie was looking over at the gift in Kate’s hand. The detective smiled over at her and nodded once sharply. “Ok that’s it. I already felt bad that we didn’t get you anything but now, we’re adopting you. You’ll be a Sawyer-Kane by this time next year. Babe contact your lawyers.”

Kate shook her head, the silk scarf that she held in her hands flowing easily between her fingertips. “I’m on it… not to be rude but what is this made of? It’s so soft.”

“It’s a Bartenian silk.” Kara said, most of her earlier nervousness gone as the people around her responded positively to her gifts. “I just… Maggie said that you liked pretty things, and this was pretty… and bulletproof.”

And yeah… the nervousness was back as all eyes turned back to her.

“What’d you get mom?” Alex asked resuming her seat and retaking Kara’s hand in her own. Kara smiled at her gratefully, and Alex gave her hand a quick squeeze.

“Well,” Eliza started, catching on to what her daughter was doing with a smile. “Let’s see it looks like…” She blinked down at the package in her hands before looking back up at Kara with tears in her eyes. “Excuse me.” She whispered, crossing the room and striding through the balcony doors.

Crap.

“Mom?” Alex asked, frowning when she only got a flapped hand in reply.

Feeling slightly breathless with new anxiety, Kara tugged on her ear. “Sorry…”

“Hey, no worries kid. If she didn’t like it, she would have been way more polite. Whatever it was, was probably overwhelmingly good.” Maggie grinned at her, before pulling at her own box. She laughed heartily when she saw what was inside. “How’d you even get a hold of these? Hongilo earphones really? These things are guarded more than children.”

Kara shrugged sheepishly. “I know a guy.”

Which she did. Bob was extremely well versed in trading and Kara had given him her silly straw collection in return for the listening devices. Hongilo earphones allowed one to either mute the world or tune into its every frequency. Kara, as a Kryptonian, did not see the appeal. She had hoped Maggie would.

Maggie laughed. “Of course, you did. Now I can choose to either tune Alex out or listen to her wax poetic about you from halfway across the world. …do you think I could sync these with my phone? I bet the music quality would be amazing.”

Winn’s eyes lit up and he started an animated conversation with the detective on the possibilities.

“Hey.” Alex tugged on her hand, pulling her up and towards the bathroom. “Come here for a sec.”

Kara swallowed when the door closed behind her, her heart starting to beat in triple time. But then Alex was setting her box on the closed toilet seat and tugging her head down into a kiss.

She sighed, something settling in her chest at the feel of Alex so close. Her hands clutched in the fabric at Alex’s waist and she pushed further into her, trying to get as close as possible. Teeth nipped at her lip and she whimpered, her knees shaking slightly as the blood left her brain. Alex smiled, pulling away just enough that they were able to look at each other without going cross eyed.

“Thank you for that. I know they’re not all your friends or your family even but… it means a lot that you listened so well and thought to get them anything. You didn’t have to—but it still means a lot.”

Kara smiled softly, hugging Alex close and burying her face in her neck. “They’re your family. Making them happy makes you happy. I don’t need much more than that.”

Alex’s arms tightened around her, a note of disbelief coming from her voice. “Where did you even come from?”

“Mars.” Kara said with a chuckle, pulling back with a sharp laugh when Alex blew a raspberry into her neck. “ALEX!”

Another kiss interrupted her indignation and she smiled, finally feeling more herself.

“I know a Martian. You ma’am are nobodies Martian.” Kara giggled again and got kissed as punishment. “What did you get my mom?”

Biting her lip, Kara peered at Alex from under her lashes. “a painting.”

Alex nodded, mouth pressing into a thin line in thought. “Old people tend to get super emotional about those things.” Her eyes brightened. “What’d you get me?”

“The Buffy the Vampire Slayer DVD Box Set.”

Alex blinked, excitement starting to twitch at her lips. “Seriously?”

“No.”

Kara laughed at Alex’s pout.

“Brat.” Alex muttered, pulling out of Kara’s arms and grabbing her present. “You’re lucky you’re so pretty, otherwise I would have left you alone with Maggie and Kate. See how much you appreciate me then.”

Moving behind her human, Kara wrapped her hands around Alex’s waist as she peered down into the open box.

“I read that it was customary to handmake your intended’s gift… only I didn’t know of any crafts that you would like. So, I thought this would be ok?”

“Intended huh?” Alex questioned, her eyes scanning the contents of the box.

“Yes.” Kara whispered into her neck, heat returning to her cheeks.

When Alex seemed more confused than happy, Kara refocused on the present in front of them. Taking in Alex’s expression she reached in and pulled the metal cylinder out herself. She’d built a hand rest into the hilt, that doubled as a cooling station. The heat from the chemical reaction taking place inside would normally hurt a wielder, but Kara had isolated the grip so that all the heat flowed up and away rather than towards it. The body of the handle was a matte silver, made of a Kryptonian alloy to be able to maintain the force of the plasma field she was generating. On one end was the pommel, a gleaming flat metal face; the other held a glass lens.

She pointed the glass covered end away from Alex’ body and towards the open space that led to the shower/tub combo before pressing her thumb over the hilt. A small vibration ran through her hand as the device recognized her and burst into life.

It had taken her _forever_ to replicate that sound. Real plasma ions didn’t zoom and vroom into existence. They just… existed. The molecules surrounding the plasma were literally lit on fire and so there was a very dull hum as they screamed in agony, but it was nothing like what could be heard in the movies.

And, building a plasma sword, or in this case, a lightsaber, didn’t really allow for much room for sound effects. The sound was now tied to the release switch, the weapon would be almost silent otherwise. Alex would have to deal with the slight imperfection.

Speaking of…

The agent’s face was alight in a purple glow, her eyes and mouth wide open as she stared at the weapon in front of her. Kara gently rotated her wrist, letting the agent take in the nearly perfect cylindrical blade from all angles. Controlling the length and shape of the beam had been a …headache, but the lens had helped with both. And attaching modifiers on either side of the hilt- one that directed the plasma out and the other that drew the plasma back in—had helped with that. Kara had actually gotten the idea from watching Winn mess around with a pair of magnets.

She removed her thumb and the blade dissipated, the smell of burning ions lingering behind and making her wrinkle her nose.

“Sorry about the smell, I didn’t factor that in. Maybe if I—oof!”

Her back hit the door, Alex’s hands fisting in the fabric at her chest as she pressed her there. All of that would have been extremely shocking and maybe Kara would have questioned her, but then there was the part where Alex was _kissing_ her. Like kissing her, kissing her. Like maybe they should _not_ be doing this where her mother could potentially hear them kissing.

The auburn-haired woman pushed forward, her leg sliding between both of Kara’s and _pressing._

Rao.

Rao, Rao, Rao, Rao, Rao.

Kara whimpered, hips moving on their own accord as Alex dragged her mouth down to Kara’s throat, her hands dipping under her shirt and caressing the marked skin she found.

“God Linda. Are you insane? A lightsaber?” She attacked her mouth again, her hands dropping to Kara’s hips and tugging her more firmly against her thigh. “Nothing will ever top that. You’ve ruined me for gift giving for the rest of my life. God. You’re so fucking perfect.” Alex kissed Kara hard, the small sighs the blonde was making apparently making her even rougher. “I can’t even show those idiots out there, they’ll be too jealous… and suspicious. Geez, how smart are you exactly?”

“I don’t know.” Kara murmured, heat flooding her body as Alex continued to kiss her. Excitement made her short of breath and she had to pull away as the fog in her brain entered dangerous levels. She had discovered that she really enjoyed sex with Alex. Sex with Alex was amazing. But the brunette was not a quiet lover and Kara had no desire to be caught in a bathroom by Eliza.

She dropped her head to Alex’s neck, hands resting on Alex’s shoulders to hold her in place. The agent chuckled, pressing a kiss to her temple and hugging her tightly.

“Best girlfriend ever.”

Kara’s head popped up at that, eyes wide and dazed. “Girlfriend?”

“Of course, silly.” Alex nudged her nose, bringing their faces close together and allowing her fingers to dance at the line of Kara’s waistband. “I told you, I want to do this right. That means titles and all. I’m all in. …besides no way am I letting you find someone else when you just built me a fucking _lightsaber!”_

Kara laughed, her heart light as she pressed kisses to her human’s face. She really liked this “Christmas”.

~*~

Alex couldn’t stop smiling, which was entirely confusing since less than 48 hours ago she had just discovered her deceased father wasn’t so deceased. She liked to think of her current situation as ‘the Linda effect’.

Her girl had everyone smiling, including Alex’s mom who was usually slightly dimmed during the holidays. Eliza was positively joyful now; her entire demeanor exuding the Christmas spirit as they sat around Alex’s living room and watched old Claymation movies about Rudolph and Santa Claus.

Her issues with her dad, the grief that had sent her hurtling head first back into a bottle, had left her reeling. She’d felt completely uncoordinated, spiraling in a black abyss with no way out. Vasquez had helped. The AA meeting at least reminding her of where she had been and where she didn’t want to return to. Lois had _just_ started talking about Jon maybe spending some time with her, and she’d been ready to blow that to hell.

Technically, she _had_ blown it to hell.

But having the people she loved around her, having them support her and hold her up when she couldn’t find the floor—that was everything.

No matter what happened with her dad, she at least knew that she had that. Her eyes met Maggie’s over Linda’s blonde curls and the detective winked at her, giving a supportive smile before returning her attention to the TV.

She’d start working on her dad’s case tomorrow. Right now, she wanted to focus on her first holiday with her _girlfriend_.

She really liked the sound of that.

Linda was sitting next to her on Alex’s sectional, her head resting on Alex’s shoulder and a bowl of caramel popcorn in her lap. Maggie and Kate had reclaimed the one-seater after dinner while Eliza had chosen to stretch out on the attached lounge seat. Winn had sat in front of Linda, fidgeting with something on his laptop.

Rudolph and his elven friend, Hermey banded together to begin their new adventure, their song about misfits causing Linda’s body to vibrate with her laughter.

“ _We’re a couple of misfits. What’s the matter with misfits? That’s where we fit in.”_

Alex pinched her ribs, her arm wrapped loosely over the woman burrowed in her side and she dipped her head to press a kiss to her hair.

“Hush you.”

Linda only laughed more.

Feeling someone’s focus on her, Alex looked up and met her mother’s eyes. Eliza had a soft look on her face that looked part happy and part wistful. Alex offered her mother a small smile and Eliza cleared her throat, looking away from the couple and standing abruptly.

“Who’s up for a second round of presents hmm?”

Winn perked up immediately, standing and moving to help Eliza as she started gathering boxes in her arms. Neither Alex or Eliza had been in the mood to get an actual Christmas tree, so they had instead opted for a cheap plastic green tinselly thing that was the size of a desk plant. It was hideous, but it got the point across.

Felicity had offered to have a tree _made_ for herif Alex agreed to burn the atrocity. The statement had only solidified her pseudo love for the fake ficus.

“Alrighty! Alex most of these are for you—don’t get too excited they’re almost all from your mom.”

Alex snorted but accepted the boxes from Winn, Linda moving to sit up as the packages did indeed take up a lot of room. Eliza tended to go a bit overboard these days. Ever since she had gotten _real_ help and set her life back on track, she’d been especially attentive where Alex was concerned. Alex figured she felt guilty, which was understandable. However, Alex bore no ill will towards Eliza for the brief stint into chaos. She’d reserved all her anger for the psychologist who had prescribed her mother unnecessary pharmaceuticals. One of the first things she’d done when she joined the DEO was to take the asshole down. As far as she was concerned, everything else was in the past.

Eliza had a harder time letting go so Alex was generally swamped with gifts every Christmas and birthday.

“Here you go Linda!” Winn set 2 boxes and a bag on the blonde’s lap, startling the woman and making Alex chuckle.

Linda let out a soft “oh”, her eyes wide as she regarded the gifts in her lap.

“They won’t bite.” Alex whispered teasingly, a smirk on her face as her girlfriend turned to glare at her. It was so odd, the pain and devastation she was feeling from the revelation that her dad was alive was still there, but it was almost muted by her family’s presence—by Linda’s presence. Feeling particularly brave, she slid her hand into Linda’s and pulled it up to her mouth, pressing a small kiss to the smooth skin on the back.

What she felt for this woman was powerful, and it made her insides twist when Linda’s pout turned into a smile for her.

Slightly off balance now, Alex turned back to the packages in her lap, and started going through them. It was all great stuff. Maggie and Kate had gotten her new sights for her gun, while Winn and Felicity had banded together to give her a ‘see me later’ note. That probably meant that she was getting some sweet new tech that they didn’t want her mom to see.

Sweet.

Eliza had gotten her a crap ton of beauty products; hair, bath salts, body scrubs and lotions. But she had also gotten her a new subscription to the Nature Genetics Journal and some maintenance equipment for her bike.

Smile in place at her family’s thoughtfulness, she turned to Linda who was staring down at the first box she had opened. A mason jar sat in one of her hands and a set of instructions neatly printed on a pink slip of paper sat in the other.

“It’s a sun jar.” Eliza said from her resumed position next to them. Her mother stroked her hand gently over Linda’s shoulder. “You mentioned not liking the dark, so I thought this might help. You place it in your window and the sun charges a solar light for you. When it’s night it turns on, and when morning comes it turns off. This way you’ll never be without the sun.”

Linda looked like she might cry, her throat working a few times before she managed a hoarse “thank you.”

Eliza simply smiled and returned to her presents, intuitively knowing that any further attention would only make Linda more uncomfortable.

Alex leaned over, taking the box that she knew was from Winn and setting it on Linda’s lap as she removed the sun jar from her girlfriend’s hands. The woman exhaled shakily but opened that present as well, her lips twitching as she took in the art supplies and faux leather canvas journal that Winn had boxed for her.

Linda dragged her finger almost reverently down the front of the smooth material, touching each pencil and charcoal piece in turn before raising her head to thank Winn.

Their friend blushed and shrugged, going back to playing with the original Gameboy Alex had purchased for him at a flea market.

“I’m a little jealous.” Alex offered as she took that present from Linda as well and set the remaining bag in her hands. “I’m starting to think my family knows more about you than I do.”

Linda smiled, turning her head and pressing a sweet kiss to Alex’s cheek that left the agent blushing. “I’ll tell you anything you want to know, I promise. They may know some small details, but you’ve _seen_ me.” She leaned forward, resting her forehead briefly on Alex’s temple. “I want you to see me.”

And Alex couldn’t resist going in for a small kiss, her anxiety with PDA be damned. Linda’s smile brightened even more, though the glassiness in her eyes remained, and she returned to the bag on her lap.

Alex had been painstaking in her search for a gift for Linda. She’d even started to annoy _Felicity_ who was normally very in to Alex talking about the object of her affection. Apparently, hearing Alex wax poetic about Linda’s smile and eyes and hair and laugh and _everything…_ well it got very old, very fast.

Even so, her friend had given her own insights and helped Alex select something that she hoped Linda would like. Alex was a practical woman herself, but she understood how other girls liked shiny baubles, and completely unnecessary artifacts.

So, she’d compromised.

And been cheesy while doing it.

The small wooden box bearing the etched writing, ‘it’s dangerous to go alone. Here take this.’, was the first part of the present, and would be reusable for any other small pieces of Jewelry that Linda decided to collect. The blonde chuckled at the words, having been inducted into the world of Zelda by the biggest fanboy alive, Winslow Schott Jr. Linda reached into the box and pulled out a dainty silver chain, a blue teardrop shaped gem sitting on the end and catching the light perfectly.

“Alex… this is so beautiful.” Linda murmured, her voice awestruck as the necklace dangled from her fingers.

Alex hummed her agreement, moving closer to take the necklace from the other woman and fit it around her neck.

“It’s turquoise, one of the oldest living stones known to mankind. In almost every ancient culture it was seen as a stone of protection, used to ward off evil and defend its owner from those who would wish them harm.” The stone dropped to sit comfortably between Linda’s breasts as Alex closed the clasp. Linda raised the stone in her palm, taking in the fine details and intricate patterns that swirled in its depths. “I got this one from a friend of a friend. John Constantine. It can’t be taken off by anyone with ill intentions and will protect you from anyone who wants to hurt you. I figured with you hanging out with the two most wanted women in America, it would be good to have some extra protection… plus I just thought it was really pretty.”

It was true.  Alex _had_ originally thought of the present for its protection purposes.  The idea had solidified when Linda had befriended Lena; the woman being a Luthor had put a giant target on anyone who even talked to her.  Cat had put a target on herself and didn’t really seem to care much but Linda was another story all together.Linda wouldn’t leave Cat _or_ Lena if it came down to it, so Alex had to take precautions.

“It’s gorgeous.” Linda turned and kissed her full on the lips, Alex blushing to the roots of her hair. Linda smiled, tugging gently on Alex’s right ear and pressing another kiss to her cheek. “I love it, thank you.”

Alex nodded, setting all the boxes around them on the floor next to her and turning her attention back to the people in front of her. She had to, otherwise she might blab that there was also a tracker in the necklace and she didn’t want to get in a fight with Linda on Christmas… especially not in front of their friends and family.

Also, she may have wanted to hold on to this happiness for just a little while longer, before her reality caught back up with her and she was forced to confront what remained of the man she’d called father.

~*~

  
  
  


Kara landed effortlessly behind a shipping container on the docks, doing a quick scan of the area to weed out any electronics and sentient life forms.

Satisfied that she had reached an area free from prying eyes, she stepped off the edge of the concrete platform and dropped soundlessly into the water below. There were a few things in which humans and Kryptonians were equal, swimming under water was one of them.

Kara was of the belief that this was mainly because, in the last few years of its existence, Krypton had had no bodies of water left that were safe for her people to swim in. Evolutionarily speaking the skillset would have left her species thousands of years before she was born. As such, she had been well aware of her capabilities when she had landed on earth, being warned away from large bodies of water since she was old enough to walk.

When CADMUS had questioned her about her species, after she had lost her ability to resist, she had explained that to them. They had been thrilled to know of a semi-weakness in her species that they could exploit. They had deemed it detrimental to their own pursuits to train her in any water tactics.

So, Kara had trained herself.

Once she had found Ni and figured out CADMUS’ limitations, she had begun planning a different future. Even before Kalasin, her most desired goal had been to disappear forever.

After Kalasin, it had been her only goal.

She sunk rapidly, letting all of the air out of her lungs so her body lost more of its buoyancy; that, coupled with her denser body composition, allowed her to reach levels humans couldn’t without specialized gear in a matter of minutes. It had barely been 5 minutes when she felt a sharp tug on her abdomen.

Kara was never quite sure where her pod was going to be, her nanny bot had taken to moving it around for her protection, but it was always near enough that she could be found.

And transported.

The familiar sensation of bending the dimensions swam over her body and when she blinked her eyes open, she was standing in the ever-growing living space that was once her pod.

The walls were white with one-way windows that displayed the ocean wildlife that floated by. Technically, her pod had upgraded itself to a ship using a combination of Kryptonian and Human technology to repair itself and make new additions. It had added about 7 rooms so far, each clearly marked with a contents label above the doorways. Kara had turned one of the rooms into a living quarters for her daughter. Were she more optimistic when she had been talking to Artax, she would have made one for herself as well. Unfortunately, she had never put much thought into her own survival.

She wanted Kalasin to live more than she didn’t want to die.

Sighing, she stepped into the largest room on the ship, her eyes taking in the sparse accommodations of the main hall and the Kryptonian computer that sat square in the middle.

This place was her true escape from Cadmus.

She called it Sanctuary.

Here, she housed everything her mother had been able to pack regarding her home, including DNA samples, the latest scientific and mathematical texts, stories and folklore, music and much more. All stored in various crystals that had been neatly stacked in an unbreakable box of Kryptonian alloy. Her pod may have been damaged in the blasts, but her culture was safe.

Had her cousin survived, his pod would have been able to repair hers more rapidly, his own nanny bot having selected him for the builder’s guild.

Unfortunately, CADMUS had shown her the other pod that had landed. Originally, they had thought it to be hers and the pod had been so damaged that she had been unable to disagree.

Then, Artax had found her and she’d been simultaneously relieved and devastated. Relieved because she was no longer alone.

But not being alone meant that her baby cousin, who she had been tasked to protect, had been in the pod that had been destroyed.

He was dead.

Sighing at the pain from the old wounds she moved further into her base of operations, stopping next to a podium and pressing her palm flat to it. Alex’s latest book recommendation, A Wrinkle in Time, had done much to help Kara in her pursuits, the science in the series helping her more than most of the nonfiction texts she had perused on the subject. She had an idea that she wanted to try.

She was typing in new commands for her console, verifying the stability of her ship when her Artax came to peer over her shoulder.

“That is very good work Great Scion. Your father would be most pleased. And jealous. He was working on a similar tactic to save Krypton’s population. He had not yet completed his attempts when the core destabilized.”

Kara palmed the robots head, shoving back and scowling. Artax had not learned the apparently human ideal of ‘personal space’.

“I know Artax,” She said, trying to keep the annoyance out of her voice. “You tell me that every time I come down here.”

The robot sniffed, it’s gleaming bluish silver body hovering to float in front of her. “Well, it’s no less true now. Your manners are becoming more and more human every day.”

Kara sighed, pausing in her actions to give Artax an apologetic smile. “I’m sorry Artax, I’m just a little stressed at the moment. I feel like we’re running out of time, and this still isn’t ready.”

Artax bobbed, the bottom half of his body wiggling slightly and the display in his ‘head’ presenting rapid fire lines of code.

“With everything you have just added, we have increased our chances of success by 20%. You have also decreased your completion date by 3 weeks.”

“3 weeks from four and a half years. Not exactly a win.”

Artax hummed.

“Perhaps one of your rude alien friends can help you.”

“I had considered it.” Kara gnawed on her lip as she looked over the plans in front of her. “Building a dimensional pocket isn’t really something they’ve done before… and I’ve told you a million times, _we_ are the aliens here.”

“I will not allow you to sully the House of El with such a term. Wherever we go, we are the new normal.”

Kara shook her head affectionately, Kryptonians truly had been arrogant.

“Can you load all of this for me on a human data drive? If I’m going to get help, I’ll need to be able to show them what I’m talking about.”

Artax paused, his little body practically vibrating with excitement.

“Did you bring it?”

Kara pursed her lips, arms crossing against her chest. “Are you seriously holding your skills hostage for treats?”

“Humans think that ‘good boys’ should be rewarded. I have been doing as you have asked, so I am a ‘good boy’.”

She squinted her eyes. “That’s a little below the Great and Powerful House of El, don’t you think?”

Artax wiggled his lower body again, “not if it means I get my treats.”

Grumbling good naturedly, she pulled a large canister up from where she had strapped it to her boot and handed it to the robot in front of her.

“There you go good boy, one helping of chlorofluorocarbons for you to devour.”

Artax let out a series of beeps, his floating appendages grasping the canister and securing it to his back. A low hiss was heard and Artax sighed in pleasure.

“You were always my favorite El, Great Scion. Please, your requested data chip is ready on the main console.”

Kara smiled, swiping the USB stick that popped up in front of her. Alex had taken everything much better than she had originally anticipated, maybe if she was able to show her this, something that CADMUS had no idea existed she’d at least be able to secure a future for them before Lillian enacted whatever plans she had.

Kalasin would be safe in a dimensional fold, any signals that Lillian would try to send being wholly inadequate to breach the barriers.

Alex could help; they could remove the chip and then start a new life.

She’d finally have a chance to be free.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy fun times.
> 
> So we saw Sanctuary! Yay! Kara's been hinting at her plans but now we finally get to see said plans in action.
> 
> But, from the top. Alex and Kara are so adorable aren't they? I love Alex here, just being all soft and loving.
> 
> Then Champ comes to ruin the partay. He's been here for a while but hiding lol.
> 
> Also, I'm not saying that something happened to Kara but I'm also not saying that it didn't. To ease all of your minds (maybe?) Kalasin is a test tube baby. But she did spend half her life in captivity and shit happens. You can use your own imagination processes.  
> Christmas presents abound! What'd you guys think about the lightsaber? I've been holding that for awhile and I was so excited to finally share this with you guys :) :) :)
> 
> Anyway, I'll be doing some construction and fixing some headers so sorry if you get some random updates. Best Wishes!
> 
> ~Chronicles


	14. Now You Know Me (and I'm not afraid)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, sorry for the delay. Had an issue at work that required a life sacrifice. I. E. The cooling system in my server room crapped out during a heatwave. It’s fine, its great even. So much fun.  
> Anyway here is the next chapter. It’s unbeta’d so I apologize for any errors. This songs my favorite :)
> 
> Song: I'm Still Here- John Rzeznik (from Treasure Planet)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So an over all recap:  
> Alex and Kara met as children when Kara escaped the decimation of Krypton and sought refuge on Earth. Alex and her parents took Kara in but unknown circumstances tore them apart. For years Alex has been searching for Kara as she blames herself for her abduction. She has tried drowning out her pain and guilt with alcohol but after a mission injures one of her own she’s put on bodyguard duty for Cat Grant instead.
> 
> Enter Linda Taylor, who Alex befriends and then beds. Love comes quickly and surely but through it all Alex is trying to figure out who the people trying to kill Cat really are. ALFA proves to be a hard nut to crack until Linda gives her a lead. Alex is beside herself and with Winn, Felicity and Maggie’s help she tracks down an ALFA agent to the sewers. Here she sees Jeremiah Danvers and makes a series of terrible decisions when she sees her supposedly dead father quite alive. After drunk fucking Linda she makes a decision to truly change her life and commits to AA and trying to be a real partner to Linda and a better role model to Jon, Clark Kent's son. He is one of the people she treasures most and she wants to be a better person for him, even though he already thinks the world of her. She constantly worries for him, and even though he is half Kryptonian and thus almost assuredly granted a healthy life, she still fusses over the slightest sniffle. Not so much for Clark, who she blames for her destroyed family.
> 
> Meanwhile Linda is truly Kara, only brainwashed to have forgotten her life. She is now a CADMUS agent who is also sent to take down ALFA and bring in Alex. During her mission to befriend the agent she falls in love and starts to reimagine her life as an escapee rather than a slave. Her best friend Katu supports her in this endeavor and Kara begins planning. Cadmus has held her daughter captive to control her so her options are limited but the longer Kara goes between a mind wipe and her Kryptonite injections the more aware of herself she becomes. At the moment Lillian Luthor has been preparing her daughter, Kalasin, for a life as a weapon. Kara is doing everything she can to make sure that doesn't happen.
> 
> Last chapter saw us celebrating Christmas and Alex got a lightsaber. Kara and Eliza bonded some more and Champ and Wren apparently think Alex is their pet. Completely reasonable conclusion and I personally believe her new caretakers are more than capable.  
> More awesomeness to come.

** Now You Know Me (and I'm not afraid) **

The following Tuesday, December 28 th found Alex at the airport helping Eliza with her luggage.One hand steered a large suitcase and the other held the wrapped painting that Eliza had gotten from Linda.The older woman tended to overpack as her scientific mind ran through a million scenarios and she liked to be prepared for each one.

Efficacy she called it.

Alex had wisely chosen to keep her opinion to herself.

Until now.

“Did you pack _all_ of your books mom?This thing weighs a ton!”Alex complained as she lugged the large suitcase onto the conveyer belt.The scale beeped and read at 65 lbs., Eliza turning and giving her daughter a bland look.

“Honestly Alex, I thought you worked out.I lift more than that in my aerobics class.”

Alex scowled, rolling her shoulder and moving with her mother towards security after she’d gathered her ticket.“I’ll have you know that I do work out!AND I lift more than that too, it’s just _normal_ people don’t have 60-pound suitcases.”

Eliza tsked.“Don’t forget what we talked about ok?You need your friends, let them in; keep them close.”

The line to the security check was long, so Alex joined her mother in the queue.She hadn’t wanted to admit it, but she had actually missed her mom a lot.Despite the fact that she thought Eliza could be a Grade A nag, she also knew that her mother loved her.

After this trip, she _knew_ that her mother loved her.

And with that knowledge came the desire to be honest.Eliza should know there was a chance her husband might be alive.Alex just wasn’t sure when she should tell her… or _how_ she should tell her.

Clearing her throat, she wiggled her arm with the painting, a 30x40 piece of canvas that was also heavy… maybe she _should_ do more weight training.

She’d start today; head to the DEO after this trip and start working with the trainers there.They’d have her back to lifting double her weight in a matter of weeks.

She was going to commit; no more slacking off and eating junk food.Maybe she’d go vegan with Maggie for a little bit; hop over to Star City and train with Oliver…

Maybe Kate would help… 

Instead of dwelling on her decline in upper body strength _or_ her mother’s statement, she pointed her chin at the painting.“You ever gonna show me this thing or what?”

Eliza’s squinted her eyes, mouth pinching as she took Alex in thoughtfully.Alex waited patiently, unfortunately used to her mother thinking she wouldn’t be able to handle things.Even after living a quarter of a century, her mother still treated her like a child.A few months ago, Alex would have grown irate, annoyed, and frustrated.Probably would have caused a scene if she was being completely honest, or at the very least found her nearest bar.Now though… that seemed kind of pointless.Eliza would still look at her like that, neither of those methods had ever worked, so she was going to start using her anger on meaningful things.This was impractical.

A hand reaching across her body pulled her from her reverie, and she easily handed the painting over to her mother, swapping her for her purse.

Her mother sighed quietly, her mouth set in a thin line as she carefully peeled back the tape holding the protective paper in place.

Alex had expected flowers, or scenery… a landscape perhaps.Maybe something super weird like an image of Alex herself.

She hadn’t expected this.

She understood why her mom had excused herself before.Unfortunately for Alex, they were in a very busy airport and excusing herself was out of the question.So she stayed where she was and fought back the lump that rose in her throat.The _fury_ that nearly consumed her.

“When I found her in your apartment that morning, I thought she was just another one of your… hobbies.But then she was so polite… and kind.”Eliza sighed, eyes not straying from the image on the canvas.“I started asking her questions and she stumbled through her replies… Given my standing in my field I’m used to people being nervous or intimidated around me, but she was… I didn’t want her to be afraid of me.So, I started making her breakfast, and then the topic turned to you and somehow it came up how scared I was when I sent you away to college.You were barely 17 by that point, and you’d decided you needed to travel to the other half of the continent for some inane reason.I told Linda that all a mother wants is to protect her child, and that being that far away from you… well, I felt like such a failure most times.”

Alex’s throat worked, voice rough as she pressed her forehead to Eliza’s shoulder.“You’re not a failure mom.You raised me, and I turned out semi functional.”

Eliza laughed, kissing her head and tracing reverently over the simple painting.

In it, Eliza was standing at the door in the Midvale home, the attention to detail that Linda had paid was immaculate.Everything was as Alex remembered, down to the broken plant pot on the steps.Eliza stood in the doorway, every line of her face clear even if she was in the backdrop of the picture.Set in the foreground was Alex, walking towards the viewer with a confident smile, backpack slung over one shoulder, and the letters MIT stamped proudly on the sweatshirt she was wearing.That would have been a beautiful picture in itself, but Linda had taken it a step further.

Jeremiah Danvers was walking besides Alex, his hands stuffed casually in his pockets as he took her in, a huge proud smile on his face… his own backpack hoisted on his shoulder.

Alex knew next to _nothing_ about art, but the painting before her, barely looked like a painting.It looked like a photo, like a snapshot of an event that had actually happened.Only, Jeremiah had been declared dead long before Alex had gotten her acceptance letter to MIT.They’d had his funeral almost a year before that actually.

And the fact that in the painting, he was _going_ with her…

“Linda is extremely easy to talk to.She must have done this because I mentioned how the only way I got through the worry some days was imagining your father watching over you—taking care of you when I couldn’t.”

Except he hadn’t.

Except he’d left his family; _abandoned_ his family.

Jeremiah Danvers was alive and well, and his wife and child had gone through hell for no damn reason.

Alex nodded dumbly, her throat painfully tight as Eliza rewrapped the painting.She was now next in line and it wouldn’t do to hold up everyone else’s efforts.

“Sweetheart… Are you ok?”Eliza’s hand rested on Alex’s shoulder as she asked the question and Alex again nodded dumbly.She couldn’t tell her mom that her husband was alive.There was no way that was an option.Not until she had more information.She needed to see Hank ASAP.Eliza pulled her into a hug.“I love you Alex.I’ll call you when I land, ok?”

Another nod.

Alex pulled her mother close, trying to convey how much she loved her.How even though Alex’s father had left them, Alex _never_ would.“I love you too mom.”She managed to mumble.

~*~

Alex had trained for two hours before the need to see Linda had overwhelmed her.A quick shower, text and bike ride later found her in the blonde’s bed, clear brown eyes looking at her in concern.

Linda lay next to her in nothing but a plain white t-shirt and panties, the sheets covering her lower half from Alex’s view.Her glasses had been discarded on the nightstand next to her and if Alex hadn’t been in crisis she would probably be getting lost in the cinnamon swirls staring so ardently at her face.

But she _was_ in crisis and she was tired.

Exhausted.

Alex had borrowed another t-shirt, her hair, still slightly damp, soaking into her own spare shirt that she had draped over Linda’s pillow.

“Thank you.”Alex whispered, unable to meet those eyes but playing with the fingers of Linda’s hand.“The painting you did for my mom… thank you.”

Her girlfriend nodded, face still pinched with worry.“I wanted to thank her for being nice to me, and being so welcoming… I haven’t really had a lot of that.And when she told me about your dad…how close you two were.”Linda wrapped her fingers around the hand playing with hers and brought it to her lips in a kiss.“Alex I’m really sorry.”

Alex exhaled shakily, swiping at her eyes with her free hand before squinting at Linda in accusation.“You never told me you were an artist.”

“Hardly.”Linda said with a snort.“It’s… a stress reliever of sorts.I’ve got a knack for colors.”

Alex shook her head.“You’re an artist.”She insisted, trying to work up the nerve to talk about the _real_ elephant in the room.“That painting was beyond adequate.You could make a career out of it if you really wanted to.”

Linda made a noncommittal sound in the back of her throat, eyes still wandering the planes of Alex’s face.“I like working for Ms. Grant.”

Alex snorted, her lips ticking up at the revelation.She chanced a glance up, Linda’s image slightly blurry through the tears in her eyes.“He’s alive.”She said, trying to focus on something else even as she spoke the words.“That first night that we…that’s the ‘news’ I got.I saw him when I was running recon on the people trying to kill Cat.”

“What happened?”Linda asked, moving closer to Alex and forcing the agent onto her back.

The maneuver distracted Alex enough that she was able to continue, instinctively opening her arms and allowing Linda to rest her head on her chest.“Nothing.I think… before he died he got mixed up with a shady government organization… I think he might be working for the other side.I had Maggie with me, I couldn’t—I don’t know what to do.I don’t even know where he is anymore.”

“I’ll ask around.Shady government organizations usually mean aliens, so someone might know something or have heard something.”Alex opened her mouth to protest but her girlfriend was already shaking her head.Linda’s hand ran over her abdomen, soothing her further and pulling her mind from its downward spiral.“Quietly.”Her head popped up, and she looked into Alex’s eyes.“Trust me?I know what I’m doing.”

Another protest was on Alex’s lips, but the words never came… they’d never truly formed.Her body tensed for a moment before she felt herself relax, accepting the inevitable.Because, as it turned out, she _did_ trust Linda.

Odd.

Not wanting to dwell on her newfound knowledge after such an emotional day, she simply offered a whispered.“Ok.”

Linda beamed at her and snuggled back down.Alex reached over with her free arm and turned off the bedside lamp, the sun jar that Eliza had gotten Linda for Christmas illuminating the room in a soft glow.

“Alex?”Linda questioned softly.

“Yeah baby?” Alex murmured back sleepily, thumb stroking the skin at Linda’s waist.

“Will you stay in the morning?Don’t leave, please.”

The soft plea forced Alex’s eyes open, her earlier foil in their relationship coming back to bite her in the ass.

“Hey.”She whispered, pressing a soft kiss to the top of Linda’s head.“I’m not going anywhere ok?You’re stuck with me now.Relationship Alex is super clingy.”

Linda giggled, her lips ghosting over Alex’s neck.“I can deal with that.”

~*~

Kara sighed as she made her thirtieth trip down to print to change yet another inconsequential detail.It had been exactly a week since the party at CatCo and Ms. Grant was _still_ punishing her.For what, Kara wasn’t sure, but she knew it had to have something to do with that event.The two had been fine during the party and yet when Kara had walked into work on Monday, it was like someone had possessed her boss’ body.

They hadn’t, Kara had checked.

Ms. Grant had called her all sorts of names _before,_ ranging from Lisa to a particularly creative Lucrecia.Now however, Kara had been relegated to a simple, Assistant Number 2.

That didn’t even make any sense!

She’d been here first, _Siobhan_ should be assistant number 2, not her!

It was crazy.

On top of that, Ms. Grant had her running the most ridiculous errands.Errands she wanted completed quickly and without excuses.And they were to be completed _on top_ of the workload Kara already had.

Needless to say, she was really starting to hate her job.

Lena was also mad at her, although she wasn’t taking it out on her in the same way Ms. Grant was.Lena’s ire stemmed from the fact that Kara hadn’t responded to _any_ of the CEO’s calls or texts the day after the party.

In her defense, she’d lost her phone in the shuffle and, even using Cat’s name, a new phone could not be sourced until Tuesday morning.Turns out, Christmas stock was limited on Christmas Eve… go figure.

Lena was gradually warming back up to her, but she still seemed wary.Like an easily spookable kitten.Even the collector’s edition of the Season One Game of Thrones DVD set that Kara had gifted her had barely put a smile on her face.

Her only saving graces had been Winn, who always offered her some form of candy when she returned from another wayward mission of Cat’s… and Alex.

Alex, whose apartment Kara had spent nearly every night at this week.Kara had been beyond hurt that first night, when she’d woken up with Alex’s scent and taste but not her body, but Alex had explained about her dad and so she’d held her stuff in.

Two nights ago, they had gone to Alex’s place and Kara’s emotions had finally gotten the better of her.This was the longest she’d ever gone without a check-in and her body wasn’t used to operating without her modifications.All that was keeping her emotionally ‘stable’, was her watch.

So, it was understandable that she’d started venting to Alex as they were getting ready for bed.Alex had listened patiently, brought Kara’s feet into her lap and offered her a massage.

She’d also offered to ‘talk’ to Cat but Kara had quickly declined.

It had felt good: venting.And it was currently the only thing keeping her sane.If she had to look at Siobhan’s stupidly smug face one more time…

“Siobhan.”Cat called, because yeah.On demoting Kara, she was now calling her _real_ second assistant by her _real_ name.“Assistant number 2.My office, now.”

Kara tried not to grumble as she rose, Winn offering her a sympathetic smile and Alex doing her impression of the Buckingham guard where she stood by the elevator.

This was going to be a long day.

~*~

Alex clenched her jaw, trying and failing to stop looking at Linda’s despondent figure in Cat’s office.She knew that Cat had been worried at the party, so she really didn’t understand this sudden flip in behavior.She was treating Linda like shit and Alex _really_ didn’t appreciate it.

But Linda had asked Alex to let her handle it, so she would.Her girlfriend was a big girl, so Alex would respect her wishes.

Even if it was driving her insane.

Trying to distract herself, she moved over to Winn’s desk.Now that they had resumed their friendship, she was once again welcome in his small domain.

“Any luck with that information yet?”

Winn spun around in his chair, offering a bright grin.“Yes, actually.”He turned back to his monitor.“As you have probably guessed, the event that our bad guys were talking about was _not_ theattack at Catco.For one, we’ve faced off against Metallo before.Those weird boomy men, were not him.”

“Obviously.”Alex muttered, eyes darting over to Linda once again as Siobhan pushed her way in front of the woman.“So, if they weren’t plotting the hit on Cat what _were_ they doing?”

Winn’s fingers typed in a few commands, and a new bank of screens came into view.“That’s where it gets interesting. Felicity thought it was still too much of a coincidence that Cat was attacked by aliens at the largest party in the city, so we looked at the window of when the attack started and followed to when it ended.Globally, there were only about 10 red flag events that occurred in that 15-minute window.”

Alex made a noise in the back of her throat.“That doesn’t seem like a lot.”

“It’s not.We’re getting closer and closer to cracking this thing open!I can feel it.”

Alex felt her lips tick at the man’s enthusiasm, her hand going to her pocket as her phone started to ring.“Don’t get too excited, you still have to tell me which one to investigate.”

“Aye, aye captain.”

Alex shook her head, finger pressing down on the accept call button without looking at the screen, her attention back in Cat’s office.

"Danvers."She answered, annoyance dripping from her tone as she watched Lena Luthor and Cat Grant rattle off a list of impossibilities to her girl.

"You are too close to my work agent.I suggest you walk away."

The voice was robotic, devoid of any human inflection.She kept her eyes on Cat as she turned back to Winn, smacking the IT guy on the shoulder to get his attention.

"I'm not sure I know what you're talking about."She said putting the phone on speaker and setting it on Winn's desk.Winn's eyes widened, and he immediately pulled up a black console window, typing in a series of commands to presumably start a call trace."Who is this?"She leaned over his shoulder, watching what he was doing, keeping an eye on Cat, and typing out a quick warning text to the agents posted on the roof.

"I'd prefer it if you did not play games with me agent.This is your last chance, walk away."

"I'm afraid I'm not so great at that.You see once I get started on a case, I just can't let it go.My boss says I'm like a dog with a bone.Insulting to some, but I happen to think dogs are cute.People get all tetchy about it though; they say dogs have germs… yada yada yada.I personally think they’re owed a bit more respect."

There was no response on the other line and Winn made a signal for her to keep talking.

"The germs, not the dogs.”Alex clarified almost absentmindedly as she watched Winn work.“Most people respect dogs, nobody respects germs.Even if it is the only culture most people have.Like you probably.You strike me as very cultured; very germy."Winn's fingers flew over the keyboard, the furrow in his brow deepening in frustration.

"Agent Danvers, you seem to have very little self-preservation, so allow me to warn you that if you do not cease your activities I will not kill you.I will rip out your heart and make you watch."

"Well isn't it just my luck.I was told I didn't have one of those."The second the words were out of her mouth, she felt like they were the wrong thing to say.

"I think we both know that isn't true agent."

She felt her heart clench and forced herself to remain calm as she pointedly ignored Linda's profile standing between Cat and Lena.

"Oh yeah," she questioned, voice steady even though her hands were white knuckling the back of Winn's chair."Do you know something I don't?Care to share with the class?"

Winn gasped, and Alex's eyes flickered to his screen.She froze, stomach twisting as a live video of Cat's office appeared on the monitor in front of her.

The video was clearly coming from across the street and Alex thanked the stars for Winn as the Agent immediately sent out the appropriate alerts to their teams stationed nearby.She shifted her weight to her back heel, moving to collect Cat and get her the hell out of the building, when the camera slowly panned in on the other blonde in the room.

Linda's face was crystal clear, barely any pixilation.The image so sharp that Alex was able to see the small smile she was attempting to hide behind her notepad as Cat chewed Siobhan out for some mishap.Her glasses moving slightly with the happy crinkling of her nose.

"She's truly beautiful, your Linda Taylor.It would be a shame if something were to happen to her."

"It would be.She's a great girl; not sure you have the right person though.I'm more of a Beyoncé lady myself."

Hearing a robot laugh was very disconcerting.

"Your denial is admirable Agent Danvers.However, we've been following you.We know where your affection lies.We know that you care for her.Drop your case.This is your only warning."

The line went dead.Winn groaning in frustration as his trace found no results.

Alex clenched her jaw. "Call Hank.Tell him what's going on.I'm getting Cat out of here."

Winn nodded, moving towards his phone, Alex already turning towards Cat’s office.The security team worked smoothly, and despite Cat’s protests, she was soon in a black SUV on her way home.As she was being dragged out of the building, she’d not so kindly dismissed Linda and Siobhan and told them to complete the rest of their work from home.

Lena had left with her security team as well.

With Cat safely away with Agent Jones, Alex was free to focus all of her worry on Linda.A few months ago, she might have tried to distance herself from the other woman, but now she couldn’t even imagine the separation.Linda had become so ingrained in her heart that pushing her away felt like ripping off her own limbs.She’d prefer not to do that.

Instead, she stayed as close to the blonde as possible as she got Cat out of the building.Linda never more than arm’s length away before Alex would somehow pull her back to her side, now solely focused on keeping her girlfriend safe. Or at least she would have been, if Lucy Lane hadn’t cornered her on her way to getting Linda the hell out of dodge.

Logically she knew that an attack directly after such a call was unlikely.They’d probably want her to sweat it out, and then strike when she’d run herself tired.

Emotionally, all she knew was that Linda was in danger.She needed to get her out of danger.

“I’m a little busy Luce.”

“I can see that, but it’s about Jon.”

Alex froze, her hand clenching around Linda’s, her girlfriend standing next to her with an anxious look on her face.

“What?”She asked breathlessly.Lucy never spoke to her about Jon.Lucy barely spoke to her unless it was to trash talk or plan someone’s demise.

“He’s fine, it’s just he’s been randomly getting sick and we were hoping you might take a look?Things like colds and stomachaches… not exactly normal for him you know?”Lucy glanced at Linda, her tone even but Alex could hear the slight worry there.

“Of course.”Her hand tugging at her hair in agitation as the new worry was placed on her shoulders.“Anything he needs.”

Lucy gave her a tight smile, “great.I’ll let Lois know.We’ll be in touch.”

And then she was gone, as quickly as she had come.Alex was starting to feel like she had whiplash.

“You ok?”Linda asked quietly, eyes searching Alex’s face.

“Yeah.”Alex nodded, turning and pulling the other woman behind her.“Just—I’ll explain everything at your place.I just—we’ll talk at your place.”

~*~

Alex pacing back and forth in her living room was a sight that Kara could get used to.Her agent’s entire body was tense with irritation, and although Kara was worried, she couldn’t deny that the aura Alex was exuding was _hot._

Alex was explaining what had happened at CatCo, the sleeves of her dress shirt rolled up and hands periodically digging in her hair. Kara was trying to listen, she really was… It was just that the muscles in Alex’s exposed forearms were extremely distracting.Like really, really distracting… and those hands…

“Linda!”Alex stopped in front of where Kara was seated on her couch, perching herself on the coffee table so that they were at eye level.“I need you to listen to me honey.This is serious stuff.”

Kara’s eyes shot up and she fought a smile.Alex was so damn adorable.

“Honey?”

Alex blushed, “so not the point right now.”

Amused, Kara leaned forward and took Alex’s hands in her own.“I get that you’re worried, I do.But Alex… this is hardly the first time someone’s threatened to harm me.”

Her girlfriend’s face morphed back to anger in a second.“Who?” was the simple question.

Kara sighed, exasperation bleeding into her tone.“So not the point right now.”

Shaking her head, Alex pulled her hands away and resumed her pacing.“Don’t do that.You can’t make blasé statements like that and expect me not to worry.I’m _always_ going to worry about you.And, like it or not, this threat was _real._ They hacked _Winn_ , that’s not exactly an easy thing to do.You asked me to trust you before, but now you’re making a joke out of something I’m telling you is serious which means _you_ don’t trust _me._ ”

Standing herself, Kara moved so that she was blocking Alex’s path and grabbed her hands again.Nervous energy flittered through her, making her stomach roil and hands shake.But she’d already decided that she trusted Alex, already told herself that if she was going to lead Alex into this resulting catastrophe between ALFA and CADMUS, she was going to do so on her own terms.Lillian may have made her what she was, but she wanted Alex to know _who_ she was.All of her.The good, the bad, and the ugly.Alien and mechanical parts alike.As Woody Harrelson said in Zombie Land: nut up or shut up.

Besides she hated the fact that Alex thought she might not trust her.Her human had enough self-esteem issues as it was, Kara refused to add her name to the list.

Time to be brave.

Slowly, silently she moved Alex’s right hand behind her left ear.The ever-present implant hidden at the edge of Kara’s hairline remained solid as Kara pressed their combined fingers to it.

“I told you before, that there were things I couldn’t tell you.That there were things I wouldn’t be able to say.”

Alex’s eyes widened at the feel of the hard lump, and she swallowed before setting her jaw.

“Are you ALFA?”

“No.”Kara said simply, glad that she was able to reassure her girlfriend of at least that.

Alex continued to look at her, her eyes searching for something.“If I ask you the wrong question, what happens?”

Kara tilted her head considering, trying to phrase her answer in a way that wouldn’t go against her programming.

“Winn was telling me the other day about failed logon attempts.Computers register the attempt and then admins can go back in and look at who tried to access what at what time… does that make sense?”AT Alex’s nod she continued.“Winn claims that he can track the perpetrator down, and then give their information to the authorities for… ‘going against the laws’ so to speak.Human punishments are very… tame.” 

The agent’s mouth pinched in a thin line.“Are they hurting you?Recording you?”

Kara leaned in slowly, giving Alex time to pull away.She didn’t, and Kara was able to rest her forehead against Alex’s temple, breathing in the slightly floral scent of Alex’s perfume.She kept her touch light, not wanting to hurt Alex with the frame of her glasses.

“Not right now.”

Alex nodded, dropping Kara’s hand and pulling her into a hug instead, left hand still dancing on her implant.“Can I help?”

A shudder ran through Kara’s body, relief flowing through her veins like wildfire.She’d hoped Alex wouldn’t be mad, but to have _this?_ This was more than she’d ever dreamed.Wordlessly, she took Alex’s hand from her ear, and pulled it down to her waist.The agent took the hint and enfolded her in a hug, breath ghosting against Kara’s neck in soothing puffs.

“Alex… I’m not—I’ve done things I’m not proud of.I know that’s a really cliché thing to say but… sometimes people don’t have a choice in what they do.But my head… Someone threatened me today and you reacted.You did everything you could to protect me.I’m doing the same thing.I know that’s not a lot of information but… I’m just asking you to trust me a little longer.Until I can figure out a way to tell you everything.Because I do want to tell you everything.I don’t ever want you to think I’m keeping something from you.”Kara pulled back, eyes earnest as she looked into Alex’s stern face.Her girlfriend looked back at her emotionlessly and Kara swallowed back her fear.“I’m not saying that whoever called you isn’t dangerous or that I don’t trust you.I do.I trust you with my life.But I can take care of myself.”She pulled her head away, sneaking a quick kiss that helped settle her nerves a little.“Please don’t worry about me Alex.I don’t want to be a burden to you.”

“Linda…”Alex murmured, hands tugging at Kara’s waist as she leaned up into a more thorough kiss.Kara kissed her back, trying to be apologetic and sincere all in one take, Alex’s lips gliding over hers.The red head pulled away, exhaling noisily and glancing away for a moment before she turned her piercing hazel gaze back to Kara.“You could never be a burden to me.I don’t… I care about you— I do, but… this is just a lot.I don’t know who you work for… or—or anything and I…

Kara nodded, blinking rapidly at the sudden stinging in her eyes.“It’s ok.I understand.”

“You don’t.”Alex kissed her again.“Fuck.I’m—I trust you too.Everything in my head is telling me not to, but… I can’t help it…I feel like… I just—When I’m around you, I feel like ‘ _finally’._ Kind of like when you get home after a long day at work and—” Alex flushed, and she stepped back as her left hand pulled through her hair.“Shit.I probably shouldn’t have said that.”

Kara’s lips twitched, her anxiety once again starting to settle.“Show’s your hand, right?”

“Right.”Alex confirmed, her own lips ticking up when Kara used her own words against her.“Look, just forget that last part ok.I’ll do everything I can to help, I promise.We’ll figure this all out and… and then we’ll go from there ok?”

“Ok.”Kara smiled, allowing her fingers to play with the hair at the back of Alex’s head as she relaxed into her girlfriend’s embrace.“For the record, I really liked that last part.”

Alex’s eyes strayed to her feet and she bit her lip.“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”Kara husked, leaning in to press a lingering kiss to Alex’s heated cheek.“I can’t believe I got this lucky… good things don’t happen to me.I—” she pursed her lips in confusion, head moving in disbelief.“You’re not pranking me right now, are you?” 

Alex sighed, banding her arms around Kara’s back from where they rested on her waist and sending a wave of pleasure coursing through the Kryptonian.

“No pranks, promise. I mean, you’re not my enemy, are you?”

Kara buried her face in Alex’s neck, content to just let herself be held.“Not yours, no.I’d never do anything to hurt you.”

“Then we’re good.”Alex tightened her arms, her fingers drawing patterns in Kara’s back.“I don’t need anything else.As long as you’re safe, I don’t need anything else.We’ll figure this out, I promise.”

~*~

The meeting with Hank was long overdue, but she hadn’t been able to get out of work between the latest threats and attacks on Cat, AA meetings, and being unwilling to leave Linda alone after seeing her face plastered all over Winn’s screens.

Alex was hanging on by a very short thread and her girlfriend must have known it, because she’d easily acquiesced when Alex had asked her to bring Maggie lunch to the precinct instead of spending her Saturday afternoon lazing about at home.Maggie may not have had Alex’s training but, she was more than capable.And the probability of ALFA or any other terrorist organization attacking a police department in broad daylight was slim.

Linda’s revelation the previous day also was not helping.Now that she’d seen her girlfriend naked while she was sober, Alex was well aware of the small smattering of thin scars across her body.Someone had hurt her, was possibly still hurting her.The lump Linda had pressed her hand to, alluding to the fact that they would be able to hurt her at any given moment and Alex would be powerless to stop it.

She needed to be able to stop it.She was already way past the ‘when she hurts, I hurt’ phase of their relationship and she needed to make sure her girl stayed safe.

The only thing was she didn’t have any idea who would do such a thing.Linda had told her she wasn’t ALFA, which was one less thing Alex had to worry about.But it also left a ton of unanswered questions.CADMUS didn’t have alien employees, only humans that they had altered with alien parts and warped technology.And if Linda had been working with the DEO, Alex would have known about it.The three biggest players in the alien community were out and that still left over twenty-five other organizations who were known to have dabbled in aliens.

That wasn’t including alien slavers.

And if Linda was a slave… or a runaway slave…God, help the motherfucker who had imprisoned her.

She nodded at Vasquez as she passed through the main lobby, the other woman giving her a small smile and wave before continuing to talk someone through the blueprints on her screen.

There was always someone in the field at the DEO.Alex had been extremely self-important in her earlier days, believing her missions were the most important.It hadn’t earned her any friends, but she still received nods of respect as she made her way to Hank.

Despite being known as a self-important jackass, she had also never had a failed mission.The youngest person in the agency’s history with such a track record, and the only woman.Arrogant she may be, but she was also effective.

“Agent Danvers.”Hank greeted her from the center command console. The man despised being in his office when his agents were in the field and tried to keep his focus on any live mission by staying on the main floor.“Saturday’s were meant to be spent with your friends.”

“You’re all the friend I need Director Henshaw.”She sassed, forcing thoughts of Linda from her head.Hank offered her a bland look, and Alex caved immediately.“I need to know if you’ve found anything out about my father.”

Hank’s face become somber, his large arms crossing his chest as he exhaled slowly.

“Not exactly.”He held up a hand to stay her questions, the large holographic monitors behind him illuminating him in a soft blue light.“It’s more about what we didn’t find.All of the records that we previously had on your father have been sealed by the Attorney General.The public records have all been distorted, encrypted, or corrupted.Jeremiah Danvers now only exists to those closest to the president.”

Alex made a noise of frustration, pressing her fists to her brow.“Dead men don’t normally erase themselves from history.”

“No, they don’t.”

“So, he’s alive.”

“You already knew he was alive.”

Alex nodded.“I’m going back to that warehouse, it didn’t look like a onetime op.Maybe someone there will—”

“Stop!” Hank glowered down at her.“That’s your plan?Go back to the heavily guarded warehouse and hope someone talks to you?”

Hank was clearly angry, but Alex had had enough of this.He’d been benching her for _months,_ for one small mistake.She was sick of it!“I can be very persuasive.”

And if her voice came out a little more than livid well… that wasn’t his own fault. 

“No, what you can be is reckless, volatile, and inadequate!”Hank hissed, muscles bulging in his arms as he tried to restrain himself.

All true.But very, very unfair.“What is your problem?!I have done _everything_ you have ever asked of me!Everything!Every operation you’ve sent me on has been successful.Every one.And now what?You’re suddenly acting like you can’t trust me?”

Hank shook his head, the vein in his temple throbbing as he pointed his index finger at her chest.“No.This is not a ‘sudden’ thing.I’ve been telling you for _years_ to get your act together, and every time I think you’re on the right path you pull some idiot move!”

“ _Idiot? —”_

“Don’t—” Hank deflated, his posture sagging as he regarded her with a cool expression.“This is pointless.You are hellbent on getting yourself killed and I can’t continue to wait around for your death notice.Do what you want.”

Alex balked, blinking rapidly as the large man walked away and stalked towards his office.Noting the hushed atmosphere, she looked around and saw a smattering of agents trying to inconspicuously stare at her.She scowled, marching out of the DEO and into the awaiting sunlight on the streets of downtown National City.

She quickly hailed a cab, having not taken her bike that morning.Her reasoning then had been that a yellow cab would be easier to get lost in than her beautiful Ninja.She was grateful for it now as she was in no condition to operate a vehicle of any kind.

Restlessness flowed through Alex and she chewed her bottom lip in contemplation, ignoring the existence of her driver completely.Usually when she was this wound up, she'd go to Maggie and the detective would talk her down.

Or piss her off about something else and at least take her mind off of it.

But Maggie was at work, and she had her cake testing later that day.She didn’t need Alex darkening her bright day with her foolishness.

She tried calling Felicity, but the phone didn’t even ring, giving a message about the line being disconnected.

Great!Her friend had probably hacked the wrong person again and swapped phones.

She cursed, her mind going a mile a minute as she considered her options.Trust.That’s what relationships were built on.Linda hadn’t run screaming yet…

Slapping her phone against her palm a few times, she finally caved and sent out a text.

|Alex: Do you think I have a death wish? _Sent 12:57 p.m._

|My Persephone:… are you asking my honest opinion? _Sent 12:57 p.m._

Clenching her left hand in a tight fist, Alex quickly typed her reply with her right.

|Alex: Yes, please. _Sent 12:57 p.m._

|My Persephone: No. _Sent 12:58 p.m._

Alex sighed, feeling some of the tension leave her body and allowing her head to hit the back of the car seat.She felt suddenly and overwhelmingly tired.One problem barely solved.What the hell was wrong with her?It felt like everything was crashing down on her and she could barely breathe.

Her phone vibrated in her hand, and she lethargically lifted her head to read her new message.

| My Persephone:I don't think you want to die.I think you're afraid of what will happen once you actually start living. _Sent 12:59 p.m._

| My Persephone: And I think you get mad at yourself because you aren't sure how or where to start. _Sent 12:59 p.m._

| My Persephone: I think not knowing how to live makes you feel even more isolated and alone, so you drink to try to stop feeling that way but then you make bad decisions or say stupid things and alienate yourself even more. _Sent 12:59 p.m._

| My Persephone:… can I call you? _Sent 1:00 p.m._

Alex dropped her phone.

Not because she didn't want to talk to Linda – she didn't – but because she could no longer hold on to the device with the way her hands were shaking.

Fuck.

Fuck.

She jerked the door to the cab open and launched herself out of the car as it screeched to a halt.The cabbie screaming at her as she grabbed her keys and wallet and started marching back to the DEO.She knew she looked like a crazy person, but she couldn’t help it.

It had barely been a drive, maybe 10 minutes tops since she’d left the DEO, but she still felt unjustly annoyed.

Agitated.

The shaking was getting worse.

She needed a drink.

She needed a fucking drink.

She pushed passed the security guards, barely managing to flash the ID in her wallet before she was going through the swinging doors.

The staff at the DEO looked startled to see her, glancing at their watches as she stormed passed them and down to the offices for the med wing.

She'd picked the lock for Dr. McKay's door before she even knew what she was doing, walking in on a startled doctor and patient.

"Get out."She said, walking further into the room and making a shooing motion with her hand."your session is over."

The patient, a male agent with a curly dark hair, gawked at her.Staring at first her and then Dr. McKay, who was also in shock.

Then Alex was taking a step towards the beefy man, who whimpered and scurried out of the room.

Alex collapsed on the couch.

"You want to be my shrink, right?"

"That was a patient!You cannot come in here and harass my patients.That young man had an appointment; you do not."

Alex waved her off, standing again and pacing in front of her desk."He had like 10 minutes left.10 minutes aren't going to kill him."

"We still need to make appointments--"

"You wanna be my shrink you see me now!"

Dr. McKay sighed, closing her eyes and pinching the skin between her eyebrows."Fine.Why did you storm in here?"

"Because I want to drink.And if I'm not here, I'm gonna go to a bar."Alex confessed, stopping in front of a picture frame and tugging her fingers.

"From what I hear, you've been sober for almost 4 months now.What changed?"

Linda.Linda was what had changed.

Fuck.

“I don’t have a death wish.I want—I want what Maggie has with Kate and Clark with Lois… I wanna wake up to her every morning and I can’t do that if I turn to a bottle every time things get bad.I don’t want to die.I don’t—fuck.What do I do?I need you to tell me what to do.”

~*~

Alex felt ridiculous as she marched down her apartment hallway arms laden full of bags.Telling Linda to come over after hanging out with Maggie at the precinct was probably fine.Asking Linda over for a home cooked dinner felt like such a stupid idea.She didn’t even cook.What had she been thinking.

_ That there was a threat against her life and having her close means having her safe.Also, that you wanted to impress her,  _ her inner voice taunted only serving to increase the severity of her scowl.

Stupid.

Scheduling after her first ever counseling session?Fucking suicide.What the hell had she been thinking.She felt like someone had scooped out her insides and repackaged her with Jell-O.Completely unstable and very likely to melt.

But she also had an intense need to see Linda.To thank her and hold her and dinner had seemed like the best way to make that all happen.

She was so fucking stupid.

And she was talking to herself which meant she was crazy as well.

Seeing Felicity at her door stuffing her face with fries only making her further question her sanity. 

"I really hope you're not planning on staying here."She said, cringing slightly at the bluntness of her words.Alex honestly hadn’t meant to sound so abrupt, or even to say those words.She hadn’t been in the same physical location as Felicity for almost 2 years now.She was overjoyed to see her friend.It was just completely shit timing. 

"I missed you too dear."Felicity sassed, holding out some fries to Alex with a small smile on her face.

Alex allowed herself to be fed, scowl still in place as she juggled the bags in her arms to reach her keys.Felicity waited patiently, offering zero assistance even as her bubble gum pink jacket eviscerated Alex’s eyes with its peppiness. 

It had been a difficult transition for her when Felicity had abruptly and permanently switched from her emo goth lifestyle to that of a bubbly blonde… weirdo.

Although Alex meant weirdo in the best sense of the word, because despite the sharp contrast between her and her best friend, Felicity remained one of the greatest loves of her life.Plus, the blonde had never once abandoned her.Never turned her back on her, even though Alex had fallen well and truly to the bottom.

She’d been the one picking Alex up off bar floors before Hank had found her in the drunk tank and helped clean her up.

Later, when they had started making progress in repairing friendship, Alex had asked her why she had stuck it out.

Alex had said some pretty shitty things when Felicity had changed her life around—accusing her of such things as being a fake, and a ‘sell-out’—a carbon copy of her father.That last one had been a low blow, unforgivable in Alex’s books.Felicity’s dad had left her when she’d been barely 8 years old.Old enough to love him but too young to understand why he didn’t love her back.Alex had never stopped apologizing for that.

Felicity had taken it all in stride, citing that growing up in casinos had made her well aware of how little inebriated people actually meant their words.

And then she had grabbed Alex’s face and forced her to make eye contact as she explained that just because she was trying something new, didn’t mean she was leaving behind the old.

“I’m not _going_ anywhere Alex.”

That had been almost 7 years ago now.

Finally grabbing her keys, she fit them into her door with, again, no help from Felicity and made her way into her apartment.Alex flicked the light on with her nose and dropped the bags on her countertop, already frantically listing the methods she would need to get this done in time.

“So, do you remember when you asked me to play bait and wreck everyone on Call of Duty?”

“Yeah sure.”Alex, grabbed the bag with the peppers, moving towards her cupboard for her cutting board.

“Well funny story, I got an ALFA invite.”

Alex nodded absentmindedly, wondering if she should really try making mousse for dessert.Her mom used to make it look so easy, but what if she messed it up?Fuck she was stupid.

“Yeah, so I got the invite.”Felicity continued, her expression contemplative as she watched Alex scurry around her kitchen.“The thing is, about 5 minutes after I got invited, an old hacktivist friend shut down the connection.Basically, dropped everything they had on ALFA on my desktop and told me to stay away from it.”

“Good idea.”Alex said breathlessly, now in full on panic mode.“Do you know how to make mousse?”

“Dude, I can’t even make an omelet.What makes you think I can make mousse?”

Fuck.She gave up.She was calling her mother.

“Are you even listening to me?Did you hear anything I said?”

“Uh huh.”Eliza picked up on the second ring, and Alex found she had never felt so relieved.“Mom!I need your help.How do you make chocolate mousse?Linda’s coming over and I don’t know how to cook but I know she likes desserts.Like really likes desserts, and I don’t know how to make anything, but you said to court her, so I thought I should make dinner, but I don’t know how and I’m gonna ruin it and then I’ll probably give her food poisoning and then she’ll die!”

There was a moment of silence from both Eliza and Felicity.

The latter whose mouth was dropped open in an ‘o’, eyebrows raised skywards.

“Mom?”She asked, after the silence had stretched on too long.“Did you forget how?”

“ _I didn’t forget… I just—you haven’t really cooked since…”_ Eliza cleared her throat and Alex could almost see her nodding.“ _Ok, let’s get started.”_  

Between Felicity’s ridiculous puns and Eliza’s steady presence, Alex felt herself calming down and following the instructions of her mother until everything was cooking and set on a timer.

“Look at you being all adult.I’m a little jealous right now.”Felicity dug her spoon into the tub of ice cream that Alex had specifically bought in case Linda wanted ice cream.

She fought back the scowl as she regarded her best friend.What was she even doing here?Why was she—

Shit.

“Did you say that you got an invite from ALFA?”

“Mm.”Felicity hummed around the spoon in her mouth, smiling at Alex from her seat at the island.“I also said that I had names, dates, and alias’ but you ignored me.Not feeling very appreciated at the moment.”

Alex eyes bugged as she rounded the counter and slapped at Felicity’s shoulder.“The hell Felicity?Why didn’t you say anything sooner?”

“Ow!”Felicity whined, hand going up to guard her body against further assault.“That’s abuse.I have a super brain and I will _end_ you.”

They glared at each other, until finally Alex caved.

“I’m sorry I’m a dick.Please, tell me your news.”

“That’s better.Now,” Felicity leaned back in the stool, spoon waving around as she began her tale.“Most of the stuff my contact had was unusable.Meaning, that he had info on the little guys.But it does give us a place to start, some solid foundational work that we can start building on.”

Alex nodded.“It also gives us people to interrogate.”

“Eh,” Felicity shook her head, making a noise in the back of her throat that promptly turned into a yawn.She was probably jet lagged.“The names I’ve gotten through so far have all been kids, disabled, or elderly persons.Not really interrogation material.ALFA is _smart._ They’re not recruiting them because _we’ll_ overlook them.They’re recruiting them because these are the groups of people that get _overlooked._ Think about it, how many children are being abused in the United States right now?Elderly?Disabled?These groups are discriminated against purely on age and mental condition, and the laws we have in place to protect them are ridiculous.ALFA though… ALFA’s promising these people the world.And then they’re delivering.From what I can see, there are 3 people over the age of 75 who were set to lose their homes because of that shitty refinance program the banks were advertising a few years ago.No one helped them.The president actually bailed out the _banks._ Those people were set to be homeless or worse.Except—”

“ALFA stepped in.”

“Tell her what she’s won Johnny.”

“Shit.”

“Yep.”

This was bad.This was really bad.World governments as a whole made shitty decisions every day.They did now, they did 50 years ago, and they did centuries ago as well.

The problem they had now was that information was so readily available to the general public that it allowed for little to no reactionary time.Which meant governments were sometimes acting on pure reflex.Not a great scenario for anyone involved.

If ALFA was feeding off of the social unrest of the people, recruiting those who felt taken advantage of and forgotten…

Everyone was a suspect.

Everyone could have joined the group by now.

Knowing what she knew about their vibranium stores…

Fuck.

This was really bad.

“Oliver and I are going to stay in town for a while.I don’t like the idea of you going after these guys alone.He’ll be your bosom buddy when you need one.”

“Not necessary.”

“Necessary.We’re gonna be at the Ritz in downtown so I’ll be close to the DEO.”

Alex’s doorbell rang, and she rose to answer it, palming her gun from where she had laid it on the counter.“Do I even want to know how you know where the top-secret agency I work for is located?”She asked to distract herself from the fact that her best friend and her girlfriend were about to meet.

“Nope.”Felicity answered popping her p, a toothy grin in place.

Alex shook her head, and looked through her peephole, startling slightly at the face of Lucy Lane.

She opened the door, a puzzled expression on her face and naked gun in hand.

“Luce—oof!”

Jon sped from where he’d been hiding around her door and wrapped her in a too tight hug.

“She needs air Jon.”

“Felicity!”

“Hey best friend.”Felicity cheered, arms opening to accept the exuberant boy as Alex turned back to the lawyer on her doorstep.

“What’s going on?”She asked, body tensed in anticipation of whatever dangerous news Lucy was about to tell her.

“Nothing.You said you’d help us figure out what’s wrong with him.”

Alex deflated, her entire body overcome with annoyance.“I’m not exactly at my lab Lucy.What do you expect me to do?”

“Take him in in the morning?He said he wanted to spend the night.What do you have a date?”Lucy asked sarcastically as she dropped Jon’s bookbag in the entrance by Alex’s coatrack.

Alex blushed, her eyes suddenly very taken with her shoes.

“Hi.”

A black hole.A black hole would be very nice right now.

Linda’s voice was beautiful to be sure, but Alex knew Lucy Lane and she knew the woman was going to hound and tease her for the rest of her days.Or try to one up her.It was an endless competition with the woman.

Swallowing her fear, Alex looked up just as Lucy began to speak.A devilish gleam in the brunette’s eyes.

“Hello, I’m—”

“Going.”Felicity interrupted, her things already in her hands as she moved to squeeze between Linda and Lucy.“We’re going.Sorry to leave so quickly, I really am looking forward to meeting you.But, well Lucy here has a serious case of GIRD so we’re just gonna go get some Pepto Bismol yeah? Yeah.Ok, well bye.”

And then she was dragging Lucy down the hall as quickly as Alex had ever seen her move.Linda fiddling with her glasses and wearing an amused expression as she watched them leave.

Felicity was the most awesome person in existence right now.

Alex reached out and took Linda’s hand, biting her lip to fight the smile that was coming at just the _sight_ of her girlfriend.

“Hi.”She breathed.

Linda smiled, tugging her hand to pull her into a small kiss.“Hello.”

“Hi.”Jon chirped, face curious as he took Kara in.“My name is Jonathan Kent.Are you Alex’s girlfriend?”

Crap.

~**~

Kara smiled down at the charming boy next to her.Jonathan Kent was adorable, his bright blue eyes reminding her somewhat of Kalasin and his slightly lopsided grin niggling at something she had long since forgotten.

That happened sometimes.

She’d see something, or smell something and her head would start pounding.Like a small person were in her mind trying to escape from the vault she’d lost her memories in.Except, the escape never came, and so Kara had learned to acknowledge the moment and move on, unwilling to torture herself as she had when it had first started.

Instead, she chose to take in the child next to her at the sink.They’d opted to do the dishes since Alex had so graciously cooked them dinner, and so she was washing while Jon racked.He was currently telling her about his favorite movies, a series called “ _The Pirates of the Caribbean_ ”, his hands mimicking sword fighting between dishes.

Kara laughed lightly as he explained why Captain Jack Sparrow was a hero and not a useless drunk before Alex’s voice interrupted them.

“Alright _hero._ ”Alex said from somewhere behind them.“Why don’t you go get ready for bed.I despise smelly children.”

Jon wrinkled his nose.“What’s ‘despise’?”

“It’s when you feel contempt… or a strong feeling of dislike.”Kara replied, reaching past Jon to rack the last of the dishes and pushing her glasses further up her nose when she felt them slipping. Unaware that two sets of eyes were now looking at her.

Alex cleared her throat, causing Kara to glance at her over her shoulder.Alex was looking at Jon, her cheeks slightly flushed but her face alight in a happy little glow.

“Use it in a sentence Thumper.”

Jon’s face turned thoughtful for a moment before he broke out in a huge grin.“I _despise_ stomachaches.”

“Then you should stop eating so much junk… and _start_ reading a dictionary.”Alex argued, grabbing his shoulders and steering him towards the bathroom.

“But Dad eats it!”

“Don’t even get me started on that.”Alex said as she ruffled his hair.

Jon scowled, hands slapping at his head to try to pat the strands down as he escaped into the shower.

Kara smiled happily at the cute little scene before she turned her attention back to the sink, wiping down the stainless steel to remove the residue from the dirty dishes.Her glasses had flecks of water on the lenses from the slight splashing that always came with doing dishes and she removed them to wash those as well.

Alex crossed back over to her and wrapped her in a hug from behind; Alex’s chest snug against her back.Kara sighed at the amazing sensations and let herself sink back into the embrace.

“I’m sorry.”Alex muttered into her shoulder.“I would have warned you if I had known Jon was coming over.It was kind of last minute.My friends are jerks… well, jerks with hearts but still jerks.”

The last of the water circled the drain as Kara turned off the faucet, grabbing the small towel next to her to dry her hands and setting her glasses on the counter.After all, she didn’t actually _need_ them.

“I don’t mind.I really like him; he’s adorable.And I like watching the two of you together; _you’re_ adorable.”

Alex groaned, but didn’t comment on the last part of her statement.“He likes you too.”She said instead, arms tightening around Kara waist.“He’s usually very territorial around people he thinks like me.”

Kara’s face split into a smile at _that._

“That is so cute!”She cooed, turning in Alex’s arms so she could cup her agent’s face.“You have to give me details.I want to know everything.”

Alex rolled her eyes and leaned up to kiss her, the slight differences in their height nearly muted as they were both in socks.“Could you still sleep over?We won’t do anything but… I just like having you close and … I had a _really_ shitty day.And Jon is used to crashing on the couch, so you wouldn’t be putting him out.”

“I’m sorry.”Kara’s lips tingled where they touched Alex, and she fought to focus on her words as they continued to trade small kisses.“Is there anything I can do?”

Alex nipped at her lip, shaking her head as she pressed a final caress to Kara’s mouth.“I just wanna hold you if that’s ok?”

“I’d like that.”Kara whispered, still slightly dazed from the effects of Alex’s kiss combined with the amazing atmosphere of the night.“I know I saw you this morning, but I still missed you.I was looking forward to tonight all day.”

Alex nuzzled her nose against her cheek before pressing her lips there.“Me too.”

Kara had just opened her mouth to ask about the weird texts from that afternoon when they were interrupted.

“Gross.”Jon said, his hair dripping slightly where he stood in the bathroom door.“You both have cooties now.”

Kara laughed and buried her face in Alex’s neck to hide some of her embarrassment.Alex kissed her temple, the smile evident on her face.

“I’ve decided I like having cooties.”She stated, before squinting over at Jon.“Stop dripping all over my floor.Get a towel.”

Jon rolled his eyes but grabbed one from the shelf before walking back towards them.“Bed time?”

“Almost.”Alex said, releasing Kara and stepping towards her bedroom.“Help Linda pull out the couch.I’ll grab the sheets and then we’ll watch cartoons until you fall asleep.”

Jon’s face lit up, blue eyes dancing with happiness as he grabbed Kara’s hand and pulled her over to the couch.

“I hope we get to watch _Tom and Jerry._ It’s my favorite!”

Kara smiled.“Well, you’ll have to tell me all about it.I’ve never seen it.”

She expected Jon to launch into a retelling of his favorite show; explaining characters and plot lines.Instead he peeked over at Alex who had disappeared into her closet and turned serious eyes towards her.

“Are you gonna hurt her?”He asked, voice as solemn as his face.

“Probably.”She admitted softly, looking back towards Alex wistfully.“Most of the time we hurt the people we care about most without meaning to.I made her angry because I was paying more attention to her pout than whatever she was trying to tell me the other day.” Kara turned her attention back to the small boy in front of her, turning her entire body towards him so that he could see he had her full attention.“But I promise I will try very hard not to and if I do, I promise you I’ll apologize.”

Jon stared at her eyes searching before he slowly nodded.“You make her really happy.She’s my best friend… thank you.”

A warm feeling settled in her gut, and she found herself fighting a blush.“You are very welcome.”

Then he smiled and tugged her back to the couch.“I’ll tell you everything I know about making her laugh.Sometimes it takes _hours_ but it’s worth it when it works.”

Kara would normally have laughed at the statement, but she heard a sharp uptick in Alex’s heart rate and turned her attention back to her girlfriend.Alex was stopped by her bed, phone white knuckled in her hand.

Champ darted out from the bathroom, Wren hobbling behind him as he yapped incessantly.Kara swallowed as Alex dove for her gun at the same time a distinctive loading sound echoed from about 6 blocks away.

Sniper.

She grabbed Jon, pulling him tight to her body as she flipped the couch to cover them.

The first shot slammed into the door, the trajectory clearly being meant to pierce Kara’s head.The next shot—shots—were much closer and came from semi-automatic weapons.They sprinkled the room in bullets and fluff from the decimated couch cushions.Kara curved her body around Jonathan’s, covering him as best she could as she felt the couch vibrate with the force of the ammunition.

Distantly, she heard Alex yelling into her phone, the sounds alluding that her girlfriend had just finished putting together her own gun.

Alex started returning fire at the same moment Kara heard the sniper release a second round.She wasn’t in mission mode; the Kryptonite was still heavy in her system and the noise from Alex’s gun turned her hearing fuzzy.

The bullet pierced through her right shoulder, her left hand pulling Jon just enough that he was not injured as it came out the other side of her body.

She clenched her teeth as the gunfire subsided.The attack clearly over, as she heard the men start collecting their things and running.It had barely lasted 7 minutes.

Her ears rang in the sudden silence, her hearing trying valiantly to isolate sounds but succeeding only in making her head spin and nausea flow through her.

“Jon?”Alex’s voice was frantic as her steps pounded over to their location.“Linda?Jon?”

Jon squirmed from her arms, an easy feat given that one of them was now useless and ran over to Alex.Meeting her halfway as she hugged him to her and dragged him back to the relative safety of the couch.

Slowly, Kara became aware of Wren whining near her side and she reached out her hand to reassure the pup that she was ok.It was covered in blood, and spasmed when she tried to lift it.That sucked.

“Are you ok?”Alex was asking, one hand holding a colt 99mm SMG, the other skimming Jon’s body as she searched for injuries.She grabbed the back of his head, forcing him to look at her.“Jon are you hurt?”

He shook his head, before burrowing back into her body.Alex sagging in relief as she held him against her, eyes darting up to Kara’s as the worst of her fear was obviously abated.

Kara offered her a small smile, rolling up to her knees and trying to choke back vomit.The kryptonite was interfering with her healing and making her feel very sick as the two combated each other.

Somewhere in the distance she heard sirens, signaling the police had been called.

She needed to leave.

Except Alex’s eyes, which had been relieved a few seconds ago, were now locked on her shoulder.Her girlfriend’s face contorted in anger, hands tightening on Jon, before she pushed him away slightly. 

“Hey Thumper, I have to check on Linda ok?Stay close to me.”

Jon nodded, eyes still wide but no longer as scared.

“I’m fine.”Kara tried to reassure her as Alex moved towards her, her hazel eyes laser focused on the wound.“Alex, I’ll be fine I promise.”

Alex grabbed her injured shoulder, pulling a small flashlight from seemingly nowhere and shining it into the wound.

Kara didn’t even flinch, and Alex glared at her seeming defiance.Kara wisely chose to keep the fact that she’d been trained not to react to herself.

“We need to pack the injury.If we don’t you’ll bleed out.”

“Alex—”

“Look away Thumper.Don’t watch ok?”

Jon closed his eyes, his hand gripping tight to Alex’s shirt.

“Alex—”

Her agent grabbed the discarded towel from earlier, shaking it out and tearing it into strips with a knife that she had also seemingly produced from nowhere.

“Alex, I need—”

“If you tell me you need to leave, I will _hit_ you.”Alex growled, even as the sounds of cars pulling up to Alex’s building reached Kara’s ears.

“Alex,” She pleaded hurriedly.“I’m not human; I can’t go to a hospital.This won’t end well, _please.”_

Alex glared at her, the men downstairs entering the building now, and Kara wondered if she’d have to leave by force.Champ squirmed between them, dropping his jaw on Alex’s arm as he peered at Kara worriedly.

But then Alex was tugging her up and pulling her towards her back wall.She placed her palm on the dark paint and the wall opened up to a secret room.

“There’s a first aid kit in the corner.”Alex said as she directed Jon into the room and handed Kara the towel shreds. “Stay in here until I come get you ok?”She glared at Kara some more before tugging her down into a bruising kiss.“I swear to god if you die, I will _kill_ you.”

“Noted.”Kara mumbled, staggering back into the room as the blood loss started to make her legs shake.

Alex looked at the blood and followed the spatters back to the couch.

“Stay here.”She reiterated, pressing the wall again to seal the room at the same moment she brandished her knife.

Kara choked out a “No”, but the wall was already closed.Next to her, Jon took her hand, eyes still wide but face determined as he tugged her back to the first aid kit.

The boy pulled her over to a metal bench and helped her sit down before opening the first aid kit.

“Don’t be scared.”He said as he pulled out gauze and tape.“Alex is really smart.She’ll get you all fixed up.”

“You’re a really brave kid.”Her heads-up display was flashing at her, warning her of her blood loss and directing her to her nearest check in facility for servicing.All she could think about though, was Alex using that knife to hurt herself.To protect Kara.

“Alex says that too.”He agreed, opening a bottle of saline and dumping it all over her shoulder.What he lacked in grace he made up for in optimism.Jon clearly knew what medicine was for what injury, how to use said medicine however… “Plus, I’m not human either so I’m not allowed to go to regular doctors too.”He glanced up at her as he stuffed gauze into her wound.Champ jumped up in her lamp, licking at her chin as Wren whined from the floor.Jon’s eyes went wide at the sight of the newcomers, but he kept his focus on caring for her injury.

Kara carefully kept her face blank even though she wanted to scream at the fire he was causing her injury.At least what he was doing was semi-right.

“Hey, why don’t we tape the rest of this and then tie the towel around it.I think that should hold me together yeah?”Jon nodded, happy to follow her lead and immediately grabbed the tape.Kara pulled at the strips of towel Alex had given her.She looked back up at the sound of sniffling.“Hey, its ok.You’re safe now, you don’t have to be afraid.”

“Do you know the Tarzan song?”

Kara didn’t.“No, I’m sorry.”

Wren wriggled between Jon’s legs and he reached down to pick her up, some of the tension leaving his body at the embrace.“My mom sings me songs when I get scared… that’s my favorite.”

Nodding, Kara took in the child before her.He reminded her very much of Alex, serious but funny.Champ huffed, a gust of air blowing on her neck and making her look down at the pup.He glared at her with electric blue eyes.

Right.

Kara might have a daughter but that didn’t mean she had experience in _this._ In being a mom.Or any kind of caretaker really.She was barely allowed to see Kalasin.Giving birth to someone hardly made her qualified to care for a child.

But maybe…

“Will you teach it to me?I promise I’ll remember it if you show me how to sing it.”

Jon smiled at her, his hands scratching behind Wren’s ear as he slowly started teaching her the lyrics to a song called ‘You’ll Be in My Heart.’

~*~

Alex checked the safety on her weapon as thundering footsteps echoed in her hallway.Now that Jon and Linda were squirreled away in her steel reinforced saferoom— courtesy of one, Miss Felicity Smoak—she had zero qualms about taking on anyone who came into her apartment.

She’d just shouldered herself into her bulletproof vest when they reached her floor, and she quickly stepped into her hallway, trying to access numbers.

The glaring white letters of the NCPD glared back at her and she lowered her weapon—slightly.

“FBI.”She called out, voice slightly rough from adrenaline and worry.She needed them gone yesterday.Her stubborn alien was hurt, and she couldn’t afford to be delayed by these has-beens.“I’m the homeowner.”

“Drop your weapon Ma’am.”

“I’m good thanks.”She sassed, unwilling to give up her gun when she had no idea who had attacked her.Given what she knew about ALFA’s recruiting, she wasn’t willing to trust anyone at the moment.

The officer who had spoken, a grizzled old white man who looked like he was just looking for a reason to hurt someone, raised his gun.Alex prepared herself for the shot, but then Maggie was slapping his muzzle down and striding in front of the team of officers.

“She said she’s good.Put your damn weapon down before I report your old ass.”Her friend said, worried eyes sweeping over Alex before looking into her apartment and blanching.“You were _in there_?”

“Unfortunately.”Alex confirmed, allowing herself to be tugged around by Maggie’s hands as the detective looked her over.“I really don’t have time for this Mag’s.You can collect your bullet casings but you’re not going to find anything else.”

Maggie held up her cut arm and frowned.“You mean you’re not going to tell me anything else.”

Alex leaned in, making sure that only Maggie could hear her next words.“I mean I’m not telling _them_ anything else.”

Her phone sat heavy in her pocket, waiting for her to open it back up to the text she had gotten seconds before her apartment had turned into a warzone.

The message had been simple.

_ Get out now.Attack imminent. _

Whoever had sent it had been trying to warn her.And again, Alex has no idea who it could be.

Maggie pursed her lips, opening her mouth to reply when the old white guy sauntered over to them “It’s impolite to whisper Sawyer.This your girlfriend?”

“Seriously Lorenzo?That’s your play?Your teams good here, why don’t you start patrols around the block and make yourself useful?”

Lorenzo scowled, his big meaty hands coming to rest on the barely-there waist his belt was trying to hang onto.“We need a statement.”

“I’ll collect it.Or do you want me to tell the captain about you almost shooting an FBI agent?Remember, she just needs one more reason to fire your ass.”

Another scowl and the deplorable man left, taking his small army of cops with him.

Maggie watched him go, before she pulled Alex back into her apartment.Her partner, a tall Indian man named David, entered with her and immediately started collecting evidence.

Alex let him.The man was competent, and she knew whatever evidence he collected, Maggie would share with her.Or she could pull her fake FBI creds to gain access to them.She was losing nothing by allowing someone else to do the work.

“I’m not going to be able to hold them off from staying downstairs but that should give us some time.”

Alex shook her head.“I need more than that.I need you all gone.”

Alex—”

“Maggie.”She interrupted.“I can’t explain it right now, but I have to go, and I can’t have anyone in my apartment.David,” she spun to face Maggie’s partner.“Is your body cam on?”

“Um, detectives don’t wear body cams.”David replied, hands fidgeting slightly before he finished sealing a bullet casing in a baggie.

“Of course not.”She turned back to Maggie, her hands gripping her friend’s shoulders tightly.“I need you to hear me.I waive my right to an investigation.I don’t want nor need you to be here right now.”

“Alex—”

“I own this home and I’m telling you if you want to search it, you’ll need to come back with a warrant.”

Maggie stared at her, obviously trying to figure out Alex’s play.She finally gave up after a few tense minutes and nodded sharply.“I want an explanation Danvers.This isn’t over.”

“Done.First thing in the morning, I swear.”Alex confirmed.Maggie nodded again, and Alex breathed a sigh of relief as she watched the duo leave her apartment.

Her next move was to call Vasquez.She explained what had happened as quickly as she could and asked Vasquez to impede any warrants that might be requested.Alex told her it was because Jon had been there, the presence of Superman’s son enough for the other agent to understand why cops should _not_ be involved.Within a few moments a DEO team would be there, and they’d clear the cops out of her way.

She’d just wrapped the call when Kal-El landed on her balcony, face tight with worry and suit actually in disarray.

And he was late… as usual.

“Where is he?”Superman asked, glancing around the apartment.“Alex, where is my son?”

Alex walked back over to her saferoom, palming the keypad and allowing the wall to move away.She’d called Clark as soon as the first shot had slammed through her apartment, knowing that she would probably be banned from watching Jon every again.

It would have been a small price to pay if it had saved Jon’s life.As it was, Superman had been helping to save a ship that had gotten swept up in a hurricane.

Hence the delay.

She locked eyes with Linda for a moment, something in her chest settling when she saw the woman was still breathing, before her eyes found Jon.Jon was on his knees in front of Linda, his small hands pressing over hers where they held a towel to her shoulder.On top of his hands, were Champ’s paws.The Nalger pup standing on Linda’s legs and pressing down on the wound with his forelegs.It would have been adorable if the circumstances hadn’t been so dire.

Linda was saying something to Jon that made him look up at Alex, face clearing of worry at the sight of her.He smiled tremulously, on his feet in an instant when he realized his father was there and he ran to him at inhuman speeds.

Well, there went that secret.

Superman caught the boy to his chest, holding him tightly as he reassured himself that his son was ok.

His voice was deadly as he asked, “who did this?”

“I don’t know.”Alex placed her hand on the wall again, Linda’s eyes closing as she was once again sealed in the room.“Got a threat this morning, but unfortunately that’s not really a new thing for me.”

Kal-El raised slightly glowing eyes to her and Alex had to force herself not to take a step back.

“Were you hurt?”His eyes zeroed in on her arm and the redness in his eyes increased to near heat vision levels.“Was that them?”

“No.”She said hurriedly, slightly surprised at the genuine concern in his voice.“No.This was—my friend was hurt, and I needed to cover for her with the cops.”

Honesty.She was actually being honest with Kal-El… weird.

And also, dangerous.

If he even thought of…

“You had a friend over?”He was asking, eyes glancing back to her saferoom.“Are you certain they weren’t here for her?”

“They might have been.”Alex allowed, jaw clenching in agitation.“But, only so far as it would have hurt me.They weren’t here to kill me.They were here to scare me.”

“Linda saved me dad.”Jon interrupted, eyes wide as he tugged at his father’s cape.“You should have seen it.She was so cool, she—”

“Jon.”Alex shook her head sharply.“Best friends club buddy.Necessary information only.”

Kal-El returned his sharp eyes to her, taking her in.Alex expected another lecture, a holier than thou statement from the God amongst men.

But Superman merely nodded and turned back to his son.“I’m sorry this happened Jon.We’ll come visit Alex another time, she appears to be a bit busy at the moment.”

Alex bit her lip at the understatement but accepted the hug Jon ran over to give her.

“Best friends club.”He whispered to her.“I won’t tell anyone, I swear.”

Alex held him tight, relief making her dizzy as she realized how badly this night could have ended.

“Thanks Thumper.”

She was surprised when, after Jon had released her, Kal wrapped her in his large bulky arms.The Kryptonian lifted her clear of the floor and released a shaky breath.

“This won’t happen again Alex.Next time you call, I’ll be there.I swear.No more delays.”

She shook her head and let her arms circle his broad shoulders.As mad as she wanted to be… he had probably saved over a hundred lives tonight.Who was Alex to ask him to let them die?“You can’t promise that.I don’t want you to promise that.”She pushed away from him but clenched her fingers in his shoulders.“Just keep doing the best you can.That’s all I’m asking for.”

He nodded, eyes suspiciously wet as he cleared his throat.“Does your _friend_ need any help?”

“No.I’ve got it.Thanks for the offer.”

Kal nodded again and then turned to take his son home.

Well… that had been different.

~*~

Linda’s lips twitched in discomfort, but other than that sparse movement she showed no signs of discomfort as Alex cleaned the wound in her shoulder.

It was a mess.The slug had shattered the blonde’s shoulder blade and pierced straight through to the other side.Given the other bullet holes in Linda’s shirt that had gained no entry to her body, Alex was assuming she had semi-invulnerable skin.Apparently high caliper artillery was her Achilles heel.

Alex made a note of it as she tried to figure out how she could treat the gruesome injury with the limited supplies she had on hand.

She’d snuck them out to her bike—after ordering Champ and Wren to get their asses back to Fiora and to _stop_ treating her like a pet— wary of taking the machine with Linda in the state she was.Her girlfriend had assured her she was fine and so Alex had driven them as quickly and carefully as she could to Linda’s apartment.Now they were on her couch, an untouched bottle of liquor that Alex had tried getting her to drink sat on the coffee table in front of them.

“Your face is all scrunched up.”Linda muttered, her eyes slightly glassy from exhaustion… or pain.“I told you, I’ll be fine by tomorrow.It won’t even scar… probably.”

Alex was not amused.“My face is scrunched up because you have a hole in your body.I can look through you.”

“You’re exaggerating.”

“How are you even awake right now?”She questioned, laying the last bandage over Linda’s bare shoulder.“You should be in shock.”

Linda smiled at her dopily, her eyes bright with what was probably the beginnings of a fever.

“You’d be surprised what the body can handle when it’s pushed passed its limits.”

Alex felt sick.“Linda…you could have _died._ If this had been further to the left…”

“Every injury carries the risk of death; even a papercut.I’ll be fine, I promise.”Linda leaned up and kissed her softly, hands wrapping around Alex’s wrists and bringing them to her face.“I won’t leave you Alex.I won’t ever leave you.”

The tears came suddenly and without warning, causing Alex to gasp for breath as she pressed her forehead to Linda’s uninjured shoulder.

“Thank you.”She forced the words out from between clenched teeth, trying to calm her emotions down enough to talk.“You saved him.I— _thank you._ ”

“You don’t have to thank me, Alex.I’d do that a thousand times over.”Linda wrapped her good arm around Alex, pulling her closer as she nosed against the side of Alex’s head.“I was so worried about you.I heard the first shot and I… _Alex_ I was terrified they were aiming for you.”

Alex made a noise of dissent, not willing to move just yet as she fought against her sudden onslaught of emotions.“They were definitely aiming at you though.”

They had been.

Alex clearly remembered the sound of the bullet that had crashed through her apartment.Had seen the slug slam into the spot Linda’s head had been just _seconds_ prior.When she’d seen the woman move, she’d initially thought she’d been hit, but than Linda had flipped the damn _couch_ over and pulled Jon down behind it.

After that, all Alex had been able to think about was getting them out of there alive.

Of making sure that Jon and Linda didn’t wind up dead because of _her_ mistakes.

“Jon was closer to me.”Linda continued as if Alex hadn’t spoken at all.“Jon was closer, and I couldn’t risk him getting hit.But I was terrified that by protecting him, I was failing you.”

_ That _ made Alex bring her head up.

“Don’t you ever think that ok?”She held Linda’s face between her palms, thumbs stroking the lines of her girl’s jaw.“You could never _fail_ me; not when you’re protecting him.Or anyone else in need.I could never be mad at you for being a hero.”

Linda smiled at her, the dopiness from before replacing the worry in her eyes.“I can’t believe I get to have you.You’re so amazing.I wish I was as amazing as you are.”

Alex swallowed, bringing her head down to kiss Linda again.Softly, slowly. She’d never understand why someone so sweet and kind had chosen her.Of every other person in the world that Linda could have bestowed her affection on, she’d chosen Alex.She’d _trusted_ Alex.

Had continued trusting her. 

That admission the other day, about probably being a captive of some sort… Alex would never have had the balls to do something like that.Hell, Linda still thought she was FBI.She didn’t deserve this—her.As wary as that confession had initially made her, all it did now was prove that if there were anyone who was lacking in this relationship, it wasn’t Linda.

“You’re beyond amazing.” She murmured into the kiss.Alex sighed as the blonde let out a soft giggle into her mouth, smiling slightly at her girl’s antics and recognizing that Linda was now officially delusional.“Come on honey, let’s get you to bed.”

“Ok.”Linda allowed.It wasn’t until Alex was tucking her in that she started to show any signs of fear, eyes blinking up at her in exhaustion as she grabbed Alex’s arm.“Are you staying?”

“Of course, I am.”Alex tugged off her shirt and pants and climbed over her, spooning her from behind.Linda squirmed around some, her hand pulling Alex’s up to her chin.Alex smiled gently, kissing her on the lump she’d been shown the other day, her heart beating double time as she added ‘Save Linda Taylor’ to her to-do list.“I’m not leaving you either.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, so a LOT happened this chapter.
> 
> 1\. What'd you guys think of Kara's painting? This was one of the first scenes I imagined when I started this so that was pretty cool to actually implement. And poor Alex being so torn apart by Jeremiah. We're going to see a lot more of this relationship and the history there but I warn you, you're not all going to like it.
> 
> 2\. Kara and Alex growing closer. Are you guys getting Alex's growth here, instead of going straight to a bottle she worked out her stress (sans liquor) and then sought out Linda. It's ok to seek help and comfort from people when your facing addiction. Some people say that your trading vices but as long as you are not being unhealthily co-dependent than you snuggle the shit out of anyone you need to. Don't ever let anyone make you feel guilty about how you choose to heal.
> 
> 3\. Then we see the threat. And Alex loses her shit and Linda reveals herself sort of? Getting closer and closer here, more of the pieces are coming together. and its only a matter of time. I wonder if anyone can see what's coming...
> 
> 4\. Alex's apartment gets attacked... with Linda and Jon inside of it. Alex loses her shit again. I love Jon. He's so adorable and just kind. He's a great kid. Say what you will about Kal-el but he helped raise a great person. Also, for those of you who are confused by Kara's injuries/scars/etc. a quick breakdown:
> 
> So the thing with Kara is she is Kryptonian, yes? When I was growing up that did not equate to the all powerful gods that DC has turned Kryptonian's into. It actually makes me really angry to read some of the comics and such nowadays because when I was a kid, if Superman got punched by someone his equal... that shit hurt. And when he got older... he got older. Like he aged. Because that's what people do... when they get old... cause science... Yeah he had healing powers but they didn't just happen in the blink of an eye. That shit took a few minutes. Sometimes a few hours. DC has stopped using sense imo and that's why for comics and movies, I'm a Marvel Gal. But DC has some badass TV shows so they win in that department... but then Marvel has Netflix sooo… IDK, it's complicated.
> 
> But anyway enter CADMUS. Since she was around 18 I believe (I don't have my timeline in front of me so guessing here) Kara has been exposed to Kryptonite. And we're not talking low dose either, this was some maniacal control/torture that Lillian was going for. On top of that, some of it was synthetic which as we know can be even more harmful. Prolonged exposure to any sort of poison either strengthens your immune system or destroys it. For Kara, we're seeing it do the latter. Hence why she has scars and was able to get shot. She still has some invulnerability when she's off Kryptonite but her healing is not going to be on par with Superman's. We're going to see other super cool feats she has though that Supes can't accomplish so it'll balance out.
> 
> Anyway, overall thoughts, questions, concerns? I love hearing from you guys, especially the long reviews. The questions and comments help me make sure I'm not leaving any gaping looping holes or that I'm being clear where necessary so keep them coming. They also just have the odd job of reinvigorating my soul, so there's that too.
> 
> Ok, I'm done. Thanks for reading and stay great!
> 
> ~Chronicles


	15. Never Sure (never know how far we could fall)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Previously on You Wouldn't Like Me:
> 
> Alex drops her mom off at the aiport and after an emotional reveal shows that Kara painted a Danvers family portrait. Given that her mother appears to love the picture and what it represents, Alex decides to hold off on telling her that Jeremiah is alive.
> 
> Instead she tells Linda (Kara) and thanks her for the painting in question.
> 
> Meanwhile, Kara is getting hell at work from Cat and Lena for the Christmas Party. Apparently both CEO's are upset that she allowed them to stew in their own worry. Kara grins and bears it.
> 
> Alex less so. While she is watching the mistreatment she gets a call with a threat to CatCo, specifically to Linda. She evacuates the building but nothing really happens. After a brief check in at the DEO, which results in her first therapy session, Alex decides to make Linda dinner.
> 
> Felicity shows up and they talk about ALFA, then Lucy shows up with Jon and suddenly date night gets a lot more crowded. Especially when Alex's apartment is shot up by armed men and Kara is injured in the crossfire.
> 
> Alex takes care of the police and Kara and that's where we pick up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi Guys,
> 
> I am very very tired. So sleepy, walking dead over here. Anywho, I hope you enjoy this one. We are just on a very fast downhill spiral. It's gonna be fun; you're gonna love it.
> 
> Maybe. Probably. Maybe not, but yeah you will. It's gonna be great. Shhhh.
> 
> This is unbeta'd so please forgive any mistakes I have made. And due to the extreme exhaustion, I also ask that you beg pardon that I haven't responded to comments yet. I read most of them and they are all that is sustaining me at the moment but I need some time to sleep soooo tomorrow?
> 
> Song is Tightrope from The Greatest Showman. Awesome movie.

** Never Sure (never know how far we could fall) **

 

Watching Alex wake up was now Kara’s new favorite thing.She’d woken up from the stinging in her shoulder a few hours ago and, rather than force herself back to sleep, she’d opted to step onto the slight ledge that served as her balcony.

The sun had risen on her face, the soft rays of Earth’s yellow star illuminating her in a healing glow of light.Her shoulder slowly knit itself back together, muscles and bone rebuilding inside her body.The process was slow, it always was… and painful.But for the first time she didn’t begrudge the process, she’d rather be healed than dead right now.Being dead meant closing the door on the first chapter of happiness she had ever deigned to stumble upon.She didn’t want that to happen.Not yet.

So, while she had been awake since just before sunrise, it had taken her girlfriend until almost noon to wake up.

In retrospect she could hardly blame Alex for sleeping in.Given everything Alex was currently dealing with: ALFA, her father coming back from the dead, Kara’s confession, and the attack last night…

Her human was going through a lot.

She deserved all the rest she could get.

Watching her wake up though… the cute forehead crinkle, the sleepy sighs and mutters, the way her hand immediately sought out Kara…

Kara gently took the questing hand in her own, leaning down on her good shoulder to gently kiss Alex the rest of the way awake.

She swallowed the sigh her girlfriend released, pulling back to watch the woman’s eyes flutter open.Kara smiled at her, bringing her hand up to push stray locks of auburn hair out of Alex’s face.

“Good morning.”She whispered, unwilling to break the solemn peace that the morning had granted them after such an awful night.“How are you feeling?”

Alex squinted at the bright sunlight that filtered into the room, throwing her arm over her eyes and rolling onto her back.

“I should be asking you that weirdo.”She peeked from under her arm at Kara, hazel eyes still bleary with sleep.“You’re not as pale though.And you’re not slurring your words anymore.”

Kara propped her head up on her hand, stretching out her previously injured arm and noting only a slight sting as she held it out for Alex’s inspection.She wiggled her fingers, making a fist and raising her arm over her head before allowing it to drop to the mattress between them.

“Good as new, see?I told you I’d be fine.”

Sullen, Alex replaced her arm over her eyes and sunk further into her pillow.“I don’t remember seeing an M.D. after your name.”She stated petulantly before breathing heavily and peeking at Kara again.“So fast healing is one of your alien things?”

Kara hummed, moving her fingers to Alex’s face to trace patterns into the beloved skin.“Yes, but I can’t tell you what else I can do.It’s a trigger.”

“Can you tell me where you’re from?”Alex asked as she rolled onto her side, dropping her arm and giving Kara more room to touch her.“That might help me narrow it down.”

“I can’t.”Kara tried not to let the old frustration leak into her voice.Her inability to complete the simplest tasks because it went against her programming infuriating her to no end.“I just know that I woke up in… a… hospital.”The word didn’t quite fit but it was one of the few she was allowed to say.“I asked about my family but they said no one had come to claim me.So they did.”

Alex’s face turned sad and she reached out to lay her hand against Kara’s waist.“No living relatives… no one else from your race?”

“Yes, actually.”She thought of the man she had seen yesterday; the one who wore her house sigil like it were a party favor.“Just not any who wanted me.The… doctors… they waited for two weeks for someone to come.They sent out an ad in the paper but… no one ever showed up.”

Kara wasn’t actually sure that last part was true, but it was what Lillian had programmed in her head, so despite her inner conflict, it was what she was forced to believe.

“I’m sorry.”Kara opened her mouth to waive away the apology, but Alex was already kissing her, her mouth gentle and soothing.“It’s their loss.You’re amazing.”

Kara meant to smile, but instead a noise of disbelief left her, and she turned her eyes away in humiliation.Willing herself not to cry, she pressed her eye into the palm of her hand, before digging her fingers into her hair.

“Hey.”Alex protested, scooting slightly closer and raising her hand to Kara’s chin.“It’s true.Anyone who wouldn’t come for you is an idiot.”

“I had a whole family Alex.I remember… bits and pieces but … I know that there were a lot of them and I know that we were happy…I _think_ we were happy.”She ducked her head, unable to look Alex in the face as she whispered her last confession.The agony that she thought had been long buried, bleeding through in her voice as her brows furrowed in hurt confusion.“How horrible must I have been—how much must they have hated me that they didn’t show up?I mean, I know that my parents are gone but… _no one?_ I had people and none of them came for me.No one.”

Alex’s wrapped around her solidly, pulling her into a tight embrace that tugged at her still tender shoulder.The warmth and security she found there made her throat tight and she felt tears spill over as a sob forced its way out of her body.

Alex held her through the worst of it, whispering sweet nothings into her ear and kissing her in intervals.When she’d finally calmed down, Alex started talking.Her voice was calm but Kara could hear the anger there.

“Screw them.If they didn’t want you, that’s on them Linda.You’re amazing and you’re better off without them.”Alex pulled her head back before tugging Kara down into a bruising kiss.Kara sighed at the pressure, her mouth opening in a pant at the sensation.Alex kissed her hard two more times, dizzying Kara with her affection.“ _I_ want you.”She said, her fingers tangling in Kara’s hair.“No matter what happens, _I_ want you.And I will _always_ come for you Linda.”

Kara sniffled before nodding, hiding her face in Alex’s shoulder.

Alex let her, content to draw patterns into the skin of Kara’s back.Kara clenched her eyes shut, trying to focus on Alex’s body warm against hers, the woman’s body heat making her feel safe.It did little to resolve the health warnings that were still flashing on her display.CADMUS was expecting her and she needed to go in ASAP or suffer the consequences.

But she couldn’t bring it in her to move.This felt too good… too important.

Kara thought, if they could just stay like this… just for a little while longer… she’d be able to survive anything.

~*~

 

Alex frowned down at her feet as she waited at a Dunkin Donuts.She’d initially been staring at the table, but then her worry about sanitation had overwhelmed her and she’d changed directions.She did not want to think about how likely it was that a mouse had darted across the surface.

Her switched focus to the floor hadn’t been much better when she’d seen the stained tile and wondered at the last time these things had been power washed.

Therefore, her shoes had garnered all of her attention.A simple pair of black and white converse that complimented her blue straight leg jeans and which Alex knew were probably cleaner than anything in the store.

This sucked.

While waking up to Linda had been amazing, her night had been horrendous.Psychotic assault aside, she’d had a hard time sleeping.She’d dreamt of Kara in vivid detail last night.It tended to happen after high stress situations.

Her childhood love’s laugh was still echoing in her brain, niggling at something that Alex couldn’t quite piece together.Probably a result of her being so distracted by Linda and her fear for the other blonde’s life.

She’d lost Kara.Had allowed her to be ripped from her life with little resistance.Speaking realistically, she knew that the odds were that Kara was probably dead by now.

Last night Linda had almost joined her.

Alex would not have survived that.

Losing one great love was bad enough.But two…

A cool waft of air floated by her nose and she brought her head up to look into the eyes of one Astra In-Ze.

The last General of Krypton.

Kara’s Aunt.

And a murderer.

Not that Alex had proof on that last title, but she had seen Astra at the scene and the woman had never disputed her claims back then.Back when Alex had trusted her; had given her Kara’s whole story since she landed on earth.

At the time Alex had been overjoyed.Thrilled to finally find someone who seemed to care about Kara as much as she had.She’d given Astra what little information she’d had and the General had asked to be taken back to the last place Alex had seen her niece.

So, Alex had taken her to Midvale; to her home.

And less than 24 hours later a teenage boy had been found dead, his camera obliterated and his neck broken.The cops had ruled it a homicide and had been searching for the killer ever since.

Alex already knew who it was.She’d overheard snippets of a conversation between Astra and her husband Non.Things like “it was taken care of” and “it will not be traced to us”.

Pretty hard to misinterpret that or deny it.

Not that Astra had tried.She’d simply walked away; had thanked Alex for her information and left her there fuming.

Pissed off that she’d been an accomplice to the murder of a child.

As far as Alex was concerned Astra sucked.

But she needed her help.

She wouldn’t risk Jon because of her ego.

“You should stop doing that.Someone’s going to notice that you just appear and disappear.It’s not exactly a human trait.”

Astra gave her a bland look, hands coming up to fold in front of her on the table.“I don’t remember caring much for what human’s thought.”

“Of course you don’t.”Alex bit out, some of her old ire returning.She glared at the impassive woman for a few moments before slowly exhaling.“I need you to tell me of any illnesses Kryptonians may be susceptible to.Possibly even on earth.”

“For my niece?”Astra asked with a frown.Her body didn’t move but she suddenly seemed much more alert.“Did something happen?”

“Unfortunately, no.”Alex scrubbed a hand on her face, like her Astra was under no illusions that Kara had survived all these years with no aid.Unlike her, Astra had nothing else to hold onto anymore.Her decision to believe Kara was alive was based off of pure desperation.“At least not on that front.Although, I have a few new connections I’m thinking of trying.This is about Jonathan Kent.”

Astra rolled her eyes, her arms crossing over her chest as she sank back into her chair.“What information could I possibly have for a half breed?”

“He’s your family.”

“I bear no allegiance to the House of El.”

“It’s your niece’s house.”Alex argued, trying to remember the patience she’d been cultivating recently.

Astra scoffed, voice self-assured and haughty as she turned to look out the window.“My niece would not have sullied herself with humans.”

“Your niece was in love with a human.”

A frown came over the other woman’s face and Alex pressed on.“She loved me and I loved her.And she loved Kal-El.Whatever mistakes he’s made—will make… Kara thought the world of him.His son is sick, and I need your help figuring out why.When we find your niece, what will you tell her if—"

“Do not think to shame me into action.I am a General of the Military Guild and as such am beyond persuasion!”

Finally losing her temper, Alex allowed her anger to bleed through into her voice.Her hands shook as she jammed them into the pockets of her hoodie, face flaming with her ire.“How selfish can you possibly be?I can’t believe I trusted you once.All those things you said about wanting to find Kara, about loving her, that was all a _lie._ All you have done since I met you is act in ways that would have made her _hate_ you.Kara would have—”

Her voice was cut off as Astra’s hand circled her throat.The Kryptonian didn’t press, didn’t exude any pressure.It was more of a light caress than anything else.

But it was enough for Alex to know she needed to stop.

“Do not presume to know things that you would never understand human.”Astra’s eyes flashed, and she bared her teeth in fierceness.“My niece was my heart for more than a decade.You knew her for what?A few days?How does this make you an expert on what she would have wanted?You are a child and you understand nothing.”

Alex swallowed, slowly leaning back and out of the loose grip Astra had caught her in.“Then why don’t you help me understand?”She frowned and lowered her voice, brows pushing together in determination.“I may not have had the time with Kara that you did, but she taught me all she could about Krypton; about her beliefs.I know without a doubt that she would not have wanted you to kill Kenny Li… and she definitely wouldn’t have wanted you to do it in her name.”

Astra dropped her hand, mouth pinching in agitation as she looked away.“It was an unfortunate necessity.”

“Do you even hear yourself?”Alex shook her head.“You blame Kal for not being there to save her, but you’re every bit as responsible.You _landed_ with her. _You_ knew where she was, and you still left her alone.In the care of _humans..._ Did you even love her at all if you can do something like that… _say_ something like that?”

Astra turned sharp eyes back to her, her irises slightly red in the center, before she slowly blinked and gave a sharp head nod. 

“Follow me.”

Which was probably a bad idea.

Alex had chosen the public setting in the hopes that Astra would be less likely to eviscerate her.Following her to a dark alley or the docks or any other sketchy setting seemed to be a sure-fire way to dash all of those hopes.

Unfortunately, beggars couldn’t be choosers and someone, presumably ALFA, had just shot up her apartment and put two of the people she cared about most in this world at risk.Destroying her equipment in the process.Alex wasn’t exactly in a surplus of options right now.

So, she followed Astra… to the NICU at NC Memorial Hospital.The General walked past security as if she were a frequent flyer, nodding at nurses and doctors until they stopped in front of the glass wall where parents could look in at their babies.

Astra was cool and collected, exuding a confident air of belonging.

Alex was confused and wary, eyeing every guard they encountered like she expected a pulled weapon at any given moment.

The agent stuffed her hands in her pockets, nervous energy coursing through her being and making her want a drink.From the corner of her eye she saw Astra regarding her and, instead of looking at the woman, turned her attention to the 9 incubated babies in front of her.

“Have you ever heard of a baby cuddler Agent Danvers?” Astra voice was clear and steady, not at all like Alex who was struggling to focus on any one thing at the moment.

Sobriety sucked balls.

“It’s a program the hospital initiated to promote skin to skin contact in infants and newborns when their parents were unavailable or indisposed.”Alex herself would never understand the parents who heard ‘under developed’ or ‘murmur’ and immediately thought ‘defective’.The parents that took one look at their _child_ and decided it was no longer worth the trouble.

Astra hummed her agreement.“It’s a program that I asked them to start about 5 years ago.”If Alex’s shocked face threw her off, she showed no signs.Simply continued to look into the room, her eyes dancing over each individual baby.“When Kara was ready to be born, the planet had already started to show signs of decay.Small fissures had already started to appear, but the council explained them away as idiosyncrasies.They refused to acknowledge the damage we were doing to the planet.Not until one of those fissures appeared near the building that housed the birthing matrix.Power was lost to some of the pods for 2 minutes and several of the newer fetuses were lost or damaged.Alura and Zor-El were besides themselves with worry.We all were.Kara was still about a month from a full gestational period and her chamber had been one of the ones to be affected.”

Alex looked up as Astra tapered off in her story.Astra had a dark look on her face, her eyes distant and clearly lost in memories of darker days.

“She was obviously ok though?”Alex asserted, trying to pull Astra from her thoughts.“Given that she made it to see Krypton explode, I’m assuming she was ok.”

“We made the decision to pull her from the chamber prematurely… We were unaware of the state of her pod and could not check it without interfering with her growth.Kara was close enough to completion to survive the move, but we couldn’t be certain she would have survived if we had left her there.So, we pulled her.”Astra sighed, her head dropping to her bent arm where she pinched her brow in between her fingers.“She was so small… tiny.We— _I_ was terrified she wouldn’t make it… that she was too small or… _weak_ to be able towithstand her new environment…”

Alex nodded, feeling more grounded as Astra told the story.Feeling closer to Kara than she had in _years_ at this retelling of her birth, information Alex had never had before.

“That’s why Jor-El and Lara decided against the birthing chambers.”The agent concluded.

Astra snorted, smiling wryly as she lifted her head back up.“Yes.That and the fact that after Kara was born the House of El developed a bit of a reputation amongst the Great Houses for challenging the council.It was our belief that if the council had acted than Kara would not have been put in danger, and Jor-El and Zor-El were adamant about not letting such a thing happen to another family.”Astra’s throat worked silently for a moment before she pressed on, only a slight note of waviness entering her voice.“To fear for your child and to be so powerless to change her fate is a feeling I would wish on no one… but you are correct.Kara _did_ survive and more than that, she _thrived._ She was everything we’d ever imagined and more.Youngest member of the Science Guild since its inception.We were all so _proud._ My Little One… _”_

One of the baby’s O2 alarms went off and a nurse rushed over to the incubator to fiddle with the mechanism.The nurse pressed a button.

Wrong.

She pressed another one, a note of anxiety creeping into her features.

So wrong.

The head nurse came over and slid her finger along the line, removing a kink and placing her hand on the obviously new nurses shoulder.

There you go.

“Why are you telling me this?”Alex asked.

“Because you think me a monster.And the last time I received any lead of note, was from you.I believe that if we work together I will be able to avenge my niece and bring her captors to justice.”

“Kill them you mean?”Alex shook her head.“I told you before, I won’t be party to unnecessary murder.Killing in the line of duty I understand, but senseless executions will never be something I’m ok with.I can’t stop you, but I won’t help you either.”

Astra rolled her lips, eyes squinting slightly before she tapped on the glass and pointed at a baby on the far left.The head nurse moved over to the crib, frowned at the monitors and moved over to a medication cabinet.

“Why do you think I was sentenced to Fort Rozz?”

“According to Kal, you and your husband murdered a guard.True eco terrorism.You should join Green Peace—”

“Hush.”Alex hushed.Astra’s face took on a conflicted look, her head tilting slightly as she resumed her faraway expression.“I did not kill that guard.Nor did I order my husband to do so.Non acted of his own volition on a sanctioned mission from my superiors.We were to gather information about the planets instability that Jor-El believed the Ecology sector of the Science Guild was withholding.It came down to politics, the leader of that sector would lose standing if it were discovered that they had allowed our planet to decay so rapidly with no interference.Jor-El was correct, we had the information we needed, we were set to regroup and take our findings to the Council.But… Non grew enraged.To find out you have been lied to, and that the demise of your home is an inevitability rather than a probability… it is a difficult thing.Still, no court on Krypton would have found me guilty.My sister would never have allowed for such a thing to stand.”

“Your _sister_ is the one who sentenced you.”

“Hush.”

Alex hushed.

~*~

**_Krypton_ **

_“Please leave us Kara”_

_Astra looked up into her sister’s eyes, her mirror image, clutching Kara closer to her briefly before releasing her hold on the child._

_“It’s ok Little One.”Astra turned her eyes down to the blonde girl, the bright blue eyes looking back at her bringing a smile to her lips.“We will be only a moment.”_

_Kara returned her smile nervously, her small hands squeezing Astra’s where they rested on her shoulders.“But you won’t leave right?I’ll see you again.”_

_“I would never leave you Little One.”_

_Kara beamed and pressed a last hug to Astra’s torso before she left the room._

_Astra sighed, turning once more to face her sister and unsurprised to find herself engulfed in her twin’s arms._

_“What were you thinking?”_

_“I was thinking that you had told me the Ede had set the council against my troupe.I had no political recourse for them, and you know that I would never abandon them.”_

_The Ede was the head of the Ecology sub-guild, and unfortunately had gained many allies even before he had taken over as head of his house.He was a vile, rotten man and Astra wanted nothing more than to drive her sword through his ears.Her wish was not to be, as currently, his reputation was intact while hers was in tatters._

_Alura stiffened, pulling away and peering at Astra with watery eyes.“Please tell me you did not do this.”_

_Astra frowned, slightly hurt that her twin had asked her the question.“Would it make a difference if I did?”_

_Alura blinked rapidly, pulling away from her sister completely and hugging herself.“Astra…”_

_“The Ede sent his men to intercept us, and we reacted.If the council finds issue with that then it finds issue with justice.”_

_Alura shook her head, biting her lip and turning away._

_“Would you have preferred me dead?”_

_“I would sooner execute myself!”Alura snapped, eyes flashing dangerously as she brought her focus back to the other woman.The change soothed something tight in Astra’s belly and she felt herself relax._

_“Then what would you have had me do?”_

_“You took a life Astra!You broke your vows!Our vows!We do not kill in times of peace!Your soul will find damnation in Rao and I will be left waiting eternally.How do you expect me to exist without the other half of myself?”_

_“You will manage.”Astra tried to make her voice encouraging, tried to retain her impassivity when all she wanted to do was hold her twin and reassure her that she remained the person she’d always been._

_She knew she had been unsuccessful when Alura let out a choked sob, her hands fisting where she clenched them at her sides._

_“Astra…”She pleaded, her voice breaking over the name.“You’re breaking my heart.”_

_And she could no longer keep up the inscrutable charade.Making quick strides she crossed the room and pulled her sister into her arms, the other woman sagging against her and clutching at the robes of her uniform._

_“I am sorry Alura.If I had known of another way…”Astra trailed off, her thoughts cut off by the sobs coming from her sister.Feeling more than a little of center, she finally whispered her confession.“I did not kill that guard.I would have never put you in that position.”_

_“Then come **home**.”Alura pleaded._

_“I cannot do that either.I will not leave my troupe to fend for themselves.I have your protection, they have no one.”_

_Alura pulled back, pressing her forehead against Astra’s._

_“The council has given orders to apprehend you all, dead or alive.They want the matter dealt with… and I believe the Ede has persuaded them that the information you collected would be best kept secret.”_

_Astra reeled back, nostrils flaring in anger.“My people risked their lives to get that information.We have been sentenced to death because of that imbecile and his House.”_

_Alura was already shaking her head.“It doesn’t matter.We have been silenced and I do not believe any of this was accidental.The House of El has many foes, and you were our greatest ally.Taking you off the board would be a crushing blow.They will not stop hunting you and I know you will never stop fighting them.The only way for them to win is to kill you.”_

_Feeling overwhelmed, Astra turned away, pacing over to the large windows on the other side of the room.The view was beautiful, Rao’s light shining and offering a soft glow over the crystal structures of Argo city.Astra inhaled and exhaled slowly, trying to calm her frustration as everything started falling in around her._

_“So, this is why you had Kara call me here?”Astra turned sharply, her hand cutting across her body as she faced her sister again.“To… what?Say your goodbyes?”_

_“Yes.”Astra let out a noise of frustration and turned away again.“And also, because I would like to ask you to give up your honor.”_

_Annoyance flared through her and she paced the length of the room in agitation.“You would have me destroy my name—our father’s name!?You would have me throw myself at the mercy of the Judicator Guild?Even your allegiance with the House of El could not protect me or mine from the council.”_

_“Maybe not to spare your life on Krypton… but to have you with me when we go to Earth.”Astra froze and after a moment of waiting for Alura to correct herself, spun to regard her sister once more.Alura offered her a small smile.“A name means nothing to me without a body to hold it.…and Lara is pregnant.The 1 st natural birth on Krypton in nearly 3 centuries.If the council found out, they would have her executed and anyone who did not betray her confidence with her.”_

_Astra clenched her teeth and fists.“I told you to stay away from the House of El, they never respect propriety.Rules are like recommendations to them.”_

_Alura’s smile widened and she scoffed, a breathless laugh escaping her as she regarded her sister.“Rules were like recommendations to **us** , or have you forgotten the antics **you** used to get us into?My love for Zor-El came because of his ability to see past what is and imagine what our world could **become.** And it hasn’t faded after all of these years.”She sighed and moved to take Astra’s clenched hands.“Rao has blessed me with so many people to love and I refuse to believe he wants me to sit by and watch them die.”_

_Astra frowned even as Alura’s right hand rose to smooth over the creases that had appeared on her face.“Intergalactic travel has been outlawed, Earth is unreachable.In order for you to get a ship…Alura what you are planning is suicide.”_

_Her twin shook her head.“What I am planning is for my child to have a chance—for Lara’s child to have a chance.I want our family to be together always, and if that isn’t possible, then for my children to survive.You love Kara with everything you are.I know you want the same.If I told you that what I was asking would save her, would you do it?”_

_“Without hesitation.”_

_Alura pulled her head down, her lips pressing softly against Astra’s head as tears finally fell from her eyes._

_“I love you.”_

_“I love you too.”Astra murmured, fear finally starting to take root in her chest._

_“I need you to turn yourself in to me.The guard of the House of El is waiting outside to bring you in.As the sole judicator of the House I will be expected to preside over your case… and I will sentence you to the Phantom Zone.”_

_Astra felt her heart stutter in her chest and she must have tried to pull away because Alura’s hands on her face tightened.Her sister’s eyes earnest and open as she pressed on._

_“My husband and brother-in-law have created a failsafe.At its core, Fort Rozz is a military ship stuck in time.If you can pilot the ship out of the Phantom Zone then you will be able to make it to Earth.The Guard on the military base will be waiting for your arrival in the zone, I will cordon off a time so that only you and your team will enter.General Li-Ren will be waiting and once he has pulled you on board, you will regain your corporeal form.After you board the ship, you need only get to the command center and insert the crystal that I will give you.The coordinates are pre-programmed and Kitai will meet you to be your pilot.The General disagrees with the Council and wishes his people as much safety as you wish yours.”_

_“There are a lot of things that can go wrong with this plan.”Astra whispered breathlessly, feeling like the floor had given out under her._

_“I know.”Alura returned, her own fear clear on her face.“But this is the only way I know to keep you safe.When Krypton implodes, you will be safe from its destruction.Even if we are never reunited, I will know you are alive and I will be able to return to Rao with peace in my heart.”Her twin’s hands shook along with her voice, Alura’s smile tremulous.“And if I am unable to join in the escape, then I will know that you will do **everything** in your power to make sure that Kara is safe; that my little girl knows she was loved, and that you will continue to love her for the rest of your life.Of all people, I would entrust Kara into your care with the most ease.”_

_Astra remained silent, her mind working over the plan and trying to reconstruct it for a better turn out.She inhaled sharply when Alura pressed her forehead to her temple, her voice small as she asked, “My heart is yours whatever you decide, but Astra… I don’t know any other way.Will you please help me?”_

_And honestly, she had known her answer before Alura had even finished the question.She brought her arms up and pulled her sister tightly to her chest, burying her face in auburn hair and trying to imprint the memory of her other half into her mind for her journey to the Phantom Zone._

_“Without hesitation.”_

~*~

“My people had strict laws against killing Brave One, I would not have harmed that boy.Not when my sister awaits me in Rao’s light.”

“But I heard—”

“What you _heard,”_ Astra interrupted, teeth bared and arms crossed.“Was me telling my husband that we must part ways.I condoned his actions once and it cost me everything. I would not do so again.”

Alex frowned, taking in the woman before her and replaying her story in her head.She’d always known Astra was formidable, but to have allowed herself to be sent to the Phantom Zone on the slim hope that she would one day be reunited with her family… that was beyond anything she’d ever imagined.Especially considering Astra had arrived and found most of her family had been killed, and that only Kal-El had found safety.

The woman was probably only still standing because she was ruthlessly searching for Kara.

“I—why wouldn’t you just tell me that?Why would you let me believe the worst of you for all these years?”

“A General explain herself to a human _child?_ I hardly see the propriety in such an action.”Astra sighed and finally pulled her eyes away from the babies in the unit.“Besides, you had already made up your mind about me and I was in no position to fight at that moment…”The General shifted, looking slightly uncomfortable as she continued.“A few members of my unit were… injured, and rather than heal in your yellow sun, they became extremely ill.I had to care for them.”

Alex latched on to that tidbit of information.A sick Kryptonian was exactly the information she needed.

“What happened to them?What’d you do?”

Astra’s mouth pinched in thought, her breath coming noisily from her nose.“It took us years to figure out how to leave the phantom zone.Our pilot was injured and unable to charter the ship through the minefields.The soldiers who had made it off of Krypton were dying, their regeneration pods failing without the supplies we normally received from Krypton.Finally, we decided to allow a felon on board to do the job for us.Indigo tied our ship to Kara’s and her autopilot brought us to Earth.And some of Fort Rozz’s prisoners with them.Most of them died during re-entry, but some as you know are still on the loose.”Astra sighed and shook her head.“I thought it my duty to track them all back down.My sister had dedicated her life to making sure they could not harm other’s.Even if I was disgraced, I would not allow the same fate to befall her name.”

“That doesn’t explain your sick.What was wrong with them?”Alex asked impatiently, her arms crossing against her chest and nails digging into her biceps.

“My injured soldiers… their health was already compromised.Adding another planet, the antigens and parasites that ran rampant here.It was not a good combination.I lost two men before we managed to stave off the worst of the infections.”Astra turned to look at her, her hands clasping behind her back in a true military pose.“Your people think mine to be invulnerable—God’s amongst men.You would know how similar our species truly are if you had been there during those days.I did not come collect Kara for fear that she would contract whatever illness my people were suffering from.I needed to find help, and I did.”

Alex took the information in, a part of her that had always resented Astra loosening as she realized the General had never abandoned Kara.She’d simply done everything she knew to _protect_ her.

“What help did you find?Is it a medicine, a doctor that would be able to give me some insight into Jon?”

“You said this boy was the son of Kal-El?”Astra asked, eyes once again peering into the distance.“That would make him my niece’s cousin.She was always asking for a little brother you know?She asked for one, like your children ask for puppies.”

“Astra… He’s only going to get worse if you don’t help us now and I’d prefer to keep him as far away from Kryptonite for as long as I can.You said you wouldn’t wish the fear of losing a child on anyone, but you are only perpetuating that cycle now.”

Astra offered her a bemused smile.“I will make you a deal Brave One.You will resume helping me search for my niece, and I will tell you all I know about Kryptonian epidemiology.Mind, I am a warrior not a healer.”

Alex nodded, feeling more grounded than she had in a while as she stuck out her hand.

“Deal.”

Astra shook her hand, nodding solemnly as she turned back to the babies in the ward.

“To help this child you will need a world traveler.I was aided by someone who has probably long since passed, but any species with longevity should be able to offer you insight.It helps if they are from a planet of war or famine.Those specie’s have the best healers as they are the ones who were exposed to the worst illnesses.You should consider the Chatari, Dutoxians, Helkbacks, Krishar, Ewoks… maybe the Belanian race… These are the most skilled healers out there.I have a few contacts that I can reach out to, but it will take some time.”

Alex scratched at her brows, face annoyed as she considered her options.“Jon seemed fine when I saw him… I wasn’t able to do much but take his temperature, pulse ox, and blood pressure.His lymph nodes were swollen but he didn’t have a cough and all of his readings were in normal ranges.”She gnawed at her lower lip, mind going over the limited information she had managed to gather.“His Sp02 levels were a little low though… but still normal.I don’t think he’s in any immediate danger, whatever you can do… I’d really appreciate it.”

Astra tilted her chin, a sign of deference in the Kryptonian military guild.“When shall we start working towards finding my niece?”

“I never stopped.”Alex confessed, arms dropping to her sides as the tension left her body.“And I think I just got a lead actually.My father, Jeremiah Danvers is alive.And he’s working for CADMUS.”

~*~

Alex had called up Felicity, Maggie and Winn when she had finished talking with Astra.Having the General keeping an eye for Jeremiah would be crucial in finding the man.The woman’s superior senses were more effective than a bloodhound.

It was one less thing that Alex had to shoulder alone.Meeting her friends for lunch to discuss her future plans, would alleviate even more of the burden.

And it was giving her major anxiety issues.

“You look serious… did somebody die?”Felicity’s eyes were wide behind her glasses as she sat across from Alex in the booth at Big Belly Burger.Alex had chosen the spot specifically because she knew how much Felicity craved the greasy food, and how little she was able to have it because of her health nut husband.

Not that Alex could talk.She well knew Felicity’s habit of eating pure junk and had had to steer her friend away from greasy take out options more than once.

Just like Felicity had had to pull Alex out of her research on Kara and force her to talk to humans.

They balanced each other out.

“Nobody died.”Alex replied, sliding a menu in front of Felicity.“My apartment was attacked last night but… nobody was hurt.”

Felicity frowned, her eyes concerned as she laid her hand on top of Alex’s.“Linda and Jon were there though.That must have been hard.”

“Linda you say?”Maggie’s irritated voice came from over Alex’s shoulder, the detective scooching into the booth and none to gently forcing Alex further in.“I didn’t see her there.Must have been blending into the walls.”

Alex scrubbed a hand over her face, trying to curb her annoyance.“Maggie, I couldn’t talk in front of your partner and you know it.Stop being a dick.”

Her friend bristled, grabbing the menu from Felicity and glaring at it.Winn slowly edged into the booth on Felicity’s side, handing her a tablet as he sat down.

“I’m a dick she says.Her whole fucking apartment gets obliterated but _I’m_ the dick.”

Alex rolled her eyes but understood that there would be no talking to Maggie until she laid all her cards on the table.The Latina tended to get too far into her feelings when she was scared.

“Friday morning, I received a call at CatCo telling me I was too close to an investigation and to back off.The caller never specified what group they were with or what investigation they were a part of, but they knew about my relationship with Linda.They sent a live feed through Winn’s computer of her face.”

Felicity’s eyebrows shot into her hairline and she glanced aside at Winn.“Pixilation?”

“None.”Winn stated, eyeing the menu in Maggie’s hand but obviously unwilling to disturb her in her anger.“And Cat’s cameras are good, but not that good.This was HD, and the angle was all wrong, so I _was_ thinking drone, but I didn’t really see anything—”

“You didn’t have to see it.”Felicity was now peering down at the tablet Winn had given her, scrolling through whatever was on the screen.“You know as well as I do that if they have a camera from the last decade they’d be able to reach incredible amounts of zoom.Especially if its above 4k.It would eliminate pixilation you would normally see on security cameras and –”

“Explain away the angle.”Winn confirmed. “That’s what I thought.Plus, there was some slight movement just here.”He pointed at the screen in her hands and it became clear she was watching the video from yesterday.“Given that, I ran through the cameras around the building trying to isolate that specific angle and lo and behold, we found a drone about a half mile out.”

“So, whoever’s doing this doesn’t want to get their hands dirty.”

“Maybe not, but…”He tapped at the screen and Felicity’s frown deepened.“they do have human allies.”

“CADMUS.”Alex interrupted, seeing the geek-talk starting to make Maggie’s face red.Their waitress came over and took their orders, a polite smile on her face as she departed.

The blonde genius didn’t even look up from her work.“What does CADMUS have to do with ALFA?I thought we were dealing with alien terrorists.”

At Felicity’s question, Maggie finally softened, her eyes flickering to Alex’s face in concern.

She needn’t have worried, Alex had gotten very good at compartmentalizing.

“We were on a stakeout about two weeks back and discovered that CADMUS was working with ALFA.It looked like their point of contact was Jeremiah Danvers.”She smiled politely as the waitress came back with their milkshakes, vanilla for her.Uncharacteristically, Felicity took no notice when her drink was placed down in front of her.Her eyes were focused solely on Alex, searching her face for any signs of distress.“It’s fine Felicity; I’m good.”

Felicity shook her head, her body starting to literally vibrate.Alex braced for impact.

“Fercockt!”The blonde slammed her fist down on the table, eyes aflame with anger.“What’s your plan?”

Alex shrugged, feeling oddly warmed by her friend’s reaction.Strangely, Felicity’s anger on her behalf quelled the anxiety she had been feeling about not being in control of everything.“My plan is to keep my girlfriend alive and find out what’s wrong with Jon.Astra is working on tracking down Jeremiah.You and Winn are digging through that data dump you got from your hacker friend… there’s not all that much for me to do but go to AA and therapy.”There were weird looks all around and Alex found herself fighting against squirming in her seat.She frowned as she tried to answer what was making them all act so peculiar, her words coming slowly. “Obviously Maggie and I will still beat the streets, run stake outs but there’s no point in chasing after ghosts. And I do want you to look at my phone—I got a weird text right before the attack but other than that… I don’t need to draw anymore attention to myself than I already have.My original op was as a security detail to Cat.The ALFA investigation always came second.I can’t protect her if I run off in righteous anger.”

There was a tense filled silence, in which Alex really wanted to just get up and leave, but than Maggie was hugging her.

Hard.

And Winn started badly beatboxing as Felicity rapped ‘Started from the Bottom’ by Drake.

Alex rolled her eyes.

Fucking weirdos.

They were all fucking weirdos.

“Are you quite done?”

Felicity laughed, reaching over to high five Winn.“Now we are.We’re just so proud of the adult we’ve raised aren’t we guys?”Alex rolled her eyes at their antics but straightened when Felicity took on a serious tone.“But in regards to the data dump.Remember when I told you I had dates?Well, we think we’ve narrowed down some of their attack windows.One of the more promising leads is in roughly a month and a half, possibly two months.Then we’re pretty sure there’s one happening this month.And another that’s dated in a few weeks.A little scattered but we don’t see anything after that 2 month mark so we believe that that would be the grand finale.”

Alex nodded, running a hand through her hair as she looked aside at Maggie.

“Two months?”

“We’ve been in tighter spots.”The detective said with a grin.

Alex fist bumped her, her own grin stretching across her face.“Always the optimist.”

~*~

Kara was getting sick of people trying to kill her girlfriend.

Maybe she’d understand it a bit more if Alex was evil or had started a fight with someone, but no.She hadn’t.

She’d been at a party the first time—

Well ok, no.The first time she’d been trying to get to Cat Grant.

She banked to the left swiftly as a gaggle of geese flew in her path smattering her in their loose feathers.

She scowled, allowing the wind to clean her of the fluff.

And then, yeah ok _Kara_ had been the one to almost incinerate her on that rooftop.But she hadn’t!

And now they were happy and involved and someone had decided it was ok to rain bullets into Alex’s apartment

So, who was the real criminal here?

With her eyes closed in concentration, she inhaled slowly, letting the afternoon air filter in through her nose.The display in her eye was still blinking angrily at her and she knew that the team at CADMUS had already been alerted to her previous health status.She was working on a timeline now.CADMUS wouldn’t wait much longer before they came to collect her.Her only focus now?

Finding out who the real evil people were here.

Not her.

A hawk screeched somewhere behind her, and she chose to believe it was concurring with her thought.

Because the answer was: not her.

Her nostrils flared.There.

There were five counties between her and her latest group of prey.

Humans.

Kara had assumed her quarry would be aliens… or at least metas.

She slowed down as she came upon a church, the priest reading a passage to his congregation.Normally she was respectful of other people’s faith.Today… today she had a deadline.

Hovering directly over the roof, she took a second to make sure she’d scented out the right people, centering herself before cutting off her flight.She freefell 2 stories, allowing her weight to drop her like an arrow through the roof of the church.

Wood and tile splintered and cracked around her, the crowd screaming as she landed lightly on her feet, clothed from head to toe in black.

She moved at speeds invisible to the human eye as she gathered the people she was looking for at the front of the church.

Once, her quarry was caught she turned to the rest of the parishioners, allowing her eyes to glow with heat vision.

“Leave. Now.”

They scattered, stumbling over each other as Kara turned her glare to the 4 men and 3 women who had fired into Alex’s apartment.

They glared at her, moving into fighting positions, hands going to guns.

Kara let them.

Their bullets bounced harmlessly off her shoulders and she reached out her hand to catch the ones they aimed at her head.

The bullets stopped almost abruptly, and a quick check with her x-ray vision proved that the magazines in their handguns were now empty.

“You will tell me who sent you on that assassination attempt, or I will kill you.”Her words were clear, despite her mouth being covered by her fukumen, only the slits of her eyes visible to them.

One of them, a woman with short hair pulled back into a tiny ponytail, stepped forward.She bared her teeth at Kara, an act of defiance as she spat at her feet.“The hell is it to you scum?”

Kara flicked one of the bullets she had caught at the nuisance, the ballistic going straight through her eye.She dropped immediately.

Her colleagues blanched but kept their mouths shut.

It had unfortunately been necessary.These were trained professionals, they needed to know that she was serious.Kara might have been able to draw this out if she hadn’t needed to work quickly.She might have been able to spare all of their lives.

As it was, she did not have that luxury.

“There was a child in that apartment and I have a code.I would like to know who has decided that children are expendable.Whoever they are, I can assure you, they do not care about your life nearly as much as you seem to care about theirs.”She thumbed her next bullet, eyes focusing in on the large man with the red beard.“So. Who. Were. They?”

~*~

Alex sighed as she left her apartment, a bag stuffed with some valuables and clothes over her shoulder.Most of her stuff had been trashed in the foray but she’d at least be able to clothe herself.She stared down at her phone, seeing no new messages had appeared since the last time she had checked it a few minutes ago.

She had hoped she’d be able to stay with her girlfriend until she could get her apartment sorted but she hadn’t heard from Linda since she had left that morning to meet with Astra.

Linda’s skin had completely healed over, the smooth skin unblemished where it had been torn apart the night before.Alex had been so relieved at that development that she had completely forgotten that she was now temporarily homeless.

The bullets had literally destroyed her apartment, and on top of that it was an official crime scene.She wouldn’t even be able to begin repairs until the NCPD had cleared the area.

And now Linda wasn’t answering her phone.Alex supposed that could be because the other woman was sleeping.After all, even Harry Potter had gotten exhausted after he had had to regrow his bones.And that was fiction.

Linda had every right to be tired.

But Alex still worried.And she was homeless, so not cool.

She sighed, quickly deciding against calling any of her friends.They all had their own lives and she had been asking a lot of them recently.She had a perfectly good couch in her office at the DEO.They’d all probably be pissed if they found out she’d decided to stick it alone, but it honestly wasn’t about her closing herself off or whatever.

She’d been feeling… overstimulated.

The constant stresses of her job, Maggie’s wedding, her fight with Winn, her budding romance with Linda… She needed some ‘me’ time.

A moment of quiet to just clear her head; to just breathe.

Her hand shot out, slamming into the forearm that appeared in front of her face and she moved her body smoothly with the momentum.Following her attacker’s movement so that she spun deftly into the opening they had left with the wide swing, ducking under and behind them, and shoving them against the brick wall.

The large man let her do all of it, his glasses dangling haphazardly on his face and his clothes disheveled.

“Clark?”She asked breathlessly, her blood pumping loudly in her ears as she took in her ‘assailant’.“What the hell?”

She released him, stepping back and allowing him to turn to her.

The man’s face was blotchy, and he looked at her with pure agony on his face.“Alex.”The name was almost sobbed out and she immediately stepped closer to him, her hands clutching his biceps as she forced herself closer.

“What happened? Clark, where are Jon and Lois?”Her heart thundered in her chest as she glanced around the block, looking for any sign of the two missing Kent’s.“Clark, where are they?Are they hurt?”

Had Jon been injured last night?

No.No, she had checked him over herself.Which meant that something had happened after?Had someone gone after them?

He shook his head pitifully, sobs choking his speech as he pulled her into an alley she had just walked passed.Lois was standing near the wall, her arms rocking a small bundle in her arms.

The woman’s head snapped up when she heard them approaching, a wild look in her eyes as she took them in.

The red sneakers alerted Alex to the fact that the bundle in Lois’ arms was in fact Jon.They were his favorite pair, he said they made him feel like his favorite superhero The Flash.Barry teased Clark about it relentlessly.

She moved swiftly, her hands pushing back the sheet they had wrapped him in and taking in his face.Dark bruises had formed below his eyes and his cheeks puffed out like a chipmunk.Across his body purple splotches stretched, probably from where his parents had held him during transport.His arms and legs were also swollen, and when Alex pressed, a lasting indent remained.

Nephrotic syndrome.

Kidney failure.

His lungs had a barely-there rasp as he tried to draw air into them and, pressing her ear to his chest, she was able to _hear_ the fluid buildup.

This was too fast.This was happening too fast.

“When did this start?”She asked, her fingers seeking out Jon’s pulse.It was fast, the intervals nearly overlapping.He wouldn’t survive with his heart moving that quickly.

“About 4 hours ago?”Lois held Jon out to Alex, her voice distraught as she tried to understand what was happening.“Clark tried taking him to the fortress but Kelex said they didn’t recognize whatever was hurting him.They said there was nothing they could do, because he’s half human and the pods were designed for Kryptonians.So we came here.To you.Alex, _please.”_

Fuck.

Fuck.

She closed her eyes, trying to think of something – _anything—_ that would work.That would reverse the effects of what was taking place in front of her.

Medicines ran through her head rampantly, alternative treatments that she had read up on.

She didn’t know what to do.

“Alex?”Clark called, finally finding his voice as he circled to stand in front of her.

_Fuck_.

_Fuck_.

“Alex?”Lois rocked Jon, holding her son closer to her as Alex dropped her hands.

The loudness in her ears was almost deafening at this point and she felt herself become lightheaded.Too much, this was too much.She hadn’t felt this out of control since… Kara’s face swam in front of her.Beautiful and young, forever stuck in time, her Kryptonian smiled at her.

_“You can do this Alex, just breathe.”_

Easy for her to say.Alex remembered that conversation.They’d snuck down to her parents’ lab and Kara had been trying to show her the basic principles of ‘programming’ DNA cell structures.Alex had grown very frustrated and Kara had stepped up behind her, hands resting over hers where they held her tools.Kara had leaned in close, her head parallel with the microscope that Alex was glaring into and whispered the words to her.

_“You’re trying to finish something you haven’t even started.One step at a time.Start at the beginning, don’t think about the end.It’s not important yet.”_

Basics.

She needed to go back to basics.

ABC.No.That was CPR.He didn’t need CPR, he needed—

Airway.She needed to preserve his airway.

Fluid buildup in the lungs.

He was still breathing on his own.She had time.

“Follow me.”She ran full tilt back to her apartment; hearing Clark take Jon from Lois’ arms.She hit the stairs and kept going, crashing through her door as she headed to her bedroom.Alex’s hands were surprisingly steady as she pushed her bed to the side revealing a safe in her floor.

No one ever thought to check a floor for a safe, just a wall.She and Felicity had thought they were being so clever when they had thought of it.Now, she just wished she had thought to put it somewhere closer.The extra steps and maneuvering having her more concerned than ever that she was wasting time.

Unlocking the safe, she quickly dug inside for emergency medical supplies.

Clark entered behind her, hovering over her shoulder, so she was easily able to turn and slide a syringe into Jon’s skin.The Kryptonian blanched, his face still set in mild panic as Alex withdrew the needle and started pushing him from her apartment.

“It’s a diuretic. He might start peeing on you.”

Lois met her in the hall, matching her stride as she made her way back outside.“Why would you give him that?What does it do?”

“It makes him pee.His body is filling up with fluids.That will force some of it out.It’ll buy us some time.”Alex punched angrily at her phone, tapping on Linda’s contact information to start a call.

Krishar.

Now that her mind was working again, she remembered that Astra had mentioned finding a Krishar.

“Time for what?Where are we going now?”

Alex glared down at her device.Voicemail.Again.“I need to find my girlfriend.” 

~*~

 

Kara was exhausted, her body felt like she had run it through the gamut.She knew logically that that was mostly because she had used her powers while on Kryptonite; while still healing; and _also,_ while mentally blocking her programming from interfering.

It didn’t make her feel any better about it.

She hovered near the entrance to CADMUS, about 15 miles above and 10 miles away from the doorway.It would be enough that she could hide out just a moment longer.Focusing one more time, her ears sought out Alex’s heartbeat, a smile coming to her face when she found it.

She’d wanted to hear it one more time in case Lillian decided her worth had expired.

Her smile quickly dropped when she heard how frantic Alex’s heart was and she turned her full attention onto her agent, eyes zeroing in on her location.

At her apartment…

Alex was at Kara’s apartment, pounding near frantically at the door.Behind her were a man and woman, with a little boy held tightly in the man’s arms.

Something was wrong…

The man shifted.

Jon.

Her display blared at her, the red letters almost drowning the rest of her vision.She should go to CADMUS, she’d already delayed for too long.

At her apartment, Alex was yelling her name, desperation coating her words and making her voice wobble.

Alex.

There was something wrong with Jon.

Alex.

She was in her living room before she’d realized she moved and had flung her door open before she’d realized she had changed into sweats and a hoodie.

“Alex.”

She’d barely got the name past her lips before the woman had thrown herself at her, clutching her tightly for a beat before releasing her.

“Linda, please.I need your help.”

“Anything.”She glanced at the people behind Alex—at _Jon—_ her eyes hesitating as they took in the large man.He looked familiar.

Alex released a shaky breath, already tugging her out of the apartment.“Jon, he’s—please we need to go to the camp.”

No.

Anything but that.

“Alex…”

“They’re safe I promise.”Alex shook her head, glancing back at the pair before refocusing on Linda.“They’re safe, I’ll vouch for them.They won’t hurt anyone I swear.But we need to see Ni.She’s a Krishar right?She was the leader so maybe she’s a healer?”

“She is.”Kara confirmed, worried eyes flickering between Alex and Jon.“But Alex I can’t take you there.Not with… You’re asking me to endanger countless lives.”

Lives that Kara had worked _years_ to save.If something went wrong… if this was some sort of set up?Not only would she have aided in killing off hundreds of aliens—some of whom were the last of their kind—but it would also leave her with nothing but blood on her hands.

That was the only thing of hers that she’d ever been proud of besides Kalasin.The only thing that got her through her sessions most times.

Alex was asking her to potentially destroy that.

“You said you trusted me.”The agent said, her eyes wet with tears and her fingers clenching on Kara’s biceps.“You said you trusted me, and now I need you to prove it.”

“It’s not—”

“He’ll die!”Alex sobbed, dropping her hands from Kara’s arms so she could shove them in her own hair.Her breath came in heavy pants as terror started to set in and Kara felt shame swim inside of her.She had done this.This was her fault.“If you don’t help us he’ll die.Look at him.” Kara did, seeing bloody bruises litter the boy’s skin and labored breaths come from his lungs.“His organs are _failing._ You’ll be sentencing him to death.”

Fists clenching at her sides, Kara shook her head in frustration.

Anything but this Alex.

“Just take _him_.”The watery plea came from the man, the woman obviously too broken to even form words.“If it’s us you don’t trust than please just take him.Save my son. _Please.”_

She stared at him, his blue eyes making her head hurt as something niggled in her brain.Alex’s hitched breath brought her attention back to her girlfriend, to the devastation that was happening to the woman she claimed to love.

She was supposed to be at CADMUS.

Lillian would not be happy.She would pay for this.

“Ok.”Alex sobbed in relief, her hand reaching out to take Kara’s.“Ok, let’s go.”She raised her eyes back to Jon’s parents, something inside her telling her she could do this.“All of us.”

~*~

Ni was methodical in her handling of Jon.The moment they had gotten past Bob, the Krishar had been waiting for them, as if she’d known there was trouble.

Apparently Champ and Wren had _not_ listened to her when she’d told them to scram and had run ahead to warn Ni of her incoming patient.

They’d been escorted to an old mobile home, Clark having to stoop and squeeze to fit in the tight entryway.Alex would have laughed in any other instance, as it was she could barely function past her immediate need to see Jon safe.Her hand gripped Linda’s so hard it was painful for _her_ but she found herself unable to let go.

Surprisingly—although at this point Alex should really stop being surprised at the things that happened around Linda—the small mobile home was simply a doorway into what appeared to be a fully functional hospital/clinic.The room was open, covered over in a steel ceiling complete with skylights.There were about 4 hospital beds that Alex could see; an older model that had clearly seen better days but which had been painted odd colors and had had the tears stitched together with yarn.That, put together with the walls painted with what appeared to be tribal stories and children’s’ art work made for an eccentric environment.

Alex barely saw any of it, eyes focused on Jon’s body as he was carefully laid on the small bed and Ni laid her hands over him.Next to her a globous mucus covered being covered Jon’s hand.

Alex, Lois, and Clark all made noises of protest—Alex and Lois moving to intercept the alien—but Linda tugged her back.Her eyes kind if not exhausted.

“It’s ok.She’s a friend.Her name is,” Linda made a series of clucking noises that Alex didn’t even pretend to try to understand.Her girlfriend smiled patiently, hand squeezing Alex’s in their death grip.“She is fond of bones; some people here call her that.”

“Bones.”The name came from Lois, slightly skeptical but still appreciative.“Can you please tell us what you are doing?”

There was a series of slurps and popped mucosal bubbles.Alex couldn’t even focus on the grossness of that.She was such a fucking mess.

“She says that there are toxins in your son’s body.She is trying to remove them.I will create a tonic that will alleviate the workload on his other organs.”Ni said, moving back towards a lab table.Alex went to follow her but Linda pulled her back once again, shaking her head.

“It is disrespectful to follow a Krishar into their workspace without permission.It is a sign of distrust.You need to be patient.”Alex’s throat worked and she turned her face away.Linda didn’t press her, instead turning back to Lois and Clark and continuing where Ni left off.“Bones is a Pockman.Her species feeds off of parasites, toxins… pretty much any human ailment that isn’t a bacterium or made in a lab.For obvious reasons, her kind needs to stay in hiding or I imagine they’d be incredibly useful to human civilization.”

On the bed, Jon sighed.Some of the raspiness starting to leave his lungs as Bones happily slurped at his shoulder.

Lois pressed her hand to her mouth, her eyes shining while Clark pulled her to his chest, her back to his front.He curled his arm around his wife’s shoulder, both of them facing their son and watching as the aliens tried to save him.

Beside her, Linda tugged her closer, pressing her mouth to Alex’s jaw in comfort.Alex’s eyes remained glued on Jon, trying to be ready for any signs of further distress.

“Thank you.”The word’s startled her enough that she jerked away from Linda, eyes seeking out Lois who had spoken.The star reporter was not, however, looking at her.Instead her focus was on Alex’s girlfriend.“I understand what this must have cost you… to bring us here.We won’t betray your trust.Even if— just thank you.”

Linda eyed her, her own hand tightening around Alex’s as she shifted uncomfortably.“It’s fine Miss—”

“Lois.My name is Lois Lane Kent and this is my husband Clark Kent.”

“Linda Taylor.”The blonde returned, offering them a small timid smile.Alex’s chest warmed at the sight.Linda shouldn’t be scared of her family—she shouldn’t be afraid of anyone—but she was sincerely happy that Lois was being so gracious.

A noise from outside pulled their attention and Linda tilted her head with a frown, eyes closing briefly in pain.

“You ok?”Alex asked, voice rough from the stress of her emotions.She rubbed her thumb over Linda’s knuckles trying to sooth whatever hurt her girlfriend was feeling.

“Yeah.”Linda answered distractedly, opening her eyes and giving Alex a tight smile.“Yeah, I’m ok.I just need to step outside for a moment.Can I—will you be alright in here?”

Alex nodded, releasing her hand and watching her go back the way they had come.

She missed her already, her hand cold now where it had been safely ensconced in Linda’s warmth.

Ni came back with a bowl of paste and gestured to Lois.“I’ll need his mother.”

Which translated into her and Clark being summarily pushed from the bedside and moving to stand off towards the center of the room.

Clark folded his big arms across his chest, standing parallel to Alex as they both watched Ni make a small cut into Lois’ hand.

“That thank you applies to you too you know.We wouldn’t have—

“Don’t.He’s every bit mine as he is yours.Don’t treat me like—” She pressed her lips together, her tight hold on her emotions finally snapping.“We’re supposed to be family.You were my brother.”She accused, darting accusing eyes up at him before she had to look somewhere else.“When I was growing up, my parents helped you understand who you were.But when you weren’t with them… Clark you were my _brother_.I thought you were the coolest person in the world.I knew that nothing could touch me because I had the strongest guy in existence watching my back.”

“I’m still that guy Alex.I’m still…”Clark ran a hand through his hair, agitation in every strained muscle of his body. “Do you think I didn’t love you too?That I still don’t?I’d do anything for you!”

“Then where were you?!”She exploded arms lashing out and trying to keep her voice low so as not to disturb the procedure taking place in front of her.“Where were you when I needed you?We called you _every_ day Kal.You never showed.Even after when we’d lost everything… I needed you there and you left me to take care of my mom by myself.We were drowning.How could you _do_ that?”

Clark turned away from her, his large hands wiping at his eyes as he let out a few focused breaths.

Finally, he shook his head, staring straight ahead and trying to fight the wobble in his voice.“I was off planet.There was an incident that required me and Diana’s attention… we were looking for a Martian in distress.By the time your calls got through it was too late.I didn’t know you needed me Alex, I would have been there if I’d known.”He swallowed, his next words broken as the tears finally started falling from his face.“And after… I’d _failed_ you.I’d failed my cousin.I’d seen pictures of her… at the fortress.My father told me stories about her and he said her pod was still active.I’d waited years to be able to meet her.All for me to be absent when she needed me most.How could I face that?How could I—What—I didn’t know what to do.I was barely taking care of myself.What could I have offered you back then but the remains of a broken man?”

“I needed you.”She repeated, because she honestly didn’t know what else to say.Everything hurt and she desperately wished Linda was still beside her.

Clark nodded, his body shaking as he tried to contain old pains from the past.“I know.”His voice shook, and he pressed his fist to his mouth.“I’m sorry.”

And then Alex was wrapping him up in her arms, banding her arms as far as they would go around his broad frame.“I still need you.”

She was tired.

She was so fucking tired.She’d hated him for years—missed him for years.Had been angry because he’d left.Had been angry because he’d never really come back.

There was always something more important.

She was so tired of being seen as expendable.

Clark dropped his arms from her hold, engulfing her in a hug of epic proportions.“I’m here Alex.Whatever you need.I know I’ve screwed up but I love you.I never stopped loving you.And I’m here now, I’m not going anywhere.From now on I’m following you’re lead.”

She exhaled slowly, allowing herself a moment of peace.Maybe her mom was right.Maybe she didn’t have to fight him so hard anymore.They’d both changed.Just because he’d left before didn’t mean he’d leave again.She could try this.

It was ok for her to try this.

“After Jon gets better,” she started, voice slightly muffled in his shoulder.“I need you to help me find my dad… and break into CADMUS.I think I know where Kara is.”

~*~

 

 

“Thank you.”Alex walked behind Linda, the blonde woman seemingly preoccupied with something in the sky.They were a bit away from the rest of the camp, the night sky devoid of many stars, offering them a modicum of privacy.

Linda was standing on an incline, rows of cars-turned-mobile-homes laid out before her.The moon highlighting her in an ethereal glow and making her look more beautiful than should be possible.

The fact that she’d saved Jon’s life twice now may have had something to do with Alex’s increased appreciation.To think she’d ever told Winn to stay away from this woman.How different would her life be now if she’d followed her own advice…

Alex wrapped her arms around the woman from behind, the incline increasing their height difference. Overwhelmed she pressed her forehead between strong shoulder blades.“Thank you.Thank you.Thank you.”

Linda laced their fingers together where Alex held hers against the blonde’s abdomen.

“You never have to thank me Alex.Not for this.”

Alex pressed a kiss to the woman’s shoulder.“I know the risk you took in bringing me here so yeah… I really do.”She clenched her eyes shut, the swell of emotions threatening to choke her as she tried to explain her position.“I’m sorry I yelled… and if I hurt you.I just—he’s the best part of me and—"

Linda turned in her arms, her hands reaching up to cup Alex’s face in her palms, face stern.

“Stop it.”She whispered fervently, the hair that had escaped her ponytail swinging forward to brush Alex’s cheeks.“Stop.You don’t have to explain why you need to save someone’s life.You never have to explain that Alex.There’s never a reason _not to._ I’m the one who should be explaining—”

Alex shook her head, tears leaking onto her cheeks and she pressed up on her toes to seal their mouths together.

It had been a long day and an even longer night.

Linda had taken them on quite the journey to get there, twists and turns that Alex didn’t remember making the last time they had come here.

She understood why.Clark and Lois may have been Alex’s family, but they were threats to Linda’s.

Even understanding, her stress had near quadrupled at the amount of time it had taken to get here.

Luckily, Ni had taken one look at Jon and known what to do.Clark was currently allowing himself to be stabbed at for a blood transfusion.

New platelets; donated mitochondrial cells.

That’s what Ni had described.

2 minutes into taking the tonic, Jon’s breathing had immediately started to get better.And, while Alex had worried about the necessity of any future treatments and what she would need to do to make that happen, Ni had assured her she need not worry so much.

_“As his body grows, his cells grow.No need to give him grown cells, if his are grown.Just Alex, you only need to get him to manhood.”The Krishar smiled, her face only a mouth of sharp teeth.Linda had explained the Krishar was too tired to put on an actual face.Comforting.“Just Alex, we’ll know more in the morning.He’ll be ok for now.”_

Puberty.

That was in another two or so years.

She could keep an eye on him until then.

She’d left the tent a little after Jon had blinked his eyes open, the blue surrounded by burst blood vessels that were just starting to heal.

_“Querencia.”Jon whispered when his eyes finally landed on his best friend._

_“What?”Alex clasped tight to his leg, his hands taken by his parents who were too busy crying to speak.Lois had blubbered at the boy for a solid 5 minutes before he’d even noticed Alex was in the room._

_“Querencia.A place where you draw strength or feel at home.”Jon blinked tiredly, leaning into his mother’s hand as she stroked his cheek.“You’re my querencia Alex.”He closed his eyes as an almost smug grin crossed his face.“You **told** me to read a dictionary, you didn’t say what language.”_

She pulled out of the kiss, nosing along Linda’s cheek before laying her head on her shoulder, suddenly exhausted.Linda brought her arms up, wrapping securely around her and taking on Alex’s weight.

Alex let her, a heaviness leaving her body as she allowed Linda to hold her.

“Alex.”Her girlfriend brought up a hand, fingers threading through Alex’s hair in soothing tugs.“Who was that man?He looked familiar.”

“I told him his disguise was stupid.”The agent nosed along her neck, letting out a rough exhale that was part exhaustion, part annoyance, and part fondness.Big blue idiot.“He looks familiar because the world knows him as Superman.”

She felt Linda tense, and hummed, allowing her hands to gently stroke along her girlfriend’s back.Finding out you’d just saved one of earth’s mightiest hero would be a shock for anyone.

“He’s from Krypton…”

“Mm Hm.”Alex murmured, pulling back slightly to see a bereft look on Linda’s face.“Hey,” she whispered, nuzzling her nose into Linda’s cheek.“What’s wrong?I thought you liked Superman?”

Linda’s lip wobbled, her head tilting to rest against Alex’s.“Yeah, of course.I do like him… I just…It’s not about that.I… have to go away for a while.Nothing major, just… a friend called and I need to go check on them.I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

Alex hummed, resting against Linda’s shoulder once again now that the crisis seemed to be averted.She was also much too far gone to pay close attention to Linda’s words.“Just keep your phone on so I know your ok, please?And, text me if you need me.No matter what time it is.I’ll be there.”She pulled back, staring into clear brown eyes and thanking every God she knew for the woman in front of her.“Whatever you need ok?”

Linda nodded, tugging her back into her arms and surrounding Alex in a feeling she couldn’t quite describe.

~*~

“Who told you that you could do that?!”Lillian seethed, she was inches from Kara’s face, her eyes bright with her anger.

Kara remained silent, the device that had been forced in her mouth preventing any speech she may have tried to give.She was strapped down, sitting forward in a chair like contraption that bent her legs back and away from her.Her hands were tied to two metal tubes and a leather muzzle kept her head angled towards the ceiling in such a way that made breathing difficult; her chin near perfectly lining up with the vertical angle of her neck.

“You behaved recklessly and without orders!You killed those men for what reason?”Kara stared straight up.“Answer me!”

Jolts of electricity entered her body and she choked on her own spit as Kryptonite flooded in her veins; the pain nearly making her jaw clench against the metal in her mouth.

Kara forced an image of Kalasin into her brain.Her baby’s gummy smile, her laugh—different but beautiful.

The power was cut, her body slumping against her restraints before she forced herself to correct her posture.

Lillian didn’t like disrespect.

“Did you find it?”Lillian asked, her voice impatient as another doctor entered the room.

“There appears to be a slight glitch in her programming ma’am.”The doctor tugged nervously at his tie, clearly shaking as he tried to word his response.“During the base software development, she was told ‘kill any who try to kill you.’”

Lillian glared at the man, not questioning who had bothered adding that to Kara’s cortex.She had after all been the only person in the room that day.

“Can you fix it?”

There was nothing to fix, Kara thought.It wasn’t her programming; her implant had never been activated.She hadn’t gone after those men because they’d shot at her.She’d tracked them down because they had tried to hurt someone she cared about.And she knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that if she didn’t go after them, then they would go after Alex.

That wasn’t a hard choice to make.

She’d done that.She’d killed people.Again.

Except it had been _her_ choice this time.

She deserved whatever punishments Lillian levied against her; it would be nothing compared to what she would receive from Rao.

Her choice.

It went against everything she had ever believed.

It went _against_ her programming.

That shouldn’t have been possible.

“Yes ma’am.A new wipe and she—”

“No!You idiot.Do you know how valuable Alex Danvers could be to my unit?The information in that woman’s brain?K-2S0 is _this_ close to bringing me my greatest prize.”She held up her hand, indicating her measure between thumb and index finger.“With her help I might finally be able to get K-3S9 fully operational.The board will approve mass production and we can rid the earth of the alien threat for good.And you want me to throw all of that progress away?”

The man shook his head frantically.“No ma’am.Of course not!It’s just… it’s the only way.”

Lillian’s glare forced an actual whimper from the coward before she was turning back to look at Kara’s profile with calculation.

“No…”A smile came to the hellish woman’s lips and Kara felt an icy ball drop in her stomach.“No, it’s not.Bring me K-3S9.”The man ran from the room, Lillian keeping her pace more dignified as she moved towards Kara.“It seems you need to be reminded of your place in all of this.You are less than a human.You are not to be seen.You are not to be heard.You are not to **exist** outside of the realms where _I_ deem it necessary.I’ll teach you these lessons again and again until you understand them.Study closely.”

Kara knew she was glaring but she couldn’t help it.The anger she felt at Lillian using her _child_ against her… it was insurmountable.She’d never felt like this before.

There was something wrong with her.

Her muscles spasmed in pain as Lillian rebooted her torture mechanism.

There was something wrong.

~*~

**_Late 2010_ **

_The guards were angry.One of them, a large hairy man that Kara despised, slapped the prisoner in the face, his hand larger than her head.It made a resounding snapping sound that made Kara flinch.She couldn’t stand loud noises.They hurt._

_She kept her eyes averted for the rest of the abuse._

_The prisoner, a short woman with a head full of thick curly hair and dark skin, gave as good as she got; cursing, spitting and biting her captors until they finally tasered her and threw her into the cell adjacent to Kara’s._

_The woman groaned, and Kara saw her roll her body into some weird position from her peripheral vision._

_A heavy sigh and a thump._

_“What are you in for?”_

_Kara ignored her.Curling her body more tightly in on itself._

_She missed Alex._

_She missed Eliza and Jeremiah and their home in Midvale._

_She wanted Alex._

_“Hey Kid.I’m talking to you.”_

_Still Kara remained silent.She was sick of talking… living.She just wanted to be left alone.She wanted…_

_She wanted her mom.She missed her parents._

**_They didn’t cut out your tongue, did they?_ **

_Kara startled, her body jumping at the voice that had intruded in her mind.She blinked rapidly and turned at the slight tapping on her cell wall._

_The prisoner was beaming at her, waving animatedly and pointing at her head._

_“That **hurt**.These assholes really know what they’re doing so whaddaya say we don’t do that again Pumpkin?What’s your name?”_

_Kara blinked, massaging her ears and trying to figure out what had just happened.“Kara.”_

_“Hiya!Name’s Katu.How old are you kid?”_

_“I—sixteen.”_

_Katu’s eyebrows shot up.“You look like your twelve.”_

_Kara frowned, holding her arms out and staring down at her body.Eliza and Jeremiah had explained a little about her body and what it needed to survive in Earth’s atmosphere.It hadn’t been much.Just food and sun._

_She hadn’t had either in about 6 months now.The scientists wanted to see how long she could last.As a result, she had lost most of the weight she had brought with her from Krypton.Her last weigh in had her at about ninety pounds.Her hair had started falling out two days ago._

_Katu had been generous saying she looked like a twelve-year-old.Kara was pretty sure she looked like a freak._

_She turned away from the woman, laying back down on her cot and curling back into her ball._

_“Hey!No.Come on kid, I was just making an observation.Don’t leave me hangin here.What are you here for?”_

_“To die.”_

_Kara was fairly certain that was true.All the effort her family had put into sending her away from Krypton and she was still destined to die.Rao had willed it so and they had been foolish to try to defy him.She could have died on Krypton with her family; instead she would be sentenced to a slow and painful end at the hands of demons._

_“That’s pretty morbid.I’m guessing you’ve been in here for a while.”_

_Kara didn’t respond._

_Katu sighed, and there were more sounds from her cell.A quick glance saw her in a handstand.Kara frowned but looked away._

_“I just got here.Obviously.Not my idea of a good time.But it does mean that I still have some optimism.So, allow me to share before they beat it out of me.”_

_There was silence and Kara waited impatiently before finally turning her head to see if the other woman was ok._

_She was._

_Katu grinned at her from a lotus pose on the floor.“Hi.”_

_This woman was weird._

_…but she had piqued Kara’s curiosity.Enough so that she moved off her cot and moved to sit cross legged across from Katu._

_“Hello.”She said, her face set and ready for whatever knowledge this woman thought she could share._

_“Well, don’t you just have the most beautiful accent.Where are you from Sugar?”_

_Kara paused, considering before realizing that there wasn’t much more harm that could be bestowed upon her.“Krypton.”_

_Katu whistled.“Sounds far.I’m from Brooklyn, NY.If you ever go there, get the pizza.Fuck everybody else’s pizza.If it ain’t Brooklyn it ain’t real.Got it?”_

_Kara nodded seriously.Alex had shown her the basic outline of the Americas; her friend had wanted to go to California though.NY was something that Kara had dreamed of because of James and the Giant Peach.Required reading for her first and only week of school._

_“I appreciate the recommendation but I am not going to get out of here.”_

_“Doom and gloom kid.Geez!Listen, you’re young and able and you have me now.There’s always a chance.”Kara remained looking skeptical, her fingers twitching restlessly where they rested in her lap.“Ah kid, come on.Tell me about your life.What have you done so far?”_

_“My life?”Kara bit her lip, feeling the skin give way and try to restitch itself._

_Katu’s expression finally fell, her body leaning forward slightly to take Kara in._

_“Seriously kid?You’re so focused on your death, that you’ve forgotten about your life?What story do you want people to know?The story of how you died or the story of how you lived?”_

_Kara felt tears prick her eyes.“I just want to go home.”_

_“I’m not sure I can get you there.”Kata murmured sadly.“From what I hear, Superman’s Kryptonian and he said his planet died.”Kara turned away, old feelings of pain and abandonment surfacing.“Hey, we’ll start our own home Pumpkin.Just me and you Sugar.We’ll keep each other sane until we bust out of this hell hole.Whaddaya say?We’ll share the stories of our lives; the patootie and the clown!Has a nice ring to no?”_

_Kara tilted her head puzzled, wiping at her face and asking, “what’s a patootie?”_

 

~*~

“Oh, kid.”

Katu’s voice was soft as the guards marched Kara outside.The Kryptonian forced herself to lift her head, briefly taking in Katu’s concerned face before the woman was forcibly dragged further into CADMUS.The rest of the experiments on her chain gang following behind her, though not without looking at Kara with varying expressions of pity, fear, and anger.

It was ok, she tried to tell them.

It would be ok.

They dumped her in a van, and she lay there, unable to even move her head as they started driving her somewhere.Blood leaked out of the corner of her mouth, the acrid taste of metal sharp on her tongue and pieces of hair clumped in wet red lumps on the side of her face.

She’d broken a few teeth on the metal gag in her mouth and she was pretty sure she had also dislocated her jaw.Everything hurt.

Nothing more than knowing that she had once again failed her daughter.They’d strapped Kalasin down and made her watch.Lillian promising that if Kara so much as sniffled, they’d start in on her daughter as well.

So she’d gone statue still, letting nothing escape.

It was ok.

It would be ok.

She was barely coherent when they dropped her on the floor of her apartment, unable to do much more than breathe.

Lillian had upped the dose of Kryptonite in her watch.She wouldn’t be healing any time soon.

It was ok.

She was going to be ok.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Momma said there'd be days like this, there'd be days like this my mama said...
> 
> Ok, so I know you're mad and... it kinda made me laugh leaving that like that. I didn't realize it at first but then when I was editing I realized where it was left off and that's when I laughed.
> 
> So let's jump into it:
> 
> Kara and Alex are sooo fucking cute. Like sickeningly cute. Like I wish I was capable of loving someone as much as they seem to love each other. That whole first scene was just ugh with the fluff. My poor baby Kara. For those of you who didn't catch it, Kara's saying no one showed up for her? Borrowed from Hancock. Great movie. Charlize Theron is hot.
> 
> And then we have Astra, also hot. No relation. She's going to be a semi big player, but not until later on so this was just kind of her backstory one, and also a reminder that she exists. And yes she is looking for Jeremiah and yes he will be in trouble when she finds him. :)
> 
> Her backstory was another one of the first scenes that I wrote when I started this. I remember specifically writing "Astra, you're breaking my heart." It always bothered me in the show that they kind of pitted the twins against each other. I am not a twin, but I am a sister and man I can't imagine setting my sister up the way Alura did Astra. I need to believe that there was something else going on. Especially because Non was the one who killed the guard. It just hurt my head. Plus, not saying all twins are like this but my family is pretty famous for having multiples. THEY ARE FUCKING ANNOYING. Omg, it just may be that my heart is grinch like but man they cannot function without the other. Like they touch each other all the time, and sleep together and eat together and study together and read together and everything. I'm pretty sure that they would shower together if they could. They're obsessed. As annoying as it is to watch, I actually really find the synamic cute when I read about it, and so Astra and Alura are two halves of a whole. Yay.
> 
> Alex adulting with her friends is always a grand time. Time will start to be important here as we tick down to doomsday.
> 
> And Kara killing- I know in the show she wouldn't have but this isn't the show. Kara was essentially tortured for the entirety of the life she remembers. To her, humans are not kind they are threats. She chooses to give people a chance but the individuals in question have proven that they cannot be trusted. Her love for Alex, her fear at them coming back for her allowed her to make the decision to eliminate the threat. No one can come after Alex, if there is no one to come after Alex. She's not a monster or a killing machine, but she sees necessity and takes action. I hope I wrote that well enough to translate all that...
> 
> And then we have Jon. So in the comic this actually happens and Jon dies. The mixture of Clark and Lois' DNA in him leads to a genetic abnormality and he dies of the illness. Now, in the comic he's unknowingly saved by some robot fella I forget, maybe Braniac actually but I'm too tired to check. Anyway, comic Superman tragically loses his son and never gets him back. MY superman ALMOST tragically loses his son but due to the combined efforts of the cousing he abandoned and the "sister" who he left high and dry, his son is saved. Irony. And also a nice little semi relationship repair. Not complete but they're working on it.
> 
> Someone asked me how often Kara is supposed to check in to CADMUS. She has to give mission updates and reports for any new or pertinent information she comes across and she needs to go periodically to check her memories aren't coming back and that she has enough kryptonite in her system. Now for this particular instance she was supposed to go in because she was injured. Any injury necessitates an immediate report or its an OSHA violation. #facts.
> 
> The scene with Lillian and Kara; two things. 1. Lillian's line where she says 'study closely' is from avatar master Pakku. One of my favorite scenes, Katara was a BAMF. 2. There is nothing wrong with Kara, she is healing and starting to feel more and remember more. She was basically a memoryless driod before so of course she's going to think something is wrong with her. Nothing is.
> 
> You guys got TWO flashbacks, you lucky devils you. I'm so happy for you. I only advise that you brace yourselves... Winter is coming...
> 
> I couldn't help it. I'm sorry....
> 
> Please feel free to comment, I really do enjoy hearing from you guys. It makes my day. I just sit in a bubble of happiness as the servers melt down around my head and I question all my life choices as my boss unhelpfully asks if I could keep them on just a little. Sure bro.
> 
> Anywho!
> 
> Stay safe my lovelies, don't be jerks.
> 
> ~Chronicles


	16. Now That the World Isn't Ending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!
> 
> Sorry for the delay, I kind of lost track of my days there *nervous laugh*
> 
> Anywho, here is the long awaited chapter. Is Alex going to find Kara? Of course not. That would be entirely to tragically romantic. What am I a masochist?
> 
> Also, I frickin hate the new super suit. It looks like a bad power rangers meets megaman meets ironman modpodge nightmare. But I'm sure they tried...
> 
> And yes, that is another Nickelback song in the Chapter title. Sue me, I actually really liked Nickelback back in the day. :)
> 
> Nickelback: Hero

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After getting shot in the shoulder, Kara wakes up almost good as new prompting Alex to ask more about her past.
> 
> Kara can't tell her much because of her memory and programming but she does say that CADMUS told her that no one wanted her. Alex says she wants her and we all melted into a pile of goo.
> 
> Following up on a cure for Jon, Alex meets with Astra the only other genius alien that Alex knows who might be able to help.
> 
> We learn Non is an asshole, Astra is a badass and Alex is too quick to jump to conclusions.
> 
> Astra tells her about Krytpon and agrees to help Alex in exchange for renewing their partnership in finding Kara.
> 
> With several balls in the air so to speak, Alex meets with her friends and checks in on their individual tasks. Everyone is pissed about the shooting but super cheerful and supportive of the growth Alex is showing by not flying by the seat of her pants.
> 
> Meanwhile, Kara has gone on her own little sidequest to take out the people who shot up Alex's apartment. In an attempt to keep Alex safe she interrogates and kills them before going to check in at CADMUS.
> 
> Before she can go in though, she hears Alex screaming for her from her apartment. 
> 
> She flies back and after a moral dilemma decides to trust the small Kent family and take them to the refugee camp.
> 
> Ni saves Jon and Alex and Clark bridge the divide.
> 
> Unable to put CADMUS off any longer, Kara goes in and is immediately punished for taking so long and killing the people who were sent after Alex. They torture her to teach her a lesson and make Kalasin watch. Kara's abnormal hate and anger towards Lillian makes her think she is malfunctioning, when in reality she is healing.
> 
> Lillian increases the Kryptonite in her watch and dumps her body back in her apartment.

** Now That the World isn’t Ending (it’s love that I’m sending to you) **

_"I do not appreciate that Vicky injured you.Why did she perform that move if you were so close?"_

_They were walking home from school after Alex's soccer practice.It was only Kara's second week and, while she still felt overwhelmed from the various stimuli she was being exposed to, she always opted to wait for Alex rather than making the trek alone._

_Usually they would ride Alex's bike, Kara easily balancing on the back pegs and using her powers so that Alex didn't overexert herself.Today, however, Alex had had to leave her bike chained at school since the ice pack on her ankle would not have allowed her to perch on it at all._

_She had also refused to call her mother to come get her.Jeremiah had been missing for more than a week now and Alex refused to add any more stress to her plate._

_She sighed as she hobbled along, her arm braced on Kara's shoulder, Kara's arm banded around her waist._

_"She didn't mean to, it was an accident."She insisted for what felt like the millionth time.In truth she kind of felt like Vicky had meant it; the brunette had been especially icy ever since Kara had enrolled._

_"It was a very stupid accident."Kara concluded, stopping them in front of their shortcut through the woods."This will not work in there… “She pulled her bottom lip between her teeth, eyes full of worry._

_Alex wanted very much to wipe that expression off her face._

_"Piggy back ride!"Her shout echoed slightly as she leapt from her good foot onto Kara's back.The blonde startled but didn't budge under Alex's slight weight; her hands reaching up automatically to brace Alex's thighs against her hips."Getty up!I get best friend privileges."_

_Kara offered her a bemused smile over her shoulder but started walking as per Alex's request."I see.Do all best friends do this then?Will I get a turn once you are healed?"_

_"Eh," Alex hemmed, pressing her face into Kara's neck."This is more of a really strong Kryptonian job.I'm just a lowly human girl.No muscles.Just puny.Don't have to."_

_Kara's laugh echoed through the trees and made Alex smile.She loved when her girl let her guard down and her own natural sound was heard.It always sounded like music._

_"How was art club?"Alex asked, content to remain plastered to Kara's back._

_The Kryptonian easily carried her on the path, chatting animatedly about her after school activities. Despite her appreciation for Earth art, and thus art class, Kara had not taken well to school as a whole.The kids there were mean, and most of Alex's classes were on the opposite side of the building.They didn't even have the same lunch period.The separation had caused her to try to tune into Alex's heartbeat when she felt anxious... except that usually caused her to hear everyone else too and her reactions of pain were fodder for teenagers._

_As far as the other children at school knew, Kara was a student seeking asylum in the United States.Her parents had been friends with Alex's parents and had been doctors in Syria.The war had forced them to send their child to safety in the US.Alex's dad had thought the story would help with Kara's flinching at loud noises, not liking to be touched, and frequent 'headaches'.It had to an extent, but when Kara couldn't focus on the text, or had trouble translating some English words into Kryptonian, her reputation as a 'freak' had been solidified._

_Alex had gotten into more than one fight for someone calling her "special" or "retard" and she didn't regret any of them.Eliza had been pissed and claimed she was putting them at risk by drawing attention to their situation.Alex didn't really care about that so long as Kara's face didn't look like it was set to cry at any moment._

_Although, to be fair, even the young alien had asked her to stop putting herself at risk.Kara didn't like seeing Alex in trouble as much as Alex didn't like seeing Kara cry.There might also have been the small point of Kara hating seeing Alex hurt, but she had chosen to ignore that part._

_Kara's babbling trailed off suddenly, the blonde stopping and tilting her head, streaks of gold highlighting her hair and blue eyes in the setting sun._

_"What is it?"Alex asked, wiggling slightly to be let down."Do you hear a wolf?I totally bet Dad there was a wolf here!He owes me money after Mom murders him for being gone this long."_

_Kara gave her an amused smile."No, it's not a wolf."She paused, face scrunching adorably in concentration."It's just a … feeling I guess.I hear…There's an absence of sound.Does that make sense?"_

_"Not really."Alex frowned, taking in the sound of the wind hitting the trees."But if you say something's wrong, I believe you.What do you wanna do?Make a run for it?We're only a few minutes from home."_

_Kara continued to look off into the distance, eyes unfocused and Alex knew she was using her X-Ray vision.Finally, she sighed."No.That's ok.Eliza sounds like she's in a mood anyway.I don't want you to have to deal with that any sooner than you absolutely have to."_

_Kara may not have been human, but she’d picked up on Earth cues fairly quickly and she knew enough to know that Eliza’s ‘moods’ were not exactly normal.Alex was truly worried about her mom, after her dad had stopped coming home she’d slowly started to decline.She was paranoid about everything and everybody; practically shoving Kara into school to avoid further scrutinization from the local law enforcement agencies.She’d stopped going into work, choosing to work from her lab at home instead._

_At her heart she was still Eliza, just more… wired; more excitable.A new development that didn’t clash well with Alex’s headstrong personality.She was **always** on Alex’s case to be more careful; to ‘look after Kara, Alex’.‘Don’t let Kara get into any trouble Alex.’‘She’s your responsibility Alex.’_

_As if Kara were some sort of puppy that Alex had begged for and refused to walk.It grated on her nerves._

_Only Kara’s soft reassurances that Eliza was acting out of worry for Jeremiah had been enough to stop her blowing up at the woman.And even only then because the words had been coming from Kara.The alien had explained a lot about life on Krypton and apparently parents and elders were held in the highest esteem.If Alex were to talk back to Eliza, she’d be letting Kara down in a big way and she didn’t want to do that._

_The small tiny voice in the back of her brain that was trying it’s hardest to survive her bout of adolescence also whispered that she was scared of hurting Eliza worse than what Jeremiah had already accomplished.Her dad was a real asshole in Alex’s book at the moment and she didn’t want to add to her mother’s pain even an iota._

_So, she and Kara had taken to avoiding the house when Eliza got into one of her moods, taking the long way home; going to the beach.Whatever they could do to prolong the inevitable._

_Alex rolled her eyes."Thanks.I'd like to avoid the lecture."She gestured at her ankle and Kara gave her a sympathetic smile."Whaddaya say?Another piggy back?"_

_Kara's smile slowly spread, and then Alex found herself against a tree."In a minute.I wanted to give you something to think about for later when you and Eliza ‘talk’."_

_A scowl, "talking is putting it mildly."Alex grumbled."I'll somehow be blamed for global warming-- oh!"_

_Her words were cut off by Kara's lips pressing to the corner of her mouth; the blonde placing small kisses until their lips were fused together.And yeah, this would definitely help for later._

_They had never really talked about any of this after the first time Kara kissed her.Alex hadn't asked her to stop, and Kara hadn't given any signs that she wanted to.They also hadn't told anyone else, and Kara had never kissed her in front of anyone else.It was like she could sense Alex wouldn't be comfortable with that.Although, being honest, Alex knew that had way more to do with her confused feelings around her own sexuality than her feeling any shame in regard to Kara._

_Because Kara was ethereal.She was magic, and sunshine and she tasted so fucking good.Alex's hands tugged at Kara's waist, pulling her closer as she slipped her tongue into the blonde's mouth.Kara sighed, body shuddering as her fingers played with the hairs at the nape of Alex's neck.They were so close Alex could feel Kara’s heart thudding in her chest, just as elevated as Alex’s.She loved holding her close like this, the feel and shape of her body… This was amazing, this was--_

_"Birds." Kara mumbled, words caught in the kiss, body tensing ever so slightly._

_"What?" Alex continued kissing her, although Kara was becoming increasingly unresponsive.She finally gave up, looking at the concentrated expression on Kara's face._

_"That's what's missing.I can't hear the birds."_

_There was a moment of complete silence as Alex took in her words, realization making her notice she couldn't hear any animals at all.And then Kara collapsed, hands clutching her head as her face went red from whatever was hurting her._

_The blonde gasped, but clenched her teeth, trying to remain as quiet as possible.Alex wanted to ask her what was happening, but then she heard it._

_Footsteps._

_Kara stood, unsteadily getting to her feet, and gesticulating wildly at Alex to get on her back.The brunette complied, wrapping her arms around the girl, and holding on.They barely made it a few feet before Kara crashed to the ground again, the sound of the fall echoing in Alex's ears as she heard the distant sound of a helicopter._

_Shit._

_She grabbed Kara by the arms, dragging her along behind her as she hobbled towards their house.She had to get her home.If she could get them home, they'd be fine._

_Her mom would—_

_She threw herself at the alien, tackling her and covering her brighter clothing with her darker ensemble.The beam from a flashlight appearing where her head had been.They waited with baited breath, Kara's face still marked by pain, until the beam left._

_"It's ok."Alex whispered, eyes searching their surroundings as her ears strained to pick up any signs of danger."He's gone.We need to figure out how to get out of here."_

_“Alex, they have guns.”_

_Alex clenched her jaw, hands gripping Kara tightly to her as she thought out their options.“That’s fine, you’re bulletproof.We just need to get away from whatever is disabling you.It’s a sound, right?Probably something on a high frequency… that’s why there are no animals.It hurt them, so they ran.”_

_As if on cue, Kara’s face scrunched in agony, her body bowing as whatever she was hearing was elevated.Somewhere in the distance a gunshot sounded, and Alex flinched, sweat dripping down her face.She didn’t know what to do._

_Fuck._

_She dug in her pocket, pulling out her cellphone and quickly tapping to Clark’s contact info.He hadn’t responded to anything they’d sent him in **months** but maybe now…_

_He was Superman; nick of time and all that right?_

_Except her call wouldn’t connect, the message on the screen telling her she had no service._

_Fuck._

_Kara was trembling now, her voice strained and shaky, and her hand reaching out to grasp Alex's."Alex, I have a plan.Do you trust me?"_

_Alex looked down at her, swallowing back her fear and nodding."With my life."_

_It was such a cliché thing to say, she winced internally at the cheesiness of it all.This was so not how she imagined dying.This wasn’t how she imagined **Kara** dying.She was supposed to protect her.That’s what you did for the people you loved right?You protected them.Alex loved Kara.She knew she was just a stupid teenager, but her feelings were valid even if they did disappear into the ether one day… _

_Alex had a feeling these wouldn’t._

_Which didn’t matter because they were probably about to join Romeo and Juliet on the list of dead idiot teenagers in love._

_Stupid._

_Fuck._

_She hoped her mom would be ok. **Please let her get through this**._

_Kara smiled at her, hand leaving hers and cupping the back of Alex's head to tug her down into a quick kiss.She pulled back, her hands framing Alex’s face, blue eyes sad but serene."I love you very much Alex Danvers.Don't hate me forever ok?"_

_Wait—what?_

_Instincts kicked in and made Alex tense, body alert for danger, but it was too late._

_There was no pain, just darkness._

~*~

 

Alex was beyond exhausted when she finally made it in to CatCo on Wednesday morning.She’d just had the literal weekend from hell.Saturday some idiots had ruined date night and _shot_ her girlfriend.Which would have been enough of a shit storm except that on Sunday, when she’d thought things were looking up, after Linda had healed up… Jon had taken a turn for the worse.

Alex had never been so scared in her life.

Those minutes she’d banged on Linda’s door with no answer… She’d felt beyond lost.

She’d promised herself after she’d lost Kara that she would never rely on anyone for anything again.That she’d stop looking to other people to solve her problems or come to her rescue.She’d worked for _years_ to make sure she’d never _need_ anyone.

All for her to wind up in this moment, staring helplessly at Linda’s door as her knocks went unanswered.The only way she knew to help Jon was to get him to a Krishar, and the only person who could get her to a Krishar was Linda.

Linda who Alex had trusted.

Linda who Alex had thought she might be able to lean on.

Her chest felt heavy—everything felt heavy.He was going to die.He was going to die, and it would be all her fault.

Fuck.

But then Linda had answered and had shown Alex once again the reason she cared so much about this woman.She was irreplaceable.

Alex had called Hank and told him she’d need to take a day to keep an eye on Jon.Ni had given him the all clear for the moment but had warned both Alex and his parents that he would need further treatment.Apparently his Kryptonian and Human genetics were having it out inside of him and he would periodically need DNA injections from both of his parents to even out the playing field.

Ni believed that while the blood transfusion had worked to save him on Sunday, it wouldn’t be enough as he continued to age.So now Alex had a new task in finding a more permanent way to both monitor and treat what Ni called a ‘genetic instability’.Kal was going to bring her all of the Kryptonian crystals the fortress had on Kryptonian genetics and they were going to go through it together.

The man might act like a large oaf but his Kryptonian brain allowed him to learn at speeds Alex was more than a little jealous of.Between the two of them they should be able to come up with something no problem.

She’d also planned on asking Linda for any insight she had.Her girlfriend seemed vastly knowledgeable about alien species and might know something that could be useful.And, after Alex figured this out, she was moving her priority to saving Linda from whatever trouble she was in.

Linda had risked herself and her morals time and again for Alex, asking nothing in return.She’d put herself out on the limb and it was high time Alex joined her.

…Except she wasn’t at work.

Agent Jones had glanced at Alex askance as she came in, her smooth brown skin making Alex slightly self-conscious about her own possible blemishes.

“You lost Danvers?”

“Hardly.What are you doing here?”Alex asked as she stepped next to the woman, near Cat’s elevator.

“Director said you were taking a few days for a ‘family emergency’.He sounded pretty worried.Don’t tell me you played hooky?”

Alex had just started to shake her head negatively when Cat’s piercing voice interrupted their conversation.The CEO sneering at her from her fishbowl office.

“Yes, Agent Scully.Please do tell us where you have been.”

“My nephew went into early kidney failure.”Alex stated, completely deadpan and _daring_ Cat to say something else.To her surprise, the CEO merely deflated at that, the anger leaving her body quickly as she ran a hand down her face.She tilted her chin towards her office and Alex followed her inside, something gnawing at her belly. 

“So, you haven’t heard from Linda?”Cat asked as soon as they were within the relative privacy of the enclosed room.“I’d hoped the two of you had snuck off somewhere together.”

Alex frowned and shook her head.“No.The last time I saw her was Sunday… she did say she had to help a friend, and that she was going away but with Jon… I wasn’t really paying too much attention.”

“Is he ok?Your nephew?”Cat walked around her, going to her candy bar and scooping some M&Ms into a cup.Her own version of sobriety.

“Yeah.”Alex muttered distractedly as she tried to call Linda.Voicemail.Again.She was going to have to have a talk with the woman about answering her phone.“Did she not call out?”

“Just an email.”Cat mumbled behind a mouthful of candy, a true testament to how worried she was.“It was bland; generic.Possibly written by the kidnappers that have already managed to take her overseas.Even Saoirse has started to look worried.”

“Who?”Alex asked instead of touching the dramatic and unlikely scenario of Linda being kidnapped.

Cat gave her an annoyed look.“Siobhan.”

“Ah.”Alex glanced out the glass wall to see Siobhan periodically glaring at her computer screen before glaring at Linda’s empty desk.“It’s probably nothing.Go back to work Cat, you keep going like this and people are going to find out how much you care about her.”

Cat nodded, her eyes somewhere faraway and Alex left the office, a new worried feeling settling in as she typed out a quick message for Linda to call her as soon as she could.

“You shouldn’t lower yourself.”Cat’s voice stopped her on the way out the door and she glanced back at the CEO curiously.That is until her brain caught up and her blood started to boil.

“Excuse me?”If Cat was saying what she thought she was saying…

“You’re doing a disservice to yourself and the people who care about you when you sully yourself with things beneath you.”

Alex ground her teeth, taking a step towards Cat, and trying not to scream.“Linda _is not—”_

“Oh hush!”Cat waved her hand, annoyance painted across her features as she popped more candy into her mouth.“My assistant is amazing. _You_ are lucky to be in her presence… but I have also watched you Agent Scully and I know that _you_ are not too shabby either.”Cat sighed, shaking her head hopelessly as she took Alex in.Alex herself, felt strangely put out… and also very confused.“You’re not FBI Scully.No FBI agent is as talented or as intelligent.Which means that this is shit duty for you and, instead of fighting your way back to the top, you’ve allowed yourself to… what exactly?Stagnate?Rot?Become a true millennial?”

“I—”

Cat rolled her eyes.“I see how you look at my assistant, the thing is people drift away from stagnant idiots.Try not to be one Scully.”

It was a dismissal if Alex had ever heard one, and she slowly turned away and walked back to the floor.Jones offered a concerned smile and pushed off the wall to stand next to her.

“You should go be with your kid Danvers.I’ve got this.I’m already here, no use in the both of us facing the ire of Cat Grant.”

Jones kicked her lightly in her boot, a teasing smile on her lips.Alex nodded distractedly, forcing a smile on her own face.

“Yeah. Yeah, you’re right.Thanks Jones.”

The woman saluted her before resuming her post.

A quick glance at Winn’s desk showed the man was nowhere to be seen and so Alex started heading towards the elevator, weighing her options in her head.

“You should check on her.”Alex nearly jumped out of her skin when Siobhan snuck up on her, but she was happy to see she merely flinched at the surprise.“K—Linda.You should check on Linda.”

Alex squinted at her, trying to figure out her play, and choosing to ignore whatever nasty name Siobhan had been about to call her girlfriend.As far as Alex knew, the two of them despised each other.So why the sudden concern?

“Why?”

The woman shifted uncomfortably, her words coming haltingly.“My family… we feel things.I have a bad feeling.”

Alex shifted closer, seeing the woman in a new light.“Are you an alien?”

“No.”Siobhan said, now amused.“I’m a human, my family just has… a talent I guess you could say.”

Alex nodded thoughtfully, interesting… but not really important at the moment.“I’ll see you tomorrow Ms. Smythe.”

Siobhan shook her head.“Probably not.”

Alex stepped onto the elevator.

She thought about the conversations she’d had all the way down to the main lobby, working every word over in her head.

Which is why she nearly died when the door opened, and Winn yanked her out unceremoniously.

“Is Linda seriously not with you?”The small man shook Alex by the shoulders, eyes frantic.“Oh man.I knew I should’ve worried.But then you weren’t answering your phone either, so I figured you were just up to sexy times ya know?And I _know_ how long it’s been since you—”

Alex slammed her hand over his mouth.“ _Winn_! Shut up and calm the fuck down.”

She dropped her hand, wiping it on her jeans and feeling adequately grossed it.

Winn flapped his hands, a black envelope nearly slapping Alex in the face as he panicked.“But what if she—”

“She’s _fine._ I put a tracker in her necklace, it shows that she’s at her place.I’m going there now.I’ll let you know as soon as I know anything.”Winn opened his mouth to protest but Alex cut him off.“No, I need you here.I trust Jones, but I’d prefer to have eyes and ears at all times and you’re the only one who won’t block me.And, I know this is scary, but I _did_ have Linda up late on Sunday, her sleep schedule might just be off from that.I’ll check, and you’ll be my second call.”

“Second?”Winn looked slightly offended and Alex smiled at his expense.

“Yeah, sorry.”She wasn’t sorry at all.“Cat’s already claimed first call.What’s in your hand?”

Winn looked down at the envelope and gave her a full-blown Cheshire grin.“Well this is me getting bumped up to first call.”Alex gave him an unimpressed look and he deflated… slightly.“So, you know how you and Linda were supposed to have a romantic candlelit dinner for two at your place on Saturday and have sexy times—”

“Stop saying sexy times.”

“Well, it got interrupted first by Jon—adorable kid, horrible timing—and then by some Alex the Agent Slayer wannabes. Felicity told me how hard you worked to make that happen, what with you actually _cooking_ and all and I felt bad.So I may or may have—”

“That’s not the saying.”

“Used Cat’s letterhead to score you tickets to wait for it—Hamilton.”

Alex blinked.“Hamilton?”

Winn frowned, waving the envelope in her face as if that would somehow grant cognition.“Dude, the musical?These tickets are _impossible_ to get.Linda’s gonna love this!”

“Linda likes musicals?”

Winn blinked.“Ok, do you guys even _talk_ or is it _just_ sexy— hey!"

Alex scowled at him, her hand slightly stinging from where she’d hit him upside the head.She shifted uncomfortably though at his question.She and Linda _did_ talk.They talked about _everything_.At least Alex had thought they did.But then on Christmas, her _mom_ had known Linda was afraid of the dark and Alex had had no idea.And Winn had gotten her that art set, whereas Alex thought Linda’s mentioning that she liked to draw was a hobby thing not an actual talent.Like when people said they know how to ‘play tennis’, no one _knew_ how to play tennis.You just held a racket and prayed unless you were Swedish or a William’s sister.After seeing that painting she’d done for Alex’s mom, she was one hundred percent certain that it was not just a hobby.Or at least it shouldn’t be.Linda was crazy talented.And Alex didn’t pay attention.She didn’t know _anything_ about the woman and she wanted to share a life with her?

What the hell was she thinking?

“Hey!”Winn’s voice pulled her from her spiraling thoughts and she jerked her eyes up to meet his.“Stop that right now.I was _joking_ Alex.I know that you know her, you just don’t know everything about her.But that’s a good thing!It leaves some mystery, it gives you something to look forward to.Linda and I had our own marathon one day, but since you had already claimed movies, I claimed the theater.We went to the community theater on Seton and watched their ‘Musical Spectacular’.Linda loved it; girl has got a killer voice.I just thought you two would love Hamilton _together._ You’re not a bad girlfriend Alex, you care, and you listen.You’ve already won half the battle, all you have to do now is show up.”

And that’s how Alex found herself standing on Linda’s doorstep.She had bypassed the bell, sneaking in when another tenant was leaving and making her way up to the 5th floor easily.And she would have knocked, but something was telling her not to.

Plus… 

She might not have wanted to relive even an inkling of the last time she was there.Jon’s near death was still extremely raw on her nerves.

So, she picked the lock instead.

It was fine, she had an appointment with Dr. McKay later that evening.She could tell her all about her lack of boundaries and slightly psychotic behavior then.That’s what she was there for anyway, right?

The apartment was dimly lit, the curtains drawn, and windows shut.Alex slowly closed the door behind her, her senses on high alert.Linda _always_ had her curtains open.She loved the sunlight streaming into her home and often curled up in the middle of a beam of sun.Alex thought it was adorable.

But now… maybe Linda really had left.Maybe Alex had picked the lock for no reason and was being a total creep.

She glanced around the open space, seeing no signs of her girlfriend anywhere and took a step towards the bedroom.Her boot stuck slightly on the hardwood floor, a tacky substance making a slight squelching sound as she lifted her foot.She frowned and knelt to get a better look, her phone flashlight shining.

She was on her feet immediately, gun in hand as she cleared the apartment section by section.

Blood. 

That had been blood.

There was more evidence of some sort of injury throughout the living space, red handprints on the counters and fridge, a bloodied shirt on the floor by the couch.

Alex had almost resigned herself to finding a body when Linda came stumbling out of the bathroom.The agent exhaled slowly, stowing her gun as the blonde wrapped her hoodie tighter around herself, her legs bare in the chilly apartment.

Linda’s face was a puffy mess, and her hands were wrapped in bandages.It looked like she hadn’t slept in days, her breathing haggard as her hand wiped away a bloody trail from her bottom lip.

“You’ve looked better.”Alex whispered, moving slowly and deliberately as the woman startled in front of her, her eyes wide as she realized Alex’s presence.

“What are you doing here?”Her voice was scratchy, almost non-existent and Alex knew she’d been screaming.“I told you I’d be away.”

“Cat was worried.”

Linda stared.

Carefully, Alex lay her hand on Linda’s forearm trying to be comforting, but the blonde flinched back almost violently.Her back hit the bathroom door, and she cried out in pain flinching forward again. Alex caught her in her arms before she could fall.

“Who did this to you?”She questioned, trying to keep her voice even and soft as she pushed red-blonde hair strands out of Linda’s face.“Huh?Who did this?”

Linda shook her head, trying to pull out of Alex’s arms, her face pushing against the palm Alex held her cheek with.A small whine escaped her lips, and she bit her lip to contain the small sob that threatened to escape.Alex pulled her closer, trying to gently coax the injured woman into a hug.

Linda collapsed against her, her legs giving out from under her as Alex _just_ managed to catch her shoulders and guide her the rest of the way down.

“Easy baby.”She muttered, feeling gently along Linda’s neck for her pulse.“Easy.It’s ok, I’m not gonna hurt you.Can you tell me who did this?”Linda shook her head, a hefty convulsion going through her body as more blood entered her mouth.“Shit.Easy.”Linda’s pulse was slightly elevated, but not fast enough that Alex was really concerned at the moment.Her hands though… When Alex pulled back the bandages on Linda’s hands, she could smell the burned flesh.Her girl’s hands were a raw red, blood and pus intermingling to make a kind of pink foam over some of the cracked skin.Despite the horrendous nature of the injury, the burns weren’t new.A day old at least.Linda had just healed from a high caliber bullet to the shoulder in less than 8 hours.This should have been child’s play.Except, it clearly wasn’t.“Oh, baby… what happened?Why aren’t you healing?”Alex maneuvered them so that Linda’s torso was laying in her lap, her head securely lifted on Alex’s shoulder.She reached up and gently turned Linda’s head towards her, the blonde moaning slightly at the movement but again pressing her cheek into Alex’s palm.

“It’s ok.”She slurred.“I’m ok.”

“Linda.”Alex gently patted her cheeks, stroking the skin with her thumb when Linda finally opened fever brown eyes and looked at her.“Hey baby… why aren’t you healing?I need you to tell me what to do.What’s wrong?”

Linda shook her head, but her eyes turned to the watch she always wore.

She’d worn it everywhere Alex could remember.Even when they had sex.

“Is this bad?”Alex asked, lifting the wrist with the offending object closer to her face.The area around the watch was clearly inflamed, the skin swollen and so bloated that Alex couldn’t even see her blood vessels.“Can I take this off baby?”

“They’ll know… and come… please don’t.”Linda rasped, trying and failing to pull her wrist away.

Alex felt a tear trek down her nose, the wetness resting on her upper lip for a moment before dropping off her face.Linda was clearly in pain, the damage to her body didn’t seem too bad to the outward eye.If it hadn’t been for the ligature marks on her neck and the state of her hands, Alex could have assumed her face was puffy from crying.

It wasn’t.

And it seemed the damage to her internal body was severe.The blood she was wiping away, nearly black in color, indicating something from her GI tract.

Alex had seen injuries like this before, and they weren’t from normal wear and tear; weren’t from some random encounter like a mugging gone wrong.No, someone had deliberately _tortured_ the woman in her arms.The fact that Linda had taken her to the alien camp under duress right before this happened… Alex didn’t believe in coincidences.

But she also couldn’t see Ni allowing _anyone_ to do something like this.

Maybe Ni really wasn’t in charge?

Alex fit her fingers beneath the metal band of the watch, trying to find a seam that she would be able to work with.She winced when Linda convulsed again, and Alex felt the watch heat briefly.

It was injecting her with something.

Or sending out some sort of pulse… this was pretty hi-tech.Like the device behind her ear.

Assholes.

She tested Linda’s weight first, not wanting to cause her further pain or injury, before she rose with the woman; one arm tucked securely under her legs and the other banded around her back.

Even with the precaution, her girlfriend still released a whimper.

Alex moved quickly, trying to eliminate the stress on Linda’s body, and lay her on her bed.That done, she gently started removing Linda’s clothes, cataloguing every bruise, burn, or puncture.

There weren’t many, which meant these people were professionals.

Walking back to the kitchen, Alex grabbed a medium pot and filled it with warm water. Next was a trip to the bathroom where she grabbed the most bland soap Linda had, some towels and a wash cloth.She would have gotten the first aid kit as well, except Linda didn’t really have one.

It was something that Alex had noticed but forgotten to rectify during her previous visits to the apartment.A decision that was now coming back to bite her in the ass.

She’d have to make do.

Alex pulled her phone out, tapping on Felicity’s contact number and balancing the items in her hands as she made her way back to the bedroom.

Linda was where she left her, just no longer conscious.

“Fe, I need your help.I need you to come to this address.”

~*~

The first time Kara became aware of her surroundings after being dumped in her apartment she’d had to throw up.Her arms had burned when she’d pushed herself to a staggered standing position, but she’d made it to the sink.That was when she realized her hands were covered in blood and pus.

She couldn’t feel it though.

She’d actually wondered if they were even attached, it had been her last thought before she’d fainted on her kitchen floor.

The second time she’d been aware, it had been nighttime, and she’d had to pee.Except she couldn’t figure out the mechanics of using a toilet with her injuries, so she’d stumbled into her bathtub instead.

When she’d turned the water on was when her real trouble started.Everything _burned._ She’d choked back a scream, even now the image of Kalasin in that damn chair serving as a deterrent to her making any kind of noise.

She’d passed out in the shower.

The next time she’d managed to get to her closet at least and put on some loose clothing.The first shirt she’d put on however, had gotten stained with the blood on her hands and she knew she’d have to do something about them.

Exhausted and probably not completely coherent due to her pain, she’d found some gauze that Alex had left there when she’d treated her gunshot wound and wrapped her hands.It had been an excruciating experience and she was not wont to repeat it any time soon.

She’d discarded the shirt when she was done, and put on fresh clothes, Alex’s hoodie going on over her naked torso.

It was because it was easier to remove she told herself.

That time, she’d managed to fall asleep on her bed, Alex’s scent luring her to sleep.

She’d woke up needing to use the bathroom again but was once again unable to figure out the toilet and this time, unwilling to subject herself to the bathtub.

Kara had just resigned herself to dying of a full bladder when she noticed Alex in her apartment looking at her like she was afraid she’d break at the slightest movement.She was so far gone by that point that she didn’t even remember what they’d said.

She thought she’d asked Alex to leave maybe?

She knew Alex had stayed.

She knew because the _fifth_ time she’d been aware enough of her surroundings, she’d cried seeing Alex still there, rebandaging her hands.They were ugly tears too, Kara felt her face scrunch up and felt the mess her face became as blood and snot intermingled.It was gross, Alex must have found her disgusting.Except she didn’t leave, the agent had simply wet a cloth and gently wiped at Kara’s cheeks and nose.Alex had kissed her and held her and told her it was going to be ok.

It was the first time Kara believed the words.

~*~

Felicity set Linda’s wrist gently on a stool they had commandeered from the kitchen, the apparatus she had attached to the watch balancing precariously on the wooden surface.

It would have to do.

They were in the living room, Linda now laid out on the couch since Alex had made more than a mess of her bed.

While Alex had ample access to labs and equipment she had no way of getting Linda there without asking for help from a lot more people.She may be learning to rely on her friends and ask for help, but forcing Linda to reveal herself like this…

She couldn’t do that.This was Linda’s life, her story.She had a right to tell it to who she wanted to and so far, she’d only told Alex.Felicity was a necessity though, and she was far enough removed from their situation that Alex was hoping Linda would be ok with it. 

As it was, Linda wasn’t saying anything to anyone.She hadn’t spoken since that first moment Alex had seen her.Since then she’d remained quiet and still, as if she was afraid to move.

Given her current mute state and the injuries she’d incurred, she didn’t think that Linda would be very open to any sort of lab environment.

Her girlfriend was currently staring at Felicity with tired but alert eyes, tracking her every move.Felicity had been very patient; explaining everything she was doing before she did it and making sure to keep her hands visible at all times.

She was treating Linda like an easily scared animal.It made Alex’s stomach roll, and she cradled Linda’s other hand closer to her chest.

“Ready?”Felicity asked, face neutral and open, waiting for Linda’s reply.

Linda didn’t show any indication that she’d heard her, so, after stroking gently down her face, Alex nodded for her.

Felicity returned the gesture before turning to her monitor and starting up the gadget attached to Linda’s arm.

Readings filtered onto her screen, the scanning mechanism breaking down the chemical makeup of the metal band and displaying it on the monitor.

“It’s made of vibranium, like pure vibranium.”Felicity stated, fingers tapping gently at her keyboard.

Alex frowned down at the woman on the bed, her girlfriend still showing no acknowledgement.“ALFA?”

It was a necessary question, but one Alex already knew the answer too.Linda had told her she wasn’t ALFA, so Alex believed her.Simple.

But there were plenty of evil alien and human terrorist groups out there.Linda being a part of any of them made her stomach turn.

“No.”Felicity denied, squinting at her screen.“This is different.They deal in vibranium that’s still unrefined… raw so to speak.This was treated and melted to create the band.It’s also got an octa core Nano processor built in to the face… pretty strong connection… give me a second.”

There was a long pause interspersed with the noise of typing, in which Alex made due with stroking Linda’s hair.Linda remained immobile, but her eyelids fluttered, and she exhaled slowly at the touch.

She’d stopped throwing up blood at this point, but her body still shuddered every now and then from whatever that watch was pumping into her system.

Felicity worked quietly for close on 30 minutes before she spoke again, a worried tone to her voice and eyes glued to her screen.“I’m in their network, they have like two dozen firewalls and a really good IDS in place.I’m gonna need to plant something, hold on…”

More silence.

“These aren’t some mom and pop people Alex.These are professionals.See here,” Felicity swiveled her screen and pointed to a line in a log of data.“these are terabytes of data that they’re collecting from just this watch.”

Alex’s brow pinched in worry.“Audio?”

“No.”Felicity denied, fingers once again moving.“Apparently the audio signal is jammed.I don’t think it’s for lack of trying on their end though.”Her eyes flickered down to Linda and finally her girlfriend responded, curling into a seated position, and hunching in on herself.

Alex moved immediately, dropping Linda’s hand in favor of wrapping her in a loose hug, one she could easily escape from.“Hey, she’s on our side ok?She’s not gonna hurt you.I swear I’m not going to let anyone hurt you.”

“I second that.”Felicity said without pulling her eyes from the screen.“And for the record, however you managed to jam that signal… #badass.”

Linda shuddered again and sagged against Alex’s shoulder, tucking her face into Alex’s neck but allowing Felicity to continue with her probe.

“Please don’t hashtag your words.”

“Please don’t be a stick in the mud your whole life.”

Alex scowled, fingers carding gently through Linda’s hair. “Rude.”

“Whoever set this up was smart, but at the end of the day, it’s technology and if you fry its circuits…” Felicity made to type in more commands, but Linda was already yanking her hand back.

“No.” Linda’s voice was surprisingly firm, but it appeared Felicity’s new role in parenthood had given her precognition.The IT genius was grabbing the blonde’s hand in an attempt to save her tech before Linda could finish the last vowel sound.

“Hey! Easy with the merchandise kid.”Felicity said, holding Linda’s wrist and her device in both hands.

Linda glared at her.“Do not call me that.”

“Woah let’s all take a breath.Linda,” Alex prompted, using her hand to turn the blonde’s head towards her.“she’s just trying to help you.She’s going to get that thing off of you and then we can get you better.”

The fire that burned in those brown eyes intensified, and it only served to highlight the blue bruises above her cheeks, the sallowness of her skin.

“I do not want her too.”

Alex squinted in confusion.“Don’t want her to take off the watch?Linda… that thing is hurting you.”

Linda shook her head, her jaw clenching, and Alex felt some of her own irritation flare within her.

Patience, she reminded herself.Someone had been telling Linda what to do for at least as long as Alex had known her, she wasn’t about to align herself with that ideology.Linda made her own choices….

Alex just needed to make her see that this was a dumb one.

“Linda, it’s ok to be scared but I promise you… if these people come for you, they’ll find me.”

“And me.”Felicity chimed in, Alex feeling slightly warmed at her friend’s anger on Linda’s behalf.

“See baby,” Alex stroked her thumb over one of Linda’s cheekbones, her voice soft and steady.“You have a whole team of people behind you.No one’s going to hurt you, I promise.”

Linda’s face turned dark, a miserable expression taking over her face.She raised her free hand to hold Alex’s on her face.“If you let her take it off, then you _are_ hurting me.”

Alex balked, a stuttered denial leaving her mouth.

“I do not want this.”Linda said each word carefully and Alex’s mouth clicked shut.Her girlfriend looked exhausted… and sad.Morose.“Please make her stop.”

Alex swallowed, wanting to fight her on this.Wanting to argue and scream against the unfairness of it—the stupidity.But she didn’t.

Linda’s choice.

“It’s fine Felicity…Do what she wants.”

Linda’s face cleared, relief flooding her as she sagged against Alex’s shoulder again.Alex kissed her forehead, pulling her closer as she tried to think of another way to help her.

She was so sick of letting people down.

Felicity looked between them warily before carefully releasing Linda’s hand and going back to her monitor.She tapped silently for a few moments before turning back towards them abruptly.

“What if I don’t shut it down?”

Linda blinked, her head lifting slightly from where she’d rested it on Alex’s shoulder.

“What?”Alex asked.

“What if I just… reverse whatever its doing.It’s injecting you with something right?”

Linda reluctantly nodded, scared eyes passing between Alex and Felicity.

“Ok, so what if I plant something that falsifies the data.”Felicity looked excited, her hands moving in wild patterns as she explained her theory.Alex loved it when she got like this.This meant that whatever issue she’d had would now be solved.“When people build this sort of tech they need to measure input/output.So, it’s probably taking health readings as well.I’m already in their network, and trust me Linda, they don’t see me.They _won’t_ see me.All I need to do is create a dummy image of your stats and their current output of whatever the hell that is and then bam, I’ll set up a local copy and reverse the affects.They’ll think their device is working and _you_ will be the new owner of a simple bleeping watch.”

“Don’t say bleeping.”Alex said automatically, her mind racing with the implications.This could work.Felicity had her confident face… this _would_ work.

She looked over at Linda, the blonde now fully upright as she took in Felicity.Linda was gnawing her lower lip, and the look she had on her face was heart wrenching.

Alex had never seen someone so _hopeful_ before.Or scared.

“You… you can do that?You think—they wouldn’t be able to see?”

Felicity reached over and set her hand on top of Linda’s on the stool.“They won’t see a thing.I’m really good at what I do Linda, I wouldn’t offer this if I wasn’t absolutely sure it would work.”

Linda’s lips trembled, and she turned to Alex, that same look on her face.Linda’s brown eyes wavered, the hard almost inky blackness giving way to a softer chocolate.“If it were Jon…” she paused, wetting her lips before trying again. “If Jon’s life depended on this working would you do this?”

Alex’s chest hurt, her throat clogging with emotion and her eyes starting to burn.She blinked rapidly, letting out a shaky exhale and allowing her forehead to rest against Linda’s.

“I trust Felicity with my life—with _Jon’s_ life.If she says she can do it, then I believe her.”Alex pulled back, looking into her girl’s eyes and burying her fingers in long blonde locks.“I trust her with _your_ life too.You—you’re important to me.I care about you… so much.I wouldn’t have called her over if I didn’t think she could help.She’s good Linda.This will work.”

There was a long pause, Linda searching Alex’s face for something… some form of reassurance probably.Alex tried to give it to her.Eventually Linda nodded, the movement tepid but firm.

It was enough for Felicity who, after receiving the ok, immediately turned back to her screens.

Alex took another route, intent on distracting Linda from the dire situation attached to her wrist, her own insecurities be damned.The agent leaned in, nosing gently against Linda’s cheek and cradling her girl’s chin in her palm.She placed gentle kisses from Linda’s ear to her mouth, sealing their lips together in teasing little pecks.Linda exhaled shakily, her eyes diminished to mere slits as Alex continued her ministrations.

And then Linda was flinching back, eyes wide with shock and her body no longer trembling.Alex zoomed in on Felicity, the IT genius sitting casually in her chair as she took them in.

There was a beat of silence where they all looked at each other— Alex in concern, Linda in shock, and Felicity with amusement— and then Felicity started humming the wedding march.

Because of course. 

Alex totally needed that right now.

“Jackass.”

Felicity smirked.

“You did it?”Linda’s scared voice pulled Alex out of her impromptu staring contest.“They can’t—you did it?”

Her best friend softened, taking Linda’s hand again and stroking her thumb over the bandaged knuckles.

“Yes Linda.Your watch is now just that.There might be trace amounts that get through every now and then but the worst of it should be gone.And, if you ever get ‘called in’… I added a failsafe, it will piggy back off of their server when the locking mechanism is activated and reimage itself with their programming again.”

“Wait—you did _what?”_

Felicity ignored Alex’s angry outburst, keeping her eyes on Linda’s face.“I know what it’s like to be afraid Linda so I’m not going to tell you that you don’t have to be.But I do want you to know that we’re here for you.Whatever you need ok?”

A small smile slowly formed on Linda’s lips and Alex forced herself to remain silent.She could talk to Felicity about her ‘failsafe’ later.

“Thank you.I don’t— _thank you_.”Linda’s voice was tremulous and slightly in awe, but she was smiling.That was enough for Alex.

“Oh, I’m not done yet.”Felicity leaned closer, her hand going to the back of Linda’s ear and tracing the implant.“I’d like to take a look at this too if that’s ok.Same rules apply, I won’t do anything that they can see or trace.Pinky swear.”

Linda had flinched slightly at the touch and her eyes were slightly accusing when she turned to look at Alex, but she nodded her assent.Felicity gave her a small smile and set up her equipment, the hand contraption turning into a helmet like hat.

Alex hadn’t told Felicity about the implant, but she also was not shocked that her friend knew about the device.Felicity had a knack for being aware of all things technology at all times.It was weird and freaky, and Alex was not a fan.

Except for that one time in Fiji when they—

Nope. 

Not going there.

That had been _too_ much fun and the temptation to do it again... she shivered.Best to leave such things in the past.Besides Oliver had been so whiny during the whole thing; Felicity being in the field in any way shape or form really turned him into a jackass.

Although, with her current situation Alex was sincerely tempted to dangle Felicity in front of the big oaf like a carrot so that he could help her _annihilate_ whoever had done this to Linda.Clark was too much of a boy scout; his whole not killing spiel was great on a normal day, but for this…

For this Alex wanted them to pay.

She wanted to see bodies.

Lots of them.

Alex ran her hand slowly over Linda’s back, the soft cotton of her hoodie—Alex’s hoodie—tickling her palms and distracting Alex from the homicidal thoughts currently in her head.

She’d had some time to think about this now, catalogue everything she had seen and heard. Those were electrical burns on Linda’s hands.And the markings on her neck and arms were from being tied down with something.

The image had already been built in Alex’s mind.Linda strapped down while someone sent high voltages of electricity through her body—probably using her hands as the entry point.A metal cylinder strapped to either appendage would do the trick. 

The burns wouldn’t have taken long to develop either but given the state of Linda’s voice and her internal injuries, Alex was inclined to believe that it hadn’t been a quick session.They’d probably waited for her to heal between sittings.Alex hadn’t heard from her since Sunday night, it was now Wednesday, which gave them an almost 48-hour window in which to conduct their assault.

How long had she been here?How long had she been in her apartment, helpless and alone while Alex was happy and relieved with her pseudo family?

“Stop.”Linda whispered, nuzzling against Alex’s chin and sinking back into her arms.The metal and wires on the device cut into Alex’s skin and she welcomed the small punishment.“I know what you’re doing, and I want you to stop.You didn’t do anything wrong.You can’t control everything Alex.”

Alex scoffed, trying to calm her raging heart.“I should have been here.”

“You were where you needed to be.Jon needed you.”

“He had his parents. _You_ needed me.”

A soft gust of air tickled Alex’s throat and she shivered as Linda breathed her next words into her neck.“I wanted you.I always want you.But you weren’t necessary in this instance.Jon’s a child, he wouldn’t have understood you leaving him after all that.I’m an adult Alex, I can take care of myself.”

Alex pulled her closer, eyes on Felicity’s screens as she started plotting her revenge.“You shouldn’t have to.”

Felicity made an annoyed sound and ended their brief conversation.“Stop thinking about bad things please.I need…. Happy thoughts.What did you want to be as a kid?”

Linda blinked, sitting up again and trading a wary look with Alex.“I don’t know.I don’t remember.Why?”

“Seriously?”Felicity’s eyes briefly left her monitor in skepticism.“Whatever it was we won’t laugh.I wanted to be an astronaut vet.”Alex and Linda exchanged a bemused glance, one Felicity rolled her eyes at.“They’re tracking your emotions so I need you to be happy so they don’t pay as much attention.Hence, astronaut vet.”

Alex rolled her lips and fought the laugh that wanted to come out.“I’m sorry a what?”

“Well they were sending animals into space, so I wanted to be the person that treated the space animals… in space.”

Slowly nodding, Alex squinted her eyes at her best friend wondering briefly at her sanity.“Right.”

Felicity flipped her off.

“That sounds like it would have been fun if such an occupation had existed but truly, I don’t know.I don’t remember.”

Linda offered up a half shrug, and Felicity frowned at her screens.“I need something happy.Something that is pure joy, no sad feelings attached to it.The implant is somehow attached in your neural network, kind of like a web.It’s actually really good work… Not that I’m condoning this!”Felicity corrected, sending an alarmed glance back to Linda who merely smiled at her and nodded. 

“It’s ok.I was desi—” she flinched violently, a whine escaping her throat, hands palming her forehead.

Alex held her, alarmed eyes turning to Felicity who was tapping rapidly at the keyboard.

“Happy thoughts Danvers.Think of something!”

“I—” Alex sputtered, rapidly going through their time together and trying to think of what made Linda happy.“Do you remember Christmas morning?”

Linda pressed her forehead into Alex’s shoulder, giving no other sign that she had heard her.

“You were so beautiful.”Alex continued.“I thought you were the most beautiful being that I had ever seen in my life.And then you smiled at me and… god my heart just kind of stopped you know?Then I kissed you… it was quick, soft… but I couldn’t stop. I felt… I was really happy that morning Linda.”

Her face feels hot after the confession, her age-old anxiety that awoke whenever she spoke about _anything_ personal coming forth with a vengeance.Felicity had asked her for a happy thought and she had immediately thought of sex?

What kind of fucking dude bro was she?

She felt her hands tremble and cursed internally, already moving to stuff them in her pockets, but Linda caught one in between both of her bandaged hands.Her girlfriend pulled the hand to her mouth, brushing kisses to Alex’s knuckles with closed eyes.

“Me too.I was really happy too.”And just like that, Alex felt warm again.Linda had a real knack for making that happen… Alex was going to _murder_ these assholes.

“Keep going.”Felicity muttered.“If I’m going to get what I need, I’ll need more time.”

Alex wanted to ask _why_ but she didn’t want to risk causing Linda any pain.She’d seen enough of that for one day and, if distracting Linda from thinking about her circumstances kept her safe, Alex would do it.Even if it made her uncomfortable.

“Would you like to go on a date with me?”She asked, voice slightly breathless with anxiety.Who knew asking her _girlfriend_ out would cause such trepidation?

Linda’s brow furrowed, and she pulled her head back to face Alex fully.“Always.Where do you want to go?”

“Winn got us tickets to see Hamilton.”Alex told her, allowing her hand to rub soothing patterns into Linda’s shoulder and arm.“Apparently we need to work on our communication Miss Loves Musicals.”

“You told me you hated musicals.”Linda argued, crinkling her nose up at Alex.“Why would I bore you with something you don’t like?”

“I don’t hate _all_ musicals.I said I didn’t like _cheesy_ musicals.Hamilton will be fun.Besides,” She continued, glancing surreptitiously at Felicity to check her progress.“We’re allowed to dislike things that the other loves.That gives us context and depth or whatever.”

Linda smiled at her, a small twitch at her lips cueing Alex into her continued discomfort, however slight it may have been.

“You have such a way with words Just Alex.I’d love to see Hamilton with you.”

Alex hummed, bringing her hand up to massage the back of Linda’s neck.Felicity still wasn’t done, and she needed more material for this conversation.

She had nothin.

“What musicals do you like?”Felicity asked, when the silence went on too long.“What’s your favorite?”

Linda inhaled noisily, face pinched and pressing to Alex’s shoulder.“I really like the Sound of Music—anything Julie Andrews really. But Winn and I went to that showing and they did “Annie Get Your Gun”; there was a really beautiful song in there.”

“See, I can get behind a musical with a gun.” Alex teased making Linda laugh and her eyes sparkle.

“Annie Get Your Gun… I haven’t seen that one.Could you sing it for us?The song?”Felicity asked, although her attention remained glued to her computer, an almost angry look on her face.

“Oh.”Linda blushed, ducking her head and biting her lip.“I’m not very good…”

Felicity shot her a quick smile.“That’s ok, none of us are.This is a no judgement zone.Besides, I’m pretty sure Alex is going to think you’re a songbird even if you sound like a dying pigeon.”

“Hey!”Alex’s face flamed, though she was unsure if she was angry or embarrassed and on whose behalf.

Linda laughed again, sitting up more and giving Alex an adoring look.“Ok…”

Alex kissed her, wanting to rid her of that uncertainty.“She’s probably right.”She whispered.“I am kind of biased when it comes to you.”

A beautiful smile was her reward and Alex was almost able to forget why they were actually here.

“ _They say that falling in love is wonderful.It’s wonderful, so they say_.”Linda started, her voice soft and melodic.Winn had done her a disservice Alex thought.‘Killer voice’ was hardly an adequate description for Linda’s singing talent.Her girl was amazing.“ _And with the moon up above, it’s wonderful.It’s wonderful.So they tell me.I can’t recall who said it; I know I never read it.I only know they tell me that love is grand_.”Alex forgot all about Felicity being in the room, mesmerized by clear coffee colored eyes, the light glinting in such a way that the dark brown was almost a dusty cinnamon.Alex loved her eyes… but there was something… the brief distraction was overridden by Linda’s ending of the song, and thus Alex’s trance.“ _And…The thing that’s known as romance is wonderful.Wonderful.In every way; so they say._ ”

“Wow.”She breathed, eyes still locked on Linda’s and mind straying towards decidedly domesticated thoughts… like marriage and a dog… a big house, something with lots of sun and an art room… room for a little blonde girl to run around.

“I second that wow.”Alex closed her eyes, abruptly pulled from her daydream and remembering now that her best friend was watching their every move.“I’m now in love with you.Achievement unlocked.”

Linda blushed, her cheeks a rosy red, and eyes crinkling adorably as she hunched in on herself in embarrassment.

“Another good thing to come out of this: I downloaded the entirety of the code they used for that implant.”Felicity continued, probably taking pity on the girl and also removing the device from her head.“I can’t do anything right now, it’s way too complex and I don’t want to alert them or hurt you… but I have the framework and I’m going to work on restructuring it, so I can cut off the connection.”

Alex sat forward, bracing one hand on her knee, the other still stroking at the back of Linda’s neck.“You can do that?They won’t have anything on her after that?”

“Well, from what I was able to see they go off her brain functionality.It notices certain emotions and then pulls data from key words she would say.For example, if I gave you one of these and ordered… no more like _programmed_ you not to say the word cheese and you did, it would send a shock of pain to your system.And I would be notified that you went against your programming, allegedly so I could fix the breach.Now, that trigger is a simple one but there are all sorts of things—actions maybe that I wouldn’t want you to commit, but how do you control that?Well, if you were angry per se and I had programmed a ‘do not kill’ clause into that chip, it would activate at the first sign of anger in your cortex.From there it would monitor your speech patterns, hormones, emotions— all of it.No stone left unturned.They look like they have an algorithm that detects physical impacts based on this activation.”Felicity paused for a moment, refocusing her attention on Linda and giving her a small smile.“Hence the reason for the watch.They can’t hurt you without it right?”

Linda didn’t answer her question.Instead the blonde leaned forward like Alex, grabbing Felicity’s hands in her own.

“Would you be able to help others?If—I could give you whatever you want.I could—Could you get this out of someone else’s head?”

Felicity frowned, considering.“Every brain is different and I’m pretty sure they’d have to alter the algorithm to suit different individuals.BUT,” she ducked her head, trying to maintain eye contact as Linda turned from her.“But, every program that is designed alike… they all have a core that is similar or the same.If I can crack that, then I should be able to help anyone under these bastards’ control.”

Linda’s eyes filled with tears, and she jerked up into a standing position, swaying slightly at the abrupt movement.Shocked, it took Alex a second to follow after her as the blonde grabbed the sketch book Winn had given her from the counter.From the binding of the journal she tore the material back and allowed something small to drop into her hand.

She turned back to Felicity, offering the object to her.

A USB.

“That’s everything I’ve been able to gather on… and a way out.Maybe… I couldn’t get it to work.I was hoping…” She bit her lip, glancing aside at Alex who wrapped an arm around her waist in solidarity.“I know this is a lot to ask…Just name your price and I’ll pay it.”

“No price.”Felicity stated, rising from her chair, and accepting the proffered thumb drive.“Alex told me how many times you’ve saved her ass.She’s my family; if you saved her that’s a debt I can never repay.This is the least I can do.I’ll look this over, brainstorm with Alex and we’ll come up with something.”

Linda looked shell shocked, confusion swimming on her features at the simplistic way Felicity had dismissed her offer of payment.

Alex smiled at her friend, that stupid warm feeling that had been interrupting her life making yet another appearance.“I’ll help however I can.”She kissed Linda’s temple in comfort.“I may not be a computer genius, but I _do_ have a lot of resources and I’m pretty handy in a crisis.”

It was true, she did.She had the entirety of the resources of the DEO at her disposal and she would use it all if it meant helping Linda.Whether or not _Alex_ would be enough to help her was something she didn’t really want to deal with at the moment.Linda needed her, her self confidence issues could wait for another day.

“Plus,” Felicity said sardonically, “there’s the whole leading bioengineer specializing in alien species thing.I mean no big deal or anything…”

Alex rolled her eyes and shook her head, Linda eyeing her in awe and then affectionate frustration when she saw that Alex herself wasn’t impressed.

Linda exhaled noisily, half laugh half reprimand.“It’s encrypted.I haven’t had the time to work on it… I keep having to … start over. But it’s what I have—”

“Hey.”Alex interrupted, turning the blonde in her arms and cupping her cheeks between her palms.“We’ve got this.You’re not alone in this anymore ok?We’re not leaving you alone.”

There was a choked sob, and then Alex was pulling the crying woman into her arms, Felicity’s hand landing on Linda’s shoulder in comfort and support.

It was a lot.Alex couldn’t even begin to imagine how long she’d held this all in; how long she’d been searching for a way out… how long she’d been alone.She tightened her arms.Linda wasn’t alone anymore.Their rag tag group of friends were her family now.She’d never be alone again.

They stood like that until Linda had calmed down.

Or at least calmed down enough to push away and sheepishly admit that she “had to pee.”

Alex smiled and let her go.“A shower will help too if you can stand it.I’ll rewrap your hands after, but I’m worried about infection.”

Linda nodded and walked off into the apartment.

Alex and Felicity both spoke as soon as she was out of sight.

“There’s a kid—”

“I need you to track these fuckers down.”Felicity blinked at the vehemence in Alex’s voice but the rage that Alex had tried to contain while Linda was present was now bubbling over.“I need you to find them so that I can kill them.Get the Sirens, they’re always down to spill blood.”

“Alex—”

“No.No, Felicity.”Alex felt completely unhinged, her fists clenching so hard that her nails pricked the skin of her palm.“I don’t care about fucking morals or any of that shit!I am going to _kill_ them do you understand?I am going to fucking kill all of them!All I need from you is to get me a fucking address so I can blow those motherfuckers off the face of the planet!”

“Alex—”

Alex slammed her fist down on the table, causing Felicity to flinch at the display of emotions.“Who the fuck does something like that to someone?Are you fucking—have you _seen_ her?”

“Yeah—”

“Have you?Because I don’t see someone who deserves that kind of pain do you?”

“No—”

“Exactly!Fucking—she’s—you need to find them—”

“Ok—”

“I’m serious Felicity—”

“ _Ok_ —”

“By the end of the week.I need names and an address by the end of the fucking week.”Alex’s chest pounded, her veins throbbing with her anger as she jabbed her finger at Felicity.She sucked in a greedy breath of air, her own oxygen supply being spent trying to breathe through the internal vortex coursing through her.

“There’s a kid.”Felicity said, as soon as the agent had stopped talking and throwing Alex completely off balance.

“What?”The breath she had regained disappearing in a heavy gust.

“I’m not saying it’s hers and I’m not saying it’s not.But there’s a kid involved in all of this.”When Alex continued to look flabbergasted, she continued with an annoyed tone.“ _Think_ Alex.She asked you about _Jon._ She could have compared anyone else—your mother!She could have asked if you’d do it for Eliza but she singled Jon out.And that look she gave me at the end there?She’s _desperate._ And not for herself.”

Alex shook her head, her brain feeling fuzzy with all the information that had been forced into it.Rage, guilt, and confusion creating a potent cocktail that left her feeling dizzy and displaced.

“You could just be reaching here Felicity.She’s never mentioned anyone—”

“Did you not hear what I just said?She’s been _programmed_ not to say certain things—do certain things.Even if she wanted to tell you, there’s a very good chance that she _can’t.”_ Felicity sighed, concerned eyes darting to the bathroom where Alex could hear the shower water.“I’m a mother now Alex, I know that look.I’ve _given_ that look. There’s a kid.Whatever we do with this, we have to be careful.”

Hands shaking again, Alex frowned and nodded in understanding.It wouldn’t change anything for her emotionally if Linda did have a kid.But she was uncertain where their future could go from that point.Alex wasn’t made to be a parent.She was the world’s worst role model.Would Linda even want her around a kid— _her_ kid— once she’d been reunited with the child?

“What’s your plan here?”Felicity pulled her from her thoughts again, once more scattering Alex’s mind to the wind.

“What?”

“Your plan.You always have some sort of plan Alex.They’re usually extremely overly complicated but they work.What’s our play here?”

Alex frowned, tugging her hand through her hair as she tried to filter all the information that had been coming at her in the last 48 hours.“I don’t know.”

“You don’t know?”

“That’s what I said!”Alex snapped, shoving her hands in her pockets.

“Ok,” Felicity said dubiously, “what about when you find Kara, what’s your plan for that?”

“What?I… I don’t know?We find her and set her up with an identity if she doesn’t have one… find her a job, some help… I—what are you trying to ask me?”

Felicity sighed, her blonde curls moving as she shook her head.“I’m trying to get you to think past the next few days Alex.Seeing you with this girl, with Linda… Alex this is actually real.This isn’t just you fucking around.”

Alex was pacing now, her head throbbing as the headache she’d been fighting came on suddenly and without pause.“I know that!”

“Then what are you _doing?”_ Felicity insisted, reaching out and grabbing Alex so she was forced to stand still and look at her.“Alex… you are so incredibly intelligent… but in this?Honey, you still love Kara.”

“I _know_ that!”She did not see the point Felicity was trying to make here.Of course she loved Kara.She’d never stopped loving Kara.She couldn’t imagine a day where those feelings _didn’t_ exist.Why point out the—

“But you’re also in love with Linda.”Felicity’s voice was soft, her eyes gentle as if she were trying very hard not to freak Alex out.

Alex said nothing, her brain having short circuited when Felicity said Linda’s name.

Shit.

“When you find Kara… honey, you need to consider what’s going to happen.This isn’t just a pipe dream anymore.You have a solid lead in Jeremiah.And if Kara is alive, she’s going to need help.The kind of help that puts strains on budding relationships.”Guilt landed heavily in Alex’s gut, and she felt her fingers tremble as Felicity continued.“I’m saying that you might need to start thinking about the… choices your going to face when this happens.Because it is a when now Alex.And I don’t want to see you getting hurt.”

Alex pulled away from her, shoving her shaking hands in her armpits.“I’m done talking about this.”

She’d forgotten.Forgotten that Kara had been her priority… but with everything Linda had done for her—with everything Linda _meant_ to her… she couldn’t just leave her high and dry.

She wouldn’t.

She didn’t know about any choices she’d have to make but she would have to cross that bridge when she came to it.

Kara was still just a pipedream.No matter what Felicity said; Alex had been looking for years and had been disappointed at many a “sure thing”.She wasn’t about to set herself for failure like that again.

Linda was here and she was real and she was amazing and… and Alex wanted _her._ She _wanted_ Linda.Alex would focus on what she _had._ She’d be honest, but… she didn’t want to lose anyone.

She didn’t want to hurt anyone.

“Ok.”Felicity allowed, chewing her lip before trying another approach.“I can stay here, if you wanted to go to your doctor’s appointment.”Felicity offered, resting a hand on Alex’s bicep, and studiously ignoring the shaky hands.

She’d long ago gotten used to Alex’s adamant denial that anything was wrong, and she hadn’t been around in the last few months to see that Alex was trying to adult.Denying things is how she had fallen so low in the first place.The prayer from AA came to her mind, ‘grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.’

She did need a session.She should go…

Alex was already shaking her head in denial.“I don’t wanna leave her.Not after all of this.”

“’All of this’ is still going to be here when you get back.We’ll be fine.”Felicity said sympathetically, face clouded with worry.

Feeling extremely tired, Alex ran a hand down her face.This was a lot.She felt vastly underprepared to deal with any of it.She was overwhelmed and tired and she really wanted—

“It’s ok.”Linda stood in the entryway to her bedroom, miraculously clothed and finished with her shower.“If you need to go, I understand.”

Linda was wearing a soft pair of lounge pants and a white v neck t-shirt.Her feet were bare, and her wet hair was dripping onto a towel she had spread across her shoulders.

Alex stared at her for a moment.Linda had been so brave today—so strong.Alex could only hope to be so strong.“I _need_ to be with you.You need me.”She chewed her cheek. _Courage, dear heart_.“I have a doctor’s appointment with my therapist in a half hour… Did you maybe want to come with me?”

Linda smiled at her, the expression mirrored on Felicity’s proud face.

“I’d love to.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> #Growth.
> 
> I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter because it's the last "slow" one you're going to get. Chapter 17 starts our downwards spiral. I know I keep hinting at it but the next update... bring tissues.
> 
> But! We're in chapter 16 now so let's get into it.
> 
> Yes, Lillian Luthor is the scum of the earth and yes, Alex Daanvers is the world's apology for her.
> 
> Thank you world.
> 
> We got a teen Kalex flashback and we now know at least in part what happened to Kara. This scene was actually inspired by my favorite and for a long time only Supergirl comic arc, Many Happy Returns. This arc had a Kara from another dimension come to Midvale and then she got chased because they were trying to send her back to die and that world's Kara asked if she trusted her, Other Kara said with my life, and then This world Kara punched her out. There's ALOT more to that story but yeah, read it.
> 
> Cat being all concerned is definitely something I see happenining. And as a hardcore CEO, showing those emotions in anything but contempt would be career ending for her sooo... she's angry.
> 
> And right! Alex is growing but she's also pussy footing around. She needs to reclaim her excellence and be a badass agent again.
> 
> But also heal.
> 
> Healing is important.
> 
> I just see that Alex was attacked at the CatCo party and while she fought off the offenders, she didn't really go after the people responisble. She hasn't gone after the people at her apartment and she hasn't really truly tried to go after the people who are controlling Linda. 
> 
> Don't get me wrong some of this is good, it's showing that she's slowing down and taking stock. But she's a little stagnant right now imo and that is what Cat is commenting on. Old Alex would have wiped the floor with ALFA; she might have died doing it but it would have gotten done.
> 
> We need to combine Old Alex and New Alex like a Megazord and fight the evil Rita Repulsa!
> 
> Or not, whatever.
> 
> Originally I was going to have Winn try to help Linda, but unfortunately or fortunately, whatever... anyway, it felt more like something Felicity would be suited for more. What with the biotech her and Curtis are currently working on.
> 
> No digs at Winn, I love the bastard. I mean, he got them Hamilton tickets! Who wouldn't love that guy.
> 
> Then we got a tiny bit of Felicity and Kara bonding. Some of you actually asked for that... was it everything you imagined? Lol.
> 
> Clarification: Kara is no longer getting pumped full of Kryptonite but that doesn't mean she's free of CADMUS. She still has implant and they still have Kalasin. We're not free yet... but oh I can see the sun on the other side of this hill.
> 
> We also saw the 'Kara' conversation start. Alex didn't shut Felicity down when she brought it up, at least not right away and we got to see some of the conflict that might arise. Given that Linda and Kara are the same person, the conflict obviously won't last, but our poor dear Alex doesn't know that does she?
> 
> Anyway, what'd you guys think? Was the song too much? Alex's anger too tame? Did you want more revenge violence?
> 
> And question: How much violence is too much for you guys? Not saying I'm going to change anything but let's say for final battles, revenge, or anything of that nature if I boiled Lex Luthor alive would that be a turn off? Obviously I can't do that now but humor me.
> 
> Til next time,
> 
> ~Chronicles


	17. There Was a Time, I Knew a Girl of a Different Kind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hi Guys,
> 
> So not a lot happened last chapter, but this one is a bit of a doozy. Over 17k words! That's massive, and I would apologize but you crazy kids seem to think that kind of thing is cool, so whatever.
> 
> If I did my job right, then this will be a pretty difficult part to get through. I'm offering grief counseling in my comments section...
> 
> Anyway, not much else to say here so without further adieu...
> 
> Song: Don't You Worry Child- Nicole Cross version

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Recap:
> 
> Kara took too long to check into CADMUS so they punished her, severely. Alex found her a few days later, still hurt and hopped up on Kryptonite. Our lovely agent deduced that the source of Kara's pain seemed to be coming from her watch and called in some backup: Felicity.
> 
> Felicity got it all squared away and forced some romantic smooshing between our lovebirds. She saved Linda but, even though the liquid K is no longer an issue, the head implant is. How much of a problem remains to be seen. Felicity has bigger fish to fry since she now knows that there is a kid involved! Dun dun dun.
> 
> She forces Alex to slow down, to think and process, and it leads to Alex taking Linda (Kara) with her to therapy.
> 
> And that is where we pick up...

** There Was a Time, I Knew a Girl of a Different Kind **

 

“You can ask.” Alex whispered, her hands stroking up and down Linda’s spine where the blonde lay on top of her.It was the morning after Felicity had come over to help her take care of Linda and Alex was still exhausted.

After her meeting with Dr. McKay, the two had stumbled back to the apartment and promptly fell asleep.It had been the oddest therapy session Alex had had to date.

She hadn’t wanted to leave Linda alone, but she also hadn’t wanted to relive any of her past traumas with Linda present.As strong as she felt their relationship was, Alex simply wasn’t ready to show all of her skeletons.She hoped she would be someday, but right now it was unimaginable.

Instead, Dr. McKay had taken one look at the two of them and handed out coloring books.They had colored for an hour with McKay keeping up a solid conversation about favorite books and movies.They’d colored, talked, and made jokes.Linda had _laughed._ And her girl’s hands hadn’t once strayed to fidget nervously with her glasses.

Alex had decided that she quite liked the good doctor.

Especially when Linda had haltingly asked about what Dr. McKay actually did.What had followed was a long conversation about the ins and outs of psychology and how mental health affects _everyone_ the same way common colds do.

McKay had given Linda her card and told her if she had any more questions to just shoot her an email.

Alex had scheduled her next appointment with a lot more ease than she had before.

When they’d woken up that morning, Alex had ordered them takeout.A lot of it.Pancakes, waffles, eggs, bacon (for her), muffins, and home fries.

Then she’d pulled Linda into a bath and had held her girl in the soothing heat of the water, kissing her wherever she could reach.Linda had curled into her like a kitten, her hands banding around Alex’s bicep and tracing circles in the skin there.They were both excused from work that day.

Hank was still under the impression that she was caring for Jon and Alex had texted Cat as soon as she had found Linda.She hadn’t given the CEO any real details, but she had told her it was bad and that she thought Linda would need another day to recuperate.

Cat had been strangely ok with that and had even insisted on periodic updates.Privately of course.

Winn had been besides himself with worry and only a quick call from Linda had been enough to stop him breaking down her door.

The blonde’s voice had long since healed and so Winn probably suspected they were back to ‘sexy times’ rather than anything nefarious.He had also probably hacked Alex’s phone and read her texts.She’d kill him when she saw him.

Now, the couple was lying on Linda’s couch, the sun streaming in from the windows behind them and their demolished breakfast on the coffee table in front of them.The TV was set on low and was playing some obscure cartoon on Nickelodeon.

Linda paused in dragging her fingers along Alex’s ribs, her head popping up from where she’d had it on Alex’s chest, face set in puzzlement.

“About my job.”Alex clarified.“After going to HQ yesterday, I’m pretty sure you know I’m not FBI anymore.”

Linda smiled, and resumed her ministrations, ear once again pressing to Alex’s heart.“I knew you weren’t FBI Agent Danvers.The FBI works with a team; like in Miss Congeniality.All you have is Winn.”

Alex flinched, shock coursing through her at Linda’s confession.“Winn?What?No—he—Winn’s in IT…”

“It’s ok.”Linda interrupted.“I would never ask you to divulge the secrets of your job.Not when I can’t be completely honest with you either.And I won’t say anything, I promise.”

“Ok…”

Unsettled, Alex kissed the top of Linda’s head.She wasn’t used to being outsmarted so to speak… she found the trait attractive on Linda though.From that first conversation at the bar, Linda had been surprising her.

“So, Felicity sent me some of the stuff on that data drive.The project you were working on, the dimensional fold?That’s really advanced material.”Alex waited for a response, but when none was forthcoming she continued.“It’s possible too.Especially with all of the work you’ve already done.Felicity has a friend named Ray Palmer, and another one named Cisco Ramon.Between the four of us, we’ll be able to get it working for you.It’ll be a whole new world.”

Linda made a noise, her head popping up again.“Not really.It will be this world just… on another layer?We’ll still be on earth, just… away.”

Alex raised her hand, her fingers brushing lightly over the implant.“Away from any signals that might control you?”

Linda nodded, folding her hands over Alex’s chest and resting her chin on them.“Have you ever heard of the Suicide Squad?”

Alex frowned at the seemingly abrupt topic change, moving one finger to push a strand of hair behind Linda’s ear.“Yeah.Amanda Waller is a sick fuck of a genius but she’s effective.Fortunately, they had to disband the project when someone leaked the info.There was a public outcry about human rights and inhumane treatment of prisoners.I was on the public’s side of this one.Punishing someone for a wrongdoing: fine.But putting a bomb in their head—wait...”

Linda smiled sadly, shrugging her shoulders.“It wasn’t disbanded.Amanda Waller just… made some new friends.”

“Shit.”

“The dimensional fold would help people like me.We’re not criminals.We just want a fair shot.”

Alex nodded and Linda gave her a quick kiss before laying down on her once more.

Staring at the ceiling the agent tried to piece together her thoughts.There was a literal bomb in her girlfriend’s head.In apparently a lot of refugee alien’s heads…

She inhaled slowly to quell the inferno that had lived under her skin since she found Linda bloody and beaten.It was a difficult thing and Alex may be an asshole, but she was mature enough to realize that soothing her rage right now would only be serving her.It would be selfish.

She was done being selfish.Linda needed her, so she’d stay.

But when Felicity found those pieces of shit, Alex was going to make John Wick look like a boy scout.

Allowing the thought to calm her she brought her mind back to the topic at hand.

A dimensional fold would allow them to get away from their captors, out of reach of whatever signal they would be employing to kill them.

It would also take Linda away from Alex.

“Do you… I mean, did you plan on taking anyone else with you?”

The blonde banded her arms tightly around Alex, her nose digging into Alex’s left breast.“I wanted to ask you… but I know you have a life here.Plus, I was still about four years from completing it.It was still only a dream.”

Alex hummed, her fingers moving from Linda’s spine to her biceps.“It’s not anymore.I’m pretty sure we can have a working prototype by the end of the month.Maybe have it actually sorted a few weeks after that.Maybe a 3-month time line give or take, barring any major catastrophes.”

Linda shot up, her upper body braced on her arms as she stared down at Alex with a devastatingly hopeful expression.“Really?”

“Mmhm.”Alex said, rising up to meet the woman and tugging her into a kiss.“This is important to you.I’m going to do everything I can to make it happen.”

“Thank you.”Linda sniffled back, burying her face in Alex’s neck.

“You’re very welcome.”Alex held her close, the feel of the woman’s body ingrained in her now.“Linda… I would be honored to go with you, but… I have some things I need to do here.”

“It’s ok.I understand.”From the sound of her voice Alex could tell that she really did.She was holding an honest to god living miracle in her arms.There was no other explanation for this woman’s perfection.

They lay in silence for several moments, Linda’s attention eventually drifting back to the TV.

Alex waited for the inevitable surge of annoyance that usually came when someone touched her for prolonged periods of time, forcing her own body to heat up and become sticky with sweat, but nothing happened.The claustrophobic feeling oddly absent and solidifying something in Alex’s being.

…

She liked it when Linda touched her.

There was always a sense of calm that engulfed her and made her want nothing more but to hold her girl tight and never let go.She hadn't felt like this in years.

She pressed a kiss to Linda's hair, hands curling around her and fingers drawing random patterns into the skin at her lower back.There was an air of calm around them, a sort of serenity.Linda was in more of Alex’s clothes, a kind of ironic turnabout since Alex was the one living out of a backpack at the moment.

Seeing the other woman in her old MIT t-shirt though…

She sighed, nosing along Linda’s hair and allowing her fingers to reach higher, pushing the shirt up further as she went.Linda was so soft.

She’d invited Alex into her world, had made the attempt to tie their lives together, and Alex had turned her down.

Alex inhaled, the clean florally smell of Linda’s soap invading her senses.Courage and all that.

“I found an alien.”She stopped and winced at her words, abrupt and blunt as they were and she licked her lips as she backtracked slightly.“Sorry, that was… When I was younger, I found an alien.Or rather, I guess she found me to be honest.I lost her when I was sixteen.That’s why I’m so obsessed with aliens, I’ve been trying to find her.I promised her I would find her.I can’t go anywhere until I fulfill that promise.”

And yeah ok, that could have gone better.She sounded like such a tool, and she made Kara sound like a puppy.Which, ok, she had been sort of but it didn’t fit within this context.

“What happened?”Linda’s voice was soft, clearly trying not to startle Alex or make her uncomfortable.

The agent shrugged, a rueful smile touching her lips as old memories came to her.“She hit me over the head and stuffed me under a tree.To protect me.She—I… they took her from me and she went with them to keep me safe.To keep my family safe.I can’t just leave her.If there’s even a small chance that she’s alive…”

“Who was she?” Linda asked after the silence had stretched a bit too long, her blonde head popping up and brown eyes peering at Alex curiously.

Alex swallowed.She hadn’t talked about Kara as a rule.There were way too many things she didn’t know; if Kara was in hiding, Alex didn’t want to reveal her.

And, if she wasn’t… if Kara was dead… she didn’t want to make it obvious that she was friend or foe as it would seriously mess with her plans of revenge if she was exposed to the wrong person.She had been walking a fine line for _years._

She was so tired.

She brought her hands up to Linda’s ribcage, tugging gently until the woman was face to face with her and then bringing her down for a soft kiss.Alex sighed into the kiss, that calm sensation sweeping through her and making her feel as safe as she ever had.Linda pressed kisses to the corners of her mouth, her eyelids, and then her nose making Alex giggle and poke at her sides.

Linda squealed at being tickled and Alex laughed, wrapping her arms around her girl’s waist and flipping them so that she was on top.

“She was my favorite person in the whole world.” She finally said, looking down at the bright face below her and brushing unruly hair out of Linda’s eyes.“Until now.”

Alex’s heart thudded in her chest at the admission, even as Linda’s appearance visibly softened and the blonde reached up to kiss her properly.

Alex returned the kiss but her thoughts were awhirl with what she had just admitted.

Because it was true.She’d meant it.Her feelings for Linda were…

Shit.

“Alex?”Linda questioned, pulling back slightly to look at the woman on top of her.“Are you ok?”

“Uh.”Her chest hurt and she very suddenly found that she couldn’t breathe.“Yeah?I’m… uh…”

Linda’s hand pressed to her chest, right over Alex’s frantically beating heart.

“Your heart’s beating really fast.You’re borderline tachycardic, what happened?What’s wrong?”

Alex shook her head, pushing herself up to her knees and fumbling to a seated position.Linda followed her and rubbed soothing circles into her back as Alex dropped her head between her knees and focused on _breathing._ Shit.Shitty shit SHIT.

FUCK.

And cursing was not helping.

A glass of water was pressed into her closed hand and she gulped the liquid down gratefully, some clarity coming back to her mind with the sustenance.

Cordova St.

Flanning Ln.

Holdo Ave.

Shit.

The names of the streets she lived on slowly ebbed back into her mind and she exhaled slowly, hands still shaking as she became aware of Linda pressing small soft kisses to her temple.

“Better?”The blonde asked quietly, hands still running up and down Alex’s back.“Do you want more water?”

Alex nodded and swallowed hard, raising the refilled glass that Linda handed her to quivering lips.

“I love you.”She blurted, hands wrapped tight around the sweating glass in her grasp.She glanced up at Linda’s shocked face which quickly morphed to concern when Alex hit her forehead with her palm.“Ugh!Geez.I _love_ you.Fuck.I’m _in_ love with you.Like in—fuck.Shit.I—"

Linda grabbed her cheeks, turning her face and pressing their mouth together.Alex thought at first, she was trying to kiss her, and then realized the other woman was blowing cool air into her mouth.

Gross.

But it helped.The combination of shock and carbon dioxide doing much to pull her back from the brink.

She swallowed again.

“Breathe.” Linda murmured, thumbs stroking along Alex’s cheekbones.“Just breathe.Focus on that for a second.”

Alex nodded briefly but then shook her head again, standing now and running her hands through her hair in agitation.“You don’t understand.”She started, fisting her hands under her armpits.“I’ve never said that to anyone before.”

Linda blinked.

“Jon?”

Alex shook her head, lips pulling between her teeth as her anxiety increased.

“Your mom?”

Another head shake, and a rough exhale.

“Oh.”Linda blinked at her, and then she was standing in front of her and pulling her into her arms.“That’s ok.”Her hand sifted through the hair on the back of Alex’s head.“You don’t have to say it if you’re not comfortable with it yet.”

“I want to say it.”Alex insisted, feeling her body start to relax as Linda continued to play in her hair.“I mean it.”

She hadn’t told Kara how she’d felt; hadn’t said the words and then the Kryptonian had been gone.Stolen away and Alex had stuffed down every happy feeling she’d ever had.

“Oh.”Linda said again, arms tightening just so.Then she buried her face in Alex’s neck and pressed a soft kiss to her pulse point.“I love you too.”

Alex’s hands dropped from under her arms and she wrapped them tightly around the woman holding her.

As far as first “I love you” s went, that hadn’t been all that bad.

“Alex?”Linda questioned, nosing gently against Alex’s neck.“Not to ruin the mood but… I… asked around… about your dad…”

Alex hummed, unwilling to let the peace from the moment go.She just wanted to hold onto it for a little longer.

“There were some whispers… apparently that hit on your apartment… that was ordered by the organization he works for…”Alex froze and Linda pulled her head back, her face set in empathy.“I didn’t find out too much, just that his boss… or maybe a business partner?They were upset that you were interfering.I think whoever called you at CatCo is his employer.If you can trace that call maybe you can find him.I’ll keep asking—”

“No.”Alex surged forward, lips sealing against Linda’s. “No honey, you’ve done enough.It’s fine.I don’t want to put you in anymore danger than I already have.”

Linda frowned but allowed Alex to pull her back to the sofa to resume their previous positions.Alex ignored the look of concern, choosing instead to press Linda down into the cushions and nibble and suck a path from her neck to her lips.There was nothing Alex could do with the information she had just been given, not right now.And she and Linda had just said their first ‘I love you’s’, Alex wasn’t going to let her father ruin that moment.

But in order to reclaim the beauty of that moment she was going to have to distract her girlfriend with more kisses.The blonde whimpered, her hands clutching at Alex as the agent smirked.She loved doing this; pulling those sounds from her girl.

Alex pressed down with her hips, a gasp escaping her, Linda pulling her back into a deep kiss that left her breathless.

“I love you.”Alex muttered between kisses, her hand working its way underneath Linda’s shirt.

Linda moaned when Alex stroked over her nipple, her legs spreading easily to accept her girlfriend between her thighs.

“I love you too.”

~*~

Alex scrubbed her hands over her face, the slightly damp skin doing a little good in soothing her nerves.She’d just finished racking the last of the dishes from her and Linda’s breakfast that morning, her girlfriend having insisted that she was ok to go into work.Alex had told her she wanted to check in on Jon first and then she’d join her midday.

She planned on bringing a very large food offering with her for Linda’s lunch.Even though the blonde looked better than she had and said she was no longer in pain, she still looked exhausted; her face still slightly sunken.

At least it would lend to the lie that she had been sick.

Alex sighed shaking out her hands and moving to grab her stuff.She’d need to leave soon if she wanted to meet Linda on time; her girlfriend could still use some affection.

The saving grace had been in the tickets Winn had gifted them.With a free night and a desperate need to cheer Linda up, she’d taken the blonde to Hamilton the night before.Originally, she’d bribed Linda out of the house with frozen yogurt and food.Linda had had a bit more energy at that point and most of her injuries had healed over.

She’d been on the floor in front of her couch when Alex had approached her, her blonde head bent over a notebook that she was diligently writing in.It had taken Alex a moment to realize that the notebook in question was actually her own.

She’d scowled at the perceived invasion of privacy and tapped Linda’s bent knee with her socked toe.

_“Pretty sure there are laws against this kind of thing.Personal boundaries and all that.”_

_Linda had smiled, her hands still working effortlessly as she jotted down her thoughts.“Pretty sure that personal boundaries go out the window when your girlfriend picks your lock.”_

_Alex sputtered.“I did—I mean, yeah but—”_

_“It ruins the metal you know.A lot of people say that’s hogwash but it actually does mess up the internal mechanisms.”Linda glanced up at her, a knowing smile on her tired face._

_“Maybe for amateurs.”Alex had scoffed._

_“Of course.”Linda confirmed, finishing her last sentence with a swirl of her pen.“The same way you amateurly put my bloody sheets in my washing machine and got blood stains on my new pillowcases?”_

_Now Alex blushed.“Well I normally throw that stuff out but I didn’t want—I mean, your stuff is way nicer—” She huffed, wiping a hand down her face as Linda giggled and moved to a standing position.Alex caught her arm as she swayed slightly the teasing smile never leaving her lips.“I’m sorry.”_

_“It’s fine.”Linda assured, tangling their fingers together.“It was the thought that counted.I love that you feel the need to take care of me.”She leaned in, her forehead resting against the side of Alex’s face.“You make me feel so safe.”_

And so, Alex had lost the notebook fight and hadn’t even had a chance to yet read what Linda had written.She figured it was something super lovey dovey or some inspirational quote seeing as it was the notebook she had been using to jot down ideas for Jon’s treatment.Alex had used the moments where Linda was asleep to come up with different treatment plans and had started rewriting an old formula she had originally been working on with Kara.The Kryptonian had been trying to teach her how to reprogram cells to create regenerative technology.Alex was older and wiser now and science had evolved in the time since Kara had been taken…

Maybe she could get it working this time around.

Linda had been awake though, not asleep; and Jon was stable.Alex’s focus had returned fully to her girlfriend and the clear stress that had been etched into her face.

The blonde had been a bit more than subdued and so Alex had taken her on the extremely long walk through National City Central Park to the theater district.Linda’s eyes had lit up as soon as she had seen the sign for the show and Alex knew she had made the right decision.

Her girl hadn’t stopped smiling for the rest of the night and Alex had purchased them matching hoodies, and a mug and the soundtrack from the original cast for Linda.

Linda had tugged the hoodie on under her jacket and given Alex a solid kiss on the mouth.They’d gotten a few odd looks and Alex had seen some disgust on the people around them, but she hadn’t cared.Linda was happy and that was a win in her book.To round out the night, her girlfriend had purchased her flowers from a street vendor and gotten them a horse carriage ride around the city.

Alex had never been on such a venture, thinking it little more than a tourist trap.She was finding that things were worth a lot more with Linda by her side.

It made her wary of what was coming next; a reflex that Dr. McKay said came from her losing Kara.Apparently, she had abandonment issues or whatever and was afraid of getting close to people for fear of losing them.

Go figure.

Moving to grab her stuff, she picked up her phone and dialed Clark’s number.

“Hey.”She said when he answered.“Are you next to him?”

A moment later Jon came on the phone.

_“Alex!”_

“Hey Thumper.I wanted to check in on you, make sure you hadn’t grown an extra 5 legs in my absence.”She stuffed her keys in her pocket, grabbing her motorcycle helmet and a spare for Linda just in case before heading out.

_“Alex!I’m not that much of an alien.I only have an extra ear.”_

“That’s pretty gross kid.”

Jon laughed, clearly pleased with his own joke. _“I had a nose bleed this morning but it only lasted like twenty seconds.Like a flash flood.Mom said she thinks I cut my nose.”_

“Did your dad see a cut?”

_“No.”_ He said simply.“ _But he said he didn’t see anything else wrong either.We went to the fortress again and Kelex said I was fine.”_

Alex made a noncommittal sound as she entered the parking lot of Linda’s building, squinting slightly in the morning sun.“Well if your robot says your ok, I guess its true huh?

_“Yep!Are you coming over?”_

_“_ No, sorry.”Alex sighed, swinging a leg over her motorcycle.“I’m going to bring Linda some food and then I need to head to work.Did you need me to bring you something?”

_“No.I just miss you.”_ It made her frown to hear him sound so dejected.

Alex paused, her hands on the key in the ignition.“Hey, how about this weekend I come spend some time with you, huh?I’ll find some junk food to sneak past your parents and we’ll play video games all night.”

_“Really?”_

“Course, I’ll set something up with your mom and dad.”

_“Yes!This is going to be great, I promise.I can’t wait.”_

Smiling, Alex started her bike, feeling the smooth vibrations under her and kicking away her kickstand.“I’ll talk to you later Thumper.”

_“Ok, bye Alex!”_

Alex hesitated for only a second before calling out. “Jon?”

_“Yeah?”_ He asked, still clearly excited about their playdate.

“I— I love you.”

Jon laughed, _“I love you too silly.”_

And he hung up.

Kids made everything seem so simple.

~*~

Kara tried to keep her face clear as she entered Lena’s office.She was trying to catch up on the work she’d missed the past three days but everyone was treating her like she might break at any moment.It was odd and off putting.She wasn’t quite sure what to make of it.

She’d texted Alex, finally at ease enough to ask questions about the behaviors of humans, and the agent had quickly texted her back.Although, to be fair, her response had been less than helpful.

 

| Chala: Do you want me to beat them up? _9:34 a.m._

 

Kara had told her no, and that she missed her.Alex had sent her a kissy emoji and told her she’d pick up her favorite order from the Japanese restaurant by her apartment.

Smiling slightly at the memory, she took in Lena’s office, immaculately clean as always since the brilliant scientist was hardly ever in there. She preferred working on the floor; getting to know her employees’ needs first hand.

Opportunistically, Lena did happen to be in the large space today.She was fiddling with something in the corner, a small frown marring her face as she read through the data that the sphere in her hands was giving off.

“Hello Ms. Luthor, I picked up your packages from downstairs and the layouts from the Science and Technology Departments.”Kara carefully laid the large manila folders on Lena’s desk intent to escape as soon as possible.Happy as she was to see her friend she wasn’t too keen to interact with her.The last time they had been in the same room, Lena had been hissing about manners.

Her plans of escape were not to be as Lena’s head shot over to her, her eyes widening.She dropped the sphere on her workstation, uncaring of the rough treatment, and rounded the desk to meet Kara in the middle of the room.

Kara opened her mouth to give the excuses she and Alex had gone through that morning but found herself being squeezed quite tightly instead.

“Are you ok?How are you feeling?”Lena’s questions came in rapid fire, the brunette pushing Kara back and holding her at arm’s length as she checked her over.“Cat said you were ill but she didn’t say with what and she actually looked genuinely worried about you which only made me more worried but I didn’t want to bother you so I thought I’d distract myself with—”

“Lena!Lena!”Kara brought her hands up to clasp the forearms of her assailant.“Breathe.I’m ok.Just a bad case of food poisoning.I went to the doctor and everything.I’ll be fine.”

Lena’s eyes ran over her critically and for a moment Kara was afraid that maybe _she_ had x-ray vision too.Another family member who’d abandoned her.The memory of Alex’s friend still stinging in her chest.

But then Lena was sighing and pulling her back into a hug.“Sorry, I was just worried.You keep scaring me Linda!At this rate I’ll have grey hair before my thirtieth birthday.”

“Sorry.”Kara returned, her own arms squeezing Lena slightly.“I didn’t mean to worry you.This week or the night of the party.I just… I’m not used to having people around me who care.It’s a bit of a learning curve.”

Lena sighed, pulling away completely.“I can’t say I don’t relate.How are you settling in today?Did you get Cat’s email?”

Kara blanched and quickly dug for her phone.She’d had to get a new one… _again._ Except this time, she hadn’t had Winn to help with server names, ports, and failed authentication procedures and she hadn’t wanted to try hacking into CatCo while she was high on Kryptonite.As such, she found throughout her day that she was getting weird phone calls and apparently missed emails.

Cat had bluntly requested her presence nearly 10 minutes ago now and the CEO did not like waiting.Feeling actual tears come to her eyes at the thought of the dressing down she was about to receive Kara tried to internally steel herself.

“Hey.Don’t worry about it.I’ll go with you and tell Cat that I held you up unintentionally.She can’t do anything to _me._ ”

Kara had tried to deny the offer but Lena had been firm and had walked with her to Cat’s office.Ms. Grant was rattling off a list of things to Siobhan when they arrived, her coat on and bag in hand.

She gave an indifferent look to the pair before rolling her eyes.“With me Lidia.”

Lena frowned, following them on to the elevator after Kara had hurriedly grabbed her things.She had no idea if she was actually leaving the building—she hoped not since Alex was bringing her lunch—but she’d learned to prepare for anything when working under Cat Grant.

The elevator doors closed on them, Agent Jones staying firmly in front and alert.She’d given Kara a ring pop that morning and told her to keep a brave face.

“Cat,” Lena started.“I just wanted to apologize for keeping Linda so long.She told me she needed to get back to your office, but I lost track of time.It won’t happen again.”

Ms. Grant made a noise of disgust.“Seriously Lidia, this is the best you can do?Befriend rich people so that you have someone to hide behind?”

Lena frowned, moving slightly in front of Kara and cutting her off when she would have spoken.“That is hardly professional Cat.Do you always blame your employees for the mistakes of others?”

Cat looked past the irate woman to Kara, her eyes an icy green.“Will you ever stand up for yourself or do you expect people to do it for you for the rest of your life?”

Her words struck something deep inside and Kara blinked as her mind started racing.Next to her, Lena started chewing Cat out.Cat allowed her to, not interrupting as she listened to the tirade being launched against her. 

For years she’d been under Cadmus’ thumb—Lillian’s thumb.She’d done what they asked of her even before Kalasin.And she’d never once stood up for herself.

When she’d first landed in CADMUS she’d been all about rebellion and anger and fighting for her freedom, but now…

Now she was weak.

She’d _let_ them win.She’d gotten _tired_ and she’d let them win.

The elevator jolted, rocking dangerously and throwing the women inside of it around like ragdolls.All except Kara who stood in the middle of the chaos trying to listen to what had caused the movement.She’d just pinpointed another heartbeat when the elevator dropped dangerously, slamming against walls as it descended.The emergency brakes squealed and Kara thrust her hand through the elevator wall her fingers digging effortlessly into the stone and halting the compartment’s descent.

Then the lights cut out.

Her breath quickened without her consent, memories of pain and fear invading her senses and numbing her to everything else.

“Linda!Linda can you hear me?Cat her arm’s through the wall, I can’t get it out.”

“Don’t try!It might be caught on something.Just wait.”

The elevator groaned, the brakes finally able to take on the weight since the speed had slowed.

It didn’t matter much to Kara, all she saw in front of her was the vast emptiness of space; the crushing loneliness of Precon, the first step to her programming.

When she’d first gotten to CADMUS, they’d left her in the dark for almost 8 months at a time.

Precon cut that down to a mere thirty days in complete dark isolation.

Sensory deprivation.

“Linda, I need you to listen to me.I know this is scary, it’s ok to be afraid.But you have to breathe.”Someone’s nails dug into her palm.Ms. Grant?“Every time you feel me squeeze you can inhale, no squeeze no inhale got it?”

Got what?

She couldn’t see.

What?

Her heart thudded noisily in her ear, throbbing in her chest.

Ow.

She inhaled sharply at the mild pain, Cat’s nails digging into her palm unforgivingly.All she saw in front of her was darkness, her eyes refusing to work and allow her to _see_.It was so dark.She wanted Alex.She whined, trying to escape her demons as she tugged at her hand.

Gunshots and screams sounded above them and someone cursed, Kara inhaled again only vaguely hearing Cat tell her she was doing great.

_“Where are you?”_

Alex.

“Danvers this isn’t a social call.We’re stuck in my elevator and Linda is having a panic attack.I need you to talk her down.”

What?

She felt lightheaded.

Pain.

She couldn’t breathe.

Inhale.

Her chest hurt.

_“It’s ok baby.Don’t cry.You’re doing great.Hey, I need you to help me ok?I need you to help me figure out if you’re hurt or not.Can you wiggle your toes for me?”_

Alex.

She forced herself to focus, the roof of the compartment shaking slightly as debris from whatever battle was taking place upstairs fell on it.She could probably move her hand now.

Toes though…

Alex had asked her about her toes.

She wiggled them.

Cat exhaled loudly, her hand moving up to pet Kara’s hair.

_“Good baby, that’s so good.That means your feet are fine, can you flex your thighs for me?Tell me if it hurts?”_

Kara wanted to protest, she was fine.She couldn’t get hurt.Not like this.Felicity had turned off the Kryptonite in her watch.She was fine.

“That’s good Linda.”Cat’s hand rested on her knee, feeling the muscle tense under her palm.“It’s working Scully.”

_“I’m almost there, honey.How about your arms, can you make a muscle?”_

“What?”Her voice sounded faint to her own ears.

_“I want you to introduce Lena to your gun show.If she touches you tell me so I can kick her ass.”_

The chuckle surprised her, taking her off guard enough that she complied with the request, the elevator groaning again as she flexed the wrong hand and pulled the one that had been holding them up out of the wall.

Luckily the braking system was still working and they didn’t plummet to their deaths.

Lena let out a sigh of relief next to her.The battle from up above finally dying down.

At least that part was over.

~*~

Alex didn’t believe in coincidences.

When she’d arrived at CatCo, her first priority had been in seeking out her girlfriend.She’d hitched a ride from Clark, otherwise they wouldn’t have made it in near enough time.He took them down the elevator shaft, clothed as Superman, and had moved the elevator to an actual floor before pulling open the doors and letting out its inhabitants.

Linda had all but collapsed in her arms.

There had been a rage in Alex then, a fury she was almost unable to control but she’d stuffed it down in favor of holding Linda close.

Linda who had already been through so much.

So, when General Lane came down toting how he’d saved everyone; when the medics were loading Agent Jones and Lena, who had a pretty bad head lac, onto ambulances; Alex had lost it.

Enough so that Clark had interfered, pulling her away from the insufferable man who claimed he had ‘taken down CADMUS’, and depositing her on Cat’s floor while he pulled the General aside to talk.

Linda and Cat were in the CEO’s office when she arrived, the former being sent off for the day to recover from the elevator incident.

Siobhan wasn’t so lucky, hand already a blur as Cat rattled off a list of things she needed.

Linda looked back at them, over to where Alex was waiting for her and then back to Cat before steeling herself, wiping the tears from her face and going back to help.

Too many CatCo employees had been injured in the clusterfuck of a military operation that had resulted in a captured General Non of Krypton and several of his Kryptonian soldiers.The battle had apparently started as Non’s last assassination attempt on Cat before the DEO and Cat’s own CatCo security team had intervened.Fighting had spilled onto the main floor and many employees were caught in the crossfire even before General Dumbass Lane had shown up and escalated the situation by setting off a fucking _grenade._ The fallout had caused damage to the elevator shaft which was what had caused the unit to fall. 

It had not been a quiet or a controlled experience.There was a crowd of civilians, reporters, and law enforcement downstairs waiting for a report.Superman had taken his leave but they were still milling around trying to figure out why he’d been needed in the first place.

It truly had been an all hands-on deck situation.

_How_ Lane had captured _Kryptonians_ still remained to me seen, but the aliens were currently in holding at the DEO.Hank had text her and confirmed that they had arrived and were placed in cells without complication.

They did not have lunch that day.

By the time they got home that evening, they were both exhausted.

Alex, however, was pretty tired of almost losing her. She at least waited until after they had showered and laid in bed before attacking her girlfriend’s mouth.

Linda let off a startled grunt, her hands coming up to fist in the fabric at Alex’s chest before she tugged at it to come off.Alex happily obliged her, pulling the offending material over her head before leaning back down to lick a long stripe along Linda’s neck.

The blonde whimpered, fingers digging into Alex’s skin and tilting her head to meet the agent’s lips before flipping them over entirely.

This was new.

Up until now, Linda had seemed content to allow Alex to set the pace.Now, there was an almost possessive glint in her eyes, and she took her time kissing down Alex’s neck.Linda’s tongue traced patterns over the muscles and tendons of Alex’s skin, before using her teeth to nip lightly at her collarbone.

Alex groaned, trailing her hands down Linda’s back into the back of her pajama pants.A harsh gust of breath was released as Alex squeezed the firm flesh in her hand, tugging the blonde closer to her and grinding their hips together.

Fuck.

This was ridiculous.They still had their _clothes_ on for fucks sake.

Undeterred, Linda continued moving down, her lips closing around Alex’s nipple and her own fingers questing under Alex’s panties.It was the only article of clothing the agent had been left in after Linda had taken her shirt.A development she was more than happy with as Linda began to stroke along her lips.

Her girlfriend’s touch was soft, digits lazily circling Alex’s clit before dipping lower into her opening.All the while, Linda kept up a steady worship of Alex’s breasts.

Fuck, this felt good.Overwhelmingly so; so much that Alex felt actual tears burn at her eyes as Linda continued to stroke against her walls.That could also be from the insurmountable fear she’d experienced when she’d first heard CatCo was attacked but… semantics.The agent pulled at Linda’s head when the pressure got to be too much, fusing their mouths together when Linda acquiesced to her request.

She came like that, her lips half on Linda’s and half on the blonde’s cheek, panting openly with tears on her face.

Linda held her through it, slowing her strokes to bring Alex down gently and kissing her cheeks and forehead.

“I love you.”The blonde whispered.“No matter what happens, please never doubt that I love you.”

Alex didn’t respond; she couldn’t.

Her throat was closed making her unable to form words, her entire body quivering.She banded her arms around Linda’s shoulders, clutching her like a baby koala.

She couldn’t lose this.

She would not lose this.

~*~

‘Once more into the breach’, was the first thing Kara thought when she went in to Catco that morning.She’d left Alex asleep on the bed, the red head beautiful in her nudity and very clearly exhausted.

With the lack of Kryptonite in her system, Kara was feeling stronger than she ever had.ALFA had not been captured yesterday; she’d watched Alex make several phone calls where various intelligence agencies had confirmed much the opposite.

But Kara had not received a call from Lillian.

And, as much of an asshole as her Uncle Non was, he was no leader.He’d tried and failed to lead his own troupe for years before they had placed him with Astra, and it was then that his career had flourished.

Alone, at the head, he was nothing.He needed people to tell him what to do.

The other thing was that she had _recognized_ him.Her family was mostly still just blurry faces, but she thought maybe she was starting to remember things.She could honestly just be crazy but when she had seen them carting Non off, her mind had easily supplied her with the name to match the face.And a brief history of him and his character.As if she had known it all along.

Which, she supposed, she had.

It made sense in a way.

She hadn’t been reprogrammed in months.Felicity and Alex had reversed the Kryptonite.She was getting more than enough exposure to Earth’s sun…

It made sense that her memories would start to rebuild themselves.

It gave her hope that she had not lost everything; that even if Lillian took it away again, she could still get it back.

Seeing Siobhan seated at her desk, confirmed her suspicions that ALFA was still a threat.That everyone else thought they weren’t made Ms. Grant vulnerable.

After all the older woman had done for Kara—despite some people thinking her crass or abusive— Kara would not let her be hurt.Although her approach may need work, Ms. Grant had never said anything that wasn’t untrue.

She _did_ need to put herself first, at least sometimes.

And she _did_ need to make sure that Alex—or _anyone_ – treated her with respect.

She _should_ have treated Cat and Lena with respect and told them she was okay after the Christmas party.

And Kara had _never_ stood up for herself.Not really.Her past attempts filled with gaping holes and flimsy arguments due to her fear and lack of self-worth.

CADMUS had taught her that.

Cat had been working very hard to unteach it.

Cat had tried to save her, Kara could do no less in return.

She made sure to text Alex throughout the day.Normally, she didn’t have to, Alex usually being more or less within ten feet of her at all times.

Now that the “FBI” no longer needed to protect Cat Grant—a formal press conference from General Lane ensuring the disbanding of her guard—Alex had left CatCo for good.It would take some adjusting to no longer see her at work every day.

Kara had just finished the depressing thought—her body _almost_ achy with the number of errands, coffee runs, scheduling, and memo typing she’d had to do—when she sat down to lunch.She had hoped that maybe her and Alex could grab lunch together, but her agent was meeting with Maggie and Felicity to talk about the ALFA case.

Her girlfriend had also promised her an update on the dimensional fold.Felicity had reached out to a friend of Oliver’s named Oracle and Alex said they might be a _lot_ closer to making it work than she’d previously believed.

She’d also asked if she could loop Winn in, to which Linda had agreed.

She liked Winn, trusted him; he was her friend.If Alex said he could help, then she wasn’t going to cut him out.

Chewing slowly while reading Alex’s last text, a cute message about how much she enjoyed her newfound soreness, Kara was understandably surprised when Cat slammed a box down on her desk.

“What um, what is this?”She fidgeted with her glasses nervously, feeling weirdly caught given the nature of the conversation she’d just been pulled from.

“Bankers box.”Cat supplied, striking a bored pose as she glanced around Kara’s desk.“Typically used to carry one’s meager possessions as they’re being escorted to the elevator in disgrace or- by force if necessary.”Suddenly Kara was watching her ‘meager possessions’ being packed away haphazardly into said box, while Cat continued to glare at her.

“Wait, what are you doing?”

Cat grabbed her sandwich, dropping it unceremoniously on the top of the pile and picking the box up in her arms.

Siobhan smirked cruelly from her desk, hiding behind her tablet and fake typing away at some fake report as Cat strode away from Kara’s desk and the Kryptonian ran to keep up.

No.She’d just started to feel normal.Cat couldn’t take it away now.

Kara wouldn’t let her take it away.

Cat had told her to stand up for herself, to be strong.She could do that.

“Ms. Grant,” she tried, “I don’t know what you think I did but this is unnecessary.I have been an invaluable—” they marched past the elevator, a move that shocked Kara so much that she had to do an awkward spin move to keep up with the CEO. “—employee and I will continue to be so.I can generate reports of my impact on business and I have the respect of everyone in this office.If you fire me, you’d be doing yourself and your company a disservice and—"

Cat pushed open a door Kara had never seen, shouldering her way into the room and dropping the box on a white desk with a breath of relief.

Kara glanced around at the enclosed space, it was more of a large closet than anything else and it smelled slightly of popcorn.An old breakroom maybe?

“What is this?”She asked, trying not to let too much of her confusion show.

Cat gave her a proud grin, “your new office.”Cat spread her hands out, clearly pleased with her work.

Kara felt completely lost at this new turn of events.“I uh… you’re not firing me?”

“Oh, no.You have out shone not only every assistant I have ever had in my life, but also many of my senior employees.Yesterday, you could have left, and no one would have faulted you, myself included.Instead, you chose to stay.You chose to help and make sure that your fellow staff was ok and our business secure before leaving.Not many people would have done that given the choice.You _also_ risked your career for mine, and, given that little speech you just gave, you have _finally_ learned to know your own worth.I’m not firing you, I’m promoting you.”

Kara’s jaw dropped, her hands smoothing over her cardigan and skirt as she tried to process what was happening.“Wow.That’s… Ms. Grant I don’t know what to say.What do I—I mean—Well what do you want me to do?”

Cat gave her a look that combined annoyance with impatience and waved her hand as if the answer were obvious.“Well, I want you to get Solas up to date for starters.And then… well it’s up to you.You get to decide your future; you have 2 weeks to decide what it is you want to do with your life.”Kara exhaled shakily, walking dreamily around the room to rid herself of some of the nerves in her body.“Even if it isn’t something available at CatCo.I have many connections around the world and in almost every industry.If it’s within reason, I will help you get your foot in whatever door you choose.”

“I—” She bit her lip, eyebrows raising at the offer as she allowed herself to get swept up in the dream being offered to her.“Anything I want?”

Cat pursed her lips and ignored her.“You are still entry level in almost everything so be mindful that the pay won’t be much different… or any different but… this is still a big step for you Lidia.This is your “Working Girl” moment and if you take advantage of it, I truly believe that you can change the world.”

The CEO smiled at her, dropping her hands from where they had been resting on her waist and turning to leave the room and its stunned occupant behind.

“Ms. Grant.”Kara felt her hands shake and laced them together in front of her body, her thumbs pointing hopelessly out at her mentor.“The end of “Working Girl” always makes me cry.”

Cat hummed, a proud look etched on her face.“Me too.”The other blonde exhaled loudly, visibly shaking off the emotions permeating the air.“If you work hard, there might be a window in your future… Linda.”

Kara couldn’t fight the smile on her face, but she at least waited until Cat was well out of earshot before squealing and calling Alex.

She knew that reality would catch up to her somehow but this…

This was more than she had ever even imagined to be possible.

She could celebrate for a few hours.

~*~

Alex had just walked out of the DEO when Linda called her.

She’d spent her morning trying to convince Hank and Vasquez that something wasn’t right.They both insisted that everything was cleared and looked fine.Despite their assurances, Alex still had a weird feeling in her belly.

So, she’d told Hank that he needed to keep the investigation open and that Cat still needed a detail.He’d promised to take care of it for another week.

_“7 days Agent Danvers.We have more cases than ALFA to deal with, we still have a rogue agent out there that I want brought in for questioning.I’d imagined you’d be more invested in that.”_

It had been the truth, but it had still stung.

So, she’d understandably been less than happy with the way her morning was going.That had all changed when she’d heard her girl’s happy voice carry through the small speakers of her phone.

This being happy thing was becoming a normal occurrence when Linda was around and Alex wasn’t quite sure what to make of it.She’d said the words, had confessed her feelings using the only verbiage that had seemed adequate.It still felt lacking.

She felt like she should be doing something, yelling or running or _something._ But none of those actions lined up with what she was feeling so she accepted listening to Linda tell her about her day as a worthy prize for her restraint.

Cat had promoted her.

Not Alex her, Linda her.

Cat had promoted Linda.

Weird.

Not that she thought her girlfriend didn’t deserve it, and not that she didn’t _know_ how much Cat secretly cared about her young assistant but…

She just hadn’t thought Cat had it in her.

“That’s so great honey.I’m so proud of you!”

_“Cat said I could choose a career in whatever I wanted!”_ Linda squealed in her ear, clearly excited about her news.Usually she was much more reserved with her emotions, or at least a rambling mess but now… it seemed her cup runneth over so to speak. _“Well, she said within reason but gosh Alex!Can you believe it?I could… I don’t know.I—what does someone do with so many choices.I’ve never—Golly!I could be a journalist like Cat was; or go into IT like Winn; or even be a cool agent who saves people and has a charming girlfriend.”_

Alex chuckled, walking down the busy streets of National City to meet her Scooby Gang for lunch.

“You left off sexy.My girlfriend happens to be extremely and undeniably sexy.”She could feel Linda blush from over here.Point gazillion for Alex Danvers.

_“I just never thought… I don’t know how to decide.”_

“We’ll talk through it.You don’t have to decide anything right away, and we’ll go through some options.Find out your likes and dislikes.What you’re good at.I mean, you made me a working lightsaber, I’m pretty sure you could launch your own line even without Cat backing you.”

The restaurant they were meeting at came into view and she slowed her steps, trying to prolong her conversation with Linda as much as possible.

Linda made a noise of dissent, the phone crackling slightly as she moved around. _“I made that for **you.** I wouldn’t want to share what we create for each other with anyone.That’s ours.”_

Blushing slightly, Alex halted outside the doors of the restaurant.“Yeah well… I still think you’re an amazing artist.You could paint for a living; or be an architect; maybe go into graphic design.The world is your oyster.You are so amazingly talented Linda, whatever you decide I know you’ll be successful and I’ll be right there cheering you on.You could be my sugar mama.”

Alex smirked at her own joke, seeing Felicity walk up to her with a beaming smile on her face.

Linda’s laugh bolstered her even more, making a full-blown grin stretch her lips. _“This is all so… just wow.I mean I know that it probably won’t happen because… well you know.But I just feel so happy.I can’t help it.I just never expected… this is amazing.”_

“Hey.”Alex argued, her smile dropping.“Don’t say that.Felicity and I are working on that ok?You just focus on being awesome.We’ll figure out the rest of it later.I promise.You deserve to be happy Linda.”

_“I love you so much.”_ Linda said on her next exhale, a thank you and a promise all rolled into one.

Alex bit her lip, squinting up at the sun to avoid her best friend’s eyes.“I love you too.”

It felt weird saying that in front of someone; it felt weird _saying_ it at all.But she’d meant what she said.She wanted to say those words, wanted Linda to _know_ and never question what she meant to her.Her girl had been through enough hardship, Alex was going to make sure that her burden was at least a little lighter.If that meant expressing herself, then so be it.

Linda released a loud breath and Alex could almost see her pout start to form. _“I have to get back to work now, Ms. Grant wants me to make Siobhan the new me.It won’t ever work but I’m going to give it the old college try anyway.”_

“Ok honey.”Alex chuckled, pulling the door open and holding it for a positively vibrating Felicity.“I’m heading into the restaurant with Felicity now, I’ll text you with updates.”

They ended the call just as the hostess came over to ask how many people were in there party.Once they were seated at a table on the roof, a small smattering of people around them, Felicity burst.

“Did you seriously just say ‘I love you’?”

Alex ignored her, running a finger down her menu as she perused the selections.“Maggie should be here any second and Winn isn’t going to be able to make it.He still technically works for Cat and he didn’t want to risk being late back from lunch.”

“Alex!Come on!Dude, you seriously just told Linda that you loved her.You’re in _love!”_ Felicity smacked her arm with the menu, her smile almost splitting her face in half.

“I think I know how I feel.”Alex admonished, frowning at the abuse she had just received.“I am after all the one who is feeling it.This is not a big deal.Please don’t turn this into one of your weird motivational speeches where you tell me you believe in me.”

Felicity’s face, which had been excited and gearing up for such a speech became crestfallen at Alex’s words.Her own pout causing her to slump in her chair petulantly just as Maggie arrived, surprisingly with Kate in tow.So, no talking about the Linda Project.

It wasn’t that Alex didn’t trust her friends, but she hadn’t asked Linda if she could speak to them about it.There was no way she was going to betray her girlfriend’s trust.Not after everything they had already been through together.

“Hey guys.”Maggie sat across from Alex, allowing Kate to take the seat next to the agent.“What’d you do to Felicity?”

“I told her to mind her business.”

“Jerk face.”Felicity lamented, turning woeful eyes to Maggie.“She won’t let me celebrate her upcoming nuptials.”

“Oh my god.”Alex facepalmed, her cheeks flooding with heat.Why?Why did these things happen to her?

“You’re getting married?”Kate asked, shocked. “Don’t get me wrong hon, I’m really happy for you but… don’t you think you’re moving a little too fast?”

“I am _not_ getting married.I did not propose, nor do I plan to...At least not right now.”She shoved the menu in front of her face, eyes darting between the Cuban sandwich or the fish cakes.

“At least not right now?”Maggie asked.“That’s big Danvers.You’ve never even been a have a girlfriend type.Now we might be planning your wedding."

Felicity snickered, and she, Maggie, and Kate started talking about possible wedding attire and venues.

Alex felt hot and uncomfortable.Not because she didn’t want what they were describing but more so because she _did._

And she wasn’t sure exactly why.Or how long it would last.Or of anything really.She didn’t want to lead Linda on, but she wanted those things.She just wasn’t sure how long she would want them.How did anyone know that they would want the same things in 5 years, 10 years, 20?

How could you promise someone a forever, when you switched back and forth between hating fictional characters like you changed socks?

Clearly she wasn’t ready to think about marriage.

She dug in her pocket, a small ball emerging with her hand as she allowed the soft feeling of rubber to sooth her nerves.

“Please stop.”She requested, voice soft but firm as she glared at the menu and rolled the ball between her fingers.“I—this isn’t a joke for me.I…I do love her.I love Linda and I told her I love her and it’s not a joke.If we do decide to get married it won’t be until we have a lot more time under our belt so _please_ stop teasing me about it.”

There was an awkward moment of silence before Felicity rounded the table and glomped herself onto Alex’s lap, arms nearly choking her where they wrapped around her neck.

“I’m sorry.We all are.No more teasing I promise.We’ll adult now.”Felicity squeezed tighter, glomming their cheeks together and making Alex slightly blue in the face.“It’s just that we’re so happy.You have no idea how amazing this is; we were all so concerned you were going to wind up a spinster who ran kids off your lawn or dead because you slept with Thea again.Your future was looking bleak, but now… Alex I am so in love with happy Alex!”

Alex returned the hug, sighing softly.“Thank you.”

“Seriously Danvers, it’s good to see you with a smile that isn’t devious or condescending.”Maggie said, her face holding that soft look she got when Alex did something she liked.

Alex shifted uncomfortably; she’d always hated that look.

Kate cleared her throat next to her, “so who’s in for the guac and chips as an appetizer.”

The moment passed, the quartet quickly settled on their meal options asking their waitress for waters all around.

“Now that that’s done.”Maggie smiled victoriously at Alex, hands rubbing in front of her deviously.“How excited are you to be done with babysitting duty Danvers?No more bodyguarding.”

Alex pulled a face, leaning back in her chair as she thought about the case.“I don’t know.I feel like I should be happy but… I don’t know guys, something in my gut is telling me this isn’t over.”She sat up, her eyes going to Felicity and switching the ball between her hands easily.“Even the data you got from your contact doesn’t add up.It talked about ALFA planning something big.An assassination attempt on Cat Grant that _Lane_ could stop doesn’t really sound big.”

“Unfortunately, the interwebs have gone radio silent on ALFA.No one’s talking.I even checked over on the dark web.Nothing.It does seem extremely anti-climactic but Alex… maybe this really is a win?”

“I agree Danvers.”Maggie said, bumping shoulders with the blonde on her right.“Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth.I mean, we can totally keep our eyes and ears open for any movement but you have to also be open to the possibility that this thing might really be over.”

“Maybe.”Alex grumbled, that off feeling in her belly intensifying at their words.

“Hey,” Kate nudged her shoulder, a small smile on her face.“We’re not saying you’re wrong, we’re just saying not to stress it too much.And… not teasing here but maybe another reason you’re so upset is because you won’t be able to spend as much time with Linda?”Alex’s entire body flamed and she sunk lower in her chair.“It’s ok honey, Maggie and I used to spend nearly every waking moment together in Gotham.When she got transferred here, it was like I lost a leg.We all get it.”

Alex groaned amongst the words of agreement from Maggie and Felicity.

“My bet is on the less romantic version of this story.Sheldon doesn’t like it when other people solve her puzzles.”

Alex lurched up.“You shut your mouth, Sawyer.”

Maggie grinned.“And she’s back.”

Alex flipped her off, moving back slightly as her plate was set in front of her and stuffing her ball back in her pocket.Maggie chuckled, raising her fork to spear her own dish of nasty slimy looking green salad.In this moment, Alex was happy that Linda wasn’t completely vegan.She didn’t know _how_ she’d be able to deal with all of the weird food items Maggie enjoyed somehow ending up in her fridge.

…great.

Now she was thinking about them living together.

“Oliver and I were thinking of staying around until next week and then heading back to Star City.The team is getting kind of antsy without us there and we wanted to check in on them.”Felicity was saying as they all started in on their meals.

“That’s not a team Felicity, the kids are idiots and if I ever see Renee in person I’ll probably kill him.”Alex said, taking a huge bite of her sandwich.

Felicity glowered at her.“He has a child Alexandra.”

The agent hissed at the use of her full name and Kate laughed.

“I have to agree with Alex on this one Felicity.I still don’t know why you, Oliver and John decided on bringing on _those_ three.I mean maybe Curtis but the other two are assholes.”

“Hey!Batman’s nobodies teddy bear either ok?”

Kate shrugged.“Never said he was, but I also am not accountable to him in any way.He does his thing and I do mine.We team up when necessary and share intel.We’re professionals.You and your people treat everyone that comes into your little Arrow cave like they’re family.You bake cookies and everything.”

Maggie choked, her fist thumping against her chest.“Really?Cookies?”

“Oliver makes the cookies.”Alex interrupted, popping a fry in her mouth.“He makes them for Felicity because she has a sweet tooth but then she winds up sharing them.Unless they’re Nutella flavored.Than all bets are off.”

“Huh.”Maggie speared some more green goo on her fork.“Interesting.”

“My husband cooks, so what?Men can cook too. And share.We’re allowed to share and care about people and give cheesy motivational speeches and … yeah ok, Oliver is probably going to shoot Renee a few more times this year BUT he won’t kill him.That’s what family is all about.”

Alex gave her a smug smile.

The moment was interrupted by Maggie’s pager going off, a quick glance from the detective causing a scheming look to come to her face.

“What is it?”Kate asked.“Don’t you dare tell me you’re not coming to the floral planning!Maggie we’ve been planning this for _months.”_

“I am so sorry baby.”Maggie didn’t look sorry at all.“Apparently, we just got an anonymous tip for that new alien drug on the market.NCPD is giving a debrief now for a takedown.But you should still go pick out the flowers.No pink! It’s like the last thing on our list and then we can relax for the next 3 months.”

Kate huffed.“You wish.You’re sure you don’t need backup?”

“Nah,” Maggie shook her head.“Danvers is gonna come with me.Help clear her head.”

Alex looked up from her sandwich.“Wha—but I’m eating.”

“You’re turning down the chance to punch bad guys?How whipped of you Danvers.”

Alex scowled, thinking of all the rage she’d been stomping down.“Fine, but I’m doing my own thing.NCPD plans are always so boring.”

“Which is why they work.Boring works Danvers.You should try it sometime.”

Alex considered Maggie’s words, stuffing the rest of her fries into her mouth as she and Maggie rose to leave.She _was_ trying new things.And the whole reason she had been stuck with Cat in the first place was because she _hadn’t_ been open to simple plans, communication, and being bored.

Maybe…

“Fine.”She spoke around a mouthful of food, waving at Kate and Felicity as she grabbed her sandwich to take with her.“But just this once.”

Maggie laughed, kissing Kate goodbye and leading Alex out of the restaurant.

“Bye.”Felicity called out.“Make good choices.”

~*~

Kara stood in front of Lillian after being released from CatCo.Cat had had an ‘emergency’ at Carter’s school.At first Kara had been worried, but then Lillian had called and she had been less so.The woman was diabolical, faking (hopefully) an incident at Cat’s son’s school in order to call in her subordinates.

Next to her, Siobhan stood at attention, always aiming to please.

Kara was doing her very best not to look at her, hear her, or for the love of Rao _smell_ her.

It wasn’t because of the mutual animosity between the pair, no this was because of what she had almost walked in on at CatCo.

After Cat had moved her to her new office, Kara had gone in search of Siobhan to start her training.She’d followed her ears all the way to the storage closet, slowly becoming alarmed at the weird noises the woman was making.She’d x-ray visioned the door just in case she would need to fight someone, lowering her glasses to do so and promptly almost broke the frames in her fingers.

It had been horrible.

Bleach would never be enough to rid her of what she had seen.

She would never recover.

There was no way out of this.

Seeing Winn with his pants down and Siobhan splayed open in front of him…

Worst day ever.

She was never touching another person again in life.

There was no way she’d ever be able to look at either of them ever again.

Scarred.She was beyond scarred.

She was actually maybe looking forward to her inevitable memory wipe, if only to get that image out of her head.

Winn had run out at the sound of her cries and gagging, trying to explain his feelings while Siobhan had just stalked past them and sneered at Kara.

“What were you thinking?”Kara had hissed at her friend, feeling more than a little concerned for his mental wellbeing.

“I don’t know.”Winn had exclaimed, trying to fix his clothes as discreetly as possible.

“What do you mean you don’t know?You were… with… and… _Siobhan_ Winn?!”

“I don’t _know_ Linda.She’s just… I care about her ok?It’s not just sex.I care about her.”Winn had been so earnest that she had had no choice but to hug him.

Siobhan was going to destroy him and there was nothing Kara would be able to do to stop it.

Lillian had called them in shortly after that so Kara hadn’t had a chance to threaten Siobhan to within an inch of her life.

Not that it would have worked, it would have only served to make her that much more interested in Winn.

“As you know, there have been various news reports of the criminal terrorist group ALFA being detained by one Samuel Lane.”Lillian stood in front of them while her lab geek rattled off their debrief report.“These reports are false.The real leader behind this is this creature.His name is still unknown.You will kill him and return his body for research.Here are your coordinates and your time tables.Any questions?”

Kara hated when they asked that.The assets were never allowed to ask questions.

“Then dismissed.”

Kara and Siobhan moved in unison, turning to leave when Lillian stepped forward.

“Wait.”They both stopped.Lillian’s eyes zeroed in on Kara’s, her voice deadly.“K-2S0 do not fail me.If you thought your daughter saw pain before, it is nothing compared to what will happen should you disobey me again.”

“Yes ma’am.”

Siobhan shifted next to her and Lillian turned her cold eyes to her.“Is there a problem X5-452?”

“No ma’am.Sorry ma’am.”

Lillian sneered.“Dismissed.”

~*~

“Have you started planning my bachelorette party yet?”

Alex glanced over at Maggie in confusion.“What?”

“My party.”The detective stepped over a gross looking puddle, keeping her steps light and her voice soft.“You’re my best woman, you’re supposed to plan my party.”

Alex frowned, thinking.“Mario Party Marathon?Maybe a Super Smash Bro smackdown?”

Maggie flashed her a grin.“Throw in a Pokémon Stadium tournament and I’m there.”

“I was thinking,” Alex hedged, carefully placing her feet and using that as an excuse to avoid eye contact.“Maybe it would be ok for me to invite Linda as my plus one?She really likes you and Kate… well Kate at least, no one likes you.”Maggie flipped her off and Alex smiled.“It might be nice.Maybe.”

Maggie shrugged.“It’s fine with me Danvers, your girl is pretty special.”Maggie gave her a side-eye, halting as their party leader motioned with his fist.“She might catch the bouquet though… just sayin.”

Alex felt her cheeks heat, but she simply rolled her shoulder in response.

The thought of Linda catching the bouquet doing odd things to her belly.She knew realistically they were nowhere near marriage but she still found herself embarrassed to even be thinking about it.Had asserted so herself just at lunch.She’d never had to before; had never even entertained the thought.But now… 

The idea of Linda in a white dress…

Huge turn on.

_Mrs._ Linda Danvers.

God, she was a fucking teenager!

“ _Alright you two, time to shut up.You’re coming up on the party now.”_ The NCPD analyst spoke over their headset, warning them of their impending target.

They were in a team of 20, Maggie, Alex, Maggie’s partner and a smattering of other people that Alex didn’t know.Coming from the opposite end was another team of 20.The drug bust they had been tipped off about was allegedly taking place in the underground sewers of National City, a point that was centrally located and accessible from multiple entryways.

The NCPD had spared no expense, the alien drug had been wreaking havoc on the city’s population and, with the upcoming election, the Mayor wanted to make an example of someone.The shipment that they were intercepting was supposed to cripple the drug lord involved.And every exit and entry point were being guarded by 20 more armed officers.Half of the force was on this case.

It was all very boring to Alex.

A lot like a pissing contest in her opinion.

Maggie lifted her gun slightly, the weapon held at the ready as they approached their target.Alex copied her, starting to hear voices and peering out at the small group of people in the center of the well-lit room.

Construction lamps had been brought in from somewhere to facilitate the lighting, adding to the wall lights that they had employed on their trek down.In the center of the concrete room were a group of fifteen people.Ten men and five women.

They were talking in front of 5 large pallets loaded with boxes.

The drugs.

Turns out the tip was right.

_“Shoot out the lights.”_ The analyst suggested.“ _Then put on your Night Goggles.That should give you the element of surprise and result in a nonlethal takedown.Stunners only.”_

Alex watched as the force around her switched out their weapons, shaking her head imperceptibly at Maggie.Nonlethal force was all well and good, but her nerves were still shattered from the past few days.There was no way she was going into a gun fight with a taser.

Maggie held firm to her weapon drawing the ire of her team as someone called out their target.

“ _On my mark. 3…2—”_

The line went dead.There was no sound, no movement.

And then one of the men in front of them started laughing and pulling off his shirt.Alex slammed Maggie to the floor just as a green blast of energy erupted from the man’s chest.

Metallo.

Fuck.

Fuck.

This was a setup.

Officers were vaporized around them as the man spun in a wide arc, laughing all the while.The sound of discharging stun guns filled the air, but nothing landed—correction nothing had any _affect._ They glanced harmlessly off of the group of attackers and only served to piss them off more.

Cops all around her fumbled for their real weapons and died in the process.

Metallo paused momentarily to recharge and that’s when Alex saw him, and he saw her.

Jeremiah Danvers.

Her father.

"Hold your fire!Nobody moves!"Jeremiah shouted, his hand landing on Metallo’s arm.

Alex jumped up, her gun in hand as she took in the scene before her.Half of their people were dead or dying.Next to her Maggie resumed her feet and realized how dire their situation was as well.

Someone fired a few rounds from the other side of the hall and Metallo quickly let out a blast from his chest that ended in screams of agony.

“I said hold your fire.”Jeremiah sneered.“Their weapons are harmless.” 

Alex tensed, finger remaining poised on the trigger of her gun even as every instinct in her body told her to lower her weapon.This was her _father.Her dad._

 Jeremiah looked at her, his hand held out in peace. _"_ Alex.Put it down, I'm trying to avoid a massacre." 

"Don't even think about it Danvers!" An officer behind her sneered.Mackin; Maggie had said his name was Mackin.Mackin's voice was full of frustration, his gun remaining trained on their opponents."We have our orders, you keep your personal shit at home." 

Alex bristled, and saw in her peripherals how the remaining officers to her left shifted uneasily.It was a dangerous situation; the NCPD shouldn't have been tagged into this case.The Mayor had been completely over his head, his only plan to showboat a PR stunt for the election.Their intel had been wrong.This was rushed and ill planned.They had told them they knew what they were doing.

Except they really didn't and now Alex had to make a decision. 

She lowered her firearm, Maggie following suit shortly after and then her team.Mackin growled but kept his gun trained on Jeremiah Danvers' face. 

"This is treason Danvers, I hope that cell will be real comfy." 

"We're outgunned you idiot," The words were a hiss out of stiff lips, though by the small smile on Jeremiah's face he had still heard her."You wanna walk out of here? Lower your weapon.Let me talk to him." 

The scowl on Mackin's face was impressive but he eventually lowered his weapon just enough that it wasn't an immediate threat, allowing Alex to let out a slow breath and fully focus on her father.The agents behind him had all lowered their weapons when she had and now stood ready behind their apparent leader. 

He was older than she remembered, there were new lines and scars across his face and forearms.He was also more muscle than fat, and she was reminded sharply of the pie eating contest he had challenged Kara to.He'd had a stomach ache for a week and had been scolded by Eliza for just as long.Kara had felt so guilty, but her dad had just waved it all away with a smile and had turned it into a belching contest.Alex had won that one. 

She saw no trace of that man before her; this man was hard where her father was soft.He was a CADMUS agent.He'd joined CADMUS. 

"Hi Dad."She was proud when her voice didn't shake, especially when shallow gasps and whispers surrounded her from behind."Long time no see." 

Jeremiah smiled, shrugging his shoulders carelessly and shoving his hands in his pockets."Not my choice kiddo, that was your mother.I missed you, I came back to see you and she sent me away." 

Alex swallowed, forcing her body to remain loose and her hands to remain still at _that_ information.He was trying to get in her head, she had to stay focused."Yeah, well she might not have recognized you, what with the mad army scientist thing you've got going on." She gestured vaguely in his direction, a countdown starting in her head.  “The officers along the perimeter?”

Jeremiah chuckled, "still have that charming wit.You get that from me you know?They’re dead.All of them.The only reason any of you are still alive is because of who _you_ are." 

"I figured." she returned.She swallowed, mind working with the bare minimum of the plan she had concocted."We're sorry for barging in like this, how about we both pretend we never saw each other and call it square?"

“Can’t do that kid.I’ll let your friends go though, if you come with me.”

“Alex…” Maggie eyed her warily, shifting restlessly as she followed the conversation.“I will kick your ass.”

It was a good option.Trade herself for the rest of these people.Clark would come for her.Whatever happened, she knew now that Clark would come for her.

“I need a bit of insurance for that deal Dad.”

Jeremiah tilted his head in agreement.“They can all leave right now; you just need to stay where you are.”

Alex nodded, keeping her eyes trained on him.“Go.”

Maggie growled, grabbing her arm in protest.Alex didn’t even see the gun.She heard the gun shot, felt and saw Maggie fall; saw the hole in her stomach gushing forth precious blood.

But she hadn’t seen the gun.

She hadn’t _seen_ it.

The woman who had pulled the trigger was tall and lanky, her legs clearly artificial and her face an emotionless mask.

Alex stared at her.

Next to her Maggie gurgled.She was dying.She was going to die.

“Well now I think I’d feel better if you just walked over to me.They can still leave, but you need to come here.”Alex stared down at Maggie, unable to move as Mackin cursed and shoved his hands over her stomach.“Now Alex!She doesn’t have a lot of time.”

“Don’t.” Maggie gasped out.“Mackin don’t fucking let her leave.”

“Shut up Sawyer.”Mackin growled, tying off a compression pack on Maggie’s wound.It would hold her together for a while.Buy them time.

Her feet moved of their own accord, her gun hanging limply from her fingers as she moved over to her father.Mackin lifted Maggie in a fireman’s carry, he and his team disappearing back the way they had come.The other teams were already gone.

Alex had just accepted that she had at least maybe saved her friend’s life when more screams were heard from down the halls.

They were slaughtering them.

Tears sprung to her eyes as she heard the suffering taking place and she tried to go help.

To save them.

Jeremiah was already grabbing her arm, halting her movement.

She swung at him, her fist slamming into his head and her knuckles shattering at the impact.She howled in pain but used the distance the blow had created to bring her gun up and shoot him square in the chest.

He accepted the blow like it was nothing, grabbing her gun arm and pulling her into his chest.She struggled fruitlessly.

“It’s ok sweetheart.”His voice was as soothing as she remembered.“It’s ok.You don’t have to fight anymore.You’re ok now.You did so good, honey.You did so good.I’m so proud of you.”

Alex writhed in his grip, his hand holding her wrists behind her back.She jerked, trying to get away from him, and heard her shoulder pop.Her vision went white and then she was screaming.

“Shhh.”Jeremiah soothed, sinking to the floor with her.“You don’t have to fight anymore sweetheart.You can rest now.I’ve got you.Don’t worry, I’ve got you.”

_No._ She screamed internally, unable to speak past the pain and agony in her chest and body.This was her _dad_!Why was he doing this?Why had she let him do this?

She felt herself weakening, her fight fruitless against his enhanced strength.Evidently, CADMUS’ experiments had been successful across the board.

“Don’t hurt them.”She pleaded, still trying to escape despite the exhaustion that had set in to her bones.“Please don’t hurt them.You promised.”

Jeremiah pulled her closer, resting his chin on top of her head.“I promised they could leave, not that they would live.You will understand soon that in the grand scheme of things, their lives were immaterial.”

“No.”She whimpered, trying to think of something— _anything—_

A menacing growl sounded from down the hall where Maggie’s team had disappeared and Alex twisted to try to see what was happening.

A large wolf stood at the entrance, it’s fur bathed in blood.Its snout hung low, the ears pricked back and muzzle layered in wrinkles as it pulled back to display the sharp row of teeth in its mouth.The clear electric blue eyes were sharp and menacing, no sign of peace in the creature’s body as it bared down on them. 

The wolf stood at almost the height of the tunnel, blocking the entryway it had just emerged from.

Alex’s jaw dropped and Jeremiah sneered, lifting her back to her feet as he walked backwards.

Champ?

“Weapons ready.If it moves shoot it.”

No.

Metallo stepped in front of them, puffing his chest out and preparing for an attack.

No.

Alex threw her arms around Jeremiah, hugging him close and then spinning them into Metallo, knocking the man’s shot wide.

Champ barked, howl ripping from his throat as he charged the people holding Alex.He bit through three of them in one go, his hind legs lashing out and taking out another four.Shots rang out through the tunnel and Metallo roared his rage.

A huge beam of kryptonite energy slammed into the ceiling, and then another hit Champ in his side.Alex screamed, still trapped in Jeremiah’s arms.

Adrenaline fueling her rage, she grabbed a second gun, part of her Christmas present from Winn and Felicity, from her boot, shooting high at a pipe above their heads.

Water slammed into them, separating her from her father and allowing her to join the fray.She ran full tilt at the woman who had shot Maggie, catapulting over a man who was grasping his face and swinging herself feet first at the woman.

The woman caught her by the thighs, allowing Alex to wrap them tightly around her neck and, tightening and engaging her core muscles, swing the woman’s head down and to the ground.They crashed to the floor and Alex shot her clean through the skull.

Champ whimpered near her as more shots hit his flesh, his growl getting weaker as he tried to snap his jaws around another assailant.Alex shot that one in the back of the head, her free hand dropping to her pocket and pulling out the small ball she’d been playing with at lunch.She launched it at the man sneaking around to Champ’s rear and it exploded on impact, taking out the left portion of his chest.

Movement from behind had her dropping into a split, sliding between her attacker’s legs and coming up behind him.She shot him four times in the back before he fell down.The gun now useless without her ammo.

She dropped it, rolling out of the way as a club was swung at her head.The second swing hit her in the side, knocking the wind out of her and making her crash into the wall.Her head bounced of the concrete with a loud crack, stars bursting in her vision and nausea making her keel over.

_Don’t go to sleep.Don’t go to sleep._

_Get up Alex._

_Get your ass in gear!_

Fire erupted in her thigh and she screamed, the pain pulling her back from unconsciousness.Her hands slipped over the hilt of a knife, pulling the blade free from where it had been thrown into her leg and ducking under the third swing of the club.She stabbed her attacker under his left armpit, driving the blade as deep as she could get it.He thrashed against her and she hooked her foot against his thigh sending them crashing to the floor as she bore all her weight on the pommel of the weapon.

He went still, gasping for air as the knife embedded surely into his lung or heart.

Alex immediately rolled them so that he took the next 2 knives that were hurled her way.She pressed a button on her watch, a high voltage probe shooting from her arm and sticking to the woman knife thrower.Another button and the woman dropped like a rock, her body convulsing as electricity filled her system.

The man on top of her started to struggle again and she wrapped her body around him in a choke hold.The brute growled, lifting his torso—and Alex with it—and dropping heavily back down on his back.Alex gasped, her arms loosening just that bit, enough for him to pull an arm free and start swinging his elbow back towards her body.

Alex pulled one arm tighter around her neck, trying to make him decide between hitting her and breathing; her other arm frantically scrabbled at her lower back.

To be fair, she hadn’t come to this fight with the intentions of using her latest weapon but she was out of ideas and quickly losing blood.

Her hand closed around cold metal at the same time the man’s head collided with her chin.Alex saw stars but kept her wits about her enough not to lose her grip on the weapon.

She did lose her grip on her attacker, the man turning over on top of her and wrapping his hands around her neck.

He was fast.

Alex had just barely been able to tighten her neck muscles.

CADMUS liked fast, brutal, apes to do their dirty work.For some insane reason, Alex happened to glance to the side, seeing her father standing near an exit staring at her dispassionately.

She brought her armed hand between her and her assailant, pressing with her thumb.

The smell of burning flesh hit her nose and she watched as a smile bloomed on Jeremiah’s face.He was proud of her.

How sick was that?

Another press of her thumb and her lightsaber retracted back into the handle.There was no blood, since the blade had incinerated everything it had touched, but it was hardly any less unsettling for a dead body to fall down on top of you.

Alex pushed the body off of her, her clothes now completely drenched in her own blood and sweat, the mixture making her lean over and vomit.

The ground rumbled around her as Champ crashed into another wall, Alex forcing herself to her feet and bracing herself against the wall behind her.

Metallo screamed his fury, going for the kill shot on Champ and Alex grabbed for another explosive. Her fingers had just closed around the ball when he let loose the charge, the green energy slamming Champ into the wall.

Alex didn’t even think, just launched the ball and ran at Champ to protect him from the blast.She’d just covered his head when the room exploded.

That had been her last resort bomb, this area was about to become a flood zone.The room shook, pipes groaning and cement crumbling around them.She saw and heard Metallo grab her father and pull him out of the wreckage, both men escaping while they could.

Alex couldn’t leave.

She needed to figure out how to get Champ out of there.

She pulled back, intent on yelling at the stupid idiot when she saw that his eyes were open but unseeing.Alex pressed down hard on the fur at his neck, desperate for some sort of sign… 

He’d grown up into a large fucking wolf for Christ’s sake!Surely he could have survived fucking Metallo!This was a joke; a sick fucking joke!

No.

_No_.

Water touched her boot, but she didn’t notice, the liquid soaking into the knees of her pants.There was nothing.No thump to assure her that her friend’s heart was pumping blood through his body and not just out of it.No subtle rise and fall of his chest to show that he was breathing.No anything.Nothing.

He was gone.

_No_.

He was gone.

She glared up at the ceiling, hands fisting in large chunks of the wolf’s fur and biting her lip so hard that it started to bleed.

He was a puppy.

He’d been a puppy; she’d been holding him in her arms like two days ago.He’d been all wriggly energy and smug annoyance.

She couldn’t leave him like this.She couldn’t—

A small yelp, and sharp tug at her pants almost made her pull out her knife.A quick glance showed her that Wren was trying to pull her away from the large body in front of her.

Wren.

The sound of rushing water filled her ears and she shakily rose to her feet. 

Fuck, she had to get her out of here.She had to save at least _one_ life.

Alex made to pick the puppy up in her arms, but Wren darted out of reach, running down a tunnel and yelping, clearly asking Alex to follow her.

She did.

Moving sluggishly down the long shaft, she threw up again at the sight of the bodies strewn across the floor. Most of the dead were in uniforms, but Alex saw a smattering of unknowns amongst them as well. Half the force dead.

Half of the fucking force.

More than a hundred people had died.

Her _father_ had killed them.

She halted when Wren stopped at a body, tugging fruitlessly at the bulletproof vest there.

Alex, already tired from the fight and the emotional toll, wanted to yell at Wren to stop wasting time.Whoever that was, was dead and they needed to go or be dead with them.

“Danvers?That you?”

Maggie’s voice was weak, but it was enough to kickstart Alex into motion again.She scrambled over the other bodies— Mackin’s eyes staring sightlessly at the other wall—and grabbed at her friend.

“Maggie?”She sobbed, yanking on her vest.“What the fuck?You fucking idiot!”

Maggie groaned, eyes blinking blearily.“Easy with the merchandise jackass.”

Alex kissed her forehead hard, tears streaming down her cheeks.“Fuck.I fuckin hate you, you piece of shit.Don’t ever do that again!”

“I’ll do my best.”Maggie slurred, her bloodied hand grabbing at Alex’s where it clutched at her vest.“Am I bleeding that badly or is the tunnel flooding.I’m hoping its blood because getting shot is way easier to explain than drowning you know.”

Glancing down the passage, Alex shook her head.“Sorry, that’s water.We’ve gotta move.Hold on.”

She stood on shaky legs, holding her dislocated shoulder and gritting her teeth.This was gonna suck.

Slowly, Alex raised her injured arm above her head, tapping her fingers lightly at the curve of her opposite shoulder blade.The pain was unimaginable and she had to choke back her nausea as she moved towards the wall.Feeling the stone under her good hand, she leaned her injured elbow onto the wall and reached further with her fingers as she pressed into the wall with her elbow, bending the arm even further.

She was probably tearing the muscles to shreds; she just needed it to work for a little longer.Just a little longer.

A sharp pop resounded in her ears and she immediately found herself on the floor throwing up once again.

“Alex?”Maggie was half sitting up, her face alarmingly pale and her eyes bloodshot.“You have to go, you need to help—”

“Shut it Sawyer.Together or nothing.”She dragged Maggie up, seeing now that her vest had taken the brunt of the gunshot.There was definitely a hole—the indent clearly seen passed the compress Mackin had applied— and there was definitely blood, but it didn’t look nearly as debilitating as it had initially.She dragged Maggie’s arm over her shoulder, ignoring the flare of pain in her ribs and thigh.She had to get them out of here.She had to get them out.“Comms?”

Maggie shook her head.“Still dead.I think they’ve got a blocker up.”

Alex nodded, following dutifully behind Wren who leaped over the bodies around her and showed Alex where she could safely step.“What the hell did this?”

“Don’t know.I was out for most of it… I think there was a wolf?”

“Yeah.”Alex said, throat clogging.“Yeah.”

They trudged along, their steps starting to slosh as the water rose.

“Danvers,” Maggie garbled, taking a moment to spit out a mouthful of blood.“Danvers, you gotta get outta here.You gotta—”

“Shut up.I’m not leaving you.Just hold onto me, Sawyer.Just hold on.We’re almost there.”Alex herself was beyond tired, but there was no way she was leaving Maggie.No fucking way.

She stumbled, catching herself on a wall and wincing at the agony the move brought on.Maggie cried out, her hand pressing on her wound as if she was trying to keep her guts inside.

Fuck.

“’m sorry.‘m sorry Mags.‘s okay.We’re gonna be ‘k.”

Fuck, she could barely see in front of her.

Fuck.

Energy suddenly coursed through her and she righted herself, pulling Maggie back onto her.Glancing down, she saw and felt Wren pressing against her calf where her pants had torn.Huh.

She nodded at the Nalger and pushed on.

By the time they got to the end of the tunnel, the water was at their chest.Wren had taken to doggie paddling in front of them, her tan and white coat completely drenched in sewer water.

The amount of antibiotics they were going to need after this would be astounding.

Alex set Maggie near the ladder that led to the large vault like door in the ceiling, making her friend hold onto one of the rungs so she didn’t slip into the rising water.

The door had been open when they’d come down.

It was closed now.

Fuck.

She braced herself, quickly climbing up and using both hands to grab and twist the locking mechanism.

It didn’t budge.

Fuck.

Fuck.

Alex slammed her fists against the heavy metal, screaming as loud as she could to no avail.Wren whimpered below her.

Fucking fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

_FUCK!_

…

…

…

"Are we done lying to each other now, Danvers?”Maggie gasped, looking up at her from her position on the ground.

Alex's fists hurt.Everything fucking hurt. She could barely feel her arm.Her throat was killing her.

"Yeah."She cleared her throat when her reply came out as a sob."Yeah, Mags.We're done."

She turned away from the locked door and climbed down to haul Maggie up the ladder with her.Alex sat on one of the highest rungs, allowing Maggie’s body to float out in front of her and resting the detective's head on her leg.

Someone still might come.They had time.

They just had to be patient.

Maggie was smiling at her, blood staining her teeth, and making her look like a moron in Alex’s opinion.They shouldn't have come here.They shouldn't have fucking come here.Maggie deserved more than this; more than dying in a dank dark fucking tunnel.

She’d _told_ her that NCPD plans sucked.She’d _told_ her.

"Good." She choked out. "Cause I really like your girl Danvers but there is something seriously off about her."

Alex blinked, took her friend’s hand and pet her hair."That?That's what you want to talk about right now?Linda?"

A wet chuckle was her response.

"I think you and I both know her real name isn't Linda.And I need to make sure you’re ok.If I'm not here to look out for you I need to know that you'll be ok."Dark brown eyes stared at her imploringly, and Alex turned her head away, swallowing the sob that threatened to escape her.

"I'll be fine you big dummy."She squeezed Maggie's hand, hoping to convey some sort of strength."I'm always fine.You know that."

"Yeah.I do.That's the problem."

Alex pulled her up, moving up another rung and talking past the lump in her throat.“She won’t hurt me.Linda’s been as honest as she can with me, told me everything she can.”

“Well… at least there’s that.”Maggie convulsed, groaning as her body tried to cave in on itself.Alex held her tighter.

Wren whined and Alex opened her arm for the puppy to climb up next to Maggie’s head. The water churned around them, the sound of popping pipes echoing around the halls.

Trying to pull her mind from her imminent demise, Alex kissed Maggie’s head again.If they didn’t drown, the detective was at serious risk of hypothermia.Alex pulled her as close as she could, trying to share what little body warmth she had. “I was thinking… we could add some Mario Tennis to your bachelorette party… have a virgin drink bar for us recovering folk… what do you think?”

Maggie was silent, her eyes closed and face still set in a grimace.

Fuck.

“Mags?”

The tunnel shook, water sloshing and almost sending Alex hurtling from the ladder.The agent grabbed onto her charges, holding onto the ladder for dear life as more loud pops were heard down the tunnel.

Then the water slammed into her, knocking her hands from the ladder, only her reflexes allowing her to latch on with her foot as the tunnel was completely flooded with a new deluge of water.

She broke back to the surface, gasping for air and struggling to regain her grip on the ladder with both of her hands full.Wren clamped down on her arm with her teeth and although it hurt, Alex was grateful for the assistance.

“Maggie!”She cried, trying to get her friend to respond to her.She didn’t know how long they’d been under for and with Maggie’s injuries…“Mags!Wake up!Maggie, _please_!Help!Somebody help! _Please!_ ”

She hauled them all up to the highest rung, the water still sloshing at her shoulders and held Wren and Maggie in one arm.She used the other to bang helplessly at the steel door above her.

“Please!We’re down here!Help!Somebody!”

Wren barked louder, crying in earnest as water flooded Alex’s mouth.She forced all of them up as high as she could.Pressing Wren and Maggie above her own head.She felt the water hit her, the current nearly sweeping her back off the ladder.

She held strong.

They were going to die.

Fuck.

She felt herself start to lose consciousness, felt her fingers start to loosen around her friends.

No.

No.

Please god no.

There was a sharp wrenching sound of metal bending, something hit her in the ribs and then oblivion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo.... yeah.... It's not going to get better?
> 
> Honorable mention to Amanda Waller *tips hat*. I really liked her in Arrow, which was odd for me because classically well... I just hate her so much.
> 
> Also the scuicide squad is such a bittersweet plot idea. Painful but also so interesting... sheer genius.
> 
> I really like the quiet Alex and Kara moments. The mini fight over Kara going through Alex's things... it just adds another layer ya know?
> 
> Same thing with the date. It just allows us to really get to know our girls and see more of their dynamic. Although it does beg the question... what did Kara write in that notebook?
> 
> Also, the I love you scene was loosely based off of a scene in Love and Other Drugs. Mostly the panic attack that occurred when Jamie realized his feelings. Also the line, "She was my favorite person in the world, until now." is from Perks of Being a Wallflower. Great movies, great writers, great actors. Great all around. Also, another quirk, the street names Alex rattles off? The Cordova St is actually from Supergirl, it's the street sign that they open scenes with. I think I made flanning up and then Holdo is obviously from Star Wars.
> 
> Side note: as I'm writing these notes I noticed that you guys got a lot of sexy times in this chapter. That kind of makes it better right?
> 
> No? Ok.
> 
> The attack of CatCo. I don't know what to say about it except to say that I think General Lane was the largest incompetent Asshole in the Supergirl universe. Also, if you read Non in the comics, there's a bit of a spoiler there... Let's just say it's not the last we will see of him.
> 
> I also love how Cat and Lena bonded together to take care of Linda and then how Alex talked her through a panic attack over the phone like a fucking boss.
> 
> In case it was lost in translation, Kara is deathly afraid f the dark. When the lights go out she has panic attacks and thinks she's back in the phantom zone or CADMUS. Neither of those were very good places for her.
> 
> Then Cat "firing" Linda, that was pulled straight from the show and I tried to make it as hopeful as the show did... so I could tear down all your hopes and dreams with my next set up! 
> 
> Mwahahaha.
> 
> Alex and her friends had dinner, she admitted her love and told them to stop teasing her... and then her and Maggie walked right into a trap.
> 
> I'm afraid to ask but... what did you guys think of the Jeremiah scene? That was a doozy huh? Takes a real weirdo to write something like that...
> 
> Well anywho,
> 
> Champ died for sure, and Alex, Maggie, and Wren...
> 
> Well, I guess we have to figure out how they get out of this one huh?
> 
> Surely I'm not crazy enough to kill anyone else right?
> 
> That'd be cruel.
> 
> Side note: weekly reminder that killing is cruel... unless in the case of self-defense or something... carry on.
> 
> ~Chronicles.


	18. Say Something I'm Giving Up on You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!  
> Loved your comments from last week. I'll try replying after posting this but no promises I'll get to everyone. I did find it funny that everyone immediately thought Alex was going to get saved because I wrote something hit her. Just fyi, in my head, that was an actual pipe bursting and slamming her with more water and debris sooooo…..  
> But I love your optimism!
> 
> I have adjusted the chapter count as promised, I think that's correct now but you never know. I'm a rebel.
> 
> Song: Say Something- A Great Big World

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last time on Dragon Ball Z:
> 
> Alex made some emotional confessions about her job, her Kara, and her emotions. After calming her down, Linda told her she returned her feelings.
> 
> And then they kissed. :)
> 
> Cat chewed Linda out for not standing up for herself moments before Catco was attacked and the elevator they were in was plunged into darkness. Linda had a panic attack that Lena, Cat, and Alex helped her through and then Alex lost her temper with the alleged hero of the day: General Sam Lane.
> 
> Linda stayed behind to help at Catco and Cat promoted her for it: cue small celebration. Alex was super happy for her girlfriend, and put aside her worry that ALFA was not defeated to say some words of support, encouragement, and love... in front of Felicity.
> 
> Felicity, overjoyed that her friend finally found someone to share her life with, melted into a puddle and spent the beginning of their meeting teasing Alex mercilessly. Alex put a stop to it by actually being honest and then she and Maggie were called away to help with a sting operation.
> 
> A sting operation that went horribly wrong since it was nothing more than a set-up. Jeremiah Danvers, Metallo and friends killed multiple officers and when Alex tried to help, they shot Maggie. Champ came to try to save her and was killed in the ensuing battle. Wren led Alex away from the now flooded tunnel and to Maggie but their escape was cut off and they are currently in mortal peril. And there is where we begin our chapter.

** Say Something I’m Giving up on You **

 

Kara set up her scope on the roof, the device highly unnecessary given her enhanced eyesight but it would give her options.

Shoot to kill.

Or deal with the problem head on.

Lillian had apparently decided that ALFA had worn out their welcome.

Taking out their leader was a ballsy move, even for her.

That she had trusted the job to Kara and Siobhan spoke to how nervous she truly was.

Speaking of Siobhan… the woman had been oddly silent ever since Kara had caught her in Winn in that storage closet.Kara wasn’t naive enough to think that Siobhan actually cared that she was caught but something was clearly bothering her.

Not her business.

She didn’t even like Siobhan, why should she care what had upset her.

And she seriously needed to have a conversation with Winn.She understood that her best friend had a very human (albiet very unnecessary) desire to turn the bad guy good but seriously?Siobhan?Evil popular girls in highschool, Kara could understand.Alex, Kara could understand.Hell, even Kara herself, she could understand.

Winn had this innate ability to sense a person’s brokenness and then try to prove to himself and the world that he could fix it.

Siobhan however… Kara was pretty sure she could not be _fixed._

The woman was out for herself and herself only.

Winn was going to get his heart broken.

Kara inhaled deeply, taking on the lotus pose like Katu had taught her and emptying her mind, she needed to fous.Her Fukumen sat low around her neck, her blonde hair pulled back into a bun, loose strands blowing gently around her face and tickling her cheeks.

The sun was low, the sky painted in soft orange and red hues and the people below them much too engrossed in getting home to their loved ones or getting away from the stress of their lives to pay them any mind.

It suited Kara fine.

Less cleanup.

“I’m sorry about your kid.”

Kara frowned, the words taking a moment to process in her brain.She opened her eyes, slowly tilting her head at Siobhan in confusion.

“She shouldn’t…She’s barely a toddler, your girl.That’s not right.”The woman cleared her throat, rolling her shoulders and placing her hands on the stone ledge guarding them from the steep fall below.“You asked me once before… if I was just a puppet?I know you think I’m an asshole but for whatever it’s worth to you, I don’t agree with that.If I could change it, I would.”

Siobhan looked back at her, clenching her jaw and daring Kara to say something untoward.

She didn’t.

There was no warm feeling either; not like if Alex had been the one to say those words, or even Winn.No, this was more of a soft acknowledgement.A maybe hope.

A maybe _hope_.

“Thank you.”Kara replied, Siobhan nodding and turning back to her observations.

Kara took a moment to center herself again; she needed to focus.The alien in charge of ALFA would more than likely be a formidable opponent she’d need all of her mental energy to engage him in battle.

She heard him before Siobhan spoke; the nonexistent heartbeat replaced by the soft whirring of electrical circuits and processors.The absence of such a normality in humans and aliens alike alerted her to the arrival of their target.

“He’s here.” Siobhan stated, moving to stand on the ledge and get a better look, the white paint on her face glowing slightly in the dying light.

Kara stood slowly, moving to take in the villain from her sniper rifle.

She’d decided she preferred it this way.One muscle twitch and he was gone.She wouldn’t have to feel his life leave him, only hear it from a distance.

And it would keep Siobhan out of trouble.

Maybe she sort of didn’t want anything happening to the evil woman she’d been partnered with.Maybe the Winn effect actually worked or whatever…

She exhaled slowly as the green man came into view.He was tall, well over six feet and dressed in what looked like a purple and metallic grey space suit.Metal tubes protruded from the back of the ensemble and back into the suit, presumably supplying the alien with oxygen.A clear glass helmet protected his head from Earth’s environment.

In his hands was a long metal tube, almost 15 feet in height… lightning rods?

Not her concern.

She aimed at his neck; the glass might have a ballistic proof quality that would only serve to alert her quarry to her presence.People rarely thought to protect their necks in such a way.The target was smaller, but Kara was a Kryptonian.Such things were trivial to her.

The man slammed the pole into the ground with no assistance, the strength he exerted leaving almost 10 feet of pole above ground.

Another slow breath and she squeezed with her right index finger.

The specialized bullet flew straight and true, Kara tracking the progress with her enhanced vision.At the last second, she watched as a blue dome erupted over the alien and protected him from the impact.

Then his eyes were on her.

She scowled, dragging her Fukumen over her head and leaping after an already flying Siobhan as they raced towards the ALFA leader.

The man didn’t even flinch as they approached, the robot team surrounding him simply opening fire on the oncoming duo.

Kara turned her body, shielding Siobhan as they came in hot and then spinning at the last second.

The Banshee was ready, releasing an inhuman scream that escalated in decibels, shattering the heads of the robots effortlessly.

His entourage destroyed, Kara set them down easily in front of the humanoid alien, his dark green eyes appearing indifferent and cold.

Her eyes heated, the telltale heat vision erupting from her face and slamming into the man.The force field absorbed all of it.

ALFA’s leader sniffed, beginning to walk and meeting Siobhan who screamed directly into his face.

He punched her in the throat, a solid hit that had her collapsing.Kara caught his next hit, surprised at the strength and speed he was displaying.

He scowled at her.

“This is pointless Kryptonian.”He blocked her kick, hand pushing her knee down effortlessly and landing a solid blow to her stomach that actually _hurt._ “Neither of us will win this day and your companion will surely die in the battle.We both of us have more important places to be.”

Kara rubbed her abdomen, trying to think of a plan, find a weakness.She opened all of her senses, allowing her hearing to increase and tune into the alien’s body.There! A—

Her head snapped around, turning to the west.

No.

_No._

“I don’t imagine your master told you that she was going to take out the police force for me.A shame, she didn’t expect your human to be among them.”

_Alex!_

Kara felt her eyes burn hotter than ever before, screaming her fury as the lasers slammed once more into his force field.

And once more did nothing.

The alien only shifted his weight, bored and annoyed.“I would stop dallying.She doesn’t have a lot of time left, your Alex.”

No.

No.

She grabbed a protesting Siobhan and took off, the Banshee struggling in her grip the whole time.Kara didn’t care, she couldn’t care.

“You idiot!”Siobhan screamed from below her.“Lillian will kill us both.She’ll kill your _daughter_ Kara!Think you moron!”

But Kara was thinking.

She dropped Siobhan on a roof, far enough away from the alien that she’d find her way home.

Lillian wouldn’t kill Kalasin. Kally was her prized possession.She’d do everything in her power to protect her investment.

But Alex…

Alex was _dying._

Kara was listening to her die!

No.

No.

Please Rao no.

She slowed when she approached the empty side alley, dropping quickly into the dimly lit area and pushing aside a heavy metal door to the warehouse like building.The sound of pounding that she’d heard on her short flight over was gone, only desperate cries of help remained.

Scotland Harper scurried over to her from where he had been behind his bar, his face set in rage as he threw a knife at her.

She caught it easily and continued past him, ignoring his hate filled threats as she descended down to the basement of his club.

The floor rose in a sort of pyramid like scheme, the fans blowing incessantly and keeping the cellar chilled.

Kara noted that the vile man had had all of his liquor cleared from the room.

When he came up behind her she slammed him into the wall, her eyes glowing a fiery blue as she kept him pinned with her elbow.

“If she dies, you die.Nothing will stop me.And I will make it slow.”

Scott swallowed, his face shocked when whatever he had tried to hit her with had no effect.Being physically free of CADMUS had its perks.

The man scrambled back up the ladder and Kara turned back to the faint sounds coming from the other side of the room.

Moving quickly, she reached for the door in the floor of the room, the heavy vault like entry way sealed and blocking her from Alex.

She grabbed the circle handle, turning with all her might.

It snapped clean off.

A closer examination showed that the handle had been melted onto the door.

They’d trapped her in there.

Inside, she heard Alex’s screams getting drowned out; soft barks becoming weaker.

Wren?

She reared back, her fist clenched and ready— and her head exploded.

Kara collapsed to the ground, her head clutched in her hands as her skull erupted in agony.

Not now.

No, not now.

Choking back a scream, she pressed her palms harshly into her eyes, the metal of her arm biting into her skin and distracting her enough to give her _focus._

Her earlier bout in the sun had given her energy and she credited that to her being able to remain awake through the pain.She sobbed as she struggled to her feet.

She couldn’t hear Alex anymore, only her heartbeat.

No.

No.

Her hands shaking, she dug her fingers into the crevices of the door and pulled.The vibranium in her hand hummed against the force she was using, easily bending the metal it encountered as if it were tissue paper.

But not quickly enough.

Her head hurt too much for her too move quickly.

CADMUS sent another wave of energy to her implant and she grit her teeth against the pain.She felt something trek down her face, and blinked, red blurring her vision and making her eyes sting.

The metal started to bend in her hands and she tugged harder, putting most of her weight in her legs and _pulling._

The door snapped in half, leaving Kara with enough room to maneuver into the tunnel below.

She felt Wren first and dumped the struggling puppy onto the cement above her.

Alex was below the water, her fingers stuck in the vest of another woman.

_Maggie._

No.

She dove into the water, swimming under the duo and grabbing either woman around the waist.Alex’s foot stuck on something, stealing precious seconds from Kara’s rescue.

Neither of them were breathing, and Kara quickly lifted them out of the water, flying them up and into the empty cellar.

She turned Alex over first, pumping her chest as hard as she dared. The agent’s chest gave under the steady pressure of her hands, her wet vest gritty against Kara’s palms. Less than a minute of the treatment and her girlfriend started to spit up water, Kara nearly sobbing at the sign of life.

Unfortunately, she had no time to celebrate and Kara quickly moved to her friend, the detective’s lips an alarming blue already and making Kara’s heart race.She didn’t hesitate in turning Maggie to start CPR, giving her the same treatment she’d just given Alex but adding measured breaths to her routine to get the detective breathing again.

Nothing.

No.

Rao.

_Maggie._

Another minute of no reaction and Kara paused, an idea coming to her and making her pretty sure she was an idiot.

CADMUS was sending pure electrical volts through Kara’s head right now… ergo she was going to turn herself into a Kryptonian defibrillator.

It’s not like she could make the situation worse…

Right?

She rubbed her hands together, slowly at first and then picking up speed until they were a blur in front of her.Impatiently she waited for—

Pain.

She almost blacked out from the force of it but forced herself to spread her hands and press them to the side and top of Maggie’s heart.

The human’s body bowed beneath her hands and Kara strained her ears to listen…

She ripped her hands away, dropping to her side as Maggie’s heart weakly started beating again.

Alex was still unconscious next to them.

_Rao._

That had _hurt._

Breath coming in ragged pants, Kara rolled to her back and pressed her hands to her eyes.She wiped the wetness there and pulled them back to see blood staining her fingers.

Her eyes were bleeding?

The watch on her wrist felt warm, but she felt no signs of the Kryptonite that would normally be flooding her system.

Felicity had done her job well.

Kara was now marked for death.

She swallowed her fear.

It was fine.

She’d been marked well before this.

Wren licking lightly at her cheek had her sitting up and hugging the puppy close to her chest.

The Nalger was crying, soft whimpers coming from her as her small body shivered in Kara’s hold.

Champ was dead.

Her little brother was dead.

Kara held her close, trying to sooth what hurt she could before standing and gently tucking Wren into the satchel at her hip.

She’d need her arms to get Alex and Maggie to a hospital.

Her robotic arm felt stiff, and she wriggled the fingers there to make sure it hadn’t been compromised before lifting either woman into the area under her arms.

She landed at the nearest hospital less than gracefully.

Her head was killing her, the constant presence of CADMUS trying to kill her and Earth’s yellow sun trying to heal her was sending her body into hectic spasms of confused agony.

A small crater emerged where her feet met the hospital’s floor, and she carefully placed both women down before taking off again.

She barely listened as the doctor’s and nurses, originally shocked into stillness, erupted into motions and sounds.

Kara needed to go.

She needed to get in touch with Artax.

With Ni and Fiora.

She needed to get to another time zone.Somewhere where the sun was rising, not setting.

She needed a few more hours.Just a few more hours and then she could rest.

~*~

Kara landed outside of the alien bar as quietly as she could, Wren still shivering in her pack.The events of the day had caught up with her and she was now in full on panic mode.

She’d fucked up.

For years she’d done everything she was able to do to protect Kalasin; to make sure her daughter was as safe as she could make her.In a matter of minutes, she had thrown all of that work away.

She ran her fingers over her naked wrist.Apparently now that she was technically at full power, she was strong enough to rip off vibranium.She needed as little CADMUS tech on her as possible; she couldn’t take any chances that they would be able to track her.Not now.

Now she needed to use her head.

Kara couldn’t run.Even if they didn’t kill her daughter, Kalasin would still live the life that Kara had been forced into.Kara had learned early on that there were worse things than death.

She could only hope that once Alex woke up—she _would_ wake up, Kara was not allowing herself to think of another outcome— she and Felicity kept their word.That they made the dimensional fold; that Felicity cracked through the encryption and found CADMUS’ locations.That they saved her daughter.

She fingered the necklace around her throat idly, the tracker in the turquoise giving off a miniscule hum of energy.When Alex had first fit the necklace on her, she had wanted to call her out on it but her human had seemed so sincere… 

It had also been incredibly adorable that Alex cared enough to want to know where she was.

At all times.

As long as the necklace was on.

All the time.

Ok, so maybe her human was slightly psychotic, but Kara was hardly one to judge when it came to mental capacities.

…still very adorable.

Barring Felicity’s success, she had hopes that Alex would at least try to find her.DEO technology had to be as advanced as CADMUS’, especially if Winn was the one making it.

They’d find her.

They had to.

It was the only thing keeping her standing right now.

A noise from the backdoor of the bar made her look up and she was relieved to see Mon-El step out with bags of garbage.

He was of her house, surely, he could help her.

“Mon-El?”

The man jumped, swaying slightly at her unexpected call and blinking blearily at her from under the dim streetlights.

“That you Beautiful?”

Kara wasn’t sure if she was the ‘Beautiful’ he was referring to but she didn’t have time to delay.

“I need your help.”She pulled her pack from her shoulder, scooping Wren out of the saddle bag and allowing the puppy to wriggle into her neck.“There’s an alien—”

“Nope.Sorry lady, you got the wrong guy.”Mon-El waved a careless hand at her and staggered back to the door.Kara sped in front of him, finally getting the strong stench of alcohol when she was closer.“Woah, how’d you do that?”

Her shoulders drooped.“You’re drunk.”

He laughed.“Usually am.S’what happens when you lose your entire planet.”

Steeling herself, Kara grabbed for his hand.He wrenched it away, stumbling backwards into the adjacent wall.

“Mon-El I need your help, please there’s no one else.Alex was hurt—”

“Danvers?Seriously?Did she see a spider in the shower again?Cause that was epic!”

“Mon-El!”She grabbed at him again, tightening her grip so he couldn’t pull away.Wren whimpered in her arms and his eyes darted over to the small puppy.“ _Please._ There’s no one else.I need you to get her home.”

“Nalger was destroyed last I checked.”The man said condescendingly, frowning down at his arm as he tried to remove it from her grip.

This had been a mistake.Another in a long list of mistakes she’d been making.But she hadn’t known where else to turn.

Winn wasn’t an option; as much as she loved her friend he was hardly prepared to deal with the might of CADMUS if they discovered she’d gone to him.

Lena and Cat were out for the same reasons.

She’d considered going to Alex’s friends, Clark and Lois, but they were still located at the camp and she couldn’t go there.She couldn’t put those people at risk.

She wouldn’t.

Mon-El had been her last hope.

He’d be able to protect himself and if he really did have Superman’s protection as Alex had said, then he’d have back up as well.

She needed him.

“There’s a camp of alien refugees not far from here.She can tell you where to go.I just need you to get her there.”She pulled an envelope from her pocket—her apology letter to Alex, explaining everything she had been able to in as much detail as possible.“And please, get this to Alex.”

Mon-El looked at Wren and shook his head, his eyes glassy and wrought with unhappiness.“You got the wrong hero kid.”

“Mon-El, you’re the _only_ hero.I don’t have anyone else. _Please.”_ Kara tried to keep her voice steady, tried not to let it shake with the fear and sorrow that was threatening to overwhelm her.The last thing she needed was to break down in a seedy alley.“Please.”

“Are you fucking kidding me with those eyes?Fuck, fine.Give her here.”He took the letter from her and held out his hands for the puppy.Relieved beyond measure, Kara handed Wren over to him making sure to give the Nalger a small kiss and whispered words of encouragement.She’d be with her mother soon.

Wren sniffed at Mon-El, regarding him silently for a moment before chuffing and snuggling low in his arms.

Kara offered him a small smile.“Thank you.”

She turned to go, intent on getting back to her apartment and setting off her alerts for Artax.He’d start the hunt for Kalasin immediately and as soon as the dimensional fold was ready, he’d suck her into it.

“Hey!”Mon-El’s voice halted her and she turned to see what had prompted his call.“You in some kind of trouble?”

His voice was still a little slurred but there was a hint of genuine concern in his features.Kara smiled at his kindness.Jerks with hearts.

“Nothing I can’t handle.Thank you, Mon-El.”

He opened his mouth to respond but she had already launched herself into the sky.

It was unlikely she would see him again in this life.

_Merry meet, merry part, and merry meet again._ She thought silently.The Kryptonian parting prayer now vivid in her memory.

She wished she had more to offer him than the words of a dead world.

~*~

_She was in the field of scotch bloom again; her house in the distance.A gull cawed at her from overhead and she squinted up at the sky to try to see the bird._

_Behind her waves crashed, making her body move with the ebb and flow of the tide._

_Was she supposed to be moving?_

_“Alex.”_

_Kara?_

_“Alex, can you hear me?”_

_Kara._

_Alex turned, intent on finally seeing her lost friend—but she fell instead._

~*~

The first thing Alex became aware of was a sensation of flying, but when she opened her eyes she was on a bed, a team of medical professionals working around her.

She sat up, ignoring their attempts to keep her down and pushing herself off the bed.Her leg screamed in agony and she nearly blacked out again when she tried to draw breath through damaged ribs.

The doctor that caught her was less than impressed and carefully maneuvered her back down.

“Ms. Danvers, we need you to lie still.”

“Doctor.”

“Yes?”The man asked, feeling along her neck for fractures.

“No.I’m a doctor.”Alex explained, pushing up again.“I’m stable, no life-threatening injuries.”Her throat was killing her, and her body was one big ache.“I need to check on my friends.Detective Sawyer is she here?”

The man frowned, clearly exasperated.“You have a stab wound to your leg—”

“It didn’t hit anything important—”

“At least three _broken_ ribs—”

“I need to see my friend—”

“And a severe concussion.We don’t even know the extent of the injuries you may have sustained due to the probable drowning—”

This time he stopped talking because Alex had yanked him down to eye level, her face set in a menacing glare.

“I understand you are trying to do your job.”She said calmly, trying to speak clearly despite the rough rasp in her throat.“But the thing is that I don’t care.Where is Detective Sawyer?And the dog?A huskie puppy?”

The doctor was pale, unable to move from her grip and thus too scared to speak.Alex scowled about to _hit_ the idiot and probably make things worse when a voice interrupted them.

“She’s next door.”Kate said, her voice shaky and tears on her cheeks.“Alex… she’s… they don’t think…”

There was a female doctor standing next to Kate, her hand resting on the woman’s shoulder as she struggled to speak.“Dr. Danvers, I’m afraid your friend is showing very minimal brain activity.We treated her gunshot wound and physically, she’s stable.Unfortunately, we think the lack of oxygen to her brain has caused something called—”

“I know what it’s called.”Alex said angrily, finally realizing that she was surrounded by interns. Hypoxia.Maggie had cerebral hypoxia. _If_ she woke up, she’d be little more than a vegetable. Alex plucked at the hospital gown she was wearing.“Where are my clothes?”

“Alex…”Kate tried, moving to stand by the bed.

Alex swung her legs off the side, standing before the woman could reach her.“I need my clothes Kate, I need to get out of here.There was a dog, a puppy—did anyone bring in a puppy?”

The group looked around them, before shaking their heads.

“Dr. Danvers,” the original doctor tried.“No one else was brought in.The alien in black flew only you and Detective Sawyer before—”

Alex froze. “Alien in black?”

Ok, maybe a stretch but Alex didn’t know all that many flying alien’s that dressed in black.

He blinked, obviously afraid she would grab him again.“Well she flew and she had a red eye so we thought alien but…?”

“Did she have a metal arm?”

“Um, I think so?”

Shit.

The RAT.

She’d completely forgotten about her.She moved towards the closet in the room, finding a bag of her belongings and trying to pull them on.It was pointless as she still had an IV and a ton of other wires and tubes attached to her.

Walking around with a catheter?

Not a good idea.

But they’d left Wren.

The Nalger puppy might still be there, might be scared and alone…

“How long have I been here?”

“A few hours.”Kate replied, her voice still shaky.“I just got the call a little while ago.I called your mom and Felicity but I didn’t have Linda’s number…”

Alex couldn’t look at her, hated herself because she was so weak.“Was my mom ok?”She asked instead, finally giving up on the pants and just slumping into the armchair in the corner of the room.Eliza was prone to extreme reactions when it came to Alex and she tried never alerting her mother unless it was an emergency.For Kate to have called Eliza meant that maybe Alex was worse off than she originally thought.Her head _was_ killing her.

It wasn’t letting her think.

Why would the RAT save her?

Alex had been sure the alien had been an ALFA lackey, maybe CADMUS.But saving Alex?That went against the interests of both parties…

Unless her father— _Jeremiah_ she reminded herself, that man was no longer her father.Unless Jeremiah had ordered her to.

It made no sense.

Her hands were shaking she noticed, and she closed her eyes to try to head off the pounding in her skull.

“Alex, you need to get back in bed.”Kate’s voice was insistent now and Alex kept her eyes closed for entirely different reasons.She couldn’t _look_ at her.

She couldn’t—

“Did you see my phone maybe?I have Linda’s number in—” She hated how shaky her voice was; it was all falling apart.

Everything was tumbling down around her.

The doctor was already shaking his head, his arms crossing in front of him.“I’m afraid your phone was completely water damaged, we were unable to use it to gain access to any of your contacts.Detective Sawyer had her police badge on her and so we were able to gather her information from her precinct.All you had on you was your ID.”

Right.

Of course.

She ignored the tears that finally leaked from her eyes, clenching her jaw and glaring down at her feet—the only safe place in the room.

Fucking hell.

“Alex please—”

“You should be with Maggie.”

“Alex…” Kate pleaded, her voice absolutely broken.

“There’s a chance… people come back from this.You just need to… if you sit with her maybe—”

“Alex!Stop it!”Kate crouched down in front of her and Alex tilted her head away from her, unable to meet the woman’s eyes.“She’s gone Alex!She’s gone and I can’t—get the fuck in the bed Danvers.”

Alex stood up abruptly, the room spinning and sending her into a vomiting fit.She puked her guts out, and then she coughed, which set her lungs on fire.Her tears came harder, until she could barely breathe, but she still fought the staff and Kate off as they tried to get her back in bed.

They only backed off from trying to sedate her when they realized she was still completely capable of kicking their asses.

Kate grabbed at her again, well and truly crying now.“Alex—”

“Alexandra Caroline Danvers.”The crowd hushed as Felicity pushed through and grabbed Alex’s face between her hands.Alex let her.Her friend’s brows were bunched together, worry and concern strewn into every line of her face. Felicity sighed, pressing their foreheads together, and lightly stroking Alex’s cheeks.“What do you need?”

“I need to go home.”Alex managed to whimper, her good hand coming up to grip Felicity’s wrist.The arm that she had dislocated was wrapped in a sling and strapped to her chest.

Felicity pulled back, eyes searching Alex’s face before she finally nodded.

The blonde turned to the doctor’s without releasing Alex.Security hovered in the hall behind them, waiting for a signal as to what to do.“Is she stable?”

“Ma’am I don’t think—”

“I didn’t ask you to think.”Felicity interrupted, practically snarling the words.“Someone just murdered hundreds of police officers; they tried to kill my _friend—_ they succeeded in putting the other into a fucking coma.So, I don’t need you to think.I need you to tell me whether it is safe for me to take her home.Who do I need to hire, and what do I need to pay?”

Alex sobbed, overwhelmed by the support and conflicting emotions.Her body sagged, and Felicity easily caught her, bringing her forehead to her shoulder as the doctor huffed but explained her care instructions.

Then the interns were removing tubes and wires from her body, Alex unwilling to let Felicity go now that she had found a small form of stability.

Felicity helped her dress, her hands shaking as the staff offered them old scrubs they kept around for cases like this; where the patient’s clothes were so damaged that they could no longer be used.

“Your mom is flying in tomorrow.There weren’t any planes tonight but she should be here by tomorrow afternoon.You’ll go to sleep when we get back and she’ll be here by the time you wake up.”Felicity was explaining as she carefully maneuvered Alex’s injured arm through a shirt sleeve.Alex tried not to make any sounds at the pain that the act of getting dressed caused her but a few escaped regardless.Felicity ignored all of them outwardly, despite the tears that were staining her cheeks; focusing instead on the task at hand.“I got in touch with Hank and he already has a team investigating what happened.Everything’s taken care of.”

The blonde carefully pulled Alex to her feet, her hands steadying her friend as she got her bearings.Alex blinked at her tiredly, the adrenaline from earlier long faded into outright exhaustion.

“Linda?”She asked as Felicity maneuvered them to the door.

Her friend’s lips pressed into a thin line, her face darkening at the mention of the woman.“I tried to reach her, it all went to voicemail.”

Worry gnawed at Alex’s gut.“We have to stop by her apartment.”

“Alex, I really don’t think you’re in any shape to do that.”Kate said, from where she was waiting at the door.“You’re hurt and I—”

“Kate _please_.I can’t… _please.”_

The red head looked devastated, her face the picture of destitution.

Logically Alex knew that Kate had lost way more than she had that night; that Maggie would want her to be there for her fiancée—ex-fiancée?What did someone call a soon to be deceased woman’s bride to be?

They’d been about to get married.3 more months and Maggie would have been someone’s wife.

And Alex had _tried._

_She’d tried so fucking hard._

“Oliver called Dick and Bruce, they’re taking the jet…”Felicity shifted uncomfortably, biting her lip as she tried to figure out how to help.“Do you need anything?I can get Oliver to stay and—”

Kate was already shaking her head, dragging her eyes away from Alex’s ruined form.“No, thank you.I’m just… they’re making a room for her and … I need to make some calls.Maybe, do you have Ray Palmer’s number?I know he was working on nanite technology and—”

“Done.”Felicity confirmed.“I’ll send you every neurologist from my surgery as well.And Curtis Holt, he’s the one who made the chip in my spine, I’ll pass his information as well.We’ll do everything we can Kate.I promise you, we will fight this with all we have.”

Kate nodded gratefully, took one more look at Alex and then left. 

Felicity pressed trembling lips to Alex’s temple.“Come on, lets get you to bed.Oliver’s downstairs with the car.”

“No.”Alex protested, not even trying to pull away.She’d need all her strength if her girlfriend was in trouble.“I need to check on Linda.I need to—”

“She didn’t answer Alex.I promise I tried—”

“The last time she didn’t answer I had to wipe blood off of her floor.”Alex did pull away now, taking carefully measured steps towards the elevator.“I promised her—those men in the tunnel, one of them was Jeremiah.If he’s been watching me then he knows about her.It might not be a coincidence that she’s not answering.”

Felicity hurriedly caught up to her, wrapping her arm around Alex’s waist again and pressing the button for the lobby.

By the furrow of the blonde’s brows, Alex knew that she was at least thinking about it.It wasn’t until Oliver had helped maneuver Alex into the backseat of a black SUV, Felicity pulling her over and down so that she was resting in her lap, that the blonde asked Oliver to make a detour to Linda’s apartment.

Even then, the duo insisted on walking her up.

Alex picked the lock again.Or at least she tried to.Oliver had to take over when it became clear that her injured arm wouldn’t allow her to move correctly.

The drugs had mostly worn off by this point, so she was left with nothing but pain and mental clarity.The last time she’d felt like this, she’d woken up tucked away under a tree stump with a massive concussion and Kara had been gone.

She desperately needed to see Linda.

She needed her to be ok.

When the door swung open, Alex knew something was wrong.There was nothing majorly untoward, everything was mostly as Alex remembered it being but the little nick knacks and ornaments that had adorned the apartment were gone.

And Linda was sitting cross legged in the middle of the living room.

At first Alex thought she was meditating, but then, upon closer inspection, she realized she was just staring mindlessly at a picture frame on her refrigerator door.The last piece of personality left in the small space.

Her girlfriend’s head slowly turned to face them, eyes blinking slowly as if she were coming out of a fog.Then she was on her feet and in Alex’s arms, her face pressing harshly into Alex’s neck.

Alex held her back just as tightly, feeling something solidify in her chest as Linda’s breath ghosted over her skin.

“You really need to learn how to answer your damn phone Taylor!”Alex whimpered, fingers digging into Linda’s back.“God, I thought something had happened to you!”

Linda tried to pull away, but Alex only held her tighter.“I’m sorry.”She murmured.“I had to get rid of it.I—you shouldn’t be here Alex.It’s not safe.”

Alex let her pull away this time, a cold feeling running through her veins.“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Linda’s eyes were redder than they normally were, as if she’d been crying?But no, that wasn’t it… something was _wrong._

“Nothing.”The blonde quickly asserted, bringing her hand up to stroke over Alex’s cheek and giving a tremulous smile.“But you’re hurt and you should be in a hospital.”

Wrong.

Something… Linda was dressed as she normally would be if she were getting ready for bed.She had on loose black athletic pants and a white tank top.Her hair was slightly greasy looking but that could have just been from the workload of her day.

She might not have had a chance to shower…

Linda always showered.

She’d spend hours under the water if Alex let her.

This was wrong…

Something was missing.

“Why aren’t you surprised that she’s hurt?”Felicity asked, eyebrow quirked and stance slightly defensive as she came to stand next to Alex.

“What?”Linda’s eyes snapped to the other blondes, her own wide and brown and _caught._

“You didn’t seem surprised to see her here, in this state.You were relieved.You didn’t know she was on that op, and it wasn’t on the news that she was there so how—”

“I told her.”Alex interrupted, eyes on Linda’s naked wrists.Her watch was nowhere to be seen.“I told her I would be there during the lecture.I was bored and so I text her… Fe, I’m gonna stay here tonight.”

Felicity was frowning.She and Alex had basically grown up together, they had a lot of the same quirks and they could tell when they were being lied to.

Right now, Felicity’s Spidey sense was going haywire and she had no idea why.

If Linda was misleading them than it would have made sense, but Alex had said that she wasn’t, and Alex had never lied to her.

Not until now.

Dropping her hand from around Linda, Alex reached over and grabbed her friend.“Trust me ok?I’ll be fine.I’ll call you first thing in the morning ok?”

Scowling, Felicity opened her mouth for a sharp retort, but Oliver laid a calming hand on her shoulder.“I’ll drop you off at the hotel and then come patrol the area tonight.”He too was looking at Linda, though he hid his suspicion behind a kind smile.“Whoever attacked you is obviously extremely dangerous and we shouldn’t take any chances.I’ll make a few calls, have some people on standby.”

Linda swallowed, and Alex saw the fear in her eyes.She wanted to hold her, reassure her.

She wanted to hit her and ask her what the _hell_ she had done.

“Do you know the angle of my window?I can leave a marker—”

“No need, I can make my own calculations.Besides, any marker you leave will be able to be seen by our enemies as well.Better to do it this way.I’m Oliver by the way.”He held out his hand and Linda immediately took it.

Alex watched as he squeezed.

Linda didn’t flinch, barely seemed to notice the pressure.

“Just—whatever you need to keep her safe.I can give you a key.”She pulled her hand away, barely noticing that Oliver had tried to _hold on_ and retreated to a little bowl by her door.She returned with jangling metal.“Here.So, you can stop picking my lock.”Linda forced a smile, obviously trying to make a joke.

No one laughed.

Oliver and Felicity just looked confused now.

If Linda had been behind the attack, it would make no sense her helping them now.Except she was and her level of genuineness could not be faked.

“I’ll call you in the morning.”Alex insisted to Felicity, tilting her head towards the exit.

Huffing, Felicity nodded and pulled her into a careful hug.She hugged Linda too and recited Alex’s care instructions, handing over a pharmacy bag filled with antibiotics and pain medicine.

Linda nodded along to everything, face alert and focused up until Felicity and Oliver left.

Then it was like all the fight went out of her; her entire body just deflating.

“You shouldn’t have done that.”The blonde shook her head, placing Alex’s prescription bag on the counter.“You shouldn’t have lied to your friend, not for me.”

“No.”Alex confirmed.“I shouldn’t have.”

The blonde raised tired eyes to Alex’s face and it only served to make Alex angrier.“Why did you then?”

Alex honestly didn’t know.

She’d never lied to Felicity about anything and now—

Now…

Fuck.

“Why did you make me lie?Why didn’t you answer your fucking phone?How did you know I was hurt?How—Wren!Where’s Wren?”

“On her way to Fiora.”Linda answered simply—honestly.Like she had nothing to hide.

Alex threw up her hand, agitation flowing freely now.“How did you _know_ that?! How did you know she wasn’t at the camp?What the hell is going on Linda?!”

Her girlfriend frowned, her hands pressing harshly into her eyes as she let out a low whine.“Alex, _please…”_

“No.No; you don’t get to do that.My best friend is lying in a hospital about to be pronounced brain dead.Champ _is_ dead.They’re not coming back.The time for games is over Linda!Tell me what the fuck is going on!”

Linda walked away from her, moving blindly through her apartment, hands still on her eyes as she pushed through into her bathroom.

Alex followed her, but Linda closed the door on her face.

The sounds of throwing up came through the door and Alex slammed her fists on the wood.Fear and worry mixing to create a cocktail of anger and frustration.

“Open the door Linda.Dammit!Just talk to me!What the fuck are you so afraid of?”

Linda ripped the door open and moved past Alex.There was more of that odd redness to her eyes, and the weird coloring had spread to her cheeks.She held a wet cloth in her hand that she pressed to her face again as she leaned against the back of her armchair.

The blonde stood there for a moment, her entire body tense before finally relaxing again.

“I don’t know… I’m not sure what more you want from me Alex… I’ve given you everything I’m able to—I can’t—I don’t have anything else.I have nothing left Alex.I don’t know what more you want from me.”

Alex strode back to her angrily, her good hand wrapping around Linda’s wrist and pulling her hands away from her face.She was sick of this; sick of Linda being calm and endearing while Alex flew of the handle.The woman had to have some sort of emotion, had to see how serious this was.People were dying and she was sitting in her apartment like everything was _fine._

“I want you to tell me the truth for once!I want you to give a damn!I want you to—"

Linda exploded.

“You think I don’t?Rao Alex!I have never lied to you!Not once!Of course, I care!You—You’re… Fine!You want me to tell you what’s going on?I don’t know.Some fucking psychopath put you in the hospital and put countless others in body bags.That’s what I know.I don’t know anything else.You think that I’m this all-knowing Alien seer but I’m not.You don’t know anything about what I know—”

“Because you never _tell_ me.You tell me everything I want to know about aliens but nothing about you.Fuck, I have to find shit out from my friends—from my _mother—_ because _you_ won’t tell me what you’re feeling or thinking unless you’re hurt!”

“And you’re so much better?You wear _your_ heart on your sleeve?”

Hell this was so not the way Alex had seen this conversation going.She went to run her hand through her hair in agitation and winced when the move pulled unkindly at her ribs.Linda took a step as if to help her and Alex threw her the harshest glare she could manage.“Don’t!Stop trying to take care of me!I don’t need—I try.I try to tell you what’s going on in my head ok?I—I’m not used to this—”

“But I am?”

“ _Yes!_ Fuck!You—you’re fucking rainbows and sunshine and _nothing_ fazes you.Not death threats or me hitting you—”

“You _pushed—”_

_“I DON’T CARE!”_ She hadn’t meant to yell, hadn’t meant to lose herself this badly but she’d been holding this in for _months._ Her throat hurt and screamed at her for igniting more pain but… Why would Linda choose her?Alex had done nothing but _hurt_ her; put her in even more danger than she was seemingly already in. Alex _had_ puthands on her; no matter that Linda wanted to make the ill-advised discrepancy that it had been a push not a hit, the fact remained that Alex had touched her in anger.There was no excuse for that; for a lot of things she had done.She was a shit person, a shit _friend,_ and a shittier girlfriend.

She was just _shit_.

Worthless shit.

Linda’s eyes sharpened, the red surrounding her eyes darkening with her anger and making the brown seem almost gold in the dimly lit apartment.

“You want to know what I’m thinking?”Linda threw down her towel, moving so that she almost towered over Alex with her height.“You want to know my _feelings?_ I think you’re crazy! —"

“Hey—”

“Batshit, as Ms. Grant would say! —"

“ _Excuse_ me—”

“ ** _No!_** I’m talking now!You wanted me to talk and I’m telling you that you are mentally imbalanced!The craziest person I’ve ever met and that is seriously saying something and— _I love you.”_ Linda face was pleading as she dragged agitated hands through her hair. _“_ I am in love with you Alex.I don’t mind your craziness, I love it.I love you.Flaws and all.You came in here, yelling at me because you’re pissed off about Champ and Maggie and those officers, and you’ve somehow worked it out in your brain that it’s your fault.It’s not.You’re just crazy enough to believe it is.”Linda’s finger stabbed at her chest and Alex took a half step back to avoid further assault from the pointy digit. “And you’re yelling at me because you want me to get hurt and leave you but that’s not going to happen.You want to punish _yourself_ by destroying _us_ and I won’t let you.This is the only goo—No.You can be as crazy as you want, but I’m not letting you go.It’s what makes you, you and it’s perfect. _You_ are perfect.”The blonde looked at Alex’s shocked face helplessly, obviously trying to make her understand what she was saying and frustrated that her words didn’t seem to be having the affect she had hoped.Her hands went to her hips and Alex was reminded very suddenly and strongly of Clark when he did his Superman pose.“It’s like Jenga, take away one piece and the whole thing comes down.You lose everything.I want you _whole_ ; I want you _always_.All of you.Everyday.That’s how I feel.That’s what I think about.I think about ways we can be together.”One hand left her hip to gesture between the two of them before she dropped both to her sides despondently.“Ways to make us work even though it feels impossi—”

Linda cut herself off, her blonde head ducking again as all the fire left her body.

There was a tense moment of silence where Alex tried to string two words together, but her throat was clogged and dry and uncomfortable and… geez.

Fuck.

Fuck.

Alex tried to cross her arms but realized one of them was still broken, and so settled on holding her bad arm with her good hand.

It burned a little.

“Why?”Alex finally managed to ask, her voice shaky despite the confidence she tried to exude.“Why would it be impossible?”

Linda shook her head, arms crossing to wrap around her middle as if she was holding herself together.Alex’s heart broke at the sight.

“Linda?”She tried, stepping into her girlfriend’s personal space and cupping the back of her head.Her thumb stroked the sensitive skin in front of her ear, tangling slightly in the blonde hair there.

Linda licked her lips.“I…”another headshake.

Alex sighed and kissed her.She’d meant it to be soft, a reassurance so Linda could _finally_ tell her what was going on… but it quickly turned desperate.Alex had lost so much tonight.

Maggie was…

Alex had tried.

_She swore to god she had tried._

And for a brief moment when Felicity had told her that Linda’s phone was going to voicemail, she had thought she had lost her too.Had thought Jeremiah truly was hellbent on taking away everything she loved.

“I’m here Alex.”Linda murmured between kisses, trying to get Alex to slow down, her own voice clogged with tears.Her hands trailed soothing patterns across Alex’s body as she continued to try to turn the bruising roughness into soft caresses.“I’m right here.I’m yours.”

Alex had to pull away as a sob threatened to overwhelm her.Linda pulled her close, holding her as she cried, before gently picking her up all together and bringing her over to the bed.

She laid Alex down carefully before curling her body around behind her.Alex released all of her pain and hurt in heavy choking sobs that gradually dwindled to weak cries.Linda kissed her cheeks, her ears, anywhere she could reach.Whispered words of love settling between them like a warm blanket.

Linda’s hand scooped under her, supporting her ribs through the worst of the crying fit and allowing Alex to breathe through the magnified pain.

Her girl cradled her as gently as possible, her hands moving in a soothing dance and calming Alex ridiculously quickly.

“How did you do that?” Alex asked wearily, her eyes already drooping closed.

“I don’t know.”Linda admitted, an almost scared quality to her voice as she pulled Alex closer.Alex was more than half asleep, her head cushioned on the blonde’s breasts when Linda spoke again. “Alex? What happened was not your fault.You are not to blame; you didn’t hurt Champ or Maggie.”Alex’s lips thinned and she clenched her eyes shut but Lina continued.She didn’t have a lot of time now and she needed Alex to _hear_ her.“You’re a good person Alex; the _best_ person.My favorite person.I love you and Maggie _loves_ you.No one blames you but you. Fiora doesn’t blame you.Champ was… he was going to make his own choices whether she liked it or not.Nalger’s aren’t known for not following their impulses.Champ loved you; do not dishonor him by belittling his sacrifice.”Alex whimpered and Linda kissed her forehead, allowing her girlfriend another, softer crying session that had her on the brink of sleep once more.“I love you Alex.I just… I needed you to hear that… and I won’t be here when you wake up, I um, I need to go in to work… But I gave something to Mon-El that might help you figure out what happened.I didn’t know I’d see you tonight and—just when you wake up find him ok?”Linda pressed another soft kiss to the Alex’s head, her own tears wetting her lips.“I love you very much Alex Danvers.No matter what happens, please remember that.”

Alex’s fingers dug into her shirt and she nodded sleepily, already slipping back into unconsciousness.She had questions—so many questions.But in the grand scheme of things—she couldn’t find it in herself to care at the moment.Champ was gone; he’d died protecting her.And Maggie… there was very little chance that she would recover.

Alex had been well on her way to being a doctor and she knew the science involved.Maggie would need a miracle.Alex had advised all of her friends on their final wishes; she had 90 days to find said miracle.

After 90 days, Maggie wanted to be removed from lifesaving devices.

3 months.

Alex was going to need all the rest she could get.

~*~

Kara swallowed back her tears, pressing her face into Alex’s hair and inhaling her scent.She smelled like sewer and death and it only served to remind Kara of what had transpired in the last twenty-four hours.

She had been a fool.

Going into this mission she had been aware of her timeline; CADMUS had never played coy, they had made it clear that she was their property and that there was no escape.No contract that she could buy her way out of.

The only way you left them was in a body bag.

And she had still had the _gall_ to hope.

She’d actually imagined a _life_ for herself; with Alex _and_ Kalasin.For a brief fleeting moment, she had thought that maybe she could be happy.

That was all moot now.

All that was left was to clean up loose ends.

Exhaling slowly, she carefully pried herself from Alex’s arms, the redhead whimpering slightly and making Kara ache with sorrow.

She should have told her the truth.She should have explained everything while she had had the chance; Alex would have been upset but she would have understood.

Now she was going to wake up and find Mon-El and read some crappy letter that Kara had rushed to write.

She wouldn’t understand.

Kara had had a chance to make her understand and she had chickened out.

She’d been so afraid.

She stood on shaky legs, taking one last longing look at the woman in her bed before exiting the room.She was still afraid.

She was a coward and fool.

Alex deserved better than that.

It didn’t matter anyway; Kara’s time was up.She had to go in to CADMUS.Lillian was going to wipe her or kill her.She should have been terrified at either of those prospects.

It just made her tired.

She was so tired.

So preoccupied was she in her thoughts that it took her almost a full minute to realize that Siobhan was now in her living room.

The woman was still in her tac clothes but her face had been cleared of the heavy paint she tended to wear.And she did not look happy.

“You’ve really done it this time you idiot.”

Kara rubbed an exhausted hand over her face.“I’m sorry Siobhan.I won’t fight you I swear, I was on my way to check in now.”

The brunette shook her head, her eyes shooting daggers at Kara from where she stood.“We’re way past that now Kara.This is on you. _I_ didn’t want this. _You_ did this.”

Kara opened her mouth to ask what she was talking about, but Siobhan was already pulling a large glowing green rock from her pocket.

Kara dropped to her knees nearly instantly, the magnitude of the Kryptonite somehow affecting her quicker than usual.She snarled up at Siobhan, her aggressor only looking on with pity as Kara’s veins bulged green for the first time in years.

“Lillian cooked this up special for you.She said she knew she would need it one day.”Siobhan’s voice trembled with her words, her eyes slightly glassy as she held the deadly rock in her hand.Kara had never seen the woman flinch but now here she was trying to force her hands to remain steady even as she shook her head in defeat.“I really am sorry about this… about your kid.Daybreak.”

A resounding thud sounded through Kara’s head, like a gong being wrung and she groaned at the weird sensation.

“Siobhan…”

“Hunter.”

“Siobhan stop!”Her heart felt like it was clawing its way out of her chest and she pressed her hand to the skin holding it in as Siobhan continued despite her objections.

“Solo.General.Sky. Nineteen.River.Angel. One.Demon.”

Kara sneered, fury taking over her body as she felt herself slipping away.The fire burning inside of her gave her just enough energy to lash out at the woman tormenting her, her hand closing around Siobhan’s leg in retaliation.Siobhan merely stepped out of her hold, keeping up the repetition of words, Kara still crawling along the floor in an attempt to stop her.

The pain increased to unbearable levels until finally, Kara rolled over onto her back; her fingers tearing at her head as she screamed for Alex.

Every time she got wiped she felt like she was on a snowy mountain where the winds were trying their damndest to push her off.Most of the time she remained standing; others she would fall to her knees; and still others she’d be hanging on by the very tips of her fingers.

This time, she was blown clear into the abyss.

She fell.

She lost everything.

~*~

 

Fields of Scotch Broom lay open under a bright summer sky.She was on the cliffs, overlooking the ocean some ways behind their house.It smelled of salt and something distinctly earthly. The waves crashed smoothly on the beach, just a touch of foam on their tips.If she got her board now, she could still catch some of the calmer waves; clear her mind.And then she heard Kara’s laugh, loud and full of life, somewhere off in the distance.She turned half expecting to see the effervescent young woman behind her but she wasn’t.

Only the vastness of the fields lay before her, her childhood home sitting far in the distance.

She’d just allowed the usual melancholy to seep into her bones when she heard her voice. __

_Finally heard her voice._

It had been so long.

“You came.”Kara said from behind her, voice alight with joy.“Even though you’re about to break.”A soft hand touched her shoulder and even though everything in Alex wanted to turn around and see her, she found herself immobile.“That’s a good sign.”Kara hummed, a soft happy sigh leaving her as she pressed her face to Alex’s hair.“So, why did you come?”

Alex’s heart pounded in her chest, but she felt calm; as if there were two of her experiencing completely different things.

She was with Kara.

Finally.

But she couldn’t see her—touch her.

She wanted to do both.

She’d earned that much hadn’t she?

Alex would atone for her sins for the rest of her life if she could just see her one more time.

“I think,” Alex swallowed, trying to form a response to Kara’s question.“I think… I want to be… forgiven.”Linda’s words from earlier came back, about how she made everything her fault and how it was craziness to do so.She didn’t want to live like that anymore.“I think I want that more than … anything.”

Alex was tired… so tired.

Kara laughed, the sound light and airy and Alex felt the ghost of a kiss touch her shoulder.

“Forgiven?”Kara asked as if it were the silliest question in the world. “By who?”

A gull swooped by Alex’s head, screeching in her head and forcing her to duck to the side to avoid the hit.

She jolted awake, her breath coming in heaving pants as she took in the room around her.The phone Felicity had left with her was vibrating incessantly and Alex quickly swiped her finger to accept the call.

“Hello?”She asked trying to clear her throat of the roughness and finally taking in her surroundings.She was still in Linda’s bed, but the blonde was nowhere to be seen.Alex frowned at that and moved a hand over her ribs.They grated slightly and she held back the cry of pain that came with the sharp movements she’d made.

_“Alex.It’s Winn.Listen, I was working on that data dump and Siobhan’s name came up.”_ Winn’s voice was angry and hurt but Alex had little time to dwell on that before he was speaking again.“ _There’s something weird about her but I haven’t gotten that far into the details yet.She’s dangerous Alex and if she is working for the people that were sent after you than my guess is her next target is—”_

“Linda.”Alex finished, already pushing herself out of bed.“Call Felicity, tell her we’re coming to her hotel.It will have better security and we can bunk down until we figure this out.”

“ _I’m on it.Alex… be careful.I already almost lost you once today.”_

Alex nodded, realized Winn couldn’t see her and then spoke with a creaky voice.“Promise.”

They disconnected the call and Alex walked out to the living room.She saw Linda immediately, dressed head to toe in black, her blonde hair was pulled back into a bun and she was staring resolutely out the window, head tilted slightly as if she were listening for something.

“Hey you.”Alex said, moving towards the woman and ignoring the burning pain in her injured thigh.“Don’t stand so close to the window ok?It’s not safe.”

She tangled their fingers together pulling her girlfriend further into the room and reaching up to cup her cheeks.

“Hey.”She prompted when Linda didn’t respond or even look away from the window. “Are you ok?What’s wrong?”

Alex cupped her jaw, pulling gently until Linda locked eyes with her.

Blue eyes.

Or at least one of them was blue, the other was an extremely disconcerting red.

Alex dropped her hands and stepped back.“Linda?”

“That’s not her name.”Alex whipped around, hand going for a weapon that she didn’t have.Siobhan stood behind her, clothed similarly to Linda her hands resting behind her back.

Feeling more than a little underprepared Alex, took a step back, her hands reaching for Linda again.

“Linda, get in the bathroom.”The blonde didn’t move except to shift her head back to the window.Agitation bled though Alex’s voice as she felt the situation escalate.“Linda—”

“I told you that’s not her name.She also isn’t your Linda anymore.She’s K-2S0 now.”Siobhan walked closer to them, seemingly frustrated and Alex pressed her back to Linda’s side, moving them further away from the brunette.

“The hell is that supposed to mean?”She snarled.

“It means that she is an experiment; a weapon forged to take down whoever she is ordered to.”

Alex shook her head, finger pressing the power button on her phone three times.Felicity being who she was would have set up the phone’s SOS feature.They’d get a picture, location and audio file within seconds.She just needed to stall.

“Let me guess, you’re going to order her to take someone down.”

“Catherine Grant.”

A heavy weight dropped in Alex’s stomach.“You’re ALFA.”

She’d asked.She’d asked Linda and the woman had lied to her face.Alex turned to her girlfriend angrily, grabbing her face once again and trying to resolve the image of blue and red eyes where brown had once been.“Linda, I need you to talk to me.What is going on?”The blonde turned back to the window and Alex scowled, tugging her head back viscously.“Linda!Dammit, answer me!I know you can hear me!”

“She actually can’t.”Siobhan interrupted, her jaw clenching with her fists.“She can only focus on her mission.You’re more of an annoying fly than anything else.”

“What the hell did you do to her?”

“I didn’t do anything.This is who she is.The sooner you accept that the better.”Siobhan frowned at her as if she were wholly disappointed in what she was seeing.“You got played Agent Danvers.There were never any feelings; no romance.We were both of us sent here to win you over to our side.But you have failed—spectacularly and we are out of time.”

“Out of time for what?”Alex hedged, finally backing away from Linda and turning her full attention to Siobhan.

“I am not a fool villain who monologues my final plans.It’s over Alex.You should go now.”

Looking between the two women, Alex decided that the more pliable option was Siobhan.“You can stop this.Whatever you’re planning—”

“Oh, please stop with the negotiation tactics Agent.We both know you suck at them.”

“So what would you have me do?Watch you kill an innocent woman?”

“Cat Grant is hardly innocent.”

“Maybe, maybe not.The point is that she is a key player in ALFA’s plot of world domination.Whatever they told you Siobhan you have to see that what they’re doing; the riots, the murders, the discord, that’s not good for anyone.”

Siobhan scoffed, her eyes darting from Alex to Linda and back.“And your people are so much better.You procreate like rabbits and then kill each other once you’ve decided there are too many of you.None of you _really_ care what happens to the other, you just say you do so that people will think you’re a nice person.It’s all bullshit.You want people like me to get behind you—fight beside you, but you have no idea what you’re fighting _for._ Your peace is an illusion.You don’t even believe in it yourselves!”

Alex shifted uneasily, trying to think of a way out of this while also stalling and not getting distracted by the pounding pain in her skull.

She should have taken the pain meds before bed.

Why hadn’t she just taken the stupid pills?

She grit her teeth, trying to remain calm and alert.“That’s not true.”

“Please.”Siobhan waved a hand at her, as if she were swatting away Alex’s words physically.“If you truly believed that peace could exist there would be no guns.There would be no K-2S0 and I would be free.Why should we ever trust you, when you can’t even trust each other?”

Rage filled Alex’s chest at the mention of Linda and she swallowed harshly.“I don’t know what you did to her—”

“I already told you I did nothing.”Siobhan exclaimed in annoyance.

“I have her.”Linda’s voice was monotone, devoid of any kind of inflection and the blonde shifted slightly as if to leave through the window.

“Linda baby listen to me,” Alex pleaded, no longer even caring if Siobhan heard them or not.There was more at stake here than her pride.She cupped Linda’s cheeks and brought her head down again until their eyes met.“I don’t know what they told you to do but whatever is you don’t have to do it. You can make your own choices honey. _Please,_ just come with me _.”_

“Those are not my orders.”Linda moved away from her, taking a step back and refocusing on whatever it was she was seeing out that damn window.She pulled the doors to her balcony open and Alex felt desperation set in.

“Screw your orders!”Alex grabbed her arm and very suddenly found herself pinned to the wall, a strong metallic hand wrapped around her throat.

_You’ve got to be fucking kidding._

The RAT.

Linda was the fucking RAT.

“K-2S0 state your tertiary objective.”Siobhan’s voice was oddly detached, her posture tense and angry as she took in the scene before her.

Linda blinked slowly as if coming from a fog.This close Alex was able to see that her eyes were not only no longer brown, but also that the red one was cybernetic.The iris actually layered chips that moved as her eyes shifted, like the lenses of a camera.“Get close to Agent Alexandra Danvers of the Department of Extranormal Operations.Determine her recruitment eligibility and uncover any knowledge she might have pertaining to ALFA.”

Alex scrabbled weakly at the digits cutting off her air supply, anger coursing through her body at being so thoroughly played, but Linda’s grip was tight, her eyes searching.

“You see Alex,” Siobhan was saying, sounding almost regretful, “she was never yours.We weren’t made for that kind of life.”

A brief flicker of realization entered the Linda’s pupils and she nodded slowly.

“Alex Danvers…”Recognition briefly flashed through the woman’s eyes, her voice almost puzzled. “You should have stayed in bed.”Alex choked as the grip loosened but then she was being tossed _out of a window_.

Her stomach climbed into her throat, choking off any screams she might have made.She didn’t even have time for her life to flash before her eyes; she _felt_ her back hit the cement, saw nothing but sky and then oblivion.

~*~

K-2S0 listened intently as her target turned a corner, the busy nightlife of the city thrumming with energy and excitement.Humans tended to save their happiness for the more carnal aspects of life and those tended to come out when the sun went down.She and the Banshee were standing on a rooftop overlooking one of National City’s busier streets, dressed in their tactical attire.

Looking down at her display she punched in a few commands on her wrist, her vision sharpening in the dark night and her hearing dulling.To be safe, she fit some wax into either ear before deeming herself ready for the mission at hand.

“Remember,” the Banshee said from her position on the ledge.“She wants it to be messy.We have half an hour.”

Watching as several black SUVs made their way towards them, K-2S0 nodded; she could do messy.As for the time limit… Lillian often imposed strict limits on them for testing purposes.Or for when she wanted to wipe K-2S0’s memory cortex again.

Being a faulty weapon was exhausting at times.She typed her new time limit into her display and readied herself for what was to come.

The Kryptonian didn’t even glance at her partner, trusting that Banshee knew her role well enough by now.She chose to instead drop from the ledge of the building directly into the path of the car.

Black metal crunched around her, the vehicle skidding and flipping onto it’s side as people screamed all around them.The first team out of commission, K-2S0 turned to take out the next in the line of 7 cars.Loud sonic like screams shattered store windows and sent another car hurling through the air, debris flying everywhere as people ran for cover.

This would be easier than originally planned; the humans weren’t even fighting.

Two of the SUVs reversed down the block, driving in opposite directions as they tried to escape.K-2S0 could care less, they could hardly escape her.

No one had before.

K-2S0 had just punched her hand through an engine when she heard another, impossibly louder scream pierced the night air.

Her earwax was toast.

She grimaced in pain, feeling the vessels in her ears rupture as fluid tracked down the sides of her face.Irritated eyes turned towards the newcomer, a blonde in a tight leather getup who was squared off with Banshee in a screaming contest.It was enough of a distraction that she almost didn’t notice the red blur hurtling at her from her peripherals.

Almost.

She caught the speedster by the throat, easily turning with his momentum and tossing him through a building, but then her arm was caught by a bright orange alien with flaming red hair.

A Tameranian.

Green bolts erupted from the young girl’s eyes and slammed into K-2S0’s chest making her growl with annoyance.

She did not have time for this.

The alien flew at her again, and K-2S0 waited patiently, sidestepping the attack at the last moment and slamming her elbow into the back of the teen’s neck.

The girl slammed into the asphalt, and what should have been a fatality was made into a serious injury by a weird grey girl in a blue cloak who opened the ground under her teammate and helped absorb some of the force.

Banshee slammed into her opponent, sending the blonde hurtling, even as the CADMUS operative picked up another of the black SUVs that had been unable to escape the fray and launched it at a green gorilla who was heading towards them.

This was getting ridiculous.

“Raven!”A teen in a traffic light colored costume leapt up onto a streetlight.“Get Starfire to help now!”

The blue teen reacted instantly, blinking into existence beside K-2S0 and grabbing her injured friend.K-2S0 paid them no mind, they were not the target.

They were simply in the way.

~*~

There were no comforting dreams of Kara when Alex lost consciousness this time.

No this time, there was just sharp contrast.

One second she was being tossed out of a window and the next Oliver was hauling her to her feet none to gently.

She found that odd and stared at him in amazement because: one, how had he gotten to her so quickly and two how had she survived that fall?

Shit.

Oliver had super powers.

The man in question readjusted his quiver, turning her head this way and that as he looked for injuries.

A few seconds later and her brain was working again allowing her to realize that _no_ Oliver did not have super powers.He hadn’t flown up and caught her like that gallant knight Felicity always bragged he was.There had been no reason for him to catch her even if he had had super powers.Linda hadn’t thrown her far.

She was on the tiled roof outside of Linda’s window, the slight slant precarious but not truly dangerous.

“The fuck?”She muttered, swatting Oliver’s hands away and patting herself down.No injuries.Or at least no new injuries.“The fuck happened?”

“I was hoping you could tell me that.”Oliver glanced around, dressed from head to toe in his Green Arrow get up.His fingers twitched at his sides as he kept watch for an enemy.“We heard the tail end of what happened but not enough to figure out how you landed here.”

Alex blinked at him stupidly, looking back up at Linda’s window.“Linda threw me.”

“No offense but that seems pretty impossible.”Oliver said, glancing at her as if he were afraid she was going to pass out again.“A throw from any of the windows in that apartment wouldn’t have landed you here—it would have killed you.”

“Huh?”Alex asked intelligently, still blinking her eyes slowly.

Oliver pointed up at the window she had been ejected from.“See the angle of that?No one could make a throw like that. _No one.If_ she threw you out of there… Alex she wasn’t trying to kill you.A straight throw would have seen you on the streets.”

“Are you saying I _climbed?”_ She knew her head was a ball of mush right now but she was fairly certain she wasn’t _that_ out of it.Linda had thrown her.Alex clearly remembered it.She wished very much that she didn’t.The blank disinterested look her girlfriend had given her hurt worse than her ass right now.

Oliver huffed and shook his head.“I don’t know what happened.I just know angles—trajectories.If you were thrown…Alex _whoever_ threw you out of the window wasn’t trying to kill you; they just wanted it to look like they were.”

Alex hummed, hands on her abdomen as she tried to process what Oliver was saying.It made no sense.She’d been thrown out of a window, that was a clear assassination attempt if she’d ever heard of one.Still… she inhaled slowly and tried to organize her thoughts.She started by going over the facts, the things she knew to be true. 

Linda was the RAT.

Siobhan was some sort of evil puppet master.

Linda hadn’t killed her.

Siobhan looked really horrible in black.

Linda looked really hot in black.

Focus.

Cat.

“Oliver—”

He handed her a gun, turning around and shooting an arrow down at an angle onto the opposite side of street.“I know.My bike is downstairs, zipline is quickest.”

Alex wrapped her good arm around his waist while he wrapped his around and under her shoulders, using his legs to secure his hold.Alex just tried to keep her stomach from revolting at the steep drop.The harsh wind in her face at least allowed her to wake up and feel something other than the basic functions of life.

“I need a better gun than this.”She said as soon as they touched down, the small handgun doing little to make her feel prepared.When they’d been at her apartment Linda had been shot by military grade assault rifles.She’d need that or better to take the woman down.Her shots at the RAT with the weapon in her hand had done nothing but annoy the blonde.“Please tell me your packing.”

Oliver frowned but moved over to a car parked next to his bike.He opened the trunk and pulled out a bag.“Felicity said this was only for emergencies.”

Then he presented Alex with a glorious masterpiece of a gun that almost had her weeping.

When she realized her arm was still shot she nearly did anyway.Oliver saw her look and reached into his own equipment bag pulling out a syringe.

“What is that?”Alex asked but made no move to step away from him.

“Lidocaine.Trust me, it will help.”

Alex allowed the injection, slightly concerned that he was using _all of it,_ but trusting him all the same. The needle stung in her shoulder but the rest of the pain faded away to the back of her mind. The physical pain at least.The emotional pain was another thing all together.It had crept up on her slowly; the pain from the fall and disorientation of waking up on a roof having pushed Linda’s actions to the back of her mind.But now… now that she was fully aware of what had transpired… She’d never felt so stupid in her entire life.So betrayed.

Linda had asked Alex to trust her; had shown her all the amazingly charming and sexy facets of her personality.It had all been a set up.Linda had admitted as much right before she’d tossed her into the sky.Alex had been nothing more than a mission; a means to an end.A way to bide her time while they plotted against Cat Grant.

And Alex had stupidly fallen for it.Had professed her love for someone— _something_ that could never love her back.

The inner torment increased as her arm came to life and it gave her something to channel that pain into; it allowed her to focus on her steadily growing anger.

Linda had lied to her.

Had _played_ her like a fucking fool.

Had tossed her out of a fucking _window._

Mindless cyborg or no, Alex was going to have _words_ with her girlfriend.

Ex-girlfriend.

Trying to kill your partner was probably grounds for breakup in anyone’s book.

She flexed the fingers of her injured hand, pulling the sling over her shoulder and dropping it to the floor.Alex tested the weight of her weapon next, trying out the sights and safety to make sure she could handle it.She _did_ at least switch gun arms, for once grateful that Oliver had made her learn both sides.Satisfied she nodded at her friend.

“Let’s go.”

~*~

Banshee was locked in a fist fight with the green ape, which left K-2S0 with a human teen, a robot and the speedster that she could hear running back towards her.

It was well passed time for this to end.

Inhaling deeply, she let a frigid breath loose on the Cyborg, freezing him in place as his companion launched several hand grenades at her.She caught them and threw them back, watching the boy bob and weave to avoid the explosives but not quickly enough to avoid them all.

He went down by his own weapon, his cybernetic friend finally blasting out of his icy prison as the red guy flashed back over to the fight.K-2S0 shot the robot with her heat vision, speeding over to him and punching him into the green t-rex.She slammed both parties into the building next to them, destroying its structural foundations and watching as they scrabbled to find a way to keep the thing from collapsing.

Behind her Banshee shrieked at the red man, his speed slowing at her high vibrational scream and allowing Kara to speed over to him and punch him solidly in the face.

She glanced at her partner, uncaring of the damage they had caused before they both launched themselves into the air, taking off after Cat Grant.

K-2S0’s superior hearing led them directly to her fleeing vehicle that was hurtling at tremendous speeds across the Linda Carter bridge.The two operatives increased their flying speed, waiting until they were directly above the vehicle before K-2S0 crashed through the roof and down to the floor.The vehicle’s momentum against K-2S0’s impenetrable body slicing the metal in half.

A blue blur slammed into her, knocking her head to the side as a fist slammed into her cheek.The Kryptonian actually stumbled, hands moving to catch her balance as she glared at the newcomer from her now naked face; her Fukumen ripped in half at the impact.

The man of steel reeled back for another punch but stopped when he got a good look at her.

“Linda?”

She scowled, feeling irritation lance through her body at the blow he had just dealt her, ripping the material the rest of the way off.Who the fuck was Linda?

She didn’t have _time_ for this!

Feeling beyond pissed off, she let her heat vision loose on the suspension rigging holding the bridge up and then almost petulantly stomped her foot.

The whole floor cracked, the bridge groaning as the man in blue’s eyes widened.

“What did you do?”He screamed, alarmed for some reason at her actions.“What are you doing?”

“Faster pussy cat.”Banshee hissed from her side.She was always the mouthier one.

Cars slid into the breach K-2S0 had fashioned, people desperately trying to escape a watery death as their tires squealed against concrete.

The man looked between them and the people in need before urgently turning to catch a car that had plummeted off the side.

More suspension cables snapped, and more people screamed.Lillian had wanted messy and she had gotten it.Turning away from the scene, K-2S0 walked back over to Cat’s vehicle.

The CEO was still strapped into her seat, the side of her face painted in blood and her chest heaving as she tried to breathe.

It could have been the fear… or the piece of door that was crushing her upper torso.K-2S0 wasn’t in the business of caring either way.

To her credit, the CEO didn’t look very afraid, more… resigned.

“I expected more from you Linda.” She wheezed, squinting slightly as she bled out.“You won’t win, I’ve already—”

Two beams of blue light slammed into her chest, K-2S0’s heat vision killing her near instantly just as the display in her eye read that her time was up.

She’d made her deadline.

Time to report back to Lillian.

“Linda!”The name wasn’t what stopped her, made her pause in her tracks.It was something else, something… visceral.K-2S0 turned to look at the woman standing behind her holding a gun aimed steadily at her head.Not just any gun either, a high caliber rifle designed specifically to be armor piercing.K-2S0 was almost impressed; such a weapon could actually cause a tickle if the woman had managed to land a hit.Reddish brown hair lifted as the breeze from the sound carried over to them and K-2S0 finally recognized her adversary as the woman from before… Alex.“Don’t move.”

Behind her a man in green was shooting arrows that turned into wire rigging to keep cars from sliding down the bridge.Despite the chaos, Alex had eyes only for her.

The Kryptonian stared at her, feeling something stir in her chest at the pure agony written across the woman’s features.She took half a step towards her before Banshee was gripping her arm.

“We don’t have time for this.We have to go.”

Alex’s grip tightened on her gun and K-2S0 frowned.Why did this woman have this effect on her?

She couldn’t dwell on it now, she turned her back to Alex and took off, Banshee beside her.Below her Alex let out a scream of rage, frustration, and… absolute loss.

For some reason, K-2S0 felt the emotions mirrored in her own chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so... in my defense I told you guys we were going down hill. I mean I warned you multiple times. Like all the times.
> 
> That being said... I'm still sorry.
> 
> So let's jump in the deep end shall we?
> 
> For all of you schnookums who guessed Kara saved Alex, Maggie, and Wren. Two points for you Glen Coco, you go Glen Coco.
> 
> Of Course I was gonna have my sweetie pie save them! I just had to up the stakes a little. 
> 
> Btw I have no idea if a Kryptonian defribbilator would work in real life but wouldn't it be cool if it did? I mean technically Barry has done something similar and Diana called lightning from the sky cause she's a goddess or whatever. Kara can totally use her hands to zap somebody's heart.
> 
> Side note: If there is no heart activity at all you can't actually zap it back to life. Common misnomer. It needs to have some sort of fibriallation (at least from what I remember from my short stint as a med student). ERGO, Maggie's heart was miraculously still active. For any Sanvers fans... she held on.
> 
> Cue melting.
> 
> And Kara was a BAMF saving everyone wilst her brain exploded and healed, and exploded and healed. Get em girl.
> 
> The downside: saving her friends meant disobeying Lillian and now our love will face the consequences.
> 
> Mon-El was no help; she's cut off from the camp; Alex is injured and pissed...
> 
> What ever shall she do?
> 
> #nospoilers
> 
> At least she finally told Alex to get her shit together huh? No one puts Kara in a corner. Still she should have come clean; maybe then Siobhan would have failed...  
> Probably not but we can dream huh?
> 
> When Kara was calming Alex down and Alex was like, how did you do that? In my head, Kara's movements were an old Kryptonian technique similar to accupressure where hitting certain pressure points calms you down.
> 
> Also, the scene where Siobhan is saying those random names? Totally Winter Soldier but in my head I was seeing something else... you ever see a movie in your head but you have no idea where it's from? Yeah that's what happened here so thank you movie that will never be known... Anyway the names were also not random, it was more star wars references, an Angel reference even though I hate him and I think I put in some Dr. Who. And, Siobhan is maybe not evil?
> 
> Review of Maggie:  
> She is technically not dead so anyone who is holding out hope for her... yay? Not really, sorry guys. Cerebral Hypoxia basically happens when the brain doesn't get enough oxygen. In my head Maggie got shot right? So already, blood loss equals lack of oxygen. The gunshot in and of itself wouldn't have killed her had they managed to get street level on time. However that did not happen; instead she was crushed under tons of sewer water. That means she was probably cut off from a steady oxygen source for at least a minute. More than enough time for her brain stem to just go kaput. Hence dear readers, Maggie is essentially brain dead.
> 
> When a person is declared brain dead or even compromised doctor's must address their care plan. In this case, Alex alludes to the fact that she helped all of her friends set up their end of life care instructions. This is probably due to her expecting everyone she cares about to leave or die but that's not important right now. What is important is that Alex states that Maggie instructed she be left on life support for at least 90 days. That is 3 months...
> 
> Discuss.
> 
> And yeah... Kara totally lasered Cat Grant to death. She was incinerated from the inside out. Barbecued. Burnt to a crisp...
> 
> Discuss.
> 
> And the lady facing off against Banshee was obviously the Black Canary. In this world, she must be Dinah because Laurel is kind of evil. SO Dinah came to help out with the Flash and the Titans. I refuse to have anything to do with WildDog or whatever he calls himself. Love the actor but the character makes me want to punch things. Namely his face.
> 
> Now that I think about it, this would have been a good place to put Guardian but... nah.
> 
> Did you guys see the contrast between Kara and K-2S0? I actually just went with K-2S0 to remind myself that the character I was writing was not Kara. Very tricky keeping up with all of these names.
> 
> And thus ends this chapter. I'm actually super excited to hear your thoughts so please comment. Next chapter is going to be interesting, and then the end.... oh boy. It's a doozie.
> 
> Thanks for staying around this long, you guys are awesome.
> 
> ~Chronicles


	19. All I Need is You (come please, I'm callin)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Holy crap guys, I finished responding to everybody's comments.
> 
> There were a lot!
> 
> It was like a marathon.
> 
> Also... I finished writing the story... I;ve been on the last chapter for like a month just twiddling my thumbs but dammit I buckled down this weekend and it is written. Just the epilogue left. 0.0
> 
> I also got a new kitten and a new job and just newness abound sooo yay!
> 
> Anyway, this chapter puts us back in CADMUS so there are some graphic scenes coming up but other than that, I think we're good to move forward.
> 
> Song is Savin Me by Nickelback and listen here ok-- their lyrics just really resonate with the story is all!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter:
> 
> Kara and Siobhan forged a sort of truce and then attacked Brainiac.
> 
> Brainiac told Kara Alex was in danger, and like the worried lesbian girlfriend she is, she dropped everything and went off to save her top.
> 
> Alex and Maggie were pulled from under Scotland's bar and saved by Kara.
> 
> Wren was taken to Mon-El for transportation to the alien community.
> 
> Alex woke up and learned Maggie was brain dead. Felicity came to help and took her to Linda's.
> 
> Alex and Linda duked it out, there were tears, confessions, and words of wisdom.
> 
> And then Siobhan came back like a fucking wack a mole and turned Kara into K-2S0.
> 
> Alex tried to talk to her and got thrown out of a window.
> 
> K-2S0 and Siobhan took on the Titans and team Arrow and Superman and still managed to kill Cat Grant...
> 
> and there we pick up...

** All I Need is You (come please, I'm callin') **

_“Special Agent Danvers, all due respect but I’ve read your file.This kind of behavior is hardly outside the scope of probability.You’re brilliant but reckless, seemingly only to be concerned with your own self interests.That’s not the code our government was built on.”_

_Lucy stood, hands clasped in front of her as she took in the panel.“All due respect to you sir, but Agent Danvers’ file is not what is one trial.The crimes she’s been accused of are fabricated and—”_

_“Fabricated?Major Lane are you aware of the happenings that took place the night in question? Outbound radio transmission was cut off but our people heard every word of what happened down there.Agent Danvers was conspiring with her father Jeremiah Danvers, a rogue player and probable ALFA affiliate.”_

_“That is conjecture sir.”_

_“It will stand as fact unless you can prove otherwise Major.”_

“Alex?!Honey?”Eliza’s voice carried through the stone hallway but only served to make Alex hunch lower in her cell, the sound of the steel bars being pulled back enough to make her want to puke.Eliza’s hands on her face, touching her cheeks and pushing her hair back… it was all too much.She just needed a second—just a fucking second to _think._ It felt like she’d been on a constant roller coaster since she’d left that restaurant with Maggie… two days ago now?Shit.She’d lost track of time.Not like it mattered now, she’d been arrested as soon as the police had shown up on scene, stupidly believing her FBI credentials would keep her out of jail like always.She should have known she was the fall guy.“Don’t worry honey.I spoke to Lucy and—”

“Why didn’t you tell me Dad was alive?”

Alex kept her voice quiet, the deadly quality coming through all on its own as she tried to control the hate filled rage that had been coursing through her for the better part of 36 hours.

Eliza’s mouth opened and closed like a fish, the worry in her eyes intensifying with the confusion that appeared.“What?Alex—”

“Don’t mom.Don’t do that.Tell me the truth.”

“Ok.”Eliza swallowed, staring into her daughter’s hazel eyes and pursing her lips in pain.“Ok.I—honey he just wasn’t the same.I didn’t lie to you, that _thing_ that they tried to send back to us… that was _not_ your father.It might look like him and sound like him but—”

“But I had a right to know.”Alex interrupted, nodding her head as Eliza shook hers.Her lips pursed and she leaned forward, her eyes narrowing.“I had a right to know.”

Eliza bit her lip, looking away for a moment before steeling herself.“I was trying to protect you.”

Alex nodded again, leaning back into the mattress, her eyes dropping as she pulled away from her mother.“Word to the wise mom.Protecting people?That kind of selflessness will only ruin your life.Try not to do it again ok?”

“Alex—”

“I don’t wanna talk anymore.”Alex whispered, moving away completely and rolling into her bunk.

“Alex.”

“Goodbye Mom.”

“ _Given the evidence submitted by the prosecution we are forced to believe that your previous actions and deeds were all practice for executing such abhorrent actions as those you stand accused of.For years you have worked with the alien threat, and now you have befriended them.”_

_“Sirs, if I may, I’ve worked with Agent Danvers on multiple occasions.There is no way she could be guilty of the crimes she stands charged with.”Clark stood tall in his Superman uniform, his body strong as he placed himself between Alex and a life sentence._

_The youngest general on the panel glared at him.“You should count yourself lucky that we are not putting you on trial sir.”_

_Clark’s face remained impassive, but Alex had known him long enough to read his shock.“I hardly see how you could think that I—”_

_“That thing on the bridge was one of your people; it was your responsibility and you let it get away.The strongest being in the Universe and you expect us to believe you were beaten?”_

_“Those people would have died.”Clark replied, his body turning into the steel his name implied, jaw clenched and fists tight at his sides._

_“Maybe, but whatever nefarious plot is unfolding would not be taking place.”_

Alex sat stiffly on the wooden bench in the hallway of the courthouse.Her hearing had come and gone, witnesses and evidence presented and deliberated on.The words of her council rang in her ears even now.

She tried not to let it get to her.

There was little else to be done but wait.

Catherine Grant was dead.

Hundreds of cops had lost their lives.

National City had suffered extreme physical damage.

Someone had to go down for that.

Noise to her right had her clenching her jaw, but she refused to look anywhere but at the wall opposite her.Hank didn’t seem to mind.He sat slowly next to her, his legs spread and hands clasped as he braced his elbows on his knees.

They sat like that for some time.

Alex had all the time in the world now.

“I shouldn’t have listened to you.”She finally uttered, body still alert but not tense.She wasn’t prepping for a fight.She had no more fight in her.“When you said that I should be more like everyone else.Me trying to be more like everyone else got a lot of people killed.”

Hank sighed heavily.“That wasn’t your fault Alex.”

“No,” Alex agreed, turning her head to face him finally.“It was yours.”

Hank said nothing, and after studying his profile for another moment she went back to looking at the wall.Her vision was blurry this time around.

“I loved her.I know you don’t approve of that but I did.”She swallowed, trying her best to keep her voice even.To say her piece now while she had a chance.“She was… I loved her.I wanted a life with her.You were right to try to keep me from feeling that.”

“That was never my intention.”Hank argued, his head rising from where he had been looking at the floor.“I wanted nothing but happiness for you.If you had truly found love I would have been nothing but supportive.Me telling you to slow down?To think through your actions?”His voice turned gruff and he took a moment before continuing, his eyes looking somewhere past her shoulder.“I was only scared of losing you.I was trying to keep you around for just—just a little longer.”

A hot tear trekked down her face at his words and she inhaled deeply to steady herself.“Well…” She started, raising her cuffed hands for his perusal, “looks like that didn’t work out for either of us huh?”

She closed her eyes when Hank went to wipe her cheeks.“This isn’t over yet Alex.Lucy Lane is a damn good lawyer.She’s doing everything she can.”

“She can’t fix this.”

“Alex—”

“I was set up J’onn.”The use of his real name gave him pause and he dropped his hand back to his side.“She can’t fix this.Treason is a life sentence.It’s over.”

He faced forward again, hands re-clasping and jaw working as he stared straight ahead.Alex exhaled shakily and scooted a little closer, pressing her forehead to his shoulder for a moment.

“Thank you… for trusting me.It’s one less life on my hands.”She sniffled, and forced the next words passed the lump in her throat.“I didn’t mean what I said before.I don’t blame you.”

“I know.”Hank said, leaning his head on hers for a moment.

She nodded, clenching her eyes before forcibly moving back to her original position.“This thing with ALFA isn’t over either.Keep your eyes open.Talk to Overwatch.”

He nodded just as the doors to the courtroom opened and the guard who had been waiting at the hallways only exit stepped up to escort her back in.

“ _You’re desire for the world to believe that you hold any animosity towards aliens has proven to be a cover given your relationship with the alien operative.The circumstances surrounding the events in question make you a very real suspect Special Agent, do you understand that?”_

_Lucy bristled.“What we are beginning to understand sirs, is that you refuse to give us a fair hearing.Agent Danvers has submitted multiple pieces of evidence refuting—”_

_“These are circumstantial at best Major—”_

_“Refuting!” Lucy continued, eyes blazing with her ire.“the allegations held against her and you have shot down every one without cause.If you want to play to your puppet master than fine but I will not allow this to die.You will see me again and again until we are heard fairly and without prejudice.”_

There wasn’t much fanfare after her talk with Hank.She was frog marched passed the double doors to stand in front of a room of old white men… and one white woman.

They were all uniforms and they all held stern expressions as they handed down their verdict.In the end it was General Sam Lane who actually spoke the words, his expression almost smug as he decided Alex’s future.

“We find the defendant Alexandra Danvers guilty of treason against the United States of America.”The room erupted in shouts as Alex’s friends and family realized she wouldn’t be going home; that she’d never be going home.“The defendant is thus also guilty as an accessory to acts of terrorism; as an accessory to homicide on 113 counts; as an accessory to assault on 67 counts; as an accessory to property damage totaling more than 15 million dollars; and for aiding and abetting a known terrorist.”Alex could hear her mother crying but kept her face unyielding as they continued to hand out her sentence.“You are henceforth stripped of your title and ranking within the United States Intelligence Agency and sentenced to 2 consecutive life terms with no chance of parole.”

Lucy was turning to her even as the guard grabbed her arm.“We’ll appeal this Danvers.Don’t give up on me ok?We’re going to fight this.”

“Take care of my mom.”Alex said as she was led away.

She did not look at the crowd, she did not look at the prosecutor.

There was no point.She’d tried something new and she’d gotten screwed.That was life.

No use crying about it now.

_~*~_

It was cold.

It was very very cold.

But it didn’t hurt anymore, a small voice whispered to her.That was good right?

Kara thought so… she was very sleepy anyway.

Something dug into the back of her head, yanking harshly and then she was hitting burning hot tile with a harsh smack.

She yelped, trying and failing to lift her naked body away from the heat, the hand on the back of her head ensuring that she stayed on the floor, her cheek smushing into the surface.

Sobs came again, hard and heavy and she was wholly unprepared to stop them.

That is until a boot came into her vision moments before pain erupted through her face.She blinked harshly, her breath stuck in her throat as she tried to regain her bearings.The boot came again and she tasted iron before being pulled up by her hair and dunked back into the ice-cold water.A steel grip kept her under until she started to lose consciousness and then yanked her back out again.A sharp hissing sound came from the floor as she gasped and choked, her body fighting to keep its basic functions going.

“Enough.”

Lillian’s voice sounded from somewhere in front of her and she felt herself cower, ducking her head and hiding behind her hair.Soft fingers stroked through the blonde strands and tilted her chin up.“Are you ready to talk now?”

Kara could only whimper in response, her vision going in and out as she tried to focus on the face in front of her.

Lillian hummed, her touch gentle where her cyborg’s had been cruel.

“Tell me K-2S0, who gave you this necklace?”She glanced down at the jewel around Kara’s neck.An earlier attempt to remove it had resulted in an extremely powerful electrical surge.“All I need is a name, and then I’ll stop.”She stroked the pads of her fingers over Kara’s bruised cheek, the faint glow from the kryptonite illuminating her skin in green.“I promise, it will all be over after that.”

Kara licked cracked and bleeding lips, knowing intrinsically that Lillian meant that literally.They had taken her straight to the Kitchens when she’d arrived back, an experience that she was not wont to repeat.

The Kitchen was little more than a glorified butcher shop that CADMUS operated.It was how Lillian got the parts for her new projects.She’d let her “doctors” loose on her captives and they’d take whatever they thought was useful.It’s how Kara had lost her arm… and her eye.

This time they’d tried cutting her from chest to pelvis, their intent to remove all of her vital organs and preserve them for future purposes.The first doctor had simply collapsed when he’d gone to make the cut.The second had quite literally been flung across the room.No one had been able to touch her.

No one but Hank Henshaw.

The dark man glared at her from over Lillian’s shoulder, _her_ eye holstered in a metal cage over _his_ eye socket.Apparently, he had lost his in a fight with an alien and Lillian had promised him revenge.He liked showing off his borrowed appendage whenever he was tasked with disciplining Kara.

Hank Henshaw was a cruel man and he liked to torture his victims, not kill them.His new eye and cybernetic parts had given him the ability to take that torture to new lengths.

At least until now.

Now he hadn’t been able to use his heat vision.In fact, he’d only been able to use his cybernetic body parts to hurt her, not to kill her.

Every time he came close, his arms would lock up and he’d be forced to reverse whatever harm he was doing.

When Alex had told her that the necklace would protect her from any who would want to harm her, she hadn’t thought she’d meant it quite so literally.And sure, it might not be keeping her from getting hurt but… they couldn’t kill her.

As long as Henshaw only wanted to beat her— _humiliate her—_ then he could do whatever he wanted.The moment his intentions shifted he was blocked by some unseen force.

Alex was protecting her even now.

She swallowed harshly at the thought of her girlfriend, of what she must think of her.Kara wondered if she’d gotten her letter, if maybe she understood, if there was any chance at all that she didn’t hate her.She doubted it but even so, there was no way she would give them Alex’s name.

It would only give them more incentive to go after her.

She’d die before she let them hurt the woman she loved.

When Kara had become aware of herself again, she’d already been back at CADMUS.The words that Siobhan had spoken, activating her original programming.It was the purest and most powerful, shutting down every ounce of her consciousness and allowing only K-2S0 to remain.She was little more than a weapon in that form.It was what Lillian wanted of her always.However, the affects only lasted for about an hour before she began to ‘wakeup’ so to speak.Lillian rarely used it as it was much harder to control Kara in that from if she lost control of her temper.The last time Kara had gotten angry like that she’d kind of …broken Taiwan.

The protocol was Lillian’s last resort.

Sometimes Kara preferred it because it meant her memory stayed in tact after the effects wore off; the method more of a mind control than a memory wipe.

Most times Kara hated it because it meant her memories stayed intact.

She’d remembered everything she’d done as K-2S0 and had hated herself within seconds.

She’d killed Cat.

Had put countless people at risk.

She’d thrown Alex out of a window.

There was no forgiveness waiting for her in National City; her daughter’s only hope was if Felicity managed to decode that thumb drive.As much as her previous friends might hate her, they wouldn’t turn their backs on innocent people.

They’d proven that _they_ at least were good people.

Kara was nothing more than a monster.

Lillian hummed again, taking in the defiance in Kara’s eyes before sighing and standing up.“Go again.”She ordered.

It was somewhere near the 5th round of questioning that Kara realized how angry and frustrated Lillian was getting.She wasn’t used to this.Wasn’t used to being denied what she wanted.The thought made Kara smile… and then laugh.Lillian wanted what was in her brain; what was in her body.The abhorrent woman needed to know how to get the necklace off of her so that she could pick her apart piece by piece.Without that, she could only threaten and hurt like a child throwing a tantrum.

Lillian backhanded her, Kara’s head snapping to the side with the aid of the Kryptonite.She only laughed harder, the sounds turning into choking breaths when the Cyborg stepped in and started strangling her.

It was fine.

She was used to the treatment.

_They had made her used to this kind of treatment._

They had trained her to withstand _them._

This was the most beautiful form of irony she’d ever heard of.

She choked some more, trying to force her words past the fingers cutting her air off.Lillian nodded at Henshaw and he released her, her flesh burning against the heated stones.

“What was that K-2S0?Ready to talk now?”

Kara nodded and was hauled upright so that Lillian could see her face.

“You…” she tried, before a coughing fit hit her abused windpipe.Kara licked bloody lips, fighting the smile that wanted to come to her face.“You have… no power over me.”

And then she was laughing again.The first movie that Alex had ever shown her replaying in her head.Although Lillian was hardly anybody’s Jareth, the line still fit.It was actually pretty perfect.They’d done everything they could to break her; control her, and she was still here.

_She was still here_.

She knew what friendship really was now; knew what love was.She’d had _sex._ She’d built a family.

Whatever happened after this, she’d had all of that.Lillian hadn’t wiped her yet which probably meant that she _couldn’t_ and there was no way in hell Kara was going to give her the means to.Lillian Luthor could rot in hell for all she cared.Kara had lived there her whole life... she was pretty comfortable now.

Maybe she could show Lillian around… trip her down a flight of stairs.

“Go again.”Lillian hissed, stepping away from the giggling Kryptonian and moving to walk out of the room.“And when you’re done, leave her.No water or rations for a month.”

Kara threw her arms up just in time to catch the blow to her face and heard her wrist snap.She could manage little more than a sharp gasp, her scalp screaming in protest as she was yanked up once again and dunked into the frigid water.

~*~

**_28 days later_ **

_“I see you driving round town with the girl I love and I’m like fuck you.”_ Alex pulled herself up on the pullup bar, singing along to the music coming from the sound dock by her bed. “ _I guess the change in my pocket wasn’t enough and I’m like fuck you and uh Fuck her too.”_

Sweat dripped down her face and she grit her teeth as she finished her last set, dropping lightly to her feet and sighing as she began to stretch out her sore muscles.

Toni Braxton’s Unbreak My Heart came on and she started humming along to that as she moved into a wall squat.

Exercising was good.It helped keep her head clear.Kept her from wanting to murder everyone around her.

When she had first arrived, she’d spent a good two days screaming into her pillow and cursing anyone who so much as looked at her.

After she’d had a few days to calm down, the sheer boredom of her isolation had sent her regressing back to old habits.

Thinking and over analyzing.

She didn’t dwell too long on the how part.

She knew how she had gotten here.

Linda, and whatever group she was working for, had set her up.

That was a pretty clear how.

Alex just hadn’t understood why.

They’d been happy.At least she’d thought they had.

Thinking about the why had sent her through a cycle of analyzing every interaction; every word, every touch.

There’d been nothing to suggest that _Alex_ should be worried.At least not for herself.

Feeling herself getting overwhelmed she’d instead turned her focus to things she could do. Like ALFA. Like work on saving Maggie.

It had been easy to get favors in prison; Alex was well connected with the Sirens, Batman, Superman, and team Arrow.

She was best friends with two extremely wealthy females for crying out loud.

There was little she couldn’t get.

She’d spent 4 days setting up her new equipment and another few hours reading through her notes.

She would have spent more time on her notes but then she had stumbled across the loopy scrawl of one Linda Taylor.The writing stretched across more than one page, filling every inch of space possible with formulas and theories.

And inked into a corner was the name _Kara Zor-El Danvers._

The words had brought her up short.

They’d brought her up short because the only other person who had had access to Alex’s notebook was Linda.

There was no way Kara herself could have written this.

Not in this book.

Alex had pored over this notebook for _years._ She would have seen it.

Linda had been the one to write in here.

Alex vividly remembered her soft voice teasing about lock picking being a bigger offender of personal space than notebook stealing.

She’d looked so beautiful that day.

And Alex had stopped being annoyed that she had gone through her things.

But if Linda had written this, that meant…

Linda couldn’t be Kara.

It was impossible.

But…

Linda was _Kara?_

There was no way she would have known that name otherwise.

And suddenly, upon that realization, all the pieces started falling in place.

The brown eyes that had always been beautiful but had seemed slightly off.They had been contacts, the blue that Alex had seen that last day a testament to their true coloring.

Her alien side; she hadn’t been able to say her species, but she’d displayed super strength, flight, speed, hell _she’d used heat vision._

_She’d made Alex a lightsaber._

Had painted her mom and picture of the whole Danvers clan.How would she have even known what their house looked like?Alex didn’t have any pictures and she doubted that Eliza had coughed one up for the time it would have taken Linda to paint that image.

The memory loss.

The lack of pop culture knowledge.

The _obsession_ with pizza.

_I love you Alex; no matter what happens please never doubt that._

She’d tried telling her.

She’d done everything she could to prove her love, to show Alex who she truly was…

And what had Alex done in turn?

_She hadn’t been paying attention._

And so, she’d been faced with a choice.ALFA was still out there; Alex was surer of that than ever before.Maggie was still in a coma; brain dead and running out of time.And Linda was…Alex didn’t know.

She’d spent the past ten years failing at being Kara’s hero.She figured one more try wouldn’t hurt.

Linda would have scolded her; she would have told Alex that she wasn’t her responsibility, that any perceived failure was pure imagination on Alex’s part.A few weeks of therapy mixed with Linda’s love and her friend’s ever-present support…Alex was finally starting to understand that maybe she was right.Alex had been a child when Kara was taken; of everyone involved she had held the least responsibility.Her ‘mission’ to rescue Kara was self-imposed and her lack of help had been her own choice as well.She’d taken on the weight of the world and lashed out at anyone who had tried to help her.Was it any wonder that everything had fallen down around her?

Kara had made her choices.

_Linda_ had made her choices.

Alex was not responsible for those choices; she wasn’t even responsible for the women involved.What she was responsible for were her own choices… and it was high time she started making better ones.

Her theory might be false and she might be setting herself up for a massive heartbreak but… she was choosing Linda.Even if she wasn’t Kara; if there was even a hint that what they had shared was real… Alex couldn’t just abandon her.And if she _was_ Kara…

That night… at the alien club… Alex had been so sure she had gotten herself out of trouble but now… niggling in the back of her mind was an image of Linda squeezing someone’s face, her eyes glowing blue.And then later, ‘ _I would just really like a right now.’_ So many signs that she had missed.All this time… 

Alex had used the rest of her time to plan.

She was going to need all the time she could get.

There was still a lot she didn’t know; a lot she had to do but she had the basics.

Kara might—re: certainly—be Linda.

Linda was the RAT.

Linda _loved_ her.

Alex could figure the rest out later.

Like how the hell Kara had gotten placed in National City and how she hadn’t recognized Alex.Was her name supposed to be a clue of some sort?

A banging knock on the metal of her cell door almost had her falling to her ass and she scowled as her guard poked their head in.

“You done moping around yet Danvers?”The tall black woman asked, her hair pulled back into a tight knot.“Or should I get you some Kelly Clarkson in here?Maybe some Britney Spears?”

Alex rose from her squat, shaking out her legs and glancing at the woman as she tried to figure out why she was here.“I would love a good Celine Dion record, but the warden insists on CD.You can’t play Celine on a CD.It’s blasphemous.”

The guard shook her head.“I still don’t understand how you got all this shit in here anyway.”She said as she gestured to Alex’s tech’ed out room.“This is white privilege on a whole other level.”

“Ah don’t be sore Noelle, if I remember correctly my white privilege managed to get your cousin that government job he wanted.”Alex pulled a towel from her lazy boy, smiling as she dabbed at her sweaty face.“Besides, you know I’m your favorite white girl.”

“Well you’re certainly better than the one that just showed up asking for you.”Noelle sighed, leaning against the doorway.“Be careful with this one, she looks like Cruella DeVille had a child with Dorian Grey and they raised it in hell.”

Alex raised her eyebrows.“Very descriptive.Who do we have as a sharp shooter?”

“Diaz.”Noelle said, allowing Alex to pass her into the hall.“We’ve got your back.”

Alex hummed her agreement and was silent for the rest of the way as Noelle led her to the cafeteria.Another odd occurrence.Visitors were never seen in the cafeteria.Alex doubted that had anything to do with her connections and a lot to do with the woman’s.

Lillian Luthor to be exact.

The woman smiled arrogantly as Alex sat down in front of her.“Agent Danvers.”

Alex smirked, her lips twitching to the side.“I’m afraid you have the wrong woman ma’am.I don’t believe such a person exists anymore.”

“But she could again.”Lillian said, leaning forward on folded arms.“I’ve been watching you Agent Danvers, you seem to have an… interesting skill set.”She sat back, reaching to a bag she had on the floor and pulling out a folder.“These are your research papers.Riveting… for a college student.I’m interested to see what your mind could do with unlimited resources and full government funding.”

Alex hummed, looking down at her thesis for her doctorate.“Well, my mind is pretty pissy these days.Betrayal and all that.Can’t see it being much help to you ma’am.Especially with me being in prison and all.”

“You are only in here because of an alien menace.”Lillian asserted, pushing the stack of papers closer to Alex.Her eyes flashing in the fluorescent lights even as Alex fought to keep her face even.“You were betrayed by someone you thought was a friend.My son experienced the same fate.With your help, I hope to alleviate the threat and make sure no one suffers at the hands of these intruders again.”

Alex felt her blood boil, but as was usual since she got thrown off a balcony, she was unsure of who she was most angry with.

She missed Linda fiercely; her body aching when she went to sleep at night with the memory of the woman resting on top of her.The love she felt for the blonde wasn’t just going to die an easy death.Even if she was wrong and she had just been a mission to this version of Kara… just because Kara’s feelings weren’t real didn’t mean Alex’s weren’t.

Still for the time being Alex couldn’t allow herself to show how enamored she was by a rogue alien threat; whether Linda wanted to be an alien threat… that remained to be seen.Alex could hardly decipher such a thing behind bars.Her mind, given all the information she’d readdressed in her month in prison, told her firmly that she had been played.That Linda, K-2S0, had been sent to her as little more than a mission assignment.Alex had been a means to an end; nothing more.

Her heart, the annoyingly loud voice that sounded so much like Kara, told her otherwise.It told her that Linda had loved her, had begged her to never doubt her feelings; that Linda—that _Kara_ had done everything in her power to prove her love.

And then there was Alex herself, her own rage undeniably aimed internally.Though whether that was for allowing herself to be played; or for not being able to save Kara she had yet to determine.

So, she was uncertain about her anger.

But… she did like options.

“This all sounds fascinating Ms. Luthor, but I ask again: what do you want me to do from a prison cell?”

Lillian smirked. “You help me; you join my team and I have been given the power to grant you a full pardon.You’ll have your life back Agent Danvers; a chance at normalcy.Revenge.It’s more than the DEO has been able to do for you.”

Which was true.Despite multiple attempts Lucy had been unable to get her appeal heard in court.Nothing she had done had held any sort of power and, while Alex had not been pleased, she had hardly been resting on her laurels.There was obviously a much higher power working against them.And Alex was pretty sure it was the higher power sitting in front of her right now.

Of course, ALFA was still on the board, their plot for world domination still very much active.If Felicity and Winn were to be believed—and when were they not to be believed—then ALFA was going to strike in a matter of weeks, possibly days.

Alex had almost given up hope on being able to stop them.

Until now.

Lillian was offering her everything she had ever wanted.

“What’s the catch?”She asked, because even if this had been her plan all along; to get an invite into CADMUS and find Kara, she wasn’t an idiot.She wouldn’t just agree to anything.

“You’ll be contracted to CADMUS for a 15-year term.Anything you make; any scientific research will belong to my team.It’s a small price to pay for your freedom.”

It was.

Especially as Alex planned on shoving Lillian’s smile down her throat and burning CADMUS to the ground as soon as she had Kara in her possession.She’d go underground after that and the matter of who owned her research would hardly matter.

She still pretended to mull the idea over, waiting until she saw Lillian’s face start to tense before holding out her hand.“Deal.”

The blonde’s smile returned, her own hand delicate and loose in Alex’s grip.“Welcome to CADMUS Agent Danvers.”

~*~

It was morning when footsteps sounded outside her cell.Kara knew because Katu sent the information to her head.She herself, was barely coherent enough to realize she was laying down let alone know the time of day.Katu tried to alleviate the delirium with stories and making her keep track of time but Kara was finding it harder and harder to care.

Something in Katu’s morning message made her care now.

The guards were coming and while that in itself was not new, the anger that accompanied Katu’s presence in her mind was.

Katu very rarely got angry.Annoyed, often.Maybe even frustrated.But she usually reserved her anger for one person.

Kara’s vision was blurry as she looked out the glass wall, and she had to blink repeatedly to clear it.Rough hands on either arm hauled her to her feet and she had to fight to stay upright.

Kryptonians were fairly resilient people.At full strength, in the sun, Kara could probably last months without sustenance.Without direct access to any sunlight and with Hank Henshaw pummeling her face in every other day… that time shortened greatly.

Her body couldn’t heal itself without any fuel, but the trigger to heal was an involuntary mechanism that kicked in when needed.Her healing abilities were essentially killing her.Kara couldn’t control it.So, she burned fuel she didn’t have and waited for an opportunity.Any opportunity.

Katu had told her once that as long as she was breathing she should have hope.Alex had made her believe that too.Maybe it was time she made herself believe it.

She swallowed, the motion causing her throat to spasm as the dry muscles moved against each other.In front of her stood Lillian Luthor, dressed as usual in a smart woman’s suit complete with tailored skirt.Her green eyes were as cold and calculating as they always were and they made Kara want to commit very evil acts.

“Pathetic.”The woman muttered, looking at Kara disdainfully.“You could have been great K-2S0, but you chose weakness.Bind it.”

Kara bared her teeth, but it was a lethargic move and the guards were easily able to force her into chains and a heavy-duty restraint mask.The chains forced her hands and arms behind her back at odd angles, forcing her chest to puff out uncomfortably.A metal bar kept her elbows separated and durable cuffs brought her wrists together near her waist.

The cuffs were than attached to a chain that led to shackles on her feet.All of the metal had been treated with a Kryptonite compound and burned where they touched bare skin.

The muzzle kept her mouth immobile so that she couldn’t even hiss in pain.

She could however, glare at Lillian and wish her death.Kara had never wished such a fate on anyone in her life, but she found that she could wish nothing else on the woman.She’d never hated anyone as much as she hated Lillian Luthor and she’d do anything to see her life end.

Her captor smiled maliciously, as if she could tell what Kara was thinking and was enjoying her power even more because of it.“Bring it.”

The command was simple but effective, the guards pulling Kara along behind them by a chain they attached to the face restraint.Katu had risen to her feet but there was little she could do as a captive herself.

But Kara felt her rage.

It meant more to her than her friend getting herself killed over a momentary discomfort.

Unfortunately, it seemed that they had a ways to go to get to Lillian’s destination.What made Kara wary was the insufferable smirk the woman wore the whole way there.

There being Kara’s second most hated place in the world.Honestly this place competed with her first most hated place, the Kitchen, but logically she knew she could die in the Kitchen.She couldn’t die here.

Not unless she gave herself a heart attack.

Entirely possible since she already could feel her chest tighten as anxiety started to set in.

The guards threw her into a box like cell, the walls and ceilings actually retractable and –of course— lined with Kryptonite.

Kara simply knelt on the floor, her arms still bent behind her.Fighting now would serve no purpose.As terrified as she was about what was about to happen, she also knew that no amount of begging, crying, or raging would remove her from her situation.

Lillian never changed her mind.

This was going to happen no matter what Kara did and she would not give Lillian the satisfaction.Her lips trembled in the mask and she felt tears well up in her eyes.

No…

She would not give in.

No.

Jon had told her his mother sang to him when he got scared, maybe a song?Kara fought to remember the lyrics he had taught her… something something… in my heart… yeah.

Lillian’s smile was outright malicious now, her eyes gleaming as another set of people entered the room.It was the usual guards and scientists… and—

Alex.

_Alex_ was here.

Alex was _here._

_No._

No. No, no, no, no.Please Rao—

“This is our prized experiment, code name K-2S0.”Lillian turned her attention to the red head next to her.“But then I guess you two have already met.”

Alex crossed her arms, her gaze cold and apathetic as she studiously ignored Kara’s presence.She was dressed for work, in a pants suit that fit her well and made Kara ache with how beautiful she was.Alex’s hair was longer, the ends just slightly curled and brushing her shoulders; her old style had framed her jaw perfectly.This new style made her look softer, more open.Kara didn’t much care which style she wore as long as she was ok; as long as she wasn’t hurt.She’d missed her so much.

But she’d never wanted her to come here.

Had hoped beyond hope that Alex would go anywhere else.Antarctica.

She should have gone to the south pole.

“What’s your game here Luthor?You know we met.You’re the one who assigned her to me.”

Lillian chuckled, the sound echoing around the silent room as she pulled a remote from her pocket.“I have no game.Only an apology.The alien threat is real and my only wish was to show you how dangerous they truly are.”

The blonde pressed a button and the ceiling and floor pushed in towards themselves, forcefully bending Kara into an awkward position that made her back, arms, and legs scream at her.

“What,” Lillian sneered, “is your name?”

She shouldn’t do this.She should just play along…

But she couldn’t.

She was remembering things… her life on Krypton…

She’d had an aunt in the military who told her to live with honor always.

The House of El would not lose that honor on her behalf.

“My name,” she said, fighting against the immobility of her jaw and the fear warring with her pride.“is Kara Zor-El.”

Alex tensed, a brief expression of _something_ flickering over her face, but she said nothing.

Lillian sighed in false displeasure and Kara knew she had done exactly what the woman wanted.

“This is where we serve some of our… more tame punishments.”Lillian said as she handed a reluctant Alex the remote.“I thought you’d like to the opportunity for a little revenge on your first day here.”

The earlier tension that Alex had exhibited was gone, and she looked down at the remote in her hand disinterestedly, her thumb hovering over the button that Lillian had indicated.“What’s it do?”

“I think you’ll be very satisfied.”

“No.”The garbled words had escaped Kara’s mouth before she could hold them in.She’d promised herself not to beg; had told herself over and over that it would only be making Lillian happy.And she had sworn she was never going to make that woman happy again… but she couldn’t help it.The abject terror combined with Alex’s random arrival had made her out of sorts and she found herself pleading anyway.“Please Alex—”

“Press number 3 dear.”

Alex did, and a surge of electricity filled the cell, scorching Kara’s legs and the backs of her arms.She clenched her teeth around the muzzle, her spit dripping from the opening when she couldn’t close her mouth; a high-pitched gasp leaving her throat.

It was brief, meant as a warning more than anything else but it had still put that satisfied smirk back on Lillian’s face.

“Satisfying, isn’t it?”

Alex looked at Lillian with a blank expression, her own lips twitching at the corners.“Extremely.”

“Alex…”Kara breathed, trying to make her words clearer despite the contraption that was making her sound garbled and incomprehensible.“Alex, please.”

“Shut up!” The woman scolded, her brown eyes flashing her rage as she _finally_ looked at Kara.The Kryptonian had never seen her so angry before, not even after what happened with Maggie.There was pure hate on her face.“You are _nothing_ to me, understand?You will not speak to me; you will not address me.I hate you.So _shut up_.”

Kara felt like she was floating, she felt her body and the pain that still radiated through her but… it was like she wasn’t even there.

Lillian looked pleased.

“Number 5 now if you please?”

Alex pressed it and the front panel of the cell that was made of glass was suddenly blacked out, the room crashing suddenly and abruptly into darkness.Sound no longer made it on her side of the wall and she felt herself start to hyperventilate.

She lasted a full 220 seconds before she started screaming to be let out.

It was almost 6 minutes before she started crying for Alex, sure that maybe the woman hadn’t meant what she said.That it had been a ploy.That even now Alex was removing the threat and coming to get her.

She screamed herself hoarse and then continued.

Because Alex _was_ coming.She’d promised.Alex wouldn’t lie.She was coming.

Kara didn’t stop screaming until it became physically impossible.

And even then, she kept trying.

Alex was coming for her.

She was coming.

~*~

 

Alex exhaled noisily as she finally stepped into her apartment.Bone deep exhaustion warred with the nervous energy that was coursing through her, as she took in the space before her.

Well ok.It wasn’t technically her apartment.Technically it was a perk that CADMUS had given to her for joining their team.The DEO had never gifted her such a luxury and she made a mental note to ask Hank why in the world he hadn’t gotten her an apartment.

_Cheap boss,_ she thought idly as she hung her suit jacket on the peg by the door.

Alex was tired.She was tired emotionally, mentally, and physically.She was running on fumes and she was really looking forward to a nice warm bath and a few hours in a bed that didn’t feel like wood.Everything that had happened today—everything that had happened in the past 6 months—it could wait.It would hold until tomorrow.She just needed one night.

Just one fucking night to clear her head.

The apartment was huge.Much larger than her studio had been, with gorgeous wooden floors, and soft cream and brown tones and rugs strewn about.Her eyes strayed to the large scenic view that came with the floor to ceiling windows on the far side of the living room and she felt herself relax a bit.

Linda would have loved that.

A soul deep ache nearly consumed her and she swallowed the sudden swell of emotions.

_No,_ she acknowledged silently as she walked over to the fridge. _Not Linda.Kara.Linda had confirmed that her name was Kara.And she was also the RAT, and K-2S0._

Well that or it was all a test.A ploy by Lillian.Maybe Lillian had figured out who she was looking for and assigned Linda to trick her again.

It was plausible if she wanted to test Alex’s loyalty.Something Alex herself would have done.Which is why she had pressed that fucking remote.Alex closed her eyes briefly, trying to block out the screams that were still sounding through her head.She needed to think of something else.Anything else.

She looked into the cool fridge, seeing shelves filled with food.Alex grabbed a jar of pickles and a bottle of water.There was no cake and she cursed Lillian before her eyes zeroed in on the bottles of wine and beer in the side door.

Well then.

She grabbed a mango from the top shelf and slammed the door closed.

_Not today, Satan._

She’d just pulled a pickle out of the jar, her mind running through plans, when music filtered through the apartment dragging her attention to a side room she hadn’t known existed.

_“I hate everything about you.Why do I love you?”_

Three Days Grace. The lead singer belted his anger and frustration on the track, the heavy guitar riffs vibrating down to the floor.Then a steady sound of something hitting wood filtered to her ears.

Well if her neighbors didn’t hate her before…

She palmed her gun, moving slowly to the room where the noise had originated from and peeking around the corner.

She sighed and holstered her weapon.

Vasquez grinned at her and held up a sign.

**You are being followed dumbass. This is Reep Daggle, he shapeshifted into you so they won’t know you left. Come with me if you want to live. P.S. I missed you.** __

How sweet.

Alex glanced behind her where an exact replica of her was pounding away at a Wing Chun Dummy.She sighed again.Her doppelganger had better form than she did.

Not cool.

She allowed herself to be manhandled out of her shiny new apartment and then led to the apartment directly across from her.

Subtle.

The apartment was empty devoid of anything except the original floorplan and a lone folder on the stone countertop.Vasquez turned to her as soon as the door closed behind them, holding a finger up to keep Alex quiet as Felicity stepped out of nowhere with a literal wand and waved it over Alex.Fucking weirdos.

“She’s clean.”Felicity proclaimed seconds before engulfing Alex in a tight hug.“Frack I missed you!”

“First off: what’s with all the clouds on the outside?Don’t you guys believe in sunlight?”Alex asked as she held her back just as tightly, her arms banding around the shorter woman’s shoulders.“And two: back at you kid.”She went so far as to kiss Felicity’s blonde head.“What’s with all the secrecy?You don’t want my new overlords to know I know you?Or that I have amazing taste in music?”

Vasquez stared at her and said deadpan, “the clouds came in the day you were put away.The gods themselves did cry.”

“Damn I missed you Vaz.”

The other agent smirked and gave her her own hug.“Honestly we have no idea about the clouds.Maybe it’s global warming.We’ve had bigger fish to fry.”

“Like?”Alex said as she stepped back from her and threw an arm over Felicity’s shouders.

The two women exchanged looks, before Vasquez slowly shook her head.“A few things Danvers… for one, you’re taste in music sucks and given your penchant for crappy breakup music this past month I thought this playlist would be fitting.”Alex nodded in understanding.It was a fair point.“And two… we might have pulled some strings…”

Alex frowned, releasing Felicity completely as she prepared herself for giant sized shenanigans.“I figured.I thought we were going with prison breakout?I was really looking forward to being on America’s Most Wanted.Only elite criminals are allowed on that list you know.”

Felicity squeezed her hand affectionately, but Vasquez just rolled her eyes.“I made a contact at CADMUS… Or rather your mother did. You were already on their radar but… I might have put it into S.H.I.E.L. D’s ear that you were a great asset.Lillian was forced to act before they snatched you up.The contact… well, he just made sure everything went smoothly.”

“Ok… not seeing the bad here.I mean you knew I wanted that invite, it’s fine if you didn’t do it out of the goodness of your heart.”

“Alex.”The tone of Felicity’s voice had her propping her hands on her hips, brows furrowing as she tried to understand why these two were acting so odd.“It was your dad.Your mom’s contact was Jeremiah.”When Alex said nothing, Felicity chose to move on.A gesture that Alex was grateful for considering she had no idea what to say.Jeremiah Danvers was no longer her father; he couldn’t be.Not with what he had done.Him getting her out of prison could hardly be something he did out of love.“I also finished decrypting the drive Linda gave me.And the data dump I got from the hacker… You might want to sit down.”

No.She really didn’t.

“Why?”

Felicity winced.“Because… Alex—because Linda is definitely—”

“Kara.”The words left her mouth without her volition.The acrid taste of shame heavy on her tongue.Alex had been in touch with her friends via email during her month away and they had shared theories through the encrypted VPN channel that Felicity had set up.They knew that Alex thought Linda was Kara; but had all been wary of laying too much into the theory… But the second Kara had said her name today… The doubt Alex had held onto had been little more than a last-ditch effort at self-preservation.“She’s Kara.I know.She confirmed it today.”

Felicity’s eyes bugged.“Wha—she told you?Like—wait?You _saw_ her?”

“Lillian’s first order of business.”Alex folded her arms across her chest, rocking slightly on her heels.“Grant me my revenge on the alien menace.”

Felicity’s face softened, and Alex looked away abruptly.Nope.She was not going to lose it now.

“What did you do?”Vasquez questioned, voice direct and sharp.Like a mission.

Alex could do missions.She glanced up at Vasquez through the bangs of her slightly longer hair and pressed that advantage.

“Lillian Luthor handed me a remote and told me to press a button.I did.I’m not sure what it did but… she was screaming.”Vasquez huffed in anger, running a hand down her face and Alex looked away again, eyes glaring at the floor.She hadn’t wanted to remember that part.Still didn’t want to remember it.Because Linda— _Kara_ —had been screaming for _her;_ screaming for _Alex._ “Doesn’t matter.She’s not—I… she’s not _my_ Kara.Or even Linda Taylor for that matter.It was all made up, a fabrication designed in a lab.Lillian showed me her implant.She _killed_ Mercado; she killed those other agents… who knows how many other people?She tried to kill Cat.That stuff… it wasn’t _real._ I saw the real her that night… I’m not so sure setting someone like that loose is such a great idea anymore.I was going to talk to Hank about a permanent placement at the DEO.I know it’s not ideal but… I don’t know what else to do. _”_

Felicity and Vasquez exchanged another look before Vasquez grabbed a folder from the counter behind her.“You’re gonna wanna look at this Danvers.”

Alex sighed, pinching her brow between her fingers.“I’m not—”

Vasquez thrust the folder into her chest.“Look!”

Scowling Alex grabbed the folder and moved to lay the files on the counter.

Petulance warred with curiosity as Alex stared down at the folder in front of her.Linda Taylor had betrayed her in the worst way; had lied to her for months.Alex got it; she understood.

She’d been doing her job and Alex had gotten caught in the middle.Hell, Alex had done the same thing on numerous occasions… but this hurt.This hurt like hell.

Swallowing her pride, she immaturely flicked the folder open, allowing the contents to spill ever so slightly, white knuckling the surface in front of her, and glaring at the black and white photos.

Winn should have gone to ViOps with this; the images were still grainy.The techs there might have been able to enhance the images for him, you could barely see the girl's fac—

She tensed abruptly.

She knew that face.

Breath coming unevenly, Alex moved one hand to the first grainy image; a picture of a small teenage girl in hospital drapes.She was laying on a metal table, with surgical markings across her naked body.A team of surgeons surrounded her, a surgical saw in the lead doctor's hand.In the bottom right corner of the picture were the words: 'Attempt 17'.

Alex saw all of this; she took in every detail of the image, her mind cataloguing away factors for later review.Her heart though was focused on the face of the girl: a strong brow, thick eyebrows led down to a barely there bridge that ended in a cute button nose.Her lips were larger than most girls Alex knew, but they fit her face.

She knew that face.

Kara.

Except it wasn't just Kara Alex realized as she dug through the contents of the folder.Similar pictures were pulled out of their bindings, all of the same woman, just at different ages.Alex wanted to vomit at the first 'successful' attempt she found.They'd performed these 'tests' all the way up to adulthood.

Adult Kara looked so different from teenage Kara.She'd lost the baby fat, had grown taller and filled out more.Her lower lip was slightly bigger; face harder.And they'd cut her open, torn her apart.

They'd taken her arm… they'd taken her _eye_.

Alex felt sick as she traced the face of the woman in the photo; K-2S0 looked ruthless, a perfect replica of the woman who had shot Alex from her balcony.Of the woman who had spared Alex on that rooftop all those months ago.

She was a killer, but she hadn't killed Alex.Either time.

"It was her first extended op.They wanted to see if they could trust her in the field.Apparently, she failed whatever test they wanted her for."Vasquez's voice startled her out of her reverie and she looked up to see the agent holding a tablet out for her.Alex took it with shaky hands, pressing play and watching the 'interrogation' that followed."From what Felicity could pull, it had something to do with her 'forming attachments'; we think that means you."She paused, trying to gauge Alex’s reaction before continuing steadily.“There was more; are you familiar with the Jason Bourne movies?”

Alex managed a shaky nod.

“That sort of ‘programming’ is real.I know several branches that employ it for their more… extreme missions.It helps keep soldiers sane enough for redeployment.In this case, CADMUS apparently figured out how to use it on a Kryptonian.We don’t think she remembers anything prior to her mission, Alex.They ‘wipe’ her memory clean every time they want to redeploy her; clean slate.That’s why she couldn’t remember you.And that thing at the bridge… with Cat… Felicity thinks they ‘activated’ her somehow.She’s working on a fix for it but its gonna take some time.”Vasquez voice went soft, no longer the even drone she used when delivering mission notes.“Our hope is that you will have infiltrated CADMUS deep enough to find her and extract her.If they let ALFA use her… I don’t think I have to tell you how awful my day would be.And that could happen any day now.That’s why we didn’t go with the prison break; we don’t have the time.We needed to move quickly and take as many of their players off the board as possible.As far as I know, Kara is there greatest asset.”

“Why haven’t they wiped her this time?”

She felt Felicity shift behind her but didn’t turn to look, too focused on the screen in front f her.“We had a few theories… the first is that they need information from her and if they wipe her… well that information goes away.”Felicity rested her hand against Alex’s back, the weight soothing and heavy all at once.“The other theory… that kind of brainwashing… it takes extreme emotion.They need to get her to a place where her mind is malleable, vulnerable.Extreme bouts of pain; like extreme.Or fear… Rage.They haven’t been able to get her there this time around.”

“Mercado was an ALFA spy; they offered him a lot of money and a safe place for him and his family after their plans.Same for the other agents.I would have liked to see them brought to trial too Alex, but given her orders I’m not going to blame Kara for eliminating the threat.”Vasquez kept her voice as she laid the information before Alex.“Those agents were compromised and they were more than willing to sell us all out in exchange for money and the promise of a comfortable life.Kara’s actions might have stopped the DEO from suffering the same fate as the NCPD, although I’m not sure why Lillian allowed her to interfere on our behalf.”

Alex swallowed back bile as she watched Linda— Kara— get pummeled by a cybernetic man.He hit her with closed fist after each apparently incorrect answer.Kara's cheeks shimmered in the light, and Alex had known her for months-- she'd never sweat in all that time.She was crying.

Taking a deep breath, she slowly raised her head, Vazquez stared back at her with open understanding.

"I'm gonna need a few things."She requested past the frog in her throat.

"Name it."

Things moved fairly quickly after that.Felicity made some calls and somehow Oliver, Winn, Hank, Mon-El, The Titans and Astra were all in the building.Winn brought two large bulky cases that unfolded into large banks of monitors.He used one triple set to pull up communications with M’gann, Black Canary, and the Flash, and another to begin laying the groundwork for the tech side of the plan. Someone, somewhere had decided that Clark would be too conspicuous and so he was relegated to listening out for any trouble that might be headed their way.

The man of steel, a glorified lookout.

If the situation weren’t so dire, Alex might have laughed.Barry did it enough for both of them, he and the green boy Alex had saved trading jokes about the boy scout while their purple friend looked on in displeasure.They were a 90’s boy band with two women and it was fucking with Alex’s head.They did not seem to notice or care about her displeasure though, as the cybernetic teen and his traffic light accomplice doled out waffles to the group.No one knew where they got the waffles but they ate them all the same.

Meanwhile, Alex had gone to town on the Surface tablet Felicity had given to her.

“How long do you think something like this should take?”

The group crowded around the tablet before Felicity huffed impatiently and projected the screen onto the last monitor that Winn had brought with him.

Oliver’s eyebrows rose through his hairline.“This is…”

“Ambitious,” M’gann finished when it seemed Oliver couldn’t find his words.“How long did it take you to come up with this?”

“32 days, 15 hours, and 43 minutes.I did have to tweak it a little given the new information but…”Alex crossed her arms as she took in her work.“I’ll tell you one thing, being wrongfully imprisoned does wonders for sobriety.Originally I was a little peeved that you didn’t send me a nice bottle of wine,” she said accusingly to Felicity before offering her a pleased smile.“but I’m good now.”

Felicity rolled her eyes, the thoughtful expression she had been wearing returning once her temporary annoyance with Alex was done.“You’re relying a whole lot on other people here.That’s new.”

“New year, new me.”Alex quipped, dropping her hands and stuffing them into her back pockets.“I’m sorry to say but you and your husband are a necessary element here.”

“Sometimes I wonder if people only want me for my hacking skills or because Oliver comes with my hands.”Various choking sounds came from the assembled guests and Felicity shut her eyes in horror.“As in he comes _with_ my hands.Like my hands being a temporary noun replacement for my knowledge of all things firewalls and intrusion based.Not anything sexual.This was not a sexual statement.Completely not sex—”

“Felicity,” Oliver murmured, leaning into her slightly with crossed arms.The grey Henley he was wearing only serving to exacerbate the redness in his cheeks, but a hint of a smile played on his lips and the ever-present fondness shone brightly in his eyes.“I think they get it.”

“Right.”

Winn cleared his throat.“It should be only a two week turn around according to the sims I ran but… I hardly see how you could have planned a full-on CADMUS attack if you didn’t know Kara was in there.”

“I need you to shorten that; cut it in half.And I didn’t know she was in there; I guessed.And I knew for a fact that my father was.” Alex shrugged her shoulders.“I was pretty sure he could have gotten me to Linda before I killed him.”

“How Oedipus of you.”Mon-El sighed out from his position on the floor.The man looked like he was doing his best impression of a chalk outline.

“Oedipus slept with his mother.”Winn argued.

Mon-El nodded.“Then that is not you.”

“I’m sorry,” Alex said with a confused tilt of her head.“Why is he here again?”

“That’s the same question I’ve been asking.”Mon-El replied.

Astra sniffed from where she was studying the plans Alex had drawn out.

Winn winced.“That’s kind of my fault… Superman asked me to keep an eye on him, you know try to give him something useful to do.”

“Like play possum.”Alex deadpanned.

Winn winced again.

Mon-El groaned and rolled himself into a seated position.

“Here.”He pulled a letter from his pocket.“I was asked to deliver this to you, but then you went to jail so…”

Alex frowned but accepted the missive, her name written in Linda’s— _Kara’s_ — neat penmanship.

“When did she…”

“The night before everything went to hell.She seemed pretty panicked, scared…”

Alex nodded, her throat working as she pocketed the letter.“Thank you.”

Mon-El shrugged and resumed his earlier position.

Big lug.

“If you want us to cut the planning phase down, we’re going to need more camera angles.Better layouts.The blueprints on that thumb drive were dated for 2 years ago.The main infrastructure may not have changed, but security systems are altered all the time.”Oliver said, bringing them back on track.

Alex sighed and shook her head.“I can’t just sneak you guys in and it’s not like I have an eidetic memory.”She turned to Winn and Felicity.“Can’t you guys just hack their network?”

The two computer nerds glanced at each other and then promptly burst into laughter.

“That’s so cute.”Winn tittered.“She wants us to “just hack” their network.”

Felicity’s expression was fond but she still looked at Alex like she couldn’t quite believe she’d asked that.“Sweetie, I love you but you don’t just “hack” people.There are steps involved.Planning.A careful touch—”

“ _They already tried_.”Barry cut in, speeding off screen and returning with a slice of pizza.“ _Don’t let them tease you.They even asked Oracle for help.I believe the exact words were “the person who designed this was slightly smarter than me”.”_

“I did _not_ say that.”Felicity cried, fuming when Winn only smirked and stuffed a waffle in his mouth.Honestly, where the hell were they getting those things?

“Look,” Winn said with some exasperation, Felicity’s expression obviously making his nervous. “The thing is gaining access to CADMUS’ network is easy but getting behind their firewalls to their data drives…I’m pretty sure that’s impossible.You have three of the greatest hackers in the world at your fingertips and none of us could get in.”

Vasquez frowned, sharing a short glance with Alex but it was Astra who broke the silence, her voice laced with frustration and anger. “So you gathered us here for nothing?There is nothing we can do?”

Alex understood the frustration.10 years.10 years they’d been looking for Kara.For Astra it had been even longer, what with her time in the phantom zone.It was all for nothing.Necklace or no necklace.If they didn’t get Kara out of there soon, she was going to die.

When Alex had first talked to John Constantine about the present, she hadn’t expected it to work out quite so well.As it was, it apparently had.After Lillian had made her press that button, she had immediately questioned Alex about the origin of the jewelry.She had been trying to catch her off guard, and if Alex hadn’t just spent a month in prison with nothing else to do but plan this moment, she might have given something away.

_“How did she acquire that necklace?”_

_Ah._

_So John Constantine had come through after all._

_“I’m not sure.I asked her about it but she would only tell me it was from a friend.I know she was close to your daughter—”_

_“It wasn’t my daughter.She would never protect such… filth.” Lillian practically spat the words, and Alex added her reaction to her ever growing mental folder.She was very much going to enjoy squeezing the life from this woman._

_“Yes, well be that as it may… If you give me a car and a gun I can find out for you.”Alex was sure to keep her voice even, her body just slightly tensed in anger.Lillian probably thought her anger directed at Kara, but Alex had no anger left over for anyone after seeing what Lillian had resulted her to._

_Kara’s skin hung off of her in unhealthy bags of flesh, the bones of her arms and face clearly visible through the prison like ensemble she had been forced into.There was literally no meat on her.Alex had never quite seen the expression ‘skin and bones’ on such a level of accuracy and she hoped to god that she never saw it again.Even Kara’s hair, which was normally so thick and heavy with a yellow golden shine, was matted and patchy; the pink of her scalp easily seen through the thin strands.Everything about her was sunken and defeated and Alex had feared that she might have been too late; the dead look in the woman’s eyes doing little to convince her otherwise._

_She hadn’t even known how badly she’d wanted to save Linda until she’d seen her like this.Hadn’t known how in love with the woman she still was._

_But then Lillian had asked for her name, and those eyes, now blue, had burned with a fire Alex had never been able to forget._

_How could she not have seen her before?_

_She’d been right in front of her and Alex had been so blind.Had lost valuable time in the process.She wouldn’t make the same mistake again._

_“That thing took everything from me.”Alex said, allowing her hatred to leak into her voice.It was a careful thing, thinking of Lillian but speaking as though it was about Kara.“Allow me to return the favor.”_

“Not at all.”Felicity said, her smile returning to full wattage and reminding Alex of Linda.Blonde balls of sunshine.Apparently, she had a type.“You see, I anticipated Alex wanting to move as soon as possible.Which is why I called in the cavalry.Dun duh duh dun!”Felicity flung her arms towards the five teenagers who were too busy squabbling over how much butter was too much to pay her any attention.Alex was less than impressed.“Eh hem!I said Dun duh duh dun!”Here Felicity added spirit fingers and the red alien saw this time and nudged her teammates into order.

The traffic light stepped forward thrust his hand out to Alex.“Agent Danvers, B—Batman!Batman has told me so much about you.”

Alex shook the hand.“You too.He said you were his favorite Robin.”

The boy blushed and scratched the back of his head before visibly steeling himself and gesturing towards his team.“These are my friends.Cyborg, he’s ballistics and intelligence; Beastboy, espionage and special teams; Starfire, heavy artillery and negotiations; And Raven, magic, transport, and medical.”

Alex nodded to each teen in turn, assessing them slowly.She saw Astra do the same.

“I do not see how these children can help us.”The Kryptonian said.“Have you all been trained?”

The Titans looked affronted, and Beastboy stepped forward with a puffed chest.“Ms. Alien Ma’am lady, you all were saying that you need a better lay of the lake, right?”

“Land.”Raven corrected, looking slightly bored with the whole affair.Alex had a feeling she was the typical teenage goth.Long sullen silences and mean comments.Perfect.

Beastboy waved his hand at the correction, obviously used to such things and doing nothing to ignite Alex’s confidence in his abilities.“Right yes. Land.I’m your guy.Espionage at your service.”

“It’s not a title.”Raven argued in her monotone voice.

Beastboy bristled, glaring at the floating girl.“Robin just said—"

“BB!”Robin interrupted, a tense smile pasted on his face.“Just show them the thing.”

Beastboy blinked in confusion before Robin made some weird hand gesture and his face lit up.“Oh.Right!”

And then he was gone.

As in gone gone.

Disappeared gone.

Or at least Alex thought he had.The annoying buzzing fly that she swatted away from her face morphing back into the teen pretty much summed up why he would be useful to them.

“I see.”She said.

Beastboy grinned.“I can just come in on your shoulder.I can even be a microbe or bacteria and they _definitely_ wouldn’t notice me.But Felicity said she can’t make a camera that small.”

“I can’t.I can’t even make one for your flea form, but Ray can and he did.”Felicity agreed.“Fly is as small as you can go.We’ll send Beastboy in with you, he’ll fly around and the camera that Ray designed will scan everything.We’ll have a 3D model printed in two days and that will cut down our planning significantly.”

Alex grabbed her friend in a fierce hug.“Felicity Smoak you are a genius!”

“ _What about extraction_?”M’gann asked from her screen.“ _It’s great if you go in there and get Kara but how exactly are you going to get her out?That diagram looks at least 20 stories deep._ ”

“We will kill them all if necessary.”Astra said from Alex’s left, making the agent frown.

“I thought you said you don’t kill?”

Astra glared at her, her eyes flashing dangerously as some of her anger flared.“This is different Brave One.An act of war was committed against the Great Scion of a Great House.To respond in anything else would be a dishonor.”

Alex nodded, strangely ok with Astra slaughtering the entirety of CADMUS if it meant that Kara got out.“War it is then.And it’s 36 stories M’gann.Almost 1500 feet in the ground.”Astra’s frown deepened and she shifted uneasily.Alex understood her discomfort, for a Kryptonian the yellow sun was literally their bread and butter.Being that far below ground cut them off from what essentially could be there life force.If Astra or Kal got trapped down there, it could be a game over.Kara had been trapped down there for _years._ “It’s not going to be as easy as a hack and slash Astra.Much as I want to make CADMUS pay for what they did, we’d be dead before we reached the exit.And my original plan of bombing them to hell, would bomb us and all of their victims as well.”

The lines in the generals face deepened but then she turned to regard Hank.“You are a Martian.Could you not phase us into the desired location?”

Hank shrugged, his posture relaxed but alert as always.“Maybe a few people, 5 possibly… no where near the number that we would need.”

“Then what is it you are proposing we do?Leave my niece to die?”Astra growled, her arms dropping from where she’d had them crossed in front of her.Alex had thought she’d seen Astra truly angry, she’d known nothing.The woman was _scary._ Her eyes glowing a bright blood red as she glared at Hank who remained impassive.

Barry frowned.“ _Hey now, no one is suggesting that.We’re not suggesting that are we guys_?”

Everyone shook their heads and murmured their dissent, and at least Astra’s eyes stopped glowing even if the rest of her remained as tightly coiled as a boa constrictor.

“Astra,” Felicity started and Alex wondered if her friend had a death wish.“That’s another reason we asked the Titans for help.They may just be kids but they are very talented.Like Robin said, Raven is the transport for the team.”

The purple haired teen gracefully lowered her legs, so that instead of floating in the lotus position she was now standing properly.“Pleasure.”

Alex liked her.

“How exactly are you going to transport everyone?”She found herself eyeing the girl, the short diminutive stature lending little credence to her arrogant tone.If monotone could be arrogant anyway.The girl still had not used an iota of inflection in her voice. 

Raven inhaled noisily, her cloak tightening around her on its own and freaking Alex the hell out.“I will not do circus tricks like Beastboy.I am no one’s clown.”

“HEY!”

“Raven,” Robin quickly interjected before the two of them could begin arguing again, “is as I said before well versed in magic.She can open portals and bend space and time.We’ve never had to evacuate quite _this_ many people before but I’m pretty sure if we take it floor by floor we’ll be fine.”

“Pretty sure?”Astra asked, her eyebrow quirked with annoyance.

Robin blanched.“Positive.I am positive.”

“No, he’s not.”Raven interjected.

“Raven—”

“No, Robin.”The girl turned to glare at each adult in turn.“I understand that this situation is less than ideal but you came to _us_ for help. _You_ called _us._ We’re not going to bow and whimper so that the cool adults can like us.”Raven fixed her stern gaze on Astra.“No, we are not sure because we have never done this before. _No one_ has ever done this before.We’re all making this up as we go along and if you need to live in a word of certainties than you need to find a new profession and maybe leave your niece’s safety to people who are willing to do whatever they can to help her.”

The room was deathly silent, everyone tensed as they waited for Astra’s response.

The Kryptonian stood at attention, her back rigid and eyes narrowed to thin slits as she looked at the teen who had dared publicly chastise her.

Then she exhaled slowly, the tension leaving her body with the breath, and looked to Alex.“I like her.”

“Me too.”Alex agreed.

“Whatever.”Winn interrupted.“You can have your kumbaya moment later.My best friend is trapped somewhere with my potentially evil girlfriend.I’d like to break up with her properly and get Lin— _Kara_ out.”

Felicity grimaced, typing something on her tablet.“Well, with everyone’s abilities that does give us a lot more to work with and so the week thing might be doable but we still have another problem.”

“What problem?”Alex asked.

_“We might have a problem too.”_ Clark’s voice rang clear through the room and Alex frowned.

“What problem?” She repeated.

_‘Not sure yet, give me a second.”_

Alex rolled her eyes and turned her attention back to Felicity.

“The thing is,” her best friend hedged, “remember when I told you there was a kid?”

A heavy weight fell in Alex’s stomach and she placed a palm over her abdomen.

_Shit._

A quick glance at Astra told her that maybe now was _not_ the best time to be talking about this.

“Fe—” She warned.

“No, wait.It wasn’t—” Felicity flapped her hands and Oliver caught them easily.

“It was a test tube baby.”Winn finished, his eyes serious for once and devoid of their usual humor.“As far as we’ve been able to tell Lillian never authorized any… misconduct.K-3S9 was the 9th attempt at genetic splicing.Kara has a daughter Alex.”

Alex swallowed.

Well Fuck.

“Do we have a location on the child?”That came from Hank, the man ever focused on what he could control.

Alex had had to close her eyes to remain standing.

“No.”Felicity said.“That’s the problem.Even if we did take CADMUS down and free Kara and the others… her daughter would still be lost to us.If that’s how they were manipulating her… I can’t see it ending well.”

Alex scowled, fire thrumming through her veins and making her body _burn._ “Where would CADMUS even keep a kid?”Alex asked, frustration leaking into her voice as she began rearranging her plans.“Where would I look?”

“Where would _we_ look.”Winn interrupted.“We’re all in this now and—”

“Perhaps I could help with that.”

3 weapons and two sets of laser eyes were aimed and ready in moments, homed in on the intruder.Clark had sped over with the new arrival, apparently trying and failing to circumvent the interruption.Clark was the first one to respond, his voice and expression puzzled as he took in the robot in front of him.

“Kelex?”

The AI sniffed disdainfully.“A child still certainly.I sir am nobody’s library.I am an advisor.My name is Artax.”

Clark raised his brows but nodded his head in deference.“Of course.Apologies.May I ask who you are an advisor to?”

“Kara Zor-El, Great Scion to the House of El.She asked me to find assistance, unfortunately you were unreachable Alex Danvers.”The bot moved closer to Alex, it’s body bobbing as it floated over to her.

“Me?”Alex questioned stupidly, trying to make her face seem normal amongst her confusion and awe at the science in front of her.“She sent you to me?”

“You are her mate.She would entrust no one else with her seed.”

Seed?Child.Kara’s daughter.Right.Kara had trusted her.

Alex had been through a lot in the past few months and she was learning how to stop taking responsibility for things that weren’t in her control.Nothing that had happened with Kara had been in her control.It wasn’t her fault.

She saw that.

She understood that.

But she’d be damned if she was going to let her girl hurt for any longer than necessary.

She nodded at the AI, her voice steely with determination, mind whirring with ideas.

“Where is she?”

~*~

Two teams.

They’d had to split into two teams.

It had been obvious once the factor of Kara’s daughter had been brought to the equation but with the sheer amount of forces CADMUS had at their disposal…

Two teams might not be enough to cut it.

Mon-El had been useless as always, whining and drinking enough that Alex hadn’t trusted him on _either_ team and he had been sent back to the alien bar to mope around like he liked.

They needed the Titans at CADMUS, and with the youth and inexperience Alex was not wont to break them apart.

Oliver was her backup and Astra had denied going anywhere her niece was not.Hank and Barry were needed to assist with evacuations…

And she _really, really_ wanted Clark around for the same reason.

She’d been inside CADMUS now.She’d seen the conditions their prisoners were kept in.Her initial plan was to get them all out.

She might still be able to do that with the people she had on hand.

She _needed_ to be able to do that.

They needed Felicity at the controls, mainly because Oliver had looked like he would blow a gasket when she’d even suggested fieldwork, but also because of the two computer people they had on hand, she was the better hacker.

Winn had taken very little offense to this surprisingly and had simply said “power to the girls!” before placing himself on the TBD menu.

TBD.

Alex already knew where she wanted him.

Artax had been very detailed.

Kalasin, Kara’s daughter, was under 24/7 guard.She was never left alone, not even to use the bathroom.

She was behind three layers of containment fields, which meant that super powered people were out.Winn was not super powered but he also wasn’t a field agent.

The last time she had treated him like one, he’d stopped speaking to her for weeks.

A different approach would probably do wonders towards repairing their friendship.

She waited until everyone else was settled into their groups; the teams discussing the finer points of their plans and what they would need to execute, before she made her way over to Winn’s corner.The small man was glaring at his laptop, a live feed into Kara’s empty cell on his screen.

So whatever Alex had done to her was still happening.

She shoved that down, she couldn’t afford the distraction at the moment.Didn’t want to deal with the self-loathing.

Instead, she sat next to Winn on the floor, sliding down the wall and bringing her knees to her chest.

“I need you to do something that you aren’t going to like.”She said, staring straight ahead and keeping her breath even.“You can say no and I’ll respect it but I don’t know who else to ask.”

Winn frowned at his screen before turning to her and closing the lid.“This isn’t sounding warm and fuzzy.”

“You’ll notice,” Alex said as if he hadn’t spoken, “that the teams I have are currently all focused on CADMUS.We still need an extract team for Kara’s daughter.”

“I thought Clark might be contacting—”

“He’s not.With the way everything… he’s not.We’ll need people on the outside still and the kid’s in a place where super powers are a no-no.And there’s no way I’m trusting Batman with her.”

Winn nodded slowly and then shook his head.“I’m still not seeing where I fit in.”

Exhaling slowly, Alex finally garnered the courage to look him in the face.“I need you to go get her.”Winn’s eyes bugged and she hastened to explain her standpoint.“You saw the blueprints that Artax gave to us.There’s security everywhere, and not just in the human form.Someone’s going to need to open doors, turn off cameras and alarms and we both know that person will need to be onsite.”

“But me?!”Winn screeched incredulously.“I have no skills.Alex they’d murder me!”

“No they wouldn’t.I’m going to teach you how to throw a punch; keep yourself alive.”She asserted, placing her hand on his arm to try to calm him some.“Plus, you’ll have backup.”

“You just said there was no backup!”

“I said there was no super powered backup.At least not of the traditional variety.I still have a few aces up my sleeve.The first one—her name is Batwoman and she’s got some frustrations she’s got to let out.”

 

~*~

The next day found Alex sneaking Beastboy into CADMUS without incident.The teenage metamorph buzzed harshly in her ear once they were through security and then flew off to do his thing.Alex put him out of her mind lest she drown herself in worry.Felicity would let her know if something was wrong.

In the meantime, she focused all of her attention on her notebook.Now that she was a free woman, there was a pretty critical project that she needed to work on.It would probably take her the entire day and maybe some of the night to complete it, but Lillian had given her her own lab with her own resources.All of the resources.

Sometimes the bad guys really did have it good.

While she waited for the centrifuge to finish isolating the necessary cells, she seated herself at her lab table, the notebook opened before her.Alex leaned forward, allowing her chin to rest on one hand and idly tracing the letters on the pages with the other.

It was Kara’s writing.

Alex hadn’t discovered it until about a week after she’d been sentenced.Alone in a cell, she’d given herself a proper time allotment for self-pity before remembering that Maggie still needed her; Jon still needed her.She may not be able to treat them, but she could damn well design their treatment.Do the impossible.

When she had opened the notebook, she’d been surprised to find writing not her own.Some annoyance had come with it, especially when she’d realized whose handwriting it was.She distinctly remembered almost tearing the pages out, the memory of Linda sitting in front of her couch scribbling in Alex’s notebook clear in her mind.She’d been very angry at the woman back then, her pain blinding her to reason.

Her fingers had been poised to rip, the corner of the page held between two fingers, when she started to actually _read_ what Linda had written.What Kara had written.

Sitting at her lab table, Alex traced the formula that Kara had corrected.Regeneration.Kryptonians had been more than capable, Kara had said.With the right science and technology, it was wholly possible to heal dead or dying cells and organs.Jon’s cells were killing themselves, thinking either part of his DNA was the enemy; Maggie’s brain was barely functioning.

Kara had saved both of them with a simple correction to Alex’s notes.

Two of the most important people in Alex’s life owed _their_ lives to the woman Alex had just helped torture.

It was such bullshit.

The centrifuge beeped and Alex stood to retrieve her vials.This was going to take a while.

Beastboy buzzing in her ear brought her back when hours later she was capping her last vial, and she smiled at the teens perfect timing.She’s just extracted and labeled the perfect sample.She’d been working on this since she was sixteen years old, and with one correction, a month of planning, and a full day in a fully stocked lab…

It was perfect.

“Going somewhere?”Lillian’s voice pulled her from her thoughts and she pasted a smile on her face as she turned to face the woman.

“Yes.I am.”Alex grabbed her bag, sliding the syringe with the treatment into a metal case and then placing the case in her bag.Next, she picked up the stack of typed notes that she had on her table and handed them to Lillian.“This is the first return on your investment Ms. Luthor.Luckily for you I have the perfect test subject.”Alex tapped the small rack of containers that held the rest of the sample.“You might not want to test that on anyone useful, or anyone you don’t want to get very strong very quickly.At least not until I can verify the reactions.”

Lillian blinked at her gob smacked and Alex smiled again before walking around her and exiting the building.

It would take Lillian hours, possibly days to go through all of the crap Alex had just dumped on her, and even then, most of it was missing crucial details.Lillian would get the gist of what she had done but she’d never be able to recreate it.Not even through reverse engineering what Alex had left in the lab.Placebos.The lot of them.

Alex wasn’t so stupid as to give Evil incarnate a healing ability in a bottle.

Fuck that.

No, instead she got in her car and made a beeline to the hospital.It was late but Alex had never been one to follow proper protocol and she wasn’t going to start now.

The room was dimly lit when Alex arrived, having snuck past the hospital staff and going directly to the room Felicity had told her Maggie was in.

Her friend was propped on her side, her arms stretched out in front of her to allow the doctors easier access to the various tubes connected to her body.A ventilation tube was in her mouth and made a soft hum as it flooded her body with oxygen. Alex tried not to think that it was too late for that.

She fingered the case in her bag.It was a chance.

It was at least a chance.

She knocked softly on the door to alert Kate to her presence and the red head turned swiftly in her seat, eyes bloodshot and heavy with the dark bags underneath them.

Alex offered her a small smile and wiggled the flowers she had brought with her.

Kate smiled back at her and sank back in her chair, obviously too tired to move.“Maggie hates roses.”

“I know.I’m hoping she’ll smell them and wake up just so she can throw them out.”Alex returned, placing the flowers on the side table.

Kate laughed softly, her eyes fondly taking in Alex’s appearance.“You look good.Better than I expected.I’m sorry I wasn’t there… for your hearing… I just, I couldn’t—”

“Kate.”Alex interrupted, waving her hand to cut off her protest.“It’s fine.I understood. I wasn’t upset.”She shuffled her feet and stuffed her hands in her pocket before deciding that ripping off the band aid was better than prolonging this any further.“I think I have something that might help her.”Kate’s eyes widened and her body tensed.“No,” Alex tried again, “I know I have something that might help her, it’s just a matter of getting the right measurements for her body and… I have a sample with me.With your permission I’d like to try and—”

“Yes.”It was Kate’s turn to interrupt her now and Alex hesitated, unsure of herself in the face of such blind confidence.

“Kate—”

“Alex, I know you.I know how long you must have worked on this.”The woman’s eyes darted to her fiancée before returning to Alex.“It’s _Maggie._ You’d never hurt her.If anything, this only won’t work if you made whatever you cooked up to _weak._ I trust you honey.”

Alex swallowed.Nodded.

And then in a few smooth movements injected Maggie with the serum.

“It won’t work right away.”She explained when she saw Kate’s eyes greedily start to watch Maggie for any sign of change.“She’ll probably need multiple treatments… it depends but… I think… if it works, we should see definitive signs of improvement in two days.Increased blood flow, brain activity, and stimulation response.It might still take… I don’t know— _weeks_ maybe for her to wake up?If it works…”

Kate looked up at her with teary eyes.“No matter how this goes… _thank you.”_ She stood on shaky feet, swaying slightly at the new position and pulling Alex into a hug over the bed.“I missed you so much honey.”

Alex hugged her back.“I missed you too.”There was a moment of silence, both women content to be holding the other.But the peace couldn’t last, Alex had come here for more than one reason.“I found Kara.”

The words were whispered into Kate’s neck but the socialite still heard them and pulled away to hold Alex at arm’s length.“What?”

“I found Kara.” Alex repeated.“I’m going to go get her.”

Kate eyed her critically.“With who?”Alex told her all of it and Kate frowned.“That’s… ambitious.”

Alex smiled, feeling exhaustion start to set into her bones again.“Yeah, that’s what M’gann said.”

Kate pulled her over to the other side of the room where a small cot had been set up.Alex hadn’t even seen it there before but she sank down gratefully when Kate directed her to it.

“How can I help?”

Releasing a breath filled with tension, Alex craned her neck to look up at her friend.“It’s ok if you can’t—I just, I need—”

“Alex.How can I help?”

Alex told her and Kate smiled ruefully, pushing Alex’s slightly longer bangs out of her face.“Oh honey, is that all?”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So for anyone questioning the beginning of the chapter... of course there had to be a fall guy. You can't just decimate half the police force and have no one pay for that.
> 
> You can't kill Cat Grant and let that go unpunished. Alex wasn't responsible but she was there. Hence her trial.
> 
> The fact that she actually went to prison was some evil behind the scenes work by someone who thought she'd do less harm behind bars. Any guesses who that could be?
> 
> Her talk with J'onn was long overdue. I told you guys he wasn't being an asshole, just super overprotective. I love space dad.
> 
> And Lucy, I really love Lucy. I'm sorry she didn't have a bigger role in this but I just couldn't fit her AND everyone else. She'll have an interesting side story though if anyone wants to play off that.
> 
> Kara:  
> Kara gets her memories wiped yes but CADMUS has been unsuccessful in keeping her wiped/ contained. This is because she is Kryptonian and has healing powers. The damage they do to her mind is eventually healed which is why they had her on Kryptonite. To slow down her healing and keep her in the dark. When Felicity turned off the Kryptonite she sped up the healing. When Siobhan read those words she essentially unlocked a special program in Kara's head that shut down Kara and brought out her baser instincts. Think mind control rather than mind wipe. That too is not permanent and because she is no longer on kryptonite she was able to remember everything she did fairly quickly. Lillian probably didn't give her more kryptonite because she wanted her to remember. She's evil like that.
> 
> On a lighter note, Kara finally realized that Lillian has no power over her. Whose seen the Labrynth? I'm not gonna lie, I would have married the Goblin King... maybe... probably not but I would have been tempted.
> 
> Alex's breakup songs made me laugh while writing but I should point out that Alex has been trying to get on CADMUS' radar since the beginning of this story. Being that she's already put the pieces together at this point it stands to reason that she wants CADMUS to know she's bitter. She always has a reason for everything that girl... plus she might also just be bitter.
> 
> Writing the Alex/ Kara scene was pretty difficult and Alex is going to have a lot of explaining to do but in her defense she was a lone wolf in a den of sociopaths. She had to make sacrifices.
> 
> But damn, Kara in pain is super difficult for me.
> 
> I'd also like to explain her condition. I used some references from comic lore (real comics not this new 52 where everyone is indestructible BS) and also took some stuff from Flashpoint. Pooled together I'd say Kryptonian's are much like plants in terms of their energy consumption and metabolism. I personally believe they still need to eat, but that the sun is maybe their main way of charging? Kind of like how humans need food, water, and rest; Kryptonians need food, water, rest, sunlight, and love. I made that last one up but it stands to reason that super powered people need more to live not less. That being said, Kara has been deprived of food, water, and sunlight for at least a few weeks at this point. Lillian has probably only done the bare minimum to keep her alive. So imagine someone who hasn't eaten; malnutrition in starving populations or prisoners of war. That's how Kara looks right now. Down to the hair loss, and bad teeth.
> 
> Vasquez and Felicity are back and plans are underway and we saw ARTAX! Yeah baby. We're coming Kara just hold on.
> 
> Also, I totally stole the idea of Alex making her plan in prison from the new Ocean's 8 movie. Sandra Bullock is goals.
> 
> The Titans are back and I should put a disclaimer that Raven is my favorite superhero of all time. Like all time. Then comes Spiderman, and then Blink from the X-men and Rogue. But for the purposes of this story, Beastboy might get more screen time because he is actually very useful.
> 
> Alex and Winn. Yes, the bromance returns... Alex asking and preparing rather than just throwing him to the wolves. #growth
> 
> Finally... Kate and Maggie... who saw that coming? So all you Kate/Maggie fans, there is hope for you on the horizon.
> 
> I told you I wasn't a monster...


	20. Let the Bodies Hit the Floor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ok guys here's the deal. This chapter is graphic. Graphic language, graphic violence, graphic mentions of torture, just graphic. So if that isn't your thing, skip over this one. If you come over to tumblr (chronicleofscout) and send me a message I'll give you a nongraphic play by play. You're welcome.
> 
> Moving on, this was posted late because my kitten apparently thinks I'm prey and I think its just the cutest thing ever. When he grows up and eats me alive though... well that will be unfortunate.
> 
> Also, I was about to post and I realized this had no title! How dare I! Then when I was like, oh decided my song title, AOO kicked me off? And deleted my notes?! The agony!!!
> 
> I'm so glad we survived all of that... now to the good stuff.
> 
> Song: Let the Bodies Hit the Floor- Drowning Pool

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, quick recap: 
> 
> After Kara got brainwashed into K-2S0, Alex took the fall and got sent to the slammer. 
> 
> That was tough, but meanwhile Kara had reverted back to who she was pre-K-2S0 and remembered all the chaos and pain she had caused. It sucked ass, and Lillian and the Real Henshaw were not helping matters. Unfortunately for them, they couldn't do any lasting damage and when Kara realized that she laughed her ass off and realized what Sara had in the Labrynth. Lillian had no real power over her. Cue heroic outro. Except she got thrown in her cell with no food or water or sunlight sooo…. that might be a loss.
> 
> Alex was still in prison during this so no rescue there. While there she moped and yelled until she discovered Kara's real name in her notebook. Her gaydar overloaded and she started her quest for vengeance.
> 
> Against CADMUS, not Kara. Keep up. So after discovering the love of her life was also in love with her, Alex got sprung by none other than Lillian Luthor. Except it wasn't Lillian it was Eliza and Jeremiah? Yay parenting?
> 
> Anyway, So Alex escaped a life sentence and together with her scooby squad started planning Kara's escape. She also learned about Kara's daughter, Kalasin (they don't know her name yet, she's still just K-3S9). Understandably confused at that milestone, she just loops the girl into her plans and starts executing. While she was doing that she also managed to finish the regeneration formula that Kara had helped her correct in her notebook (that was next to the Kara Zor-El Danvers but lets be honest about which one she focused on first.)
> 
> Alex administered the regen meds to Maggie and recruited Kate and we are now off to save Kara and Kalasin. Dun Dun Dun...

** Let the Bodies Hit the Floor **

_Alex._

_I feel like I should have started that with dear but I know you’d wrinkle your nose at that title.Any affectionate title really.And I refuse to put To Whom it May Concern.You might have been amused by it before but now… I’m stalling.I know I’m stalling.I’m just… I’m so so sorry Alex._

_~~If you’re reading~~ — I went away.You’re reading this letter because Linda was too much of a coward to tell you the truth.Alex, Linda is… employed by a secret organization; I can’t say the name but I think that’s better… it means you might stay away from all of this.I want you to…_

_I should have said something sooner…I’m telling you this now because… because well, it’s over isn’t it?_

_They won._

_Linda— **I** —I was hired.I can’t hide behind pseudonyms anymore.I failed, they’re coming anyway.I was hired to protect Cat—to keep her alive more like, until my creator no longer had a need for her.And then I met you.There was a… situation… on the roof, three blocks away from a yoga studio.You shot at me after I killed a fellow agent…_

_I deserved that._

_I deserved… a lot of things._

_Alex, after that night I was ordered to get close to you.But you have to know, I was already curious about you before that.I wanted to know you before it became part of my programming.And NOTHING that happened between us was ever because I felt obligated!Nothing!Every decision I made regarding our relationship was a decision that I made because I cared about you; because I wanted so badly for you to succeed._

_Alex, even back then, I wanted you to be happy._

_I’m so sorry that now I’ll be part of your pain._

_Tonight, Linda will need to turn herself in.If she doesn’t they’ll hurt someone very important to her: her daughter.I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about her before—that I didn’t tell you about any of this._

_Per your case… ALFA is alive and well.I know they told you that it was over but its not.They’re coming; I saw their leader putting up what looked like lightning rods.I’m not sure how that ties in quite yet, but your smart Alex.I have no doubt that you’ll figure it out._

_I’m so sorry I won’t be there for you; that I need to leave.I need you to know that if I had a choice… well there wouldn’t be one.You would be my priority.Every time.You and my little girl._

_I love you so much Alex._

_There’s a thing you do, when people hurt you, or take you off guard.You shut down and push everyone away.You prepare yourself for war._

_Please don’t do that now.Not for me._

_I never wanted you hurt Alex; I wanted to make you happy… I loved your laugh… ~~I tried to~~ —I just really wanted you to be happy._

_You’re going to need ~~your friends~~ —your family for the upcoming battle.Talk to them Alex.Let them help you.I know this is going to sound stupid coming from me but… not everyone you love is going to hurt you.Not everyone you love is going to leave._

_Maggie was not your fault._

_Champ was not your fault._

_Alex: I was not your fault._

_You are the strongest person I know but I am so sorry you have to use your strength for this.I would have given almost anything to stay by your side._

_I need you to know that I love you.I know I keep saying it but I want you to believe it.I love who you are Alex; all of you.I’ve seen the best of you and the worst of you and I know exactly who you are.You’re irrational and angry; you have the best smile and you give the best hugs; you’re impatient but kind; you can be gentle but fierce; caring but hard; scared but brave; you are so beautiful Alex. You are the best thing that ever happened to me and you’re worth everything!_

_What is happening right now does not determine how I feel about you.Alex, it does not determine what you are worth because you are worth so much more than this.Than me.No matter what information you receive, please know that you are beyond what they did to me._

_What I feel for you surpasses any orders or missions… Alex, I am so in love with you._

_I love you.I love you.I love you._

_Yours always,_

_Linda Taylor_

_~*~_

 

It might not have been Alex’s best idea, walking into CatCo like this, but she needed to be seen.Needed Lillian to know she had come here.

Lena’s security team held her downstairs in a small cramped room that they used when they suspected someone of misconduct.The room was painted beige, had soft carpeting, a coffee table and a couch.A TV hung on the far wall, but it was turned off.

Instead Alex amused herself by trying to find faces in the odd swirling patterns in the paint.

It was a game she had played as a child, and while it freaked her out to think the faces might actually be real, it was an exciting thrill.Like a rollercoaster.

Or Russian Roulette.

Horrible ideas, but fun nonetheless.

It was almost an hour before Lena herself showed up, Lucy Lane walking in next to her, both wearing expressions of cold disinterest.

“You can leave us now.”Lena said as soon as she entered the room, the three burly men exchanging worried glances at her words.

But Lena was a Luthor; a billionaire and CEO in her own right… she would not repeat herself.

The men left, the shortest one, a hefty man with a man bun and close shaved beard handed her a walkie.“We’ll be right outside Ms. Luthor, call if you need us.”

Lena nodded her thanks, accepting the walkie and waiting for the door to close behind the last man before turning her attention back to Alex, her stance softening.Slightly.

Next to her Lucy rolled her eyes at Alex’s apparent lack of couth.

“Ms. Lane says that I should hear what you have to say.Alone.”

Alex rolled her lips, eyes darting to Lucy who was leaning against the closed door.“I wasn’t aware she was a fan.”

Lucy rolled her eyes again, the loose-fitting button up she was wearing shifting with her body as she leaned towards Alex.“Don’t be a dick right now.I haven’t slept in like a month and I’m too cranky to keep up with you.We’ve all been through hell and would much prefer that you leave the games for when this is all over.Say what you need.”

Lena said nothing but her eyes, staring unflinchingly at Alex, reflected her agreement.

“Ok,” Alex nodded, “then I’ll keep this short.You have a warehouse on the edge of the city.It’s got its own security and is basically used to hold nothing but your failed prototypes.I need you to repurpose it.”

Lena frowned, arms crossing and hip jutting to the side.“For what exactly?”

“A refugee camp.”Alex stood, her jean clad calves resting against the front of the sofa, hand digging through her hair.“For aliens.”

“Interesting PR move.”Lucy said, her eyes suspicious.“Alex you do realize you were just released from a maximum-security _federal_ prison – under very shady circumstances— _because_ you were helping aliens, right?”

“Yes.”Alex confirmed, “I do.”

Lucy shook her head.“Then what the hell?You want to take Lena down with you?The rest of CatCo while you’re at it?What’s your play?”

“I don’t ever remember caring all that much about what other people thought.It was my opinion that as long as someone has a decent moral compass then they were worthy of my respect.I believe that’s how we became friends.”Alex gave Lucy a hard look and the woman had the grace to look away, her cheeks coloring.Sighing, Alex switched her gaze between the two women before dropping it to her clenched fingers.“I know I’m asking for a lot.I’m asking you to put a target on your back.But these are good people who have been through hell.I thought that the two of you could understand that.”

Lena finally relaxed completely, now seeming more tired than argumentative.“I do understand that, and I’d have a target on my back whether I helped you with this or not.That’s not the issue; Cat Grant was just murdered Alex.I’m now the CEO of L-Corp and the acting CEO of CatCo Worldwide.I can’t afford to lose even the smallest traction right now, or everything Cat worked for will be gone.I’m sorry but I’m going to need more than your word that these are “good people” in a “bad situation” to have that on my conscience.”

Alex rolled her head on her neck, shifting her feet for a moment before reaching into the bag she had brought with her.Lena tensed but Lucy just looked at her like she’d lost her mind.

The tablet felt heavy as Alex handed it over, uncertainty making her feel trapped.If this went badly… if Lena sided with her mother…

_That’s why you have J’onn._ Her inner voice said, _he can take care of that if it happens.Kara needs you; you have to start trusting people._

Steeling herself, Alex focused her attention on Lena’s face, watching the CEO like a hawk.

“What is this?”Lena asked, fingers swiping against the screen.

“It’s your mother’s greatest work.At least that’s what she calls it.I call it inhumane and sociopathic, but you know… to each their own.”

Lucy looked over Lena’s shoulder, her lip curling in distaste at what she saw.“CADMUS?”

Alex nodded.“The one and only.They’ve been experimenting on aliens, metas, _and_ humans for at least a decade.I’m going to free them.”Lena looked up at her and Alex met her gaze dead on.“They’ll need someplace to go.I can get them out, but I can’t give them the kind of help you can.The resources you have… you can help them get citizenship, housing, _jobs…”_ Alex turned to Lucy, knowing the note of pleading had entered her voice but unable to eradicate it at the moment.“They’ll need a damn good lawyer too.They’ll need both of you.”

Lena exhaled noisily, another shared look passing between her and her lawyer.“How do you know I won’t just call my mother as soon as you leave?I am a Luthor after all.Aliens are supposed to be my enemies.”

“But they’re not.”Alex argued, taking the tablet from Lena for a moment and opening a folder.She handed the device back and waited for Lena to see what she wanted her to see.“Your mother did that to your best friend.She’s going to kill her.Unless I stop her.”

“Linda isn’t—”

“Her name is Kara.”Alex interrupted, throat tight and studiously ignoring Lucy’s sharp eyes snapping to her.The letter that Mon-El had delivered lay heavy in her jacket pocket and it took everything inside of her not to palm it in her hand.“Her name is Kara and she’s been experimented on since she was just sixteen years old.She’s—when she attacked National City… went after Cat?She did that on _your mother’s_ orders.She couldn’t control herself.She probably doesn’t even remember what happened.It wasn’t her Lena. You know it wasn’t her.”

Scowling, Lena shoved the tablet back at Alex, looking every bit as betrayed as Alex had felt.“Do I?How long did it take _you_ to come to that conclusion?”

“About 5 minutes.”Alex admitted.“ _After_ I had already spent a month in jail and been shown everything you just were.”She hesitated, licking her lips as she tried to word her next response.“I love her.Very much.And I know without a doubt that the woman I love is still in there, and she would not have done those things.Not unless she had no other choice.”Alex shrugged helplessly, her argument feeling weak even to her own ears.“She was your best friend Lena.She defended you when _everyone,_ myself included, thought you had helped Lex escape from prison.She stood by you.I’m just asking that you _think_ about standing by _her_ this time.”

There was a long stretch of silence, Lena refusing to meet Alex’s eyes and Lucy shifting next to her trying not to interrupt her.It was extremely awkward, and Alex felt her palms start to sweat.If Lena didn’t help she’d have to go to Bruce, but his resources were mainly tied in Gotham and Alex didn’t want to send traumatized vulnerable people to that psychotic city.

It'd be trading one evil for another.

At least National City had sunshine.

Finally, Lucy looked up, pushing herself off the wall as she came to stand in front of Alex.“She’s the one who saved Jon right?”

“Yes.”Alex acknowledged, heart thudding loudly in her chest.

“Then I’m in.A life for a life.We’ll see what happens after that.”

Alex nodded, her thanks clear on her face as she turned to take in Lena.Lucy’s offer was great, but it would be moot without the CEO’s assistance.

Huffing, Lena rolled her eyes.“Fine.I’ll help.I’ll repurpose the warehouse and set up resources for them—but they all get vetted!”She insisted, finger jabbing at Alex.“ _All_ of them.I understand nothing is foolproof, but I refuse to help an alien with a grudge hurt _anyone._ They get vetted and then we place them.”

“Understood.”Alex agreed, a smile tickling her lips.“Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me yet.You still have to pull this off.If I know my mother, she probably already thinks you’re plotting against her.”

“Oh, I’m counting on it.”

Lena shook her head, but Alex saw her lips twitch.“Did you see her?Linda?Did you—?”

“Yeah.”Alex said, leaving off the part that she had helped hurt her.“We’re not working with a lot of time here Lena…”

Lena’s eyes flashed, nostrils flaring at the implications.“Give me 2 days.” And then she was doing her signature power walk out of the room.

Lucy stayed behind, waiting for the door to close before scoffing and tugging Alex into a hug.“You big dummy, you couldn’t have sent an e-mail?I could have at least warmed her up for you.”

“I wasn’t aware that you had that kind of power.”Alex returned, her arms banding around her arch-nemesis.“Thank you, Luce.I know how hard you tried.It means everything.”

“Oh whatever Danvers.Don’t get mushy on me now.”Lucy said, shoving Alex’s shoulder so that she stumbled.“It’s not like you’re important or anything.”

Alex grinned.“I was important enough that you haven’t slept in a month.”

“You were important enough that I didn’t sleep for about 2 weeks.”Lucy admitted with a blush.“The rest of that was Lena.”

“Lena?”Alex’s brow arched, confusion making her mind slow.“What does she have to—oh. _Oh._ Well ok then.” She rolled her lips, fighting the smile and nodded.“Congratulations.”

Unable to contain it anymore she felt her grin stretch her face and she had to fight to keep the bark of laughter inside.

“Shut it.”Lucy said, the red on her cheeks stretching across her chest.

“I remember a certain amount of teasing when our roles were reversed.”Alex accused, smiling and dodging the punch Lucy threw at her.She chuckled and landed her own blow to Lucy’s shoulder.“I’m just happy, you’re happy doofus.You deserve to be happy.”

Lucy shook her head again.“Just shut it Danvers.

“Does she know?” Alex questioned, feeling her smile dim slightly as she allowed herself to feel some concern.“About…”She made a vague gesture to Lucy’s person.

Lucy blushed but nodded.“Yeah… She’s fine with it.Better than fine actually… It’s barely even a thing.”

Alex grabbed her arm and pulled her into a tight hug.“Well maybe happy endings really do exist.”

“We’ll find yours Danvers.”Lucy said as she squeezed her back.“I promise.”

She shooed Lucy away after that, walking with more of a bounce in her step as she exited CatCo and turned the corner into a brick wall.

Fucking Daxamites.

Mon-El grabbed her arm and steered her into an alley, only Alex’s good mood saving him from permanent erectile dysfunction.

“You have like five seconds before I—”

“Are you planning a heist without me?”

Feeling a headache come on, Alex pinched her brows between pointer and thumb and shook her head.“Mon-El…”

“M’gann keeps skirting around the bar!And she made herself a friggin costume.You know I’ve always wanted to be part of a heist!”

“First off, you were there when we were planning it.You were just too sloshed to have a clue!”Mon-El opened his mouth to respond and Alex quickly clamped a hand over his mouth.“And second, it’s not just a heist.It’s an incredibly important mission that I wouldn’t trust you to be a part of even if you were sober.”She released him, feeling marginally bad at his genuinely hurt expression.“You’re me a year ago, and that girl… Mon-El that girl got a lot of people hurt.I can’t afford to have her anywhere near this, I’m sorry.”

She shook her head and walked away from him, leaving him glaring at the spot she had been standing in.Her feelings towards the oaf had always been complicated.Being able to understand someone who had a serious case of survivor’s guilt had been easy; watching someone destroy themselves because of an all-consuming guilt had been uncomfortably relatable; seeing someone refuse to help time and time again, using their abilities for their own selfish pursuits?

That had been a fear that had hit all to close to home.She understood Mon-El on a level few other people could.She just didn’t want to be him.

“I saved M’gann.”She’d made it to the mouth of the alley when he finally voiced his dissent.“If I’m such a fuck up... I _saved_ her.You _saw_ what I’m capable of.”

With an exasperated huff, Alex turned back to him continuing to walk backwards towards her destination. Mon-El was still such a kid sometimes, his maturity level never having progressed passed spoiled prince.She would blame his parents but there came a point in your life where you had to own up to your own shit.It was well passed time for Mon-El to have reached that point. “And I’ve saved the world Daxam.Fuck ups get lucky sometimes.I can’t count on luck anymore.You can’t be a part of this.”She shrugged, trying to comfort him for being isolated since she knew he wasn’t sad about not being asked to risk his life.He just didn’t want to be alone.“Cheer up Mon-El, you’ll have free run of the bar while we’re away.You can take those girls into the back room like you like and M’gann will never know.”

With those parting words, she exited the alley and made her way towards her next destination.She had been telling Mon-El the truth.She needed to get this right.She couldn’t afford any casualties.Everything had to be perfect.

But when this was over?She’d take him aside and have a serious conversation about getting his life together.Daxam was gone; he wasn’t.He needed to accept that and forge a new path, however difficult and painful it may be.

 

~*~

 

The next four days contained endless clouds, extreme training, and exercises in bullshitting at CADMUS, paired quite nicely with extreme planning and sleep deprivation at night.Surprisingly she found the clouds to be the most concerning of the lot and had asked Lucy to ask Lena to take a closer look at it.There had been a snide remark but Alex had been too tired to fire back in kind.She finally experienced burn out on the 5th day and fell asleep for a solid 5 hours at her lab bench.She was awakened by something prodding at her mind.

Her literal mind, not her head.It was an odd sensation that Alex had only ever experienced with J’onn but ever since she had set foot in CADMUS she’d been getting a similar feeling.It’s how she knew that CADMUS was 36 stories deep; it was like someone had just dropped the information in her head.

It was convenient.If a little intrusive.

This time, Alex didn’t mind the intrusion.The nagging feeling bringing her to consciousness, giving her a sense of impending doom and a pressing need to check in on Kara.

4 guards.

There would be four guards.

She had just blinked herself into full consciousness, palms rubbing at her eyes, when an extremely high-strung looking lab tech arrived on scene.His lab coat was rumpled, his hair was disheveled, and he smelled strongly of someone who hadn’t showered in days.His shaking arms and wobbly voice added to the effect and only served to grate on Alex’s nerves.

“Dr. Danvers… I’m really sorry but Ms. Luthor would like to speak to you now.” 

Releasing an impressive yawn, Alex stretched her arms up to the ceiling.“Of course, she does.”She stood, keeping a hold on the table in front of her to stop the change in elevation from laying her on her ass.“Could you please not come in my lab without an invite anymore?Your drug use is distracting.”

The small man blanched, the clipboard in his hand rising in front of him like a shield.“Drug use?”He sputtered, “I would never—”

“Save it please.None of my business.Not your boss.If you ever want help though, I’ll put you in touch with nicer people than me.”

And with those generous words Alex gestured to the man to lead her to Lillian Luthor.

Lillian was in a control room, one of the many that CADMUS had; there appeared to be about 2 to 3 per floor and they were used to conduct experiments in a controlled environment.Lillian and her stooges would stand behind ballistic proof glass and torture their victims in the other room.

Alex fiddled with the watch on her wrist, whatever Lillian wanted her for was not going to be pretty.

Steeling herself she strode up with faux confidence, standing next to Lillian and looking into the empty room.“This is fascinating.Truly.I personally would go for a more neutral color—I mean white?Who wants to stare at that all day?Maybe a soft blue?Or some baby greens?”

“Your mind does take some getting used to Dr. Danvers.”Lillian said, her lips quirking into a soft smile.“I read through your research, your findings are going to change the world.”The woman nodded her head and a set of guards frog-marched a purple alien into the empty room.The alien was short, barely able to reach Alex’s waist if they had been next to each other and had bony ridges down the center of its head.Despite its difference in appearance, Alex was clearly able to see the fear on the being’s face.

Another gesture from Lillian and the alien was strapped down and injected with a blue serum.Alex’s serum.

“This is the 4th attempt today and we haven’t been able to reproduce the results you claim we should have.I was hoping you could take a closer look.”Alex nodded and made to move over to the screens with the biological readings when Lillian stopped her with a hand to her shoulder.“No dear, I meant in there.”

Lillian flicked her chin towards the alien and Alex fought to keep her face relaxed, quirking a nonchalant eyebrow as if the request were odder than anything else.“Of course.”

She moved easily in to the room, allowing her mouth to form a frown when the purple alien was removed and a large metal crate was brought in.Heavy thuds sounded as whatever they were keeping in the crate, launched itself at the sides.Alex moved her hands behind her back, clasping her hands together to hide the slight tremor.

2 guards stood on either side of the box, and a messed-up version of Hank Henshaw stood in front, hand on the latch.This version of Henshaw was like a Frankenstein monster gone bad; only a quarter of his face remained human, the rest of it made up of gleaming silver metal, heavy duty wiring and gleaming red lights.His torso was also cybernetic, along with an arm and a leg.As if someone had torn him apart limb from limb.

He smiled at her, the absence of any cheeks on his face making the expression look more like a baring of teeth than anything else.

“The funny thing about your healing serum Dr. Danvers is that you were able to create it so quickly.You were a DEO agent, we looked at your projects—this one was never listed.”Lillian was standing next to her, her eyes on the box in front of them even as she directed her words at Alex.

Alex shrugged, making her frown suspicious at Lillian’s line of questioning.“I don’t see how that’s relevant.As a scientist yourself, I’m sure you can appreciate why I would keep some things close to my chest.”

Lillian smiled and nodded, her gaze dropping to the floor for a moment before rising to Alex.“Personal gain.Yes, I can respect that.Unfortunately, I don’t see that being the case here.That technology was based off of Kryptonian genetics; a design flaw in your plan of misdirection?Not that you were very careful… Why _did_ you visit my daughter?”Alex said nothing, internally preparing herself for the storm ahead and Lillian nodded as if disappointed.“I’ve been studying Kryptonians for the better part of a decade.Me and my son.”

Lex Luthor took that as his cue to enter the room, dressed immaculately in a fitted steel grey suit.His bald head glistening under the fluorescent lighting made him appear that much more unappealing.Not that he needed much help, Alex already hated him on principle.

Her absolute abhorrence to anything Luthor was well solidified at this point.Lena should really change her name.

Alex remained silent and Lillian’s smile dropped from her face, disappointment making her shake her head.

“I understand why you placed that necklace on her.At the time you thought you were in love.You know better now.”Lillian sighed and then nodded to her freakshow Henshaw.The cyborg grabbed the large bar keeping the crate closed and pulled, the sound of metal grating on metal screeching in Alex’s ears and causing her to flinch.Shortly after the bar was removed, the front side of the crate fell forward and a pale, barely clothed, shaking body sprawled out in front of them; one eye glowing blue, the other a deadly red.The guards pulled batons from their backs, the ends crackling with an electric green energy.Kara hissed at them, her torso wrapped in a flimsy white cloth that was torn in multiple places and exposed bruised patches of skin.Alex could already tell that the alien had injured herself in trying to escape; that CADMUS had chosen that cloth so that she could not injure herself further.Suicide watch.The thought sent chills down Alex’s spine.Kara moved to all fours as she tried to make sense of her new environment, eyes clouded with fear and confusion.The Kryptonian looked like a wild animal trying to escape captivity.“I would very much like you to take the necklace off now.”

Alex again said nothing, her fingers clenching around each other behind her back.Lex moved behind her and kicked her in the back of the legs, dropping her to her knees.

“K-2S0.”The man’s voice rang through the room and Alex fought the impulse to bite him as he grabbed her face.Kara’s eyes darted to him at the sound of the name and she snarled a warning, daring him to come close to her.She looked downright feral, like something caged and beaten.But not broken.They hadn’t managed to break her quite yet. “You love this woman?Come and save her.”Lex taunted, the question obviously rhetorical as he slammed his fist into the back of Alex’s skull.

Her head exploded in pain and she couldn’t stop her hands from rising to clutch at the point of contact.Lex chuckled, his hand landing solidly on the back of her neck and tugging her back into a kneeling position.

Kara screamed her fury, moving to face him head on but she was grabbed unceremoniously by the back of her neck and thrown backwards by Henshaw.The guard closest to her poked his baton into her shoulder and she convulsed on the floor with hard jerks.

“There’s nothing you can do.”Lex taunted.“You are weak.I’m going to kill her and make you watch.”

He pulled out a knife and sliced Alex’s cheek, Kara wailing at the sight of her blood and trying futilely to reach her.

Alex clenched her teeth, trying to control her reactions… but it was torture.Watching them and doing nothing… 

This was the worst thing she had ever done.

The necessity of her actions did little to alleviate her guilt.

A minute later, Henshaw was pulling Kara up to mirror Alex’s position, tugging her close so he could whisper something in her ear.Kara looked exhausted and lost and angry and scared...Who knew how long they had kept her in that box?Alex knew from experience that prisoners left in solitary for more than a few days experienced detrimental effects.Kara had been here for more than a month.

Alex was going to kill every last single one of these fuckers.

Henshaw pulled Kara closer, his metal mouth still moving with whispered words that made her face fall even further.

And then he hit her; it was barely a hit to be honest, but in her weakened state, it still sent Kara to the floor and Henshaw into a fit of laughter.

Alex reared up at the display of violence but was unceremoniously shoved back down by Lex Luthor’s hand and a cattle prod to her side.

She watched helplessly as Kara scrabbled to catch herself, obviously not having expected the blow and trying to get her bearings.

“Will you take it off Agent Danvers?She’ll suffer less, I promise you.”

Alex had almost forgotten that Lillian Luthor was in the room but once the woman spoke, all of her hatred came rushing back.“Go to hell.”She sneered, struggling against Lex’s hold on her shoulders.

Lillian smiled and nodded at Henshaw, Alex’s stomach sinking.

“Kara,” She pleaded, her voice rough and heart hammering.Necessary, she reminded herself, this part was absolutely necessary.“Kara, look at me.Look at me baby.It’s gonna be ok.I’m right here ok?We’re gonna be ok.”

Kara raised bleary eyes to her, the adrenaline she’d been surviving off of when she’d initially been released having dimmed.Her head rolled near uselessly on her shoulders and Alex was suddenly very afraid.

_Necessary,_ her inner voice whispered.

And then Kara winked, a small barely there gesture that was laced with exhaustion.

But not defeat.

Her girl was still in there.

Alex choked on a relieved laugh, her lips twitching in an almost smile seconds before Lex slammed his foot into her shoulder blade.The same shoulder she had dislocated just a month ago.

The joint didn’t snap thankfully, but the hit did send her to the ground, leaving her vulnerable to the cattle prods that came at her.

Her attackers were relentless, barely allowing her time to breath between pokes.

It was ok; Alex much preferred this, them focusing on her rather than Kara.

This fit much more into her plans.

But Kara was wailing again; not in pain—at least not physical pain—but it still was enough to let Alex know that they were running out of time.

Somehow, Kara worked herself loose of Henshaw’s hold, darting over to Alex and trying to cover her with her body.When Henshaw caught up to her, he ripped her away and literally flung her like a can of soda.The blonde’s body made impact with the opposite wall, creating a small dent that slowed her descent.

Alex grabbed one of the Cattle prods, ignoring the pain coursing through her body, Kara’s attack serving as enough of a distraction for her to turn the electricity on one of the guards.He dropped to his knees and Alex had almost reached the other guard before Lex had back handed her across the face, his foot pressing into her back.

Kara attacked again and was again beaten back, the weakness clearly showing in her actions now.

Alex moved, forcing her arms under her and squirming around the shoe enough that she was able to roll over and kick up at the man above her.He dodged her blows and she swung her legs around and under herself so that she could stand.She was barely on her feet before she felt something at her back; the pain so intense that she couldn’t decide if it was heat or ice that had rendered her side useless.

Kara screamed again launching herself at Henshaw to stop his heat vision and was slammed down by a hand at her throat.She writhed, fingers scrabbling at the fingers around her neck as Henshaw _squeezed._

Alex dodged the first blow by Lex, ducking under his arm and landing a punch of her own to his solar plexus.He slid backwards and she followed the move with a kick to his head.

Lex caught her leg and twisted, her body forced to turn or break.

Another scream pierced the air and Alex allowed herself to be distracted enough by it that Lex was able to draw her in close enough to land a hit to her face.She wound up on her knees again and this time Lex pulled his own baton from his waist. Alex managed to roll under the first blow but then the guards, who had resumed poking at Kara, moved to stand in front of her while Henshaw dealt with the Kryptonian.

Lillian pressed a few buttons on her watch and a green glow emerged from the ceiling.

Kryptonite.

Fuck.

Alex ran simulations through her brain, trying to track the time versus Kara’s health… 

Kara went quiet, her body going slack under Henshaw.

So not a lot of time then.

Fuck.

“It turns out we’ve been going about this all wrong; K-2S0 no longer seems to care what happens to herself.And she knows that K-3S9 is too valuable an asset to damage in the long run.You however… if I want that necklace off, then I need to have my asset back and the only way to do that is to increase the stakes… Dr. Danvers I need you to understand that this is not personal.”Lex was gleeful as he stated the words and Lillian nodded to her henchman, Alex’s body suddenly seized by 50k volts of electricity.

Felicity would _not_ be pleased.

At least she was a good distraction.

 

~*~

“Y.R.P… in position.”

Winn blinked owlishly down at his laptop screen, the light from the monitor illuminating the van in a blue glow.“Did she just…”

“Best not to think about it.”Kate interrupted, moving effortlessly across the rooftops as she made her final jump with Catwoman to the building across from their destination.“You ready?”

Harley tittered over the comms, her initial statement obviously still amusing the apparent video game nerd.And ok, Winn may have just developed a slight crush.

Next to her, Selina smirked, her only acknowledgement before she calmly walked back a few feet and then ran full tilt at the building across from them.

It was a lengthy jump, an impossible feat for normal humans and Kate felt a protest lodge in her throat as the black cat flirted with death.It was hardly something she thought should be played with at the moment.

Nevertheless, Catwoman was then spreading her arms, little bat wings emerging from her suit and allowing her more precision as she easily glided the last few meters and soundlessly landed on the smooth glass exterior of the building.Apparently, she had also stolen the suctioning tech they used to scale buildings.

“Did she just…”

“Winn.”Kate huffed, knowing that asking where Selina had even gotten access to her and Bruce’s tech would be a fruitless exercise.Bruce’s weak spot for women was beyond notorious.Selina had probably licked his ear and he had given her whatever she wanted.“Are you sure the sensors on that window are down Winn?”

“Kate.”Winn imitated her huff and she had to fight the smile that threatened to stretch her face.

“Then Catwoman, do you think we could move this along?”

Selina flipped her off, the claws of her right hand extending as she dragged her finger in a circle on the glass.Her left hand meanwhile pressed flat to the glass above her head, increasing the suction to hold her weight outside of the lines of her circle, just as she completed her rotation.

The glass fell forward and would have dropped and shattered to the ground and alerted their hosts of their unexpected arrival but apparently the Cat had placed suction cups on her feet as well and the heavy glass swung forward with her legs, attached to her boots.Her left arm took the brunt of her weight for a few seconds before she was swinging her body and rotating so that she landed inside in a handstand position, slowly and gracefully lowering her legs until she could detach her feet from the glass.

All told, it had taken Catwoman less than 5 minutes to infiltrate a supposedly non-infiltratable building.

Maybe Alex really was on to something…

Kate didn’t have much time to dwell on it as, soon after the glass had been broken, Harley was dropping from a set of random vines that appeared and swinging herself across a 10-foot gap.The acrobat’s body twisted into a straight vertical slingshot and she landed effortlessly next to her friend, the duo high fiving their success.

Kate rolled her eyes.

In comparison, her shooting a batarang into the carpeted ground at their feet and propelling herself over the attached carbine wire was hardly as impressive.It still got the job done.It was a success all its own as a large part of Kate wanted to turn tail and run back to Maggie; see if there had been any changes.Her fiancée had been taken off of her respirator that afternoon, finally breathing on her own even though she had shown no further signs of waking up.It had still been a huge win in Kate’s book.

Alex had taken the opportunity to play all of the new superhero movies on replay, back to back.Maggie had _hated_ the movies since there had been one to many copycats that had made her job insanely more difficult and annoying after their releases.Alex was hoping she’d be annoyed enough to wake up and shut them off.

Kate wasn’t passed trying the ridiculous proposal; she just wanted her fiancée back.

“Ok, Ivy.Keep your eyes up.Make sure we have a way out.”

Harley giggled, her glove hand covering her mouth at what she thought was a joke.Kate had been very serious.They had no idea what they were dealing with here and were going to need a definite exit in case of emergency.

Harley didn’t exactly know what such an emergency might be.No one besides the joker had ever really been much trouble for her.

At least not permanent trouble.

Putting that out of her head too, Kate led them into the wide bank of hallways that appeared when they exited the room.Gesturing for Harley to take the left side and Selina to join her on the right.Of the three of them, Harley had super strength and a shit ton of random weapons and tricks that she pulled from seemingly nowhere.She wouldn’t need the extra hands.

It was pretty uneventful for almost a half hour after that.The teams checking in with each other as they cleared each room, randomly stopping to place a blinking device near any open vents they came across.And then Kate saw a light under a door and gestured for Selina to stop.

The Cat saw what she was looking at, frowned, and kicked the door down.Kate scowled and followed her in, handling the two shocked men on the right side of the room as Selina jumped and twisted over the other three.

Wholly unnecessary. That had been wholly unnecessary!Selina may be a daredevil with no care in the world, but Kate still had responsibilities.She had a fiancée who was actually showing signs of improvement.She wasn’t going to risk that small perfect chance of a future on some stupid stunt!

The red headed vigilante had just turned to tell Selina so, when she spotted the small child in the corner of the room.

The girl was short, maybe just past the age of a toddler, with a buzzcut of fine blonde hair and a stubborn lower lip that jutted out slightly.She was staring up at the two women with startlingly clear blue eyes.Otherworldly blue eyes that were more turquoise in tone; gorgeous and innocent and _oh my god my ovaries_ , Kate thought.

“Aww.”Harley pushed passed them into the room, crouching in front of the girl and offering her hand.“You’re the cutest kid I’ve ever seen in my whole damn life.Red!I want one!What’s your name sweetheart?”

The child didn’t answer, her head tilting slightly as she took Harley in.Then she smiled, the adorable toddler smile that Kate saw in magazines with small gaps where she had started to lose baby teeth.Her small hand reached out and touched Harley’s white cheek, the makeup smudging slightly at the brief interruption.

Harley ‘awed’ again and opened her arms.Surprisingly the girl went willingly, and the pair embraced cheerfully, Harley standing and swinging the girl in her arms.

The child let out a small giggle, the sound slightly odd but still cute.It still made the girl halt abruptly, her small hand pressing against her mouth as if expecting to be chastised.

The implications made Kate’s blood boil.

Harley took her hand away, frowning as the girl flinched at the motion.She palmed the girl’s cheek, her voice serious but kind.“You shouldn’t fear me Pumpkin; you don’t have to be afraid of anyone ever again ok?”

Vibrant blue eyes blinked slowly, the stubborn lip being pulled between small teeth.Harley smiled kindly and pulled a teddy bear from her breast area.

Like her literal breast area.

Where Kate had been sure nothing could survive the tight fit, including said breasts.Just pulled a damn stuffed teddy out.

Kate wasn’t going to ask questions.She wasn’t.

Uh uh.

“Guys!” Winn’s voice sounded over their headsets, interrupting the moment and bringing a sense of urgency.“We have company.You have to get out of there, now!”

Kate frowned, lowering her goggles and peering through the walls.

Dagnabbit.

That was a lot of men.

“Ready?”She asked, turning to Selina, who already had her claws out and her smile on.

“I’m really going to need you to stop asking me that, handsome.”

Kate rolled her eyes, allowing Selina to leap out of the room and tackle the first guy with a crotch to the face.She went low, taking out the next guy with a slide and kick to the shins.When he fell, she slammed her elbow into the back of his head, knocking him out.

“Ok sweetie,” Harley was saying, “it’s gonna get a little loud so we just need you to wear these ok?”

The hard jab she threw at the next guy almost went wide as Chop Suey by System of a Down exploded over her headset.

_I don’t think you trust in my self-righteous suicide.I! Cry! When angels deserve to die!_

What the actual h-e-double hockey sticks?

“Winn!”She dodged a blow to the head, grabbing the top of a gun and shoving it down as the would-be shooter took aim at Selina. She ripped the weapon from the guy’s hold, slamming it back into his chest and then slamming her foot into his chest so that he fell backwards into his companion.“Who the fuck chose this song?She’s just a kid!”

_Why’d you leave the keys up on the table?YOU WANTED TO!_

“It wasn’t me!”The man screeched, Harley’s cackle sounding loud and clear before a humbler tune interrupted the rock song.

_It’s time to get funky, funky, funky, funky, funky…_

Selina twisted around a woman, ripping off her helmet and digging her claws into her face.She dropped like a stone and Kate gave her a look.

“Calm down batsy.”Selina said with an eye roll.“It’s a sedative not a poison.And why the fuck am I listening to the cha-cha slide?”

Behind them the child—she refused to call her K-3S9—was happily hugging her new toy, the headphones on her ears blocking out the sounds of the fight.

Harley had her up on her shoulders as she swung around a fucking mallet and took out two to three guys at a time.

Where the heck had she—

No.Not asking. Not interested.

Focused.

She was getting back to Maggie, so she had to stay focused.

She took out two more guys from their side, the path starting to clear when Harley cursed—loudly.

“Hey Kittycat!CATCH!”

Selina rolled over her assailant’s back, arms stretched and caught the child that Harley had just _tossed_ through the air.The girl giggled happily at the game, seemingly unbothered by the violence taking place around her.

The Cat snuggled the child close before holding her like a football as a tall brunette woman came at her with knives.Kate was engaged with a short bulky man who just would _not_ go down.He grabbed her short cape, twisting her up in it and pulling it back against her throat.She screamed her frustration as she finally had enough and pressed her thumb back into his eye.He howled in pain, and she stepped on his instep, swung herself around and tasered him in the junk.

_Cha-cha real smooth._

Maybe that would teach him to just politely go unconscious next time.

_Turn around._

The last douchebag aimed his military grade rifle at Selina.Kate leapt in front of him as he pulled the trigger, the material of her cape protecting her from the artillery as her leg shot out and kicked the gun high.

Selina meanwhile had thrown the child at her assailant who flailed at the toddler being used as a projectile and allowed Catwoman to slip in and hit about ten different pressure points.Her body now immobile, she dropped and Selina caught the child before she hit the ground.

“Weeeee.”The woman breathed, rolling into a standing position with a huge smile in place.The girl only laughed again, and Kate took the time to glare at the gunman.

“You were gonna shoot a _child?”_ The guy looked at her in terrified amazement and Kate shook her head at him in disappointment.A trick batarang had him tied up and dangling from the ceiling in short order.“You need to seek professional help.You’re a monster sir.”

She patted the man’s cheek twice before punching him in the face, his now limp body swinging with the blow.

Tuning back into Harley’s fight almost had her running to help.

Almost.

As it turned out, Harley had the situation well in hand.

It was still understandable that she had ditched the kid.

Her mallet lay in pieces in her hand, and she was sporting a rage filled pout, the makeup on one cheek smeared completely off.

Harley took great pride in her makeup.

The man who was attacking her was an enormous lug, and Kate recognized him as Bane; a vastly muscled man on some sort of respirator who had succeeded in breaking Batman’s back.

No big deal.

He lumbered towards Harley with his hands up and out; a fighter’s stance.Despite his obvious experience, he was unable to lay a hand on Harley Quinn.The woman moved with lightning fast reflexes, using Bane’s body as her playground and giggling hysterically when he missed her.A particularly embarrassing moment for Bane came when Harley did a handstand on his shoulders, and when he reached to grab her wrists, they were no longer there.The acrobat had launched herself into a flip, quick enough to propel her legs out into a harsh kick that landed square in Bane’s back.

Kate knew Harley had done it on purpose.Despite the Siren’s morally grey belief system, they each had a soft spot for the Bat family and would have taken Batman’s injuries seriously.Akin to someone picking on their little brother.

Well, Selina probably didn’t think little brother.Selina probably thought long term booty call, but still.The implication being that Bruce was family.

Bane had messed with family so he needed to be taught a lesson; Harley had apparently been waiting a long time to teach it to him.

Bane roared in anger and charged, his feet meeting the ground with heavy thuds that shook the hall.Then the clown smirked, not even flinching as her hands became a blur, wrapping tightly around his arm.The acrobat’s body swung up, her legs wrapping around the arm and her torso twisting enough that the guy lost his balance and fell.Hard.Harley had just used Bane’s arm like a stripper pole!

Grunting with effort, Harley held Bane in an arm bar, her feet pressing against his chin as she pulled on his wrist.He howled in pain, the cry sharpening when Harley jerked and snapped his arm in two.Three hard kicks to the head and his breathing apparatus snapped with the force of Harley’s strength.A hissing sound filled the room, and Harley used the opportunity to release the now broken arm and pull a rubber duck from her pocket.She stuffed the toy in the man’s mouth, tucked herself into a roll and with a loud boom, Bane was no longer an issue.

“Well that’s done.”Selina said, the child now resting her head on Catwoman’s shoulder, arms wrapped around her neck.

A large crash came from behind them and as one, the trio ran in the opposite direction, Selina slinging the child down onto her back.

Kate thought that might have saved her life.The ceiling caved in, in front of them, making them stumble to a halt.Selina leaning back harshly as the front of her suit was singed from the wall of flames that erupted in their path.

Scratch that.Not flames.

Heat vision.

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!

Pulling herself back up from the forced tumble she’d propelled herself into, Kate rose to her feet to stare up at the chipped grey form of Bizarro.Because of course.

Of course, a damn Kryptonian in a bottle would be standing between her and her future.She wondered idly if this is how Maggie felt, facing certain doom and still gritting her teeth to try to get home to Kate.She thought it was.

Her heart twinged at the thought of her fiancée, lying near death in a stupid hospital bed because some super villain nerds decided that they wanted to play at a world take over.

Talk about not taking no for an answer.

Bizarro charged them, easily catching Harley by the throat and flinging her down the hall, through the wall, and _out_ of the building.

Kate had little time to worry for her team mate however, leaping to the side to avoid a fatal encounter with the woman’s freeze breath.

A growl of frustration ripped from deep within the experiment’s chest and she sped over to Selina, who maneuvered the child around her hips as if in a swing dance and tossed her to Kate before being hit square in the chest.The woman let out a grunt, dropping her weight to the ground and digging her claws into Bizzaro’s thighs.

Or at least she tried to.The metal appendages didn’t even leave a scratch and Bizarro slammed her foot down at Catwoman’s skull.Only the reinforced armor that she wore as a mask saving her head from being crushed in.

Her foe down, Bizarro turned blazing red eyes to Kate who had taken off down the opposite corridor.She was met with men with guns, and she bared her teeth in a grimace, stooping with the child in her arms and sweeping her cape around her in a pathetic last attempt to protect her.

A hand grabbing her by the back of the neck almost startled her, and she found herself thrashing in midair as Bizarro lifted her bodily off the floor.

The girl stared up at her with wide blue eyes, a puzzled frown on her face as she took in everything around her; her thumb hovering around her lip as her other hand held her new teddy bear limply at her side.

When her eyes landed back on Kate her scowl was something fierce.

Kate decided Linda Jr. would be a good name for the girl as in that moment she looked almost _exactly_ like her mother.It was slightly eerie.

Or that could have been the glowing eyes of cerulean _fire_.

Maybe.

Working in Gotham and with the JLU, Kate had been exposed to many different Meta’s and many different aliens.She’d seen Superman’s heat vision.

It wasn’t like this.

She’d never seen anything like this.

It wasn’t two beams of intense infrared lasers searing holes into flesh.

This was a _wave_ of laserized _fire_ that swept across the hallway and _obliterated_ everything in its path.Soldiers literally vanished in the inferno, the survivors having ducked under the wave and scrabbling to pull discarded bodies on top of them.

Linda Jr. halted her heat vision, but not her attack, the little girl zooming over to the remaining men and taking them out one by one.Kate didn’t _see_ her mind you, she was too fast to track with the human eye.All she knew was that the hallway that had been full of CADMUS lackeys was now full of unconscious bodies and Linda Jr.’s little body was trembling with rage right in the middle of it.The child super sped over to Bizarro quicker than Kate had time to be _shocked_ and wrapping her arms around the woman like a baby chimp.

Bizarro hissed, wriggling as she fought to swat the girl away, Kate’s body jiggling as it was brought along for the ride.

Then the movement just stopped, Bizzaro’s grip clenching enough that Kate thought her life was about to end, before a small hand dug between her skin and Bizzaro’s and _wrenched._

Kate dropped, her head snapping up to take in _what the hell had just happened._

Linda Jr. was still wrapped tightly around Bizarro, except now there were fucking spikes coming from the child’s body and piercing randomly into the woman in her hold.

Kate watched with a dropped jaw as the spike’s retracted _into_ the kid and Linda Jr. dropped to her feet glaring daggers at the unmoving CADMUS agents.

“Well draw me a picture and call me French.”Harley was climbing back through the window, slightly rumpled but none the worse for wear and looking at Linda Jr. like she’d just met her idol.“Hey Red, I wanna keep her.”

Then the girl clutched her head, dropping to her knees as actual _blood_ poured from her eyes.

“Winn.”Kate shouted, grabbing the child in her arms and sprinting for the window Harley had just climbed out of.“You need to shut that signal down _now!”_

_“_ I’m on it!I’m on it!”Rapid typing filtered through her headset and she barely glanced behind her to check on Harley, knowing the woman was grabbing Selina’s still form.

She exploded out of the window, Linda Jr. clutched to her chest as she allowed herself to drop for a moment.A slide of vines emerged beneath her and she rode them down to street level and the waiting van.

Pamela Isley was already waiting, her eyes wide with concern as she saw the now seizing child in Kate’s arms.The woman known as Poison Ivy had a weird helmet like device in her hands and she gently wrapped Linda Jr’s head in it.

Winn stabbed at his keys and just like that the seizing stopped.

Harley landed behind them, Selina still out of it across her shoulders.“You sure there was no one else in that hellhole?”

“It’s all clear.”Pam said.“I’ve got about twenty different plants that tell me everyone else is an evil asshole.Although after that display, you don’t have to wonder why there was such a heavy guard presence.”

“I’ll say,” Kate murmured, staring down at the child in her arms and wiping away red from the cherubic cheeks.“I don’t think CADMUS was trying to keep people out so much as they were trying to keep her _in.”_ She glanced up at Winn, sliding further in the van as Harley dumped Selina in the back and moved to the driver’s seat.Pam started fussing over the Cat, pouring odd goop and potions down her throat.“Do you have a name yet?For the girl?”

He shook his head, eyes still on his screens as he detonated the gas bombs that Harley had left behind.Taking down CADMUS meant _catching_ CADMUS.The gas would keep the people in the building knocked out for at least 4 hours, giving the NCPD more than enough time to bag and tag the villains.

“There’s nothing in CADMUS’ data files except for K-3S9.It’s the only name on file.”

Kate nodded, holding the unconscious girl tight to her chest as they made a particularly sharp turn.“Linda Jr. it is.Any word from the other team?”

Winn’s face was tight with tension but he answered in the affirmative.“Yeah, everything’s going exactly to plan.

~*~

“Bro…”

“Right?!”

“Bro…”

“I know!”Beastboy squealed, hands clasped in front of him as the Titans emerged on the lowest level CADMUS. After Raven had dropped off the other teams, the Titans had arrived at their own rendezvous point, somehow being trusted to work by themselves. Evacuate from the ground up.Those were their orders.But geeking out about being a part of such a covert high-profile mission complete with evil lair?

Totally acceptable.

_“If you two are quite done, I’m going to need you to get this show on the road.Our timeline might have moved up a bit.”_

Robin cleared his throat and pressed his hand to his earpiece.“Understood Overwatch, we’re going to the furthest cell now.Evacuations are underway.Tell Manhunter he is clear for action.”

_“I’m pretty sure he doesn’t need the approval but I’ll let him know you’re all in place.”_

“Yep.”Robin agreed, fighting the urge to face palm. “Sure thing ma’am.”

Raven quirked her eyebrow at him, Cyborg behind her messing with a control panel on the wall.“Ma’am?”

Robin sighed, this leader stuff might be a little tougher than he previously thought.

 

~*~

“Are you sure that I should be here?”

Oliver fought the urge to roll his eyes, exchanging a look with Sara as they continued to move through the lowest level of CADMUS.To their left Cisco Ramon rubbed his hands together nervously.

“It’s just—well over in National City, we mostly deal with Meta’s… evil Meta’s… like people that deserve to be locked up.Not people who humans mistreated and we need to save.We stop criminals, not—”

“Cisco,” Barry finally cut in, his hand resting on his friend’s shoulder.“These are criminals.These people—alien, meta, or otherwise—they all deserve better than this.This isn’t right.We’re helping people.Ok?”

“Right,” Cisco nodded, “yes, ok.”

Barry nodded, and then pointed over at the hallway.“I’m gonna go clear a path.Felicity we good?”

“ _We are perfect, my little red speedster.Run Forest!”_

Sara smirked, Oliver huffing fondly at his wife’s antics and pressed himself against a wall, bow at the ready as Barry zoomed through the area and took out the guards.

The red blur appeared back next to them, a smile on his face.“Well that was easy.I don’t know what the big—”

Oliver released his arrow, the lab tech who had been about to press a panic button screaming in agony as it lodged in his shoulder.Sara made quick work of the rest of him, the White Canary catapulting over the tables and hitting him with her baton.

Barry swallowed. “Right, well… I was just trying to keep you guys on your toes you know?Cardio is such an undervalued—

Oliver brushed passed his friend, voice low as he took stock.“Barry?Shut up now.”

The lab tech had fallen unconscious, but his yell was enough to alert the prisoners that they had company.

Oliver frowned, lowering his bow and moving towards the nearest cell.

A small blonde girl glared at him with distrust, her face set in a glower.She couldn’t be any older than 12, and she was clearly human.She was also very clearly a prisoner, the collar around her throat leaving little to the imagination.What the hell was CADMUS up to?

“Felicity?”He asked, keeping Sara in his peripherals, the assassin’s face also angered by whatever was in the other cells.

_“I see her.Her name’s Tara Markov.She’s been there for 17 months.Powers listed are geokinesis.”_

The girl tilted her head at him, before simply retreating back to the thin mattress in her cell.She turned her back to him, obviously deciding that ignoring his presence was the way to go.The doors to the cells hissed open, Felicity finally succeeding in overriding the controls.

None of CADMUS’ prisoners tried to escape, no one moved.

Sara crouched down, her hand reaching out in encouragement.“Hey, it’s ok.We’re here to help.”

Nothing.

Barry appeared behind him, voice uneasy as he bounced on his feet.“Should I just take them?”

“I wouldn’t.”A short, stocky black woman emerged from her cell all the way at the end of the hall.Scratch that, from around the corner of the hall.There were _more_ people here?The woman hopped around as she struggled to get her foot in her shoe.“My roommates tend to lean to the distrusting side of things.And no offense you’re all a weird bunch of whiteys so… you kind of fit the profile.The costumes are a nice touch though.A little too halloweeny for my tastes but I mean I haven’t celebrated a holiday in years so I guess I can get into it.”She eyed Cisco up and down, patting him on the shoulder.“You’ll never get laid with those goggles buddy, but you have really cool hair.What’s your name?”

“Um, Vibe?”

“Well… at least you’re still young honey.”A small ball of orange fluff, scampered around the corner and knocked into her legs, tumbling around on all fours before it righted itself and tried again.She sighed heavily, shaking her head at the energetic thing.“Dude seriously?You’re embarrassing me in front of the wizards.”

Sara rose to her feet, taking in the newcomer as the woman lumbered over to them, stopping before Sara and resting her hands on her hips.The ball of orange that Oliver now recognized as a kitten still sliding along the marble floors behind her.

“I’m sorry,” he started, still unsure of what was happening, “but who are you?”

The woman grinned at him, folding her arms across her chest, the white hospital gown she was in crinkling at the move.“I’m Katu and this is Streaks; we’re gonna overthrow these Sons of Bitches.Wanna help?”

Cisco looked between the gob smacked faces of his team, Oliver doing his best to maintain his stoicism in the face of such confidence… and plagiarism.

“You totally got that from that new Avengers movie.”Cisco accused.“The one about the made-up superheroes.”

“Totally,” Katu agreed.“But it was also the Thor movie and I really need to see them in person because Sargent asshole over there went to sleep halfway through both.”She sighed, rolling her head around on her neck, a flash of annoyance in her eyes.“They’re sending in reinforcements.If you’ll excuse me please?”

“ _FRACK! Oliver!”_

The ceiling above them exploded seconds after Felicity’s warning, showering them in tiles and debris.Soldiers dropped on top of them, bullets spraying without care.Barry sped around them, trying to knock them out as he had the previous group.His hand broke on the first punch, the speedster howling as he was hit in the head with a gun.Oliver shot a trick arrow at the assailant, watching the man next to his target catch the arrows and snap it in half before it could detonate.

And then they all just suddenly stopped.

A silence permeated the air, broken only by the soft hums coming from Katu.

The woman stood where they had left her, but her eyes were closed and her head was down.She was quiet but somehow Oliver still heard her.The soft tunes of Every Breath You Take by The Police floating through his head.

Then the guards all suddenly jerked, their necks snapping and rendering them all unconscious.And possibly paralyzed.

Oliver was fairly certain they weren’t dead.

“The hell was that?”Cisco screeched. “Ehmerm.I’m gonna be sick.”

“Steady Cisco.”Oliver warned, watching Katu shake herself out like a dog before poking her head in a cell.

“Yo!We got places to be let’s go.”A little boy stuck his head out, his red hair contrasting harshly with his white hospital gown.

“Mas?”

“We’re gonna grab him on the way out Menos.These fine people are gonna help?Aren’t you Oliver?”She hoisted the child—the kid looked 7 at the most—up on her hip and turned that confident smile back to Oliver.

He had to look down at himself and make sure he was still in his complete Green Arrow garb, complete with mask.“Felicity?”

_“I have absolutely no idea.Her file just says ‘Do Not Use’.Says her abilities are mind based but there are no details.She’s been there almost as long as Kara.”_

Oliver exchanged another glance with Sara, the assassin eyeing Katu with newfound respect and shrugging.

Oliver sighed, grudgingly returning the arrow on his bow to his quiver.“Yes.We’re here to help.”

Katu’s smile widened.“Excellent.”

~*~

Alex had been trained by J’onn J’onzz.Martian Manhunter.She’d trained with Oliver Queen; Kate Kane; Bruce Wayne; Selina Kyle; Clark Kent; Diana Prince and anyone else who’d been willing to show her a thing or two.She’d dedicated the last ten years of her life to preparing for this moment.

But allowing herself to get her ass kicked…

_Sucked_. __

She panted harshly, gulping air greedily as the aftershocks from the cattle prods coursed through her body.On her side now, she forced her eyes open to see Kara across from her, the sounds slightly distorted in her ear drums.She saw the Kryptonian twist her head aggressively, the tendons in her neck straining under Henshaw’s hold.Lillian was saying something; but the words held no meaning, they were just a jumble of sounds—letters, words.

The words that Eliza and Harley Quinn had painstakingly gone over to ensure that Kara wouldn’t be brainwashed again; that she would have a chance at normalcy.Harley had been especially passionate about helping once Alex had explained the situation.The Sirens had all been on board; the results of their own experiences with people who wanted to control them.There had been no stopping them when the CADMUS files had revealed that Kara had ended the Joker’s life.

The evidence of Harley’s time with him was still clear and Pam had been looking to settle the score for her wife for quite some time.That Kara had done it for her, however much she hadn’t wanted to, had meant that Pam was ready and willing within seconds.And where one Siren went, they all went.

She was pulled from her thoughts when Kara’s entire body seized, muscles pronounced and skin an apple red color.

Then she went limp.

Alex’s hearing and vision cleared, the blurred edges sharpening.The former agent forced her body to its knees.

Fuck that had sucked.

Lex nudged Kara’s still body with the toe of his shoe.“I think you killed it mother.”He squatted down and reached for the necklace, ripping it off with a violent jerk.“At least this is done huh?I’d like to run tests on this; perhaps we can reverse engineer the effects.Test it out on the human—”

His words were cut off.

Not because he was done speaking or had been interrupted.

He hadn’t been.

Not in the traditional sense.

He simply wasn’t _there_ anymore.

In his place was Kara. Except not Kara.The Kryptonian was blurred around the edges, Alex originally thinking that her eyes had lost focus again.Unfortunately, the reality appeared to be that Kara couldn’t maintain a corporeal form.

“Henshaw!”Lillian ordered, trying to appear in control as she turned to leave the room.“Shut her down.I want her in the Kitchen’s in an hour.”

Lillian escaped the room and Henshaw tried to follow orders, but his fist simply went _through_ the alien.He growled in frustration, the heat vision on his robotic eye glowing blue before slamming into the blurry figure.Again, the attack went through Kara but it still made her hiss in pain. Alex leapt to her feet, running at the cyborg full speed and ripping one of the cattle prods from the guards next to her.Leaping into the air, she wrapped her legs around Henshaw’s shoulder and slammed the baton down on his neck.He flung her away effortlessly, continuing his assault.

Apparently though, Kara had had enough.She solidified, her own heat vision bursting forth and eradicating Henshaw’s, her vocal cords sounding her defiance as she bore down on him.

Alex watched in horror as the metal man _melted_ under Kara’s fury.

And then that fury was turned to her.

The guards that had been so sure of themselves before scampered like rodents, falling over each other in a vain attempt at escape.Kara blurred over to both of them and smashed their skulls together before turning her glowing eyes on the last person in the room.

Alex didn’t move in the face of that much rage; barely dared to breathe.

“Kara…” Clark appeared from where Lillian had disappeared, dressed in full Superman garb, hands held out to show he meant no harm.“Kara, you need to calm down.”

Kara snorted like a bull, tossing her head back as she paced in front of them.

“Kara,” Clark tried again, “it’s me Kal-El, I—”

The blonde launched herself at him, pinning him against the wall and landing deafening blow after deafening blow.Kal managed to block exactly one hit before Kara threw a mean uppercut straight into his jaw that rocked his head back and made Alex have to cover her ears.The man of steel was unconscious in _seconds,_ not having anticipated the pure ferocity behind the attacks and Alex was once again the sole focus of those eyes.

She rose to her feet slowly, keeping her palms out and voice even.There was little chance for her to survive this encounter if Kara went after her like she had Superman, but she’d feel stupid if she didn’t at least try.

Alex licked her lips.“So, I guess you’re pretty pissed at me.”

Kara said nothing, just paced in front of her; reminding Alex vividly of a large cat stalking its prey.

“To be fair, I was pretty pissed at you too.I mean, throwing me out of a _window_ —not cool.My ass hurt for _weeks!_ ”

Kara bared her teeth, her incisors looking particularly sharp at the moment, and Alex found herself being held up by her neck, her oxygen supply slowly being cut off.Fear nearly paralyzed her but then she felt the slight tremble in Kara’s hand, and this close she could see the way her lips were twitching.Kara wasn’t angry— _she was scared._

“’s okay.”Alex gasped, pressing her feet against the wall behind her for more leverage.“’s okay Kara.I’m here now.I got you.”Kara’s hand tightened, but a soft whine came from her chest and Alex allowed her grip to lighten where her hands had been clenched on her girl’s arm.Because this was _her_ girl.This was Kara _and_ Linda.The two great loves of her life were one and the same.What a mind fuck.But she couldn’t worry about that right now because the decisions she made in the next few minutes would determine her and Kara’s entire future.Kara had given up _everything_ for Alex when she was just 16 years old.It was all on Alex now. “’s okay.I love you.You’re okay honey.You’re safe now.I’ve got you.I got you.I love you so—"

She couldn’t say anymore, her airway completely cut off and she felt herself start to lose consciousness.

Alex came to when her body fell to the floor, rolling out of the way as Kara _lost her shit._

The Kryptonian was clearly no longer in control of her body or her powers, her head swirling around and releasing her heat vision around the room.Alex rolled over to Superman and pulled him to her chest as she tried to find an exit.This had _not_ been in her plan.Kara taking out the strongest man on the planet?Completely out of Alex’s realm of logic.And everything had been going so well.

Lillian had taken the bait.

Alex had heard J’onn in her head, telling her that he had control of the eldest Luthor.

The activation sequence should have worked in _deprogramming_ Kara, not turning her into a soulless monster.The Kryptonian lashed out, her fists taking out huge chunks of wall, the Lex Luthor imprint being destroyed as she blasted the wall with her freeze breath.

With nothing left to destroy, Kara turned those tortured eyes back to Alex.The red head scrambled as far back as she could, her body defiant even in its last moments.Alex reached into her pocket, to the last resort she had promised Felicity she would use if Kara was too far gone.

The ball hummed under her fingertips; she squeezed once and then let her hand fall to the floor.She’d failed Kara once, she wouldn’t fail her again.She would _not_ be the reason for her pain; nor her death.

“You know me.”Alex insisted, Kara panting in front of her.“Remember Midvale?I taught you how to play hide and seek.I’m like 90% certain you cheated that first time, but it was fine because then you kissed me.You _kissed_ me Kara.”

Kara snorted, the gust of breath that escaped her nostrils slamming Alex back into the wall.

“What about movie nights? Huh?”Alex felt like the wind was crushing her chest, but she pushed on.This was her last chance; her only chance.She wasn’t going to give it up because she was uncomfortable.“You remember Harry Potter?And Star Wars?Lazy Sundays? And my mom? And Winn and Lena and Maggie?You have a life Kara.You have a _home_!”

Kara shrieked, and Alex found herself flying across the room.She blinked, her vision going in and out as her head protested any movements.

“I love you.”She muttered.“No matter what happens, never doubt that I love you.”

Kara blurred and was upon in her in an instant, her hand wrapped around Alex’s windpipe once again.She didn’t squeeze this time, though her fingers were clenched.It was almost like she was waiting for something; her body once more barely there as she existed between speeds.One wrong move and her hands would phase _into_ Alex’s body and if they solidified…

Alex licked her lips, tasting metal as she looked up at the woman she loved.As far as deaths went… well this one was still pretty shitty.

She’d really hoped she could save her.She’d dedicated her entire _life_ to saving this woman…

It still hadn’t been enough.

The Kryptonian exhaled, her breath ghosting out of her nostrils in an icy white fog making Alex shiver.Kara’s other hand came down on the side of Alex’s head, her body kneeling over the human’s in an obvious show of power.

But it was her eyes that made Alex ache.

Kara looked inconsolable.

“Alex…”The words came from somewhere deep, as if it had taken all of Kara’s strength to whisper them.“Please… Kill me.”

No.

It would be easy to do.Alex could remove the ball from her pocket, release it into Kara’s hollow form and move her hand before she solidified.No one would survive that kind of blast.Not even a Kryptonian.

And the torment in Kara’s eyes…

The amount of pain and despair that Kara must be feeling—that she had already gone through—was immeasurable.Alex wasn’t fool enough to believe that a few simple declarations of love from her would remove that.Kara was in agony; her feelings of despair insurmountable.Alex couldn’t fix that.Only years of treatment with a trained mental health professional would be able to help Kara overcome her demons, if such a thing could be done.

Her current breakdown had been well earned.

The answer still resounded through her head—no—but her mouth wouldn’t move, her throat clogged up with emotions.Because— _no_.Kara was hers.This wasn’t how they were supposed to be; not how they were supposed to end up.

Decision made, Alex shook her head, her lips firming into a smooth line as she declared her stance.The corners of Kara’s lips turned down, her teeth clenching as her arm vibrated; fingers spasming around Alex’s neck.

And then Kara froze, her body straight as an arrow, eyes dimming and rolling around in her head before she collapsed boneless on top of Alex.

Alex blinked.

Relief and confusion warring inside of her.

That had been anti-climactic.

“Hello,” she jerked her head around, a short stocky black woman smiled at her.A ball of orange fluff on her shoulder.“I’m Katu and this is Streaks.We’re gonna overthrow these Sons of Bitches.Wanna help?”

~*~

Sirens wailed overhead, someone having finally started to use their brain and sounding the alarm.Lillian Luthor had invested _millions_ of dollars into this facility and to see the level of incompetence…

Everyone here was getting fired.

Everyone.

_Especially_ her good for nothing security team.

Lillian tried to walk as dignified as possible over the wall debris and destroyed furniture trying to reach her son.She realized that it may have still looked very poorly put together but if she was nothing else, she was a mother first.

And Lex, her darling boy, had just been thrown through _several_ walls by that _beast._

She was also going to kill that creature the first chance she got.Take it apart limb from limb.

Lillian had been humane in the past, working on the alien only when she was unconscious of numbed.Not this time.

This time the bitch was going to scream.

Lex was unconscious when she reached him, but alive.The suit he was wearing having been designed to absorb and displace any kinetic energy that touched him.It was a fine piece of technology and Lillian never stopped praising her son’s beautiful mind.

The Kryptonian plague would end by Lex’s hand and the world— _humanity—_ would finally see what he had been trying to show them for years.Once ALFA enacted their plans, the human race would be on their knees begging the Luthor’s to save them.

Lillian planned on making them grovel; they deserved it after all they had put her family through.She walked to the nearest computer, typing in a few commands that would release a sleeping agent into the ventilation system.In the control room she had just left she released a form of Kryptonite gas.

It wouldn’t kill that disgusting thing but it would knock her out and allow Lillian to get her revenge.

Allow Lex to finalize his plans.The Brainiac was a formidable opponent and in order to defeat him at the end of all of this, they would need to design a weapon of greater strength.K-2S0 would do perfectly; her genetic makeup would be more than enough to finish the last phase of their project.Their very own Superman.

Not the hack job that she had unintentionally done on Henshaw when she was just starting out and not even the grooming that she planned on employing with K-3S9.

No, this would be a completely different weapon, one designed specifically to follow the commands of the Luthor’s with all of the powers of a Kryptonian at its disposal.Being built on AI, it could always however be corrupted and she doubted it would be a perfect model when they needed it against ALFA but it would get the job done.

One of the reasons she had so wanted Alex Danvers on her team was to design the kill switch that would allow them to stop the android without losing their investment.That bitch had betrayed her handily and Lillian would enjoy taking away everything the agent loved.

One by one.

The matriarch of the Luthor family typed out a few final commands, sending the facility into lockdown before turning back to her son.

She startled at the brunette woman standing behind her, the woman’s arms held almost lazily behind her back.

“Who are you?”Lillian demanded, hand already pulling one of the guns she had secreted away under the console desks.

The woman rolled her shoulders, taking a step forward but stopping when Lillian raised the gun.“My name is Astra.I am looking for my niece, perhaps you can help?”

Lillian frowned, her disapproval probably clear on her face.“We are in lockdown and your concern is for your niece?Family bonds are admirable but in times of emergency I find I have little patience for them.Go to your department head and get your corridor under control.”

Astra nodded, taking half a step back as she asked, “my department head is Jeremiah Danvers, would you happen to know where I can find him Miss…”

“Luthor.”Lillian snapped, feeling annoyance creep into her voice.“And I have no idea where Dr. Danvers is.If he knows what’s good for him then he’s back with Henshaw containing that damn Kryptonian.”

“Ah,” Astra said, planting her feet and dropping her hands to her sides.“Well, that changes things Mrs. Luthor.”

Fully annoyed now, Lillian jerked her gun hand at her son’s still body.“Never mind, you’re obviously new and I won’t have you messing up my plans on your first day.You will help me get my son to the safe room down the hall.”

Saying that, Lillian stooped, gun still in hand as she moved Lex into a sitting position.

Still standing over her, Astra watched her dispassionately.“I won’t do that Mrs. Luthor.You and your son are going to die down here.Jeremiah Danvers will follow you shortly, and anyone else who dared lay a hand on my niece.”

“Your niece—” Lillian jerked the gun up, her finger already squeezing the trigger but a flash of black metal came from behind her and sliced the appendage off, her wrist a bloody stump after the swift movement.She was actually shocked to find that for at least the first 30 or so seconds she couldn’t even feel the pain.

When it set in, she couldn’t control her scream of agony.

“Niece.” Astra confirmed, lifting Lex and slapping him across the face.“Her name is Kara Zor-El and you took a great deal from her.”Lex’s eyes blinked open, his honed reflexes allowing him to grab a pen dart and shove it at his attacker.Astra batted the weapon away as if he was a toddler throwing punches.“Allow me to return the favor.”

Lillian yelled her negation; halfway to her feet as Astra’s eyes glowed a solid blue and she sent a concentrated beam of light into Lex’s chest.

The action was unlike anything Lillian had ever seen before and had it been anyone else, had any other person been at stake, she was sure she would be amazed at the complete control Astra showed.The Kryptonian’s heat vision moved slow enough that Lillian was able to see it move towards Lex’s chest, the speed deaccelerated so much that Lex didn’t die or even pass out at the first contact.

Instead, he screamed; he threw punches and thrashed and kicked.His blows had no effect on the woman holding him up, his legs lashing out in brutal blows that would have incapacitated anyone else.

His face purpling, Lex moved his head enough to shout, voice rising over Lillian’s own.“Enchantress!”Her son’s hand dug into his pocket and whatever he had in there made Astra flinch enough that her grip loosened, and Lex crashed to the floor, his chest a smoking mess.“Enchantress!Get me out of here!”

A swirl of dark mist appeared from seemingly nowhere, consuming Lex and vanishing with him in a matter of seconds.

And just like that Lillian was left alone; abandoned by her own blood.

Astra cursed in another language, her face set in rage at being so duped and hands rubbing roughly at her ears.

Lillian watched in silence, a betrayal soul deep setting into her bones and making her more exhausted than she could ever remember being.Her sorrow was barely a minute old before she was being turned to face the other woman.This one was younger than Astra, her brown hair cut closely to her scalp on the sides and a shorter bob allowing a fringe to hang in front of her eyes.Her eyes were a bright vivid green and the sword she pressed to Lillian’s neck gleamed brighter than any silver she’d ever seen on earth.

“My name is Kitai Zor-El and this is my mother Astra In-Ze… you took my little sister’s arm…”

The woman waited for a response and when Lillian refused, her mouth set in a firm line as she fought to retain her composure, Kitai’s arm flexed.

Lillian didn’t even realize her arm was gone until she looked to see where the blood spatter had come from.

She screamed in horror and pain, her mouth wide open in terror as Astra rounded her, pulled her up by her hair and pressed her gun into her remaining hand.

“Defend yourself human.You have too many sins to atone for and we are very eager to help you in that endeavor.”

Lillian found herself being pushed back, snot and tears making a mess of her face as she struggled to raise the gun to their level.She pulled the trigger; the bullets specialized to work against 13 species of alien, Kryptonians being one of them.Kitai stepped in front of her mother easily, the blade in her hand a blur as she _cut_ the bullets from the air.The final swish of her blade she directed at Lillian, shock leaving the matriarch of the Luthor family vulnerable.She felt the bullet that had been redirected towards her, the projectile piercing her throat and causing blood to enter her airway.

She fell to her knees, too weak to even try to hold her throat together as she stared up at the mother daughter duo and wondered how her day had gone so badly.

“You took my sister’s choice, forced her into a life of servitude and silence;” Kitai was saying, Astra lifting Lillian up to her face by her collar. “Now you do not even get the honor of any last words.”

The last thing Lillian saw was the glow of two eyes bearing down on her own with heat vision, Astra’s hands clenched tight in her shirt.

~*~

After Alex was surprised by Katu and her weird ass kitten, J’onn had finally made his appearance; Vasquez at his side, armed with an assault rifle and looking Alex up and down with something like disappointment.

“Dude you let them mess your face up really good.”

Alex scowled, head pounding as she gently moving Kara’s still body off of her and feeling along her neck for her pulse.“Gee _Susan_ I wonder why!”Kara’s heartrate was elevated, whatever they had done to her obviously having an effect on a metabolic level.Alex needed to get her to Ni immediately.She’d know how to help her.“Mayhaps it’s because the two people who were supposed to have my back were over there playing foosball!You did remember that you were supposed to come in _after_ we deprogrammed her right?Not just Superman?”

J’onn frowned, moving over to Clark and hefting him over his shoulder like a sack of flour.“I don’t even like foosball.They had a vending machine and Agent Vasquez needed a water.”

_That_ made Alex pull her eyes away from Kara’s sunken face, an angry retort on the tip of her tongue when she saw the teasing glint in her mentor’s eyes.

“No one thinks your funny.Vasquez didn’t laugh.”

The other agent shrugged, a smile teasing her mouth.“I did.”She argued, eyes darting around the room to check for other threats.“On the inside.We had to deal with Metallo, he’s like an annoying little fly, isn’t he?Ready to go?”

“Yeah.”Alex agreed, cradling Kara and lifting her over her back in a fireman’s carry.The movement hurt but Kara was so light that Alex barely even felt the weight.She was going to _kill_ Lillian Luthor.And anyone else who’d been involved in this.

Vasquez made sure she was ok before the odd group made their way out of the room.When the corridor split Katu moved to Kara’s head, stroking her cheek and pressing their foreheads together for a moment.

Then she was pulling away, a bright smile on her face as she moved into an easy handstand and hand walked herself in the opposite direction.

“She’d probably get along great with your Gotham friends.”Vasquez commented, leading them down the corridor that would get them to their rendezvous point.Raven was supposed to set up a point for her teleportation; between her and Cisco’s portals, both heroes would be able to evacuate large number of prisoners to their secret refugee camp.

Lena Luthor would be waiting on the other side; Batman, Felicity, team arrow, and Ni waiting with her and making sure none of the aliens were a threat to humanity.

Batman was an asshole, but he was very good at accessing threat levels.Besides if he stepped out of line, Ni had Fiora to back her up in kicking his ass.

They were about 3 rooms over from their destination when their path was blocked.

Normally Alex would have been pissed at the hold up; her concern for Kara would have made her more than angry enough to just plow through her opponent.

As it was, her opponent was her father and she very much had been looking forward to meeting with him.

J’onn and Vasquez looked to her; obviously waiting for her cue.

“Hello Jeremiah.”Adjusting Kara’s body on her shoulders she took a few steps forward allowing about 10 feet to remain between her and the stocky man.

He looked like he had in the sewer; calm and amused.As if Alex had done something particularly clever and he was trying to decide whether to be proud or angry.

“Alex, you can’t possibly be angry enough to fire me from my role as your father.I think I should at least get a yearly review.”

Alex bit her tongue, trying to control her temper as she imagined different ways to flagellate the man in front of her.Logically she knew she wouldn’t actually be able to kill Jeremiah.He was still her dad whether she liked it or not, but she could hang him by his pinky toes.Maybe play darts with him as her pin cushion?

“How’s this for a yearly review?”She asked, “you suck!”

Jeremiah sighed, crossing his arms and tilting his head in disapproval.“What could I possibly have done that was so bad, honey?”

Making a noise of disbelief Alex shook her head, the rant erupting from her mouth without pause.“Um, I don’t know.Maybe the fact that you killed all those people in the sewer?Maybe the fact that you very nearly succeeded in _murdering_ my best friend?Or how about the fact that you _sold_ Kara—the girl you were supposed to _protect_ —to the highest bidder?”

Jeremiah quirked his eyebrows at her, “you think I sold Kara?”

The rage she had been feeling diminished slightly, the genuine disbelief in Jeremiah’s face throwing her for a loop.She shifted her feet, sharing a quick glance with J’onn and watching the brief shake of his head.

Whatever Jeremiah was thinking J’onn couldn’t read him.

“Didn’t you?I mean it’s kind of ironic that you go missing and then—”

“Is that what they told you?”Jeremiah interrupted, waving his hand to cut her off.“That I went ‘missing’?”

Alex shifted again.“You did.I know you were working for the DEO back when the real Hank Henshaw was in charge and he sent you on a mission to intercept an alien—J’onn.But you protected him, traded your life for his and then you disappeared.Presumed dead.”

“Interesting story.Not completely factual but it will do in a pinch.”Jeremiah conceded with a shrug.“I still don’t understand, if this all happened, when I would have had the time to ‘sell’ Kara.”

“No one else knew she was there.You were the only one who knew.Then you decide that working for a secret government agency is a good idea and our lives go to hell.”

Jeremiah’s gaze turned flat, his expression unimpressed as he shifted his eyes to J’onn.“I asked you to protect my daughter not lie to her.”

“If you wanted her to hear your truth than you should have been there to tell it.”J’onn argued.“I told her what I knew and what was recorded at the DEO, we pieced together what we could from that.”

Jeremiah hummed, once again looking at Alex, expression softening.“I didn’t sell Kara, honey.I would have never done that.I loved her a great deal.I love you both.Revealing her would have only put you and your mother at risk.”

Alex bit her lip, uneasy with this revelation.“But—”

“Alex,” Jeremiah warned patiently, “I did not ‘decide’ to work for a government agency, it was forced upon me.I was trying to protect you.Word had spread that an alien craft had landed in Midvale and they were getting closer to Kara.I signed on to try to throw them off her scent; lead them away from our family.Your mother knew this; why she wouldn’t tell you that is beyond me.I was only trying to keep Kara from harm; she was still just a child.She didn’t deserve what happened to her.I did everything I could to prevent it.”

Kara’s breath ghosted against Alex’s neck, the breathing pattern remaining steady but elevated.Kara’s heart and lungs were probably being strained with the trauma she had experienced, and she needed a doctor _now._ Alex didn’t have time for this.She didn’t have _time._

“Jeremiah… _Dad…_ I need to go.Will you let us pass?”

It was a test.If he said…

“No.”

Alex’s heart plummeted, the brief stab of hope disappearing as Jeremiah dropped his arms to his side.

“If you loved me—”

“Don’t make this about love honey.This is about more than that.The aliens have taken over our planet; our way of life!They’re threatening our very existence.”Jeremiah shook his head.“Something has to be done.Something needs to change.”

Alex nodded, throat tight and eyes stinging as her ire grew.“Tell me again that you weren’t responsible for what happened to Kara.”

“I wasn’t.Her uncle was.”

Appropriately caught off guard, Alex could do nothing but blink, her heart thudding in her chest.“What?”

Jeremiah shrugged, pulling a gun from the holster at his thigh.“Her uncle Non grew tired of waiting for his chance to usurp the human race.Astra—you’ve met Astra, right? —well Non believed Astra was too distracted by her love for Kara to do what needed to be done… So, he decided to remove the distraction.He contacted CADMUS.He told them where she was.He led them right to her.”

Alex felt sick, her stomach turning at the _wrongness_ of it all.

Jeremiah smiled kindly at her.“Unfortunately, our time to chat is up.Non is more prone to impatience since his trip to the Kitchen.”

The Kryptonian that had attacked Catco stepped out from the corridor behind Jeremiah like a fucking douche.Honestly, why did the bad guys always wait for a big reveal.Why not just hang out next to her dad?Why lurk in the hallway listening in like a fucking n00b?

Jackass…

And how the hell had he gotten out of the fucking DEO anyway?!

Alex glared at J’onn but the Martian had turned his full attention to the enraged Kryptonian facing off against them.

Non huffed, legs braced beneath him as if he were about to take off.

“What did you do to him?”Alex asked, because from what she remembered of Non, he would _never_ follow the orders of a human.Not that it mattered who he followed, now that she knew that _everything_ was because of him—there was simply no hope for the man.She was going to end him.

“Lobotomy.”Jeremiah said, glancing up at the slightly taller alien.“They’re much more cooperative like that.Kara was next in line for the procedure… although her organs were to be harvested.I think a part of me is glad you’re taking her away from here.”

“You’re sick dad.”

“Alex,” Jeremiah said calmly, “I’m going to need you and your team to stand down now.”

J’onn shrugged Clark off his shoulder, laying the Kryptonian on the floor beside him.“Alex, get her out of here.”

In the next few moments several things happened; Non charged and J’onn intercepted him, their bodies slamming together like a thunderclap.

Vasquez fired 2 shots at Jeremiah, hitting him solidly in the chest as he fired at her head.

Alex kicked Vasquez’ knee out, the drop in her height making her miss her own headshot but ultimately saving her life.

Jeremiah frowned down at his chest, and Alex was certain that she had just helped kill her father.

But there was no blood.

Jeremiah eyes rolled into his head and he fell… but there was no blood.

Next to her, Vasquez resumed her feet, adjusting her gun strap on her shoulder as she walked over to Jeremiah and casually ducked under the fighting aliens.

“Thanks.”The other agent said, stooping down and putting two metal sleeves on Jeremiah’s arms that snapped together when engaged.Vasquez nodded at Alex, a nonchalant smile on her face as J’onn threw Non through the ceiling.“Ready to go?”

Disbelief holding her a momentary prisoner, Alex quickly shook herself to gather her wits.There’d be time to settle her head later.Right now, she had to get Kara to safety.

But first…

She was going to blow this place to hell, so it could never be rebuilt.

Vasquez frowned at Clark, considering him and the transport options she had for him and Jeremiah.

“ _Hey darling,”_ Felicity’s voice said in her ear, making Alex jump at the abruptness.“ _I saw you might need a lift.”_

A jiggling door handle rattled next to them and Ray Palmer walked in in his Atom suit alongside Heatwave and Captain Cold.

“Hello.”Ray said with a cheerful wave as he stooped to pick up Jeremiah.

Captain Cold and Heatwave were less enthusiastic, nudging Clark with the toe of their boots and exchanging disgusted looks.

“Can’t we just wake it up?”

_“You can **pick** it up.”_Sara Lance said, obviously in the middle of a fight.“ _Don’t make me change the code to the fridge!”_

Mick scowled, bending to pick up Superman’s limp body.“I don’t know why you like her so much.”He accused.

Snart smirked, his gun laying across his shoulder as he brought up the rear.“I don’t either.That’s the fun of it!”

“Here,” Alex said, quickly transferring Kara to Vasquez.“Get her to base.Ni should be able to help her.”

Vasquez eyed her, eyed the ongoing fight between Non and J’onn, and let out a long-suffering sigh.“Just don’t get dead.”

Alex shrugged and pressed a hard kiss to Kara’s forehead.“Thanks, Vaz.”

She took off in the other direction, dodging Non’s body as he was thrown through a wall.J’onn followed after him, delivering powerful blows to the Kryptonian’s torso.Unfortunately, Non blocked them all, moving with all the efficiency of one in the Kryptonian Military guild.

Non slapped down the next punch that J’onn threw, his hand wrapping around his opponent’s wrist and pulling him sharply toward him at the same time he brought up his knee.The Martian let out a loud ‘oomph’ and collapsed over himself, both of Non’s clenched hands slamming into the back of his head.

He went down like a rock, and Non’s eyes blazed red as he prepared to deliver the final blow.

Alex launched a prototype bomb that she had made during her downtime at CADMUS, the small ball exploding on impact and coating Non’s arm and torso in a thick, pink, viscous fluid.She had her ‘last resort’ in her hand and hurled at Non before she knew what she had done.The Kryptonian, seeing her attack now that he had been hit by an unknown substance, turned his heat vision on her and inadvertently ignited the bomb Alex had thrown seconds before it hit him causing an explosion mere centimeters from his face.

Non howled, thrashing as the fluid he had been doused in was set alight and Alex ran full tilt at J’onn throwing herself between him and the flailing Kryptonian flame ball.Her mentor remained on the floor, crouched on hands and knees as he shook the cobwebs out of his head.He was vulnerable and Alex wouldn’t let any harm come to him.

She raised her gun, thumbing over the tech Winn had created until a Kryptonite bullet sat in the chamber.Her finger remained poised on the trigger as Non got closer.He was moving too much, she needed the perfect shot.

Closer.

Non shifted, obviously realizing that the person behind his current predicament had moved across the room, and charged at her full speed.

In the nanoseconds that followed, Alex pictured the contents of Kara’s file—every cut, every wound, every ounce of pain—it was all because of Non.She wished she could make him experience even half of it.

Alex squeezed.She felt something hit her, heard something crack and then nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok...
> 
> Kara's letter. She laid everything on the line in that one. If that wasn't a great motivator then I don't know what is. Also, I almost wrote out Spike's I love you confession to Buffy in there. I wrote the second line and I was like, dude get a hold of yourself. That speech still makes me swoon.
> 
> Flash forward to present day and Alex is visiting CatCo. 
> 
> Poor Mon-El huh? 
> 
> So Alex needed to be seen so that Lillian would question her loyalties. She needed Lillian to believe she slipped up and that Lillian had been the one to catch her. If Lillian thought that, than everything that followed would be because Lillian was a genius who was not to be fooled by anyone (little did she know). With that said, she needed Lillian to believe all of that because she needed to give Lillian a reason to use her against Kara. This was to ensure that those high levels of pain Felicity mentioned before could be reached for mental manipulation. 
> 
> In Layman's terms, Alex needed them to torture her in front of Kara so that Kara would get angry enough to be programmed. Only, J'onn took control of Lillian's mind and read off words to deprogram her instead. It didn't work perfectly but... halfway maybe?
> 
> Bazing Bazing. Are we all on the same page? I struggled with making that come through accurately so I really hope that clears up any lasting questions. Probably not, but one can hope.
> 
> Anyway, it was a sucky situation but with the time constraints they had, there was very little options here.
> 
> Then, the Sirens.
> 
> Yay! Harley Quinn post Joker is one of my favorite characters of all time! I love her so much. And her and Pam are official in the DCU :). le sigh. Anyway. the YRP reference was from the Final Fantasy game franchise. 10-2 to be exact. Plus, them fighting to the cha cha slide just made me laugh hysterically.
> 
> What'd you guys think of Kalasin? If you've ever read/seen X-Men, there's a mutant named Spike, whose body produces... spikes. Original I know. Also, I might have a slight obsession with Spikes.
> 
> Moving on.
> 
> For those of you who mentioned it by the way, Raven teleported everyone in except for J'onn and Vasquez. They phased through the walls. No one dressed up as a guard. Felicity and Winn hacked the systems and shut down motion sensors at specific access points for them to get through and bam. Everyone was in.
> 
> Per Kara: Do you guys remember when Barry came back all fucked up and was just speeding around the room mumbling nonsense. Well Kara isn't mumbling nonsense but she is speeding around the room like that. Maybe also think Reverse Flash?
> 
> The alien that Oliver saw was Terra. Looks like the Titans found their missing member. Except she'll one day be responsible for their demise...
> 
> Anywho, Katu's powers are revealed. There were snippets here and there but essentially she can project herself into your mind/being. Think Raven's telepathy mixed with Blood Bending from Avatar. That's Katu.
> 
> STREAKY! No idea what my plans are for the fuzzball but a nice cameo all the same.
> 
> Kitai and Astra killed Lillian. Not sure what else to say there. They kind of chopped her up and burned her alive... Hope that wasn't too violent... I did ask you guys... multiple times so... yeah...
> 
> Then Jeremiah and Non!
> 
> And you all thought Jeremiah was evil. Here's the thing, I really like Jeremiah I don't think he's a bad guy. I think CADMUS fucked his shit all up. If you can see he contradicts himself a lot; saying he loves Kara but then saying the alien menace needs to be eradicated. Those are CADMUS' words not his. He's brainwashed and the small piece of him that's left is doing all it can to protect his girls.
> 
> He's a psychotic bad guy for sure, but he didn't hurt Kara.
> 
> Non did.
> 
> How did no one question that?
> 
> In the series he pretty much tried to assassinate her. No one thought, hey what was that guy up to when she got took? lol. Now *he* is a sick bastard.
> 
> Side note: In the comics, he was actually lobotomized. Or something similar. I forget but I remember thinking of him as Ferdinand. Child me was very forgiving so he might have been a homicidal Ferdinand but who's judging?
> 
> Let me know your thoughts guys! As we come nearer to the end, I feel relief and sadness so I need to get all of your comments in now, before they're gone forever lol.
> 
> Seriously though, thank you all for staying on this wild ride with me. The comments, the kudos, the bookmarks, heck even the hits: they all serve to boost my confidence and help me get through my days and weeks. You guys are awesome!
> 
> Friendly reminder not to annoy anyone your coworkers when they're just trying to be antisocial and happy.  
> ~Chronicles


	21. Hold On (I still want you)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ok, so here's the thing... I may have gone slightly overboard with the finale... The next chapter is 20k words and, while I know you guys will be all like "that's nothin" I feel like it's a lot. Especially given that it's a battle. Currently things will remain as is, but I'm kind of flirting with the idea of posting half next week and the second half the following week to give you time to digest. Flirting. Not saying it's gonna happen but... we'll see. Let me know what you guys think of the idea.
> 
>  
> 
> Anywho, moving on. My kitten has learned to hunt and he's been hunting me since I'm the only one around. There was an... incident that I just have to share... so the thing is, he sprung from the table as I was walking by and like I didn't really see him but he timed it all wrong and so I wasn't even near him and he kind of just sailed past me into the tv... I am ashamed to say I laughed my ass off. He has failed multiple times since and I really want to enroll him in hunting school because he is not good at it. Does such a thing exist?
> 
> yours truly,
> 
> Chronicles
> 
> Song: Hold On- Chord Overstreet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we're back.
> 
> So last week we saw what I lovingly titled, "Let the Bodies hit the Floor." Since then that song has not left my brain and I find myself randomly growling 'floor' at people.
> 
> Anyway, last week Alex finally got her shit together. She reached out and made a plan, partnered with Lena and Lucy so that after her plan, there was aid for those she was helping.
> 
> If you remember all the way back in chapter 1, Alex forgot that little tidbit when she was helping Serilda. Poo on her.
> 
> But anyway, now that she is adulting she got help.
> 
> Cue The Plan: Name Pending. Alex was 'caught' by Lillian in her subterfuge and roughed up in frpnt of Kara. All so that Lillian could get the necklace off and strip her for parts. Well she got the necklace off but the parts part... that got a little complicated when Kara went Bride of Chucky on them.
> 
> Lillian left, leavng Alex to clean up her mess and ran into Astra and Kitai. Cue death by dismemberment.
> 
> Meanwhile, Kate and the Sirens were busy breaking out our little hunk of bunny love, Kalasin. There were some injuries but no worries, Kalasin didn't let anyone get too hurt.
> 
> Then back at CADMUS, Kara was busy taking out the man of steel himself before turning her ire on Alex.
> 
> Katu stepped in at the last moment and our hero continued on her quest to save the extremely strong and slightly crazed maiden.
> 
> But Jeremiah was in the way.
> 
> After a very long, emotional segment, Alex learned that her father was indeed NOT behind Kara's capture as previously believed. No, that honor went to her Uncle Non, who had given CADMUS her wherabouts so that he could convince Astra to move forward with Medusa.
> 
> Obviously that didn't happen but... whatever.
> 
> Alex calmly handed Kara off to Vasquez and she and J'onn entered a battle royale with Non.
> 
> We pick up after Alex hears a crack and fades to black.

** Hold On (I still want you) **

 

Alex frowned down at the board in front of her before confidently moving her rook to take her opponents knight.Kalasin gave her a close-lipped grin in two quick moves had Alex in checkmate.The agent scowled and Jon, sitting next to her, laughed in her face, offering his hand out to Kalasin in a congratulatory high five.

The toddler tilted her head in confusion, her smile wavering slightly but she raised her hand as well holding it there unsure of her next steps.Jon smiled and gently tapped their hands together.

“Your mom cheated in the first game we played too, you know?”Alex complained, moving to clean up the pieces of their chess game.“She smiled just like you are now.Super rude.”

“You’re just a sore loser.”Jon teased, standing from his position on the floor and walking to the cabinet of board games.“Dad says that’s why he doesn’t play games with you.”

Alex closed the box in her lap, snorting at Jon’s accusation and glaring up at him.“Your dad sucks at all games.That’s why he doesn’t play; cause I’d destroy him.”

She had intended to say more, knowing Clark was listening in from the other end of the room, but Kalasin chose that moment to clamber over the small chest Alex had set up for the game and burrow herself into Alex’s arms.The stuffed bear that Harley had given her clutched to her chest as she snuggled the older woman.It took everything in Alex not to melt into a puddle of goo.

Kalasin reminded her of Kara in so many ways which was more than enough to make Alex love her.But the implicit trust that the girl had bestowed upon her, the seeming desire to be near Alex at all times, that offered its own sense of belonging that Alex wasn’t sure she’d felt for anyone outside of Jon.And never this strongly.

She wrapped her arms around Kalasin in turn, running her nose over the baby soft bristles on her head and allowing her mind to wonder for a moment.

The trip back to the base Lena had set up was fairly simple; and not nearly as theatric as Alex had imagined it in her head.After Mick and Snart had shown up, the group had easily met up with Raven and walked through the portal.Apparently, they had been one of the last groups to leave the facility and once Barry had sped through the rest of the building they had deemed it safe to go back for Alex and J’onn.

As she understood it, J’onn had carried her back before a real search party could be mounted and had radioed that he would bring her back himself.

Alex found herself to be very glad she didn’t remember the phasing through walls thing.That would have turned her stomach.

Felicity and Winn had stepped up to the plate then, the fobs that Astra and her daughter Kitai had left around the facility giving them central access to all of CADMUS’ systems.

They’d downloaded everything.

Every crime CADMUS had ever committed.

Every experiment.

All the videos of tests and torture.

All of their backers.

Every government official who had known about them and allowed it to continue.

And their plot to work with ALFA and disseminate fear and distrust against aliens and metas.

Then they’d broadcast it online.

The president was going to have a lot of explaining to do.

Felicity had been worried for Lena; the woman not deserving to be punished for her family’s crimes.

The youngest Luthor had simply said that she’d rather be persecuted than allow her family to continue to hurt people.

She’d been the one to press the button; the one that made everything public.

Alex had barely been paying any attention at all at that point.Her focus had been on Kara.

She’d woken up in a cot, her mother’s hands skirting nervously near her head as she checked the damage to Alex’s skull.When she’d deemed her brain suitable for use, she’d moved on to Alex’s other injuries and Alex had had time to take in her surroundings.Most notably Kara’s pale form in the bed next to her.

Kara’s chest was barely moving, her breath leaving her in a high whistle as her lips started to turn blue.

“What the hell did they do to her?”Katu.That had been Katu.

Pam had come from seemingly nowhere, her plants poking at Kara as Ni took up residence on the opposite side and started moving her hands over the Kryptonian’s body.The medical team spoke in soft hushes, all of their expressions tight and focused as they worked on their patient.

Alex felt warm hands at her temple, a sort of liquid warmth rushing through her ears.When she looked up she saw Raven, eyes closed, mouthing something above her head.It felt like her brain had peed itself.

An oxygen mask was fit over Kara’s face; her body hooked up to various machines that showed different outputs, the sounds of a too fast heartbeat filling the air around them.

Anxiety was a natural reaction to the atmosphere the tension had created, but Alex would not succumb to it.Not this time.She’d spent most of her life trying to save this woman, and she’d be damned if she’d done all of that just for Kara to die.

She couldn’t die.

“Kryptonite.”Alex’s head spun, her brain rolling uncomfortably against her skull, mouth dropping open as she saw how sickly Jon looked clutched to his mother’s side.“It’s Kryptonite.”He repeated.“I can feel it from over here.”

Pam frowned, shaking her head.“I can pump her stomach but… if it’s already set in…”

Alex clenched her fists, Raven trying to hold her head steady despite all of the movement, but Alex still turned and looked at Ni, eyes pleading.The Krishar looked angry and she made several high-pitched whistles that Alex couldn’t understand.She should have put more effort in like Kara had told her; learned more languages.Fuck!

“I don’t understand you.”Her voice came out in a rasp, and she pushed herself to a sitting position despite Raven and Eliza’s hands trying to keep her lateral.“Ni, I don’t—fuck, please.There has to be something you can do—”

“She said she needs to absorb it.Something about a bone?Maybe a skeleton?Spinal tap!”

“ _You_ need to lie back down.I’ve gotten through the worst of your brain bleed, but your head is still a mess.”Raven said at the same time, impatient and glowering as usual.Underneath that, Alex could see how tired the teen was, she’d been holding portals open all day, that had to be exhausting.

But Alex was already shaking her head, stopping when she felt a distinct swishy feeling, and pushing down the ‘aha’ finger Katu had thrown at her.“No.She’s talking about Bones, she’s an alien that absorbs toxins.”She swatted Raven’s hands away.“I’m fine.Stop exhausting yourself.Help anyone critical or go to sleep.”

“Ah.”Katu nodded, her arms dropping as she listened to more of Ni’s squeaks.“That would explain why she said she couldn’t find the ‘bone’.I thought that was odd.”

Alex grabbed Raven’s heavy cloak, an idea coming to her slowly.“Would your—“

“No.”Raven interrupted.“I already tried.She’s… blocked.”

Fuck this.

Alex staggered to her feet, hand grabbing her mother’s shoulder when the world tilted dangerously.Once she had regained her bearings she stormed across the medical section, pushing through crowds of aliens as Eliza called after her.Her mother would give up and help someone else eventually.Raven had fixed the worst of it and Eliza had already determined Alex’s wounds weren’t life threatening otherwise Alex would have been strapped down and tranquilized.

She found Artax hovering over a small child, his body bobbing gently as he spoke to her.

Alex didn’t have time to politely interrupt.

She grabbed the robot’s shoulder, spinning him around with little propriety.“Kara needs your help.They pumped her full of kryptonite and it’s killing her.You need to help her.”

Artax looked about as scandalized as a robot _could_ look.

The child he had been talking to however, had looked up at Alex with something like awe, her hands already tugging at Alex’s pants.

“Hey, watch it kid.”She took a step back, hands brushing against the surprisingly strong grip.

Artax bristled.“That ‘kid’ is the heir to the Great Scion and you will treat her with respect.”

Alex hopped around the robot, trying to stay out of the grippy hands of the toddler.“What?”

If robots could roll their eyes, Alex was pretty sure Artax would have gotten his stuck with her seeming idiocy.“This is Kalasin El; Kara Zor-El’s daughter.I will assist my Scion, you will assist her offspring.”

“What?No, I can’t—” Her protests were futile, Artax already zooming away towards Kara and Alex was left with a toddler looking up at her with bright blue eyes and a pouty lip.“You have got to be kidding me.”

The small girl, Kalasin, rubbed her eyes with a chubby fist before reaching up to Alex again.She was adorable in the way most toddlers were adorable, and she looked strikingly like Kara, except for her ears which were just a tad too big for her face.

Alex groaned, glancing around the room and seeing Selina Kyle, an ice pack held to her temple, watching her with amusement.She groaned again but finally acquiesced when Kalasin’s lip began to tremble.

“Ok. Ok.”She said, lifting the girl and cradling the child in her arms.“No tears please.I don’t need to add baby torturer to my resume, thank you very much.”

Kalasin yawned in her face, a small bear dangling from her hand as she laid her head on Alex’s shoulder.

“You’re a natural Danvers.”Selina teased.

Alex flipped her off.

It was almost three hours later when Pam found them, slouching down near Harley at Alex’s side.After Harley had finished helping to move the disabled or wounded to their proper places, she’d joined Alex and Selina in their silent vigil; the Sirens seemingly taking it upon themselves to watch over the baby Kryptonian.In the downtime, Harley had also taken it upon herself to bandage both Selina and Alex, cursing them out the entire time for not seeking proper treatment.

When Pam joined them, she looked exhausted but satisfied.

“She’s going to pull through, your girl.”She said, allowing Harley to pull her back into her arms.“That robot injected her with something that’s helping her sweat out the Kryptonite.He said we’ll need to put her in an enclosed space so that the excess doesn’t affect anyone else but… She’ll have a rough go of it for the next few hours, her body’s going to have to fight off the poison but after that… just regular detox.There’s a doctor with her now; a Dr. Natu?They took her to a sterile room to remove the chip in her head.”

Alex had already moved to her knees at that point, Selina’s hand on her shoulder the only thing that stopped her.

“I need to see her—or check on her.I need to make sure she’s ok.”She insisted, her heart thudding with her need to be near Kara.

“You’ve got the kid.”Selina pointed out.“You’ll make her sick to if you take her near her mom.”

“Plus, she’s only going to feel safe with you.”Katu made her entrance, plopping down in front of them in an effortless prayer pose.“There’s a bit of Martian in her, she can mind meld with people around her; see their lives, their feelings.She sees who you were to her mother.In her mind, you’re the next best thing.”

Alex frowned because as much as she loved Kara… she hadn’t signed up for that.That was way too much pressure, way too fast.Of course, she couldn’t say that without looking like a major douche.

“She’ll be fine.”She tried instead, gently prying Kalasin’s arms from around her neck.

The girl came to life in seconds, latching on with all her Kryptonian strength and started to cry.The helpless whimpers drove a stake straight through Alex’s heart.

Katu gave her a clear “I told you so” look and Harley’s glare was outright murderous.

Alex scowled at them both but stopped trying to escape her fate.

“Ok.”She conceded, rocking the toddler in arms and holding her as close as she could.“Ok.I’m sorry.I’m not going anywhere.I’ve gotcha.You’re ok now.You’re safe.”

~*~

They’d had to put Kara back in a cage.Alex had made sure there was plenty of light; _natural_ light.They’d moved her to the top floor and Clark and Astra had cut holes in the ceiling of the warehouse to install impromptu skylights.The glass they had installed for the cell was to prevent the Kryptonite from leaking out; as bad as their situation was, they couldn’t risk separating because their Kryptonian allies were getting ill from second hand poisoning.

When everything had started to die down, Alex had looked for the Luthor’s.One look at Kitai’s face, Kara’s _sister’s_ face _,_ had told her she wouldn’t be finding them here.The only flicker of emotion she had felt about that had gone to Lena.

Alex was now a master in having an evil parent.She still hadn’t wished Jeremiah dead.

She’d _wished_ , she wished him dead.

But the actual wishing him dead part had never really come.

She could imagine the war that would go on in Lena’s mind when she learned the truth.

At the moment, that was the least of her concerns.

At the moment, she was holding a shivering Kalasin to her chest while they watched Kara being moved into her room.

Alex had done her best to fill it with things the other woman had liked.This wasn’t exactly the Hilton, but she’d asked Lois to grab a few things from ‘Linda’s’ old apartment.

Apparently, no one had touched the place since her disappearance.

Alex had a few theories on why it hadn’t just been put back on the market but again: least of her concerns.

Kara was still pale, her skin almost translucent in its coloring.Alex could clearly see the blue of her veins from all the way over here.There was still a faint green tinge to the hue.

And she was thin.

Beyond thin.

She looked like a corpse; her face sunken and hollow.

Alex was too tired to be angry about it.

The child clutched to her chest, had her head tucked under Alex’s neck, her thumb in her mouth.

Alex was too tired to be grossed out by the idea of that digit accidentally (or not so accidentally) touching her.

She just wanted her girl.

She wanted to see her and touch her and hold her.

But there was a kid.

And Alex was many things, but she wasn’t cruel.If the kid wanted her; they kid would have her.

Kara would probably be more pissed if she’d done anything else.

And Alex had screwed up their relationship enough.

Astra came up next to her, the only warning Alex had of her arrival being the slight whisper of air that made her sleeve move.

Kalasin didn’t even react; her eyes still glued on her mother as Pam adjusted the blankets around her chest.

“I wanted to thank you, Brave One.”Astra shifted, her lips pinching at the corners as she kept her gaze dead ahead.“My husband… he dishonored everything my people ever stood for.He betrayed me.I would have loved nothing more than to drop him into the icy hell pits of Mahnloi.In the absence of that option, I am pleased he met his end by your hand.”

“Um, sure.It was my pleasure I guess.”

Astra gave her a nod of deference and they both turned their attention back to the glass cell, lost in their own thoughts for several moments.

“Ten years.”Astra said, her voice as tired as Alex felt.“Ten years and you tell me that these might be the only moments I spend with my niece.”

ALFA.

Another reason Alex was very, very tired.

“We don’t know when they’re going to hit.Just that it will be soon.”

“The clouds?” The clouds, that had apparently started rolling in at around the same time Alex had been imprisoned, were an international phenomenon.The thick gray fluff resembling those that were hurricane like in nature and they’d only been getting thicker and darker, until only pockets of sunlight remained.

“Yes.”Alex confirmed, shifting the toddler in her arms and suddenly very grateful that she hadn’t spent her short prison term wallowing in self-pity.The work out her biceps were currently getting would have been painful indeed.“Lena and Ray went through the data again.Whatever is brewing up there isn’t good.ALFA will strike soon and we’ll all have to be ready.”

Astra rolled her shoulders and when Alex looked at her she realized for the first time that the woman was sad.

“Will she be awake by then?”

“I don’t know.”Alex whispered, hating the thought of Kara waking up in the m _iddle_ of the brewing conflict.“But I’ve made arrangements.Artax says that Kara has a place under water; she calls it Sanctuary. He’s going to take the kids and Lois there as soon as Kalasin is stable.”

“And Kara?”

“He’ll take her too… when she wakes up.”

Astra’s mouth turned down, but she said nothing.They both knew that they couldn’t send Kara with the group unless they knew for sure she was herself.Sending a human and children with a deranged Kryptonian was a recipe for disaster.

No matter how much Alex loved her.

“She’ll be fine.”Alex asserted, shifting Kalasin again.“It’s only been a few hours and she just underwent pretty major surgery.We just need to give her some time.She’ll be fine.”

Astra remained silent.

Kalasin’s stomach did not.

The elder Kryptonian’s lips twitched and she turned to hold out her arms for the child.Like all the times before, Kalasin tensed in Alex’s arms, her hold nearly choking.To save herself from assured death by toddler, Alex rubbed a soothing pattern into the child’s back, humming gently.

Kalasin’s eyes drooped, her body tightened, and then abruptly went slack again.

It was funny that Kalasin was so attached to Alex, when Alex had never really seen herself as the kid type.Sure she’d entertained the idea for a second when she and Kara had been together but before than… and now Kalasin refused to leave her alone.In fact the only other person that the girl had gone to besides Harley was Kitai.And even that had only been for a second.

When Astra had originally shown up with the girl, and introduction had been made, Alex had understood at once why the General had been absent during Kara’s landing years.

Her daughter had been on death’s door and she’d been so desperate to save her that she’d made a deal with Indigo to get them to Earth.Kitai had been who Astra had spoken of all those months ago in front of the NICU.She’d been trying to protect her daughter _and_ her niece.Choosing would have been impossible.

Astra sniffed and let her arms fall to her sides.“She smells her mother on you.”

Alex raised her eyebrows.She hadn’t given anyone permission to _smell_ anything.“While that makes sense, Katu is of the belief that the child has some Martian in her and can ‘see’ my memories.She’s living vicariously through me.”

“That does not seem….”

“Appropriate?”

Astra smirked, hiding the expression immediately and turning to look at Kara again.“Yes.But not in the way you mean human.We Kryptonians are a strong race; not prone to such idiosyncrasies as prudeness.”

“I am not a prude.”Alex bristled, moving one hand to Kalasin’s stomach when it growled again.“I just don’t think a _child_ should be seeing the things I’ve done. _Especially_ with their mother.”

Astra hummed.“Perhaps you should go find her some food?I will keep watch of my niece Brave One.She will come to no harm, I promise.”

The offer was sound, but Alex still shook her head.

“I’ve been trying to get her to eat, she won’t.”

That made Astra turn concerned eyes to her.“Why not?”

“I don’t know.I thought maybe the stuff we have here?I sent Harley and Selina on a run for some more kid friendly snacks.Maybe some fruit.And pot stickers.Kara was addicted to them.”

“Why do you not simply ask her what she likes?”

Alex shrugged.“Tried that too.She won’t say anything.She won’t open her mouth to do anything but suck her thumb.”

Astra frowned and then circled Alex to stand in front of her; her intense gaze landing on Kalasin’s face.Alex knew she was using her x-ray vision to see what was wrong, but it still made her nervous, made her hold Kalasin tighter.

Whatever Astra saw had her reeling back, a slew of Kryptonian curses flying from her mouth.The General was _livid;_ her face a splotchy red as she paced and halted and jerked her body in front of Alex.

It was like she wasn’t sure where to go first.

Who to _kill_ first, if her glowing eyes were any indication.

“Astra.”Alex said, taking a step away from the irate woman as Kalasin tensed again, a distressed noise escaping the small girl.“You need to calm down.”

Astra cursed again, and Kalasin whimpered, the sound pulling Astra from the brink.

Another huff and a few moments of silence, and Astra had regained her composure.Her eyes were still flat and hard, but she was in control now. 

Alex could handle her when she was in control.

She could not handle her next words.

“They cut out her tongue.”

Alex blinked.“What?”

Astra did not repeat herself.

Alex took a slow step back.And then another one, shifting the toddler to her hip as she turned to walk towards the stairs.She took them two at a time as she hurried back down to the pseudo lab she’d asked Lena to set up for her.

Lucy appeared at her side and matched her step.“What’s going on?”

“They teach you sign language, right?In the military?”Alex asked, not pausing in her stride.

“No.”Lucy denied with a frown.“It’s an option to learn, but not required.I do know it though.Why?”

Alex smiled at Kalasin as she set her on the table in front of her, trying to appear as warm as possible.The toddler whined at being detached but allowed herself to be moved, her sharp grumpy blue eyes staying on Alex’s face; thumb still lodged in her mouth.

“Hey sweetheart.”Alex cooed, one hand moving to cup Kalasin’s cheek.“Can you nod if you understand me?Huh?Can you nod?”

Kalasin frowned but nodded, her head tilting slightly in confusion.

“Good.That’s good.”Alex congratulated, fingers playing with the girl’s baby soft bristly hair in the same way Alex knew Kara liked.“I need to give you a check up ok?I just need to look inside your mouth for a bit ok?”Her other hand moved and rested gently on the hand Kalasin had in her mouth, exerting no pressure.“Can you take this out honey?Can you let me see?”

The girl recoiled, shrinking away from Alex and scooting back on the table, her face sporting a look of betrayal.She snatched her thumb from her mouth and snapped it shut, lips pressed thin.

Alex didn’t try to chase her.“I’m not going to hurt you ok?I promise.You trust me, right?”

A look of uncertainty crossed Kalasin’s face and she looked helpless for a moment before she hesitantly raised her hands in front of her and moved them in slow motions.Her hand parallel to her body, she touched her thumb to her chin and moved the appendage towards Alex and back to her body, her face questioning.

Alex made a mental note to learn ASL as soon as possible.

“She wants to know where her mom is.She said she wants her mom.”

Squatting in front of the girl, Alex ignored the pain that flared from her earlier injuries.Allowing yourself to get knocked around _sucked._

“Honey… listen to me for a second ok.Your mom, she got hurt really badly.The doctors—the _good_ doctors _–_ they’re trying to help her.”

Kalasin’s face got angry, and her hand gestures betrayed her ire.

“She says there is no such thing as a good doctor.She says _you_ were supposed to help them.She says you promised.”

Lucy’s words— _Kalasin’s_ words—were like a punch to the gut.

“I know honey.I know.And I’m trying to keep that promise.I swear to you, nothing bad is gonna happen to your mom here ok?We’re going to help her and she’s going to get better.Nothing— _nothing—_ is going to change that.”She waited for the wariness in Kalasin’s eyes to melt away a little, before pushing forward, reaching gently for the girl’s hand.“But in order for me to keep the rest of my promise, I need to help you too.Can you please honey—pretty please—I need to see inside your mouth.”

Slow hand movements had Alex turning to Lucy for another translation, but it took the woman a few moments to get the words out.When she did, Alex understood why.

“She wants you to promise you won’t get angry with her.That you won’t leave.”

Her body tensed, and it took everything in her not to scowl and tighten her hand.Those expressions of anger would frighten the child in front of her.

She’d known enough fear.

“I promise you Kalasin.I won’t get angry and I won’t leave.You’re stuck with me ok?”

A slow curious look, before she slowly opened her mouth.It was clear what was wrong almost as soon as Alex could see past her teeth.Half of the girl’s tongue was gone.Whoever had taken it had at least left enough flesh for her to swallow, but there wasn’t much else.It certainly wasn’t enough for speech.

And it wasn’t enough for eating.

At least not normal foods.

Alex fought the anger and hatred that coursed through her, trying to keep her voice steady and she pressed a long kiss to the girl’s forehead.

“Does that hurt honey?Does your mouth hurt?”Alex knew given the girl’s mastery of ASL, that she probably had been a mute for a while now.This wasn’t new.But she still needed to ask.Needed to make sure.Kalasin’s headshake confirmed her suspicions.They’d done this to her when she was even younger, and the girl didn’t look any older than 5 maybe.So, what, when she was 4? 3? 2?!

Inhaling deeply, Alex pulled back and held both of Kalasin’s hands.“Is this why you won’t eat?”

Kalasin nodded and Alex swallowed.

“Ok.”She acquiesced.“Ok.”

“Lena has a shit ton of yogurt and pudding.I can grab some if you need.”Lucy offered, already heading towards the door.

Kalasin signed something that made her halt, her face melting.“What’s your favorite flavor honey?”

After Kalasin responded, Alex grabbed her hands, motioning for Lucy to wait.Alex had spent enough time with Jon to know that when given the option he’d inevitably choose… “If you eat ice cream, you have to also drink a smoothie.And some water.Deal?”

Kalasin grinned at her, no longer afraid of showing her differences, and nodded.

Alex smiled back, and let the kid hop back into her arms.She settled into the executive chair as Kalasin snuggled back into her.

Staring up at the ceiling while they waited for Lucy to return, she contemplated the way her life had changed.

This was so far beyond anything she had imagined.

She did not expect this—this amazingly fragile corner of _something._ It wasn’t exactly happiness, but it was… something.And, holding Kalasin right now with the promise of Kara waking up soon… she knew without a doubt that she would die to protect it.

~*~

Astra was livid.

It had been over 24 hours since they had returned from CADMUS and, in that time, they’d learned that Kalasin was a Mute, ALFA was gearing to attack, and Kara had woken up.

The last bit should have been a silver lining in their stormy clouds but unfortunately Kara was still irradiated with Kryptonite poisoning.Even Ni had a hard time getting close to her and her kind had exhibited _no_ signs of Kryptonite allergies.

Katu was dealing with it the best of all of them and had disappeared into the dark corners of the warehouse to “call her friends”.Whatever that meant.

The fact remained that Kara was still in quarantine and since Alex had already promised Kalasin she wouldn’t be leaving her… 

It meant that she couldn’t see Kara either.

Astra, Kitai, Clark, and Jon were also banned.

None of them were very happy about it.

“I do not see how you can expect me to simply stay here while my niece grieves.She needs me Brave One.Surely you can see that!”

Alex nodded wearily, pulling a sleeping Kalasin closer to her chest.“I can.”Astra made a noise of annoyance, already moving to leave.“But I know that you can also see that if you go in that room you’re only going to make things worse.Kara doesn’t know who you are Astra.She doesn’t remember you.She’s going to think you’re the enemy and given her current state she’ll panic.You’ll hardly be able to help given that you’ll probably send yourself into a coma what with all the Kryptonite so you’ll both just suffer.Kara might die if we can’t calm her down fast enough.All so you could do what?See her?Comfort her?”

Astra scowled, her expression fierce as she squared off against Alex.Alex glared right back.Astra had no right to treat Alex like this was _her_ fault.She wanted to see Kara just as badly, but she wasn’t going to put her or Kalasin in harms way to satisfy her own selfish needs.Kara had been the subject of someone else’s demands for far too long; it was past time someone put her first.

“Mother.”A brunette stepped up next to Astra, interrupting the silent staring contest between human and Kryptonian and gently placing her hand on Astra’s clenched fist.“Alex is right.Kara needs help, but we cannot assist her right now.Mije is strong, she can last a little longer without us by her side.”

“She shouldn’t have to!”Astra growled, and Alex thought she heard tears in her voice, but the woman was turning her back on the lot of them.

Another interlude of silence pervaded the space as they all silently agreed.

They were in Alex’s lab, her temporary home apparently, and Lena had just told them that Kara was waking up.The CEO stood in the corner of the room away from Astra who had looked at her with disdain.Kitai was obviously the more level headed of the two and had clearly bore the woman no ill will, choosing to stand between her and her mother in a show of support.Lucy solidified the barrier by standing between Lena and Kitai.

On the opposite side of the room was Alex’s family.Eliza had been flown in by Clark yesterday for her medical background, knowledge of all things Kryptonian, and to help decide what to do with Jeremiah.They hadn’t started on the latter project, but the former had been resolved handily by Artax, Ni, Alex, and her mom.Kara’s system was currently being purged of Kryptonite and while the process wasn’t quick, it was safe and solid.

Clark, Felicity, Winn, Ni, and Kate completed the circle, but Alex thought they were more there for moral support than anything else.

“What is your plan Alex?”Kitai finally asked, her armor, that she had refused to take off, gleaming black.It was unlike anything Alex had ever seen before, almost clothlike in nature but as tough as steel when attacked.

“I don’t really have one.We need to send someone in there obviously but preferably someone she knew within the last few months.”

Winn popped up immediately, his hand raising.“I can—”

“Sorry Winn,” Alex cut him off with a head shake.“As much as I would have loved to have you be the one to go in, I also think it’s a bad idea to send anyone she has a strong emotional attachment to.She probably feels abandoned and hurt, she’ll only lash out if she thinks that you were privy to any of it.”

“That doesn’t leave very many options…” Winn muttered with concern.

“I know.That’s why I—”

“I’ll go.”Lucy asserted.“She knows me from CatCo, but not enough that she’d take a betrayal personal if she _does_ remember and I’m combat trained.Probably not enough to take on a Kryptonian at full strength but a Kryptonite filled Kryptonian?I think I can at least poke her in the eye.”

Alex raised one hand to flip her off.“Not funny.”

Lucy smiled and moved towards the door.“I will check on Kara.You lot figure out how to save the world.”

Eliza scurried after her. “I’ll come with you.And you should bring food; she’s probably starving.”

The door closed behind them and Astra’s shoulders trembled.Alex wanted to offer some form of comfort, but she knew anything she said would only serve to insult the proud woman.

Instead she turned the topic to important matters.

“So… All in favor of rescuing all of humanity from mortal peril for no reward say ‘aye’.”

Kitai grinned at her; her smile down right wolfish with excitement.“Aye.”

~*~

“Do you know who I am?”

Kara barely lifted her head, her knees pulled to her chest as she exerted just enough energy to glance at the woman’s features.

“You’re Lucy Lane.”She murmured, head dropping again and nails picking at the thread lines in of her white cotton pants.“You were Cat Grant’s lawyer… and I think you dated James Olsen.”

Lucy snorted, and Kara heard some more shuffling before the woman spoke again.“Unfortunately, I did.Although I saw his eye wander towards you a few times…”

Kara said nothing.She hardly cared who James Olsen had looked at before she’d killed Cat Grant but now… Everything felt heavy; breathing was a monumental task.

She knew she was a Kryptonian and she technically didn’t need to breathe like humans but… she wondered how long she would have to not breathe to finally end it all?To finally escape this cycle of captivity.

It was clear to her now, powers or no powers; CADMUS or no CADMUS, she’d find her way back in a cell one way or another.

…She didn’t want to do it anymore.

“It was a mistake in hindsight.”Lucy was saying, pulling a case closer to her and tapping on the glass separating her from Kara.A small slit opened near the floor and Lucy slid the case through the opening, the glass sealing behind the package.“Dating James,” she allowed.“Maybe not the actual dating part—you learn a lot from a relationship good or bad—but… the whole following him across the country thing?That was pretty insane.I mean when someone shows you who they are believe them right?”

Kara frowned, the other woman’s words confusing her and making her wonder if she was in some sort of alternate reality.She didn’t know Lucy Lane well but from what she remembered the woman was hardly a conversationalist.The one time she’d seemed even vaguely open to chat being the night Alex had almost been killed in her apartment.The whole thing left her more than baffled… and curious. “You followed him across the country?”

Because Lucy Lane also seemed like the epitome of feminism.Much like Cat Grant in owning her femininity and womanhood with a confidence that Kara didn’t even know existed.They’d both been lessons in self-worth.

So, for Lucy to have followed _James_ across the country…

Lucy smiled kindly and nodded at the case before continuing her bizarre topic choice.“I told him I was trans.James.That’s why he left.It was a bit of a… challenge when I finally came out to him and he just… he tried.I can at least say that he tried.To love me for me.Not even my own father did that.”

“I’m sorry.”Kara said, eyes squinting slightly before she once again dropped her head to her knees.She wanted to tell Lucy that she’d find someone better suited for her; someone who didn’t look at other women when he had a girlfriend but… she was too tired.

“I am too,” Lucy returned, her voice going softer, “about Alex.”

Kara tensed but said nothing, her throat closing over her words.Hearing Alex’s name said aloud made everything hurt.She knew that she had attacked the woman; remembered Alex’s distraught face vividly.And she knew without a doubt that Alex was the reason she was in here.She’d taken her from CADMUS only for her to doom her to lock her up here… wherever here was.Still… Kara missed her.Missed her so badly she physically ached.Thinking about Alex was a torture in and of itself; the things she’d done… Alex had every right to hate her.She just wanted…

She inhaled sharply, trying to gain control of her emotions before she completely broke down.

“She’s not staying away to hurt you, you know?She’s not avoiding you Kara…She just needs… we need more time.And considering the last time she saw you, you were trying to kill her…”

“Please stop.”The words came out in a whimper, but they still brought Lucy to a halt; a long stretch of silence invading the cold cell.

Kara let her body tilt to the side, her shoulder crashing to the floor hard enough to make it crack, her back to Lucy.

She hadn’t even felt that.

“I shouldn’t have said that; that was… unkind.Kara… I’m just trying to tell you that I understand how it feels, to feel like a prisoner.To have the one person you love, who you thought loved you back, to have them hurt you… I understand all of it… but Kara, none of that is true for you.”Kara really wished Lucy would just stop talking.Breathing still elevated, she tried emptying her mind.Trying to clear it of all of her bad thoughts so this agony would just stop.“Kara, I can’t convince you of how Alex feels about you.She’ll have to do that on her own, but we need you to know that you are not a prisoner here.We just want to help.”

“People don’t help monsters.”

“ _You_ are not a monster.”

Kara wasn’t sure what had happened during those last moments at CADMUS.She remembered most of it, remembered being kept in the dark for who knows how long.

Remembers intensely how she had held on to the thought of Alex coming for her like some prince charming riding in on a white stead.

When the darkness had overwhelmed her, had sent her mind hurtling back into vast emptiness of space, of the phantom zone…

She remembered trying to focus on the way Alex had held her; the way her fingers had felt on Kara’s face; how safe she’d felt in her arms.

She remembered giving all of that up.

Remembered the exact moment she’d realized Alex wasn’t coming.

That Alex hated her.

That Alex had finally seen what she was and was disgusted by it.

When she’d been let out of the box, half crazed and barely coherent, she’d still tried to protect her.Some part of her, even in her delusions, recognizing that Alex was in pain and she didn’t like it.

She’d fought, and she’d failed.

And she’d almost killed the woman she loved.

If Katu hadn’t been there…

Rage and self-loathing flooded her without warning.Lucy had no idea what she was talking about.She didn’t _know_ Kara _._ She had no idea what she was capable of.

She rolled to her knees, her eyes glowing a fierce blue, metal arm scraping against the floor as she dug her fingers into the cement.

“How about now?Do you see what I am now?”

Lucy gave her a sad look, voice filled with empathy.“I see that you’re in pain and I want to help you, the same way Alex helped me.”

“So this is about Alex?”

“It’s about me being a decent human being.Kara… my dad wanted a son more than anything and when I was born he was overjoyed—”

“—I don’t care!”

“—But when I decided to transition… I lost everything.Everyone.Then I met Alex and… it got a little easier.She loves you… That’s a high commendation in my books.It means you’re worth saving.”

“You don’t know anything about me.”

“That doesn’t mean I can’t help.”

Two precise beams erupted from Kara’s eyes, burning two very perfect holes into the glass in front of her and scorching the ground a mere 2 inches from where Lucy was sitting.

“Get out.”She said quietly. “Now.”

Lucy glanced at the ground, a smirk tugging on her lips.“My nephew is a Kryptonian, he has accidental outbursts all the time.Do you really think you can scare me?”

Kara slammed her fist into the glass barrier, watching with satisfaction as the glass splintered and shattered, raining down on Lucy who threw her hands over her head.

The Kryptonian stepped out of her cell, ducking into a squat so that she could grab the collar of the human’s shirt and haul her to eye level, eyes still glowing blue.

“How about now?”Kara asked, voice misting in front of them with the iciness of her breath.“Are you scared of me now?”

To her credit, Lucy _did_ look more shell shocked and impressed than scared but that hadn’t been what Kara wanted.She needed her gone, she—

“I’m not.”The voice made Kara drop Lucy to her feet—carefully.Eliza Danvers stood in the doorway, but despite her words, she was clearly shaking.“Are you going to lift _me_ in the air like a barbarian?”

“No ma’am.”Kara said, her hands going behind her back as she moved back into her cell, nearly tripping on the case that Lucy had slid to her earlier.“I’m sorry Mrs. Danvers, I didn’t mean—”

“Kara.”Eliza interrupted, her voice soft as she crossed the room.Kara didn’t look up until warm hands framed her face and forced her head up.“Do you know who I am?”

Kara bit her lip, confused.She had just said the woman’s name, why would she think her ignorant of her identity?“I… you’re Alex’s mom.”

They were obviously the wrong words as tears sprang to Eliza’s eyes, but the woman still nodded, her hands holding Kara in place.

“Yes.”She said, words choked. “Yes.”

Kara waited for her to say more but it was clear that she had struggled to say what she had. 

“I’m sorry.”Kara’s eyes dropped to the floor, her hands clenching behind her as Eliza moved one hand to the side of her neck, the other still cradling Kara’s cheek.“I didn’t mean for any of this to happen.”

“I know you didn’t darling.”Eliza’s thumb swiped under her eye and Kara realized she was crying.“Is it…”Eliza paused, her bottom lip catching between her teeth in the same way Alex’s had when she was trying not to be rude.“Is it ok to call you Kara?”

Kara nodded, the move jerky and stiff as she tried to keep the tears in her eyes.

Eliza smiled, fingers still moving over Kara’s skin.“I was very worried about you Kara.When I heard what had happened… I was scared for you.”

“No.”The word was abrupt, spewing from Kara’s lips before she could stop it.It had been an accident to speak, and she was sure that her flabbergasted expression was the reason Eliza laughed at her.

“I was.”The woman confirmed, the corners of her eyes pinched with humor.“We all were honey.Even if we did think that you had been an evil spy, that didn’t change how we felt.We were angry because we thought you had lied to us—”

“I _did_ lie to you.”

“Maybe,” Eliza murmured, soft eyes seemingly peering into Kara’s soul.“But if you could have told us the truth, without anyone getting hurt, would you have?”

Kara tried to duck her head, and Eliza let her, choosing instead to tug the younger woman closer and hold her in a loose hug.Kara had no idea where Lucy had disappeared to, but she felt shame rise in her.She wouldn’t have told them.Not if it had meant losing them.

She probably would have died with that secret.

“I didn’t mean to hurt anyone… I was just trying… I wanted...”

Eliza squeezed her, moving something back in place in Kara’s heart with the clear affection she was showing.“You were trying to survive; you were trying to keep your daughter alive.No one—” she pulled back and grabbed Kara’s face eyes fiery with their intent.“ _No one_ can fault you for that Kara.No one here _does_ fault you for that.I would have done the very same thing, if it meant keeping Alex alive.”

Kara shivered, her whole-body trembling in Eliza’s arms.“I’m sorry.”

Eliza opened her mouth to reply, but Kara was struck suddenly by a wave of dizziness, the room spinning around her and making her lose her balance.Eliza caught her, guiding her body down to the ground and Kara focused all of her energy into not hurting the woman with her twitching limbs.

“Eliza?”

“It’s ok honey.”Eliza said, holding her close and petting her hair.“That stuff should be out of your system soon.You’re going to be just fine.”

 

~*~

It was the startled choking sound that alerted Alex to something being wrong.In her arms, Kalasin tensed and then started to cry, scrambling against Alex’s neck.They were still in the ‘war room’ and the other Kryptonians present all staggered, Clark putting a hand to his forehead in apparent pain.

At Kalasin’s cries, Astra looked up in concern.“Kryptonite.”She glanced behind her, obviously using her x-ray vision and frowning at what she saw.“Give her to me Brave One.The barrier has been broken, we need to go away.”

Alex didn’t hesitate.She stood with the wiggling toddler and tried to hand her off to Astra.Tried being the operative word.Kalasin struggled something fierce, screaming bloody murder in Alex’s ear and holding on for dear life.Astra broke the hold easily, their current situation not allowing much room for soothing words or persuasion.Before they could take off Alex shoved her phone into Kitai’s hand.

“Don’t break that.I’ll call you with any updates.Don’t go far.”

Kitai nodded, her mouth pinched in discomfort and then she and Astra were gone.Clark had left earlier to go evacuate his own son.

And then it was just the humans and Ni.

A tense silence pervaded the room and then Lena was moving to a computer trying to pull up the cameras they had scattered over the facility.They all knew what had just happened.Somehow Kara had broken the glass that was containing the Kryptonite to her room.If she’d broken it in anger, then that meant that Lucy and Eliza were more than likely injured… or dead.

It was another few seconds before the camera in Kara’s room was displayed on the monitor, Eliza clearly visible and Lucy nowhere in sight.

Then Kara fell, her body seizing in Eliza’s arms and a pain filled scream echoing so far, they heard her from over here.

Alex was suddenly very glad she had allowed Kalasin to be taken; no child should have to hear their parent in such pain.

“I need to talk to my dad.”

“Alex?”Felicity flittered to her side, nervous energy falling off her in waves.

Alex ignored her and raised steady eyes to Oliver and J’onn.“Would you come with me?I might need some help getting him to talk.”

Oliver frowned but nodded, following J’onn’s lead and pushing off the wall to trail her from the room.

Jeremiah Danvers’ cell was located on the other side of the warehouse where they had also quarantined anyone who Batman and Fiora had deemed unsavory.The prisoners there were currently being guarded by the Teen Titans and the Sirens.

Although honestly speaking, Alex had no idea how the Sirens had gotten such a job.It seemed more prudent to keep them _away_ from temptation and bad influences.When they arrived, Selina was pointing a red laser pen at an inmate’s eye while he tried ineffectively to jump out of its path.

Alex sighed and snatched the pen from her hand as she passed, ignoring the scowl she received in turn as her feet led her to Jeremiah’s cell.

Her father was sitting in a metal chair, shackled to the ground and mostly immobile.He still grinned when he saw her.

“Hello Alex.”

“I need information.Your puppet masters are dead, you don’t have any reason to keep their secrets.”

Jeremiah nodded, his amusement growing with his smile.“I have no secrets from my daughter.What do you want to know Alex?”

Her nostrils flared in agitation and J’onn placed a steadying hand on her shoulder.“Everything.”

Jeremiah tilted his head, a hint of disappointment creeping into his eyes.“You sure you have time for that sweetheart?ALFA won’t wait for story time to be over.And I know how badly you want to save the world.”

He said the words like a normal person.Like he wasn’t an evil mastermind hell bent on destroying everything Alex loved.It made Alex sick; filled her with a rage she fought to control.

“When are they going to attack?”

“Attack?Sweetheart haven’t you been paying attention?They’ve already attacked.The sky is filled with them.”

Oliver shifted next to her, his crossed arms tightening against his chest.“We’d appreciate if you didn’t speak in riddles sir.Like you said we don’t have a lot of time.”

“Oliver Queen, right?”Jeremiah asked, voice suggesting he already knew the answer to his question.“Your sister Thea is in Corto Maltese.Have you tried calling her lately?”

Oliver tensed and whipped out his phone, the perceived threat making him need to check on Thea immediately.Alex grit her teeth so hard they hurt.“What did you do to her?”

“Me?Nothing.I’ve been in this chair honey.”

“It keeps dropping the call.”Oliver said as he turned back to them.His anxiety starting to show in the way his fingers twitched at his sides.

Jeremiah hummed.“I’d imagine there must be some sort of interference.”

J’onn slammed the doors to the cell open, striding into the room and grabbing Jeremiah by his collar.His display of anger was uncharacteristic and fit more _Alex’s_ profile but they were talking about the possible end of the world.Alex wouldn’t hold it against him.“I don’t know how you’re blocking me but you better start talking _now._ What is happening and how do we stop it?!”

“Why would I help you Martian.CADMUS showed me what you are; rescued me from a life of isolation. _I_ don’t betray my friends and Lex Luthor _is_ my friend.”

“So was I.”J’onn’s hands relaxed as he realized what Alex had; Jeremiah Danvers was gone.The monster wearing his body was not her father; he wasn’t the man who had saved J’onn; he wasn’t even her mother’s husband.He was CADMUS’ pawn.

That was all.

This was why Eliza had kept him away; it was excruciating to see this imposter wearing her father’s face.

“How do we stop it?”She asked, suddenly exhausted and rubbing the furrow between her brows.

“There is no stopping _it_.”

“It’s the clouds.”Winn stepped up next to them, wary eyes darting between the cages. Alex wasn’t even aware the small man had followed them or for how long he’d been privy to the conversation.Winn was shaking, exhaustion and some fear making his hands tremble as he tried to pass Alex the tablet he was holding. “The interferences… there’s something to those clouds.And whatever it is, it’s getting stronger.We’re losing telecom stations left and right.”

“Ah.”Jeremiah said, his eyes glowing with delight.“Finally, someone who knows how to pay attention.”

~*~

The next time Kara became aware of herself, she was propped on her side on the hospital bed in her cell.A harsh pull in her abdomen made her pause momentarily, feeling woozy and nauseous; two things that were fairly common in her life.She licked dry lips and eventually rolled herself out of bed, ignoring the wave of vertigo and swiping the pitcher of water from the bedside table.The jug was lifted to her lips and she pulled heavy mouthfuls of water that felt divine to her parched throat.When she was done, she let the jug fall to the ground, taking in the rest of her cell.

Although she supposed she could hardly call it a cell anymore being as she broke the glass.

Lucy had said she wasn’t a prisoner.

Nobody had replaced the glass.

Eliza had reminded her that she had a daughter; the time for self-flagellation was well past.She needed to find Kalasin.She would not leave her to the mercy of CADMUS; there was no way in the universe she would allow her daughter to have even an inkling of the life Kara had had to live.

There was no crushed glass on the floor, someone had obviously cleaned up.Still, the steps she took were cautious, poised to run at any moment.

When she stepped over the threshold she paused, straining her now human hearing for anything that sounded out of place.

Nothing.

Her steps were more confident after that, the scrub like clothing she was dressed in creating soft swooshes that filtered down the hall.The more she walked the more Kara found she didn’t care.

She’d forgotten herself _again._

CADMUS had locked her in the dark and tried to wipe her and she’d fallen into the same cycle of depression that she always had.

She’d hurt people; killed people.

She’d killed Cat Grant.

She’d almost killed Alex.

And Alex didn’t want her.

None of those were valid reasons for quitting.

Cat would probably kill her herself if she could see how low Kara had fallen again; all her hard work wasted away.

No.

_No._

Kara had dishonored too many of her loved ones.She would not do any of them the disservice of forgetting the lessons they taught her.

She made her way through the facility aimlessly deciding that she was in what appeared to be some sort of warehouse.And, if Eliza was here, then that meant Alex was very likely here as well.If she knew her ex, and she was pretty sure she did at this point, Alex would have put her in a secure location.Somewhere away from the exit.

Which meant if Kara walked as far away from her cell as she could and followed the next wall from there, then she should come across a door to the outside world.

It was in this way that she made her way across the building, encountering no one for almost ten minutes.

Which is why when she ran into a tall black man dressed in a black polo and military fatigues she startled.

When she saw his face, she panicked.

Hank Henshaw was here.

Hank Henshaw was _here._

Her eyes burned; her heat vision erupting without her consent and slamming into the man in front of her.He grunted in pain and was flung back down the corridor.

To her left someone shot an arrow at her and she cried out as it exploded against her shin, her eyes—still alight—turning to look at the newcomer.

He looked familiar, but he was spirited away by a red blur before a green rhinoceros was charging her.

Kara was slammed hard into the wall, the wind leaving her lungs and causing her heat vision to cut out.The adrenaline-fueled fear was still there however, and she lifted the green animal bodily and flung him at the rest of the people coming at her.A quick glance to her sides showed her that she was surrounded, and she felt her breath quicken, the air in front of her solidifying in ice.

“That is quite enough!”It was the second time she’d frozen, not having expected the new voice that equally calming her and terrifying her.“This is just ridiculous.Kiera, please stop that; these imbeciles don’t deserve the energy consumption.”

“Hey!”That was the green animal, boy, thing… changeling.The green changeling.

The first voice though…

Kara turned around slowly, her eyes watering when she saw the woman in front of her.“Ms. Grant?”

The blonde CEO was dressed to the nines, almost unnecessarily so given their current location.Kara was certain there wouldn’t be any board meetings with presidential candidates taking place in such an environment.

Still, Cat carried herself like she had just stepped off the runway, taking measured steps until she was standing directly in front of Kara, a small smile playing on her lips.“What?Did you think your little laser eyes could really hurt me?Honestly Kiera, I used to go to tanning salons.My skin is used to infrared light.”

Confused, Kara could do little more than tilt her head.She’d seen her die; had listened for her heart to stop.

“But… I—Ms. Grant I am s-s—so s…sor..sorry.I didn’t—" 

Ms. Grant’s eyes had gone soft but movement from her peripheral vision had her whirling, Henshaw’s body clambering to its feet and dusting off his clothes.She felt her eyes heat again and then a tall brunette woman was in front of her, the woman’s eyes alight with their own heat vision that halted hers and saved the man behind her.

“Little one!”That voice.Kara _knew_ that voice.She _knew_ that face.“Little one, calm down.This is not what it seems.”

It was like someone had broken a dam in her brain, memories filtering in faster than she could catalogue and only making her lose more of the fragile control she’d been trying to hold onto.

She _knew_ that voice.

She _knew that voice!_

Kara screamed, rage and pain filling her as the lasers emitting from her eyes intensified, hurtling towards the woman who buckled under the onslaught.

“Little one, please!I do not wish to harm you!”

Hurt her?

_Hurt_ her?

Astra had done nothing _but_ hurt her.

Her mother had told her—had _promised_ her—

Something hit her legs, taking her down from behind and almost making her land on her back.The training she had acquired at CADMUS had her employing some of her flying ability and turning over in midair.

Lena Luthor stood behind her with a gun in her hand, the muzzle pointed at Kara.

Kara blinked in confusion and looked down at her legs searching for a bullet.Hovering over the ground as she was, she had a clear view of the ground below, but could see nothing but floor.

Still…

Lena had shot her.

There was no blood, and she couldn’t see a casing, but the evidence was real.

Lena had _shot_ her; Lena had called them family and then she had shot her.

“Linda…”her friend raised her brows, her expression pleading.“Stand down.”

Kara felt her lips pull back in a snarl.She hadn’t wanted this; they had started this.All she wanted was her daughter.

Kalasin needed her and the more time she wasted here, the further away CADMUS took her daughter.

“Let me go.”

Lena shook her head, “we can’t do that.”

“Enough.”That was Cat again, her mentor’s flushed face stepping back into her line of sight.Ms. Grant was clearly irritated although none of that animosity seemed to be directed at Kara.Cat glared at Lena, “you are not a prisoner Kara, we are just trying to help you.If these Neanderthals would stop for just a second—”

A blaring alarm broke through her speech, causing the woman to mutter a choice few curse words.

Kara barely heard any of them, her mind slowly shutting down at all the stimuli.

Henshaw was here.

Astra was here.

Cat was here.

Lena had shot her.

She couldn’t breathe.

It felt like she couldn’t breathe.

A hand touching her arm sent her back into fight mode, her fist slamming into her opponent’s jaw.Astra reeled back, taking the blow but dodging the flying knee kick that Kara employed shortly after.Her aunt grabbed her leg, pulling her in close and slamming her into the ground.The cry of frustration left her on the impact, stealing precious air from the younger Kryptonian.

Astra pulled back her hand, slamming her fist into the concrete next to Kara’s head as Kara pulled to the side, avoiding the blow and employing her hips to twist out of the hold.Her aunt let her, shoving Kara away, disorienting her with the unexpected movement, and then speeding over to Kara and putting her in a chokehold.

The younger woman could do nothing but scream in frustration, feeling herself start to tire as everything caught up with her.Her anxiety only serving to make her feel ill.

“It is ok.You are ok.Take deep breaths Little One; you are safe now.”

“Let me go!”

Astra pressed her cheek to the side of Kara’s head, her voice wavering under her own emotions.Her aunt didn’t even sound out of breath, just sad.“Never Little One; I will never let you go again.I promise you.”

Kara gasped and writhed in her grip, feeling tears of frustration leak down her face.“You did!You left me!You left me alone!How could you do that?!”

“I’m sorry Kara.I am so sorry.”Kara sobbed, her energy spent as her aunt’s hold turned into a hug, the woman guiding them both down to the floor with more mumbled apologies.“You are safe now; I promise you, no harm will come to you.Not while I am here.I love you Little one, I love you very much.”

Kara screamed, the headache she had been fighting slamming into her at full force.Behind her Astra actually whimpered, her grip loosening.Kara couldn’t even take advantage of it, feeling suddenly too weak to do much more than lift her head.“You were supposed to get me.Mom promised.She said you’d be here.You were supposed to get me.”

“I know.”Astra turned her over in her arms, starting to pet Kara’s hair.Her aunt’s face was set in pain, her mouth pinched and the lines on her face clearly defined.“I failed you Little One.”

“Why?”Kara asked, blinking repeatedly as darkness edged in on her vision.“Why didn’t you want me?”

If Astra responded, Kara didn’t hear it.She felt something wet hit her face and something slimy latch onto her arm.

She knew Bones was there now, but she couldn’t hear anything or see anything.She only knew because she was well acquainted with the slimy cold sensation of Bones’ greedy sucking climbing up her shoulder.

There was a stinging pain near her heart and then she felt nothing.

There was just darkness.

 

~*~

This time when she woke up, she was not alone.She was back in her cell and Alex was seated next to her bed, the pads of the woman’s fingers softly tracing along the veins in her forearm.

Kara didn’t even have the energy to be surprised.

When Alex’s eyes finally found her own and saw they were open and awake, she thought that the agent probably felt the same way.

“Hey.”Alex said softly, dropping her hand to rest against Kara’s own and allowing her eyes to dart rapidly over Kara’s face.“You threw me out of a window.”

There were several tiny cuts littered across Alex’s face; a large bruise stretching across the left side of her head, that warped into a bandage covered wound on her forehead.Her lip was split and her eyes bruised and Kara held no delusions that the rest of her wasn’t just as badly injured.

Still, she’d known Alex long enough to know the agent would barely acknowledge her injuries.

Kara swallowed but nodded.“Sorry.”

Alex hummed.“You have a daughter; Kalasin.She’s safe.”

“She’s safe…”Relief came like a tidal wave and her breath caught in her throat at the unexpected news.Exhaustion came just as quickly and had her turning her head to the ceiling and closing her eyes.There was no use feeling frustrated or angry.Right now, she had to think; needed to figure out if she really had traded one prison for another.If she had been wrong about who Alex was.“But you won’t let me see her.”

“I never said that.”Alex cupped her cheek in her palm, turning Kara’s head back to her.“I lost you there for a bit, I just need to make sure we got the right girl back.”Her thumb stroked along Kara’s cheek bone, her eyes startlingly filled with a _want_ that made Kara’s breath catch.

“I don’t under—rstand… you s…s—said… you said you hated me.That I was nothing and—”Kara tried to fight the speech impediment but she couldn’t, her confusion and hurt incapacitating her speech patterns.

“I know.”Alex whispered, voice laden with sadness and squeezing Kara’s hand.She looked utterly defeated.“I didn’t mean it.I didn’t mean any of it Kara.I just needed Lillian to believe I did.”Alex rolled her lips, glancing away for a second as she tried to find her words.“I know that this is all really confusing for you but I…That man from before?He’s not Hank Henshaw.At least not the one you knew.He’s a shapeshifter—from Mars.Like M’gann, only… He’s my friend.Please… just let me explain everything.”

Kara felt her throat work, trying to say something.Her brain was firing all over the place and it felt like a million tiny women were rushing around her head trying to shut off emergency alarms.

In the midst of her breakdown, she focused on the only thing she could.

Alex.

Alex looked amazing; it felt like she’d been in a desert for years and this was her first sight of water.The Agent was dressed in similar clothing to those Henshaw had been in, with a black polo and black cargo pants.Her hair was longer, but Kara had noticed that in CADMUS, as if she hadn’t gone to her barber in a while.The ends brushed along her collarbones as she leaned forward towards Kara.

“You locked me away…”Kara forced out between heavy breaths.Her eyes squeezing shut as she fought to get her words out. “I thought it was a tr—tr…tri—a mistake, that you wer…re going to come b—back for me but…”

Alex swallowed, her eyes filling with water.The agent pushed away from Kara’s bedside, standing and running both hands through her hair as she let out a noisy exhale.Kara leaned back in the mattress, trying to stop her own tears from coming.She wanted to listen, wanted to hear Alex out but…

But Alex _hadn’t_ come for her.

She’d waited for her.Had waited and waited.

Had held on to her belief and love for as long as she could.

It hadn’t been enough.

_She_ hadn’t been enough.

And now…

Well now, Kara was back in a cell and she obviously was not going to be allowed to leave despite everyone’s claims that she was not a prisoner.

There was a very good chance that her ex had just purchased her for her own scientific pursuits.The DEO loved their experiments just as much as CADMUS did.

“Kara…”Alex paused, her eyes closing as she tried to explain her thoughts. “His name is J’onn J’onnz; I asked him to shift into Cat since we knew she was a target.Whenever Cat wasn’t in the office, J’onn took her place.That night when you attacked her escort, that was J’onn you were attacking; it was J’onn you ‘killed’.Except, Martians are really hard to kill so he regenerated in like ten minutes.After… After the thing on the bridge… I was _pissed._ I thought that you—that what we had—that it was all a lie.I thought you never loved me, that everything you had told me were things that they told you to say.”Alex opened her eyes, her cheeks wet with tears as she shrugged and took a step closer.Her arms folded against her chest and she sighed.“I was arrested and put in a federal prison for a month—that’s what took me so long to find you.I didn’t get your letter until CADMUS pulled me out.And then after… I needed Lillian to believe that I was on her side, so that I could get everyone out safely.It was the only way I could think of.”

Kara pushed herself up, sitting forward, her mind racing with the new information Alex had brought before her.It sounded true…

But…

“But then, where were you?When I woke up?”She shook her head, wrapping her arms tightly around her abdomen and flinching away when Alex tried to touch her.“If that’s all true then… I hur—hurt p…people Alex, I killed… I would have under—rstood if you thought I was a monster—”

“I didn’t.Kara—”

“But if your s…saying that you didn’t… that you were angry and then you weren’t, then why weren’t you her—here?I don’t understand—"

“I know.I know this is a lot and what you must be thinking but Kara it’s not true.No one died that night.There were a lot of injuries but no deaths.Felicity, Kate, and Bruce Wayne put their fortunes together to help the victims and everyone went home.You didn’t kill anyone honey.”

Kara blinked confused beyond belief.Lillian had said… 

_When has Lillian ever told the truth?She told you your family was dead, but Astra is alive.Mon-El and Clark were alive._ Kara swallowed, the voice of reason sounding in her ears as she turned her gaze to her lap.

“You wrote in my notebook.”Alex resumed her seat, her hands dropping between her legs and gripping the chair in a white knuckled grip.The agent’s jaw was clenched, her cheekbones defined as she pushed hair away from her face.“I was _furious_ with you Kara, but then… then I saw what you had written.That was the last piece I was missing for my regeneration formula.And then you wrote your name… our names.Kara Zor-El Danvers…”Kara felt herself blush to the roots of her hair.At the time, she was just doodling, the fantastical idea she’d had of her and Alex joining houses making her scribble their names together with silly hearts around the corners.The more fantastical idea she’d had of Alex ever speaking her real name… of accepting her completely…This time Alex did reach for her and Kara let her take her hands in her own.“I told you once before about a girl—an alien I was looking for.Do you remember?”

Kara nodded, unsure of what this had to do with anything but feeling something inside her chest clench in anticipation.

Alex smiled, her lower lip wobbling and her gaze going to their joined hands.When she spoke, her voice was thick and heavy, rushed but filled with such love Kara felt her own chest tighten.“Her name… her name was Kara Zor-El, last Scion of the House of El.She was Kryptonian and a secret organization kidnapped her when she was fourteen years old.”

“What?”It was the only thing she could think to say.There was no way… if Alex had known her from before, if she had seen her—there was no way.There was just no way.“I don’t… I don’t remember—”

“Because of CADMUS.”Alex rushed, everything about her pleading with Kara to remember her; to believe her.“They wiped your memories honey, they made it so that they could convince you that you weren’t loved or wanted but that isn’t true.That has never been true.I have _always_ wanted you Kara.My mom too—and Astra!Astra has been—”

“Stop.”Kara swung her legs over the side of the bed, standing on shaky legs and putting the mattress between her and Alex.“Just… I need…”She shook her head, trying to clear it.To _understand._ “I remember Astra… I remember… _my mom_ now and Krypton, I—I would have _remembered_ you… How would they—I would have…”

“You spent the first thirteen years of your life with your family—with your aunt.So, it makes sense that you started to remember her first.With all the Kryptonite in your system… Honey, it might just take some time, but I promise you—”

“How?”

Alex blinked, caught off guard but the abrupt question.“What?How do I… promise?Or—”

“How did they get me?If I was—if we were in each other’s lives, then how—”

“CADMUS came. Vicky Donahue had made a stupid play during soccer practice and she banged up my ankle.You were pretty annoyed but you carried me home so I wouldn’t hurt myself.”Alex brought her hands to her hips, her head ducking as she brought her bottom lip between her teeth.“We were walking through the woods back home and you said there was something off about the sound and when I asked if we should make a run for it you said no.You said no because…”Alex’s breath caught, her words starting to break like waves crashing against rocks.Her emotions slammed into her full force and she’d halt as she fought for control, continuing when she thought the wave was gone.“You said no because you’d listened for Eliza and heard that she was upset, and you didn’t… you didn’t want her to take it out on _me …_ So, we stayed in the woods, and you kissed me.You were kissing me and then we were attacked by guys in black tac uniforms.They had something that hurt you, I figured it must have been some sort of sound device.It disabled you, you were clutching your head and crying… you tried to carry me out, but you kept falling.So, I tried carrying you… but my ankle and… you asked me if I trusted you and I said yes and you kissed me again… and you told me you loved me… and you asked me not to hate you forever… that’s the last thing I remember.I woke up under a tree with a massive headache.When I woke up you were gone.I ran home and told my mom; we tried looking but there aren’t a lot of options for finding missing aliens in our country.”

Kara felt her face pinch, none of that sounded familiar but she saw on Alex’s face that she was telling the truth.What she believed to be the truth.

She took a breath, organizing her thoughts with the help of the icy hand of her anger.

“You were looking for me?For Kara Zor-El?”

“Yes.”

Kara nodded, focusing on Alex’s eyes.“You brought me here?”

Alex hesitated, looking for the trap but eventually nodded, “yes.”

Alex _had_ come for her.

“You put me in a cage.”

Alex had imprisoned her.

“ _NO.”_ Some vehemence leaked into her voice then and Alex scowled, her hands fisting in front of her before she very deliberately forced them open.“No.Cadmus… you had so much Kryptonite in you that it was the only safe way to keep you here.We have other Kryptonians—other aliens— and they would have gotten sick if we didn’t put you in an enclosed space. It wasn’t a cage; you weren’t a prisoner.You were in quarantine.”

“It’s a cage.If it wasn’t a cage then I would be allowed to leave.”Alex opened her mouth to interject but Kara glared at her, all of her frustration and pain being directed at the woman in front of her.“The DEO keeps prisoners indefinitely; no trial, no chance of freedom.For crimes way less offensive then what I’ve done.There is no happy ending here Alex.Just be honest with me.”

A flash of hurt crossed Alex’s face, her mouth dropping open as her throat worked; her hands twitching at her sides before dragging through her hair.Again.“Kara…”She started, eyes closed and nostrils flared.“I am not holding you prisoner.No one here is.This is not the DEO.And anyone who wants to come after you… they’re going to have to go through a whole lot of people.Myself included.”

Kara let that sink in; they weren’t at the DEO.This place was… undecided.And Alex… Well Alex had just seemingly aligned herself with a criminal.

Alex had her daughter.

As much as she wanted to believe what Alex had told her—hold on to it—there was still too much that didn’t make sense.The truth was that she didn’t know if she could trust Alex.When she looked at her now… Kara wished she could go back. Just go back to when a look from her human had been enough to soothe her anxieties.

Before Alex had pressed a button and locked her in darkness.

Before she’d come within seconds of snapping Alex’s neck.

But she couldn’t, and she didn’t know who to believe or what… she just knew that she needed to find Kalasin.She needed to get her daughter and get to Artax; at least then she might have a chance of protecting the one good thing she had left.

“Alex… I need to go.I need to find my… friend.”

“Katu?”Alex asked, leaning back in the stool and glancing over her shoulder like she expected the woman to pop up at the sound of her name.Knowing Katu she’d probably unnerved quite a few people with her ability to do just that.“She’s here.We got everyone we could out of CADMUS when we took them down.Anyone who was there when we raided is here now.”

Kara’s eyes bugged, her head swimming as she felt herself start to hyperventilate.Her hands dug into the mattress in front of her and she heard the fabric tear.She knew logically she should have expected something like that; after all the fact that she, Katu, and Kalasin were all alive and not at CADMUS should have clued her into the fact that Alex had done something crazy.Like hijacking CADMUS.

Alex had attacked CADMUS.

Alex had stolen all of their assets.

Which left them with only—

She jerked upright, releasing her hold on the mattress and stalking towards the door as Alex rose to match her step.Kara swayed slightly, the quick movements making her dizzy, but kept her pace fast, ears straining to hear even a hint of Kalasin for her to track.

“I need to go.You need to let me go.”Alex hadn’t tried to stop her, but Kara still felt the need to say the words as she reached for the door.

Alex nodded, her hair brushing her shoulders with the movement.“You can go anywhere you want.Is it okay if I go with you?I want to help; just lead the way.”

Kara swallowed, feeling angry helplessness flood her system.She glanced at Alex even as she strained her senses to find her daughter.“Kalasin—Alex you need to tell me where she is.They put a chip in her head, they can—”

“They can’t.”Alex interrupted, catching Kara’s hand and pulling her back.Hot tears fell on Kara’s cheeks, burning like fire as she fought the sob that wanted to work its way from her throat.Alex cupped her face between her palms, holding her like she was made of glass.“We removed the chip.There’s a doctor here—her name is Soranik Natu—she’s a Green Lantern.She’s operated on about half the people here already, removing chips as she goes.You and Kalasin were the first ones that we worked on.”

“We?”

Alex smiled sadly, fingers reaching up to brush strands of hair away from Kara’s face.“I just got you back Kara… there was no way I was going to let you, or your kid go anywhere without me.”Then she blushed and dropped her hand, fingers going to her neck as she averted her gaze self-consciously.“I couldn’t go in for _your_ surgery.Kalasin had already latched onto me by then and you were giving off so _much_ Kryptonite honey…I didn’t want her to get hurt.So, we played board games instead.”

Kara’s eyebrows shot through her hairline and she let a watery chuckle escape her.“Board games?”

“Yeah.”Alex said with a laugh of her own.“Your kid is a shark.”

Licking her lips, Kara squeezed Alex’s hand feeling like she was standing on a precipice and Alex’s next answer would decide the rest of their lives.“I need to see her… Alex please…”

Alex was already nodding, pulling her back the way they had come and to a room a few doors over from where Kara had emerged.“She’s in here.I figured you’d want to see her as soon as you could, and since Bones sucked out the majority of the Kryptonite, your levels are stable enough that you can hold her.”Alex stopped outside of a door, turning a serious gaze to Kara that ratcheted her trepidation to new levels.“But Kara, if she starts to feel weird or get sick, you need to let her recover.There’s still some Kryptonite in you and it might have an effect with increased exposure.”

Kara nodded quickly, shifting from foot to foot as Alex finally opened the door in front of them.

A hard ball impacted her chest, little arms choking her in a tight hug that Kara returned with just as much fervor.She didn’t even try to hold in her sobs, her legs unable to support her and forcing her to the ground.Surprisingly, Alex caught her, her hand still gripped tight in Kara’s as she sunk to the ground with the small family.

Then Alex was holding her while Kara held Kalasin and it was like something clicked in her chest; that weird shift thing Alex had accomplished when they were together paling in comparison to this feeling of _rightness_.

Because this was everything.

Her daughter was in her arms—chip less.

CADMUS was for all intents and purposes gone.

And Alex…

Alex had _come for her._

She didn’t know anything else about what would happen between them, but she had that at least.

Alex had come for her.

She’d saved her, and she’d saved her daughter.

And even if she didn’t feel that way about Kara anymore, there was no way Kara could be anything but in love with the woman.

Everything.

Alex had given her everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, so first things first. Alex getting her ass kicked in boardgames by kids is my jam. As is the hopeful future bond between Jon and Kally.
> 
> :)
> 
> So lets breakdown the trip back to base. Alex has been getting her ass handed to her for some time and by reason should not be functional. However I need her in the final battle so Raven, my dear lovely soul, she took the edge off the internal stuff. Alex still looks like a punching bag but she's healthy now. For anyone who does not know, Raven has the ability to heal, however since she is also a telepath and telepathy doesn't work on Kryptonian's I'm going to assume her healing doesn't either.
> 
> Then Soranik Natu is a real DC character. She's a green latern who's a badass Nuerosurgeon. Convenient person to remove the CADMUS brain bombs.
> 
> Now back to Kara, she is suffering from Kryptonite poisoning. Think a drug overdose, or severe alcohol poisoning. Her organs are shutting down when they escape CADMUS but with some interjection from our doctors and Artax, she stabilizes. Not out of the woods but stable.
> 
> Also I don't remember if I ever told you guys this, but Artax's name is from the Never Ending Story. It's Atreyu's horse that died in the swamp of despair. Broke my little kid heart it did.
> 
> Anyway, So Kara and Alex are stable. Good.
> 
> Kalasin.
> 
> Kalasin is a chimera, a mix of a bunch of different aliens and metas to try to combine different abilities. One of those is the way martians are able to merge minds and share memories. Kalasin can merge her mind with the people around her and 'live' their memories. She sees how much Kara loves Alex and so she loves Alex. Hence the latching. It was hard to explain without looking through Kalasin's eyes.
> 
> Word of advice for anyone who resues someone from a cage: don't put them back in a cage.
> 
> They might go a little batshit.
> 
> So Kara's first awakeness, we learned Lucy was trans. I'm probably going to use a lot of my note space to remark on this but I feel its important. Warning this might be triggering.
> 
> One of the inspirations for Lucy was a bigot I overheard saying trans women were ugly. He was talking about the Scar Jo movie that she pulled out from, which 1 he got the labels wrong and 2, he was trying to say she was too pretty to play the role anyway. That made me irrationally angry for obvious reasons and, while I don't always agree with trans women (or people in general honestly), they don't deserve to be bullied. It's like if someone picks on your kid brother and so you maybe pour a laxative in a their coffee in the morning. So anyway, even though he probably won't read this I thought it would be nice to take one of the most attractive DC women and represent them as trans. I think Lucy would be proud. And to any anyone who has ever been told your 'ugly' please don't ingest the poison. Go out and get yourself a burger instead.
> 
> And Kara being scared of Eliza will NEVER get old. Like a kid stealing a cookie that one.
> 
> Also, yes. Cat is alive. I mean I didn't even think that would be surprising given that this started as a winter Soldier AU and Cat is kind of like Nick Fury. But yeah, she's alive. She'll get more time next chapter but essentially, way way way back when J'onn and Alex had their first stake out remember? And Alex said if she talked to Winn she'd need J'onn to do her a solid. Well, this was it. Pretending to be Cat, which we know J'onn hates impersonating people. The last words from Cat were just gonna be we already planned for this. Because they had. I just don't think they planned for *Kara* to be the pawn.
> 
> Heartbreaking indeed; Alex's carefully masterful plan torn down by her own girlfriend. Travesty.
> 
> Then Astra; Astra was supposed to reunite with her family, re: Kara and Kal-El when she landed but by the time she did, Kal was an adult and Kara was with the Danvers. Kitai was sick and she had no idea if she would make Kara sick as well and it was a mess. So she left Kara in the best place she could and it still backfired. The El story is a tragedy.
> 
> Still at least in this version of events, Kara was never meant to be alone. She was never meant to be a teen mom on a foreign planet with no prospects or education. Alura tried to make it so she had a family.
> 
> Astra faced Kara's ire; Kara had a breakdown; no one handled that well at all... it was a lot.
> 
> Then the reunion. My babies finally got to see each other again and I personally think Alex handled that very well. Especially given she had had her skull cracked open not to long ago. Kara too, although her mind pretty much just kind of collapsed towards the end there. She's been through a lot. She's allowed a breakdown or two.
> 
> Annnddd... Now I'm out of space so please if you didn't before, read the beginning note about possible restructuring.
> 
> TTFN 
> 
> Chronicles


	22. This is War pt 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part 1 of the Final Battle

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I have been majorly sick all weekend and I can't find it in me to write up the history of the story. That's probably not even a great word choice and I apologize. Anyway, basically last chapter was post rescue, Kara beat a bunch of people up and reunited with her daughter. Oh yeah and Kitai and Cat are alive. Yay.
> 
> If you need more detail you'll need to re-read it.
> 
> I also updated the chapter count. The epilogue turned into a 20k monster as well so I'm probably gonna break that up too. Just read the whole thing before waving your pitchforks please...
> 
> Ok I think that's all I need to tell you.
> 
> Song: This is War- 30 Seconds to Mars

** This is War **

_ Part 1 of 2 _

“Alex!”Winn’s voice was a distant sound in Kara’s ears, she barely acknowledged the echo against the solid sound of Alex’s heartbeat.“We have to show you something.”

Alex said something in turn and more words were exchanged but Kara ignored all of them.She was too tired to participate in whatever they were talking about.Alex’s arms tightened around her, making Kara squeeze Kalasin in turn.They hadn’t moved from their spot in front of Kalasin’s room.At least not as far as Kara could tell.To be fair she was pretty out of it.

This was however the first time she remembered that someone had interrupted them.

The quickening of Alex’s heartbeat had her tuning back into the real world slowly and then all at once, the aspects of the conversation rushing in like static over her ears and making her squint.

“They can’t just decide that!”Alex was saying, her voice agitated.“The whole worlds at stake and their idea of a good time is sending a bunch of fighter pilots up into an unknown entity?Those soldiers have families; people who care about them!”

“Hey, we get it.”That was Felicity.“But, this wasn’t our idea.Apparently the President has decided to accept Lex Luthor on his council.The attack is already under way.”

Alex’s body was as rigid as a board and when Kara looked up her jaw was clenched as she glared at her friends.“They’re listening to _that_ piece of shit?! _That’s what humanity’s future is going to be trusted to?That fucking—_ This is so stupid!We don’t even know who these people are!What they want!We can’t just attack preemptively, knowing absolutely nothing that could help us!”Some part of Kara was amused that the woman kept her voice low even through her anger, obviously trying to preserve the small bit of peace they had carved out in the maelstrom.“Whoever this guy is, he’s smart!He’s had this entire game mapped out before we even knew he existed and we need to be—”

“His name is Brainiac.”Kara fought a yawn, enjoying the soft tickle of the sun’s rays on her skin.Alex had explained that Lena had installed skylights for her Kryptonian guests to give them as much access to Earth’s yellow sun as possible.Not that it was much help with the grey skies.“He’s very strong.”The trio went silent and Kara twisted her head to look at Winn.“May I borrow a pen and paper, please?”Winn blinked at her, his surprise at her cognition almost making Kara smile.She accepted the proffered notepad that Felicity handed over, Winn still standing gob smacked next to her.Drawing with a slumbering Kalasin in her arms was difficult but she made do, her hands blurring as she sketched her thoughts on paper.“This is him.He has some sort of forcefield that prevents him from being hurt.Siobhan’s Banshee cry had no effect on him either so we pretty much would have just gotten our butts handed to us.”

“They’ve breached the clouds.”Felicity said, her eyes on her screen.

Alex leaned forward slightly, making Kara’s pencil skid across the page.“And?”

The computer genius shrugged, confused. “Nothing.They went in and then a whole lot of nothing.They just never came out.”

“Not sure that’s a good thing.”Alex sighed out.

She handed the sketch of ALFA’s leader over to Alex and then pressed her nose back into the woman’s neck, inhaling deeply as she felt more energy filter into her body.Kara was still a lot smaller than she had been when she’d gone back to CADMUS but she felt a whole lot stronger in turn.Whatever treatment they had been giving her had worked very well but it had also served to make her feel kind of like a cat on catnip.

To be fair, there was every chance that that had more to do with her becoming delusional after so much emotional and physical exhaustion than from any treatment she had undergone but she didn’t really care at this point.

“You fought him before?”Alex asked, one hand holding the sketch and the other running soft fingers through Kara’s hair.“When?”

“When you were in the sewer.”Kara leaned into Alex’s touch.“Lillian sent us to stop him but then I heard you screaming for help so I went to you instead.”Alex’s heart stuttered and Kara frowned, pulling away slightly to look up into her face.“Sorry, I didn’t mean to bring up bad memories.”

“You didn’t.I just hadn’t realized… what else do you know about him?”

Kara shrugged, laying her head back over Alex’s heart.“Just that whatever is happening to your sky, he summoned it.That’s what he was doing the day I fought him.”

“Wait summoned?As in a person?”Winn sounded aghast… and slightly excited. 

“Hey,” Alex stroked her cheek prompting her to open one eye.“Can you help us out?We need to know everything you know about ALFA; about what their plan is.”

~*~

It turned out that Kara knew a lot about ALFA.

About ALFA’s leader.

When Lillian had sent her and Siobhan in, she had fully intended for them to end the ALFA threat, so she’d given them everything they would need to accomplish the endeavor.

The fact that they hadn’t succeeded would have normally meant that Kara would have been wiped but, since Lillian hadn’t been able to wipe her, she had retained all the information they had given her.

Such as his plans of transporting people—humans, aliens, and metas alike—across galaxy.With or without their permission.

He had primed Earth to be a slave colony; and the bigots and idiots with money for brains had backed his play.

CADMUS had been small change for ALFA.They were talking about a full-on intergalactic war.

Alex had honestly not been prepared for that.

She hadn’t even packed her bathing suit.

“Does he have any weaknesses?”Alex asked, running a hand over her face.They were back in the war room and Kara had just disassembled a shit ton of what they thought they knew.

This wasn’t just a few sectors of disgruntled aliens, meta’s and humans across the globe.This was a whole lot of pissed off humans, metas, and aliens spread across a bunch of different _planets._

“The only one I know of is his belt.Lillian put a note in that his belt gave him some sort of advantage.”Kara leaned further back in her chair, Kalasin awake and happy in her arms as she worked her way through a bowl of mashed sweet potatoes.“Now that I’ve fought him, I’d have to guess that that or his suit powers his force field.”

“Just how does he plan on getting all of these aliens here, exactly?I mean that would require a Titanic sized ship.We would have noticed a Titanic sized ship.”

“Felicity…”

“What I would have!”

“Regardless,” Oliver continued, “we can’t assume that he doesn’t already have his people in place.Lin— _Kara,_ do you know when he planned on making his move?”

Alex felt terrible for asking so much of the woman, she was barely back from CADMUS.Had barely gone through any sort of recovery… and she looked _exhausted._

When this was all over, Alex was going to make sure she could relax; was going to take her somewhere far away from here where they could—

No.

She couldn’t do that.

Kara had had a plan, she’d been set on going to that interdimensional portal.

_But,_ a small voice whispered, _that was before you removed the chips from their heads._

True.

That was very true.

Before she could speculate more on Kara’s future and her place in it, the blonde was standing, moving Kalasin to her hip and standing in front of the world map Lena had up.

“These blue lights, what do they represent?”Kara asked, in lieu of answering Oliver’s question.

Lena moved to stand next to her, although she kept some distance between them causing the corners of Kara’s lips to turn down.

Alex couldn’t imagine what must be going through the woman’s head.The people she had befriended during her tenure as Cat’s assistant were all treating her like she had cooties, sans Eliza and Cat.Even Alex, who had been holding her a mere hour ago was now on the opposite side of the room from her, seemingly detached and disinterested.

Alex knew it wasn’t intentional, at least not on her part, but it was hard to know how to act in front of Kara now; what was appropriate behavior for a brainwashed Kryptonian?Alex certainly didn’t know and so she couldn’t yell at Winn for burying his face in his laptop and barely even looking up when Kara spoke or walked or existed. The dweeb.

The thing was that for Kara, none of them had really changed.She’d always known who they were and what they represented.For them, Linda Taylor no longer existed.And they had no idea who Kara _was_ or how to treat her.

Her friends thought she was a stranger.

Alex thought that must have been very lonely.

“The points of the electrical grid.Well, _my_ version of the electrical grid— intersections, powerhouses, on-grid/off-grid—anything that has an inkling of power is shown here.We’re monitoring any large surges in electricity.”Lena paused to offer a sardonic smile.“Usually the bad guy tends to fuck up by showing us exactly where they are.”

Kara hummed and pointed at the map.“Well they’re there.”

Alex squinted at the point, unable to see anything out of the ordinary.“What makes you say that?”

“The light goes out every 6.77 seconds.Watch.”A barely there flicker was seen almost as soon as she finished speaking, the group crowding around her to see what she was talking about.“Your bad guy doesn’t really want to be seen Lena.They don’t want you to know where they are.I’d check there first though.”

“I’d trust her.”Astra said, “she always had a quick mind.Quick everything.She held records in all of our races.Fastest flyer I’ve ever seen.”

Kara blushed and looked away, looking extremely uncomfortable with her aunt’s words and the proud, wistful way she had said them.It made Alex’s heart ache for them both.

Felicity frowned, her fingers already flying over her tablet as she and Winn ducked their heads down together.

“That’s Africa… Egypt… Giza?”Winn’s head popped up.“We’re looking for a pyramid? No, Oil!Everyone always wants oil!”

“Shit.”Lena cursed, stepping back from the map and grabbing Winn’s tablet. “Shit.”

“Please tell me that’s a good shit.”Alex pleaded, already feeling a headache coming on.“Like a eureka kind of shit.”

“If I had to guess, it would be a no.”Felicity said, rounding the table and tapping something that made her screen reflect on the big monitor.The Stargate SG-1 banner displayed proudly on the screen.

“She has a point!”Oliver warned Alex, finger already out to dismiss whatever snarky comment he thought she would levy against his wife.

Alex rolled her eyes, but fixed her attention on Felicity expectantly.

“I do have a point Alexandra!”Felicity tapped some more keys and a photo of an actual stargate, albeit an old and decrepit stargate popped up alongside her first photo.“See this?This is a stargate.”

“Oh, for the love of—”

“No, she’s right!”Lena cut off Lucy’s impatient huff, shouldering over to Felicity’s side and putting up yet another stargate photo, this one in someplace very, very cold looking.Both nerds looked at everyone as if they had solved everything and deserved an award of some kind.“They’re stargates.”

Alex looked over the heads of the nerds at Oliver who looked just as lost as her.Her gaze landed on Kara next, who looked more interested than anything else and when Alex finally chanced a glance at Astra she saw the woman looked slightly concerned.

“These gates are dead.”Astra said, her arms tight across her chest.“They haven’t been used in a millennium.”

_That_ brought Alex up short.

“Wait, what?Hold every phone and ask again what?”Lucy’s hands slammed down in front of her, her fingers white knuckling the table.

“Stargates are real?”Alex asked.“Like legit, I’m gonna go visit the moon real?”

J’onn deep voice rumbled as he looked at the photos and the map thoughtfully.“More like humans used to be able to visit Krypton and Mars real, but it’s the same idea.”

“WHAT?!?”Winn’s geekdom surpassed Alex’s rapidly, and he used his empty hands to grip J’onn’s biceps.“You’re saying humans left earth!?Like in Star Trek?!”

“Like in Stargate!”Felicity held.

“Like in Stargate!?”Winn corrected.

J’onn looked bemused but nodded and Alex ran another hand down her face.This was all too much.Way, way too much.

“So Stargates are a thing that no one ever told me about that can transport large bodies of people across planets… do we know where they are?”

“Kara just showed us the one in Giza, and the one I know exists is in Antarctica.I’m not sure if there are anymore…maybe in—”

“There’s one in Nebraska.”Astra offered, looking just as tired as Alex felt.

Lucy scoffed.“Nothing is in Nebraska.”

“I remember one in South America, the mountains of Chile to be exact.”J’onn frowned thoughtfully.“If the records have remained true, there should only be the four on earth.”

Alex nodded, “so we’re looking at Egypt, Antarctica, Chile, and Nebraska… that totally doesn’t sound impossible at all.Any chance one of them is broken?”

“The one in Antarctica would be powerless to all but the Makers at this point.And since all Green Martians are gone and I plan on accessing nothing…”

“Wait, the _Green Martians_ made these gates?”Winn shrieked.

J’onn nodded.“We partnered with the natives of the lands; taught them our ways and set up trade with some of the peoples.The great empires of the time were started with our help.Atlantis was one of them.”

Winn looked like he might faint.

“Worse space dad ever.”Alex muttered under her breath, although the amused glance Kara shot her made it known that anyone with super hearing had been able to hear her.

“I would like to point out that it was a joint effort with the Kryptonians.”Astra said, her eyebrow raised at the perceived slight.“Without our crystals they would just be fancy pieces of rock.”

J’onn rolled his shoulders.“Everyone is entitled to their own opinion General.”

Astra took a step forward and Alex’s hand shot out to land on her bicep.

“Ok,” Vasquez said quickly stepping between the two aliens and somehow remaining as cool as a cucumber.“So, we know the stargates locations which means that this is a very real possibility of ALFA’s plans.Especially as we can see that there’s some electrical activity near the one in Giza.”

“Can we get satellite imagery?”Oliver asked Felicity, peeking over her shoulder at the computer in her hands.

“No.”Felicity said with a huff of annoyance.“All satellite feeds are down and the Palmer Tech satellite isn’t over anything we need to see.”

“They commandeered the satellites.”Kara said, setting Kalasin on her feet and carefully blowing her breath into her palms.When she pulled them away from her face, there was a perfect sphere of ice.Her heat vision caused some fissures to appear and Alex realized she had just created a globe.“That’s why they were after all of those CEO’s.They needed access to their satellites.Ms. Grant told them no, which is why they tried to kill her.Also, because Maxwell Lord entrusted his satellites into her possession after he had already signed a deal with ALFA.She had too much power.Now with all the pieces laid out in front of me I can also assume that Dirk Armstrong was bought as well.With Cat out of the picture, control of CatCo and Lord Tech satellites would have gone to him and he would have probably seen a massive payday.”Her hands moved over the globe she had formed and a quick flash of her breath and heat vision in conjunction had several tiny spheres of floating fire hovering over the ball in odd intervals.“These are all of the satellites ALFA currently has in their possession.”

Cat frowned at the image that displayed.Her own CatCo satellites were now enveloped in a belt like structure around the globe.The Palmer Tech satellite however was safely hovering out of reach.

“Well,” Cat allowed, obviously miffed.“Some of us have all the luck.How did you know I turned them down?”

Kara shrugged, handing the globe to her daughter as a toy now that she had shown them what she needed to.“You asked me to go through your e-mails.I didn’t think anything of the encoding at the time but a month in isolation makes the mind wander.I have an eidetic memory so I was able to break down the code as a sort of game.Kept me somewhat sane.”

Cat’s face went soft again, but Alex felt her ire rise within her.“Wait a second, you knew why they were after you?And you didn’t tell us?”

Cat rolled her eyes.“Honestly Scully, why would I do your job for you?Winslow, would you please go into my personal files and run the program called Lois Lane.”

Winn’s eyes got very large but he quickly typed at his computer.“Done.”

“What did that do?”Felicity asked, trying to get a look at his screen.

“It blew up my satellites.”Cat said with a sigh, staring wistfully as they watched something plummet to earth on the news feed.“When Director Henshaw approached me about assuming my persona… well I thought it best to take certain measures.He agreed.”

Clark sped off and sped back in a matter of minutes, the balls of fire that were Cat’s satellites no longer a problem.He gave her an unimpressed look.“Cute.”

“And ineffective.”Lena mused.“The ring of energy is still flowing.That didn’t do anything.”

“Well,” Cat said looking offended, “now I’m sad.”

Alex pinched her brows.“When this is all over, you and I are going to have words.”She turned to glare at an unrepentant J’onn.“You too.”

“People.”Vasquez, ever the voice of reason, stepped up to the table.“We have a planet to save, maybe stop with the Bad Girl Club auditions for a second?”

“We can also assume the gate in Nebraska is totaled as well… considering we accidentally dropped Fort Rozz on top of it.”

“Oh.” Lucy deadpanned to Kitai, who smirked at her.“Of course.”

“I was injured and ill, my piloting skills are legendary.”Vasquez’s eyes tracked the Kryptonian as Kitai took an authoritative step forward, one hand resting on her hip and the other pushing her fringe back.Alex noticed Vasquez noticing but said nothing.Interesting development.“What we need to focus on is how to shut them down.How are they getting power exactly?”

“We have no idea.It’s not like they’re patched into the grid.”Lena was obviously frustrated.

Alex averted her eyes when she saw Lucy sneak a hand squeeze under the table.“Well how were they powered in the show?”

“Ooo!Winn exclaimed, “this one time they used a truck battery and—”

“That is the part I will have to say is fiction.These gates would require a massive energy source to get started after the centuries they have gone unused.We also did not use cabling when they were built.We had no need.As Astra said, the gates are powered by crystals.”J’onn said.

Alex scratched at her ear, her mind analyzing the problem in front of her rapidly.She desperately wished for a ball right about now...Kara handed her one made of ice, a shy smile on her face that made Alex’s stomach twitch.She cleared her throat loudly, nodding at the stargate photo.“Which leaves unwired power designs; solar, wind, water… maybe geothermic.”

“Why not two birds with one stone?”Lena asked, “if they were after the satellites…”

“They would have blinded us,” Felicity agreed, hands rubbing together in front of her.“They would have essentially cut us off from communicating with each other.”

“Exactly.But satellites pull their energy directly from the sun.”Lena continued, grey eyes intent as she and Felicity volleyed their ideas off of each other.

“Which would give them a huge jump from the solar panels.And, considering they have over twenty satellites at their command, it’s not like they’ll run out of juice anytime soon.”

Alex frowned… 

“No.” That was J’onn.“Even with all that they’d have to choose between opening the gate or sustaining the gate.They couldn’t do both…”

“…Earth is closest to the sun in January… the attack at the gala…”

“…They were trying to get one more satellite to store the energy!”

“Lena,” Alex prompted, thoughts finally aligning in her head.“What’s the next astrological event?”

Lena looked baffled.“How on earth should I know?”

“There is a comet.”Cat supplied, looking unimpressed with all of them.“The native’s believed it to be a great Ancestor coming to visit them.The Mayan’s and the Inca even held festivals in its honor.It’s supposed to enhance the field of the sun or something.It passes every 100 years so everyone’s going crazy over it.Sozin’s comet.”

“That’s what they’re waiting for.”Alex said, as she simultaneously realized the reason behind all the indigenous references she had received when she’d first taken the case.ALFA surely liked to play the long game.

“They have enough energy to _get_ them open, not _keep_ them open.With that comet, they’ll be able to do both!”

“When is this comet exactly?”

Winn grabbed his tablet back, punched a few keys and looked up.“April 6th.”

“…”

“…”

“…”

“…”

“That’s today isn’t it?”Winn asked with a wince.

Well shit.

~*~

“I do not understand why you would think I would need to use the alternate dimension.You said that CADMUS was gone. You said that Lillian was—”

“I know what I said Kara.”Alex stuffed the toy bear Harley had given to Kalasin into a bag, her eyes darting around the sparse room to make sure she hadn’t forgotten anything.“But this will just be for a little while.Just until I can—”

“Until you finish getting yourself killed.”Kara’s tone was accusatory and Kalasin watched with wide eyes as the two adults squared off.Alex had flinched at Kara’s words but steeled herself when she saw Kalasin duck back behind her mother’s legs, obviously afraid of Alex’s reaction.

“That was a low blow Kara.I’m not that person anymore.”

Kara scoffed, her arms crossing against her chest as she glared at the Agent.“Says the injured woman going off to do battle alone.”

“I won’t be alone.”

“You’re sending me away!”The Kryptonian’s eyes flashed, her body rigid as she squeezed her biceps in frustration.“Maggie is—who’s supposed to be watching you out there?”

Alex let the bag she was holding fall limply to her side and huffed in exasperation and amusement.“Did you forget that you have a cousin and an Aunt—both whom love you very much by the way—who are more than willing to fill that role?I have M’gann and Oliver and—”

“Alex!”Kara pleaded, eyes no longer angry but very, very afraid.“ _You are sending me away_.”

And Alex suddenly got it.She understood.

As Linda, Kara had been terrified of being found out and left out in the cold.It had kept her silent and worked handily in Lillian’s favor.

And now… now her secret was out and she was still being sent away from the small family they had created together.

Alex was sending her away; abandoning her.

Once again, her choice was being overruled by people who thought they had more power than her.

And Alex would have been angry about it—she _was_ angry about it—but she also didn’t care how angry either of them got as long as Kara was alive and well and safe.

Staring longingly at Kara for a moment, Alex finally dropped the bag, crossing the room in three large strides to grab the woman up in a tight hug.“Yeah I am.But I’m doing it to protect you.”

“Look how well that turned out for us the last time!”Kara sneered, stubbornly keeping her arms tucked to herself but burying her head in Alex’s shoulder.

“You don’t even remember the last time.”

“That’s not the point!”

“No,” Alex agreed, gently stroking her fingers though strands of gold.“The point is that I was a kid back then; we both were.”She pulled back and cupped Kara’s cheeks.“But Kara, we’re not little kids anymore.We have responsibilities; we both have people we need to protect.This isn’t your fight.”

“It’s _your_ fight Alex.”Kara finally dropped her arms, her hands reaching up to wrap around Alex’s wrists.

“Yeah… I don’t want you to be scared ok?Kara I’m better now.”Alex insisted, tightening her grip when Kara tried to pull away from her.“I’m serious!Kara, J’onn made me better! _You_ made me better!I’m not going to go off on some death mission.I have too much I wanna do.”She bounced on her toes, trying to get Kara to look at her, pressing their foreheads together as a last resort.“Hey, please… I’m just… I’m asking you to have faith in me, like I do in you… that’s all I’m asking for.Please, Kara…”

Kara’s eyes were bloodshot, wet, and angry but she nodded.Accepting the bag that Alex gave her with her and Kalasin’s things.

“Artax is going to get you, Kalasin, Jon, and Lois to safety.He’ll monitor the situation and let you know if it’s safe to come back through the breach.I’m not exactly sure what you’ll be able to see on the other side but Artax tested it and he said it’s safe.”

“Do you trust him?”

“Of course not.”Alex said with a smile, giving Kara’s cheek one last stroke before dropping her hand.“That’s why I pushed Clark in.”

“… He volunteered, didn’t he?”

“Semantics.”

“Alex…” The earnest expression on Kara’s face made her heart stutter, and she swallowed back the lump that formed in her throat.“Are you absolutely sure about this?”

Taking Kara’s hands in her own, she squeezed them gently, memorizing the lines on her girl’s knuckles before turning a gentle gaze to blue eyes.Kara was so beautiful.She wished she had the words to tell her as much.To apologize for the mistakes she had made; to explain what she was thinking and feeling… but she couldn’t.Not like this.

Not now.

It would feel too much like a goodbye.

“I am absolutely sure that I can do this.”Alex asserted, drinking in everything about Kara in the precious few minutes left to her.“I need you safe.You and the little Calliou over there.”

Kara wrinkled her nose and pulled her hands away.“That was rude.My daughter is not that annoying.”

“I was referring to the baldness but… interesting that you watch kid shows.

“Winn watched kid’s shows!I was just there.”

“Of course.”Alex pursed her lips to the side and tilted her head.“See you after?Even if just for a little while?”

Kara managed a shaky nod and a wobbly smile.“Of course.”

And then Alex was hugging Kalasin, squeezing the child tight to her chest and whispering her new—but permanent—affection.

Next to her, Clark stepped up with his little family and she had to fight not to let her tears escape as Jon stepped up to her.

“Rebel Alliance for life?”She asked, voice thick.

Jon threw her a salute and then promptly wrapped his arms tightly around her torso, nearly squeezing her to death.“I can still come with you!I’m strong now!I’ve been practicing.”

“Jon.”Clark started, taking a step towards his son but Alex quickly shook her head and stooped to her nephew’s level.

“Hey.No one is questioning your ability Jon but this isn’t your fight.Your fight is—your only battle here on out is to protect—”

“You!”Jon insisted, grabbing her forearms as tears tracked down his cheeks.“I wanna protect _you._ I wanna be a hero like _you_.You just have to let me try.I’ve been practicing, I promise.”

“Thumper… there is _no one_ I trust more but I can’t.I need you safe… if I’m going to have even a shot of making it out of this then I need to know you’re safe.I can’t do this any other way.”

Jon’s lip wobbled and he hurled himself at her chest.Alex caught him, holding him close as he tried to calm himself down.“Your birthday is coming up.Promise me that I’ll see you then?We can have a party.I won’t even make you wear the hat.”

Alex blinked at the ceiling, clutching the boy’s head as she wondered how the hell she was supposed to pull this off.“I love you Thumper.I’ll wear the stupid hat if you want me to.”

“I’m sorry for hurting you.”Kara was saying to Clark, eyes watching him warily as he tried to coax Kalasin from behind Kara with an extended hand.“And for destroying the bridge… I was… not myself.”

Clark gave her a kind smile.His Kansas boy smile.“I know that Kara.I’m not mad; not at you.Besides, you won that fight fair and square.Astra wasn’t lying when she said you were _fast.…_ I hope when this is all over that we can talk though?I have so much I want to tell you.I never stopped looking for you.I know CADMUS must have spun a different story and I can’t imagine what you must think of me but… I just want you to know that you were never far from my thoughts.”

“Yeah…”Kara nodded thoughtfully, glancing down at Kalasin before stooping and lifting her daughter in her arms.“Hey sweetie this is your big cousin.His name is Kal-El… Like you.That’s where your name comes from Kally.”Her daughter smiled shyly and gave a high-pitched giggle before burying her face in her mother’s neck.Meanwhile, Clark didn’t even try to hide the tears that streamed down his face.Kara reached over and gripped his large hand in hers, squeezing slightly.“I didn’t remember everything but I knew I had a baby cousin.I remembered that you were important and I did everything I could so that they would never know who you were; that you existed… There was a ship… They showed me a burned-out husk and I knew that you were dead.I mourned you Kal… I think a part of me…I think I wanted a second chance or maybe just to honor you… So I named my daughter after one of my favorite people in the universe.”She offered him a wry grin, her own eyes still wet but her cheeks remarkably dry.“At least I _think_ you were a favorite… my brain’s still a little fuzzy.”

Clark barked a laugh and then enveloped her in a tight hug.“We’re not done cuz.I promise you, we’ll rebuild what they took from us.”

Kara nodded and Alex turned her own attention back to the boy in her arms.Hugging had never been her thing but she was having a marathon of them today!

She even hugged Lois, the woman feeling every bit as strong and fierce as her reputation alluded to.

“Kick their asses.”Was all Lois offered before they were all gone, teleported off to Sanctuary by Raven where Artax had the dimensional fold in place.The demoness would return once they were safely tucked away but it was the fastest option they had available to them.

And the most discrete.

Alex only hoped this Sanctuary was as discrete but Artax, the rude little robot that he was, hadn’t let up.It would be easier to defend it he had insisted.

Alex only cared that it was far, far away from what was about to take place.

“You ready?”Kate came up beside her where she was still staring at the empty space that had held Kara, her bow staff strung across her shoulders as Lucy checked her guns over at a table behind them.

They were all on the main floor of the warehouse; the entirety of the team checking weapons, tech, intel, or just lounging around.All of them having been privy to all the pieces of Alex’s heart flying away without her.

“To stop a bunch of psychopaths who want to take over the world and either annihilate or enslave anyone who doesn’t agree with them?”

“Yep.”

“Nope.”

Kate smiled brittlely.“Yeah, me neither.”

“We have the Titans.” Alex offered, looking up at the redhead and then glancing over her shoulder to see the Teens stuffing their faces with waffles and playing some sort of game while Raven meditated in mid-air.

“ _Teen_ Titans.”Kate corrected.

“Oliver’s team?”

“I hate them.”

“Bruce?”

Kate gagged.

“Astra and Kitai?”

Kate paused.“Badasses.I like them.There might be hope for us yet.”

“You at least are wise.”Kate startled terribly and Lucy snickered as Astra joined the small group, Vasquez taking a spot near Lucy and starting on her own guns.Astra squinted at the spot Kara’s group had disappeared at.“We will need people with brains to survive this foolish plan.”

“Forgive me if I’m wrong but the giant spaceship that is currently circling over our heads is a pretty big indicator of “bad guy”.”

“Perhaps.”Kitai was sitting next to Raven, also meditating, her sword naked in her lap.“It is also a very certain indicator of “trap”.”

“Agreed.”Sara voiced from her spot next to the Kryptonian.Also meditating.

“Would somebody shut the three caballeros up?We’re trying to be _optimists.”_ Harley swung her bat down hard in her hand, sticking her tongue out at the zen trio.

“We’re all going to die.”Alex said, a note of acceptance in her voice.

“I will fly with you again in Rao’s light Brave One.”

Alex smiled, the words high praise from any Kryptonian.

Winn poked his head in with a sneaky grin.“You know, I’m friends with your niece so maybe I could fly—”

“No.”

“Ok.”

~*~

The plan was fairly simple in the end.

They knew that the satellites were powering the gates.Without a power source the gates wouldn’t turn on.

It seemed simple enough.Decommission the satellites, and allow Superman and The Martian Manhunter to catch them as they fell from the sky.It would be temporary until they could bring ALFA in.

Unfortunately, none of the world governments saw it that way.

They had all said no.

Every last single one of them.

Alex was left to wander how many pockets ALFA had lined, and who among the naysayers were just outright stupid.

It didn’t matter.The electrical surges near Giza and in the Andes were getting stronger.

They were out of time.

And the President of the United States of America had just given Lex full rights to combat the enemy with all of his substantial weaponry.

That he and his mother had stockpiled in National City.

With civilians.

Which meant there was a very real possibility that Lex was about to destroy her home.

So.

New plan.

Superman and Martian Manhunter would fly up and take the satellites down by hand.

It had been simple.

Foolproof.

Until someone had launched a nuke into the damn sky!

Clark had caught it quickly and had taken it out of the atmosphere to explode safely.Or at least he had tried to.

Those clouds.

Alex had known there was more to those damn clouds.

They had come _alive_ as soon as Clark had breached their surface, and all any of them had been able to hear was the sounds of his screaming.

J’onn had tried flying in after him but had had to dodge multiple cloud tentacles shooting out at him and trying to bring him into their midst.

The Man of Steel had fought his way back to earth but it had clearly been an arduous and bloody battle.And, with the clouds now blocking out the sun, there wasn’t much left to speed up his healing factor.

“The hell was that thing?”Alex asked as she placed a thick bandage over a slash in Clark’s chest.Her brother hissed in pain, his body recoiling from her touch and only serving to make her press down harder.

“A Galactoid.”J’onn said, his voice and face haunted.“But they were meant to be extinct… I… they eat world’s… the last time one was defeated the planet was sacrificed to kill it.”

“Yeah, that’s not going to happen.”Lucy asserted, pulling off one of Clark’s boots and making him howl in pain as the sticky blood tore his skin from his body.

So.

New plan.

Take on the evil spaceship.

They’d just finished finalizing plans for _that_ when ALFA finally attacked.

Hordes of aliens and metas and their sympathizers took to the streets around the globe and simply started massacring the people closest to them.

There was no filter.

No way to tell who they would attack next.There was just blood.

The monitor that Felicity had set up playing the channels that Cat deemed appropriate.

Although what the hell Cat Grant was still doing around _Alex had no damn idea!_

What she did know was that there was no way they would be able to save all of them.

There were too few of them and too many of ALFA.

What the fuck was she supposed to do now?

Clark had risen at once, his tattered uniform patched together by tape and bandages as he made to go fight them all anyway.

Except there hadn’t really been a need.

The cameramen/women on the ground all took in different shots of what was happening; the surprise hand being dealt was delivered to Alex’s team in full HD.Thank you, technology.

Just as quickly as ALFA had risen, they were being beaten back.

By Fiora.In _France!_

Fiora who Alex hadn’t seen since the extraction from CADMUS.

Fiora whose son had been killed by humans.

Fiora whose family had lost their _planet_ because of humans.

And not _just_ Fiora, but Katu as well; Kara’s friend riding some sort of hairy rhinoceros as she yelled quite comically at the foes surrounding her in… Canada?

And was that Bob?

And with them were hundreds— _thousands_ of aliens and metas met ALFA on the battlefield.Turning the tide long enough that the humans were able to arm themselves and fight back.

Well fuck.

That was very, very unexpected.

And also, very short lived since the TV feeds cut off shortly after that.

“Phones are down too.”Winn confirmed, typing rapidly at his keyboard.“I jimmy rigged a radio frequency on the old telephone lines to broadcast on the new cabling.”

“What kind of cabling?”Felicity asked as she squinted at the code she was writing.

“All the cabling.Why limit myself?As long as you are near some form of cable we should be able to communicate.The range is only about 500 feet though so don’t get fancy.”

Felicity’s eyebrows shot up and she looked super impressed, pausing in her typing to give Winn a nod of respect.“And all I did was create my own wi-fi network.”

“You did that when exactly?” Lena asked Winn as she ripped his computer from him.

“It was a pet project.”Winn said distractedly, his eyes on Felicity now as he said one word.“How?”

Felicity grinned.“I’m just that good.”

“Well your pet project just got better!”Lena quickly grabbed an earpiece, fiddling with the circuitry inside and then grinned in triumph.“They’ll bounce off of each other.So now, if any one person is within 500 feet of cabling and then someone else in within 500 feet of them and so on and so forth, we will keep our comms open.”

The trio grinned at each other and said in unison, “yay science.”

“Well, while the geek squad works,” Oliver said, turning back to Alex.“with communications open for us, I think the Spaceship is our only play.We confront Brainiac with all we have; force him to call off his demon in the sky.”

“Deal.”

“No deal.”Clark said, his hand landing on Alex’s shoulder.“This is way to danger—Ow!!!”

“Yeah, any other opinions you wanna share big guy?”Alex asked, Clark’s half torn ear clutched in her fingers.

He shook his head with a whimper and she released him.

They would need to split up.Ni and Eliza had already taken Bones and set up shop in a nearby hospital.They would be handling all incoming triage patients and Ni was coordinating with her allies around the globe to set up similar shops.Humans would find help wherever they went; aliens and meta’s would have a harder time.Felicity had already called her Palmer tech properties to tell them to allow Ni’s friends access and Lena had followed suit shortly after.Humans and Aliens would be working together to fight the invaders it made sense that they would work together to heal their own as well.

Meanwhile, Cat asked M’gann to get her to the President.“I can’t afford for those idiots in Washington to use their own minds so I’ll need to momentarily lend them mine.”

They were gone quickly after that little speech and Alex was both relieved and saddened to see her go.

“Ok.”Alex said, turning back to the rest of the team, the Sirens looking at her like she had gifted them with gold.“New plan.Pick your teams; I choose the Titans. …Oh and Kate!…Oh and Vasquez! …Oh and absolutely anyone who isn’t from Star City!”

Astra glanced at her daughter and said nothing.

“Shouldn’t we say what the teams will be _doing_ and pick based off of that?”Vasquez asked, “instead of treating this like a game of pickup basketball?”

Kitai grinned and ducked her head at the obvious scolding.

Alex nodded her respect.“Ever the analyst my little friend… Fine.I’m on ship infiltration sooo.Team Kryptonian… Oliver?”

Oliver nodded.“And the Titans.”

“Hey!”Cisco said from where he was also eating waffles.

“And Cisco.”Oliver added.

“Me, Sara, Barry, Vasquez, and Lucy will be on evacuation duty.M’gann could you get us to those cities so we can start moving civilians out of the way?”Kate offered while M’gann voiced her agreeance.

“Eh.” Lucy said in denial.“I will be on Geeksquad protection duty.”

“I support that.” Oliver nodded his head in approval and Alex fought not to vomit at his overprotectiveness.Never mind that she had slipped Felicity a bag of grenades before they had started all of this.She at least had a chill factor.

Alex turned expectant eyes to J’onn who remained stoic for all of a minute before huffing.“I will assist the Sirens.We will try to bottleneck the attacks at the gates.”

“Shucks Pops!”Harley said as Selina leaned in to kiss J’onn’s cheek.“Red was in love at first sight.You know cause your green and all…”

At the other end of the room Renee looked on disgruntled.“You can’t just not pick your own team Hoss!We’re standing right here.”

Oliver closed his eyes, searching for a patience Alex didn’t have, her next words spoken almost with glee.“You were assigned ground crew already.Raven, help them get to Yemen?”

“Wait, what?”Renee’s words were cut off as he, Curtis and Dinah were swallowed by the black portal.

“I sent them to Antarctica.”Raven said.“I figured they’d be more useful defending that gate.”

Alex nodded, impressed.“Wise… did you let them get coats?”

Raven blinked slowly, her expression not changing but Alex had the feeling she had done _something._ “Of course.”

“Warm coats?”

Another slow blink and a nod.“Obviously.”

Alex rubbed her hands together.“All right then.We better get ready; there’s a party and we’re all invited.”

Vasquez shook her head.“Please no one let her talk anymore.”

“Agreed.”Astra said.

Alex flipped them both off.

~*~

The New Plan was now underway, J’onn and Astra had flown around the ship, drawing the fire of the security system while Raven had teleported the rest of their team on board.

The inside of the ship was covered in a gleaming silvery black metal, similar to what Kitai’s sword was made of.Except this metal was _moving,_ almost shifting in an embryonic sort of way.Like liquid.

There were cases of what appeared to be alien artifacts along the sides of the ship and tubing that stretched all around and connected to a large green man in a purple spacesuit sitting on a dais in the middle of the room, a yellow crystal floating next to him.

Brainiac was waiting for them.

J’onn phased himself and Astra through the ship, an alarming ‘boom’ sound echoing where they had entered, before quickly phasing himself back out to assist the Sirens.

“Well,” Brainiac said.“Isn’t this quaint.”

“I don’t know why you have a hard on for our planet, but I’m going to need you to leave.Now.”Alex had her colt 9mm SMG pointed directly at the evil green man’s head.Her tac vest felt heavy on her body and she wished she’d had more time to rest before this confrontation but it was too late to make wishes now.Just had to work with what she had.

And right now, she had a big gun.

Brainiac had a big ship.

Odds were not in her favor.

“Misses Agent Ma’am,” Starfire murmured through her fake smile. “Maybe we shouldn’t threaten the big angry alien inside of his own ship?”

Alex scoffed.“I didn’t threaten him!”

Brainiac’s lips twitched in amusement.“I’m afraid I can’t do that Agent Danvers.My plans require your planets resources… and people.As to why I chose Earth, it’s simple.Because I could.Your people are so easily manipulated agent, just show them something shiny and they leap at it.Like children.Your race doesn’t deserve to rule itself.”

“Careful off-worlder.”Astra bared her teeth, Kitai next to her with her hand on the pommel of her sword.“That sort of mentality has led many a good General to their deaths.”

“Hardly.”Brainiac rose from his chair, the tubes rising with him and making a soft hissing sound at the change in elevation.“This is not a case of me needing a dose of hubris madame, I assure you.This is me uniting all of your castaways to a common cause: hate.And oh have your peers given me so much ammunition.”

“So you have them tear each other apart and then what?”Oliver snarled, his bow string pulled back to his ear.“You take over what’s left?”

“No.That will be for the Galactoid to finish off.My only wish is for you, all of you, to suffer.”The green man shook his head as if annoyed at school children.“My people see everything.We see all possibilities and all causalities… your kind… you humans have no possibilities.They all end in death, all of them.All fueled by your greed, and your anger, and your hypocrisy!”His tone elevated with his speech, agitation clearer the more he talked.Alex took the opportunity for what was sure to be a monologue to take in more about the room, counting steps and possible barriers as she went.“Why should I allow such a plague to exist?We are meant to be heroes are we not?To aid others?This is what they tell us is the ultimate goal of life?Yet, you would have me allow you to live—to thrive at the expense of nearly every other species? And you—” He turned to glare at the Kryptonians and scoffed.“You have aligned yourselves with them.I wish I could say I was surprised but you did after all destroy your own planet.What’s one more?”

Astra’s eyes went flat and Alex was suddenly very happy she was not Brainiac.

“If we’re so useless,” Robin’s bow staff was clenched tightly in his hands and when he spoke, his words were pushed from a clenched jaw.“Why enslave us?That means you need us.”

Brainiac turned his back on them, a flick of his fingers creating a hologram in which several planets were displayed and glowing green.“Again, your ignorance is nothing more than pitiful.These are the richest planets in the universe, all with a vested interest in enslaving your kind.Workhorses, test subjects, blood bags, the possibilities for your _bodies_ is endless; your lives however… they were forfeit the moment you were born.”Soulless black eyes turned their focus to Alex and she took an involuntary step back.“I will take what I need from this planet, see the end of the human plague and leave the rest to my allies…Lillian Luthor and Amanda Waller implanted bombs in their subjects’ heads… no one batted an eye.Yet this—this is what makes you rise up in fury?”

“I was furious before.”Alex hissed.

“You were impotent.”

“You’re a turd bomb.”Beastboy muttered next to her.

“And you have worn away my patience.”Brainiac returned, snapping his fingers as pieces of his ship came to life.“I’d suggest you all make your peace.”

The ship pieces came together to form what looked like spiders, about the size of Alex’s head.They had sharp metal legs that were meant to pierce flesh and when one of them landed on Astra, Alex learned that they had teeth.And that they could pierce Kryptonian skin.

Astra didn’t even scream, merely flicked the spider robot away as if it had done nothing, her arm healing before Alex’s eyes.So Kryptonians were pretty badass.

Alex had benched Clark, at least until he recovered some, and so they were down one very powerful Kryptonian but…

Alex found she didn’t miss him so much as Kitai moved passed her, her blade soundless as she pulled it out of its sheath and started hacking the sentient robots with her superspeed in one smooth motion.

Clark would have been useless next to such mastery.

She allowed herself one second of awe before firing her own weapon into the horde.As good as Kitai was she couldn’t take them all on.Astra closed in on Brainiac and Alex used everyone’s support to take stock of their situation.

Brainiac’s ship was clearly alive, the ground below her feet randomly pitching and groaning as if trying to throw them off balance.It worked quite well against the Titans at first but then Raven and Starfire took to flying, while Beastboy turned himself into a pterodactyl.

Cyborg melded his feet to the ship and Robin lived up to his days as an acrobat quite nicely.She was glad she had chosen her team so well.

The bots attacked each member of the party without bias, so Brainiac wasn’t out to get any one person, just destroy all of them.But some of the bots hung back, their small bodies crowding around the dais as if they were keeping watch.

Bingo.

Bad Guys always make mistakes.

On the dais was that yellow crystal, if the robots were protecting it that meant it was important and if it was important than Alex needed to get it.

Alex wished she had brought the sirens but she had assigned their team and Kate to help with evacuations and crowd control and fighting the alien horde.

Barry and Batman had also gone to each gate to try to fight off as many alien combatants as possible.

So, working with what she had.

An archer.

A weird tech with super powers.

Two very skilled Kryptonians.

And a group of super powered teens.

She could work with that.

 

~*~

M’gann had just finished dropping Sara into a crowd of Klingon’s when she heard her alarms ring.Her alarms being the very old and outdated fire bell that had come preinstalled in her bar.

Sometimes superhearing had its perks.

She sped off towards her home, the tight leather of her uniform protecting her from the elements as she made it back to National City in record time.

The city was literally on fire.

And right smack in the middle of it was her bar, the words “Go Home Freaks!” splattered in red paint across the brick walls.

Mon-El stood outside of it, watching everything they had worked for go up in flames.Next to him were a few of their regulars, all watching their safe place burn to the ground.

“They threw those bottle bombs you told me about.”Mon-El whispered, brown eyes reflecting the flames in front of him.“The cocktail thingies…There were a lot of them and you told me not to hurt humans anymore so… wood burns… really fast.”

M’gann glared at the inferno, taking in a deep breath and blowing out frigid air to quell the flames.

Mon-El watched dispassionately as the flames fought back, an actual body forming and howling at M’gann’s futile efforts.

“They had an Infernian with them boss.”One of her workers, Millie, came over looking the picture of desolate.“We couldn’t put it out.Mon-El burned his hands pretty bad.”

Dropping her glance to the Daxamites hands showed third degree burns on the man’s hands.Not that you’d be able to see he was injured any other way.All of Mon-El’s pain was for the home he’d just lost.

“This isn’t Daxam,” M’gann scolded, whacking Mon-El upside his head.“You still have a chance to save Earth.All of you do.”She turned her glare on the rest of her friends, watching as their faces morphed between fear, shame, and anger.

“You want us to save the humans?”

“I want you to do what’s right!I _want_ you to do what you wished could have been done for you!”One by one their eyes dropped away from her stern gaze and she eventually softened.“We can only rebuild the bar if there’s a planet to rebuild the bar on.I’m going to go fight for my new home.You all do what you need to.”

And, with one more glance at her destroyed livelihood and the vile words of hatred stained into her walls, she took off.

There were, after all, a myriad of ALFA allies on who she could release her rage.

~*~

Ok.The new plan was _not working._

Alex dodged out of the way of one of the crablike robots that Brainiac was sending out against them.She rolled behind one console and leaned far back as fire erupted from the metal tail.

Not cool.

They had to get that damn belt away from Brainiac, so she could knee him in the balls and be happy again.

Also, maybe getting his plans on world domination wouldn’t hurt either.

Oliver shot a trick arrow at Brainiac, allowing Astra to come in low and kick his legs from under him.Kitai’s sword a silvery black blur as she kept the ship from interfering in the fight.

Not that Brainiac needed the help.He kicked Astra in the head and flung her body back at Oliver who was forced to catch her or move out of the way.

Oliver being the gentleman he was, opted to catch the Kryptonian, giving Brainiac ample time to use his heat vision against them now.

It was a clusterfuck.

And the Titans were barely any use.Only Raven and Starfire would be getting an invite to her birthday party.The rest of them _sucked._

Who had even invited them?

_Especially_ Beastboy.The kid was too busy running to even employ any type of offense.

What had Robin been teaching—

Beastboy.

_Beast_ boy.

She was a moron.

“Beastboy!”The green kid yelped and then squawked as he turned into some sort of bird before turning into a walrus and squishing the robot beneath him.Not extremely effective but it would do in a pinch.“Didn’t you say you could do amoeba?”

“What?”

“She said amoeba!” Raven hissed as she teleported them out of the way of a killer bot, her portal opening on the other side of the room and close to Brainiac.

“Beastboy.”Alex said carefully, gripping his shoulders and keeping her eyes out for any incoming danger.“I need that belt.I need you to—"

“Oh!Right!”The boy looked extremely excited before disappearing from her vision completely.

Well that’s that.

Now to get that stupid glass jar.

She looked up at Starfire and pointed at the dais.

“Star!I need a lift!”The Tamaranian, dove towards her, grabbing her hand and swinging her in a wife arc over the sea of bots.

Seeing what she was doing, Robin and Cyborg did some weird twister like dance that had Robin sending out a few freeze discs that exploded with Cyborg’s canon.

“Booyah!”The black teen exclaimed pumping his fist.

The result was a row of disoriented and frozen robots that were unable to stop Alex from reaching the dais and the crystal it contained.

After she was on the dais however, all of their evil tiny little robot eyes turned to her.

Well…

She was probably fucked.

In the next moment, several things happened.

Cisco tried to open a portal for Alex to jump through but Brainiac saw, turned the hull of his ship into a sharp blade and blasted Cisco back onto it.

The young hero could nothing but wrap his hands around the shard holding him up.

“Oh god.”He muttered, his hands and torso becoming slick with blood.“Oh god, oh god, oh god.”

“Say all the prayers you want,” Brainiac hissed, his voice robotic and uncaring.“your gods cannot help you now.You are far from salvation.”

He moved to end Cisco but Astra and Kitai closed in, taking him on.It was then that Alex realized how much the ship was a part of Brainiac.Gross imitations of hands came from the walls of the ship, like something out of a scary movie, and started to pull Cisco back _into_ itself.

He screamed bloody murder, everyone trying to get to him to no avail.

Alex had just started to realize she had probably led them all to slaughter when an explosion rocked the ship, followed by a glowing yellow sword piercing the ceiling and then fucking Wonder Woman landing directly on Brainiac’s head.

_What the fuck?_

A large crack interrupted the image of Diana choking Brainiac out with her lasso and then Beastboy was suddenly standing in front of Brainiac as a gorilla, the belt held up in his fist in triumph.He had apparently understood Alex’s line of thinking and squished himself between Brainiac’s waist and his belt before transforming into something much larger and stronger.

Snap.

Someone needed to go on a diet.

Brainiac snarled, grabbing him by the back of the throat and slamming him down into the ground.

Repeatedly.

Unfortunately for him, Beastboy had managed to toss the belt to Robin at the last second and a quick and very interesting game of hot potato ensued.

Diana leapt off of Brainiac and pulled her lasso taut so that he was forced to let Beastboy go, the teen stumbling away.Raven swept him up in the dark mist of her cloak, taking Cisco as well and teleporting them to help.

It was enough of a distraction that Alex was able to get off the dais and back to the main floor without incident.

“Felicity.”She said as she tapped her ear, stuffing the crystal into the bottom of her bra.“Please tell me you have a plan.”

_“I don’t come up with the plans!That’s way too much pressure!Oliver comes up with the plans.”_

“You’re so helpful.”

_“It’s the ship.”_ Winn said.“ _We’re trying to figure out how to shut it down but he’s drawing power from that ship.”_

“Awesome.”Alex scowled, looking around her for an option.Her eyes landed on the hatch.She was a moron.A complete idiot.“Felicity on the count of three I need you to open the main hatch on the ship.Can you do that?”

“ _Of course, I can do that!”Felicity said, sounding insulted.“… why am I doing that?”_

_“_ Don’t ask questions, just trust me.And get Clark!”Alex ordered, waving her arms for the belt.Cyborg tossed it her way and as she caught it she yelled “3!”

The hatch opened and sucked Alex out the back of the ship, her body pinwheeling as she fought to keep a hold of the treasure in her hands.

For a split second she thought she had heard Brainiac scream but then there was nothing but air, and her own heartbeat.

It took her another second to realize that she heard nothing but air and her own heartbeat.

She’d lost comms!

Fuck.

“Felicity!”She tried, finally getting control of her body and pointing her head down.“Felicity I need a miracle!Please tell me you can hear me!”

Alex so did not want to be a pancake!That would _suck!_

She had not thought this through.

Which sucked because she had been doing so well.Everyone had said so.Her mom had been proud of her dammit!

And now, she was going to die.Without even knowing if it would have any effect on the outcome of the world ending battle.

This all sucked.

Clark better not show up at her funeral!This may not be his fault, but she was going to blame him anyway.

The ground rose up to meet her and she squinted her eyes closed.Had she picked up speed?She felt like she had picked up speed.

Her body flipped without her accord, and she felt her feet land on something solid.The sound of something crunching below her forcing her eyes open.

Holy shit she was flying.

She glanced down, blonde hair whipping around her ankles, Kara’s back strong beneath her.But not stable.Her arms pinwheeled as she fought to keep her balance and she wound up in a squat, her free hand clutched tight in Kara’s t-shirt as the Kryptonian fought off the few bots that had followed her down.

“Hold on!”Kara yelled, before freefalling rapidly and sending Alex’s heart straight through her chest, the straps of the belt flapping wildly behind her.

The woman performed a steep dive before pulling up at the last second.Alex screamed in fear and then excitement, the adrenaline pumping through her system needing some sort of release.

Kara flipped over, her heat vision obliterating a bot but the move dislodging Alex who kicked out at another.The blow had no force behind it, but it served to push Alex back up and into Kara’s arms.Kara caught her and swung her back to her back, Alex once more riding the alien like she was a surfboard and whooping like it was a rollercoaster.

Eventually there were no more bots left for Kara to fight and she banked to the side as she landed on the top of L-Corp.

Ironically—re: not ironic at all—it was the only building not in dire straits.

Lex Luthor had obviously worked his building’s safety into whatever deal he had signed with ALFA.

Fucker.

Alex didn’t focus on that right now, too wired with adrenaline and her love for Kara.“Dude!Did you see that?You saved my life Kara!”

“Pretty sure you saved mine first.”Kara pushed hair out of her eyes, fixing the grey MIT hoodie that Alex had gifted her before her departure.

Alex was more impressed.And probably in shock.“You _caught_ me!You—Kara—holy _shit!”_

“Breathe.”Kara said with a nod, her eyes darting around the skies.“Focus on breathing.”

“Uh huh.”

Breathing was good.

“Incoming pulse wave Great Scion.”Artax crossed in front of them, voice careless in his delivery.

Alex blinked in shock as he passed, Kara squinting hard out of the window as she rested a hand on Alex’s chest.

Right.Breathing.She could do that.

Except that it was hard to do when Brainiac’s ship released some sort of pulse and Kara knocked her over, stepping in front of the wave and absorbing a lot of the blow.There was glass shattering around them as Kalasin and Jon came out to shield Alex with their tiny bodies.

Ok.That wasn’t ok.

What in the world were they _doing_ here?

“What the fuck Kara?You brought them back too?”Jon hauled Alex to her feet, Kalasin picking up the crystal she had dropped and handing it back to her.“They’re children.”

“I decided I was not going to be left behind.Not again.”Kara glanced at her daughter for a second before resuming her sentry.“Kalasin wanted to come and Lois is right behind you.”

Alex balked, her head snapping around to catch a glimpse of Lois.The brunette had a handheld video camera rolling and she was talking rapidly into a large phone.

Which meant that the damn geek squad had set her up and Alex was probably outvoted.

Fuckers.

“They’re children—”

“Kalasin can make her own decisions and Jon is not mine to order around.”

“She’s like five—”

“She’s four.”

“Worse.She _cannot_ make her own decision Kara.That’s my point.”

Kara finally pulled her eyes back to Alex, her expression flat.“Would you like to be the one to tell her that?You want to be her new version of CADMUS and tell her what she can and can’t do?”

Alex’s stomach dropped, and she couldn’t help but glancing down at Kalasin who was looking at her with a slightly betrayed expression, her thumb rubbing at her lip.The agent pinched her brow between her fingers, her lips pulled back in a grimace.“That isn’t fair.This isn’t black and white Kara, there can be a middle ground.”

Kara’s lips twitched, “I think that’s my line.”

The room shook and made Alex stumble, Jon catching her again as they watched something explode in the distance.

“What was that?”Lois said, darting over to them and rubbing Jon’s back.

“A plane.”Kara said, her face pinched in thought as she regarded Kalasin with something like worry.“They are falling.”

“What do you mean falling?”Alex asked, although the question turned out to be unnecessary as more planes and helicopters started to fall around them.

Lois cursed, and Jon tensed, his small body ready to launch itself into the air.“I need to go help them mom.”

“Felicity,” Lois said, talking back into the phone.“Can you give them any backup?”

Alex didn’t even hear what her best friend said but she knew the answer would be a yes and her chest tightened with worry.

“You’re joking right?! Lois— _Kara_ —they are—”

“They know what we are Alex.”Jon cut her off, her eyes flashing with agitation.“But they also know that they can’t wrap us in blankets and hide us away somewhere safe.”He threw his arm out, gesturing to the devastation taking place outside the windows.“There is no place safe anymore.We either fight to protect our world, or we’re not going to have one.”

Next to him Kalasin glared at her, her expression more adorable than menacing.

Alex swallowed. Hard.

Well shit.

“You need to help them too,” Lois was saying.“They’ll need everyone to land those planes safely.”

Kara frowned, turning her head back to the skies.“I don’t know… Those are not my…”She bit her lip, unsure of herself in a way Alex had never seen before.Kara had spent the entirety of the life she remembered bowing to the commands of others.Being free must be its own form of torture.

“You don’t have orders anymore Kara.”Alex said, a sense of resignation coming over her.“You can make your own choices now and… people are dying.You chose me, you can choose them too.”Alex licked her lips.“If that’s what you want, then you should go after it.”She looked at the children before her, her heart aching at the loss of innocence CADMUS and ALFA had forced upon them.“All of you.”

Jon hugged her again.“I’m gonna throw you the best birthday party ever!”

Alex chuckled wetly and pressed a kiss to the top of his head.

Kara looked at her for a long moment, trying to find something in Alex’s expression.Eventually she nodded.

“Artax.”She ordered, her robot coming on command and bobbing in front of them. “Go back to Sanctuary, go through all of the archives, our weapons, see if we have anything that might help us here.”

“This seems a hopeless cause Great Scion but I shall get it done.”The little bot bowed, blasted a stream of bubbles on Alex’s boot and took off out the window.

Kara’s mouth pinched, something like amusement in her eyes as she took in Alex’s shoe before tilting her head at Jon and Kalasin and they took off out the window.

“That sucked.”Alex said to Lois, her hand rubbing at her chest.“How did you accomplish that?”

“I had practice.”Lois admitted, her hand patting Alex’s shoulder.“Come on, Winn said that crystal in your hand is Kryptonian which means you have a crystal you need to read.Felicity is sending your escort.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that's the midway.
> 
> Yes, they were all big douches to Kara but like I said, she's a legit stranger to them. It's awkward. Give it some time.
> 
> Felicity is my gem. I love her so. So of course I have Oliver and Alex the two overprotective psycho's that they are find new and interesting ways to keep her safe. Oliver defends her weird points and Alex gives her bombs.
> 
> Totally normal.
> 
> I'd like to say that the meaning behind Kalasin's name is legit. Kara didn't really remember much by that point because the evil Stefano Lillian Luthor was onboard when she had Kalasin meaning mind manipulation had already been enacted. But the need to protect Kal-El, to raise him was so engrained in her that she named her kid after him. Kally and Kal. How sweet.
> 
> Hopefully that goodbye wasn't too heartwrenching especially since I brought them all back. And please don't think Lois is a bad mom, she isn't. She just recognized that hiding wasn't the best course of action not when she could be communicating for her team. Comms are down they need all the eyes and ears that they can get.
> 
> They need *everyone* that they can get. It's an al hands on deck situation; as Peter Parker said before he vanished into dust: "You can't be a friendly neighborhood spiderman if there is no neighborhood." 
> 
> Or something like that.
> 
> Backing up a bit. I mentioned in chapter before last that Katu was going to call "her friends". That includes all of the alien camp since Kara would have obviously been open with sharing that with her and all of the CADMUS operatives that were released. Meaning that small army of aliens and metas are all of the people who were alienated and tortured for human enjoyment. Irony.
> 
> Also Katu riding the wooly rhinoceros makes complete sense. Fight me.
> 
> Brainiac is a sicko, Cisco is not dead, Beastboy is concussed, and Wonder Woman was a nice surprise. She will not play a big part here. None of the big hitters will except Kara but please feel free to imagine all of the Robins and Batman fighting away somewhere far away. Damien included.
> 
> When I wrote the scene where Kara catches Alex, I imagined Jim from Treasure Planet riding his surf board thing in the canyons. In case anyone was wondering.
> 
> Artax did poop on Alex's shoe. Yes. She did not kill him because they were just bubbles and she's reformed.
> 
> Mostly.
> 
> This chapter was pretty tame being at the front end of the battle, we really only saw Cisco and BB get hurt I think... oh wait and Clark, poor guy, next chapter is … well let's just call a spade a spade. It's worse. Not so much gory since I'm not into that, but there will obviously be more injuries so be prepared.
> 
>  
> 
> After next chapter it's smooth sailing to the end so just hold on a little longer.
> 
> Thank you also for all of the comments I've been getting, here and my other fics. If I haven't responded, know that I will once I kick this Medusa Virus that is trying to end me.
> 
> Peace, love and hairgrease.
> 
> ~Chronicles


	23. Make It Go Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ok, last chapter I was sick and didn't leave one of these. My bad.
> 
> Post Reunion, the US govt sends up the airforce to investigate the clouds. They just legit never come back down. Demons at play.
> 
> Lex is hired to advise the Pres btw. Super smart move said no one ever.
> 
> Kara tells the resistance what she knows about Braniac and Co. They all pool their knowledge together and discover that Brainiac is going to deliver his army to earth via Stargates to create a new Slaver Colony of humans. Pretty Shitty thing to do.
> 
> Alex sends Kara, Kalasin, Jon and Lois to Sanctuary under duress. Kara tells Kal that Kally is named after him.
> 
> And then the final battle begins.
> 
> We break up into teams and Team Alex, (Oliver, Cisco, Kitai, Astra, and TT) go fight Braniac.
> 
> Cisco gets impaled; BB gets knocked around; Alex jumps out of ship and all for a belt and a crystal.
> 
> No worries, Kara catches Alex and gets her to safety but then she gets yelled at for letting the kids tag along.
> 
> Super emotional.
> 
> And now we're here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello all,
> 
> Short notes here: we have two chapters after this that are broken down from one ginormous chapter. There might be a slight hiatus in the form of week between now and the next chapter but that will largely depend on my productivity. Weekly editing has cut into my professional life so I need to rectify that before continuing here. We'll see.
> 
> Warnings for violence in this chapter and graphic depictions of torture at the very end. If I haven't responded to your comments I will, just give me a bit to catch up on life.
> 
> Last night's episode was comedic gold and that last part... wow. I have ideas for days!
> 
> Favor for me: Listen to this song sometime around when you read this chapter. Just for shits and giggles.
> 
> Song: Make It Go Away- Greg Laswell

** Make It Go Away **

 

Flying with M’gann was _not_ like flying with Kara.

For one, flying with M’gann took absolutely no attention on her part.No steep dives, or exploding objects, or beautiful longing gazes of love.

Just a clean straight flight.

9/10 would recommend.

She lost a point for not offering snacks.

Getting to the fortress of solitude was easy.Even getting in wasn’t that difficult.

Decoding what appeared to be years of Kryptonian and Martian blueprints was the most taxing thing Alex had ever done.Doing so with her current deadline was damn near impossible.

“ _Alex_ ,” Winn’s voice came through loud and clear on the comms.“ _The gates are open!We’re being inundated with aliens!We need to know how to shut these things down!_ ”

“ _I KNOW THAT YOU MORON!”_ She yelled back at him, fingers flying in front of her face as she tried to make sense of the symbols appearing in midair.“And where the hell is Felicity?!”

_“She thinks you’re mad at her so she’s talking to Oliver’s team instead.”_

“Damn right I’m mad at her!I almost _died!”_

_“You jumped out of a **spaceship**!What did you think was going to happen?”_

“Shut up Winn.You _are_ not invited to my birthday party!”

~*~

Brainiac was no longer on board his ship.It was following him around like a puppy but he was no longer on it; the pulse obviously being some sort of magnetic field he had to tie himself to the vehicle.

Kara could take him out.

Her training told her it was way too late for that now.

She could take him out and it would change nothing.

At this point it might just make things worse.

So instead she focused on catching planes.

There were _a lot._

So, she’d taken to tossing them higher and landing another; tossing them higher and landing another.

Jon and Kalasin moved more slowly, their strength and comfortability with their powers only allowing for them to work as a team at the moment.

Still, Kara thought they were doing well all things considered.

But then she heard screaming.

Well, everyone was screaming but this sounded beyond desperate.And when she locked in on the people doing the screaming she saw why.

There was a small carrier plane plummeting to earth, only a couple hundred feet away from its surface.She tossed the plane next to her up and sped after it, knowing in her gut that she would be too late.

And she was.

Mon-El was not.

He stood with his feet firmly planted on the Earth, a red unitard and blue cape wrapped around him and making him look like the hero he said he wasn’t.The plane he had caught and was gently setting down also helped.

“Mon-El?” She asked, genuinely surprised.“You said you didn’t save people.You’re not… what are you… what is this?”

The man looked down at his suit and back at her, his stance momentarily proud and reminding Kara of her people.“There was an alliance once, between Daxam and Krypton.”He nodded firmly, even though his eyes looked unsure.“I am here to honor that alliance.”

Kara could do nothing but stare.

“That’s um from Lord of the Rings… Tolkien… Winn kind of…”Mon-El scratched at the back of his neck, cheeks colored red to hide his blush as the people he had just saved stumbled out of the plane behind them.“I realize that I let you down… There’s a lot about me that I wish I could change… I’d like to try now.”

“Sure.”She had to go, people still needed help.“Just… don’t die.”

He tipped his head.“I’ll do my best.”

~*~

On his screen Winn watched as the aliens flooded out of the gates.And he meant flooded.

“ _HQ_.”Superman called, pointing his body cam at a peak called Aconcagua.“ _Are you seeing this?”_

Winn hoped that Alex wasn’t _hearing_ it since she had very firmly told Clark to sit this one out.The Man of Steel had listened to her for all of fifteen minutes before flying off to do his own thing.He was still grossly injured, Winn guessing that since the clouds had effectively been cutting him off from sunlight _and_ he had gotten his ass handed to him by Kara _and_ he had nearly died from his injuries from the Galactoid, he was in much worse shape than his counterparts.He at least appeared to have acknowledged that fact and hadn’t tried to go up against Brainiac himself.

Seeing the situation at the gate though, Winn wasn’t sure he had picked the less dangerous option.

“We’re seeing it Superman.”Lena said, her voice shaking nearly as badly as her hands as she worked on something at her lab table.“Have you ever heard of a temporal freeze?”

_“Sounds pretty self-explanatory_.”Clark said. _“What’s your plan?”_

Lena held up a metal cannister that Clark couldn’t see.“L-Corp has a special division dedicated to time travel.It’s more of a nerd club but we did manage to make something that freezes time in a sort of dome 20 ft out for five minutes.Should help at least evacuate people to a more secure area.”

_“I’m on my way.”_

Above them the ceiling shook and then the room was on fire, Felicity screaming and slapping at Winn’s now aflame arm with her tablet.

He screeched himself, and looked around for the attack.An ugly alien that looked quite like a penis ran at him and he barely remembered hitting him.The movements that Alex had drilled into his skull, allowing his fist to make solid contact with the thing’s face.It collapsed in front of him and he huffed a breath of success.

“Celebrate now!”Felicity said.“Run later!”

“You said that in the wrong order!”Lucy grabbed his other arm, shoving Lena and the cannister along as she aimed a shot gun at the ALFA team swarming their makeshift warehouse.“In the back there’s a chopper, get to it now!”

Winn grabbed his tablet and laptop, grabbing Lena’s too at the last second as they ran for their lives.

Lucy kept most of them at bay with her gun, while Felicity blindly threw grenades around.

“Keep your eyes open if you’re going to throw those things!”

Felicity screamed and threw another grenade, this one knocking down a piece of scaffolding and collapsing the entrance some of the group was using to get in.

Winn slid into the helicopter seconds after Felicity, Lena grabbing the front seat as Superman crashed through the skylights.Lucy stayed on the ground, trying to keep the flood of aliens at bay while they got the engine started but obviously outnumbered.Felicity threw another grenade as Lena flicked switches and pulled a headset over her head.The blonde hacker had just reached for her last grenade when one of the aliens shot a talon at her that lodged itself in her thigh.She screamed and dropped the grenade, Winn watching in shock as it rolled out of the helicopter to land at Lucy’s feet.

He yelled a warning, simultaneously pulling Felicity away from the opening.

Lucy glanced up and then down as the grenade touched her foot, her body spinning before her brain had even processed the danger.She hurled herself into the chopper, the aliens below her tearing at her legs as Lena pulled them up, up, up.

An explosion rocked the helicopter… or the aftereffects of an explosion.Superman had seen their plight and not only gotten the aliens off of Lucy but also crushed the grenade in his fist _and_ taken the time cannister.It bought them enough time to get airborne and away.

Breathless, he looked down at the now completely swarmed warehouse and realized how close he had come to dying.And how little he could focus on that at the moment.

Winn tore at his shirt, creating scrap bandages that he immediately started applying to Felicity’s leg.“What now?”

“We’re not out of this yet!”Lena yelled back, maneuvering the copter as low as she could in the event of another EMP blast.“Lucy?” She whispered, eyes trying to see if the other woman was ok while also keeping them out of a wall.Lucy nodded back tiredly, eyes pinched closed in anguish, and Winn started on the bloody skin of her calves next.

Felicity grabbed Lena’s shoulder, face pale and taut with pain.“We can use Sanctuary.Kara and co have vacated so we wouldn’t be imposing.We can set up shop there!”

Lena stared ahead for a moment before trying the comms.

“Artax?We need some help.”

~*~

One thing Kate could say was that she had never really wanted a pet.She loved animals to be sure and would coo and make kissy noises when a cute dog crossed her path like any normal person, but having an actual pet?She didn’t even like cleaning her own poop for her to clean someone else’s.

But man would having a hairy giant rhinoceros thing be epic.

Katu sat on the thing like it was a lazy boy supreme, her back pressed laterally along it’s spine and one leg propped on a bent knee.She was the picture of relaxation.Kate scowled at her, taking out the few stragglers that remained from their side of the gate.Katu had cleared most of Egypt’s main streets by the time she’d made it to the gates and so had decided Kate could ‘handle this on her own’. 

She reminded Kate of… well Kate.At least the Kate that would come out when Batman got on her nerves which was often.

She swiped her bow staff at a tusk faced alien, dragging his head down and kneeing him in the temple.He went out like a light and she was finally able to breathe.Next to her Vasquez checked her ammo and squinted into the distance.

Kate was loathed to think it but… that had actually been kind of—

A loud ‘boom’ exploded seconds before she was thrown from her feet, wind gusting out of the gate and blowing her further away.She jammed her hand into her utility belt, pulling out a small pickaxe that she thrust into the ground for stability.A quick glance to her side saw Agent Vasquez holding onto a metal light post, a blink and the woman was gone, leaping out of the way of a street sign as it barreled down the street.

And then there were aliens.

Not a few aliens, or a lot, or a horde… this was a galaxy’s worth.

The wind stopped and Kate stood next to an untouched alien rhinoceros in front of what she now knew to be Earth’s annihilation.

There was no way they were getting out of this.

“Shit.”Vasquez muttered as she ran up next to Kate, “did you sign on for this?”

Kate wanted to say _no,_ that this had not been in the manual but…

Duty. Honor. Country.

She still believed in that, even after the debacle that had ended her military career.

Squaring her shoulders, she pulled four batarangs out of her belt and fit her body into a fighter’s pose.“I did; did you?”

Vasquez winced but aimed her gun at the oncoming army.“Unfortunately.”

Three against one.Not great odds.

Kate swallowed and forced herself not to think of Maggie.

“Well _I_ didn’t.”Katu said from above them, sliding down her behemoth friend and rolling her neck.“I barely got any shut eye up there.You couldn’t keep them busy for like 5 minutes?”

Fighting a growl, Kate kept her focus on the enemy.“So sorry your majesty, I’ll try harder next time.”

“I know that was sarcasm.”Katu glared and then broke and grinned at Kate like they were old friends.“I’ll allow it.Excuse me.”

Kate ignored her, flinging her batarangs into the crowd and watching as they exploded, taking out much of the front row.It had been a bad idea.

“You made it angry!”Vasquez shouted over the rise of angry screams and battle cries, her gun loud next to Kate’s ears.

The aliens charged and it was all Kate could do to keep flinging batarangs and bombs at them.

When they were five feet out she sent up a silent prayer, her left finger rubbing over the star of David tattoo on her purlicue.

_Dammit._

Then they suddenly stopped, one by one their bodies doing a rough imitation of a puppet being suddenly held still by their master.

“Whoa.”Vasquez whispered her eyes on something behind Kate’s shoulder.

On Katu behind Kate’s shoulder.

Batwoman spun and saw Katu with a pained expression, blood dripping from her nose and ears and a low growl growing in her chest.The other woman’s hands were held out at her sides as if she was trying to squeeze a giant invisible ball.The sound of a gun pulled her back to where one of the aliens had apparently slipped free of… Katu’s hold?

What in the…

Vasquez shot another alien who broke free and then Katu’s growl turned into an outright roar and she slammed her hands closed, the aliens dropping like their strings had been cut as they all collapsed on the floor.

Dead.

Kate was pretty sure they were dead.

“Sleeping.”Katu panted from her new position on the floor, the front of her clothes a mess of her own blood.She swatted Vasquez’s hands away when the Agent would have helped her up and blinked unseeing eyes up at the sky.“You’ve got maybe 4 hours before they wake up so you know… don’t screw it up.”The rhinoceros stepped closer, and Katu dug a hand into its fur.And was pulled up by said fur to her original position on it’s back.“I need to take a nap now.Don’t wake me up please.”

The rhinoceros lumbered away and Kate stared after them for a long moment.

Vasquez was polite enough to close her mouth for her.“As shocking as that is, I don’t want to waste her sacrifice.”

Kate blinked, “sacrifice?”

“That was a large energy demand for _anybody_ and Katu is still human.”Vasquez shrugged as she started slapping DEO cuffs on the first alien she came across.“I’m not saying it was fatal but I definitely hope she’s going to find a doctor.”

Kate frowned after the spec that had become Katu and her Rhinoceros.“She wouldn’t trust a doctor.”

“No,” Vasquez agreed, cuffs clinking again.“She wouldn’t.”

~*~

“The gates are powered by a crystal just like Astra said.”Alex read off, her hands turning the crystal in her possession this way and that.“We need to turn it counter clockwise 4 degrees, back 30 degrees, and then a 90-degree counter clockwise rotation.Like a combination lock.”

A beat of silence, Alex awaiting M’gann’s response from her position in the Andes.

_“That didn’t work.”_ The Martian said.

“ _Over here either_.” That was Curtis Holt, his team still in Antarctica and probably at severe risk of hypothermia.“ _Are you sure you’re reading that right?_ ”

Alex scowled.“You try decoding an ancient language you never knew with one you are very rusty at in the middle of a world take over while listening to your friends get attacked and see how far you get!”

_“… I’m good thanks_.”

“She is not reading it correctly at all.”Kelex buzzed around behind her and she swatted at him.“I have tried helping but—”

“Shut _up_ Kelex!You’re translating Ancient Martian into Ancient Kryptonian!That is not helping.Translating it all into English would be you helping!”

“I’m sorry I am unable to process that request.”

“ _I know!_ You’ve said that about a million times now!”

_“We’re just going to leave you guys alone now.”_ Curtis said, obviously handing over the comm to someone else.

“Fucker.”Alex muttered.

“Language Agent Danvers.”

The unexpected interruption nearly gave her a damn heart attack, her hand going to her gun as she turned around slowly.

Siobhan stood behind her, clothed the same way she had been the night they had attacked Cat Grant.Her face was clean and she was dressed head to toe in black.

“Hello Alex.”

“Siobhan… you look terrible.”Siobhan’s lips twitched, but she didn’t move.“I thought you were dead.Hoped for it really.”

“I don’t blame you.”The Banshee nodded, glancing down for a moment before looking back up.“They sent me here to kill you.”

Her gun felt heavy in her hand as she pulled it up to her chest.“Hope you came prepared for a fight.”

“I said they sent me.”The brunette held out her hand, a crushed collar in her fingers.“Not that I was going to obey.”

Alex peaked over at the metal, slightly impressed but mostly suspicious.“You pulled off your collar?Those things are vibranium.Impossible.”

“For me maybe but I know a guy.You didn’t get everyone when you swept CADMUS.The rest of us decided dying might be a better option than being puppets for the rest of our lives.”Siobhan’s lips pursed and she looked genuinely regretful as she continued.“I hurt a…. mutual friend of ours.There are two people she loves in this world, her kid and you.She has her kid’s back I thought it only fair that I have yours.”

“I’m taken.”

“Hilarious.”

_“Alex?Everything alright over there?”_

Alex pressed her mic.“Siobhan is here.She says she’s here to help.”

_“Yo!Shoot her Hoss!She tried to kill you!”_

Alex lowered her gun, turning her back on the woman and resuming her previous activity. “You don’t happen to know Martian, do you?”

“Just like that?”Siobhan asked, sounding mildly surprised.“You’re going to trust me just like that?”

“Well, Kara didn’t kill you so you’re probably not evil and Renee said I should shoot you and I’d rather lick Max Lord’s foot than listen to anything he says so … yeah.We’re good.Martian?”

Siobhan shook her head.

“Useless.”

~*~

Kara banked sharply to the side, pulling up short at the voices she had just heard.

She wasn’t a stalker.

She wasn’t.

But she had thought keeping an ear out for Alex would be a good idea.

Siobhan was with her now.

Fingers clenching, she checked the skies.All of the aircraft that had been compromised were now landed, only the first plane being a casualty.Kalasin and Jon zoomed over to her, both of them looking exhausted and she hugged them both.

“ _Attention all super hearing people.We’re freezing time for a second at the major battle sites.Please help us evacuate.”_

That was Winn basically screaming at the top of his lungs and Kara rolled her eyes affectionately.Big nerd.She had missed him.

“Did you hear that?”Both children nodded and she pressed a quick kiss to Kalasin’s head.“Do you want to go help?”

Jon nodded, and Kalasin pulled away pointing first at herself before crossing her arms in an ‘x’ shape and dropping them to point at Kara.

“You saw that movie too?”Jon exclaimed, “it was so super awesome!Wakanda Forever!Yes! I’m pumped now.”

He started to speed off and Kara grabbed him by the back of his shirt.“Whoa buddy, slow down.Stay together.Stay _safe;_ be smart.Start along the coast and work your way in.If you get stuck, yell.I’ll be there. I promise.”

“Yes ma’am.”

Kara smiled and ruffled his hair.To her daughter, she stroked her cheek, and kissed her head again before copying the movement Kalasin had done. “I love you too Kally.I’ll see you when this is over ok?”

Her daughter nodded, squeezed her tight and took off with her cousin, both of them soon specks in the distance.

Kara turned her attention to Alex, and sped over a frozen tundra to confront her former team mate.

She needn’t have bothered.Siobhan and Alex were hunched over a table bickering over a set of glyphs like children.

“It’s a ‘y’.”Kara said stepping between them and squinting at the runes.“It’s saying to ‘destroy’ something.That or ‘hungry’, the words were written very similar back then and it’s hard to tell the difference from this one word.”

Both women froze and Kara realized that there had also been background chatter coming from Alex’s earpiece that was silenced by her words.

“You know Martian?”Siobhan asked, looking vaguely annoyed and affronted.

“Apparently.”Kara confirmed, pushing a few things around as she tried to decipher the message.“Don’t ask how though.I have no idea.”

Alex shoved uselessly at her shoulders.“No, no, no.We need the big guns out there fighting.The little people can handle this.”

Kara glanced at her, amused.“There is nothing little about you Alex.Besides, the ‘big guns’ aren’t going to last out there much longer.We’ll start falling behind if we can’t figure out how to send these people back where they came from. Have you figured that part out yet?”

“Kind of.”Alex sighed in resignation, pulling up a notebook that she had been scribbling in.“There’s a rotation you can do that will allegedly pull anything that came out of the gates back to where they came from but as long as the gates have power they’ll just be able to come right back in.We need to run the combination, turn off the gates, and _then_ cut off Brainiac’s dick.”

“What is it with you and dicks?”Siobhan asked.

“What is it with you and being a bitch?”

“Genetics.”

“Lesbian.”

The women nodded at each other and Kara rolled her eyes, picking up the crystal from the console in front of her.“We can’t stay here, it’s about to be overrun.Siobhan there are robots incoming, can you go kill them please?Buy us some time?”

The Banshee huffed but turned to go take on the newcomers.

“Where are we going?”

“CatCo.”Kara said, wrapping her arms around Alex and taking off once again.“There’s no one there yet and it’s been abandoned.”

Alex nodded, and tucked her face under her neck.

When they returned to National City, they returned to a warzone.People were screaming and dying in the streets and Kara flew passed all of them to get to CatCo.It wouldn’t matter if she saved a few people on the streets if Brainiac won.The logic did little to appease the feelings of guilt and shame that warred in her belly.

They were in Cat’s old office in a matter of minutes, and Alex immediately ran to Winn’s old desk and pulled out a tablet.

“I’ll keep working on this half.You figure out the power situation.”

Kara watched her for a moment, simultaneously feeling bereft, hurt, exasperated, and so very in love.

Looking down at the crystal in her hand she steeled herself.She couldn’t love Alex is she allowed Earth to be overrun.

Simple things first.

Translation.

“Wait!”Alex pushed the crystal down between their bodies, eyes suddenly focused completely on Kara.“My dad—Jeremiah Danvers… I need to know if you knew him.While you were at CADMUS.”

Puzzled, Kara tilted her head, trying to remember anyone who might have worn that name tag.“Your dad?Alex why would I—”

“The guy you painted.”Alex interrupted impatiently, “for my mom remember?The man in the painting did you ever see him while you were at CADMUS?Was he one of the people who worked on you?”

Kara shifted, suddenly uncomfortable and anxious, something in her head trying to hide at Alex’s questions. “I don’t… I know all the doctors who… worked on me but none of the them had that name.Not that I remember.”

Alex pulled out her phone, swiped the screen a few times and then held it out for Kara to see.

“This man.Did he ever hurt you?”

The idea was laughable and Kara did just that.This at least she could answer.“Superman?”

“Superman?”Alex pulled the phone back, checked the photo and shook her head. “No, that’s—”

“I know, I just… that’s the only thing I knew to call him.He never told me his name.”

Alex’s face went weird, and her heart beat overtime at the simple admission.“So you made one up?”

Kara shrugged, self-conscious in the face of Alex’s judgement.“It’s something… it helps me not be scared.”

“Yeah.”Alex nodded, voice hoarse.“We did that when we were kids.I told you that if you give someone a silly enough name, it would be more funny then scary.”

Biting her lip, Kara shifted her weight.She didn’t _remember_ what Alex was telling her.“I guess it stuck huh?”

The other woman looked _so lost._

Alex cleared her throat, swiping a hand under her nose and taking a step back.“So Superman… did he hurt you?”

“No, of course not.He’d sneak me food sometimes…”Kara bit her lip wondering why her head was such a mess.Why she couldn’t give Alex more of an answer into the man who was her father and Kara’s sometimes savior.“He got in a lot of trouble because he wouldn’t work on us himself but I’m pretty sure they made him do some research behind the glass…”Alex looked dissatisfied and Kara picked her brain for something— _anything_ that she could remember about Dr. Danvers.“Sometimes when it got really bad he’d come to my cell and shine this weird flashlight on me.He never said anything but it always made me feel better.”She pulled the phone closer, the image showing the kind man strapped to a chair in a room by himself.“Why is he tied up?”

“Precaution.”Alex said, pulling her phone away.Her voice sounded off though and Kara cupped her neck.

“He was kind to me.I don’t know exactly what they had him doing but I know that he was kind to me when it would have gotten him in a lot of trouble.”She made sure her voice was even, that Alex would listen because… because Kara knew what it was to lose everything, and she didn’t want Alex to ever lose _anything._ Especially not her father.

Besides everything she was saying was the truth.

No more lies.

The red head raised trembling fingers to her hand, squeezing gently before pulling Kara’s hand off her.

“We need to figure this out.Let me know when you’ve got something solid.”

She crossed to the other side of the room and Kara let her.

Simple things first.

She could work on the love thing when this was all over.

~*~

Astra flew as fast as she could with the man in her arms, trying both to get him to the nearest aid and get back to help the Martian and the children at the same time.

She wasn’t prone to such frivolities as worry, but she did understand that time was of the essence, both for the man code-named Green Arrow and for J’onn J’onnz who she had left alone with children.

Admittedly skilled children but children none the less.

Their new mission, a mission she had understood almost as soon as the Brave One had allowed herself to be sucked into the sky, was to keep the Brainiac occupied.Astra could not do that if she was busy saving lives and the sorceress was currently busy holding a forcefield around the alien while her team took a much-needed respite.

It could have come a little sooner.

It was Astra’s opinion that if Raven had set up the force field more quickly than Brainiac would not have thrown her daughter from the ship; would not have sent Astra into a rage.

J’onn J’onzz had been called in to fill in Kitai’s vacant position but even so…

She had learned as a young child not to lose her focus, but her fear for her daughter…

She had missed, her heat vision ricocheting harmlessly off the hull of the ship and slicing Oliver Queen’s arm off below the elbow.

He had passed out almost immediately and she had just as soon picked him up and raced off to the hospital they had set up in National City.

She landed in front of the building and called for help, laying him on a gurney and keeping his face covered.

“I need Eliza Danvers.Immediately.”

“She’s working on an alien ma’am.I called in Dr. Torres.”

The doctor who they called over took one look at the man in green and nodded.“I need a drape for his face.”She said to her colleagues.To Astra, she said, “don’t worry.Your friend is in good hands.We’ll do everything we can to help him.”

Astra clenched her jaw but nodded, moving away from the man she had hurt and launching herself into the sky.

She had wanted to stay; to begin making amends for her dishonorable act but she had a Martian to aid as well.

J’onn J’onnz would not fall because of her.

Bullets grazed her unitard, the custom Kryptonian armor taking the blows like they were mere nuisances rather than life threatening in nature.Astra glared at the group of Army men who were shooting at her, and diligently turned to them to show them an American Flag that Alex had forced her to patch to her chest.

The bullets stopped.

Not that Astra cared much, her attention was now on a much larger bullet strapped to a green truck of some sort.That looked very useful.

~*~

Mon-El remembers Daxam.He remembers his people and the crimes he had committed against them.Remembers that even so he had loved his life on the planet as the next and only heir.

He remembers that despite his sins, he would have made his parents proud.

He hates that he misses it; that he misses his parents.

Hates that there is a part of him that would have rather been a King of Slaves than the sole survivor.

Rather be a tyrant than be alone.

Now, fighting a group of Klagmites—an odd species of alien with ridged foreheads that reminded him of the movie ‘Predator’—he was reminded very vividly of his last moments on his planet.

He wanted to be anywhere but here.

He wanted to hide under the bar and wait for it to all be over.

But he also didn’t want to be that guy anymore.

He was so sick of letting himself off the hook; of making it someone else’s problem.

Earth _was_ his problem now.

And so was M’gann and Alex and all of his friends at the alien bar.

Even Clark was his problem.

Mon-El liked having problems.It meant he wasn’t quite so alone.

And the fact that all of his problems could probably kick his ass meant that he could never again be a Tyrant.They wouldn’t let him.And not because he couldn’t police himself, although that had been true in the past.

No, now it was because he knew that there were other people out there who had problems like him; who had people and family and just wanted to protect them.Just wanted them to live.He had no right not to do everything in his considerable power to make sure their problems were just as protected as his own.

He was a prince.

Prince’s protected their people.

Plus, he knew if he didn’t that he’d lose his problems—knew he’d hurt them—if he ever went down that road.

So he wouldn’t.

Linda had been the one to show him that.

He ducked under a particularly powerful projectile of acidic spit, spinning another opponent into the way of another spit bomb and used his heat vision to take out the first attacker.

The last alien, the one he had in his hands, he simply tossed into the air and froze with his freeze breath.

He caught the block of ice before it could shatter and quickly turned to the group of civilians that had been hiding in a building.

They were meant to be directing all civilians towards the nearest police stations and bomb shelters so that’s what he did.Clearing a path for them and making sure they reached safety.

He’d seen the devastation Linda had left in the wake of her departure, even though it had clearly been beyond her control.Whether it was her fault or not, he didn’t ever want to have that effect on anyone.

Never wanted his actions to make his loved one’s cry or doubt his intentions.

He was a simple guy; he wanted to eat, play, and love.Love multiple people very vigorously, but love them all the same.

Now he just needed to figure out this hero thing and maybe he would be able to find a place in his new world.

Daxam was gone; he wasn’t about to lose Earth too.

He was pulled from his thoughts by a huge Gorilla landing in front of him and he immediately used his heat vision to distract the brute from the people following behind him.The Gorilla yelled and tried to slam his fist down to crush Mon-El but was suddenly stopped by a warrior woman dressed in black armor.The woman stabbed down at the large ape with something—a sword—and slid down his back, slicing him from his neck to his ass before landing in front of Mon-El.

Gorilla guy slammed down behind her.

“Hello everyone.”She said, “my name is Kitai, please continue to your nearest shelter.”

Her words sounded extremely rehearsed and Mon-El and his group simply stared at her.

She frowned and then looked down at her palm, mouthing words.

Because she had written her words on her hands.Mon-El face palmed.

“That building across the street,” he pointed a medium sized white concrete building.“You’ll be safe in there.”

Kitai continued to frown as the people listened to him, waiting until they were all safely tucked away before turning to him.“I said the same thing.”

“You said it like a robot.”

There were screams coming from about five miles away to the west and Mon-El took flight to track down the next group.

“I am not a robot.”Kitai insisted as she came up next to him.

“Then stop speaking like one.”

There was some grumbling from her, but she said no more as they came upon a group of Hellgrammites.

This was not going to be very fun.

He slid under a venomous stinger, his movements clumsy compared to Kitai who simply flipped over the projectile that was shot at her and sliced her opponents head from his body.He needed to add some cardio to his routine.He came up under the Hellgrammite and punched into where he thought the creature’s kidney might be.Wrong.

He was very wrong and he was flung back for his mistake.

Scratch that, he needed to come up with a routine.Did Daxamites have routines besides sex?

The Hellgrammite screamed at him, and it was then he realized that two children were trying to usher a group of civilians to safety.That looked an awful lot like—

“Kalasin El!Rao—Snagriff!”Kitai launched herself over a Hellgrammite, twisting in the air to avoid the claws and landing neatly next to her niece.Kalasin had her back to Jon’s, the boy slightly pale as he held a clearly broken arm to his chest and yelled at the crowd.The little girl was heat visioning anyone who came within a few feet of her, her anger clear even if she did look overly exhausted.

Quickly Mon-El did the math in his brain, watching as Kitai fought off two Hellgrammites from her left and Kalasin tried to take on another three.There were two more glaring at him.

Right.

Cape tricks.

He really hoped this worked.

~*~

Winn had never wished harder for another set of skills in his life.His thing was computers.That was his area of expertise.But the computers were down, most of them wiped out by an EMP.In their stead was a massive Kryptonian super computer that he, Felicity, and Lena were trying to reconfigure with Artax’s aid.

“We need to be able to bring the network back up.”Felicity was explaining to the bot, seated on a stool Artax had procured for her on her arrival.At least insofar as procured meant, ‘made to appear out of the floor’.“If we can bring basic systems back online than the military will be able to mobilize their teams in the air and water.Land teams will have a better time too.”

“We’ll need to patch the ship directly into one of your cables then.”Artax said as he pointed what appeared to be lasers out of needles at Lucy’s legs.Winn watched the worst of the bleeders knit themselves back together before his eyes.Felicity would be next in line, he didn’t care how much she didn’t like pointy things.

Felicity frowned thoughtfully before nodding.“Go to these coordinates,” she jotted something down and handed it to Artax.“It’s the main cable between the continents.I tried to reconfigure some stuff in high school when—never mind.Not important.”

“I’m actually curious.” Lena admitted with raised brows.

“I’ll tell you when we survive.”

“That’s just for internet though.”Winn argued.“We need the whole system back up.”

“That’d be great but some of those systems rely on satellites,” Lena argued back.

“Archaic.”Winn typed clumsily at the console in front of him.“That should switch all systems over to the internet.As long as the whole world doesn’t log on at once, it should be able to handle it.”

Felicity frowned skeptically.“If you break the internet I will be very mad at you.”

Artax zipped away and a second later Winn felt his stomach drop as they changed in elevation.They sunk rapidly and he found himself white knuckling the table in front of him.

He should have put on clean underwear.

He should have called his mom maybe.

No, she hadn’t called him.

Scratch that.

But he should have talked to Kara.Shouldn’t have let his fear and pride stop him from having last words with her.

He should have told her he wasn’t mad at her.

“Shut up Winn.”

Oh, he was talking out loud.

The ship screeched, hitting something and the whole ground shook.The lights flickered for a moment before shutting off completely.

Scratch that.

He should have called his _mom._

Another moment passed and he became aware of a constant buzzing in his pocket.

“Am I the only one getting emails right now?”Lena asked.

“Oh, is it an alien prince who wants to share his fortune with you but needs your bank account info to transfer the funds?”Felicity’s face became illuminated by a soft glow as she pulled out her own phone.

“Wait.”Winn said, his phone in his hand before the words were out his mouth.The data signal showing he had 4G signal strength… underwater… in a space ship.“Did that actually work?”

The lights came back on and Felicity dove over to him, strangling him with her arms.“You beautiful nerd.I am so in love with you right now!”

“General Lane.”Lena had her phone to her ear and spoke hurriedly.“We brought communications back up sir.Please tell the world governments to proceed with all operations.”

“Kind of wondering if we’re the heroes or the villains getting that asshole involved.”Felicity said as she released Winn from her death hold.

Winn shrugged, feeling suddenly very tired.“As long as the earth survives I’m good being either.”

Mentally he made a note to talk to Kara after all this was over.If he could survive this, he could survive their conversation.

He was also going to call his mom.

No way was he going to die with that on his head.

~*~

"I thought about it you know.I 've always wondered…"

Alex squinted, pulling her attention away from the tablet to stare at Kara."What?"

"My parents.I wondered why they put me in that pod.Why they saved me.Why Rao let me live."The blonde was staring at her hands, slowly clenching and unfurling her fists."It was never enough for me, the notion of love.It always seemed so… small."

"Kara…"

Alex took a step forward and Kara looked up, a small sad smile on her face.

"I get it now.Loving something so much that you're willing to risk everything on even the smallest chance that they'll live; that they'll survive.It's all come full circle."

Alex swallowed."What did the crystals say?"

Kara looked skyward, eyes taking in something that Alex couldn't see."The power from the gates is being generated by the satellites only because they're in a holding pattern.The original design called for a certain… outline… Like the tectonic plates.Brainiac has been moving the satellites to their correct positions for months, the comet was the last piece he needed to complete the shape.But Alex… If they were to shift, change direction…Alex… I have to go."

"No."

Another sad smile.

"I'm very sorry that I'm hurting you.I wouldn't leave if there were any other choice."

"That's bullshit!"Alex cried, feeling panic threaten to overwhelm her."You have a choice; you’ve always had a choice.You can stay here, we could get Astra or Kal or…"Kara was already shaking her head and Alex felt sick at her own words.Because this was a one-way trip; she was trying to send someone else off to die.

Kara stepped forward, hands coming up to cradle Alex's face."I'm the fastest.CADMUS trained me since I was a child to be the fastest.It has to be me.If we're going to get through the Galactoid it has to be me."

"Kara," Alex sobbed, grabbing onto the other woman's forearms for dear life."You can't come back from this; you'll die."

"Lightbulbs die my sweet."Kara said, thumbs stroking away the steady fall of tears from Alex's eyes.Alex who was barely holding on; who couldn't even appreciate that after all of this, Kara had actually made an accurate movie reference.All she could do was try to freeze this moment, memorize the way Kara's hair billowed behind her, how her lips were stretched into a sad smile, face the picture of acceptance.The way her hands felt on Alex's skin.And her eyes…

Blue, not brown.

There were galaxies in her eyes, as blue as Alex had remembered, more beautiful than she had dreamed.Her Kara.She couldn't breathe.

"I love you Alex."

"No!"Alex thrashed out of Kara's hold, face red in anger and spittle flying from her lips."You don't get to do that!You don't get to tell me that and then just—No!You cannot leave me again!Please do not leave me again.I am asking you to _please_ —God Kara, _please_ just choose me.Just this once!Please!"

Outside, explosions shook the building but neither woman paid them any mind.Smoke billowed in thick clouds and the structure they were in creaked under the onslaught of more devastating weaponry as ALFA's army advanced in the streets below them. The world was on fire, people were dying but if Alex was going to give them Kara—give them her heart—than she deserved 5 fucking minutes of complaining.Of pretending that she had a chance of fighting for the one person she'd tried so damned hard to save.

Kara spread her arms, hands out at her sides as she looked at Alex patiently."What would you have me do?"

"STAY!"Alex cried, fingers digging into her scalp and ripping out strands of her hair."I want you to stay."

"Ok," Kara conceded."Ok.I'll stay here with you."She paused licking her lips and taking a step closer to Alex, face open and kind."And ALFA will come, but I'll fly us away somewhere.I'll grab my daughter and you and we'll go.And we'll hide while our friends die.And then when they come for us, we'll die protecting Kalasin… and then they'll raise her to be a monster.They'll rape her, use her as a weapon, and eventually everything I've ever cared about will be gone.Is that what you're asking of me?"

Alex shook her head in denial throughout Kara's short speech even though she knew the words to be true. It would probably happen exactly as Kara had said.No matter what they would lose each other.She sobbed, her knees giving out from underneath her as reality started to sink in.

Kara dropped next to her, gathering her in her arms and pressing a kiss to the top of her head."I would do anything for you Alex.Anything.But I cannot do this.She's the only thing I've ever done good in my life.I need her to be safe.I need _you_ to be safe."She pulled the sobbing woman closer, Alex's hands clutching desperately at the fabric of her clothes, the MIT logo wrinkling in her grasp."I wish I had a hundred years."Kara murmured, brushing another kiss to Alex's brow."A hundred years that I could give to you."

Alex shook her head, her pain quieting as exhaustion overtook her."There has to be another way.Please Kara.I can't lose you again."

"Let me tell you what I wish I'd known," Kara started, a small smile blooming on her face."When I was young and dreamed of glory.You have no control, who lives, who dies, who tells your story." 

Alex sobbed and flipped the woman off.

Hamilton?

Now she wanted to learn about speaking in movie references?

Now?

Kara's smile grew and she pressed a small kiss to the corner of Alex's mouth."Oh, I can't wait to see you again… it's only a matter of time… Alex."She breathed, pressing her forehead to her human’s."How do you… Do you still…?"She made a frustrated sound as words failed her and looked helplessly back at Alex.

"Idiot!"She whimpered, voice shaking as she pulled Kara close by the neck and pressed a desperate kiss to her lips."I love you."

She poured everything she had into the kiss, trying to convey the depth of her love in the final contact.Desperate sobs had her pulling away, her lips swollen and chest burning as she shook her head in denial, words she never would have said clawing their way to the surface."I was supposed to save you."

The admission came out in a whisper, but between how close their faces remained together and Kara's super hearing, she knew the other woman had heard her.The smile that blossomed on the blonde's face confirmed her thoughts.

"But you did."She was pulled into another kiss, softer this time, but just as destructive.Kara pulled away first and nudged her nose against Alex's cheek."Take care of her for me… please."

She managed a shaky nod, before she felt Kara pull away and take her hand.

The Kryptonian wrapped their combined fingers around Alex’s ear and Alex fought a sob.“Overwatch, we have a plan.Kara’s going to need some backup.”

Felicity responded but Alex barely heard her, trying in vain to memorize Kara’s face.

“Tell them to reverse the gates in 7 minutes.”Kara requested, pushing a lock of hair behind Alex’s ear, eyes darting around the agent’s features.

Alex repeated the words, feeling like she was signing her own death sentence.

Her girl smiled, kissed her one last time, and lifted into the sky.

She wanted to keep her eyes closed; wanted to stay in their bubble just a little longer, but she couldn't let her go like that.

She forced her eyes opened and watched through a cloud of tears as her world flew into the sky, intent on saving earth and its many inhabitants.On saving her daughter.On saving Alex.

Then she's just gone.It's not dramatic, there's no ill-timed bomb that goes off; nothing moves in slow motion.It actually all feels very fast for Alex.She wishes it had slowed down; wishes she had been able to hold on just a little longer.

" _Danvers_."Lena's voice crackles over the coms and she forces her head back to their current situation.

She tries to force the tears from her voice as her fingers press on her vest to the button for her mike."Go for Danvers."

_“We’re live again, operations back on full.”_ Lena said in her ear. _"Lex is getting away, you're closest."_

Alex swallowed.Good.She had a lot of pent up anger right now.

"Give me his coordinates."She croaked.

~*~

" _Superman, Kara's gonna try to get passed the angry guy in the sky to take out the satellites.She needs backup."_

_ "I'm a little busy at the moment." _ The voice said, sounds of tearing metal and screams accompanying it.  _“Am I the only resource?”_

Kitai was looking around at the destruction around them before stopping and focusing her attention on him.Everyone else was previously engaged.They were the only ones available.

 "So what do you want to do Daxam?"

 Mon-El had been squinting down at the wound on his side, hand braced to try to stop the bleeding.They had just survived an attack from a group of aliens that looked like a cross between velociraptors and cats.Kitai had handled all of hers handily, but Mon-El had been a prince, not a warrior and had taken a nasty blow to the side.He was pretty sure he was not meant to see his own organs, his suit the only thing keeping him together at the moment.

They’d fought off the Hellgrammites just fine, Mon-El actually feeling useful for once but he’d taken a hit to his side from a stinger when he’d seen one of the aliens go for Jon’s exposed back.The boy was clearly the weakest link amongst them, and Mon-El wouldn’t have been ok with just letting him get hurt.

So he’d taken the hit and Kitai had handily finished the Hellgrammite off.

They’d sent the kids off to the shelter with some very stern words and Mon-El had thought nothing more of it… Until his shirt had started to feel uncomfortably wet.

When Kitai looked at him he quickly fixed his posture, trying to look steadier than he felt. He looked up at the sky and then back at Kitai.

He swallowed and tasted metal, quickly licking his lips of any blood that may have appeared.

He had lost Daxam, he wasn’t going to lose Earth.

Even if it meant Earth lost him.

 "We should clear a path."He said, removing his hand and wiping it on his pant leg before giving a roguish smirk."For the lady."

 A small smile appeared on the woman's face as she too regarded the sky monster, and all of the aliens that would be in her little sister’s way slowing her down.

 "Well,” She picked up her sword, dipping slightly to prepare to take off."I am very fond of her."

~*~

Kara flew straight into a battle.

Unintentionally of course.

Apparently, Brainiac wasn’t just going to allow her to ruin his plans.J’onn J’onzz tried to intercept him but the evil alien swatted him away like a fly and Kara was on her own.

Well there were teenagers as well but only three of them… she thought there had been five?

Unable to think about that as she fended off Brainiac’s blows, she instead lent her mind to executing a few punches that hit Brainiac in pressure points at his neck and his thigh.The alien collapsed in on himself and she sought to kick his head but was flung backwards by a ballistic fired from his ship.It seared her flesh and allowed the megalomaniac to close in on her before she could recover.Green hands tightened around her throat and she saw genuine hate reflected in the being’s eyes.

“You!”He snarled.“You would defend them?After all they have done to you?To your child?”

Kara choked, slamming her palms at his ears in an attempt to loosen his hold.The purple teen behind her flew at them, hurling something glowing black at Brainiac’s back.He swatted that away too and his ship shot the teen from the sky.

Gurgling around his hands, Kara let her eyes light up.“I’ve laid my life down for people I hate since I can remember.”She gripped his hands in hers, using all of her considerable strength to pull them away from her neck.“It will be nice to finally do it for those I love.”

And she released her heat vision, the Tamaranian also letting loose with Starbolts from her hands and eyes at the same time.

Brainiac screamed at the onslaught and turned tail back to his ship.

J’onn J’onzz stopped her when she would have followed, injured but determined.“We can keep him busy.Go do what you need.”

Kara nodded, centered herself and then poured every ounce of speed she could into her ascent.

~*~

When Astra flew back to the fight, the last thing J’onn had expected was for her to be carrying a nuke on her back.

He punched Brainiac, distracting the alien enough that Astra was able to fly past them.Which again was not what J’onn had expected.

Instead of attacking Brainiac head on with the nuke, Astra flew it onto his ship and let loose with her heat vision.

Raven simultaneously contained the blast and teleported Astra out of the field of destruction.

And just like that Brainiac’s ship was destroyed, as were the majority of his powers.

It had happened more quickly than J’onn had expected.

The alien howled in anger, and J’onn wasted no time in grabbing the large man and tearing his suit clean in half.He had had enough of getting pummeled and was not keen to wait around and see how powerful Brainiac was without his ship.

Caught off guard, Brainiac was unable to prevent the tearing of his suit and immediately clutched at his throat; his skin turning a slack grey as he was exposed to Earth’s atmosphere.

Earth germs.

He had been protecting himself from Earth germs.

Normally J’onn would have tried to make the alien stand trial but given everything that had occurred, allowing Brainiac to live was a risk he was unwilling to take.Superman had a no killing clause, the Martian Manhunter had no such discernments.

 

~*~

Kara looked at the cloud of darkness before her, and pushed everything she had into speed.This was probably going to hurt.

Fear rattled her all the way to her bones and she wanted nothing more than to turn around and bury herself in Alex's arms.To make this someone else's problem.

She didn't want to die.

She wanted very badly to live.

But she'd made her decision.

Kara had chosen.

She hadn't followed a program or a directive.

Her loved ones were being threatened-- her family-- and she had chosen to fight for them.She wasn't about to fail them now.

Kalasin.

Alex…

Katu, the only reason she'd survived CADMUS.

Ni and Fiora, who had given her a purpose, a reason to hope.

Winn, who had shown her the first real kindness she'd known.

Lena, who had called her family.

Cat, who despite everything saw something great in Kara that she herself still didn't understand.

Eliza, who'd done her best to help her.

Kal-El, who had a family.A son.

Jon.Her baby cousin.

She had a baby cousin.She’d _held_ him.

_When I get scared, my mom sings to me_.

Right.

A song.

…Why could she only think of Disney movies right now?

"I've got no strings," She breathed, wind rushing passed her face.Something flickered in her peripherals and she debated banking and losing the precious speed she'd need to break through the Galactoid or risking the inevitable hit.In the end the decision was made for her as another form slammed into the object from her other side.Kitai, she thought idly.More shapes moved towards her and they were taken down methodically by her sister and… was that Mon-El?

She was close enough to feel the electricity now, and she forced more power into her forward momentum.

"To hold me down." She continued, finally breaking through the sky into the inky blackness that had caused such catastrophe.Pain ran through her body in lightning bolts, jagged knives cutting through her and leaving burning welts across her skin.She screamed in pain and rage, a violent presence of _hate_ pushing at her mind and trying to suffocate her with its immensity.She forced her way through as the monster raged back at her, roaring at her audacity and carving bloody paths into her body.

And then she was out, her body spiraling and pinwheeling as she suddenly found herself with nothing holding her back.It took a moment for her to regain control of her person and realize that she was as close to space as she could get without leaving earth's orbit.To her left a satellite crackled with electricity, purple volts of energy jumping to another satellite in the distance and daisy chaining away into the abyss.

"Make me fret, or make me frown." She mumbled tiredly, body aching and begging for a reprieve.She floated over to the satellite and weighed her options.It wouldn't do to simply destroy one satellite; the chain would simply reconnect itself on the next one.Cat’s satellite had proven that.There had to be a distance though, a max length away that they could be apart before the signal failed.Kara was going to guess 5 Satellites lengths.She could hold on that long.

She would hold on that long.

…this was really going to hurt.

First, she made her way away from America's satellites.No offense to the rest of the world, but she had a feeling Alex's friend Felicity would find a way to bring her back from the dead just to kill her again if she somehow took out their wi-fi.She wasn't all that sure that was how it all worked but she wasn't going to risk it.Plus, she didn't want Winn to miss out on any of his gaming.She hoped he remembered that trick she'd shown him; it should help him get past the last round of playoffs this season in LoL.

"I once had strings, but now I'm free."She braced herself; pressed Kalasin and Alex's faces to the forefront of her mind.Her child's gummy smile; the way Alex looked at her, half in awe and half amused.Her fingers dug into the metal of the satellite, body now a conduit for the purple lightning jumping between the structures and pain like she'd never known running through her very being.Her heart raced in her chest, beating so erratically that Kara feared it would give up sooner than she would be able to break the pattern.Still, she shoved, pushing with everything she had until the large hunk of metal moved and she started gaining momentum.Her heart would hold; it had to.There were no other options.

_Please._ She thought. _Just a little longer; we just have to last a little longer._

One by one the satellites crashed into each other.

She lost track of how many she actually took out.Her hands were useless when she finally stopped.Everything in her was numb but she still had more to do.

Just one more thing.

The Galactoid was still there; would still be there after this was all over, threatening Earth and the people she loved.She’d be damned if she allowed anything to hurt her family after everything she was giving to save them.

So.

Kryptonian Defibrillator.

The energy from the satellites flowed through her, her body acting as a conduit as she served as the last remaining connection.She steeled herself, found the last of her energy and rubbed her hands together as quickly as she could.When she felt like she had enough friction she dropped, her body falling out of the line of energy as she sped back into the Galactoid, hands crackling with purple lightening.The dark monstrosity screeched and lunged towards her, the darkness becoming talons and wrapping around her throat and ankles.

She struggled blind for several seconds before she managed to latch onto its physical form, purple electricity dancing from her palms to the Galactoid and setting the sky alight in purple flames.It screeched, unable to even lash out as it tried to save itself from the near certain demise she had cast its way.

There was a moment; one perfect second where the Galactoid parted and she could see the sun; hovering just so in her line of sight and bathing her in its warmth.

It felt nice.

Darkness edged in on her vision as the sun disappeared from her line of sight, her back going back through the clouds and the last of the enraged Galactoid.

It’s howls of pain followed her down as she tried to understand where her body was.She couldn’t feel anything, her legs, her hands…She actually wondered lazily if they were even still there.

Falling was different than flying, she thought, but it carried its own sense of freedom.

The purple power that had powered the gate was no longer running. 

Her mission was a success.She felt nothing but peace... or maybe that was just her heart giving out.It was barely beating now… no, not beating at all anymore…

_There are no strings on me._

And the ground rose up to meet her.

~*~

Alex ran Lex Luthor over with the Tesla she had stolen outside of CatCo.

Sometimes having a brainy best friend came in handy.Like when you had to hotwire/hack a super smart car.

With insane driving speeds.

Not surprisingly, Lex was pushing himself to his feet when she stepped out of the car.He glowered at her and she glared right back.

“Leaving your party so soon?Pretty sure there are rules against that.”

“What would you know about rules?”Lex sneered, dusting himself off and straightening his clothes out.“Your friends are my enemies, we follow a different set of rules Miss Danvers.”

“Doctor.”

She flung her hand out, the belt at his waist hissing as the EMP she had released fried the circuitry.

Lex blinked at her bored.“Excuse me?”

“I’m a doct—”

Her words were cut off as Lex flung out his hand, moving so quickly that she hadn’t anticipated the move.Her face felt hot and she immediately shut her eyes, her hands coming up to block his next attack.

He didn’t punch her though, instead he grabbed her hair and slammed her head into the hood of her car.

She _felt_ her brain shake, pain erupting behind her eyes as her legs gave up under her.From her new position on the floor, Lex straddled her and started raining down punches on her head.She kept her hands up to block him, but even so, a few of his hits landed and she was reminded that Lillian had sent her darling boy to several elite fighting schools since his childhood.

In the past few months, Alex had taken multiple blows to the head and the effects were starting to show as she slowed down, her brain sloshing around as Lex landed a hit to her cheekbone.Fire erupted over her face, and she let out a harsh grunt, feeling her eye start to swell from popped vessels.Lex raised his hands again and she braced, arms tucking over her head and hunching her body as far down as she could, knowing another blow like that could steal her consciousness… or her life.

A small yip gave her just enough warning to get her legs under her, Wren’s small jaws closing around the back of Lex’s neck.The man howled in pain and reached behind him to pull the small puppy off.Alex used the distraction to twist her hips and roll them so that she could put distance between them.

Which was a mistake since Lex immediately went for his gun.

He aimed it at Wren, still attached to his neck and Alex quickly threw a rock she picked up from the street at his head.It landed with a wet thud, blood spurting from the new wound as Lex rose to his knees, still screaming bloody murder.

Alex stepped over his gun arm, her hands keeping his wrist out and pointed away from her and Wren as she wrapped herself around the arm and fell to her back.He screamed as his arm snapped at the perfectly executed arm bar.His finger squeezed the trigger of his gun, and a few shots sounded deafeningly close to Alex’s ear.She bit his palm, drawing blood but immobilizing the finger.

He screamed again, the sound reverberating her through her shattered eardrums as if from a distance, and Alex snapped the wrist, the gun hanging uselessly.

She rolled away from him and hoisted her own gun.

“Hello again.”

Lex sneered from his position of the floor, bloody and beaten as Wren came to sit next to Alex’s feet.

“What do you think you’ll accomplish here?”He asked, “my lawyers will have me out in a matter of days.”

“You’re not going to trial.”Alex said, shifting her weight and absentmindedly rubbing at her damaged ear.“I’ve been reading a lot.You were the one who cut out Kalasin’s tongue.You hurt her, and Kara… There’s not a court in the world that would have a good enough punishment for you.”

“The aliens?” Lex spat, his lips curling in disgust.“You came after me for those animals?”

Alex shook her head, licking blood from her lips as she fought her desire to just shoot him in the head.“No.I came after you because you took _everything_ from me.I’ve never hated anyone quite so much as I hate you and your mother… and well Non but I took care of that problem pretty well I think.It’s your turn now.”

Lex chuckled and shook his head.“So I guess Brainiac ended the little bitch’s life?It’s more than what she deserved.I wanted to fry the freak but mother—”

A gunshot interrupted his little tirade, and a high-pitched squeal came soon after, the muzzle of Alex’s gun smoking slightly at the discharged ammunition.Blood trailed down the male Luthor’s leg, his body hunching over as he stared in disbelief at his crotch.

“I’ve always wanted to do that.”Alex muttered, her rage now a blanket of ice over her heart.

Fear finally beginning to set in, Lex tried to stand, eyes darting around for an escape.“You’re not going to kill me.You’re the ‘good guy’.”

“No,” Alex disagreed, lowering her weapon and shooting his kneecaps.“I’m not.”

Lex screamed, calling for someone named ‘Enchantress’.No one came and Alex took her time taking out the jumper cables from the front of the Tesla.She’d picked them up on the way over and had every intention of making Lex Luthor die a very painful death.She’d been thinking of this ever since she had seen those videos of Kara, of how they’d been able to program her.That amount of voltage would have killed someone three times Clark’s size and they’d used it on a teenager without batting an eye.

She only wished she could do this over and over and over and over…

Walking back over to Lex, she watched his eyes widen and he dropped himself to his side, wiggling like a worm.It would have been humorous if Alex hadn’t just lost her whole world.This was his fault.None of this would have been possible without the cooperation of the Luthor’s; of the sick fucks who had accepted ALFA’s vibranium in exchange for their silence and money.Kara would still be here.She would be—

She would be here!

Alex stabbed him in the neck with a sedative, low dose so he’d remain conscious.She wanted him to _feel_ this.

He tried to swat her away with his good arm and she broke that too.

He was crying now, snot and sweat glistening on his face, his bald head gleaming in the low light.

“You can’t do this.”He slurred as Alex forced his mouth open.“You’re a hero; a government agent.”

Alex clipped the red cable to his tongue and he screamed, the black cable piercing his shoulder and causing a slow trickle of blood to flow out.

“Not anymore.You took that from me.Now I’m a terrorist and a murderer.”She walked back to the Tesla, ripping off the splashguards and other materials to expose the battery under the car.Once done, she clipped the cables to the battery and pulled herself back out.

Lex was squirming, his head rubbing at his neck as he tried to dislodge the probes.

“I need you to know,” Alex said as her finger hovered over the ignition start.“This is very, _very_ personal.”

She pressed the screen, the hacked software starting the car and igniting the cells in the battery.

Wren whimpered and pressed against her legs.

“ _Alex?”_ Winn called out. _“It’s over.We won!They’re gone!I don’t know what you guys did, but it worked!”_ Winn hooted some more before pausing to listen to Felicity in the background _.“Everyone’s going back to the warehouse.We’ll meet you there!”_

Alex swallowed and said nothing, pulling the earpiece out of her ear and sinking to the ground, Wren curling up in her lap as her head thunked against the side of the car.

Winning sucked.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm kind of scared to leave notes here but here we go?
> 
> It all happened. Everything you read was true. So from the top:
> 
> Mon-El. I've said it before but for anyone who doesn't know, I am not anti-Mon-El. I'm not pro-Mon-El either, he just kind of exists. And now that I know he likes Bon Jovi, I have extended a brittle branch of friendship. It's a WIP. Anyway, he can't fly in the show without the legion ring, but in the comics he can? If I remember correctly he had all or most of Superman's powers including flight so that's the Mon-El we see here.
> 
> Next, Jon and Kally. Remember that even though they are Kryptonian, they're still kids and they still need help. Kalasin is obviously more trained than Jon would be so she takes point in physical stuff but he's gonna have more compassion and understanding than her so he takes lead there. They're a perfect duo.
> 
> Lena, Lucy, Felicity, and Winn.  
> Lucy is hurt pretty bad, yes. Her legs were all torned up... BUT she has a super smart girlfriend and Alex Danvers on her side sooo maybe hope? Felicity got hit with a stinger so we'll see what happens there, I mean she's up and talking and making jokes about Alien Princes so can't be too bad right?
> 
> Katu is still a BAMF but she took out upwards of thousands of alien forces in one blow. She's gonna need a nap. Hopefully that's all that is... maybe...
> 
> Alex and Kelex arguing is my new aesthetic. It was the funniest bit for me to write and I now that S4 is up, I just don't think Alex and technologically inclined super beings get along very well. Weird since I made her two besties Winn and Felicity but... ce la vie.
> 
> Siobhan got out because she met up with the Suicide Squad and screamed their devices into exploding without killing them because magic. They in turn got her collar off of her. Given Lillian's history I don't see her as the 'chipping' humans type so Siobhan only had the collar; Amanda Waller chipped the suicide squad.
> 
> Also, have I mentioned how much I hate Renee?
> 
> Kalasin's crossed arm movement is the ASL way to say I love you. Jon thinks she's saying Wakanda Forever. Obvious language barrier.
> 
> Kara mistaking the 'y' is something that happens in translations often. Thought I'd give a nod to all the linguists out there, particularly the one's who study ancient languages.
> 
> So we should all know by now that at some point in the DCEU Oliver Queen loses an arm. I decided to make it here. He loses his arm here. Bye bye arm. Arrow is out for the rest of this fight. But hey, Astra finds a Nuke so alls well right?
> 
> Kitai saves Mon-El's ass but hasn't yet learned how to speak to humans so is confused when they all stare at her after she easily kills Gorilla Dude. She'll learn.
> 
> So the Geek Squad transferred all of their communication lines over to wi-fi and the internet. Theoretically, if something can carry a wi-fi signal or ethernet signal than it is now online. And, since they already made the networks piggy back off of each other, than there is no real distance mandate. I got this idea from watching Office Christmas Party. HUGELY theoretical and fantastical but man would it be cool. One day. Internet of Everything is coming.
> 
> And then... the Good-bye. Now a lot of you are probably like What. The. Fuck. And I accept that, I really do. This is terrible of me. Just horrible. But everyone gets a good send off in the conclusion so hold your pitchforks and torches til then please. In important news: Kara finally learned how to speak in music lyrics and movie quotes. Quotes from: Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium (Best Movie Ever) and Hamilton. There is also a line where she says she wishes she 'had a hundred years that I could give to you.' That is from When A Monster Calls but I'm saying that's from Kara's head not a movie.
> 
> Mon-El can see his guts soooo... I don't know. I just don't know ok?!
> 
> You gotta hand it to those Titan's they held on strong. Poor kids.
> 
> Astra made Braniac go boom. In the comics Brainiac legit has a weakness against bacteria and disease so J'onn can kill him easy peasy.
> 
> So Kara sang 'There are no Strings on Me' from Pinocchio. Think the slow version from Ultron but less creepy.
> 
> With Kara doing her part to save Earth, Alex had to do hers and that means bye bye Lex with a cameo by Wren my best Friend. He's toast... literally.
> 
> And that is it. That's a wrap. Just the Epilogue left.
> 
> Characters with an unknown fate:  
> Kara  
> Mon-El  
> Oliver  
> Felicity  
> Lucy  
> Katu  
> Cisco  
> BeastBoy  
> Jon
> 
> Thank you all for sticking with me, for your comments, kudos and bookmarks. It means the world!  
> See you next time on Dragon Ball Z.


	24. Don't You Worry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part 1 of Epilogue 1 because of wrote way too much to wrap up loose ends and give everyone as good a send off as possible. :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I broke this chapter right down the middle so the cut off might not be very clean but I'm sure we'll all survive. Maybe. I mean, watch out for falling pianos but yeah other than that, we should be fine.
> 
> Pt. 2 Will be up tomorrow or Tuesday followed immediately by a post epilogue epilogue. It's a thing. Fight me.
> 
> This is still not being beta'd so please forgive any errors this was a BITCH to edit.
> 
> BTW, these new episodes are giving me so many Kalex feels. SO many.
> 
> This song is the Story Title. Yay for conclusions. You Wouldn't Like Me- Sleeping at Last
> 
> Warnings for character deaths, mentions of graphic injuries, social injustice, alcoholism, drug use and depression.
> 
> Also, there were a few commenters who said there was no way I'd kill off Kara and well, just have some tissues ready friends. And remember that we're reading this all the way to the end before we hire any hitmen. Ok, now we can proceed. Enjoy.

** Don't You Worry **

It was dark, and her body was one big ache.She supposed that was from the fighting… maybe.Flashes of the battle were displayed in vivid detail in her mind’s eye, trapping her for another moment before voices pulled her the rest of the way from her slumber.

Annoying voices.

Troublemaking voices.

She opened bleary eyes and confirmed her worst fears: there were roses on her bedside table, a stupid Avengers movie was playing on the hospital TV, and only Alex was in the room hunched over a stack of papers.No Kate.

Maggie licked dry lips, taking in the bruises and cuts littered over her friends face and body.Well at least Maggie hadn’t been the only one who had had their ass handed to them.

Still, when she spoke her voice was little more than a croak, Alex startling violently at the unexpected interruption.

“On your left asshat.”

Alex blinked stupidly, her hands clutching the papers to her chest before a wide grin spread over her face. 

~*~

“Ms. Grant, the world is still reeling from the events of April 6th, can you give any insight into what exactly happened?”

Cat would have normally rolled her eyes but given the question and the history behind it… she just didn’t have it in her.She was exhausted, and she was sad, and she was angry and giving this press conference was the last thing she wanted to do.But after the change in leadership, she had been asked to step in as press secretary.It had been a wise decision, one Cat herself would have made had it been up to her, but she found that everything felt rather heavy.Still her current job gave her more time to spend with Carter and after the last few months she’d had, she was going to use every excuse to be with her son.“I hardly see how much more insight I can possibly share with you.Both CatCo’s Tribune and the Daily Planet gave you every ounce of coverage we could during and after the events in question.The dossier that was released online by a group of refreshingly talented hacktivists details all of the missing pieces.”She paused, her lips pursing as she looked out over the room of reporters, their camera lights flashing in her face as they searched for another angle on a very cut and dry story.“There was a terrorist group that grew in both power and resources because the people _we_ put in power—the people we _trusted—_ cared more about their wallets and reputation than they did about our safety.”

After the final battle was over and victory assured, the last of ALFA’s militants defeated, the remaining respectable politicians had ordered that anyone who had been mentioned in the dossier that Mrs. Smoak and Mr. Schott had put together, be arrested on sight.There had been quite the round up, Maxwell Lord’s smirking face had been plastered all over the local papers.As had Dirk Armstrong, Amanda Waller, a Supreme Court Justice, a few senators, and nearly a third of the House of Representatives.That was on top of the former President and Vice President of the United States and more world leaders, particularly seeing concentrations in the Europe and Asia.The vote in the Senate and House had been quick and brutal in impeaching both men, the Speaker of the House Olivia Marsden being sworn in immediately thereafter and bringing a sense of stability back to the country.

But not trust.

That was severely lacking these days.

“Ms. Grant,” A young blonde reporter stood up, her press badge bright and shiny and new.It made something in Cat’s chest ache.“Can you comment on the fighting at all?We know you were involved in some way; can you tell us the truth behind who was involved?”

“The truth is that humanity was spared from extinction or worse because aliens and meta-humans around the world fought for us.The people that you all have been defiling in your papers and inaccurate stories, _fought_ for us.And many of them paid for that with their lives.That’s why I lend my full support to President Marsden and world leaders when they say that the path to citizenship will be open this coming week.It is high past time that we start seeing these people as our neighbors and allies rather than treating them as little more than animals.They eat, breathe, and love just the same as you and I and because of _our mistakes—_ because of our inadequacies… some of them won’t be going home.”

One of the first things Lois and Cat had sought was a death report; not just a count of the people who had died, but their actual names.The teams had reported them over the restored cell phones and each name had been a blow to Cat’s already frazzled mind.

She didn’t know many of them but watching the group around her react had been more than enough to feel the loss.Being a decent human being had made her feel empathy.

Cisco Ramone had been at the Warehouse when Cat had arrived, the Teen Titan Raven trying to keep him alive as he bled out on the floor.She had saved him but only just and at great personal cost.The girl was currently in a coma as her body healed itself from overexertion.

Kitai’s voice had been breathless, almost disbelieving as she told them they had lost Mon-El.A Daxamite who had been an unexpected but extremely useful resource.

There had been a report that Bob, a large Xiorian who looked like a gentle teddy bear, and Fiora, an electric blue woman, had both given their lives to stop a group of Almerac’s and Valeronian’s that had overrun a fallout shelter.They had saved over a thousand lives.

And it hadn’t stopped at deaths, but crippling injuries as well; Oliver Queen had lost an arm; Lucy Lane would probably never walk again; Kate Kane had been burnt quite badly by an Infernian; and the teenager Victor Stone, codenamed Cyborg, would need extensive repairs.

There had been thousands still listed as missing.

All these lines of intelligence had made Cat sad assuredly, but she was used to news like that.She’d been in the news game for more than half her life now and she knew well how to compartmentalize; how to separate her feelings from her need to get facts.

It had pretty much all fallen away when Agent Danvers had finally responded on comm’s, her voice devoid of any and all emotion, that Kara was dead.

Being so far away from the core team, Cat had only been vaguely aware of what was happening, too busy trying to convince the then President why trusting Lex Luthor was a foolish and likely deadly plan.He had of course ignored her but…

Kara was supposed to be safe.They’d sent her to that alien ship she had.Cat had thought…

Her confusion had shown on a few faces, and the Kryptonian General Astra, wounded and battle weary, had asked Alex to repeat herself.

She had.

Kara was dead.

There was a high-pitched sound to the rear of the group and when Cat looked over her shoulder, she saw Kara’s little girl, Kalasin, running away.

Astra flew after her, but Cat had been frozen.

Lena Luthor less so.She’d ordered a search.Apparently, Kara had been the one responsible for taking down the satellites, and, while such a feat would kill a normal person, Kara wasn’t normal.There was a chance she had survived.

It had been a little over a week and search parties had combed through almost two states surrounding her last known location with no luck.

They’d found bodies, human and alien alike, but no Kara.

She was just gone.

When Alex had returned to base, she had checked on Kalasin, who hadn’t wanted to see her, and then gone straight to the med bay looking for a woman named Katu.Cat remembered her vaguely as a rather eccentric young woman but hadn’t paid too much attention to her in her grief.No one really had; she’d been placed in a quiet corner since it appeared, she was simply sleeping.Alex had sat by her bedside for almost two days before she had woken up.When she had, the agent had delivered the news to her.

Cat hadn’t been there when it had happened but, in the article that Lois had written up and passed on to Cat for co-distribution, she had stated that Katu had looked at Alex and simply rolled over to go back to sleep.She hadn’t woken up since apparently unwilling to exist in a world where her best friend did not.

“We failed them.” Cat continued, hands clenching on the podium in front of her.“They had every reason to leave us to our fate and yet they stood with us.I am calling on _all_ politicians to make the right decision.To offer not only a path to citizenship but also a new home.Access to basic resources such as healthcare, jobs, credit.They have more than earned it.CatCo will provide legal counsel to any alien or meta-human who comes to us for aid; we will not out you, we will not turn you away.You are our friends,” her voice wavered slightly, and she fought to regain her composure.“and we will stand by you from now on.”

~*~

“And you’re sure this is official?No hiding? No red tape?”

“No red tape.”Lucy confirmed, her laptop propped open in front of her on the hospital tray.Alex had told her that that was for food, not computers but had only received a glare in turn.“Those papers make you the guardian of Kalasin Zorel, and you have all the rights and privileges of a full-blooded parent.I included birth certificates, social security, everything you could want or need.”

Alex nodded, leafing through the folder Lucy had handed her.“How’d you get me on a birth certificate?Doesn’t that require medical records or—”

“You’re not on the birth certificate.I said guardian, not parent Danvers.Kara Zorel is listed as her birth mother and I left birth father as unknown/deceased.”Alex’s head shot up, meeting the fierce but soft gaze of Lucy Lane.“She shouldn’t be erased.She lost enough while she was alive; I’m not taking anything from her now that she’s dead.”

A lump the size of Texas lodged itself in Alex’s throat and her eyes burned, making her quickly drop her eyes back to the paperwork in her hands.“Thank you.”

“Shut it, Danvers.You’re family.”There was a grin on Lucy’s face, but she looked tired, the bags under her eyes heavily pronounced.Getting your legs ripped open by aliens tended to exhaust you.Artax had done all he could and had saved a lot of the tissue that she would need to regain function, but he couldn’t regrow nerves.Lucy was currently Alex’s test monkey for her regen formula.She had reanimated Maggie’s nerves; regrowing them would be a whole other mess.

Alex nodded again and was grateful when J’onn knocked on the door, allowing himself entry only when Lucy granted it.

Such a gentleman.

“Ladies,” he acknowledged, looking sharp in a black suit and forest green tie.“Sorry for interrupting but I wanted to check in with Ms. Lane.”

“Don’t you mean General Lane?”Alex teased, trying to alleviate the rest of her butterflies.“I heard there was a promotion after all the hubbub died down.”

Lucy rolled her eyes and threw a cup of Jell-O at her that Alex caught only marginally slower than she normally would.“That’s funny because _I_ heard you _quit._ Mind explaining that one Assistant Director?”

Alex didn’t take the bait, giving nothing more than a careless shrug and a wry smile.“The thing is that I have a kid now; I can’t afford to keep putting my life on the line on missions.” She stood, slapping J’onn’s shoulder lightly with her folder.“Besides, as much as I love this oaf, I can’t in good conscious be a part of the DEO.While I understand the work we do, I can’t promote it anymore.Kara was right, as much as we see ourselves as the good guys…”She shook her head, a feeling akin to shame settling low in her gut, “those aliens are terrified of us.I don’t want to be a part of anything that promotes fear.”

The funerals for Bob and Fiora had been held at the alien camp and Alex had brought Kalasin along with her to pay her last respects.The eyes of the community had shifted to them immediately and they had not all been accepting.Particularly those of the Thermigarians.They had entrusted Alex to bring their children home and instead the ones who had fallen for ALFA’s ploys were all being carted off to prisons.To them she was little more than a traitor.Yreifpkl hadn’t even been able to look at her.Alex knew logically that it wasn’t her fault; that those aliens had chosen their own path but the fact of the matter was that there _wouldn’t_ be any trials.This had been a global event; a lot of the people who had been fooled by ALFA would be permanently jailed or killed regardless of age, cause, or planet.And Alex had had a hand in making that happen.There was no honor in that—nothing to be proud of when your work ended someone else’s life.

“We only house _dangerous_ aliens Agent Danvers.”J’onn arched a brow at her, his arms crossed against his chest giving him an imposing figure.

“Dangerous to who J’onn?Who gets to decide that?It’s not like there’s a trial.”She shook her head again, “it’s _not_ fair and I just—”

“Can I interrupt?”It was Alex’s turn to roll her eyes at _Lucy,_ but she rolled her wrist for the woman to continue.Lucy leaned forward in her hospital bed, hands clutched in her blanket and shit eating grin on her face.“The reason J’onn is here Agent Dumbass is to give me my start date.You’re looking at the new Director of Legal Affairs for the Department of Extranormal Operations.”

“A department,” J’onn continued, “that will act as an embassy for every alien and meta-human; providing access to legal counsel, citizenship, and career services.We will no longer just be a jail Alex.We have full funding from the government and backing from the heads of L-Corp, Wayne Enterprises, Hamilton Arms, and Smoak Technologies.We expect to open 5 more divisions within the next 3 years in Europe, Asia, South America, and Australia.Ms. Lane is not only a General now, she is also a military judge and can grant citizenship where needed.She is the first judge authorized to proceed over off world citizenship cases.”

Well… that was new information.

“Do you remember when I said that you and I needed to have a talk?Let’s start now.You are the _worst.”_ She slapped his arm with her folder, scowling impressively at his amused form.

J’onn chuckled, “I legally couldn’t tell you any of this.You were still on the board for terrorism, as well as being a CADMUS operative.We needed to wait until you were completely cleared before bringing you on board.”

“And let me guess?”Alex waved the papers at Lucy.“There’s something in here that says I’m cleared.”

Lucy’s grin was smug.“I do enjoy that look on your face, but I admit I cannot take all of the credit.Winn was the one who provided all the documents.Felicity had already started a nice folder, but she was still unconscious when we needed to submit.”

“I hate you both so much.”

“Hopefully not enough to decline coming back to the new DEO.”J’onn rumbled, turning further towards her, eyes now serious.

Although it hurt her to do it, Alex shook her head.“I won’t put Kalasin at risk J’onn.As… _amazing_ as what you guys have done is… I can’t risk that girl becoming an orphan twice.I can’t just think about myself anymore.You were the one who kept trying to drill that into my brain, remember?”

“As touching as that is,” Lucy said, pulling Alex’s attention, “J’onn and I don’t want you as a field agent.You would probably start another war.”

Alex balked, jaw dropping at the rude implication.“I did _not_ start a war!”

“Regardless,” Lucy waved her hand, grin still excited. “Your field agent credentials are sketchy, but you _are_ the leading expert on alien biology and physiology. _And_ you have an M.D.”

Alex squinted, “so?”

“ _So_ , doofus!We want _you_ to be the Chief Medical Officer and lead the Department of Health within the DEO.It will be your baby; your staff, your choice, your decisions… as long as they’re legal.”

There was a long pause, Alex’s brain not catching up to Lucy’s words as quickly as her ears.Silence pervaded her thoughts, her mind completely blank and she wondered idly if she had had a stroke of some kind.

“You want me to open a hospital?”

“Well, it will be more of a clinic at first.”J’onn admitted.“There were some concerns regarding buildings and construction.However, Ms. Luthor managed to buy the top four floors of the building next to us.Construction will take a few months to complete, but, in the interest of safety, we asked Barry and Clark to speed things up on the top floor.It’s rough but it will do for now.”

“We thought you’d appreciate the windows.”Lucy teased.

Alex blinked back tears now, her hands fisting at her sides.But she didn’t speak, afraid that she would lash out at her well-meaning friends.

She wasn’t overwhelmed by their kindness, essentially having them offer her, her dream job.She was _pissed._ This had been what _Kara_ had wanted.For Alex to take an interest in the _lives_ of aliens rather than just their actions.To know the why, instead of just the what.

Now, here she was, starting on the path to that end and Kara wasn’t even here to see it.

A familiar cold feeling of dread filled her; the thought that she would have to think like that, realize that Kara was gone, every day for the rest of her life nearly bowling her over.

She took a deep breath, closing her eyes for a moment as she fought to re-center herself.When she opened her eyes, both J’onn and Lucy were looking at her with an understanding that made her squirm and tuck the paperwork under her arm.

J’onn was pulled to her quickly in a one-armed hug, a jerky nod her response to their offer.“Thanks.I can start on Monday.”

It was Thursday now.

“We’ll see you on Monday Dr. Danvers.”

Another nod, and she was gone, hands stuffed in her pockets as she walked briskly from the room.

Her heart pounded against her chest, feeling like it was bruising itself against her ribcage in an effort to get out.

Realistically she understood that the pain of losing Kara was still fresh, that it would take years for her to be ‘ok’.That kind of trauma didn’t just fade in a few days.

But selfishly, she was glad of the pain.It was proof that Kara had been there; that she had loved Alex as much as Alex had loved her.That she hadn’t _lost_ her; that Kara had given her everything and Kara hadn’t taken it back.

Just when she was feeling like she would pass out from the pain, she rounded the corner to the waiting room and saw Kalasin coloring pages with her mother, Eliza’s face soft and wonderstruck as she spoke softly to the girl.

Eliza had _not_ taken Kara’s death well and for a moment, Alex had been afraid she was going to fall off the wagon again.Her mom had surprised her by asking Alex to join her at an AA meeting.It wasn’t the same as an NA meeting but it had helped Eliza find her center all the same.Losing her adoptive daughter _twice_ would be a hard pill for anyone to swallow and Eliza found her strength in her family.Having her stick around had been one of the best things to come from all of this.

They were both knelt down in front of a low table and Kalasin’s stuffed bear that she had named Harley was sitting in front of her.Harley had thought _that_ was the cutest thing ever and had given the girl a lab coat for the bear with the name Quinzel on the breast.

So now Alex was fairly certain she had a voodoo doll in her home.

As Kalasin colored the grey trunk of an elephant, her face pinched in concentration, Alex thought she might be able to live with that.If she had this little ball of sun in her life, this small piece of Kara, she might be able to live with a lot of things.

It didn’t ease her pain at all, but it helped her cope.

Kept her sane.

“Hey kid,” Alex prompted as she came upon them, leaning down to press a kiss to Kalasin’s head.“Ready to go?I think my mom said something about Ice Cream?”

Kalasin’s eyes lit up and Eliza glared at Alex who only chuckled, reaching down to lift Kalasin into her arms while Eliza collected her things.

Eliza had been beside herself when Alex had stumbled in after the battle, Wren clutched tightly in her arms.Her mother had grabbed Alex tight and hadn’t let go for what felt like hours.Alex couldn’t blame her.She’d watched as more people had filtered into the meeting site, looking for loved ones.Seeing— _feeling_ Wren wilt when she couldn’t find her mother; hearing Pam’s desperate cries for Harley… it had been a bad day all around.

Eliza hadn’t let her out of her site since.

“You laugh now, but _you’ll_ be the one entertaining her during her sugar high.”Alex shrugged, holding Kalasin close as they left the hospital.Kalasin may be old enough to walk, but she preferred human contact and was almost always seeking some form of affection from Alex, Astra, Harley, and now Eliza.She still hadn’t warmed up to Clark.

A fact that Alex would not stop ribbing him about.

“She’s gotta be easier to take care of than I was.I distinctly remember that I blew up dad’s lawnmower trying to make a spaceship.”

Kalasin laughed silently, her arms wrapped loosely around Alex’s neck.Eliza reached out and tickled her, the small girl squirming away and releasing a breathless giggle.

It lightened Alex’s heart further and she smothered Kalasin’s cheek in kisses.

“You were a nightmare.”Eliza admitted, “you got that from your father.He was always a trouble magnet as well.”They stepped into the elevator and Eliza turned glowing eyes towards her.“When we lost him, I was so worried for you; angry for myself.I wanted so much to be enough, to be some sort of Super Parent so that you never lacked for anything.I thought the world owed me something after taking so much away.That I would never have the opportunity to be _great._ To be the scientist or mother that I wanted to be.But now… now I think I didn’t need any of that because I had you.You were always more than enough.”

And just like that, Alex was crying.

She swiped at her face with her free hand, Kalasin pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead and doing a set of complicated motions with her hands.

“I’m sorry,” Alex said, catching the small fingers with her own.“I haven’t gotten that far yet.”

“Plus, she knocked her head around a few too many times.”Eliza confided with a smile.To Alex she said, “she wants to know if you’re alright.”

Because of course everyone knew ASL _except_ Alex.To be fair, Eliza _was_ a world-renowned doctor and gave multiple lectures around the globe.It made sense that she would know sign language.

Even if it did make her daughter look bad.

Alex rolled her eyes and hugged Kalasin close.“I’m fine Stitch, my mom just thinks it’s fun to say nice things at inopportune moments.”

Eliza threw her head back and laughed.

~*~

Winn hissed as the last piece of metal was laid over the mold, the chip underneath the plate connecting flawlessly in Alex’s opinion and sending a blue glow over the finished arm.

“Did we just make a baby?”

Alex rolled her eyes and snapped her latex glove at the soft idiot, careful of the rather impressive scratches on his arms from exploding shrapnel.After two weeks they had finally started to heal, much like everything else, but they still looked painful.

“If I had to make a baby arm with someone, I’m glad it was you.”She stood from her seat, stretching out her back as Winn walked over to a stressed looking Felicity.

“Aw, I knew you liked me.”

Alex lowered the glass cage over the silver arm.“Don’t push it.Ready Fe?”

Felicity didn’t respond, and Alex pushed down the wave of worry.To be fair, if she had been in Felicity’s position, she would have been beside herself as well.To wake up and discover that your husband’s arm had been lasered off had to be a lot.

Oliver had surprisingly taken it well.Or at least as well as anyone could take losing half of their arm.He’d been upset about the seeming loss of his vigilante career but more than grateful that he was still around for William and Felicity.

Alex had a feeling it was all the funerals they’d attended or seen on TV that had helped him gain that clarity when he normally might have sulked and brooded for hours.

Felicity was the one sulking and brooding now.

Which again Alex understood… slightly.

She personally would have given anything to have Kara here with just a missing arm, but she knew her friend’s fear stemmed more from her almost losing Oliver and not knowing.Of them being so far apart that she’d had no idea he was even injured and that she had been powerless to save him.

In that vein, Felicity felt like a failure as a wife and partner. So, she’d approached Alex about this.About making him a new arm.

And well, Alex had very badly needed the distraction at the time.

She’d been crashing at a hotel that Lena had basically rented out, intent on being a good guardian for Kalasin and _not_ diving back into a bottle.

She hadn’t been very successful and, although Vasquez was not her sponsor by any stretch of the imagination, she found herself on the phone with her colleague more often than not when the urge to drink had her grabbing for keys and wallet.

Most times Vasquez just drove over to her and they’d sit outside and just talk.Alex ranting about whatever was going on in her head or Vasquez giving her updates on small cases they’d had come in.Anything to keep her grounded; keep her in the now.

It was in this way that she became so close to Kitai.

Kara’s sister was a lot more playful than Kara had been.More of an arrogant sarcastic demeanor than puppyish.And she spoke to Kalasin like the girl was an adult, getting great fun out of her responses and laughing hysterically whenever Alex would get scandalized over their conversations.

Alex was fairly certain that _Kitai_ was the reason Kalasin suddenly wanted to get her own motorcycle.Alex hadn’t been able to ride her own bike, so she knew it wasn’t _her_ fault.

Unfortunately, the storage facility where Felicity had put her bike had been demolished during the attack and her Ninja was no more.

That one had hurt.

Nevertheless, Alex was now apparently supposed to be looking for matching toddler and adult bikes for her and Kalasin because Kalasin insisted that they match, the little tyrant.

Again, Kitai’s fault, not Alex’s.

Alex’s only say was that they include a side car for Wren.Wren’s younger sibling had chosen to stay at the alien compound, rebuilt by Ni.They had followed their mother’s footsteps and had chosen a humanoid form as their final metamorphosis. And, with the backing of Smoak Technologies and CatCo, had started to build the small camp into an actual community, the first of its kind.Catering to aliens and metas alike, the community would be based on the idea of Xantu; of found family and friends.Alex thought their mother would be very proud.

Wren had chosen to stay in her wolf form for her brother Champ but had turned her tawny fur blue for her mother.She was a staple in Alex’s home and her bed; yet another person that Alex found herself checking in on when she had not signed up for any such role.

She remembered the small choking cries that Wren had released when she’d learned that her mother was gone; cries she still released some nights when she woke up from a nightmare or vivid memory.It had been painful to witness and hear but, selfishly, it had also brought Alex some solace to know she wasn’t the only one in mourning.She wasn’t the only one struggling to continue living.

But it gave her another thing to focus on and she wouldn’t exchange the trust she had received for anything in the world.

She was finding that the people in her life were trying to give her other things to think about rather than the gaping hole that existed in her life where Kara had fit so perfectly; where her dreams for her and Kara’s future—dreams she hadn’t even told herself existed—had been torn away.

They were just flaps of shredded feelings now, fluttering in the swirling black hole.Alex was trying to stitch them together, make the ends close so that she could at least stop feeling so cold and empty; like she was going to swept away in the vortex and never resurface.

It was just taking longer than she had expected.

Helping Felicity with this arm though, well that had helped a lot.

Distracting herself with house hunting had also been great.

When she’d found her last apartment, she’d had few requirements; big windows, wood floor, and a tub.It had been fairly easy to find that, especially with her salary at the DEO.There hadn’t been a lot of parking on her block, but her building had a freight elevator so whenever she couldn’t find parking, she just hauled her bike up to her apartment.

Tedious, yes; but Alex hadn’t minded.

She knew she’d mind now.As much as she was coming to love Kalasin, the girl had a crazy amount of energy and Alex tired much more easily these days.Kalasin asked questions constantly, and while Alex had made great strides in learning ASL, she was nowhere near a level of conversation.She’d given Kalasin a whiteboard instead with a green dry erase marker, because green was Kalasin’s favorite color.Kally would scribble out her questions, get her answer and then scribble some more.

She’d cross things out, draw diagrams, and get frustrated when Alex didn’t understand her.

And _Alex_ would get frustrated that Alex didn’t understand her and so they’d retreat to opposite ends of their hotel room.Alex would call in Kitai, who had learned ASL in less than a day, and frantically try to cram more of the language into her head.

Kalasin would vent to her aunt, frustrated little crying hiccups making their way to Alex’s ears and making her feel like a complete failure.

She’d promised Kara she’d take care of her daughter and she was screwing it up so badly that she had to call in reinforcements nearly every day.

Eliza would tut at her, telling her that the old adage ‘it takes a village’ was very true and that, given Kalasin’s disability, it would take even more than that.

Alex didn’t listen to her.

_Eliza_ hadn’t employed a village.She’d rolled up her sleeves and done it herself, and before that Alex only ever remembered Jeremiah stepping up to the plate.Her parents had been formidable in their teamwork and, once Eliza had kicked her dependencies, she had been a hell of a single mother.

Alex was a single mother now and she felt like she was in a constant state of ‘where the hell is the adult when you need them?’

Kitai had laughed when she’d told her that, nudging Alex with her shoulder as she shook her head in exasperation.“Kalasin has never had a parent.”Alex had opened her mouth to protest those words, feeling painfully that Kitai was erasing Kara’s role in Kalasin’s life, but she hadn’t gotten that far.Kitai had given her the look, the look she gave anyone when they questioned whether or not she had cared for Kara.The depths of her pain were unfathomable, reflecting in her dark eyes and making Alex feel uncomfortably like she was in a freefall.She’d been forced to look away, ashamed of herself for discrediting Kitai’s feelings; Kara’s sister’s feelings.If _anyone_ had a right to be hurt, it was Kitai.

“I loved my sister,” Kitai continued, voice soft and filled with purpose.“I would not presume to say she was a bad mother.She never had the _chance_ to be a mother.From what Kalasin has told me, they only saw each other a handful of times.And even then, only for a few moments.It was hardly enough for either of them to understand what a mother-daughter relationship entailed.As much as you say you don’t know how to be a mother… she has no idea how to be a daughter.”She’d rested a hand on Alex’s shoulder, squeezing gently when Alex had looked completely gob smacked.“Maybe instead of trying to fit roles you don’t understand, you just be yourself.Figure it out together.”

And so, Alex had taken Kalasin house hunting.

She didn’t know how to be a mom.But she knew how to be a good person and she knew that Kalasin hadn’t had a lot of say in where she lived up ‘til now.

Alex was going to give her that say.

Eventually, after an exhaustive search that had kept them both distracted and had forced them to be together and learn about each other, they’d settled on an old firehouse.

The thing was in complete disrepair, crumbling at the edge of the city, having been one of the first places that ALFA had attacked.It was also incredibly cheap and incredibly large.

Kalasin had been in love with the fire pole and had done little more than a stick her bottom lip out before Alex was signing paperwork.

It was still under construction, but between J’onn, Harley, Clark, Astra, and Kitai—her own posse of super strength construction workers—they’d at least made it weatherproof and habitable.

They had two and a half functional bedrooms and a working bathroom.

The kitchen was in process of being built and they’d taped off the living room so that Alex could get a skylight installed.The work was actually quite easy to do yourself when you didn’t like to sleep, and you had a Kryptonian child to care for.

Alex’s nights were plagued with memories and pain, her new norm being to wake up drenched in sweat and aching for Kara.Most times she’d still be crying, Wren’s rough tongue licking tears from her cheeks as Alex crushed her to her chest.

The first time it had happened, she had allowed herself the indulgence of slipping into the guest room with her mother and sobbing in Eliza’s arms.Her mother had held her close to her chest, rocking Alex like she had when she was a little girl afraid of the boogie man.

“I’m so sorry.”Eliza had choked out, her own tears heavy in her voice.“I never wanted this for you honey.I never wanted you to know this pain.”

On those rare nights she allowed herself to sleep, she’d whisper her fears to the small Nalger allowing her burdens to come into the light to someone she knew would never spill her secrets.Other times she’d call up Felicity or Vasquez until they talked her down.Or she’d go out onto the balcony and eventually Selina, who was staying on their couch while her head fixed itself, would come out and talk to her.Sometimes the Sirens would take her out, just on a walk until she felt comfortable enough to at least lay down again.

Since Eliza was staying in the barely done guest room, she rarely had to worry about leaving Kalasin alone.

Usually Kalasin would awake from a nightmare and she and Alex would spend the rest of the night working on a piece of their home until the sun came out and it was safe to sleep again.Then Harley would wake them up with breakfast somewhere around noon and have a session with Kalasin, having agreed to be her therapist before Alex could even think to ask.

Sometimes Alex would stay, making sure Kalasin knew she was around.Others she would take the opportunity to see her own therapist or go to an AA meeting.

After therapy sessions, Alex usually liked to throw on a movie.The first one they had watched together—Wren, Kalasin, and herself—had been Lilo and Stitch.A movie that Alex had chosen purposefully because of its message.They had all cried like babies and Kalasin had claimed the nickname ‘Stitch’.Alex didn’t argue because the girl’s grumpy levels could often rival Stitch’s when she was pushed _and_ because she found Kalasin to be extremely cute and fluffy.

There were also the times where she would go out and just walk; used to her bachelor life, it was a learning curve to have someone near her _all_ the time.It wasn’t that she didn’t want Kalasin around, but being alone, being able to hear her own thoughts and not having to worry about how that affected another person, that was a freeing experience.

It had also given her the time to brainstorm on Oliver’s new limb.

The limb that was green on all tests so far… now for the motor response.

Felicity tapped a few keys, a metal brace fitted just above her elbow as she took a step back and flexed her fingers.

The arm mimicked her movements.

There was a moment of stunned silence that they had actually done this and then Felicity was collapsing in tears, Winn was whooping, and Alex was rushing to console her friend.

They were all rebuilding.

It was taking some time, but they were making progress.

~*~

“So still no word from Siobhan huh?”Alex tried to ask the question as gently as possible, but she had never been known for her couth.

Winn wincing told her that it had still been a rough delivery.Siobhan was one of the people they had registered as ‘missing’ along with Alex’s father, Jeremiah Danvers.When they had all gotten back to the warehouse there had been a lot of wounded, a lot of debris and an empty chair where Jeremiah had last been seen strapped down.Either he’d been carried off and killed or he’d been carried off and saved by an ALFA agent.Either way, Alex had been way too much of a mess to even consider going after him at the time.

“Not since just after the battle.”He responded with a shrug.

According to Winn, he had been in the hospital, the stitches he had had to get on his forearm, going almost up to his armpit.Siobhan had come to him the night after he had been admitted.She hadn’t said much, had just waited for him to wake up, brushed some hair from his face, whispered that she was sorry and flown out the window.

It had been an emotional time for Winn and he had spent a good amount of time trying to escape his bed to chase after her.

Now, with almost a full half week head start, he was no closer to finding her than he had been more than two weeks ago.

They watched through the window as Felicity fitted Oliver’s arm with the metal brace, the circular nerve receptors pressing against his skin and sealing the arm to his body.

He glared at the metal fingers and willed them to work, his face easing when they responded to his commands easily.

Alex grimaced when, in his excitement Oliver made the fist clench and accidentally punched a hole through the table his elbow had been resting on.

They’d have to tune that up.

“You goin after her?”

Winn wrinkled his nose and shook his head.“I still want her, but I don’t think it was like what happened between you and Kara.”He turned to her, his face pinched in thought.“Kara was… undoubtedly in love with you.CADMUS or no, that was real, and she pursued you for her own interests.When I first confronted her about liking you…Alex she could have just become your friend, maybe just been a superspy and learned all of your secrets from afar.She _chose_ to be with you.”He shrugged again, his lips slipping into an almost self-deprecating grin.“Siobhan chose to be with me too.I know that she wanted me… but I think it was because I was convenient.I don’t think it’s because there were any lasting feelings that made her heart stutter and sacrifice her life to save the world you know?”

Alex rolled her eyes and turned back to Oliver and Felicity, the couple wrapped around each other as their last hurdle was overcome.

“You don’t want unselfish love Winn.It sucks.”

He bumped her with his shoulder.“It might hurt now, but that just means it was really great.”He paused, lips pinched in thought for a moment before he turned steady eyes to meet hers.“You’re the hero Alex.You’re the one who gets the great love story.You _deserved_ the great love story.”

Sucking in a shaky breath, Alex quietly admitted, “I miss her.”

“Me too…”He nodded, and Alex could see his pain and regret in every gesture. “I wish I had talked to her before… I just felt really awkward.Like it wasn’t the right time or something.That seems really, really stupid now.”

“Yeah.” Alex agreed, choking back a laugh at the understatement.“I just want her back.I want—”

The words got lost in the half sob that escaped her and Winn pulled her into a hug, banding his arms around her startingly tight.

They stayed there for several moments until a tall teenager in scrubs came rushing up to them.

“Um excuse me, are you Alex Danvers and Winn Shot?”

Winn rolled his eyes and released her.“Close enough.”

The teenager nodded quickly.“Um good, good.Dr. Natu said you should come to the chapel as soon as possible.”

Alex tensed, Felicity poking her head out of Oliver’s room with concerned eyes.“What’s going on?”

Dr.Natu was Maggie’s doctor.

“Oh, nothing ma’am.I think it’s just an impromptu wedding.We just need witnesses.”

“What?”Alex asked stupidly.

Winn meanwhile squealed and grabbed Alex’s arm, taking off towards the hospital’s chapel.They burst through the church doors, Maggie and Kate both in wheelchairs at the altar, a large screen for what looked like a Skype call set up on the side.Felicity and Oliver came though seconds after them, Felicity beaming in excitement as she kept running straight up to Kate, wrapping the woman in a tight hug before repeating the hold on Maggie.

“Oh, you guys!This is so exciting!”

“You’re getting married?” Alex tried very hard not to let the confusion show on her face but when Maggie rolled her eyes, she knew she had failed.

“You’ve known that for how long now Danvers?”

“Yeah but… Fiji…”

“Fiji will be there.”Kate said, eyes glowing as she looked at Maggie.“We don’t want to spend another moment not being married.We can have the big ceremony later if we still want.”

Maggie mirrored her look.“I just want you.”She turned to Felicity after a moment of gross adorableness.“Felicity do you think you could help us with the computer?Kate’s dad was gonna skype in.”

Felicity awed, and punched Oliver’s arm who abruptly turned his face away to hide his grimace.Alex smiled and fought a laugh.

A few moments later, Felicity had not only Kate’s father but J’onn, Vasquez and Kitai, Lois, the Sirens, Team Bat, the Titans, and Team Arrow on the call.

Then Lucy was being wheeled in, Lena by her side and, before Alex could ask how many people they had invited to this thing, Lucy was brought to the front of the church. Her CNA turned her, so she was facing the small gathering, before handing Lucy a small buzzer and leaving.

Lena handed Lucy a small tablet and dropped a kiss to her head before moving to sit in one of the pews.

“Get a move on Danvers.You’re my best woman.”Maggie said, holding out her hand but not taking her eyes from Kate.

The redhead beamed and held out her own hand, “Winn I know I was supposed to have Renée, but would you mind standing in as my Man of Honor?”

Winn beamed and dragged Alex to the front, the former Agent taking her friend’s hand while Winn moved to stand next to Kate.Oliver and Felicity moved to sit with Lena and it was only when everyone was finally situated that Lucy began.

“Geez you guys take long to get ready.”The brunette declared as Kate giggled, and Maggie released a breathless laugh.“Since pretty much everyone in here is sore and injured we’ll keep this short and sweet, which is great because Maggie is short, and Kate is sweet.Badum cha.”Lena facepalmed and Alex gave Lucy a crisp high five.“Maggie and Kate invited us all to celebrate their union; a union they have overcome death itself to achieve.I think I speak for everyone when I say that we are _so_ honored to be here.”There was a small sniffle from the crowd and when Alex looked over her shoulder, she saw Felicity crying quietly into Oliver’s shoulder, her husband pressing soft kisses to the crown of her head.Her heart ached at the display and she forced herself to turn back to the ceremony in front of her.“Did you get the rings?”

Kate blinked, the smile dropping slightly from her face in realization.“Oh… no I—”

“Yes, you do!”Clark zoomed in with James Olsen in his arms, Kalasin and Jon rushing in behind him.“Lo called and said you might need these.She said Lucy called… sorry we’re late.”

Kalasin bypassed them all and rushed up to Alex, arms already out to be picked up.Alex gave her a soft smile and acquiesced, holding her close as Clark dropped the rings into either woman’s hand before taking a seat in the pews with Jon and James.Clark Kent, ring bearer.Heh.

Grins back in place, Maggie and Kate exchanged another loving look prompting Lucy to continue.“I was told you had your own promises you wanted to make?”

“We were just gonna wing it,” Maggie admitted with a breathless laugh.Her smile grew the longer she looked at Kate, “do you want me to start or…?”

Kate nodded.“You can go.”

Another small laugh and a look of absolute awe and disbelief.“Kate… I promise to do your laundry.”Kate burst out laughing, Alex’s grin nearly splitting her face in half at Maggie’s vows.“I promise to leave a light on, so you don’t walk into the stationary counter; I will keep caramel fudge ice cream in the freezer at all times and when you inevitably get into yet another bar fight, I promise to post your bail.”Maggie squeezed her fiancée’s hands, the first tear slipping down her face.“I promise to love and care for you for as long as I am able.You lost something you wanted because the people around you didn’t understand you; couldn’t see passed their own prejudices to see what an amazing woman you are but Kate… you _never_ have to worry about ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’ with me.I want to know everything.I invite you to talk my ear off with silliness and whisper your confidences when you are comfortable.In return I promise to be your safe place; Kate I promise I will be your home.”

Well dammit now _Alex_ was crying, trying and failing to hide her face in Kalasin’s hair.

The good thing was that _everybody_ was crying.

Well, everyone except Oliver but the big oaf was at least smiling.

Kate sniffled, several moments passing as she tried to gain control of her emotions.

“I wanted mine to be better than yours!”She cried, Maggie leaning forward with a full belly laugh to wipe away her tears since Kate’s hands were still bandaged.

“Next time.”Maggie promised, full of love and hope.

Kate shook her head.“Maggie, I don’t know how we got here.For so long we both dodged this; either of us caught up in our desire to keep _other_ people safe and happy.When I almost lost you… _god…_ See this is why my people don’t do romantic shit like this!”

Maggie laughed again, and Jon rushed forward with a handkerchief.Kate gave him a kiss for his troubles and he blushed to the roots of his hair before speeding back over to his father.

“Take your time.”Maggie offered, “I’m very well rested.”

This time it was Alex who whacked her in the head.Gently.

“When I almost lost you,” Kate continued with an eyeroll for her own emotions while dabbing at her face with the handkerchief.“I was so angry because I thought that I had missed out.That I would never get the chance to show you how much you meant to me; that I would happily give up my nightly activities if it meant I got to keep you.Maggie… I know that your family told you that you didn’t deserve happiness.That they said you would never find anyone who loved you.But honey I swear that is not true.And today… Maggie on our wedding day, I promise that it never will be.I promise to love you unequivocally; no matter how angry I get, or how angry you get, my love will never diminish.Maggie, I promise to always be on your side, even when you are wrong, I will stand by you and kick you only when we are in private.I promise… I promise you will never need a Plan B; no contingency plans, no safe houses.I promise to be yours; your family… your always.In every way you need me, I will support you.I love you so much Maggie Sawyer…”Kate beamed, and Alex felt the happiness in the room invade her own chest.“Now kiss?”

Everyone laughed, and Maggie had to take a moment to wipe her own face, Jimmie Olsen snapping away with his camera, the first useful thing Alex had ever seen him do.

“Not yet,” Lucy deterred.“We need to get the legal stuff out of the way.”She cleared her throat, glancing down at the tablet in her hand before looking back at the couple in front of her.“Do you Katherine Kane take Maggie Sawyer as your lawful wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward; for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish until death do you part?”

Kate’s voice was clear and happy as she confirmed her vows.“I do.”

“And do you Margaret Sawyer—”

“Yes, yes I do.Skip to the good stuff please!”

Lucy scoffed but gestured at their hands.“Rings!”

The couple giggled like school girls as they exchanged wedding bands, Kate holding hers tight as the bandages would not allow for her to place it on her finger.

Shaking her head fondly Lucy continued, “then by the power invested in me by the United States of America I now pronounce you, wife and wife.You may now kiss the bride.”

There were whoops and hollers, the assembly all rising to applaud the couple who was oblivious to them all. Between kisses, the socialite and the detective—Alex’s _family—_ whispered their love for each other and when she looked around the room, she saw that love reflected in everyone else as well.

They’d nearly died, nearly lost everything… But they were still here.

They’d survived.

Now, it was time to get on with the living part.

Moving carefully, Alex pushed Kalasin back just enough that they could see each other.Kalasin tilted her head in confusion but teared up when Alex held up her hand, her fingers upright and spread except for her index and middle which she had tucked into her palm.Pressing a gentle kiss to Kalasin’s temple, she moved her hand to her chin and then away allowing it to drop back to the child’s hip at the end of the move.

“I love you Kalasin.Thank you for… _everything.”_

Strong but tiny arms banded around her neck, Alex very sure she was about to die via spider monkey.

And well, she was pretty ok with that now. __

~*~

When Astra came to her, finally after weeks of her hiding away from the world, Alex expected her to ask after Kalasin.That wasn’t what she had come for.

She smiled kindly at the child, and even offered a hug and a kiss but her real objective was made clear when Kalasin raced off to her room to grab her coloring book.She wanted to show off for her great aunt.

“We will give Mon-El his rights tomorrow; I thought you would like to attend.”

The words made the cement block that Alex had been holding on her shoulder, sink to her stomach.The weight of her losses suddenly making her legs shake as her knees threatened to buckle under the pressure.

“Yes.”She had said.“Just give me a time.”She pulled a hand through her hair, picking at her nail beds as she struggled with her composure.“He had friends… family at the alien bar.Can I…?

“Of course.”Astra had permitted before taking off again.Kalasin had returned to see her flying out the window, her small face pinched in sadness.

Alex hated seeing her sad, so she’d bribed her with a trip to the aquarium, keeping a close eye on her as she pressed her small face against the glass of a tank full of piranhas.With Kalasin distracted, Alex could let her mind wander, could remember Mon-El and her last words to him.

**_It’s not just a heist.It’s an incredibly important mission that I wouldn’t trust you to be a part of even if you were sober._ **

How arrogant she had been; so sure, that she’d known the Daxamite and his limits.Showed what she knew.

**_Fuck ups get lucky sometimes.I can’t count on luck anymore.You can’t be a part of this._ **

Fuck ups indeed.

Kitai had given them a breakdown of what had happened, and a smattering of other aliens and metas in their group who had seen him.There had been reports from civilians who had been saved by him, camera footage…

Mon-El had rescued countless people that day, and, in protecting Jon and Kalasin, had been critically injured.He hadn’t told anyone; had kept fighting and gone on to clear a path for Kara to break through to the Galactoid making him instrumental in the world saving maneuver.

It wouldn’t have mattered if he’d stopped for medical attention anyway, not without access to the sun.Alex had seen his injuries and he had had a huge chunk of his flank and torso ripped out.Not even accounting for the blood loss, the infection due to exposure and the poison from the Hellgrammite would have finished him soon after.He’d been dead, and he’d known it and he’d continued to try to save Earth.

And she’d called him a fuck up.

Stepping onto the rooftop that Astra had procured for the ceremony, the remaining patrons of the alien bar, M’gann, and Alex’s own family behind her, she felt her throat close up.

There was a small queue as the remaining Kryptonian’s that hadn’t followed Non, five in total, paid their last respects, touching a hand to the crest of their house before touching Mon-El’s sigil on his chest.The Last Son of Daxam.

The other guests came after, and, when it was Alex’s turn, she paused to take him in; his too still face, mouth that had always been set in a grin now smoothed over in a thin line.This wasn’t him; this was not Mon-El. Inhaling sharply she placed her hand on his cold one and leaned close to him to whisper “I love you, you jerk”, before taking a place to the side.

Astra gestured Clark forward, handing him a piece of metal that Clark heated with his eyes.The red metal was then pressed to Mon-El’s forehead, so that Rao would know his child when he returned home.As the eldest Kryptonian female in attendance, Astra led the funeral rites stepping away from the body with a simple “walk in peace” when she was done.

And then Clark lit up the base of the sheet with his heat vision, the body catching fire quickly as two male Kryptonians carried the pyre into the sky.

Clark pulled Jonathan back to his chest, his hand resting on his son’s shoulder while M’gann, standing next to him cried into J’onn’s shoulder.

Kitai was holding Kalasin, singing to her softly in Kryptonian, the song being picked up by the remnants of her planet as they sent Mon-El on his final walk.

Alex doesn't bother asking why they weren't sending Kara off with him.While humans could send off their dead without a body, Kryptonian's could not.

And Alex had seen what happened; had watched when the coal black sky was suddenly inundated with purple fire.The sounds had been horrible.She’d known then that there wouldn't be a body.Kara _couldn't_ be sent back to Rao; she'd never see her family again.

She'd be alone.

Seemed a stupid way to go.

Astra stood next to Alex, her entire body screaming exhaustion, her eyes trained on the red speck in the sky.“We didn’t always burn the bodies you know?”She confided, voice hollow. “We used to preserve them, make use of it…Jor-El had the brain of one of the greatest minds of our kind trapped in a jar on his desk.The science to do so is gone now, but even if it were not… I want to rest Brave One.When my time comes… make sure I have the chance to rest.”

Unable to do anything but swallow the hard lump in her throat and bite the corner of her lip, Alex nodded her acquiescence.She watched through blurry eyes as her friend was taken into Rao’s light.She hoped he’d find his loved ones there; his lost friends and family.He deserved to finally have a home.

Jerks with hearts.

She imagined Kara holding her from behind, the feel of her arms still ingrained in Alex’s memory.

It was both a blessing and the worst curse she could have brought upon herself but at least this way Kara had her.

 

~*~

“What made you not give up before?”Jon asked as they set up Alex’s new gaming consoles on the sparkling new 75” TV that Felicity insisted she had to have.“When you were looking for my cousin Aunt.”

Jon had called Kara his cousin Aunt since he was about 6 and Alex had confided that she’d been in love with the Kryptonian.

_“She’s my cousin cause of dad,” he’d reasoned, “but she’s my aunt because of you.You’re my aunt and you love her so she’s my aunt too.”_

Alex hadn’t had the heart to tell him that that wasn’t how it worked.

Sighing she plugged the HDMI cord into the back of her Xbox, setting the console on the first shelf of her entertainment unit.

“She was… I don’t know.I just hoped, I guess. I loved her, and I’d made a promise.”

Jon chewed his lip as he set a remote in it’s appropriate docking station.“You made a promise to me.”

“I know... I just… don’t feel much like celebrating Thumper.Maybe next year, yeah?”She ruffled his hair and he ducked below her hand obviously still disappointed that his birthday planning was for naught.

Upstairs they heard a thump and a small ‘yip’, Wren’s signal that Kalasin was in distress. Jon sped off upstairs to settle Kalasin and help her through the bouts of anxiety that sometimes happened in her therapy sessions.Alex strained her ears to listen for further conflict but a few minutes later Jon was speeding back down and resuming his previous activities.He took Doctor-Patient confidentiality very seriously.Plus, Alex was fairly certain he had a crush on Harley.Which was really weird and creepy and she was definitely going to let Lois handle that one.

“But why?” Jon insisted like they had never been interrupted, even though there was a wet stain on his chest that Alex assumed was from Kalasin’s tears.She hated the thought of the girl crying but also realized she couldn’t offer herself as a crutch if Kalasin was going to get better.Really, truly better.“I know you’re sad, but you were sad back then and you didn’t give up.”

“Well yeah but—”

“But what?”

Pinching the bridge of her nose, Alex exhaled slowly.“When I was a kid, I thought Kryptonian’s were invulnerable Jon.I thought your dad was… infallible.That he’d live forever powered by the light of the sun.It might be that that is entirely possible, but there are still things out there that can hurt him.Things that hurt Kara and Kalasin.I was just too stupid to realize how badly that could go.It wasn’t hope that kept me going it was ignorance.”

She scoffed at her idiocy now.She’d been naïve to think that she and Kara would have any sort of happy ending.Stupid even.

Those things didn’t exist.

“You’re a dumbass.”Jon concluded after a long moment, nodding to himself as he started bedazzling a purple controller in his quest to win ‘cousin of the year award’.Again, Alex hadn’t had to heart to tell him that that was not a thing.

She whipped around at his blasé statement, fighting between being amused, proud, and insulted.“ _Excuse me?”_

“What?”Jon asked innocently, his first smiley face forming on the left grip.“You are.That’s a stupid thing to think.I mean, I know the _rest_ of the world thinks Dad is some immortal god but you’ve seen him as he is.You’ve seen him trip. _You’ve_ tripped him.”

Rolling her eyes, Alex flicked the boy’s ear.“No cursing ‘til you’re at least 14.And just because your dad is a loser doesn’t mean he’s not immortal.”I mean, it’s not like Alex had ever actually spoken to Kal about it but still…possible.

“Yeah,” Jon argued pausing in his bedazzling for a moment.“But it doesn’t mean he _is_ either.You said we get our energy from the sun, that we’re like batteries, right?”

“With an endless supply of power.”Alex reminded returning his steady gaze.

“But batteries die.”Jon’s eyes were intense, the brown irises locking on Alex’s and keeping her captive.“Power sources _die._ Over time, our bodies will hold less and less solar energy until we have nothing.”Alex felt herself tense, for some reason never having considered _that_ line of logic.And for it to have come from _Jon…_ She shifted, unsure how to ask if he was ok when he shrugged, face turning nonchalant as he stuck a bright blue gem to the thumb stick.“Or the sun will explode.Whichever comes first.”

Shaking her head, Alex uncertainly went back to her former task of shelving.“You’re a weird kid you know? _Smart…_ but really weird.”

Jon sent her a beaming smile.“I take my lead from you.”Alex sent him a wry smile and started towards the kitchen to make lunch, Jon’s soft voice making her freeze mid step.“She might be ok you know?We may not be immortal, but we come back.Our family comes back sometimes…”

Alex clenched her fists, the ache she had tried not to focus on nearly making her pass out.When she had control of herself, she coughed and shook her head, continuing to the fridge and pulling out the necessary ingredients for grilled cheese sandwiches.

It had taken some physical therapy sessions, but Kalasin had slowly learned how to eat solid foods.An unnecessary requirement by CADMUS standards.

“Not this time kid but thank you.I appreciate you trying to cheer me up.”

Jon abandoned the controller and stood to help Alex, wrapping his small arms around her waist in a tight hug.“I just want you to be happy.”

“I am happy,” She admonished gently, lips pressing to the crown of his head.“I’ve got my best friend in the _whole world_ as my personal assistant.This is the best day of my life.Now go slice the cheese.”

She shoved him away gently and he laughed, a companionable silence falling over them as they put together a stack of sandwiches.

“Alex?” Jon asked as the pan startled to sizzle with melted cheese.“What’s infallible?”His tongue tripped over the word and she smiled, flipping the finished sandwich onto a plate.

“It means, incapable of making mistakes.Never being wrong.Use it in a sentence.”

Jon’s face pinched in thought but instead of their usual banter he looked up at Alex with a question.“Was Kara infallible?”

There was a sweetness to her ache this time as she thought of all the times, she and Kara had gotten it wrong.

“No.”She concluded, plating the last sandwich as Kalasin, Wren, and Harley appeared on the landing. “But she was pretty damn close.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That wasn't so bad was it? Thoughts? 
> 
> Maggie woke up so that was a good thing and she got to marry the love of her life, Kate Kane. They will both heal fully and live happily ever after and take Alex on their honeymoon so that she's not too in her own head.
> 
> I know I didn't mention Beastboy but honestly I forgot about him until it was too much of a hassle to add in his condition so he's fine. Small concussion, he's recovering with Raven. They will both heal with no long term issues.
> 
> Oliver got his mechanical arm, Lucy will one day regain feeling in her legs with Alex's help, and Winn and Felicity are both ok.
> 
> Katu not so much. She spent her imprisonment thinking of everything she was going to do *with* Kara, she didn't sign on for a life without her. So for the moment she is AWOL.
> 
> Fiora and Bob died and the feelings from the alien camp were neither completely right nor wrong. Alex wasn't at fault for getting their families and friends put away for life, but she did help catch them. She's not the law but she's the nearest thing they have so she's the bad guy. Shitty situation plus they probably think she could do more on behalf of their kind. Fight for them in a sense. I see that more as a Lucy thing though, especially since Alex is barely holding her shit together. She'll be ok.
> 
> Mon-El is dead and I am actually sad about it because his funeral scene was super emotional to write. RIP dude. He was a good guy. I took the funeral partly from Smallville (a show I have never seen outside of research for this) and partly from Supergirl. 
> 
> So obviously the loss of Kara is being felt in everyone here and I'm not really sure how to comment on it except that everyone is just really trying to pick up the pieces. For Alex especially this is huge. In Chapter One we saw very clearly that she didn't do attachments and now she's got Kalasin and Wren to care for and will be opening a clinic/hospital for aliens. She is also very clearly reaching out to her friends and family for help in dealing with her pain and she's still going to AA and therapy. She's doing everything right. It was also really important to me to show that she wasn't going to pick up ASL right away and there would be some conflict that came with it. Adopting anyone isn't easy but adopting a special needs child is definitely something with unique challenges. For both parties. That Alex didn't give up when it got hard or uncomfortable... just so proud of our girl. One of the things I wanted to do when I started this was have a full and complete character arc and dammit I think I've done it. I'm really proud of me. You guys are probably really angry at me but I can take my lumps.
> 
> Kalasin and Jon are now besties as are Kalasin and Wren AND Kalasin is now codenamed Stitch. Jon may or may not be jealous that Alex nicknamed someone other than him.
> 
> I really wanna hug Astra.
> 
> Kitai is a fucking gem of a human being.
> 
> Cat Grant is life.
> 
> And I will leave you with this quote for the next day or two: "Things never happen the same way twice dear one."


	25. There's Still Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The chapter in which Chronicle's hopefully finds redemption :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiya everybody! So I just wanted to thank you for the lack of death threats! That was nice. I mean there was one odd demon summoning but I'm pretty sure my Cat is from the underworld so that may have just been a fan tryna plan a family reunion.
> 
> I know I'm behind on my comment responses but between editing this and real life I've been a little swamped and I thought you'd prefer a chapter rather than reading any additional commentary I make. Hopefully I will get to them soon though as I read and appreciate every single one of them. Plus it's election day here in the states and voter suppression is real. Took me two hours to case a ballot. If you are in the States, please don't forget to vote.
> 
> You are special. You're the only one...
> 
> Anyway song is the same from last time. It's the story title You Wouldn't Like Me- Sleeping At Last. 
> 
> Full song lyric is Don't You Worry There's Still Time

** There’s Still Time **

The DEO clinic had been opened for almost a week now and Alex had quickly developed a love/hate relationship with it.

When she had first started almost two weeks ago, they place had been spotless; pristine.She’d fucked that up real quick.Working with aliens told her that _sterile_ equated with things like _evil fucking Luthor bitch… and son._

She’d employed Ni to redecorate and the place had turned into a color vomit maelstrom.Like a Moroccan tea room, met Hindu wedding, met Kalasin’s coloring book.It was a lot of color but somehow… it fit.The Krishar was still reeling from the death of her friend, Fiora’s last remaining children, Wren and Hiccup, helping Ni establish an actual alien housing community instead of just a tent city.Without Bob there to protect them, Yreifpkl had established a neighborhood watch and was in talks with the local NCPD precinct as they started negotiations for citizenship.It was not smooth sailing by any stretch of the imagination, but it was more than enough for now.

When Lena had stopped by, she’d taken one look around, rolled her lips to hide her amusement and handed Alex an extremely large heavy box.

“The installers will be here this afternoon to mount it, but I wanted to make sure it got here safe.”

Alex had given her a skeptical look but dutifully pulled at the strings binding the paper wrapping together.“Lena, I’m flattered really but I’m still nursing a bruised ego and Lucy is tiny enough to sneak up on both of us in our sleep.”

Lena rolled her eyes.“We both know it wasn’t _you_ I was interested in Agent Danvers.”Alex had a biting remark on the tip of her tongue but the metal plaque that she unveiled had her choking on it.“I thought it was right she be remembered.That they all were.We owe all of this to them, they shouldn’t just go down as nameless faces and species.Felicity and I are planning a more permanent structure in the middle of National City.We’ll list their home worlds there.”

Tracing her fingers over the raised image, Alex found it exceedingly difficult to think.A likeness of Kara stood in the foreground, it’s image bland enough that no one would be able to say she looked any different from your average white woman.But Alex would know.And the crest of the House of El stamped on her chest would make sure the world knew.Next to her were Mon-El and Bob, and Fiora; the frontline of the defense against ALFA.

Then next to it were their names; the names of all of the fallen who had been reported thus far.First names only, Alex noticed; to protect their families.

It would protect Kalasin.

“They were soldiers.”Lena said quietly.“They deserve to be honored as such.”

Alex blinked back tears, stroking Kara’s face one more time before replacing the paper.“I hate you.”

Lena had smiled and then the CEO had started to help Alex with her last-minute changes.

Cat Grant herself had been present for their grand opening and subsequent dedication of the clinic/hospital to the fallen soldiers.She’d given a speech in Alex’s stead and Alex had actually agreed with everything she’d had to say.

Plot twist.

After, when the press storm had died down and she had been able to say a quiet thanks to the woman, Cat had turned to her, a slightly surprised but pleased look on her face.“You certainly have grown haven’t you.”

Alex had shrugged.“I had some help.”

“Yes.” Cat agreed, voice choked in less than a moment.“Yes, you did.”The older woman had taken a step back to look at the simple clinic, a soft smile coming to her lips.“She would have loved this.”

“Yeah.”Alex agreed willing herself not to cry.

Cat had left shortly after and it had just been Alex and Ni and their staff waiting for their first patient.

No one came.

Not that Alex blamed them; trust was still a fragile thing between humans and aliens.Coming to a public place and proclaiming your need for help sounded very much like a trap.So, they had gone patient less for the first few days and Alex had been bored out of her mind.

Until she wasn’t.

The dinging of the elevator on their 8th day of operation brought Alex out of her rather epic trashcan basketball game.She was winning.Against herself.

Ni had been in the corner, knitting Alex _another_ scarf, Kalasin’s already laid out next to her.

An elderly woman had stepped off the lift and their receptionist, a short Carnorian named Steve, had greeted her.Things became very messy after that.

The woman had removed her _face,_ and Steve had let out a deep screech from his trunk like nose that shook the floors before scurrying under his table.Alex, believing they were under attack, had drawn her gun, which had made the woman scream bloody murder, the sides of her face opening to reveal rows and rows of tiny teeth.

Only Ni stepping in the way and hissing at the woman in her clacking language had eased the tension.Alex’s eyes wide and her ears ringing as she tried to understand if she was about to be eaten alive or not.

“You!”Ni hissed, turning to her.“Put that away _now!_ This is a place of healing; you should be ashamed of yourself.”

Alex had balked but obeyed the command.“She was gonna eat Steve!”

Ni waved an impatient hand, tugging the woman over to one of their yarn dressed cots.“Steve is, as you say, a chicken, he will scream when he sees an Ewok.Madam K’les has a right to remove her face when she wants.”

“Oh, of course.”

Alex had learned that the woman was suffering from several bone fractures in her legs and arms.How she was even walking was a mystery, but she had been terrified of coming in for treatment for fear of being deported.Alex could understand that and while she and Ni came up with a care plan that would not require her to stay or even come in frequently, she mulled over how to make aliens more comfortable.

“It will just take time.”Ni had insisted, pulling off her yarn sheets and setting them on fire.Steve scurried over in his suit with a fire extinguisher, pulling the nozzle to put out the flames.His little body went flying back and Alex quickly grabbed the cannister to stop the spray.

“If there are more aliens out there that need help, we need to go to them.We can’t just wait around for ‘time’.Time is stupid and mean, we’ll make our own thank you very much.”

Ni’s smile had split her face in half.

Literally.

They’d taken one of the DEO vans and outfitted it with everything they needed.Alex had left behind her interns and she, Ni, and Steve had started traversing the streets of National city for injured or sick aliens and metas.

Surprisingly there had only been one instance in which Alex had questioned her decision to help in this manor; one time where the bad outweighed the good.

It had started as a normal day, her and Ni driving through the neighborhoods looking for people in need.It had been a setup from the start.A teenage El-Aurian beaten to within an inch of his life and left in the back of an alley.Alex had run in head first like always, Ni following behind and helping her apply pressure to an abdominal stab wound on the young boy.They had been minutes away from having the bleeders covered when all of Alex’s survival instincts had kicked in, causing her to spin low on her ankle and turn to stare into the barrel of a gun.

Not even a cool gun.A fucking old ass shotgun.Like that shit you saw in a Clint Eastwood movie.

What the fuck.

The asshole holding the weapon smiled at her, unexceptional in every way.The standard dark jeans, white tank top, and skin head tattoo unfortunately outing him as the extremist he apparently was.And now, this lame ass white boy was seconds away from blowing Alex’s head off and he was just out of arm’s reach!

Fucker.

She saw him pull the trigger before she heard the echoing gunshot, her eyes closing as her body tried to reflexively protect itself.

Kitai cut the bullet from midair with her sword, a gleeful smile on her face as she stared down Alex’s attacker.

“It seems as if I have … bit the bullet.”The Kryptonian’s smile grew, the assailant staring at her dumbfounded as Alex fought not to facepalm.Kitai looked back and forth between them like they were all friends.“Do you get it?Because I literally cut the bullet—”

“Did Winn show you that stupid joke book?”Alex asked, recovering and easily disarming the bad guy while Ni continued to aid the alien teen.

“No.”Kitai said, huffing an ice blast at the man when he threw a punch at Alex.“Felicity did.”

“Oh, of course.”Tall, white and ugly got body slammed to the ground and Alex used the tourniquets she had brought out to tie his hands together.“Well, just for future reference, no one finds Felicity funny.You might want to watch real stand-up comedians or maybe even satire films to develop your sense of humor.”

Kitai nodded seriously and hefted the man onto her shoulder.“I will do this.Felicity has set me up with a ‘Netflix’ account.She has mentioned many humorous movies.”She nodded at Alex briskly and took off towards the nearest NCPD precinct before Alex could warn her that watching Monty Python did _not_ qualify as humor development.

It had been a lost cause in the end, it seemed Kitai’s sense of humor had turned into finding every terrible, unfunny joke that was ever created and forcing them on whoever crossed her path just so she could see their reaction.Their pain was her amusement.Felicity had created a monster.

Fortunately, that had been the only time Kitai had not stopped a criminal _before_ they could attack Alex or Ni.She had taken to listening more closely and not allowing them to draw a weapon which Alex appreciated tremendously.

Her days had been extremely long and busy since.

But the lives she had changed, the people she was helping…

She could practically _feel_ Kara’s happiness.

Making Kara happy had always made Alex happy.

She just hoped that one day, she’d be able to think of the woman without the accompanying feelings of pain.

~*~

Alex grumbled as she clumsily felt along her nightstand for her buzzing phone.She didn’t even know what time it was, just that it felt like she’d barely fallen asleep when the damn thing had started ringing.If this was Selina again…

The Sirens staying in town had been a great comfort for Kalasin, the girl having grown quite fond of the group of women and followed Harley around like an imprinted duckling.For Alex however, their antics had been nothing but a nuisance.A distracting nuisance but still…

The only other person it might be would be Astra asking her how to work her Netflix account again.

Regardless of the interruption, Alex was well aware it was something that could have easily waited for morning and so when she spoke her voice reflected her annoyance.

“The fuck do you want?”Next to her, Wren grumbled and rolled off the bed to go join Kalasin in hers, the traitor.There was a short pause, where only the sound of the other person’s breathing came through and it made Alex bury her head further in her pillow.“Seriously?You want to prank call someone in the middle of the fucking night?”

“No! I—” The soft voice cut off, Alex blinking her eyes open at the sound, a weird pressure forming in her chest as the woman took a deep breath to re-center herself.“Do you remember in Harry Potter when he went to face off against Voldemort?And then Voldemort cast the Avada Kedavra and he killed him, and Harry saw Dumbledore and the Hogwarts Express and… and he came back?He actually lived?”

Alex was fully awake now, having pushed herself into a sitting position somewhere in the middle of the speech.Her mouth opening and closing as her brain tried to figure out the logistics of such a call.

“Alex?”The voice prompted, “are you still there?”

She pressed a shaky hand against her mouth, elbows propped on her knees, and had to make several attempts at speech before her words moved passed the lump in her throat.“How… Where are you right now?”

“A bus stop.There’s… it says Rosenburg Terminal, Mr. Matthews said this was as close as he could get me to National City…”There was another sharp inhale where Alex could imagine her tugging at her hair or biting her lip in agitation, before the woman she had believed to be dead tried speaking again.“I’m really sorry to be calling so late, I just—yours was the only number I remembered, and I don’t really have any… abilities right now.”

“No.”Already moving for her pants, Alex hopped around the room in an attempt to get into them as quickly and quietly as possible.She hopped herself into their semi completed living room where Selina was passed out on her couch and flicked on the light as she tried to locate her boots.Selina hissed as the bright light hit her and yanked the blanket over her head.“No, its fine.I’m just—wait Mr. Matthews?”

“Yeah,” there was the sound of heavy wind through the line and when Alex looked outside her window, she saw it was raining quite profusely.She grabbed a few towels and a blanket from the closet before reconsidering and also taking one of her band hoodies.“I met him at the hospital and he was going the same way I was so—"

“Stop.Just—Stay where you are ok?I’m coming.I’m gonna come get you.”Boots on, Alex walked quickly towards the door, fishing her keys out of the bowl with shaky hands.Artax flit next to her, bobbing in midair as he undoubtedly listened to the call.“No more accepting rides from strange men… or strange anybody.I’ll be there as soon as I can.Are you inside?”

“Um, kind of?”

Alex shook her head, hand jotting a quick note to her mother saying where she was going but not why.She’d explain everything once she got there.“I’ll be there soon.”

She waited for the ok before hanging up and turning to the Kryptonian AI.“How far away can I be for you to run a DNA scan.”

Artax sniffed, popped out a cylinder from his torso, and waited for her to take it.“With this, I can read DNA results from roughly 2,000 lightyears away.”

Alex nodded, ignoring the Kryptonian’s usual disdain, pocketing the device and heading to the door.“Stay here, watch Kalasin.Take her to Sanctuary if I’m not back in three hours or if you feel even a hint of danger.”

“Robots do not feel Agent.”

Alex was already out the door, jogging to the car and just as quickly dialing J’onn and explaining the situation to him while she also patched in Winn.Both men had been at the DEO and so had been awake, thank goodness, and it took Winn little time to pull up the nearest camera feed.Alex was already well on her way by that point, having borrowed her mother’s rental car (a tiny Ford Focus) and putting her phone on the provided cell phone holder.The video was grainy and distorted by the rain but there was clearly a lone figure at a bus terminal, hunkered over on themselves as the storm lashed around them.It was clear that the individual was not inside and given that it was nearing 3AM, Alex figured that the station itself was closed and so the woman she had been speaking to had had little else to shelter themselves than the poorly illuminated portico.

J’onn was flying to meet her en-route but Alex already knew she wouldn’t wait for him.It had taken a lot just to remember to call him and only her new responsibilities as Kalasin’s guardian had reminded her to do so.She couldn’t leave the child an orphan a second time, so she wouldn’t rush headlong into danger without backup.J’onn would just have to be quick; because if this was real…

If this was…

She flicked the heat up in the car, her wipers moving rapidly over the windshield as she maneuvered the car down the dark streets.It was almost an hour drive outside of the city, and Alex managed to make it there in 40 minutes.J’onn was not happy but at least Winn had hacked CCTV and kept her informed of traffic conditions and oncoming vehicles.She would have run more than one red light if Winn hadn’t been switching them all to green for her.

She really loved the little man.

When she reached the bus stop, she pulled in as close to the portico as possible and drew her gun, the bullet in the chamber a general taser ballistic that they had tested against a multitude of species.It wouldn’t kill anyone, but it would hurt them enough for Alex to change to a better ammunition choice.

Winn stayed on comm’s, ever aware of whatever danger might be lurking around so that he could alert Alex immediately.

J’onn was hovering back, acting as her backup should things go awry.The caller wouldn’t know he was there unless they tried something untoward.

And Alex…

Alex wasn’t sure what she was feeling.There was a terror hammering in her chest that made her hyperaware of everything.The tightness of her leather jacket almost suffocating into the humid heat of her car.She’d dreamed about this moment for _weeks—_ prayed for it!And now… now she just wanted to go home and hide under a blanket somewhere; pretend this never happened, that she had never gotten the call.

She stepped out of the car, keys in hand as she cautiously raised her gun to the lone figure backed up against the wall.Heavy water droplets had her quickening her pace before she could become fully soaked but even so, the cold downpour had her blinking liquid out of her eyes as the person stepped into the light.

Alex’s finger tightened on the trigger and she clenched her jaw.

In front of her, Kara pushed rain-soaked hair out of her eyes and offered her a nervous smile.“Hello.”

Alex was silent, unsure of the protocol that came when your dead ex-girlfriend came back to life.

Kara took a step toward her and Alex took a step back, suddenly afraid and clumsy in her movements.

“Alex… I can’t even imagine what you must be thinking.I… I don’t know what happened.I woke up maybe a week after—”

“Stick out your tongue.”The words startled them both, but Alex forced herself to remain steady, for her hands to stop shaking.She had to make sure.She had to know _for sure!_

Kara startled.“What?I don’t—”

“Stick it out!”

Kara did, and Alex shifted the keys to her gun hand to pull Artax’s metal cylinder from her jacket.Pressing a button on the shaft made a long cotton swap extend from the top and Alex quickly swiped at the inside of Kara’s mouth.The swab retracted, and the cylinder beeped.

“Artax?”

Kara shifted her weight and Alex took another step away from her, shaking now that she was in such close proximity to the other woman.

“ _It is a match Agent.That is the Great Scion.”_

Breathing had become difficult and it took Alex a second to realize she was crying.Her gun arm dropped to her side, fingers barely holding onto the metal as she took in the woman in front of her.Her girl.

Kara.

Kara was alive.

Kara. Kara. Kara.

“I didn’t cheat.”The blonde whispered, taking a step closer to Alex.One that Alex did not take a step away from.“That day we played hide-and-seek.That’s what I thought about when I—You just have a really loud heartbeat and I followed it to you and I won fair and square.”Another step.“And then… I claimed my prize.”

Alex grabbed Kara by her soaked through t-shirt, tugging the blonde into her arms and digging her fingers into her back.Kara carefully maneuvered the gun out of Alex’s hand and back into Alex’s side holster, offering no complaint when the woman’s grip tightened.

The first thing Alex noticed was that she smelled different.Like rain, earth and antiseptic, which meant she had been out here for a while and at a hospital of some kind before that; she was also dressed in clothing almost three times too big for her, the wet t-shirt clinging to her thin frame almost indecent at this point.

The second thing she noticed was that Kara was short one arm, which was another reason the t-shirt was dangling precariously off one shoulder.Alex allowed her fingers to gently touch the area, before trailing up Kara’s neck to her jaw and finally her face, bringing their eyes together for the first time since…

“Found you.”Kara murmured, bony fingers clenching in the fabric of Alex’s shirt.

Alex could only shake her head in wonder, completely amazed at the miracle before her.“How?”

Kara bit her lip, her remaining arm resting on Alex’s hip.“I don’t know… I guess I just thought I should be the one to come after you this time.”The blonde shifted, her eyes darting to the floor in that way Alex had always hated; the way that meant she thought her words were going to be received negatively and she was bracing for impact.“I’m sorry it took me so long but to be fair I was waiting for _you_ for almost ten years.I should have been way more impatient with you when we met up again but I didn’t remember everything then… I think I do now.”

Alex kissed her and Kara gasped, dropping her self-consciousness to respond enthusiastically, if a little sluggishly.

Alex didn’t mind, she had enough energy for the both of them.She cupped the back of Kara’s head, hands tangling in clumps of knotted wet hair as she pulled her more firmly against her.Kara moaned, her fingers digging into the small of Alex’s back, body trembling in the cold night despite the heat of the kiss.

Cold, Alex thought idly… It was raining.Kara was _soaked._

_ Fuck. _

Alex pulled away, pressing a short kiss to Kara’s lips when they chased after her own, and sliding a palm into Kara’s hand, noticing immediately that it too was wrapped in bandages.

“Come on.I have the heat going in the car, and there are blankets.Let’s get you warmed up.”

Kara gave her a shaky nod, and Alex led her to the vehicle.J’onn was already in the driver’s seat, transformed as a smaller version of his Martian form so that he could fit in the tiny car and also, so he wouldn’t have to take on the Henshaw persona in front of Kara.It was a good move on all counts as Alex had no desire to frighten her girl, and absolutely no desire to drive now that Kara was back in her arms.She pulled them into the back seat, the moment feeling surreal as she helped Kara towel dry her hair and wrapped her in blankets.The blankets kept slipping and when Kara tried to hold them together with her right hand, her balance was thrown off enough that she listed to her left.

Alex propped her up, pulling the Kryptonian close and keeping an arm wrapped tight around her waist.“It’s ok.” She murmured, “I’ll make you a new one.I promise.”

Kara didn’t say anything, just burrowed deeper into Alex’s warmth as the agent rubbed at her arm and back to try to stimulate more blood flow.After a moment she plucked at Kara’s t-shirt.

“Take this off.”To her credit, Kara barely spared J’onn a glance simply complying with Alex’s wishes and sighing in relief when Alex helped her into the hoodie she had brought from home.There were scratches and bruises all over Kara’s torso, but nothing life threatening.“The pants too please.”

Kara wiggled out of the sweatpants easily, and Alex draped one of the blankets over her lap, before once again pulling her close and tucking Kara’s cold face into her neck.

“Where have you been?”Alex asked, feeling desperate and wired and _needy._

“Honduras?”Kara muttered, “I’m pretty sure… it was a mountain at first and the people there helped me through my withdrawal.”

“Withdrawal?”The wipers thumped softly as J’onn drove them home, his silence unassuming and allowing Alex to keep her wits about her.“Withdrawal from what?”

“I have no idea.”Kara admitted, voice getting sleepier.“Whatever CADMUS gave me probably…Alex, Kalasin?”

“She’s fine.”The former agent assured.“She’s been staying with me and she’s… she’s good Kara.I promise.”

Kara hummed and was silent for the rest of the ride.Not because Alex had finished asking her questions, but because she was very clearly fighting sleep.Alex spent the rest of the ride just drinking in her features and trying to stop herself from getting too excited.No way this came without consequences.She needed to think; needed a level head.

There were bruises under Kara’s eyes, and her hair hung in a disorganized mess of wet clumps and what may have once been a braid.She had more weight on her than she had after CADMUS but not much and her nails were dry and brittle.Which meant malnourishment; exhaustion; possible dehydration.Specter’s didn’t experience any of those things; as terrible as it was that mean that gave her hope that this was real.That this was something she could work with.Something she could fix.

Which is why when J’onn pulled up to the DEO she had originally been very appreciative.Until she realized what that meant.

The Martian had turned to her, his hands out and spread open when Kara had blinked her eyes open and seen the building.It was too late, the look on the blonde’s face would forever be ingrained in Alex’s skull.The resignation; the despair.

“She is injured.”J’onn argued, his hand motioning to the building.“You have a clinic where you could treat her; run your own tests; make sure everything checks out.”

Alex had pulled Kara closer to her, eyes glaring even though she _knew_ that J’onn would never hurt either of them.“She’s not going in a cell. _I’m_ going to check her out and then _we_ are going home.”

J’onn nodded.“Whatever you think is best.”

And so, she and Kara had shuffled out of the tiny car, Kara holding the blanket tight around her waist like a sarong, and Alex had taken her upstairs to the clinic.No one was there at this time of night, they hadn’t quite reached the level of funding, staffing, or _demand_ that required them to stay open full time but maybe someday.

Kara had glanced around at the odd decorations, a small smile on her face.“Ni?”

Nodding, Alex steered her towards a bed and directed her to sit down.“I insisted.”She pulled out a small syringe, intent on taking a blood sample when she suddenly found herself immobile looking at Kara in a sudden panic.The blonde quirked her eyebrow, biting her lip to appease her anxiety.

This was so unreal.It actually felt like one of those dream sequences Alex had seen in Star Wars, where dead Jedi came back to taunt their padawans.Except Star Wars wasn’t _real_ and Kara really looked like she was.Like maybe the past few weeks Alex had spent in agony had been for nothing.But there was also a hollowness there.She knewwhat she _should_ be feeling but the adrenaline pumping through her made it hard for her to _actually_ feel anything.She could barely feel the syringe in her hands.Everything was just so bizarre.

Still, she had fucked this all up the last time they had been reunited.Real or not she wasn’t going to do that again.Even if she woke up later and found out this had all been some cruel dream, she would know that Kara understood how she’d felt.That at least in her dreams, Kara knew her heart.

“I love you.”Alex blurted, licking her lips, eyes blown wide as words spilled from her mouth.“I want… I want to be with you and I love you.I need you to know that.That I am _in_ love with you.Because I’m pretty sure you’re my soulmate and I don’t ever want to be apart from you again.”Kara’s jaw dropped, and her eyes went wide but there was a pleased smile forming on her face that made Alex’s stomach flutter and her heart grow in confidence.“I know that’s a lot.We haven’t seen each other in… and I thought you were dead but—I didn’t say it last time.I had the chance to say it and I didn’t because I thought I’d have more time and I didn’t, and it became a really rushed stupid goodbye instead but now… Now I need you to know.I don’t ever want you to doubt my intentions.”Kara was now biting her lip to hide her joy and Alex jutted her chin out in the last show of defiance to her fear.“I’m going to marry you one day…”She blushed, and her confidence evaporated like a cloud of smoke making her eyes drop to her feet in mortification. _Consent Alex!_ “If that’s ok with you.”

Several minutes of silence passed, before a soft whisper interrupted her self-flagellation.

“Ok.”

“Ok?” Startled, she looked up at Kara in question.

“Yes.”Kara stated, her smile now so large it could illuminate a city on its brightness alone.“Ok.”

“Ok.” Alex confirmed with her own grin, a confused confidence settling into her bones as she moved to draw her sample.Kara let her but didn’t take her eyes off of Alex who moved to put a blood pressure cuff on her next.

Once Alex had jotted down her reading, she pressed her stethoscope to Kara’s chest, and then around to her back.Kara leaned in, their temples brushing and making the moment more intimate as the Kryptonian softly inhaled her scent.

“Deep breath.”Alex ordered gently.

Kara complied and, on her exhale, softly whispered, “just Alex… I love you too.”

Alex tried not to let her heart combust with joy.

~*~

Kara fought not to shiver as Alex trailed her cold fingers across her abdomen, her stethoscope pressing to Kara’s skin as she listened for any abnormalities.

“Everything looks good.”Alex murmured, her eyes darting back for the umpteenth time to the screens behind Kara’s head.The screens that had triple checked her identity.Her human was still just as paranoid as before.“Are you sure you aren’t in any pain?”

“Nothing that isn’t normal.”Kara confirmed, pulling the hoodie down over her stomach and sitting up.It was more difficult than she had expected with only one arm.CADMUS had taken her arm for upgrades sometimes, but she’d always had her powers to help keep her balance.Now it involved a lot of core work, and her torso was still one big ache from falling out of the sky.From what she remembered, she’d crashed into a mountain and tumbled a lot of the way down before a helpful tree had blocked her momentum.She’d clung to that tree for a few days, unable to move and barely coherent before someone had found her and taken her to help.The rest of the time had passed mostly in a blur, plagued by pain, fever, nightmares, and heartache.By the time she had been well enough to travel it had almost been a month since Brainiac’s power move and she wasn’t even sure if going back was the right thing to do.In the end she’d drawn on Alex’s words, on her pleas that Kara not leave her again; on her promise to Kalasin that she would see her after.Her girls had deserved more than a plaque with a name.Alex gave her an uncomfortable smile and shuffled over to some machinery by the head of the bed.“Just some body aches and bruising that still needs to go down.”

Alex nodded, still not looking at her.“With your solar flare, normal pain medication might work on you.We can try and adjust the dosage as we go.I’m not too concerned with the scrapes though, for someone who crashed into a mountain, you’re pretty spry.”

“They were worse a few weeks ago.”Kara admitted, lifting the sweater so she could check them herself.“Dr. House took out the stitches last week and I started hitchhiking maybe 3 days after that.”

Wrong words.

She’d said the wrong words.

“You had stitches?”Alex asked, her voice carefully steady as she braced her arms on the counter in front of her.

“Yes.” Kara admitted hastily, the hoody once again hiding her blemished flesh.“But I’m healing.Slowly but better than a human.I should be fine in a few more days.It probably only took this long because of the Kryptonite.”

A sharp inhale was her only answer, Alex going back to tinkering with her equipment.

Kara tried to understand the woman in front of her, she really did, but she had just spent the better part of a month unconscious and helpless to her fears.The rest of it had been spent barely functioning because her body had gotten so used to Kryptonite that it didn’t know how to exist without the deadly substance.The only thing that had gotten her through all of that was the thought that she might get a chance to see Kalasin and Alex again.

That just maybe she might still be able to have a family.

And Kara wanted all of it.She knew that she and Alex needed to talk; that they’d both done things to undermine their relationship.That the outside world had done things to undermine their relationship.They had a lot to work on and Kara could already see the fights that they would have; could already map the hurtful accusations Alex would likely hurl when she felt cornered or blindsided.She’d spent her weeks recovering preparing herself for every word, insult, or slur she could imagine.

…And then she’d wiped that all away.

Because a voice that had sounded suspiciously like Katu had whispered that Alex was _not_ CADMUS.

She wasn’t like the rest of the world.

She would never seek to purposefully hurt Kara.Alex had told her as much and she had more than earned Kara’s trust by this point.

So maybe the fighting wouldn’t be crazy, but Kara had heard a lot about makeup sex from Winn and she wanted to try that too.

She also wanted to be _good_ for Alex; wanted to be an equal partner in their relationship.She couldn’t do that as Kara Zor-El.Not yet.

CADMUS had made a past for Linda Taylor; given her degrees and credentials that had allowed her to work at CatCo.But, as far as the world knew, Linda Taylor was an alien terrorist.She couldn’t resume that identity even if she wanted to.

Kara Zor-El didn’t even have an education.

Kara Zor-El had one arm and a questionable moral compass.

Kara Zor-El might never get her powers back…

And Kara Danvers… Kara Danvers had barely made it through a few days of school.

Alex deserved more than that.

She deserved someone who could help her; who she could depend on and not have to carry around all the time.

_ Kalasin  _ deserved more than that.

So, before the makeup sex but after the fighting she would have to find some way to get an identity; an education; a future.

But now Alex was acting all weird and awkward and Kara _couldn’t_ do any of those things if Alex wasn’t willing to meet her halfway.She had _not_ flown herself into outer space all so that Alex could avoid her and treat her like a zorgnat.

Her feet trapped Alex’s leg when the agent stepped back over to remove the sticky pads from her earlier EKG.Kara kept her face smooth and impassive when Alex gave her an unimpressed look.

“Are you angry with me?”

Alex wrinkled her nose, leaning forward to take some stickies from Kara’s rear side.“What could I possibly be angry with you for?”

“Dying.”

Alex snorted and pulled away.

Kara let her.

It wouldn’t do for Alex to feel cornered their first fight.

“You said it yourself.”Alex muttered, dumping the stickies into a trashcan.“You didn’t have a choice.”

“I did though.”Kara waited for Alex to look at her, even though it took several minutes of tense silence.“I chose you.Like I always have.Like I always will.”

“I’m _not_ angry with you.I just—” Alex shrugged, her eyes watering as she took a cautious step towards her.“How much do you remember exactly?”

There was a scar on Alex’s forearm that Kara had been obsessed with when they had been together.It was just slightly raised and so smooth, almost blending in with Alex’s veins in its size and position.

Now Kara reached for it, her fingers tracing the imperfection as she pulled Alex closer to her with her legs, urging the woman into the ‘v’ her thighs created.

“I gave you this scar when we were… 14?There was a car that was on fire and I pulled a woman and her baby out.You got hit by the explosion.I think I cried for a week after.I was so scared.”She pressed a small kiss to the skin before looking to Alex’s bloodshot eyes.

“You were 14.”Alex murmured, voice thick with hurt.“I was almost 16 and… and you only cried for like a day.I was fine.Mom was angrier with me than you anyway.”

Kara wrinkled her nose.“I never thought that was fair—”

Alex kissed her, swallowing her words with her mouth, her hands taking fistfuls of Kara’s hair and holding her head still by the base of her skull.It was everything.

It felt like she’d been on a very long journey and was just now able to rest and find a moment of respite; like coming home.

Alex dragged her tongue through Kara’s mouth and Kara wondered idly at the taste, tried to chase Alex’s tongue with her own so that she could determine the flavors locked away by the woman in her arms.She wanted to know everything.

She had time to know everything now.

“I missed you.”Alex whimpered, tears hot on her cheeks as she continued to plunder Kara’s lips.“I missed you so much I thought I was going to die.”

Brow furrowing, Kara tightened her grip, her one arm banding around Alex’s waist and pulling her close.The absence of her second hand, which she normally would have buried in Alex’s hair, made her ache with want.

“I’m here.I’m right here.”

Alex whimpered again and pressed their mouths together harder, her teeth joining her lips in the kiss.Kara didn’t complain.It hurt a bit, but she’d take any feeling in the world right now if it came from Alex.

Eventually she slowed, Alex pressing soothing pecks to the places she had bruised, her tongue soothing love bites.Kara inhaled shakily and just allowed herself to exist.To be.She had Alex now, the rest of it could wait a bit longer.

Alex pressed a final gentle kiss to Kara’s temple before sinking into her, her face tucked neatly into Kara’s shoulder.When she spoke her words were slow, haltingly pulled from the depths of her heart.“I’m scared.”

Kara could relate; every time she closed her eyes, she was back at CADMUS strapped to that damn chair or laid out on a cold slab of metal.Kara had been living in a perpetual state of fear since she’d been placed in a tiny ship and sent hurtling through space.Her entire life since had been a lesson in hiding; in cowering in the face of her problems rather than facing them head on.When she’d been a shivering, hallucinating _mess_ of a person she had decided that she didn’t want to do that anymore because somehow… she was _alive._ Rao had blessed her with a second opportunity to _live_ and spending even a second more being paralyzed by her terror… well it seemed a waste.

If she had learned anything from her experiences, it was that she couldn’t control her circumstances; life was going to throw out whatever dangers and trials it saw fit.It was her choice whether or not she responded to it with fear.

And Kara was very tired of responding to things with fear.“Me too.”She paused, licked her lips, took a plunge.“But you make me brave.”

Alex’s fingers clenched at her back but before either of them could say any more the elevator dinged, and Winslow Schott Jr. hurried onto the floor, his clothes dripping water as he pushed wet hair from his forehead.

Winn’s eyes were wide, disbelieving before he’d even laid eyes on Kara and his shock didn’t wear off once he actually saw her.

Alex stepped away from her, turning her body away from the man so that she could try to compose herself in private.Kara allowed her the use of one hand, keeping the other trapped in her own.

She waited patiently for Winn to look her over, for his eyes to read the monitors behind her head, for his brain to work and reach conclusions and—

“You died.”

Kara nodded.“Yeah.”She glanced down at herself, an irrational need to make sure she was still in one piece overtaking her mind.“Um… it didn’t really keep though.I think… because the energy from the satellites was technically solar… and I kind of absorbed a lot of it maybe that kept me alive.”

“Uh Huh.”Winn squinted, skipping right over what she had said to continue in a slightly accusatory tone.“I had a lot I wanted to say to you; a lot that I—there was so much that I wanted to say and now…”Kara was suddenly enveloped in a very wet, very cold hug.Winn’s nose was freezing, but Kara still tried to hug him back, even though she was unwilling to release Alex to do so properly.It turned more into a scrunching of her shoulders and hard press of her head, but Winn didn’t seem to mind.His breathing was ragged as if he had run a mile to get here, and considering his current state, he probably had.Well maybe not a mile, but at least through the front entrance.Winn had never really been one for cardio.“You know… no matter how much we’ve fought, I’ve always hated watching you leave.”

Blinking back tears, Kara held on to Winn tightly, his forgiveness washing over her like a balm.“Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Leia.”

“I’m so proud of you.”Winn murmured, and Kara wasn’t sure if he was talking about correctly placing the movie quote or for everything else but she found she could no longer hold in her tears.

“I love you Winn.” Because she hadn’t had a chance to say it before and he meant just as much to her as Alex did.He was her best friend.“I’m so sorry I hurt you.”

Alex shoved at her friend, finally bringing some space between them.“As sweet as this all is, you’re going to get her sick if you bring her temp down any more.”

Winn wiped at his face, smile nearly blinding as he pulled a protesting Alex into his arms.

Astra arrived as Alex pulled Winn’s underwear up from his back, the small man squealing at the wedgie he had just received.

Her aunt didn’t stand frozen like Winn had, didn’t take in any of the data on the machines.One moment Kara saw her land on the balcony, the locked glass doors parting easily to allow her entry, and the next Kara’s face was being cradled by impossibly warm hands.

Kara was sobbing at the first brush of fingers.

Astra shushed her, her thumbs swiping over Kara’s cheeks as she held her niece tenderly.“Rao has truly blessed us this day Little One, there is no room for tears.”

That only made Kara cry harder, and it was only then that Astra pulled her into a warm embrace, gently cradling her niece like she was the most precious gift she had been given.There was a lot that Kara needed to know from her family but right now, after everything that had happened, all the years of thinking Astra was dead or that she just hadn’t wanted her… it felt so good just to be in her aunt’s arms.

So good, that she felt her eyes starting to droop in a sudden all-encompassing sense of fatigue.Astra caught her against her chest, before gently lowering Kara to the bed.Alex released her hand to help with her legs.

“She’s exhausted.I’m gonna put in an IV for fluids but as soon as she wakes up, she’ll need a meal of some kind.”Alex was saying as she adjusted the soft knit blankets over Kara’s immobile form.Kara tried to protest but she could barely keep her eyes open.

Astra stroked her cheek, the soft hiccups remaining from Kara’s sobs stilling with the contact.“Rest Little One.We will all be here when you wake up.”

And that small promise allowed Kara to sink into darkness, the soft press of Alex’s mouth to her hairline following her into her dreams.

~*~

When she woke up the sun was nearly blinding.Someone had moved her hospital bed to directly lay against the tall glass windows, and the unforgiving beams shone down on her.

Raising her hand, she pressed her fingers to her eyes, her brow furrowing at the now normal headache that came in her waking hours.The doctor’s in Honduras had told her she’d had a very bad brain bleed and so could expect intermittent headaches from time to time.

At the time she hadn’t really cared, having dealt with far worse in her lifetime.But now, having dealt with the lasting red ball of fury bouncing between her ears for a few weeks, she was sick of its existence.There was something to be said for the long game.

Her nightmares chased her into wakefulness, probably the sole reason she was awake in the first place.She only ever managed sleep when she was dead tired, and even then, her dreams usually woke her before she was fully rested.Luckily, Kara was used to the haunting images in her head, and had learned to stuff them to the back of her mind as soon as she awoke.Not the healthiest form of coping but she found that she was unable to actually confront her fears alone.So she’d taken a page from Alex’s book and had repressed like mad.Except where Alex had turned to alcohol, Kara had turned to doing things.Anything.The first thing that popped into her head usually.

So, unfortunately for her aching brain, she had things she needed to take care of.

Struggling into a sitting position, she swung her legs over the bed, bracing her hand on the railing.

A soft squeak had her looking up in time to brace herself for Ni’s hug.It was tight and uncomfortable, and Kara had _missed_ this.

“Hi.”

“You will not leave my sight from now on.”Ni said, a scared quality that Kara hadn’t heard in years filtering into her voice.

“Understood.”She paused, blinking at the window again and judging that they were due for twilight soon, the sun so bright because it was low and directly in front of her window.In an armchair in the corner, Winn snored loudly, a phone clutched tightly in his hands.Ni had tutted at him, but Kara had stopped her from waking him up.Apparently Winn had been left behind to watch her and she didn’t much feel like being watched.“Do you think you could take me somewhere then?”

Alex had apparently forbid Ni from driving anything, so the alien had their receptionist, Frank, order them an uber from his phone.The thing looked nearly as big as him, but he made do, and Kara wisely chose not to comment.“Where is everyone?”

“Astra is watching your girl, and Alex had to go help with a shooting downtown.She told me to watch you and call her as soon as you woke up, but she said that wouldn’t happen until very late.She said she’d be back way before then so she will be very grumpy with you when she returns.”

“Oh.Did you call her?”

Ni’s face, blank of features as they rode the elevator down, still managed to look confused.“Are you fully awake?”

Kara smiled, exhausted.“Not yet; we can call her when we reach our destination.”

Ni nodded and transformed her face into the features found on a Spanish woman, ever aware of human fear as they walked towards the car.

Stepping into CatCo was weird and for a long moment Kara rethought her decision.But Linda had had two arms, and a harsh updo, and business appropriate clothing.Kara Zor-El had on one of Alex’s old hoodies and a pair of loose athletic pants.Her feet were covered in sneakers about 2 sizes too big and her hair, though she’d tried braiding it back, was a bird’s nest she was sure.This was hardly the kind of outfit one should wear to a potential employer, but Kara had no other options; no other clothes.And she refused to ask Alex to purchase anything for her.

She was going to prove she could stand on her own feet starting now.

No burdens.

She led Ni to the service entrance of the building and around the corridors to Cat’s personal elevator.The access codes were the same as the last time she was here.Surprising given that she had attacked Cat shortly after.

Winn must not have been around to change anything.

Riding the elevator up, Kara hoped that she wouldn’t find too many employees still on the floor.It was late and getting later, she hoped they would have emptied out by now.Maybe Cat still had her curfew in place?

Maybe she didn’t hate Kara?

Maybe Alex had explained…

Her thoughts were interrupted by the elevator dinging, the silver doors opening in front of them and displaying the empty CatCo office floor.

Ni nudged her as she stepped onto the floor, cell phone held precariously between her fingers.“Do I call now?”

Kara nodded absently, eyes already on the blonde CEO in her office.

Cat wasn’t alone.

Lena Luthor stood at her side, and next to her stood several men and 2 women with sharp suits.

And they were all staring at Kara.

Cat said something, turning to her audience as she started to shake the hands of the group.

Lena wasn’t so polite, her eyes remaining on Kara the entire time it took to empty the room.

“ _You weren’t supposed to let her out!”_ Alex’s voice coming over from Ni’s phone shook her back to reality. _“We talked about this!She was on bed rest.Do you remember what bed rest is?”_

Ni made an annoyed sound and said something about healing longer than Alex had been alive but glanced at Kara as if she were about to spontaneously combust.

Kara didn’t dwell on the conversation, her attention was for Cat Grant, her mentor motioning her into her office as the board members walked towards the public elevator.

Stepping into the large space, Kara had never felt smaller.

She had tried to kill this woman, and now here she was about to ask for help.

“Ms. Grant—”

Kara had barely gotten the words out before Lena had crossed the room to hug her.Ms. Grant leaned back against her desk, arms crossed casually; but Kara had worked with the woman for almost a year and she knew the CEO had been taken off guard.

“Alex told us you wouldn’t be up until tomorrow.”Lena said, pulling back to take Kara in, her eyes dropping to her missing arm almost immediately.

Tugging on the empty sleeve, Kara tried for her own careless shrug.“I guess I’m just kind of an over achiever.”She tried but she couldn’t quite hold eye contact with either woman.“I just—I wanted to say that I am really, _really_ sorry.”

Cat pushed herself off the desk, stalking forward like a predator to stand before them even as Lena shook her head in denial.

“What are you apologizing for exactly Kara?The last time I checked saving the world, at great personal sacrifice mind you, hardly required any form of forgiveness.”Cat’s eyes were as sharp as ever and Kara faltered in her planned speech because… ok, yes, she had taken out the satellites but all the things she’d done _before…_

“You weren’t in control.”Lena asserted, her hand resting softly on Kara’s arm.“None of us blame you or hold any malice towards you.We’re just…”Her friend licked her lips and tried again, eyes suspiciously wet.“We’re very happy that you are alive Kara.”

Caught off guard by their response, Kara found herself shifting again, pulling her arm from Lena’s hand so she could tug at her hair.“I um… Alex didn’t know I left the hospital, so we probably don’t have a lot of time but… I don’t have any money,” she glared at her feet, unsure of herself and the way this was coming out.Dammit she should have written her speech down!“That’s not what –I don’t… I _know_ I’m not educated and that you can’t hire me back as Linda Taylor, but I thought maybe…”She rubbed at the crinkle in her brow, eyes closing as she fought to bring herself to bare.“If you had a spot on your janitorial staff, I would truly appreciate the opportunity Ms. Grant.”She stopped fidgeting, forcing herself to meet Cat’s eyes like her mentor had always told her and squared her shoulders.“You told me once to fight for my self-worth so I’m here today to do that.To get a job so that I can start earning my own way.”

Lena bit her lip and looked away.

Ms. Grant looked like she was fighting a face palm.“Do you remember that I also said that you should be treated in a manner that you deserve?Demand respect or fall beneath the stampede?”Kara swallowed and nodded, trying to keep the movement as unjerky as possible.“Then why, you sweet delusional child, are you here, asking for a position as a janitor?”Kara opened her mouth to respond but Cat waved her hand, cutting off her words.“It’s a respectable field to be sure, but hardly one that I would imagine _you_ in.Your pursuits remained in the creative field.”

Now she was confused.“Creative?”

“I saw your sketchbooks.”Ms. Grant circled back to sit behind her desk, reclining in her chair and taking in the two young women in front of her.“When they were clearing out your apartment, Agent Scully and I went through your things, trying to decide what would be kept and what donated.I saw your sketches.If I wasn’t so sure you were in love with our mopey agent, I’d be half sure that you were in love with me or Ms. Luthor.”

Kara’s face flamed, and her fidgeting returned, all of her carefully composed discipline evaporating as Lena chuckled next to her.“She’s teasing you.We’re still in shock… this is all… very shocking.”

Cat tapped her fingers in her chair’s armrests.“Since we are on the topic of things I said, I believe I also promoted you the last time we spoke.You were supposed to decide your future career path; have you?”

“Ms. Grant… you offered that to Linda Taylor.I don’t—”

“Have the education, yes I know.I didn’t ask that.I asked you very clearly what is was that _you_ wanted to do.What do you want to dedicate your life to Kara?”

Helpless, Kara bit her lip and turned to Lena, unconsciously looking for backup in the face of this unexpected line of questioning.She’d come here to beg for a job that didn’t require a degree and now Cat was offering her… what?A promotion?A path?

Lena shook her head, “don’t look at me.I had my future decided for me.You get to choose; that’s special.I’m not going to take that away from you.”Lena turned those green eyes on Cat, her smile reprimanding.“Of course, it _is_ a lot to take in.Cat can surely give you more time if you’re not—”

“My art.”Kara bit her lip, the words having left on their own accord and startling her with their abruptness.Unable to take them back though she ploughed on.“I could… I like art.”

Cat nodded, “you want to be a painter?”

That sounded nice—amazing even.The idea of locking herself away in a room and just putting brush to canvas, allowing all of her thoughts to take form on a blank sheet… it was more than she had ever dreamed.To be able to just express herself for a living.

She opened her mouth to say yes but something stopped her.Her arm stopped her.

When she’d painted before, sketched before, she’d had the use of both hands.With only one…

Alex had called her an artist.Winn had fawned over her sketch pads.With only one hand would they still think her work up to par?

_ You’re an artist.You could make a career out of it if you really wanted to. _

Would Alex still think that was true?

Bile rose in her throat and she felt herself start to panic, closing her eyes and focusing on her breaths to try to stay her anxiety.Deep breaths, focus on the little things.That’s what Alex’s doctor had told her; the smaller the picture the less there was to worry about and the clearer the problem in front of you.

The long-ago memory of her talking to Alex’s doctor niggled at her brain.She remembered how Alex had struggled, how she’d obviously needed the help but hadn’t wanted to leave Kara alone; and then when they had gotten to the appointment how Alex had looked almost ten years younger.How Dr. McKay had made _Kara_ feel younger; made her feel safe.She’d thought that was amazing; that being able to affect someone in such a positive way was something _she_ wanted to know how to do, if only even for self-preservation, and had asked Dr. McKay about her field of practice; the requirements…

Kara was nowhere close to having the qualifications necessary but the idea of helping people… of maybe making a _difference._

“What’s going on in that head of yours?”Lena murmured, hand reaching up to push some of Kara’s hair back, so she could see her face.“This is your choice, we’ll support you no matter what you decide.”

Eyes rising to meet Cat’s, Kara tried not to let her terror show.She had no business wanting this… no business asking—

“A therapist.”She said breathlessly, feeling near faint at the confession.“I want to help people.My art isn’t… I want to help.”

Ms. Grant hummed, eyes connecting with Lena’s for a moment before dropping to her desk.The blonde jotted something down on a notepad, picked up her phone and tapped at the screen a few times before rising to her feet.“That is very doable, although I should tell you, the two are not mutually exclusive.Art Therapy is a very respectable field of practice and it’s growing every day.I believe you could still have the best of both world’s Kara.”

Wetting her lips, Kara tried not to look too dumbstruck.“That’s it?Just like—I mean, what do I have to… do?”

“Close your mouth for one.”Kara did, and her mentor came to stand in front of her, their height differences doing nothing to shrink Ms. Grant’s personality.“For two I think you should discuss this with your… Agent, before we decide on what school you go to.I’m sure the two of you will need to work out some sort of schedule—”

“I can’t afford school!”Kara blurted, the small hope she’d allowed herself to have being dashed right before her eyes.“Ms. Grant if you would just let me work—”

“Lind— _Kara.”_ Lena interrupted, turning so that she stood next to Cat against Kara.“Allow me to say that even if Cat wasn’t willing to pay for your studies, L-Corp would.You saved _the world._ Tuition is not even a drop in the bucket for what we owe you.”

Kara shifted, her body itching with the attention she was receiving.She shook her head.“You don’t owe me anything.I –”

“You are my _friend!”_ Lena insisted, green eyes glowing with her intent.“Even if you had done nothing else, _that_ would be enough.”

Not knowing what to say to that or how to react to the passion in Lena’s voice, Kara chose instead to look powerlessly out the window.

“Kara.” Cat’s voice was patient, but her expression said she was very close to _not_ being patient anymore.

“Yes Ms. Grant?”

Cat didn’t try to pull her focus, just continued in that same precise tone.“While you were… gone, there was an initiative put into place to help aliens.CatCo, L-Corp, Smoak Technologies… the DEO… we all banded together to create what we hope will be the future of alien and meta education, job placement, and healthcare.As you can imagine, finding people to actually sign up has been a work in progress.”Cat paused, her eyes narrowing as she looked for something in Kara’s face.There was a brief flash of _something_ in those green eyes before Cat was straightening, a slightly proud smile coming to her lips.It made something twist in Kara’s gut, like she’d just been run over in an avalanche of some kind.No way was this happening.It just couldn’t be this easy. “We have sworn to keep all information of species and abilities private; those matters are for the DEO to resolve.The private entities will hold no records, serve no other purpose than to assist aliens in finding a place on this planet.Art therapy is a valid field of study Kara and mental health is just as important as physical health.It’s been a nightmare to find anyone willing who is actually capable of beginning the healing process in the refugees we’ve worked with so far.”She huffed as if this were all common sense and gave Kara a bored look, butterflies flapping like dragons in the pit of the Kryptonian’s belly.“We currently do not have an art therapist.You want to become an art therapist.This would solve our problem.”

“But I don’t have—”

Cat’s eyes flashed, and Kara’s jaw clicked shut.“You are _not_ an idiot Kiera!Stop trying to make yourself out to be one.It will take time yes, but the hope is that your advanced mind will turn a few years education into a minimal setback and you can begin practicing at the new facility this time next year.If you truly wish to indebt yourself, then you can exchange your tuition for years worked.We’ll call it square.Now, I suggest you brace yourself because your agent does _not_ look happy.”

Before Cat could step away Kara was hugging her; her arm banding across Ms. Grant’s shoulders and her body trembling.Cat Grant was without question one of the greatest women Kara had ever had the honor of knowing.It didn’t matter that Kara had no marketable skills; all that seemed to matter to Cat was that Kara understood and accepted that she had a future.A place in the world outside of CADMUS.

Kara had a _place_.

“ _Thank you_ , Ms. Grant.”

Surprisingly Cat hugged her back, her voice thick when she responded.“Hush now.You can hardly be an effective therapist is you’re blubbering about a simple transaction.”

A final squeeze and Kara took a step back, her eyes landing on Lena who was giving her that knowing smirk.

But there was something that had been bugging Kara for a while and, as she glanced out the glass doors and saw Alex stalking towards them, she knew her chance to ask was quickly slipping away.

“Did you shoot me?”Lena’s smirk dropped off her face, her eyes widening comically as she tried to formulate a response.Kara nodded, turning to face Alex as she checked that box off.“I thought so.”

Alex had her tirade ready to go as soon as she opened the doors to Cat’s office.

And Kara would normally have been contrite; might have even cowered on a good day but now?

Now she couldn’t stop smiling.

Alex was here.

And Ni was here.

And Cat and Lena and…

And she’d just maybe gotten herself a _future._

It had been a good day.

She could smile as hard as she wanted.

~*~

Alex was not smiling.

Alex had been scowling since they’d left CatCo and she’d left Ni with a giant van and instructions to get it back to the clinic.

Ni had hissed at the human, tightening Alex’s jacket and wrapping a scarf around her neck despite it being near summer now.Alex had accepted it in stride, obviously used to the fussing but no less upset about the sneaking off.

So now Kara was in another Uber with a very irritated Alex Danvers.

She didn’t mind; when they’d first gotten in the car she’d reached over and laced their fingers together and Alex hadn’t pulled away.

As far as Kara was concerned, Alex could be as annoyed as she wanted as long as Kara could still hold her hand.

The dark blue sedan they were riding in pulled up in front of what looked like a Firehouse under construction.The yard was full of assorted masonry, wooden beams, and cement bags and the soil was completely overturned, showing nothing but fresh dirt all around.The red brick of the building was freshly pointed but the far-left side had a blue tarp covering the wall and a huge portion of the roof.It was clearly a work in progress; whoever had been working on it had installed large glass windows and a beautiful wooden door on the front entrance.When it was finished the crew that worked here would be very happy.Not that Kara understood what they were doing here.When Alex thanked the driver and slid out of the back seat, tugging Kara along behind her, she was as clueless as she usually was when it came to Alex.

Still, there was a certain allure to the mystery Alex always exuded; a certain level of anticipation that Kara looked forward to whenever they were together.

Winn had said it was because she had an affinity for side quests, but Kara was pretty sure she just had an affinity for Alex.

Her _girlfriend—_ because Kara once again had the right to call her that and she wasn’t going to ever stop—turned to her once they were on the sidewalk, drawing Kara to a halt next to her.

“I am not ok with what you did back there,” Alex started, her eyes serious and lightened to an almost cinnamon brown in her anger.“You scared the shit out of me!When Winn called and said you were gone… I thought—you can’t _do_ that again ok?I need to know that you’re ok.I’m not trying to trap you or be overbearing but—I need to know you’re ok.”

“Ok.” Kara agreed easily, mirroring Alex’s seriousness.“I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking about how worried you would be… I guess I’m still not used to people feeling that way about me.I just wanted to be able to… offer you something.I didn’t want to be a burden.”

“Oh for the love of—” Alex threw up her hands, stalking away for a moment before returning to Kara’s side just as quickly as she had left it.“You aliens are _infuriating._ I can’t even—you are not a _burden_ Kara.You could never _be_ a burden.Not to me.”She took Kara’s hand again and cupped her cheek, the feeling of Alex’s hands on her skin a balm to Kara’s anxieties.“I understand that you need something of your own.I do.I get it but it’s something that you can talk to me about ok?I mean I’ve already set you up with a new identity, background… I love you; you don’t have to find your own way by yourself is what I’m saying.” 

Biting her lip, Kara turned her cheek further into Alex’s slightly roughened palm bashfully.“I… ok.I’m sorry for scaring you… I guess this um relationship stuff is still just… kind of new to me?”

Alex rolled her eyes and pulled her into a soft kiss, “well get used to it you goober.You have a family now.”Another kiss, this one quick and teasing and making Kara want to grab Alex’s head and hold her still.But Alex was already away from her and smirking knowingly.“Speaking of… this is my house.”She made a wide sweeping gesture of her arm towards the Firehouse and then turned to Kara, all shy smiles and hands scratching chins.“Well, I mean _our_ house since I’m really hoping you’re not against moving in but… yeah.Kalasin picked it out and we’re remodeling right now but, it’s ours.”Kara’s gaze darted between the beautiful structure and the beautiful woman, unsure what was more unreal at the moment.Alex squeezed her hands and Kara fixed her gaze on hers.“Kara… If you want this it’s yours… but you don’t have to decide right now.Right now, I would like it if you would come up for dinner.Our kid is up there and so are your aunt and sister…”Alex squinted, face turning pensive as she continued her list.“My mom… probably the Sirens actually… maybe Winn.”Kara stared and Alex offered an apologetic smile.“I’m not trying to overwhelm you but… I just want you to be prepared.”

Kara was immobile for several long moments and it took Alex gently shaking her hand to bring her back to the present moment.

It was just…

Alex had said ‘our’.She had called Kalasin ‘our kid’.Like she was both of theirs.Like she meant something to her.

Exhaling slowly, Kara forced herself to focus on the rest of it before her heart went into conniptions.The rest of it being an impromptu family dinner.

That was a lot of people…

But it was a lot of people she cared about; a lot of people who cared about _her._

No more hiding.

She could do this.

~*~

Watching Kara reunite with her family had been the single most wonderful and painful experience of Alex’s life.Kalasin had actually _hidden_ behind _Alex_ when she’d seen her mother walk through the door and Kitai’s earlier warning that the small girl had never had a mother had rung clear in her ears.

There was no doubt in Alex’s mind that Kalasin loved Kara and vice versa, but for most of their time together, their _time_ together had only ever meant _pain._ That wasn’t very conducive to a healthy, happy reunion.

Kitai had stepped up in the girl’s place and wrapped her sister in a tight hug, Kara’s startled laugh a choked sob.Harley had quietly lifted Kalasin from behind Alex and taken her to another room for privacy, Wren trotting along behind them after giving Kara a warm nuzzle.

“I thought you were _dead_.”Kara sobbed, arm banded tight around Kitai’s waist.“You sent me away and then those soldiers—”

Her words broke off and Kitai pulled her more firmly against her, securing Kara’s head to her shoulder.

“No Mije,” She whispered, eyes glassy and jaw clenched.“I was prepared to die but not even the destruction of our world could prevent me from trying to find my way back to you.You are my heart always.”Kara’s cries harshened and Kitai rocked her gently, Astra watching with crossed arms and a distressed look.“I’m so sorry Mije, I’m so sorry we didn’t get to you in time.We looked _everywhere._ If we had known...”

“I’m sorry I believed them.”Kara choked back, making Alex’s heart _throb._ “I shouldn’t have listened.I shouldn’t have—”

Cupping her sister’s face in her hands, Kitai pulled back staring intently into Kara’s tear-filled eyes.“Are you serious?Do you know how _brave_ you are?”A soft smirk turned up her lips, fingers stroking over Kara’s wet cheeks, eyes filled with wonder.“You are a true warrior Mije, the strongest of us all.You have brought great honor to the House of El.I love you always.”

There had been a long group hug after that between the remaining Kryptonians, and Alex and the others had excused themselves to the long dining room table to give them some much needed privacy.

Coincidentally, the dining room was one of the few rooms Alex had completed, sitting just off the kitchen and sharing an open space with the living room.The grey couch served as the room’s divider along with the large burgundy rug that covered the maple wood floors in the living room.They gathered around a table of the same color and started to split tasks when they saw Eliza had already started setting up the dinner she had prepared with Astra’s help.

Because Astra could allegedly cook.

Allegedly.There was no way _Alex_ was going to be the one to take the first bite.

Alex sat towards the end of the table, the booth like seating that Clark had designed to become part of the wall, able to hold her guests and then some.Apparently Clark thought she was a social person.

False.

When Astra, Kitai, and Kara joined them a short while later, Eliza had just finished setting out the bowls of food.Selina had helped her set the table and Pam had been in charge of drinks.Alex was management and had supervised the whole thing.

Kara moved to sit next to her, her hand swiping at her cheeks as Alex wrapped her arm around her shoulders.Pressing her lips to Kara’s head, she inhaled slowly, taking in the moment and adjusting her head when Kara burrowed into her neck.

“Are you hungry?”She asked after a moment, allowing her fingers to tangle in blonde strands.Kara shrugged, quiet now as everyone around them tried to pretend that they weren’t concerned about her.“Mom made chocolate pecan pie but you can only have some if you eat real food first.”

Wrinkling her nose, Kara looked up at Alex.“You’ve spent way too much time around children.”

Thinking of the last few weeks Alex couldn’t help but grin.“Entirely possible.”She jiggled her shoulder until Kara sat up.“Do you want any eggplant parm?”

Dinner passed quickly after that and, before Alex could fake offer to help, her mother was already shooing them off to bed.Kara gave Winn and her family proper hugs and waved at the Sirens as she started to follow Alex.She stopped at the stairs and turned back to wrap herself around Eliza for several long moments.

Eliza squeezed her back as best she could with dishes in her hand.

“You’re going to need new clothes,” her mom said softly, an edge of hope bleeding into her voice.“Maybe tomorrow we could go out?See what we can find?”

Kara nodded, “I’d like that.”

Alex had led Kara to the back of the house where the master bathroom lay across the hall from her bedroom.She’d shown her the towels and basic necessities before moving to leave.Kara had cupped her cheek and pressed her back against the door with her hips.

“Will you stay?”She breathed, lips ghosting over Alex’s.“We don’t have to do anything I just—I _need_ you.”

And so, Kara’s shower had ended with Alex on her knees in worship, hot water raining down over her back and shoulders and drowning out most of the noise.She took her time, movements reverent as she basked in the life she was holding in her hands and, when Kara came, a soft broken cry escaping her lips, Alex felt something solidify in her chest.She rose to her feet and kissed her girl, pulling her close as she finally accepted that this was real.That Kara was alive and relatively healthy and _hers._ It would take a while for her to get used to that fact but she didn’t need to doubt it anymore; question it.

Kara was _alive_.

She was alive.

She was alive.

She was alive.

Helping Kara into one of her sweatshirts was a slight task since her girl seemed to be beat from their earlier activities, and she couldn’t help feeling slightly smug at that which lead to more kisses and distractions.By the time they were in bed, Alex was feeling very warm and fuzzy.

Wren clambered onto Kara’s pillow while they were exchanging quiet words and a few seconds later, Kalasin squirmed between them, snuggling into Alex’s chest and ignoring Kara on her other side.For a second, Alex was afraid that Kara would be jealous or angry but instead the woman merely smiled and stroked over her daughter’s head.Kalasin sighed and relaxed further into Alex.

“I’m really happy she had you.”Kara murmured, and when she raised her eyes to Alex’s they were filled with gratitude.“Thank you.I know there’s nothing I could ever do to repay you but just… _thank_ you.”

Alex leaned over Kalasin and pecked Kara on the lips.“You have nothing to thank me for.I love both of you; I’d do anything to keep you safe and happy.”

Kara beamed, and Alex kissed her again, heart swelling at her ability to coax that happiness out of the Kryptonian.

“There’s so much I have to tell you.So many apologies I need to make.”Kara said sleepily, snuggling further down into her pillow, eyes straining against unconsciousness.

Alex smiled, and held Kalasin with one hand, the fingers of her other tracing the lines of Kara’s face.“You don’t ever have to apologize to me Kara, not for anything that’s happened… And I’m not going anywhere… We have time now.”

“I love you.”Kara’s hand slipped over Kalasin’s belly, thumb rubbing over her daughter’s ribs.Kalasin squirmed and gripped Kara’s larger hand in her tiny fingers, pulling until Kara’s arm wrapped around her.She still didn’t face Kara or say anything but it was clear that she was happy to have her mother back.

Alex watched them both fall asleep at precisely the same moment, identical exhales leaving them as they fell into their dreams.

“I love you too.”She whispered, the ‘I’ve got you’ echoing in her mind but remaining unsaid. 

Alex watched them for a while, mind still buzzing with the way her life had changed in a mere instant; wherever Kara went drastic goodness followed.As she was thinking this, both of her girls frowned, brows crinkling in their sleep.Alex pulled them both closer to her chest, humming softly and rubbing her cheek against Kalasin’s forehead.

“You can’t have them.”She murmured to whatever demon was threatening them in the dreams.“You’ll have to go through me first.”

Kara gave a stuttered sigh and her face relaxed, some of the tension leaving Alex’s body as the apparent danger was thwarted.

Closing her own eyes now, she had a feeling they would be ok.She and her family had rebuilt their entire lives with nothing but each other after the battle… they could rebuild this too.Kara wasn’t alone anymore and neither was Alex.She planned on spending the rest of forever with Kara and nothing was going to get in the way of that.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO! From the top.
> 
> Alex has her own practice. I always liked that Alex was the one who treated Kara in the show and practically no one else until Maggie. Like the only reason she learned how to fix people was so that she would know how to fix Kara. That same thread follows here except now she's using her powers for good. Also I'd like to say that Alex may not be an 'agent' anymore but that does not mean she's not badass. It just means she's a bit more of a vigilante badass since most of her patients will probably require rescuing of some sort. SO that's the head canon.
> 
> What'd you guys think of Frank? I find him hilarious and I imagine also that he waddles or 'pads'... like a duck or a penguin. :) que lindo. Love it.
> 
> And yeah, Kara's alive. OF COURSE I COULDN'T KILL HER. I LOVE HER. She is my heart and she's been through so much and no way would I make Alex cry... for long. SO yeah she's alive and she remembers everything because between being in outer space and like right next to the sun and absorbing all of that solar energy from the satellites our girl managed to charge up enough to wipe CADMUS' damages and survive her bout with the Galactoid. In my own mind, were she not fighting the Galactoid and destroying the satellites, thus draining her energy, she would have overcharged like Overgirl in the crossover and eventually went boom. Because she was discharging at the same time she was charging at rather alarming rates, her body nixed the balance and she passed out, hence the fall. The withdrawal is just normal for any species; you get used to something long enough and have it abruptly taken away you're goin through withdrawal. No escape. Sorry. Sucks for you.
> 
> I'd also like to point out some of the lines Kara uses: "Found you" a reference to her and Alex playing tag right before their first kiss. "I thought I'd come after you this time." a reference to Alex spending 10 years of her life going after Kara. :)
> 
> I hope the reunions were good. I just didn't realize how many I would actually need until I started writing them and then that's when this took on a mind of it's own. Hence, not everyone got time/ elongated time with Kara.
> 
> I decided Kara's vocation after the prologue. Art Therapy for someone who knows the amount of pain Kara's been through? Yes, please. ANd it is also selfishly why I wrote so much about Alex's therapy sessions. Our girl needed a push. And Cat Grant. She'll probably always need Cat Grant. I realized yesterday that she was only mentioned in S3 and I nearly cried. #bringbackCat
> 
> Kalasin reacting the way she did is normal imo. If you look at it from her perspective: she and Alex have just started to find their groove and be comfortable with each other. The girl got her first 'I love you' mere days before! Now with all that, finally finding your happy, your mom comes back from the dead. Which would normally be great except everytime you've seen your mom before, bad things happen and you just started to be happy. Wouldn't you be terrified of that changing to? Kalasin loves Kara wholeheartedly, she's just scared. Kid earned that.
> 
> Lastly, I really like the idea of Kara and Kally being mirror images of each other. Melts my heart.
> 
> And ok. That's all folks. There's like a 1k post epilogue epilogue that I wrote that might go up tomorrow or Thursday but other than that. I'm done. I'll save my goodbyes for that last piece but wow, it's been a crazy ride.
> 
> Thank you all so much for staying on this journey with me. You've made this all so very worth it.
> 
> ~Chronicles


	26. Send a Prayer to the Ones Up Above

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here it is. The final piece. The last Jedi. Aang and Katara kissing in the sunset. Thelma and Louise driving onto a rainbow and entering Narnia...
> 
> I dedicate this one to Keziah, thanks for getting me through that first half, without you none of this would have been possible. Cheers!
> 
> Song: Believer- Imagine Dragons :)

** Send A Prayer to the Ones Up Above **

Stepping into the dimly lit hospital room, Kara exhaled slowly taking in the room’s occupant.The last few days had been… difficult.The morning after she’d spent her first night back in Alex’s arms, the former agent had made her and Kalasin a large breakfast of all of Kara’s favorites, kissed her, and told her the people who had died in the battle against Brainiac.

Fiora.

Bob.

Mon-El.

People she had considered friends, family.She’d gone to each of their burial sites, Kitai, Astra, Alex, Kalasin and Wren by her side and had paid her ‘respects’.Kara hadn’t been sure of that terminology originally but after a brief discussion with Alex, had understood it to mean saying goodbye.

She understood that all too well, but she was still glad she had asked. Kitai had told her it meant gifting the slain with the death of their murderers.

So she’d made plans, with Alex’s assistance, and, when everything had been ready, she’d stopped at Bob’s resting place first.On his grave she’d had Ni assist her burying a new collection of silly straws near his headstone.The original collection was now being used by the children in the camp and Kara was loathe to take them away when it meant that they were partaking in something Bob had enjoyed so fondly.

Mon-El had been easier.He had been sent off in the way of Krypton and Daxam and so there was no body left for Kara to pay her respects to but M’gann had dedicated a wall to the Daxamite on her newly rebuilt bar.The only wall that had been part of the original construction actually.On it, she had invited anyone who wanted to leave a handprint to symbolize the lives Mon-El had touched in his sacrifice.Kara had left hers on an empty spot and had used finger paints to draw a small impression of Fezzik from the _Princess Bride_ with the words ‘Brute Squad’ below her tribute.She’d said a quiet thank you and then tugged Alex away, her human’s eyes impossibly sad as they looked upon the nearly full wall.

The last stop had been Fiora, who, like Mon-El, did not have a gravesite for Kara to go to.Her body had simply become one with the ether when she had given her life to save others.It had been tricky getting herself, Alex, Kalasin, and Wren over to the EU undetected, but between Astra and Kitai, they had managed.Afterwards it had been simple to plant the Oriental Lilies on the nearest soil to where Fiora had had her last stand.Nalgerians had danced stars into existence and now Fiora would forever have stars near her.In Kara’s book, it was Fiora’s sacrifice that had brought the foreign flowers to this particular part of the world, and with Alex’s help, she had planted the seeds well enough that it would be difficult for anyone to uproot them.

“You’ll have to come back,” Alex warned as Kara dusted dirt from her pants legs.“They’ll need you to care for them every once in a while.”

“I will bring you.”Astra asserted, moving to step up next to her niece.“At least until your powers return.”

Kara had smiled at her aunt, which had somehow gotten her a kiss from Alex and the small family had returned to their home.

Kara had a _home_ now.

A _family._

She was only missing a friend.

Kara looked down at her staunchest ally, allowing her fingers to trace the muscles in Katu’s bicep.Kara’s own personal hero was prostate on the hospital bed in Alex’s clinic, several tubes stabbing into her body and providing her with essential care to remove waste and provide nutrients.Kara remembered how much Katu had hated such things at CADMUS, when even a needle had been shoved in her direction she’d gone ballistic.She would _hate_ this.

“Oh Katu.”She sighed, reaching down and squeezing Katu’s cool fingers with her own.Alex had said that she was just sleeping; that they couldn’t get her to wake up and that it seemed self-inflicted.While it was a relief that Katu wasn’t seriously injured, she was still incapacitated.This was so not how she had imagined their reunion.

Leaning forward, she brushed her lips to Katu’s hairline, the messy curls controlled in several tiny braids.Kara smiled fondly; it was probably Ni’s concoction.

“I love you.”She whispered and had just started to pull back when she felt slight pressure in her palm.

“That’s not where you’re supposed to kiss me.Princesses get kisses on the lips.”

Kara blinked, stared at Katu’s still face, blinked again.

“Wha…”

A brown eye peeked open for a microsecond, the only sign that Katu was awake and aware.“I finished my nap but its lips or nothin Sweet Cheeks.”

Heart thundering in her chest, Kara leaned back in to peck Katu’s lips.And her cheeks and her eyes and _everything._ Katu smiled and wrapped surprisingly strong arms around the Kryptonian, laughing at the affection she was receiving.

“You’re the most beautiful princess I’ve ever seen!”Kara exclaimed between kisses.“Rao am I happy you’re ok!”

Katu grabbed her, sitting up and holding Kara close.“You too kid.I didn’t know how to do this without you.”

“You would have been fine.”Kara scoffed, obviously amused at Katu’s theatrics.

“No,” the other woman denied, voice soft where her mouth was pressed up against Kara’s ear. “I wouldn’t have.”

Kara was silent, just taking in the moment and enjoying having her friend back and _here._

“Hey Ponyboy?”

Kara huffed, ever amused.“Yeah?”

“Did you ride your Agent’s face yet?It’s very rideable.She’d got a really good jaw for—”

Kara flung herself back, hand shoving at Katu’s shoulder in mortification.Her cry of ‘Katu!’ only inciting further amusement and more lude gestures.

And even though her face was flaming, and her heart was having a boxing match with her stomach, Kara also recognized that she was smiling so hard it _hurt._ A good hurt.Finally.

She could live with that.

~*~

Alex waited patiently, knuckles rapping gently on the table in front of her.She had put this off for awhile and actually wished she could put it off for longer but with Kara and Kalasin in her life… she wasn’t willing to take any risks.

Amanda Waller smirked when she saw her, dressed in an orange jumpsuit and being led in chains over to the visitor’s booth.

Alex returned the smirk with a cold smile of her own, picking up the provided handset to speak to the criminal.Amanda sat slowly, taking her time picking up her own phone in an obvious show of superiority.

It’s not like Alex cared.Amanda was the one behind bars, not her.

“Good morning.”She said when Amanda had finally situated herself.“Did you get my present?”

“The charming letter or the charming toiletries Agent Danvers?Because I think we both know I’m allergic to oatmeal.”

“Shame.”Alex said, “good thing they weren’t for you.They were meant for you to give to the day guard.She’s a friend, you wanna survive your sentence, you’ll want to make nice with her.”

Curious, Amanda tilted her head, her usually pristine face devoid of any makeup and the smattering of freckles that was usually hidden now proudly displayed on her brown skin.

“Why would you try to help me?”

Alex leaned forward, brows raising in a challenge.“Because your going to give me information in return.”

“What kind of information?”Amanda asked, smirk back in place now that she thought she had the power.

Alex was silent.

Everything was silent.

Amanda frowned as that thought occurred to her too and she started to peer around her uncomfortably.

It was almost comical when the woman realized that the visitor’s hall had been emptied of everyone except her, Alex, and the guards.Amanda’s eyes widened and, when the gust of cold air hit her back, whirled around to see Superman in all of his glory; eyes glowing slightly in an unspoken threat.

Alex allowed her own smirk to form on her lips.“Do I have your attention now Amanda?”The woman nodded, mouth pinched in apprehension.“Good.Now, I need you to tell me something.”Alex lowered her voice, eyes narrowing into a glare as she enunciated each word carefully.“Where is my father?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's it. I can't believe I'm saying this but YWLM is now completed. On schedule. Not late, I don't hate it, and well recieved. That's the trifecta right there!
> 
> Still kind of stings. Very odd feeling. Might need a cake after this.
> 
> Kara needed a piece where she got to say goodbye to her friends and I also needed a reunion piece for Katu that didn't make me feel guilty about length.
> 
> And also, guiltily I have been holding on for a chance for Alex to use Zuko's line from Avatar Last Airbender in regards to Jeremiah and this is what I came up with. Very pleased. Especially because Clark FINALLY shows up for Alex. Yes!
> 
> As previously stated, this is a one time deal. There will be no part two, no large part two. That being said, I do want to keep the option open to dabble in this world so there will probably (almost certainly) be a few oneshots that I will add to a collection. Won't be for a while though. I need to recover from this behemouth and actually write things that make me money.
> 
> To any 'aspiring' fic writers out there I'd just like to say that it's ok to stall; we've all gotten stuck, take a breath, figure out the problem, and go at it another angle. Sometimes there's just not enough story for a plot idea and that is ok. Expand, build, or move on. That plot not treatin you right? Kick its ass to the curb, there are plenty more where that one came from. You're doin great. This took me a year to build and the way I did it? My readers, every milestone, every setback, every accomplishment, you guys were right there with me cheering me on to the next summit. Get yourself a good audience, 95% of the time, the rest will come. Be kind to yourself.
> 
> Also I find stress eating to be a great motivator.
> 
> To all of my readers: Thank you. I have immensely enjoyed being on this journey with you all and appreciate every comment, review, kudos, read, just everything. You guys have truly been amazing and I cannot be more grateful for this experience. You lit a fire under my ass and now I've got to go see how Pluto's doing since she's still being bullied by that Tyson fello.
> 
> See you when I get back :)
> 
> ~Chronicles


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